A Generation of Widows, Raising Children Who Will Be Forged by Loss (02afghan-widows) (02afghan-widows)

Would the New York Times please publish an article explaining exactly what the United States is doing in Afghanistan, whether the ongoing presence of the United States is beneficial to the United States, and whether there is any end in sight?

The authors paint a fearful situation which is death in war. But they failed to take a hint about why they are at war and why for so long. U.S. will pass to History as a dreadful warrior nation. Germany was, but it stopped spreading death already, U.S. will continue...

When was this not the case in Afghanistan? Since the fall of the monarchy and the communist coup in 1978, Afghanistan has been in conflict within themselves and from outsiders. 40 years. Several generations and of course that effects young men disproportionately. They are always the ones to fight.

Disproportionately? Aren't young men typically the ones who get killed in war?

It’s a good thing we went to war with this country since none, I repeat none of the 9/11 highjackers were from there and we eventually found OBL in Pakistan. Well done GWB, well done.

It took you 17 years to figure out that young men are being decimated? Oh, OK...

Should women like these desire to leave the country, they should move to the front of the visa line at the U.S. Embassy.

I feel very much for these women who need to be very strong. But at the same time, this story is incomplete. Afghanistan is a Scorers Apprentice tale. In the 1970s the country was on the verge of becoming a modern state in which religion played a small role when compare to today. The came the Soviets and the US started to try and stop fire with even more fire. They invented the Mujaheddin and the Taliban and armed them despite knowing that they were creating a nightmare and a monster. They opened Pandora's box fully knowing what's inside. The Soviets are gone while Taliban as well as the Mujaheddin are still here, plus the IS and a number of factions. For the past 20 years Afghanistan has lost not only young men as fighters but also tens of thousands of young men who migrated to Europe in search of a better life, leaving their families at home instead of fighting for their homeland. This has made certain that the terrorist pest is worse than ever and woman like those pictured here are worse off than ever. So the solution to this issue is not to write articles in the NYT, which is all well and very informative, while the examples shown here are in fact well off when compared to Jane Doe outside Kabul, but to make the young men finally go back home and fight the terrorists, drive them out. If Afghanistan continues to rely on foreign aid and fighters, this story will, sooner than later, become a sweet memory just like the tale of Afghanistan in the 1970s.

Let's be clear, the source of the misery reported here are the Afganis themselves. All else is the result of their past actions. The real question here is not what Russians or the US got from this conflict, or what is the lasting value of their involvement, but rather what are the underlying forces that lead this society to retrograde into a medieval state of mind, perpetuating on themselves the miseries others would not bear elsewhere?

As a wife and a mother, I couldn’t imagine what my life are going to be without my husband. It is heartbreaking to see women lost their husbands and children lost their fathers at such a young age. It is hard to be single mothers in America, let alone in Afghanistan. What can we do to stop the killings in Afghanistan? How can we help the widows and orphans?

No commenter yet has mentioned that this threadbare country’s ragtag fighters have managed so far to defeat two superpowers: Russia and the US. Does no one remember that Russia skulked out of Afghanistan after two decades, having gained nothing and lost trillions, plus a generation of its own young men? Afghanistan is our latest Vietnam. We keep pouring money and resources into another land war that we cannot win. Why? Because of access to oil? Or control of a pipeline to carry that oil? Supporting a nineteenth-century technology instead of investing in alternative forms of power? I’m not saying that backing away from oil would solve Afghanistan’s war problems or its political struggles. I have no clue how to manage this conflict. But neither does the US military. And neither did Russia. Is China up next? Just asking. I have no love for the taliban. I have no confidence in the US military to help turn this conflict around. Nor have I suggestions about managing a pullout which I think is necessary, although unlikely under the current administration. I subscribe to the idea that the more a society represses its women, the poorer and more backward it is. My heart aches for the plight of these young and vulnerable afghani widows. This is an untenable situation, as is true of all societies in armed conflict. The only sure outcome is human misery.

Didn’t Russia invade and fight in Afghanistan for 20 years and finally leave? If the Russian army could not win a war in Afghanistan after 20 years, why didn’t the US learn from Russia’s experience? Pure hubris.

If women can receive educations and reliable birth control in this part of the world, their lives will be much improved. Clearly, we Americans have accomplished very little in 20 years expending lives and treasure. I hope these women can lead independent lives and raise their families.

I'm more concerned about our citizens here in the U.S. those people know of nothing but war and refuse to change the situation.

What's happening there is tragic, but let's not forget these people have been slaughtering each other since the 1970s when the king was overthrown. Many locals aided the invading Soviet forces and then kept killing each other after the Soviets left. Pakistan had over 2 million refugees while the Taliban ruled. Afghanistan has produced widows, orphans and heroin for decades.

It sounds like the US after World War II. We had almost 400,000 war deaths, almost all men.

Americans won the Afghan War in the first 5 weeks. The other 18 years has been to fill the war profiteers pockets with our tax dollars. Heroin flooding our street while 80% of all opium comes from the country we have occupied for 18 years. Enough of this insanity.

Dedicated to the children of Afghanistan in 2001; heart heavy then, heart heavier now: WASHING RICE Washing rice An unexpected roll of thunder roots in my feet travels upward and plants itself vibrato in my heart, My babies run to me, cling to my legs for shelter, and I wonder, what of the children in Afghanistan tonight?

Thank you for sharing these women's stories and describing the unseen, lasting devastation of war. Other than supporting charities like Women for Women International, it's hard to know how to channel my desire to help. How do we respond to this a nation? As Christians? Our politicians avoid talking about Afghanistan. In the midterm elections, I don't recall hearing a whisper of our involvement. And never do I hear comment of the toll this war has on the Afghan people. And yet the conflict rages on: buildings bombed, death tolls rise, soldiers and police continue to be "trained" to fight. Innocently, women and children live the burden. How can we help as a nation? I'm not sure, but think we've lost sight of asking this hard question.

I have to echo the other comments. The way this piece is framed one would think that young men dying in high numbers in war was unique to this conflagration. Yes, this is sad, yes we should all have empathy for the human suffering, and yes I am against our fighting any of these wars. However, the phenomenon of war widows is not new or unique here which is inferred by the introduction.

From the title, I thought this article might write about War Widows in America. Every day, we are bombarded with the public displays of honor for our “ veterans, safety officers, active and retired military “ and never a word about our own War Orphans. Thousands of women ( and a few men) are left alone to raise War Orphans in USA and no one writes about that.

Thanks for this thoughtful reminder of the people of Afghanistan, too often forgotten in the daily drumbeat of casualties by the western media. Too often - about the western forces' casualties, as well. The consequences for the Afghan women and their children left behind need a wider story of support. Support that doesn't always come from their Government. Support for Afghan women and children in their times of war and civil unrest. Please.

Except for the specific Muslim details about passing on widows this exact scenario has been played out since time immemorial. The young have always been used as fodder in conflicts. The problem is not Afghanistan VS whoever or the US VS whoever. The problem is conflict resolution without violent responses. A HU problem since few other higher primate species resort to wars. Until someone figures out how to do that on a global scale war will be a money maker, kids will die in it, widows will bear the brunt of sacrifice, and all of the psycho-social problems associated with war and it's result will continue. Good to see active duty and vets contributing to this because there is a lot of misinformation about all conflicts and sometimes it takes people who were/are there to educate people.

Perhaps these people should stop cursing and shooting at the Americans - those people that saved them from the Soviets and later the Taliban. Maybe it's time to try to be a bit more like America, seeing as how they all want to move there. Maybe it's time to stop venerating a warlord and harboring international terrorists, seeing how well that's been working out. And maybe it's time that we help the Afghans to live alone with each other, given how unwilling and incapable they are of doing any of the above.

How can I contact this woman?

The US is causing this war and does any American citizen know why? Yes al Qaida hung out in caves in Afghanistan 20 years ago. They no longer do. The US wars in Afghanistan and Iraq have promoted nothing but senseless chaos and tragedy with no actual achievable goals. When will this madness end????

Why would it be more noteworthy or heartbreaking when Afghan women become widows when their children are 2, 3, or 5 than when we American women experience the same thing? It hasn’t been any easier for me to raise 2 daughters who barely remember their father from ages 2 and 5, when he was struck down by cancer.

We, the most evil country in the 21st century is responsible for this senseless slaughter and we continue with our nefarious behavior. We must be stopped.

"The war in Afghanistan is disproportionately killing young men" -Isn't that true of most wars? It's the young men who get sent out to be killed and maimed.

How can we win an Afghan Civil War for our Afghani allies that we do not intend to police? The bloodletting will never end as long as we police only one side’s tactical advantage, but not it’s inevitable corruption. How does any foreign country “win” a Civil War anywhere, much less win one in a country bordering countries, Iran, Pakistan, and the former Soviet Republics, that do not want to see the conflict end for they are supporting our side’s adversaries? Had only Pres. Obama not lied during his 1st campaign when he promised to withdraw our troops in his first year in office, our military withdrawal 10 years ago would have saved countless Afghani lives. Our efforts to pacify Afghanistan since during the Trump administration have only led to more Afghani civilians killed than American and allied troops. With peace unlikely, our troops are merely backup while the last Afghanis we have trained to fight the Taliban are killed. If we do not intend to do more than oversee the fighting, except now and then, we ought to withdraw. The war could bankrupt us.

One small thing we can all do- don't vote for another candidate of any party unless that person says- No more war.

Even though death and destruction stayed overseas, the four years at war during WWII had a profound effect on the US. Consider how much more severely the decades of continued death and destruction will wound and scar generations of Afghans.

The war in Afghanistan has been devastating for the country and it's citizens...it's a tragedy on a scale which is difficult to imagine. However, we have caused much of what is happening in the war torn country. Seventeen years, a trillion dollars, over 2,000 American soldiers dead, and an innocent population left to pick up the pieces. We need to end the war - the Taliban just killed 3 more Americans last week - they planted a roadside bomb. The control the opium trade and take in $1 billion yearly - they employ over 30,000 Afghans to grow and harvest poppy and manufacture opium. They have been there for the last 17 and will be there for the next 17. I heard a general from the Pentagon trying to justify peace talks with the Taliban - those terrorists, they've made complete fools of our military. It was a painful interview to listen to - actually it was disgusting. The Pentagon and our military have completely lost touch with reality. The US needs to stop the war now and bring home ALL troops. We have over 11 million single parents in the US taking care of over 23 million children - 10% live in poverty, lacking property nutrition, healthcare and education - in our largest cities. While my heart goes out to the Afghans, we need to take care and help our own here in America.

lovely girls - be different - be special - be unique - be the ones that change Afghanistan for good !

I am not sure if the victims in these photos understood the magnitude of their consent to share their private moments of tragedy and misery with the wider world. As is the case with so many other such reports from Afghanistan that epitomize the scope of an unspeakable issue, this one will, just by the end of the weekend, get filed away as yet another “tragedy porn.”

Can the people bound by this culture recognize that their members could thrive if they freed women? If women could work, drive, go out in public without the body bags, their country could thrive. Grow. Increase lifespans. Realize potential and leverage creative impulses, half of which go muffled now. Won’t happen.

A sad situation but you would think that after the US and NATO have poured billions of dollars into Afghanistan's security forces and military over the past fifteen years the Taliban would have long since been defeated. a first rate military organization of up to battalion size should have been achieved years ago but it's not there. A combination of corruption, lack of will and the attitude of letting the west take charge has resulted in a failed security apparatus. There's no hope for Afghanistan so it's time for us to leave

This situation is not unprecedented. Post WWI France, and for that matter, most of Western Europe fell into this consequence. In the PBS documentary The Great War, I remember hearing that in France, almost no men between the ages of 17 and 45 that weren't already married and survived WWI were available to women who were now widows or wanted a husband. Makes me wonder if any sociologists studied the impact on children born in France during and just before WWI.

Heartbreaking. And it tears me up to think that there was no reason for us to do an invasion of Afghanistan. The Taliban did not organize Sept. 11. Their rule was harsh and unWestern, but we have not toppled Saudi Arabia for its harsh and unWestern rule. We should have pushed for Bin Laden's arrest (and given the Taliban enough proof for them to see why we wanted him) and, as a last resort, done and in-and-out mission just to retrieve Bin Laden. But we should not have invaded. All we did and have continued to do is ignite regional instability--and when we leave, we will leave a new vacuum as nasty as the vacuum that the Taliban were trying to fill after the Soviet's left. So shameful that we Americans have come so far with our technology and still have no skill in fostering peace.