It pays to be content, then elated with what you have
8
The ruling elite must hate surfers. Indeed, those surfers should be toiling to enrich the capitalists instead; generating ever increasing wealth for them in exchange for poverty, poor health, lots of debt and poor prospects for escape.
The pursuit of happiness must remain a pursuit that never ends and is never reached by workers, unlike those happily unproductive surfers. Odd how the nations with the happiest people are just as productive as the nation full of workers pursuing happiness.
I suffered a spinal cord injury (rogue infection) leaving me in a permanent state of pain and paresthesia, was then fired after 22 years enriching a cruel capitalist owner-boss so he could getaway with the outright theft of over $80k of my earnings made worse by a Republican state government that blocked my moral right to sue the klepto-owner.
I remember my hang gliding days with fondness, even all the time waiting on the mountaintop for a launchable weather window or wind cycle. My job finally got in the way, grounding me.
Pain adds to my excuse to avoid participating in enriching capitalists through health depriving life sucking work or earning taxes that a State then uses AGAINST ME and revenue that ends up back in the pockets of those same parasitic capitalists.
Like surfers, I'm sailing all the time in my mind, with too few moments on my real boat as pain allows. It keeps me happy enough to keep going, looking forward to the day when I might really cast off and escape trump's-world.
8
The moments in the water at Capitola with the Dawn Patrol watching the sun rise over the Santa Cruz Mountains.
3
A beautiful insight, which captures the lives of many surfers.
But for many more surfers, other insights apply:
https://www.natyoung.com/surfrage.html
2
Powerful. Thank you.
6
I love this article so much.
6
At 72 I'm stoked to be the oldest bodysurfer at The Wedge in Newport Beach, CA. Started riding here over fifty years ago, and bought the house I live in to be close to my favorite break. It's not a lifestyle: it's a life. The story of me and my surfing buddies can be seen in the film "Dirty Old Wedge" on streaming video. Check it out!
5
"Surfing's the source. It'll change your life. Swear to God" Yes, it's a Point Break quote. It's also the truth.
2
Thank you . . . just thank you for writing this.
7
Wonderful and wise.
5
That day at 'reef', unbidden, cuts my mind,
Mostly, its your feet I see, slip tiredly down the wave's far side. The last, and largest, of her set.
That wave set caught us both inside.
Were you further out... and stronger?
Surfboards paddled frantically,
up each grey, moving, clasping hill.
Heaving boards through foaming tops
to our reward: another wave! Bigger than the last!
And on, and on, until... the last,
and largest, of her set.
Fate, in a set, is measured in feet.
Those few between us grew
Upon each wave-tops winnowing tug
Till all I had, was in your feet, slow motion o'er the wave.
The Wave!
That feathered peak of blue-grey death
blocked out the sky. Uncouth! A Sneer!
Frozen, I tossed by board away cuz
I wanted to live through what was coming.
Today, I pause, to write this poem
And waves of light from distant stars are life-sifted through my SETI screensaver.
Blue Planet, wedged between a Sun rock and a Space hard-place, can you build such waves? That morning
every wavelength that could fit in the Molokaʻi channel was
there, breaking on our secret surf spot.
That day at 'reef', was thirty years ago.
Perhaps, after such a time, my hearts thumping can now
be sifted on a nearby star.
Perhaps it could tell them not to invade.
Warn them that, on the Blue Planet, in a place called 'reef', they could Encounter. Blue.
Terror.
(SETI= search for extraterrestrial intelligence)
1
Linked to nature
2
Neil Young: Rollin' down that empty ocean road, gettin' to the surf on time. Long may you run. Love your spirit, your acceptance, your life surfing, looking death straight on. Thank you NYT for the posthumous positive publication. We need it.
8
Great piece....there is nothing that feels better than surfing.
2
...and NY can show how yo to surf (literally) also.
There are 3 local orgs, off the top, that teach adaptive surfing for adults and mids.
Love and share your same outlook on life (shh I'm a surfer). Let's get you out there!
Surfers Way
Skudin Surf
Life Rolls On
2
To surf is to be one with the earth’s energy, and to feel how very powerful it is.
Wow, that sounds groovy. But it’s true.
Not sure how exact the analogy is with being on pain meds, but OK. Glad the author knew some peace.
1
We are all on a short journey to death. Life is about how you take the ride and deal with the obstacles on the way.
7
I didn't realize she had died until I came back to save this beautiful article/life wisdom. May she ever be riding high on a beautiful eternal curl where disabilities can no longer coexist with happiness and spirit. Be stoked forever---
15
This same calculus is easily applied to sports I have done: hang gliding, kayaking and climbing. But I suspect if one truly measured the ratio of participating to waiting, surfing would have the lowest score.
I think much of life is spent waiting. If happiness is proportional to participating, we'd all be pretty sad people. Personally, I find a lot of joy in anticipating and remembering.
7
Very interesting story to read. Sad to learn that the writer is no more. May her soul rest in peace.
6
Do not start skiing BC powder or kayaking. The time we don't spend actually doing the sport is torture.
1
My surfing is horseback riding and like the surfers, I do not have to be actually sitting on a horse to be in that happy place. I have something in my life that brings me more joy than anything else I've experienced and therefore I chose every day to be joyful, even if I can't make it out to the barn.
I hope Ms. Avery took her joy with her to the end.
11
Lovely essay. When I was a child, my younger brother was horribly sick from allergies (and I believe asthma, altho never diagnosed). Living in the suburbs of WA DC, the summers were torture for him. Our pediatrician said the only thing we could do was to go the the ocean (5 hour car trip) so he could breathe the salt air. We had a great time in the car--each person would pick a song, and the whole car had to sing it. We played Geography, counted red Cadillacs & (I think Burma Shave signs--tho my memory of the last one may be wrong.)
An hour before we reached the Atlantic, the salt smell invaded the car. My parents rented a place for two weeks in Ocean City, and every day my bro & I went body surfing on air mattresses. The water was beautiful and warm, but we still had to read it and catch the wave--otherwise we could wipe out, and be dragged seaward by the undertow.
But catching a wave meant being pushed all the way up the beach. Wonderful feeling.
Years later in NO CA I never tried serious surfing--none of my friends were into it. The ocean was still lovely, but the Pacific doesn't have the salt smell.
10
@Rocky Mtn girl Yeah, I can identify. I was sick a lot early on in school. Mom was an ocean girl at heart. And I became a different girl at Ocean City. Reading your comment I can almost feel that thrill when the ocean picked up the surf mat, bounced you a bit and then flung you all the way up on the sand. Just to go back and do it all over all day. Mom always said "There's just something about that salt air; it's just good for what ails you." She was so right...
3
A lovely piece. For those of us who have or had significant health issue(s), living life in the present moment can be transformative; the surfing metaphor is a perfect fit. Thank you Ms. Avery, wherever you are!
18
Ms. Avery R.I.P. and thank you from a life long surfer (age 68) who started at age 11 on the shore break by the jetty near the Yankee Clipper hotel in Ft. Laud. Circa 1961.
Yes you’re right surfers are always surfers even when they are lawyers or other professions or avocations.
And yes more time is spent paddling out and waiting in the lineup for a set or rideable wind chop.
For me paddling out at the windless dawn at Ft. Pierce or Cocoa Beach in my youth then laying on my board waiting for a wave with the glassy ocean juxtaposed against the often cloudless dawn sky was always a spiritual experience.
Surfing has given me a life long love and deep appreciation of Mother Nature.
25
Most beautiful piece about surfing and life in general I have read in a long long time.
Having taken the C train at 5am in the morning to the Rockaways for years, happy and giddy with anticipation, I love that Ellis Avery put the sentiment in words perfectly.
14
Good points. The appeal is also just being on the water. There is good evidence that the first surfboards were designed simply to take the rider out into the sea, paddling while lying on their belly. Actually riding waves was probably invented for landing an outrigger canoe in big surf, where there was no harbor or inlet. The paddlers would catch the wave, ride it to the beach, and quickly pull the canoe out of the water.
Either way, people were both surfing and using surfboards before stand-up board riding was invented.
6
Having done a little surfing, a little sailing, and over 40 years of whitewater rafting and kayaking have given me a personal insight into what it really is about these activities that is so appealing. Yes, the "activity" itself is something you "do." But the common denominator to me is that, especially with non-motorized activities, I'm in a place I want to Be. For the most part, the experience is peaceful camaraderie, punctuated by flurries of sometimes extremely demanding and exhilarating action. People focused on motorized activities are often chasing where they want to go. On a sailboat, surfboard, raft, or in a kayak, I'm where I want to be. It doesn't get any better than that.
18
Surf life as a metaphor with all it's obstacles, annoyances, illnesses aches and pain works for me.
8
Growing up in San Diego Surfing was the best part of my life. Now at seventy it’s still with me. Being one with the ocean is an indescribable experience.
11
Mrs. Avery had a surfer's heart and soul. Would have loved to share a wave with you. RIP Ellis. Stay stoked!
29
Much respect to the author of this piece, for her spirit in a hard time, and her clarity of writing. This was a thought-provoking piece.
Having said that: surfers cheat. Real surfers don’t use boards.
4
@Dan in Orlando Touche, yeah, you don't often see body surfing anymore.
Also, I have surfed for decades and actually not very well. Life gets in the way so much...it doesn’t matter. This article broadens our exactly what makes it so joyful; it is a mystery. The author correctly understands its application to life in general and any surfer will tell you the same. Everything you have to do in life has a resolution in the water, and the chance you will find that joy of life that comes from the precious few moments of authentic bliss you find there. It’s spare occurrence makes it all the more valuable and animates every other in between commodity of time.
13
What a heartbreaking story and a great life lesson. I’m not brave enough to surf but watching those who do, I envy their freedom and skill. This is a classic tale of bloom where you’re planted. How tragic that her life ended far, far too soon.
15
In comparison to the surfers: Everyone I know knows that I spend inordinate amounts of time fishing the coastal waters of NH and Maine in my boat. They always ask, "Did you catch anything?" which is a legitimate question, but the more interesting answers are to questions like, "How was it out there?", "What did you see/hear/feel?", "What did you think about?" Fishing is in part an excuse to immerse myself in a mostly natural environment (except for my own introduction of a motorized piece of fiberglass - sorry planet) and I feel like fewer and fewer people have an inclination to do that, including a leader whose connection with the natural world seems limited to the very unnatural landscape of a private golf course. The desire to sacrifice some things for the good of the environment comes easily to those who sit on surfboards peering out at the next set of waves or in a boat watching the baitfish riffle the water's surface and adjusting drifts to winds and currents for hours or a lifetime. It is hard to imagine how it can happen without similar experiences.
23
Beat me to the punch. This is how I feel about casting a fly rod while standing in a river. The act becomes expansive, connected, more than oneself and one’s problems.
1
It's not "surfing" per se; it's sharing with comrades, having something in common with fellow human beings.This isn't easy to find.
More importantly, too few appreciate the value of good health. We take for granted what we have, until it's gone.
20
Ms. Ellis got it exactly right. Aloha.
31
I think another central element to this piece is the notion of gatekeeping - that is, the idea, and question, as to who gets to hold the keys to let anyone into any particular in-group.
As a former youth skateboarder, I was protective about separating who was just wearing the branded clothes (posers), from who was actually skating (skaters). It all seems a little juvenile in hindsight.
However, as an adult, I find this question of credibility/gatekeeping comes up in many areas where expert status can be self conferred. Who is a “real” sports fan, who is an artist, or even an expert on a given topic? It’s all pretty opaque.
My current position is very liberal, gatekeeping is for the insecure identities of the world, and anyone who skateboards is a skateboarder, anyone who makes art is an artist, and anyone who studies a give topic with breadth and depth could be an expert in a topic.
But, what are the criteria to parse quality within a given affinity? Well, I guess that will be discussed at the next grouping meeting, now if only I knew just when and where that meeting will be held, I’d be happy to come around to discuss it.
15
RIP Ms. Avery.
You've stumbled upon an idealized version of sitting in the line-up. Comradery and peace can and do exist, on the right day, or with the right friends. It truly is magical and worthy of a life style.
It can be/is also a chess match.
Positioning oneself to be in the right place amongst shifting tide, current and wave angles incoming; one can't be too far out, too inside etc. You must paddle into the wave, matching trajectory and speed, unless you can pop and drop down the face. Fail to achieve the correct timing results in failure. Sometimes that is just a chuckle and an oh well. Other times it is a lung busting hold down of multiple sets. Yes, reefs, boards, bodies do leave cuts and concussions. It is a physical effort. Enjoyably so. Risk and reward.
Of course much depends upon whom you are out with. Friends tend to share. A relaxed local leads to a give and take. Crowded, competitive, sparse hunting grounds leads to taking greater risks and jostling. Sometimes to words and physical actions against a rival or kook making a mistake that someone takes umbrage at or upon. There is often a hierarchy and a pecking order. Actual talent tends to give one more chances at scoring. Ego's at work. Pro & con.
It is/can be a chess match.
But floating in saltwater, bathed in the coastal ozone, watching the sunset, it does addict one.
Like an addiction, sometimes a complete break is needed so one doesn't get pangs and regrets.
A former surfer.
15
There is no such thing as a “former surfer”.
You may not be surfing today but judging by your note, you were, are, and will always be a surfer.
1
@Dobbys sock
"If you don't surf, you never did."
I love surfing and I love people who love surfing. Remember: every wave is a precious gift...appreciate each one.
13
What a moving piece. I've met many surfers like Ms. Ellis describes. One, now in his 70s and a regular where I've surfed many years, is beginning to slow down, not quite catching waves like he used to. He talks to me about it sometimes. It's not so easy to let go. Still, like all of us, he paddles out against a beach break that can be tough sometimes, sits out on the line, and maybe catches a few. And he takes in calm the comes from facing the horizon, waiting for sets to roll in. He's a true surfer.
25
Ms. Avery's determination to make the most of life in part by closely observing her fellow human beings and then sharing her discoveries with readers has not least of all produced a fine testament to her strength of character and an outspoken challenge the vast majority of us who allow obstacles (however serious) to keep us from making the most of our opportunities.
17
Most avid surfers here go out and float on their boards even when it’s flat. I’m not sure there is any, deeper meaning in that other than they like the company of their friends and the feel of the water. Surfing is a sensory experience, but also very social. It’s dead competitive when the waves are up, but otherwise it’s friendship and floating.
11
I knew Ellis Avery and was astonished and also comforted to see her byline here, since she passed earlier this year.
I recommend New Yorkers to take a look at her book The Smoke Week, about her experience here in the days after 9/11.
All of us in her sisterhood of Bryn Mawr College alumnae miss her so.
47
I was about to write a note to the writer telling her/him this was the best most flowing piece of writing--- it held me captivated - then I learned from her bio after the article that she died. So sad. RIP Ellis Avery.
26
To do something at peak performance might take years of preparation for hours, minutes, or seconds of top achievement. Look at rowing in the Olympics. Years of hard work for 6 minutes on the water. But that is life.
8
I thought the same thing while reading about rowing.
3
Similar but not the same; the years of hard work ie practice are mostly spent on the water rowing, just not in competition. In surfing, whether in or out of competition, you’re mostly paddling, duck diving or waiting for a wave.
3
I grew up surfing in southern California. College and a career took me away from surfing but after a 40 year hiatus, I have returned to this very Zen-like sport when my wife and I retired to the island of Maui. Here, whole families go to the beach for the day on a weekend for surfing and socializing. I regularly surf with 70-year old guys and gals, 10-year old kids and all ages in between. Talking story with friends while bobbing around waiting for a wave is an ingrained part of life here.
22
No, not true. We DO regret all that time not spent actually surfing.
13
I don't surf, but I'd love to see a surfer in the White House: Tulsi Gabbard.
Maybe surfing is why she seems so cool, calm, collected and clear headed.
21
@BruceM Yup. Her head is in the right place. Too bad the media doesn't take her seriously enough. But that would be outside of their superficial narratie about their job, the country, and politics.
2
What a great outlook you have and life lesson you offered. I spent 5 years earning a masters degree going to night school while working, and graduated with honors at age 52. I never used the degree professionally. But earning it, all those study hours, driving, long days, were not a waste. That work is who I am. A bigger paycheck would have been nice validation but certainly not necessary.
14
I have arthritis. I think I’ll try surfing again. You don’t stand on the board that long. Anyway, the best time I ever had was using inflatable canvas and styrofoam off of Destin in the 60s, with a hurricane offshore. At that point, I could have won any contest!hands down. I was master of the waves!
5
As a lifelong surfer and survivor of "serious, vicious , aggressive" cancer, lifelong surfing kept me alive during my ordeal. I never stopped surfing after surgery and the chemo, radiation etc. The doctors said that because I had been so fit from surfing, I made it.
I'll try and explain it for those who don't surf or who didn't pay much attention in science class. Waves are created by storms created hundreds, sometimes thousand of miles away. = Potential
energy. When the waves encounter a sand bar, reef or point, that energy turns to kinetic energy. If you happen to be standing on a wave during that energy transfer, it goes right through you to your core and the resultant thrill stays with you the rest of your life.
130
@MD: I can totally relate. Good for you. I’ve had cancer too.
2
Surfers are a unique bunch where waves and "patience" reign supreme. Never lose interest watching these guys by the hours surf from small beach surfing sites like Pacifica, California and Santa Cruz to the ginormous waves around the Oahu Honolulu beaches.
13
Having broken both legs in a head-on car accident years ago, I know how she felt with "This is not the real me..." And wondering if, when, and how, you will walk again.
It is in these times that the mind takes us to places of salvation...we struggle every day but in our minds we create scenarios of hope, healing, and ascension. We believe, because we must, in the possibility of living fully in joy.
I trust Ms. Avery saw her dreams of bliss manifested beyond the struggles and limitations she faced here on earth.
31
Surf or Die! I think it was a song—
2
Out of 100’s of summer residents, l, and another resident, are the only open water ocean swimmers here. If it wasn’t for my childhood polio, l never would have taken up swimming..
16
Surfers are discovered, since the ability to do all the things that surfing requires are in the person to start with. Fine tuned, sure. Actually recognized traits and spirit within rather than something elusive and that you just can't put your finger on.
But this is of course amplified by the movies and TV shows and books about surfing and making it so desirable for those of us who have trouble walking a straight line, or now in advancing age and pain in the back and hips that will forever keep us from even trying.
But there are other oceans out there, such as peaceful woods and meadows for those lucky enough to live far far from the ever expanding big cities, or dark skies if you are fortunate to be away from light pollution which didn't exist a hundred years ago, staring into the vast night sky and hearing the animals who thrive in the night.
If we only will stop and appreciate those things, we all can have the surfing experience. We need to teach our children, from their first memories, about the inner need to do those things, to be kind to our Mother Earth, and to allow others who see life differently to have their own path, but then gently insist upon ours.
Peace.
36
As much as you need to be patient and learn from your mistakes, surfing is a state of mind.
There’s a lot of hit or miss and there will be accidents and some bleeding along the way. They’ll be days with nary a wave all morning.
Wouldn’t have traded it for the world.
13
Surfing is a very different thing. It's dynamic. Always changing. Even sitting in the same spot. You can't compete with the ocean. Can't out-muscle it. Can't impose your will on it. Can't control it. You have to learn to work with it. To recognize what it's willing to give you and when you can have it. And more importantly, to appreciate it. To treasure each moment for that moment may never come again. THAT, is the surfer's secret to happiness.
57
Wow. This is very powerful. It reminds me of Michael Jordan emphasizing his missed shots. Or the fact that successful baseball players are only successful about 30 percent of the time. They still love playing the game.
14
Living in NCalifornia have always known neighbors and friends that are "serious" surfers. My husband's nephew was raised in San Diego and transplanted to Hawaii for the ability to surf after his day job. Have found these guys and gals to be seriously disciplined, calm, laid back, easy going, and the patience of a saint.
A surfer can not control mother earth and the waves and realizes there is a much greater force in the world than man and they simply roll with the tide.
61
"You can learn alot from surfing. Riding the waves can teach you about the ebb and flow of life itself."
"You see how the water falls back down from the shore, just before the next wave comes in...then it crests, and surges forward?"
"I think there's a deeper meaning in that."
8
You can’t actually surf the wave unless you really work at all of the other things. That’s the beauty of the sport; it’s difficult, fleeting but so satisfying.
11
This piece reminds me of something I read about Walter Cronkite. He caught hold of something he found some success with, and he rode it for all it was worth, like a surfer riding a wave. Early in his career he was assigned to cover the atomic bomb test in Nevada. He described the blast over the radio, and continued, extended his broadcast, finding his voice. That was a key step in advancing his career.
6
I have loved the ocean, walking alongside and especially swimming, my whole life. When I am in the water all of my senses are alive. If I am worried about something any time I can picture sitting at waves' edge digging as if I were a five year old. As long as you can sea and hear the waves you are OK.
I was so very sad to find out that Ms. Avery had died in February, I was looking forward to more of her thoughts and feelings. I hope I can find peace as she did.
23
I learned to surf in the military at Camp Pendleton. Initially, the idea of riding a wave and then actually riding a wave take over and when “out there”, nothing else is “surfing”. Eventually, it hits you that your ocean is a fairly big place and that, there’s no traffic and nobody that you have to talk to and, if you listen, it’s quiet. I’m old now and haven’t seen an ocean in decades. Everybody has an ocean nearby, if you only look for it. I found a local “ocean” at my golf club. The practice green is located inconveniently and there’s seldom anybody else, except me, there. For all the same reasons, it’s perfect!
14
@JRB
I'm a lifelong skateboarder, my ocean is the pavement...and there's certainly a sea of concrete, everywhere I go.
"Surfs up!"
11
It seems to me that Ms. Avery was speaking of discovering our need to pay as much attention during the boring bits of life–the drudgery of preparatory work–as we do during the ecstatic highlights of work's rewards.
All with the same equanimity.
All attention can be a kind of reward–in itself.
26
I think William Finnegan, who wrote the best book I've ever read on surfing, "Barbarian Days: A Surfing Life," would love Ms. Avery's beautiful, poetic words.
I'm betting she's been catching some pretty fantastic waves in her afterlife. Hope so!
54
Surfers know there will be many times they can't have a wave. There's no swell, winds are onshore, the banks are wrong. Doesn't matter when you know there will be another ride in the not too distant future.
And then, as we say, only a surfer knows the feeling.
9
As a lifetime surfer,well past my prime, I tell you that is how I will always identify myself.
Of course ;father,husband,friend,Captain are important but surfer is my core.
11
@NYSkip me too! i've been an ocean baby since my mother threw me in the ocean at age 2 (as she did with all my siblings - & now we're all swimmers 🏊🏼♀️ )
i've been surfing on a surfboard since 1964 (surfed on an air-inflated air mattress on my knees before I saw my first surfboard in person) & am still surfing 🏄 on surfboards 7-8 feet long very lately including a nice little swell the last 3 days - at the age of 72 & 3/4
Yes, I still identify myself as a surfer. And as Al Weisbecker said in his book 📖 In Search of Captain 👨🏻✈️ Zero - I have that positive attitude as Al expressed it 'surfers can do anything!'
3
This is a lovely piece of writing which beautifully captures the pure essence of surfing from a non-surfer's perspective. Yes surfing, like life, has it's negative elements and there are many unhappy surfers, but the reason I go to the ocean to surf is to experience bursts of peace and oneness with nature even if I'm just sitting on my board in the sun watching the crowds flow past me. And when I'm actually riding a wave that feeling is beyond words. And I'm always a surfer; even when I'm caught in traffic listening to music watching clouds float by. RIP Ellis.
31
Mr. Avery - I hope you get on a board one day. I truly do. In 1966 I surfed for the first time. It's an addiction that has followed me ever since and you are right. We spend more time searching for the right wave or a good one. Those are the ones that return feelings we can find no where else . . .
Best wishes . . . JTELLIS
1
@John Thomas Ellis
You may be interested in knowing that Ms. Avery (she passed away in February) was also quite an accomplished writer. Here is her obituary: https://www.lambdaliterary.org/features/news/02/16/ellis-avery/
4
Surfing appears so free from the outside. It’s not. My friends and I have destroyed relationships, jobs, skin, and progress in life for it. I’m a kind person who becomes filled with rage when I see a car with a few surfboards on top heading to the beach. Any surfer who has traveled 30 hours only to get dysentery and no waves will tell you, it’s a beautiful jail cell.
11
@Blake
We all have to pick a cell, might as well pick one like surfing, which keeps people healthy, humble, with friends, both comforted and challenged by nature, and includes even beginners in a brother/sisterhood unlike any other I’ve known. We have to work to live, but let’s never live to work.
5
I love a good metaphor and beautiful writing and this essay hit the mark. Never having surfed, it made me think about all that goes into surfing when one isn't actually on the board.
The essay also had me reflecting on my life the past year and a half of living with metastatic breast cancer. With chemo sapping my energy, in order to enjoy a trip to Disney World with my granddaughters I needed to rent a scooter. In the days leading up to the trip I was lamenting this option. I'm not a scooter person, I thought.
Then my sister asked, "What if you could make it fun." Like the time surfers spend in the water between rides, I scootered between rides with a granddaughter by my side. And it was a blast.
Thanks for the reminder...Life is what happens in each precious moment. Why not enjoy them all!
51
I like that Ellis found solace and inspiration in her adaptation of the surfer’s way. But her understanding of what was actually happening in and out of the water was oversimplified. She projected an idealized vision of surfing and surfers onto the riders she saw. Which is fine, especially if it helped her through hard times. But so many surfers suffer the same hardships, the same fears, the same addictions and loneliness as anybody else.
Time in the water only serves to focus a surfer on the one thing: a nice peeling wave with the pulse of nature itself driving towards the beach. Yes, the stoke from a good wave lingers, and draws surfers back to the ocean again and again. If one is open, one will see beauty and power in both the water and pursuit of the wave. Sometimes one sees it in the style and flow, or even the kindness, of another surfer. And yes, a bad day in the water is better than a good day at work.
But like anyone else, surfers are plagued by regrets—of waves missed, of time with family and friends missed, of injuries, of sessions that could not be made because of life’s complexities. If you want to understand the “inner peace” of pro surfers, watch the HBO documentary “Momentum Generation,” about Kelly Slater, Rob Machado and a dozen other riders who redefined surfing in the 1990s. They all discovered how hard-won real-life happiness is. Fleeting time on a wave is transcendent, and must be accepted for what it is: a brief escape from what awaits us on shore.
32
"You should have been here yesterday," is what surfers feel and say to each other. They hate other surfers and claim ownership of the wave and woe to him who drops in on them. It's a society of regrets. They enjoy it for a moment, but mostly they just hate traffic of other surfers and wish to be treated like the center of the universe all the time.
8
@Max And Max Nope. Very negative view. Some surfers embroiled in crowded surfing conditions may act this way but more commonly there is more hospitality & wonder & if yer lucky interesting conversations & cheering each other on when the waves are hot! Second best place to be besides riding a wave when you're in the water is down the line from the surf 🏄 rider
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@Max And Max
I'm going to hazard a guess . . . Max and Max is not a surfer.
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@Max And Max
You have obviously not spent much time around surfers. Yes, there’s surf etiquette, just like in skiing, but long time surfers love being in the water and only inconsiderate people( just like in every sport) , would act like you claim.
Powerful essay. In these crazy times its refreshing to read such eloquent work.
Life is like a wave for sure...
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I agree with much of what Ms. Avery says. But the heavenly joy that surfing instills must be understood in the context of localism's "finder's keepers" and Alpha Male ethic. Both are true.
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@Ben
Greetings Ben. I am from Colorado, however I learned to surf on the island of Kauai from '70 to '74. Suffice to say it was a tough way to learn, me being a haole on an outer island. Maybe as rough as San Diego County. Since then I have traveled throughout the world. Yes, localism is alive, as is Alpha Male behavior but somehow, I think you completely missed the point.
Aloha Bra!
Great efforts to overcome a disability and to move on with your life reflect great determination and courage. Checking your surfboard in at every airport in the world in order to experience every variety of wave is eccentric and obsessive. But if that's what floats your boat, that's cool.
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@michjas It's really about living out an 'Endless Summer', no?
Thank you Ms. Avery for a beautifully written article. I’m sorry you never got on the water but in another way you were floating on a board waiting for the next set of waves. I had a surfboard and surfed the little waves on Miami Beach. It wasn’t much but there is a happiness of being on the water and waiting for that wave to come. Yes, a lot of time was spent hanging out in the ocean. It’s therapy at its’ best. And true, the surfers I met at the beach were the nicest and happiest people. I know you are somewhere now riding in a barrel of a wave and hanging ten.
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What a beautiful piece.
I've never been a surfer. Yet, I see surfing as as such an appropriate metaphor for life: See what waves come your way-- and make the most of the ride.
Congratulations are due to Ms. Avery for catching the waves that came her way. Well done.
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@Alan R Brock....a metaphor for American life right now? Look sharp for what waves may come our way, judge them well, ride the good ones, and break away from the dangerous ones.
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Surfers don't wait for waves just anywhere. We go to the places where and when we know we'll have the best chance to catch well-formed rideable waves, all based on past experience and knowing how to read marine forecasts. So.... I'd like to respectfully suggest an addition to your nice metaphor for life that may make it even more appropriate: First learn how to be where the best waves are, see what waves come your way-- and make the most of the rides!
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Beautifully insightful writing. God bless Ms. Avery and hoping she is surfing eternal rainbows in Heaven.
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This is the most beautiful and most moving surfing piece I've ever read -- and surfing seems to inspire great writers and writing. Ellis Avery was obviously a remarkable a person and writer -- and this amazing article gives just an inkling of what the world has lost with her death. Thank you, NYT, for this series.
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@amack she was a remarkable woman, writer, scientist, and friend.
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What a smart way to work through that. Thanks for bringing this article to us.
I always admired the activity/sport for its simple elegance. Body board and ocean. Beautiful.
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Fabulous piece, Insightful and inspiring. A voice I wish we could hear more from. As a kite-surfer, I believe she distilled what is most wonderful about being part of that community. Applying that lesson to life's everyday adversity, that's the challenge and the gift.
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A beautiful insight, which captures the lives of many surfers.
But for many other surfers, other insights apply: see Nat Young’s book “Surf Rage”.
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What a wonderful article. The power of transcending suffering and finding meaning and freedom in the life we live especially in the light of the darkness that seems to permeate our world is awe inspiring. We all have our sufferings, but it is what we do with them that really counts.
A surfer floats along then needs to grab the wave. I do not surf but feel that this is what we all do as we live our lives. Freedom may lie in the awareness that we bring to situations, finding that path that lifts us out of our day to day grind.
At times we all admire surfers, their quest for the perfect wave, that sense of freedom and even the crash of defeat when that wave betrays us. But, Ellis, it seems you have found your own freedom in your quest to live a full life and that is the greatest quest of all. I know that you still suffer and sometimes put a brave face on it, but that you could write such an article as this inspires us all, perhaps more than any surfer.
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A life cut short in years but fully lived in wonder and beauty and appreciation.
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An absolutely beautiful piece of writing, capturing the essence of what it is to be a surfer.
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The words are true.
56 years of surfing has taught me a simple truth.
Surfers see more beauty than most.
It’s with you every moment,no matter what you’re doing.
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