I would not feel in any way responsible to give an elderly klansman or an Incel member a ride to the polls. So I'd feel no real difference in not giving a Trump supporter a ride.
46
This is @SocialQPhilip, the author of the SocialQ's column. logged in on my husband's computer. (I can't get my password to work.) The way we "win" (in many senses) in our constitutional democracy is to encourage as many people as we we can to vote FOR something, not hinder anyone FROM voting. And in my heart, refusing a ride to a dear old friend of my parents, whom I've known all my life, when I am driving to the same polling place, is more akin to hindrance. But sadly, SocialQ's is not the law of the land -- so others will follow their own hearts.
44
If you think Trump lost or never had a moral compass, I strongly suggest you reflect on what happened to your moral compass. Refusing to help a life-long neighbor, friend, and elderly person is truly selfish and unkind. Read the article in today’s NYT about Obama’s recent speech and see if this helps you rethink your position.
13
An old family friend asks for a ride to polls.
With the death of John McCain, people across the political spectrum grieved for him as a representative of a lost ability to cross party lines. Especially for something as basic as the right to vote.
Remember when someone called Obama a foreigner, a Muslim, and McCain--running against him--said no, he's a good family man.
In that spirit, give your neighbor a ride to the polls.
35
Couldn’t disagree more with answer to LW 1. There is no moral or civil obligation to help a neighbor to the polls, especially when that neighbor supports an administration / party that is ripping our country apart and causing irreparable damage daily. Indeed, I think you have an obligation not to drive her. That’s not interfering with her rights just not enabling her. There are plenty of alternative ways for her to get to the polls ( Lyft, volunteer groups, public transport). Indeed, forget dinner, you need feel no obligation to have anything other that the minimum civil contact with this person who has cast herself on the wrong side of history .
46
About being compelled to offer a ride: the Republican party no doubt has an office nearby, with all kinds of volunteers to drive voters to the polls. It would be kind to research this, and pass this information along to your Republican neighbor. I disagree with the advice that not to offer a ride to someone whose intent is to damage the policies and principles about which you and your family care is a shocking cruelty. She put the signs on her lawn, so let those who agree with her see that she gets to the polls. She can also vote by absentee ballot.
56
Dinner talk - When she starts asking her nosy questions simply ask, "Why do you need to know." This was Dear Abby's mother's advise. It will leave her nothing to say but, " I am nosy." End of conversation.
64
@S.L. That should have been "advice".
4
Why is the Rosh Hashanah dinner different from all other meals? Because it is a celebration of the New Year while seders commemorate the story of Passover.
36
"It seems from your lawn signs that you are likely to vote in a way that would hurt LGBTQ people. I support and respect your right to vote as your wish, but I am afraid that I cannot help you harm my son."
"It seems from your lawn signs that you intend to vote for a candidate who espouses white supremacy. I respect your right to vote, but I must refuse to help you harm people of color."
69
As long as they are supporting those kinds of candidates, not just normal conservative/Republicans.
2
Allow me to be the first to add my appreciation for Mr. Galanes's gentle upbraiding of LW #1, D. W. This is not the time nor the place to play at being a political zealot. What would this guy's parents say about his marginalizing an elderly woman and long-time family friend for her political beliefs? Intolerance is intolerance, no matter how one attempts to justify it.
41
Would the author also suggest that the neighbor drive this person to the schoolyard so that they may abuse children? You are under no obligation to help someone destroy the country.
43
Voting is a right; abusing school children is not. Making it easier for someone to exercise that right is American. Especially if you don’t agree with them.
It never hurts to be a nicer person. :-)
38
Vote by mail is available in most states. I do not waste my time on Faux viewers, especially the elderly. Dementia combined with brainwashing are a mountain I personally refuse to climb.
34
"...a great business opportunity." LOL Pay back the loan to your brother.
128
I agree that a friendly approach to people with opposing politics - including politics that might directly hurt our interests or even deny us equal treatment before the law - might be productive. A dinner invitation is a good idea.
However, the statement that, by refusing to give the neighbor a ride, D.W. would be in league with people who fight to suppress voting rights, is absurd. There is no constitutional right to commandeering your neighbor's car. There is one for voting.
Other than that, yes, invite the person over for dinner. Show them your perspective and how your family is affected by the policies they advocate for. Listen to their fears. I suspect that little might come out of this, but it's worth trying (If it doesn't work out, they might be embarrassed to ask for a ride next time, saving you the dilemma).
37
I agree with the author's point on giving a conservative a ride to the polls, but I don't think it goes far enough. If you have agreed to take a neighbor to the polls who is going to vote to do damage to the community, you have a responsibility to also take several other people (low-income, minority, and/or college students) to the polls - preferably at the same time.
46
As long as those others vote the way you want them to. ??
7
While the dinner is a great idea, I disagree that the writer has an obligation to help anyone vote. There is a difference between a systemic attempt to repress the vote by politicians and an individual's choice to not help the opposition. If she's infirm enough to not be able to get to the polling place on her own, then she's eligible for an absentee ballot and can arrange that herself.
64
It is part of the systematic repression of the vote in this country, because we make it difficult for the elderly, disabled, or people without access to transportation to vote. Many such people depend on friends to get to the polls. She might not have figured out absentee ballots and that’s something else she could be helped with. In any case, it seems terribly petty not to help someone to the polls because you don’t like the way they vote. It’s certainly not going to bring down the presidency one day sooner.
24
@Jennie You make a good point. In addition, "D.W." was quite guarded in the initial question. We don't actually know if the neighbor is ignorant of the absentee ballot process, or even if she plans to vote in the upcoming election. This question is more hypothetical than I like to see. I don't place a lot of trust in a published answer which resulted from this sort of incomplete question.
2