Conversely I've seen nasty people excused because of "hormones" when in reality they just possess a rotten personality.
1
The word "hormonal" is usually used in a somewhat negative manner in order to explain or justify the sudden aggressive behavior that many women display at certain times of the month. Is there another more acceptable word?
1
It only takes a major disruption in ones hormones to see just how critical they are in shaping our emotional state. Even more interesting is to see the changes in someone who starts to transition from one gender to the other using hormonal therapy. It will leave you wondering just who we are without them.
2
Of course men are hormonal. That's why the majority of violence, murder, road rage, mass shootings...it's a long list...are the work of men. Men with a strong female side, the ones women note are not typical men, do not descend to such unnecessary, inexcusable behavior. Men have a hell of a lot more to answer for than women in this regard. Hormonal is simply no excuse for their behaviors.
Eclectic Pragmatism — http://eclectic-pragmatist.tumblr.com/
Eclectic Pragmatist — https://medium.com/eclectic-pragmatism
2
Having hormones is a medical fact.
"Being hormonal" is something applied only to women, and often enough in response to them acting like men do all the time - standing up for themselves, being angry with being dismissed or being pushed around.
There are real effects of hormones, and they do sometimes make all of us, men and women, act in ways that are not entirely rational or correct. But when that is handled not as a medical diagnosis, but as a reason to dismiss only one gender's concerns - that's sexism, not hormones.
8
I've never read it, but my all-time favorite book title is "Love Conquers Nothing: A Glandular History of Civilization" by Emily Hahn.
2
Rather than give examples of behavior and attempt to draw conclusions, that is, rather than making any claims at all, I would like to mention an article I read - perhaps in the NYT some months ago - about the successive stages of hormonal release during the "typical" woman's monthly menstrual cycle.
This really shocked me because of all the different pushes and pulls of various hormones and the reactions to them which women confront. Why is this information not presented and discussed in high schools or junior high schools?
This information is significant to an informed understanding of both female and male biology which then becomes interpreted differently in so many different cultural contexts.
How sad that we are kept so ignorant.
1
"But the link isn’t clear-cut. A review of PMS studies published in Gender Medicine in 2012 found that nearly 40 percent of 47 studies did not show a tie between periods and bad moods."
So the majority of the studies (60%) DID show a correlation between menstruation and bad mood...
6
Our population is scientifically-illiterate. I believe that this is the point the author attempts to make. The article is the stuff of basic endocrine physiology, updated for 2018. How about this: rather than make college kids take survey classes in bio, which are too simplistic to scratch the surface of information they need to function in the 21st century, let’s afford them the opportunity to take undergrad endocrine physiology? More important than photosynthesis or the Krebs cycle to their daily lives. ( Full disclosure:I have a PhD in a scientific discipline. And I am interested in bringing millennials along who do not care to be scientists, ASAP. We all win.)
3
Hormonal is a euphemism. A pretty good one at that. I guess I could tell my wife next month, "you're experiencing fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone." But that just seems weird.
1
But when you are being over the top ragey and tempermental - does she ever call you hormonal and dismiss your concerns as just being about hormones? Or even mention you're having fluctuations in testosterone?
If not - then there is a sexist component there.
4
Estrogen supplementation during menopause and peri menopause does preserve a more youthful appearance. So the 1930 era
statement was accurate in some particulars. While the extended thinking was very culturally inflected it does not mean that he was wrong about estrogen being a great youth drug. It might give you cancer we know. But I think the modern emphasis on "the shortest possible amount of time " to use it deprives a lot of women of quality of life. It is not just that it preserves a youthful appearance but it also results in more youthful sexual functioning.
6
Wonderful article !! I so wish that more articles concerning human interactions were science / fact / research based referencing how our internal workings (eg hormonal chemistry), often beyond our mindful understanding or control, is behaviorally expressed.
Dr. Epstein's last sentence negates her entire article. Of course, hormones do not make u stupid, but they certainly DO alter judgment. Hormones and their imbalances palpably affect our choices in deciding a course of action, like whether or not to agree to a blood test.
6
Thank you for this article. It was long overdue and we need many more. It boils down to stop blaming hormones for people's behavior. Do not use hormones as a justification or as an excuse.
When women get angry, many are quick to dismiss their anger blaming their periods. As Dr. Hutter Epstein experienced, her anger was the result of an abusive doctor, not her hormones. When I get angry at mu husband, it is because of something he did (or did not do) not because of my hormones. Similarly, when men rape and kill, their testosterone levels are no excuse for it.
In short, many people use hormones to demean women and justify men's (usually bad) actions. This needs to change.
11
Interesting word - harmonal! In my 88 years it is the first time I have seen it in print. Is it a word used only in the Doctor/medical community. If so why would the article appear in the op-ed pages od the NYT?
One begins to recognize that the depth and breadth of journalism/writings haven't been this expansive in over 50 years. Any suggestions as to specific causes besides the obvious one -the president and his minions?
I am married to a woman. once a month she is hormonal. This will be true no matter what kind of brainwashing you attempt on the populace.
8
And I am married to a man who is hormonal an average of 4 weeks every month.
14
It is most amazing to me the vast difference in number of "recommends" between the Readers Picks and NYTs Picks, especially when dealing with "women's issues" or "women's behaviors". Perhaps the NYTs needs to look at itself long and hard and realize the perpetuation of their disconnect with their readership will ultimately destroy NYTs credibility and readership. Not sure how much longer I can subscribe ... wake up or lose your long-standing audience! Give a voice to women! Give a voice to Democratic principles and Democrats running for office!!. STOP reporting only on Trump; stop reporting on him and giving him a voice!! HELP PROTECT DEMOCRACY! ENOUGH!
1
Hope the book is better than the column.
8
To suggest that there is not a link between a women's menstrual cycle and her emotions does a huge disservice to women and men. In my own family my mother, my wife and my daughter have all had to deal with the challenge that PMS poses -- both the physical pain and the difficulty that hormonal changes created for them in managing anger or the way that it triggered depression. In my teaching and advising experience with middle schoolers I've had girls who predictably have fights with friends and difficulty focusing in class on a predictable monthly basis that they recognize and report as being related to their menstrual cycles. It is appropriate for all of us to recognize and respect that normal body rhythms can affect women so that we are all sympathetic to each other. At the same time, no one (man or woman) should ever label someone's else's pain or anger as hormonal -- that is something we can't know and its demeaning to assume it.
6
What about the men of your family? They never got "hormonal" or depressed at regular intervals? What about your male students? Did you ever care to check if boys predictably got into fights with friends and had difficulty focusing in class? Because women have an evident manifestation of hormonal changes in the form of a menstrual period does not mean that men do not go through the same changes. Much easier, but not fair, to focus attention on females just because males do not have a period.
11
"Period!" says it all.
There may be fluctuations in testosteron but compared to estrogen-progesteron they are basically invisible.
In other words, Epstein's article is politics and ideaology, not medicine or biology.
One of the best comments my husband ever made (and he’s an endocrinologist) is to point out that all men are “always” premenstrual in the sense that they are always lacking those moderating hormones. I’ve never looked at men the same way since.
18
Please read my comment about being a DES son. Your husband, the Endocrinologist, might find it of interest, too.
2
Randi, thanks for the article. Stanford neuroscientist Robert Sapolsky has studied the effect of stress hormones on our primate cousins and found that stress hormones have a tremendous impact on health.
He has further suggested that stress among primates is a thinking, social process; thus, calling into question the degree to which we have free will.
In his studies, the alpha male creates stress among other males in a population; thus, further suggesting that if there is an issue with "hormonal" behavior, that it also affects men, and causes many health issues.
3
After reading this column and many of the comments, I wonder why we just don't call everyone hormonal. The rational/irrational dichotomy could then be applied to anyone who is perceived to be out on the extremes of the Bell curve, without using the pejorative "hormonal". Problem solved.
Then someone can write a column about why we shouldn't use the word "irrational".
2
The language police again?!? Please...can't we stop already?
Language police...please try to concentrate on the false. Not on the true but inconvenient.
Hormones definitely alter moods - men and women. I experience roid rage every time I have been diagnosed prednisone...enough so that I have learned to avoid situations that might provoke anger responses when taking.
I am also very sensitive to insulin vs. blood sugar. This impacts my mood and judgement.
My wife knows this - it's something we openly discuss, and adjust for. As we have her sharp mood sensitivities, both pre and post menopause. Back in the day, once a month, it was "tread lightly, give a little extra rope" time. She was the first to bring it up, especially when I would lose sight of the time.
And the impact isn't merely "more chocolate, and another wine - NOW!"
Sticking our heads in the sand doesn't make it untrue. We all have better, and worse, days. If hormone variances can reasonably predict some of this, it justs helps us all adjust, both to ourselves and to each others.
2
the difference between individuals is huge, and much more significant than the difference between the "average" woman and the "average" man.
the word is used as a disdainful insult, meant only to diminish the target. it only reflects the ignorance and impotence of the user. that a medical doctor would use it reflects lack of empathy, character, judgment, training, and supervision.
8
On one hand, I can absolutely see how a word like "hormonal" -- just like "shrill" and so many other coded words/terms -- could be used as a pejorative, a mentally lazy way to put a woman you disagree with in an easy-to-dismiss box, a straight-up sexist term to diminish a woman's thoughts/feelings/behaviors, or some combination thereof.
On the other, the term is often used colloquially to describe certain events that women go through and behaviors they emit. Without getting too crass or prescriptive, the mood swings many women suffer during menopause are just one example of this idea.
Like a lot of words, the context/biases/preconceived notions powering the usage is more important than tone-deaf dismissal. Intent matters.
Enough already!
Yes, it’s well-known that women have drawn the short straw since humans have existed. But what is the purpose of this editorial? To remove what’s become a metaphor—used thusly by both men and women—from our speech?
I just can’t keep up with all of this. I’m a male and a feminist since I was about 15 years-old. I’m all for equal pay, and every other equality issue for women you care to name. But you’re losing me. You’re losing me because there’s going to come a time when it’s simply over-the-top complaining and no longer meaningful.
1
You don't have to call it hormonal that women care more about some things than men. They will many times make a decision that men will seldom do, and do it to their own determent.
Most women I know would say women are more moody than men. Not just more emotional. Some even say that for this reason they prefer to have a make boss. If I were to write your article, I would write about how it’s OK to be hormonal. But not try to deny that different hormones have different manifestations, some of which are more associated with one gender than another. And one of these manifestations is moodiness. I’m sorry if you don’t like this reality, but i think you’ll need to blame evolution if you don’t like it.
1
Dr, Epstein's argument would seem to be with the English language and not her medical colleagues. Thus in the OED:
1.1 informal -Affected by one's sex hormones, especially so as to feel moody or easily aroused.--note that it does not refer to women.
And it appears in relation to men:
"There is also the matter of hormonal changes that occur as men get older.
"Times, Sunday Times (2016)" (UK)
As long as this is proper usage in English, and I checked mostly dictionaries of British English, after all the story began in London, then Dr. Epstein can expect her request to be ignored. As I wrote, men can also be "hormonal".
3
The irony of men calling women hormonal is priceless. And likely because men being hormonal - as in fueled with testosterone - is so normal that the lack would be remarkable. Look at the havoc testosterone fueled men cause; way overdue to get rid of that old emotional/hormonal woman canard and put the spotlight where it belongs.
9
So good -- thanks for this insightful piece!
1
During the 1980's OPEC jacked up oil prices and heating oil in New England skyrocketed. To counter it we set our thermostats to 55 at night. Cold as can be in the dead of winter, but coincidentally my beautiful wife was going through menopause.
Needless to say sleeping in that cold room at night was just fine, I had a furnace next to me! There are plusses to these hormones, it's just all about timing.
I learned early in our marriage of 54 years that my wife was a whole lot smarter and could talk circles around me. Heck, hormonal wasn't even in my vocabulary. It was just that my better half was different at times, and I just chalked it up to....i haven't a clue and I'm not going to say anything.
Viva la difference.
1
I am a man in my 60s and got hormonal reading this piece. It is a focus on silly topics like this that makes so many ordinary Americans think that "political correctness" has taken over and we need an ignorant inarticulate man in the Oval to take us back down to earth.
1
As a woman in her 40s who does not experience and has never experienced PMS (and has been menstruating since age 11) and does not and has not ever felt or exhibited different or "hormonal" behavior as described here at any time during any month of my entire life; I have always held the theory that all of this is a myth designed by men that women fall for hook line and sinker. Judging from this column and these comments, I'm still sticking to my guns on this one
5
I enjoyed your article and get your point. Nonetheless, it bothered me that you were so rude to the second doctor. It looks to me that he was trying to help you and if you did not want to have the blood drawn, you could have handled this in a much better way.
My thoughts as I walked home from church in Central Park today was that you should be eager to adopt the affirmative defense of being "hormonal" for your behavior on this otherwise wonderful day in your life. To eschew this understandable explanation would, in my opinion, possibly offer something about your character. Maybe we wouldn't work out being on the same company softball team.
Sorta have the feeling that I should apologize and therefore I do. I understand you are a prestigious member of society, you do God's good work every day, and I intend to purchase your book to see what's in there. And I very much respect the medical profession as two Uncles went that route and I've had many personal and professional relationships with physicians and nurses and such. I have an inkling of what this kind of life is all about.
But think again how you treated the second physician and whether you were fair. Hopefully there's a chapter in your work about your discovery, along your pathway of life, of the Milk of Human Kindness. A damned fine elixir.
Nothing rude intended here. I kept thinking this doctor could have been one of my Uncles. And they are Saints and great people with top shelf manners.
Calling woman hormonal is insulting at best and simply a way to implicitly say, the woman should be ignored as irrational. Another name-calling propaganda "program" to keep women down and "in their place". Men clearly fear women -- why else would they spend lifetimes and centuries oppressing us? If humanity is to survive, women need to take control! VOTE! RESIST!!! End this male-dominated nightmare!
6
Agreed, Dr. Epstein's physician used the wrong term. But suppose he had merely called her testy, anxious, snippy, or upset? Would that have produced the same (here insert your choice of synonym for "hormonal") response?
2
OK: stop calling masculinity toxic.
Is it a deal?
5
Dear JT,
The usual phrase is "toxic masculinity" because there's a point at which machismo creates major negative effects. But masculinity itself is fine, just like femininity. It's funny that there's not a phrase "toxic femininity", yet. Don't know if there are analogues in Norway.
1
Masculinity is never called toxic.
A belief that you have to be a sexist, woman dominating, sports loving, pushy, angry bully in order to be masculine is what "toxic masculinity" refers to. It refers to a false belief of what a man is, not to actual true masculinity.
But don't you realize it is my hormones that cause me to enjoy calling women hormonal?
1
Women's hormones give women trouble.
Men's hormones give the whole planet trouble.
9
Yup, there’s the old insult that tags frustrated women, living in a patriarchy, as “hormonal.”
And, in the same league, we have the word “hysterical.”
And the phrase “you must be on the rag.”
And? The list is long.
5
I'd rather be " hormonal " with estrogen, than rage filled and stupid with testosterone. But that's just ME.
3
Dear Phyliss Dalmatian,
Keep in mind, about half our favorite characters in The Walking Dead survived by being occasionally rage filled and stupid with testosterone. It has its uses, and without it, there wouldn't be humans.
I disagree. Men seem to be able, if they try, to channel their testosterone-fueled urges in competitive and ambitious directions that can be productive just as easily as destructive. There really are plenty of good, even great, men out there. When I have PMDD, it is not something that can be channelled productively. Ever. Merely survived until it ends, and then comes around again. These false equivalencies between female and male hormones are sort of silly.
The author best summarized her point at the very end. “Hormones do a lot. They don’t make women stupid.”
I wholeheartedly agree.
1
How dare you question my testosterone levels!
Here, here! I too am so tired of being accused of my "hormones" making bad decisions. Remind me again which sex starts all the needless wars, rapes and genocide, dumps toxic materials down our waterways, alt-reality rally's and is happy to take away healthcare and education from the people so they can add more $millions to their $millions. Yes, thats right, its those male hormones run amuck. Perhaps if we can name them like we have PMS if can control them. How about TOX? Testosterone Overload Xenophobia.
4
Want extreme hormonal reactions, where people lose control - not from women, but men. What is a rapist or school shooter other than some crazy guy who cannot control his emotions? In any social situation, where is the bad behavior likely to come from? Men. So guys, please shut up about women’s raging hormones so people don’t focus on yours!
5
After the snide remarks about "female hormonal rages," the questions I would now ask of older adolescent boys and men are:
If you think men and women are absolutely separate and different beings,
Q: WHY DO YOU, A MALE, HAVE NIPPLES ON YOUR CHEST ABOVE YOUR BREASTS?
Further and related,
Q: DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT AT CONCEPTION EVERY HUMAN EMBRYO BEGINS AS FEMALE? (Before embryonic sexual differentiation starts?)
Further and still related,
Q: WHY DO MALES HAVE ESTROGEN AND FEMALES HAVE TESTOSTERONE ALBEIT IN DIFFERING RATIOS TO THEIR OTHER SEX-DETERMINATIVE HORMONE?
Try asking those questions of the males in our lives and please note the responses.
PS Why aren't we ever mentioning male hormonal rages such as those displayed by one d.j. trump and his ilk?
Can we get less of these articles telling us precisely what we can and cannot say based on someone's particular sensibilities?
Is this really an NYT level article?
4
“Hormones don’t make women stupid.” And hormones don’t cause men’s boorish, aggressive, sexist behavior, either!
1
Thank you for this viewpoint. A report on male hormones and how it affects their moods and all the drama that surrounds it, lets see that too.
5
People view women as more emotional than men. Emotions are tied to hormones, so women are viewed as acting more hormonally. The whole thing is unscientific, but there are so many facets of everyday life tied to stereotypes and baseless nonsense that fighting this particular battle seems unnecessary.
Does the author want to fight against the idea that women are more emotional than men? Disregarding biology entirely, men are conditioned to act less emotionally. Men are expected to be more stable. And unless the current year has changed men's ability to become pregnant, their hormones scientifically don't fluctuate as much as a pregnant woman's would.
1
Anger is an emotion. Males and females are trained to express and suppress different emotions. So, yes, I do challenge the idea that women are more emotional than men.
4
"but there are so many facets of everyday life tied to stereotypes and baseless nonsense that..." we need to redouble efforts to educate both genders to overcome their prejudices, and stop using demeaning labels.
There, I fixed it for you.
5
I find it extremely funny how this whole article stemmed from a situation where you thought you knew more than a doctor (which you were wrong about) and then asking the nurse to document your response, which triggered you you to act out even though you now admit she was right.. but you know they meant it in another way? They're supposed to document your condition as well.
So the doctor wasn't just throwing the term around.
4
I think it’s pretty obvious that we (men and women) are all hormonal. And also true that women are unfairly tarred with this brush more than men. But the more interesting aspect of this story is our basic animal, biologic nature which frequently gets in the way of rational behavior. Post-partum depression, bulemia, ADD, date rape- all involve human beings being hormonal.
1
Yeah, okay, but I don’t see why she had to be so shrill about it.
1
I find when someone uses the word, "chill" or "relax" to a woman nowadays it is akin to calling them hormonal. It raises my hackles and makes me angry beyond reason thus making me "hormonal", I guess.
4
I'm not sure of the purpose of this column is other than to give the author free advertising for her book.
As she only briefly mentions, hormonal differences between men and women appear to explain some very common disorders such as migraines which hit boys and girls at the same rates until puberty when there begins the marked difference with women far more likely to suffer them than men and menopause came have varying effects on these headaches.
If you don't want to call this "hormonal" fine but it's stupid to come up with another name when this one fits.
1
I can think of other words to describe it but I don’t think you’ll like them either.
3
For society in general and the ladies in particular, the best news about human hormones is that male puberty seldom lasts for more than 40 or 50 years. Then we just get cranky.
1
The old saying is that women shouldn't have positions of responsibility, since, for a week out of every month, they are out of control emotionally. The reality, of course, is that for four weeks out of every month, men are out of control emotionally.
But I'm very glad that the Times has published this column. I've never thought of any of these issues before. Next thing you know, the Times will bring up the question of whether women can be good scientists, of whether there are racial differences in IQ. Creative stuff, all that. I'm grateful.
3
Um, I have encountered PMS wackiness in various partners, and similar menopausal behaviors in others. I have no interest in women with these difficulties who believe them to be legitimate responses to the world around them without seeking ameliorative remedies.
Men also have their hormonal terrors, including rages of all kinds, especially in their vehicles. I avoid them like the plague too.
Just an old guy who prefers to be around calm and rational people.
2
Gosh, what about us post-menopause, hormone free women? Do we even still exist as females now that we are, to quote my physician, "hormone free"?
1
Women are not "hormone-free" after menopause. You might want to look for another physician. The ovaries stop producing ovules after menopause, but the ovaries are not the only gland producing hormones:
The glands of the endocrine system are:
Hypothalamus
Pineal Gland
Pituitary Gland
Thyroid
Parathyroid
Thymus
Adrenal
Pancreas
Ovaries
Testes
3
Sorry but the author sounded "hormonal"in her anecdote. She actually did refuse treatment for her son as was her right as his parent. No need to get all shouty about it. She then ran into the hospital corridor wearing just a tee shirt to continue shouting. Geez, the drama. If you don't want to be labeled hormonal or off the rails, then don't act that way.
3
The only protection from doctors is lawyers. A mutual scam perpetrated by both, so pick your poison.
2
“Hormonal” = any time a woman expresses an emotion or opinion
7
"Literally every human being is hormonal. Without hormones we couldn’t function."
So..... women ARE hormonal?
1
Yes, of course, but what would life or journalism be without contradiction?
Yes, women are hormonal and men are too. The problem is when hormones are used to demean women, and as an excuse for bad behavior (both from men and women). The other problem is when 99 per cent of the studies have women as subjects just because they menstruate and men do not.
1
"A review of PMS studies published in Gender Medicine in 2012 found that nearly 40 percent of 47 studies did not show a tie between periods and bad moods."
Seriously? I'm a *monster* in the lead-up to my period. Trump could use me in place of nukes in North Korea. Maybe I'm hormonal.
1
This is a dumb article. Of course we all have hormones. We all also know what is meant by “hormonal” when the term is used. By both sexes I might add.
So, what is the “correct” term to use to describe the behavior we no longer can describe as “hormonal” because this article ain’t making that behavior go away.
1
....and the take away is......don't call me fat just because I am obese.
3
Nothing like making your argument while ranting irrationally that you're really not hormonal.
To say that we are all dependent on hormones is to say nothing about what it is to be 'hormonal'.
Yeah, just call them crazy and let it go at that.
1
I find the bafflement of males to the manifestations of female hormones on that gender to be absolutely amazing. Look to your own I say, at the idiocy or seeming idiocy, of your own behavior. The natural history of the male gender of Homo sapiens (the specific name hilarious in itself) can only be explained by what I consider to be the curse of the Y chromosome, male hysteria. A current example being our 'president' - though I choke on the term.
9
I'll make you a deal doctor. I and other men will stop calling women hormonal if feminists stop calling all men predators, the cause of all evil in the world, worthless, devalued, not feminine enough and useless.
Deal?
2
Everyone stop caring what everyone says
Rational article until you try to suggest maybe PMS isn’t real- the age old feminist dream. Say it enough and it becomes true. Please.
1
I have never in my life heard a woman called hormonal, by anyone. I would ask the New York Times editors to consider how many times they have heard women called hormonal.
I have heard, however, that 5000 people died in Puerto Rico. Maybe, instead of articles about the tragedy women endure being called hormonal, we could have a few op-eds about the tragedy of 5000 needless deaths, which are being criminally neglected by the Media. We heard more about Roseanne, etc.
2
Actual science in an opinion piece! How refreshing. This zoologist loves it. The endocrine humor from the author's first name makes it even fun. Get Randi on your editorial board.
1
So hormone levels are not related to feckleness.
I don't believe this rant. This is some kind of diatribe against medicines and hospitals. Too much drama to be believed.
The opening scene is beyond credulity.
2
factually, correct. Truthfully, we all know what it means.
Be careful how far you take this, Randi.
It is accepted that testosterone, the male sex hormone, makes men much stronger than women. Another aspect of testosterone that no one dares investigate further are indications that testosterone makes men more intelligent.
1
Calling women "hormonal" may be overused, but I'll stick with it as an explanation for mood swings related to PMS until someone comes up with a better theory.
1
Point taken. Now can we also eliminate references to misbehavior by young men as "testosterone-fueled"?
We're all emotional actors, whether it's sex, politics, or religion.
Not to trivialize but I keep waiting for the day when one of these young male shooters gets identified as hormonal because they surely are--testosterone can be a fearless aggressor.
But man hormone = good!
woman hormone = bad
grunt.
10
I can't figure out what point the author is trying to make. Yes, women are hormonal, men are hormonal, teens are hormonal. But somehow, the author wants us not to use the word.
3
The author wants to stop the use of the word "hormonal" to demean women and dismiss their wishes and opinions.
3
But, still, can't we make testosterone a controlled substance!?!
Women are the worst at referring to themselves or to other women as hormonal. We have to stop it. No one refers to men, with testosterone levels spiked by participation in or even just watching an athletic event, as hormonal. What happens to women when men are hormonal? And we're worried about women being hormonal?
6
"No one refers to men, with testosterone levels spiked by participation in or even just watching an athletic event, as hormonal." They should. It would point out important causation.
"Will she, ..., mentally and physicially enslave us as we in the past enslaved her...". This is quite thought provoking , if and when will women demand to make our own decisions for ourselves and our bodies? We have for too long allowed men to control us.
4
Personally, I would be interested in reading a study on the effects of differing amounts/proportions testosterone and adrenaline and if IQ level moderates these effects.
"Hormones prompt growth, hunger and libido..."
Sure. But to generalize in order to paint over the intensity of the menstrual cycle and PMS is another sad indicator of contemporary revisionism with its blinders on.
2
But then, don't you have to stop callling men toxic? Or at least define the term?
Hormones can impact the behavior of both women AND men. When women 'go hormonal,' we call them crazy and make fun of their behavior. It's generally considered bad form for women to 'go hormonal.'
When men go 'hormonal,' few call it War, School Shooting, Domestic Violence and Rape. Nobody jokes about men who 'go hormonal.' Big Pharma sells -- and the FDA approves -- the hormone that makes males 'go hormonal.' Testosterone, available by Rx from your local pharmacy, is the world's deadliest hormone.
5
Actually Dr. Epstein you sound like you may have been "hormonal" when you wrote this article.
Postpartum depression or even psychosis, PMS, depression and anxiety in early menopause, the profound loss of emotions and sensations many of us feel after an oophorectomy - these are all emotional states which are triggered by shifts in hormones. The episodes of weeping that many men experience when they're treated with estrogen for prostate cancer shows us what an excess of that particular hormone can do. Nobody ever said that these shifts make us stupid, but clearly hormonal imbalances can trigger profound episodes of depression, anxiety, irrationality and even homicidal ideation.
P.S. When I was in the throes of postpartum protectiveness a man I perceived of as "menacing" came to my door. I was shocked to hear myself actually growl at him as I put the baby behind me and had a momentary vision of biting his throat. hormonal? Yup.
1
I'm a man and I have hormones 24/7. Women couldn't possibly understand. But I never use it as an excuse for any behavior.
2
Of the two sexes, women are considered to be the more emotional one. Yet if male rage and aggression aren't emotions I don't know what is.
3
Crimes of passion, road rage, bar fights, domestic abuse, etc....are most often performed by which gender?
1
This is an easy argument for a woman to win. All you have to do is look at the statistics: sure women commit their crimes around their periods but their rate of offending is much lower than that of men. So the basic argument is that for a few days a month the women are as crazy as men are all the time.
1
Good. No more talk about menopause.
Makes sense.
1
Some people like to substitute you by your brain or by your DNA, and now you by your hormone. I am sure scientists have some insights when referring to brain, DNA, or hormone specifically but I do not feel like understanding better just by hearing these words.
Hysteria or Hysterical - exaggerated emotion - from the Greek - Hustera or womb or Husterikos, of the womb.
Similarly, I would propose Testerical - for exaggerated aggression as seen in many males, including our current president.
Wonderful article. Thank you.
Are the Weinsteins and Cosbys hormonal? Sounds like a good defense.
"... born in London ..."
"The pediatrician ..."
"... another doctor ..."
The author is right to be outraged by the medical incompetence she encountered, but focuses on the wrong problem. This was a case of a hospital that does not respect its patients. And a case of at least one arrogant doctor who, apparently, was a woman.
* Did this occur at a British National Health Service hospital?
* Wasn't the author given any documentation explaining her rights as a patient?
* Doesn't the hospital solicit comments and complaints from patients?
"... that day at the hospital all those years ago, ..."
The author should have said when and where this incident occurred. Surely it didn't occur in 1939 ...
Not to mention the crazy making effects of artificial hormones on women's behaviour , especially libido and depression.
The huge elephant in the room, in my not so humble opinion.
The last sentence says it all, thank you.
Blaming hormones for a "rant" you made directly after giving birth is simplistic and underestimates the extreme complexity of the human body? Because this is a rant you would ordinarily make on a "day-to-day basis"? This is a bizarre strawman argument built on irrelevant information (a stupid and very sexist doctor speaking 80 years ago, a meta analysis that finds more studies claim a link between "periods and bad moods" than studies which claim no link), speculation ("investigators have long wondered") and the selective presentation and omission of particular parts of the endocrine system. I feel sick thinking of what my classics teachers would have said to me if I presented an oral argument this weak in class. But I assure you, it's not hormonal! Or if it is, I feel that sick anyway!
1
And then there was the deputy governor of the Bank of England who, three weeks ago, thought it would be clever to use the metaphor “menopausal” to describe the UK economy. He then explained that this meant economies that were “past their peak, and no longer so potent.”
He later apologized for a “poor choice of language,” but maybe he’d better do some work on his “mindset” as well.
3
While technically a good point, this op-ed underscores a pervasive issue in society to place a level of importance on "words" that calls into question aspects of verbal communication that frankly is a giant waste of our society's resources and mind-share.
It seems our efforts and procedures to curb "hate speech" has crept into the scope of daily language.
Just as Dr. Epstein has a 1st amendment right to rant, I am exercising my 1st amendment right to assert that this article is a pedantic waste of time. Please feel free to disagree with, or be offended by, my viewpoint - if you'd like.
3
now, if a man had authored this good article, it would be taken as gold....
1
Do some hormone combinations lead to actions, actions that a control group watching video predict can be described as going off the rails?
Yes.
Grow up. Takes hormones to enter adulthood.
Thank you for this piece.
Clearly nobody means "only women are hormonal" when they say "woman are hormonal" (or "she is being hormonal"). That's just a red herring. I'm not saying this is an appropriate use of language, but this column just straightforwardly misidentifies the purported meaning of the expression.
Amazing that anybody, especially a clinician, would use such a term, but at least she did say you were hysterical (look up the word derivation).
Do you think it is wiser to say that a woman is being grumpy, teary, whiny, or catty entirely of her own volition?
1
Doesn't the writer want to know why her baby was born premature? It may help prevent another premature birth in future.
1
Nature is complex and intelligent. If your particular hormone balance made you cry out to protect your baby just hours after giving birth it was for a good reason.
1
first doctor was right and the second doctor was wrong? why was the test needless? maybe explain that point to know why your outburst shouldn't have been described as hormonal.
Sorry doc, I've been a nurse for 15 years and women become moody, irrational and volatile around the time of their menses. This is not a pattern I see with men unless they are misusing HRT. Furthermore you seem to have focused on women of childbearing years - let me tell you the office of RNs in which I work is rife with post menopausal women having their own "personal summers." This is due to changes in hormone levels. You can call it whatever you want, doesn't change the fact that women are hormonal.
1
"This is not a pattern I see with men unless they are misusing HRT."
Oh interesting because I see men being moody, irrational, and volatile all the time.
So, when males "snap" and gun down large numbers of people in schools and churches and the like, is that the male version of "being hormonal"?
4
Does this mean that Trump has a huge fluctuation of hormones every day? Can I try to explain his irrational and crazy behavior by saying that he is hormonal?
After hearing women complain endlessly of male hormones, this article, and others like it, strike me as extremely defensive. They are tiring. Stop it.
2
Did someone clockwork orange your eyes open to read it?
You do realize that women pointing out men's hormones is a response to the decades of men dismissing women's emotions via the term "hormonal"? That women didn't start this conversation?
Just please don't call me or any other women the "C" word. Don't call me hormonal either. Start treating women as people and give us the respect that any human should be given.
As a post-menopausal women I have take a bolder approach - anytime someone blames hormones I respond, "Yes, that testosterone is nothing to mess with. Have you ever seen what it does to deer during mating season?"
1
Men baffled by the effect of gender specific hormones on women? For God's sake, look to yourselves!
"The ebb and flow of hormones shape all of us — men and women — physically and emotionally, from before birth to death."
Stress hormones can cause surprising effects. In his book*, Captain Richard Phillips says that after he was rescued from Somali pirates, he couldn't stop crying. His doctor explained that was a normal response after having built up stress hormones during his ordeal.
Phillips also discusses that in his 2013 Reddit "Ask Me Anything" conversation. Google: 'I am Captain Richard Phillips, whose story inspired the film "Captain Phillips." Ask me almost anything.'
* "A captain's duty : Somali pirates, Navy Seals, and dangerous days at sea" by Richard Phillips with Stephan Talty.
Well they'll need to come up with another word for it then. Women ARE hormonal, it's not a bad thing but it's a fact.
2
And your point is? Irrational, illogical behavior by either sex should be called that and not ‘hormonal behavior’? OK. The Greeks called it ‘hysteria’. Look at the root word.
Why yes, we all know that the Greeks were sexist too. You get the award for circular logic in today's comment sections! Yay!
"Stop calling women hormonal". What is the right term, PMSing? Does merely swapping out the word "hormonal" with better vocabulary suddenly make it all better ? If it was only that simple. Perhaps its less the technicals of the word, but all the complexity, sensitivity and hush nature surrounding the broader topic.
1
In your anecdote you behaved irrationally after giving birth. It might have been hormones! Or maybe you're just irrational. Which is worse?
Women are "more hormonal" than men. This is obvious to everyone. While chalking up every irregular behavior to hormones might be simplistic, demanding that people to deny objective reality in the name of political correctness is why liberals keep losing elections.
1
What a missed opportunity! The author spends all of her time explaining the obvious -- we all have hormones -- but none examining the deeper, injurious assumptions of 'craziness' we put on half the population. Calling women hormonal is a cultural norm that marginalizes women, sets in motion beliefs that women are not to be believed, that women have zero authority over their own experience. This sets the stage for all sorts of injustices as seen in the revelations of the MeToo movement.
4
Well said. Stupid comments like your doctor's have no place in science, as they are a product of sheer ignorance...or purposeful belittling our better half. Whoever decides not to be hormonal (by suppression, I guess), has his/her days marked for extinction.
1
"Hormones do a lot. They don’t make women stupid."
Well said!
8
What a chip on her shoulder.
3
As a society we believe that women should be forgiven for bad behavior that coincides with hormone changes due to pregnancy and the menstrual cycle. We do not extend a similar courtesy to men. When we excuse women in this fashion we think (although generally don't say) that they are being "hormonal". The act of excusing behavior in this circumstance begs for a word to describe the circumstance. All this seems eminently fair to me. It is very much to the benefit of women, who are accused of being "hormonal" primarily when they are not conducting themselves in a manner that they would generally be proud of. Men would be very pleased to have a similar excuse for their worst behavior, but few actually believe that "thinking with your penis" is a medical condition that mitigates culpability.
2
That "being hormonal" is even something to be written on a chart/file shows how little actual science is being absorbed by allegedly educated and trained medical professionals. Scary.
As the author points out, being hormonal is a second by second thing for humans. So to diagnose someone as being hormonal is like looking outside and saying, "Its weathering." And thinking you said something important about the conditions.
Scientific realities and the practice of medicine seem to be more and more out of step. Where doctors still diagnose and prescribe using outdated beliefs (myths?) that are not grounded in facts. And that biases are truly a problem in the industry...an industry too focused (IMO) on profits then services to the patient.
8
Many physicians are condescending toward patients. Their education, training, and professional culture lead them to believe they are in a superior position to define who is abnormal, who is less than human, who has a low quality of life, or who has a futile existence. Sexism, racism, ageism, classism, homophobia, and other prejudices are as much a part of their being as they are in other humans, but physicians rationalize their biases medically and essentially blame their victims. They don't take well to their authority being challenged. They didn't spend years in school, residency, and fellowship to be treated as less than the know-it-alls they imagine their training confirms. Genuine humanity requires humility and enough self-doubt to recognize one can often be wrong in human judgments, regardless of one's expertise.
6
Gimme a (multiple factor) break.
She says she's not "hormonal," and then starts out with an anecdote of her swinging, raging hormones after birth.
Of course she's hormonal. So are we men. No one denies that, although she seems to present this as defense of women's reproductive years hormone swings as not so much.
My (wonderful) woman, age 52, hadn't had a period in seven months. On her way to menopause. About a month after we started having sex, she had a period! And has so since then.
And me? Age 71 at the time, suddenly I regained muscles long atrophied and just all around looked younger. That's what clued K into noticing I, too, was different than when we met.
Hormones. Long may they puzzle us!
3
Hormones are part of our genetics which are a major underlying source of our behavior. And way to many seem to think that they can exercise mind over matter so to speak. We can't. At best we can attempt to manage the periphery.
When I was in my late 20s and a commercial banker in NYC, my friend, who was our in house legal counsel, noticed that once a month I came into her office swearing like a truck driver. She pointed it out to me. Thus was "Black Thursday" born for me because I was on the pill so it was THAT regular.
I laugh at that now and it helped me understand what was going on while I was negotiating multimillion $ banking deals. It was the only time of the month that I acted and spoke like all the guys I was working with!
1
My most "hormonal" moment occurred when I was taking a form of HRT in which contained not just estrogen, but also testosterone - which female bodies normally produce until menopause. While I loved how the testosterone spiked my libido, I realized I needed to lower my dose when I picked a fight with the driver of an 18-wheeler. THAT was hormonal!
2
Who calls women hormonal? I haven't heard that characterization in decades.
Being considered 'hormonal' may not be a negative thing though. Yes, it can be done with an eye-roll and a patronising tone.
It can also be done to endure behaviour, which, while it could be driven by other things, is quite uncomfortable for the recipient. I have a family member who, at certain times of the month, becomes unpleasant to be around. She's sharp, accusatory and nothing you do is ever right and all you can do is tiptoe around her. If you speak to her afterwards about it, she doesn't perceive that there was anything wrong with what she did.
Ultimately, does she mean it? No. Is it controllable? I'm not sure, if she's not aware of it, and if she is aware of it, can she stop it? I know I find myself arguing black is white myself at when I'm pre-menstrual and it's really, really hard not to do that - although recognising that I'm doing it does help as at least I can take myself away from people.
So we shrug our shoulders, say she's hormonal and remind ourselves that this too will past. It's not her fault. And as someone who also feels the irrational sway of hormones, I'm not prepared to say it is her fault either.
Medicine is sexist. We should include female physicians because many emulate their male counterparts. Persons give consent before treatment and may refuse. But medicine is still sexist, and "hormonal women" is just another insult. Male bias influences how physicians manage or mismanage patients. Too few consider hormones when planning care. Epilepsy is but one example. Estrogen does increase the "excitability" of neurons, and for some women, it can increase risk for seizures throughout the monthly cycle. But are hormonal swings intrinsic, the result of environmental exposure, diet, obesity, or dozens of other possible reasons? Do the drugs used for treatment affect hormones? The estrogenic effect of pollution is another example. Poor children living close to factories may be exposed to bisphenols, and these pollutants affect hormones. These substances appear to be related to premature puberty. What about the effect diet, and substances like artificial sweeteners on insulin and other hormones? Male denial prevents meaningful research. There is no medical specialty which studies male hormones. Medicine can be very sexist, and this is a hormonal fact.
2
Maybe this will help staunch the quackery around hormones. There are too many out there trying to profit from a wide range of hormone therapies who rely on patients' perception that they are hormonal and need to rebalance.
4
TD - its the notion that there is a "perfect balance" that is truly at the heart of this issue, as well as most other health issues facing us. Be it dieting, work and home-life related stress, exercise, performance related issues of any kind, etc. We've been pitched the belief that there is a Perfect Balance that can be achieved by following any numbers of regimens. Dietary, exercise, drug, or a mix of several.
There is no perfect balance. As we dont truly know what most of the hormones do, or how they effect each other on a minute by minute basis. We have broad understandings, but nothing remotely close to what is a right balance all the live-long day.
We've been duped to believe in Perfection as an attainable goal in far too many aspects of our lives.
And in the case of women, they have been routinely victimized by a culture that sells it to them in many forms.
4
Absolutely. A fair number of cults prey on people who think there is a balance of some sort and these cults, usually promoting their practices as science or creating studies that seem scientific, target them. They claim to have some special knowledge of balance and the ability to read it and them go on to sell diets, mantras, therapies, potions, etc. at a pretty high price. Unfortunately, these groups can often convince someone with a medical credential to front them or join them.
Mislabeling women's concerns and complaints leads to poorer care from the grotesqueness of lobotomies to missing important symptoms. Even kind, well meaning practitioners can fall into using stereotypes.
Reminding them that certain words can be signs that they are falling short of their duty of care to their patients is a good thing.
4
The author is correct that everyone at some time is subject to hormonal imbalances. Boys and girls, including my daughter for the last four years, go through patches of puberty and both are regularly described as "hormonal." Both learn to recognize and adjust to their changed biology, and, more importantly, they learn to accept that their parents are trying to be helpful when they are told that they are being hormonal. Men learn to recognize the surges of hormones that accompany competition and the decline of hormones that accompany aging, and they learn to accept the truth that hormones continually tweak their psychic states. Women go through menopause and regularly talk amongst themselves about the challenges that accompany hormonal imbalances. The author is correct that we all experience this, so why is it that only women go bash!t crazy when someone else describes them as "hormonal"? (Yes, this is a rhetorical question.)
2
Hmm. Maybe because this term (and its predecessors such as the ancient “humours”) has been consistently and systematically used to demean women, and not men, since at least the time of the ancient Greeks?
My belief, being a woman who experiences "PMS," is that any dislike I express while under the influence of menstrual hormones is something I dislike the rest of the month as well. The hormones just remove the facade of "feminine" politeness I was trained from childhood to exhibit to garner favor with the public at large. In the week before my period, I simply feel unencumbered to voice those things which perturb me all the time, but I've been taught to swallow with a smile, so I'm pretty while I'm being seen and not heard.
15
No doubt about it, human males and females have lots of similar and different kinds of hormones, and hormones can affect behavior, attitudes and emotions.
I had two sisters, numerous girlfriends and a first wife, all of whom at various times shared with me how much they hated their periods due to the pain and the emotional ups and downs they experienced. My second wife hated her periods and, as happens with so many women, had prominent emotional and mood swings just before and during menopause. And, of course, there is the well-known and well-documented phenomenon of post-partum depression among new mothers.
However, it is not belittling or sexist to make these observations, which are well documented though perhaps not well understood. Of course, men are also subject to hormonal influences on behavior, attitudes and emotions. However, the triggers for these reactions may be harder to study and understand because they are not linked to obvious phenomena like menstruation, menopause and birth.
4
I don’t know if we will ever be able to clean up the language to everyone’s satisfaction due to it’s ancient roots.
Hormonal is a technical sounding word for moody, it is slang. We do this all the time. I mistakenly wore the scarlet letter of
Hepatitis for 25 years due to a doctors use of slang. I agree words have meaning, but good luck getting rid of slang.
3
I read the author's piece twice, trying to figure out if the idea of "don't call me hormonal just because I'm a woman expressing a feeling," dismisses the very true hormonal fluctuations women experience when premenstrual. While she acknowledges PMS, to equate what some women go through each month with hormone fluctuations all people (and apparently babies) go through feels like it diminishes the very real suffering some women experience each month. (This is not to say hormonal disorders men or babies experience are not deserving of care.) As someone with PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder, or extremely awful PMS), for nearly 2 weeks every month I feel like a different person. I am depressed, at times nearly suicidal, withdraw, cancel plans, have extremely low energy, and struggle to get to work (though somehow I always make it). The other 2 weeks I feel fantastic: I am focused, driven, social, laughing, optimistic, and have great energy. More women (and men) need to understand their (or their partner's) cycles so they can realize that in some cases it IS INDEED their hormones, and that saying "I'm PMSing" is not just an excuse to cover up "bad" behavior -- the hormonal suffering some women experience due to their menstrual cycle is very real. I exercise and eat well, yet the PMDD persists. The medical community and the world over would benefit from taking it seriously.
18
Thank you! Me too!
1
No mention of thyroid? Those hormones really complicate things for women and men. Hunter Epstein is not a doctor and seems to be writing about medical care delivery more than complexities of diagnosis let alone living with hormones.
3
to say men and women both have hormones is deeply misleading. basic college biology will teach you about women’s menstrual cycle, during which a multitude of hormones are released at various times. there is no comparable comparison for men. it’s just science.
17
Testosterone is a hormone. Female mammals that don’t have menestral cycles still have reproductive hormones. There are many non-reproductive hormones males and females both have - growth hormone, thyroid hormone, parathyroid hormone, aldosterone, cortisol, a slew of pituitary hormones controlling production of many of the above hormones, and more. It’s just endocrinology.
28
Just because "basic college biology" does not include male dysfunction does not mean it does not exist. Perhaps it is time to study male dysfunction resulting from hormones. For example, suicide (much higher rate in men), war, rampant sexual harassment and misconduct, domestic violence, road rage, or school shootings should be addressed by immediately drawing blood and subjecting it to critical analyses. Actually studying men in a meaningful way may provide the basis for alleviating a lot of the misery in this world.
12
Though obviously men have hormones that shoot up and down also. It's well-established that testosterone rises in men returning from war, that violent criminals (of both genders) tend to have higher testosterone levels etc.
& it's also well-established that the general hormonal soup within the body (not just the usual well-known lead characters in these discussions) are always moving up and down in reaction tot he circumstance we each find ourselves in.
Yes, we are all hormonal. However, the term is frequently used, by men and women, to discount a women's concerns. Another familiar practice we should take a moment to examine and discard if we want women to fully participate. Now, lets work on telling women to "Smile!".
54
Only if women who disapprove of a man's behavior can stop using "toxic masculinity" and "roid rage"?
Yes, we're all hormonal. But we also have SOME control over our hormones. Cognitive processes, diet, sleep, exercise, etc, etc, etc ... all have a bearing on which hormones get released or inhibited (within certain physical parameters that we probably don't understand 100%).
3
Dr. Epstein's column beautifully, albeit perhaps inadvertently, underscores a broader social problem arising from attempts to craft practical wisdom from oversimplified science. We socialize according to the beliefs of the day, but, depending on how deeply those beliefs are woven into our social fabric, new facts and understandings that should serve to change the social structure instead get buried by outdated beliefs defended by minds adapted to the old way of thinking. Science tells us those minds may never change, which could explain the snail's pace of worldwide human progress. It also means we should focus greater educational resources to teaching children and uneducated adults how human minds work so they may better assess their circumstances and challenge their beliefs. After all, beliefs that comfort us today may kill us tomorrow. Sex (and other human characteristics) aside, the lesson for everyone is to try hard to stay open-minded and educated.
11
We live in a culture which overvalues rationality and undervalues emotion. Emotions give us essential information to make balanced decisions. When we deny our emotions or misdescribe them because we are out of touch with them and have created a false belief system around what we feel, they can erupt suddenly and destructively. Men get into fights and start wars; that's hormonal destruction sometimes bolstered by delusions of ego or/and mania.
When we deny the feelings of others and ourselves in our flawed attempts to be "completely rational" we are incapable of making lasting peace or of respecting others among many possible outcomes.
25
Re: “men fight wars:” Indira Gandhi, Margaret Thatcher, Golda Meir.
Dr. Epstein, thank you for this article. It's long over due.
It truly angers me when having a conversation with the male species and, my words are peppered with a touch more emotional bravado, I'm deemed hormonal . My words have not been heard. They are simply just cast away as being emotional irrational because it was quite evident , my hormone level is a bit off the chart today.
The male species owns the right to bravado, because if it is used by a female, it throws them way off kilter.
Gentleman, we are all simply human beings under this skin we all wear. Get over it.
53
Ok, the doctors could have acted differently, but men and women each have group behaviors (in general) that the opposite sex always recognizes as much different from their own. My wife watched my little boy become a man and replace the softness with male anger (at being told what to do). It ended ok - he's almost 40 now.
And so... if we men were able to listen to women speak in private about the men they interact with, we'd hear about male hormonal differences. Well the writer was also acting in a manner that a man simply does not understand viscerally - hope she can get over it.
3
I'm not a man but I understand that she was reacting rationally the pediatrition had cleared him to go home without mentioning a blood test the results of which would determine some future treatment. If the second doctor had given some more concrete reason for a needle stick of a newborn his mother might have consented. She has nothing to get over.
21
There is danger in our identify driven political world to now ask medical professionals to ignore core biological functions when assessing a patient. Should we use more precise language so as to not use a generalized term to dismiss someone’s behavior. Certainly. Similarly to saying, a person is “depressed”, a flip term can lack important nuance and appear to trivialize. As the author points out, in fact driven by hormones to the point of behaviors that affect judgement is in fact a real thing
2
My daughter used to get mad at me if I attributed bad behaviour to her being hungry but a lot of the time it was hunger. It can be the same with so many things that affect anyone’s moods: hunger, fatigue, PMS and so on.
It’s taken me a life time to learn to understand my irregular menstrual cycle and how it affects my moods. My mother was ideologically opposed to the idea of PMS and it wasn’t until I was well into my twenties, a mother myself and off the pill, that I began to draw connections.
The first half of my cycle can be a time of tremendous energy. I want to be near my husband; I feel alive with possibility. In the second half, it’s not that I’m bad tempered but I do feel less energetic. I find I have more patience with my kids but my husband irritates me. I feel bloated and sluggish but, on the bright side, very interested in cooking.
I do change with my monthly cycle. I wish I had been able to understand more of this when I was younger. I find that some women are afraid of being dismissed or not taken seriously because of their cyclical hormones (because yes, we all have hormones but it’s the cyclical and changeable nature of premenopausal women’s that can be problematic), and hence don’t want to talk honestly about this. But more research into women’s hormonal fluxes could improve our understanding of ourselves. It shouldn’t be taboo to acknowledge this.
34
Hormones influence our behavior and the regular of our essential organs. Recently I had two parathyroid glands removed. A small tumor on one of these glands depleted calcium from my bones and was making very ill. After the surgery, I was literally on an emotional roller coaster for a few weeks. I'm certain teenagers and pregnant women experience emotional instability due endocrine changes. As a teenager, the need to work and plan for my future, left me little time to express emotional problems which young people are prone to manifest. However, I'm certain extremes are very real and affect some people more than others.
6
Agree with the scientific truth that hormones are essential for human functioning.
However - ‘mother is hormonal’ seems like an awfully strange thing to dictate into a medical record. And just like in the US, nurses are not present to act as scribes for physicians in England.
Also, without specific training in high risk OB, it’s probable Dr Epstein wouldn’t have known what was important and not in terms of testing. Perhaps Dr #2 in this anecdote was from the OB service, and Dr#1 was the pediatrician.
Further, the infant is premature, and they are being released from the hospital at 12 hours post partum?
Perhaps this story has more to do with promoting the upcoming release this month of the author’s book on hormones...
28
Until fairly recently due dates were not always precise. We do not know in what year Jack was born or what his birth weight was. The pediatrition would have been the expert in whether he needed in hospital neonatal care. You don't need a medical degree to understand that the point of that blood test was not to make a decision about treatment of Jack or his mother.
Of course it is about promoting the book but you needn't be so insultingly snide.
12
Great article! Thank you so much for saying what has needed to be said for many years - and for doing so in such an intelligent, succinct, and knowledgeable way.
13
My observation is that men too go through a kind of men-o-pause. I wish there was more public knowledge of this and that they'd get help and support for their moods. Poor dears!
28
I have a trans-male-to-female co-worker, a real-used-to-be-Bruce-Jenner-kind-of jock, who now complains that he cries "at the drop of a hat"; that his breasts are now so tender that he's had to forego hot showers--the force of the waterspray, itself, feeling ever-so-much like a "hail of bullets" from a double-barreled shotgun pelting his chest. How the mere act of hugging, even lightly, is now verboten and how his clothes never "fit" the same way two days in a row. He pestered me for some sort of solace to his situation, but the only phrase I could utter with complete and total honesty was, "Welcome to being a woman!"
1
Thank you Ann, you're right, and it's mostly a dropping off of testosterone. Totally generalizing here, but usually men's bodies weaken, aches and pains increase, sex drive invariably decreases. This makes men feel less manly, less useful and attractive, and many will compensate in various ways, like buying an electric guitar or sports car.
Unfortunately since men are supposed to be tough, they usually don't get help for the repercussions of the negative effects of aging, but maybe that will change as generational attitudes do.
A thoughtful addendum to your plea would be to join it with a plea to stop referring to male behavior in terms of testosterone. We tend to avoid looking at some issues by dismissing them as prompted by estrogen and/or testosterone.
34
LOL, it seems to me that both are true.
4
It never ceases to amaze me the degree to which lay people and medical scientists alike focus on hormones in attempts to explain human behavior. Although hormones may influence emotions virtually all humans are largely capable of choosing whether or not to display normative behavior, or to engage in behavior that is not considered normative. So men typically refuse to cry in public--despite feeling like they could cry at any moment--to avoid being judged as deficient. Although humans may not be able to control emotions they feel, they are frequently able to decide which emotions they'll act on or display. The gender differences are not controlled by hormones, but are due to the social construction of masculinity and femininity--thus women have been given social permission to display emotions (with the exception of anger, for when they display anger they are more likely to be negatively sanctioned). Men are more likely to be negatively sanctioned for demonstrating what are stereotypically defined as non-masculine emotions, such as fear or sadness--with anger being the emotion society defines as supremely masculine. This is why women get defined as "hormonal," when they display any level of anger. Hormones do not control behavior like a steering wheel controls the direction of a car--they are but 1 influence on behavior. How we socially construct reality and create meaning for different groups of people has a far greater influence on human behavior.
38
If you think that men "refuse to cry in public" you might not understand much about many of the men in your life.
I am completely willing to cry in public, but I don't -- I have no urge to cry when upset or sad. I wish that I did, but as an adult male those emotions are usually walled off. I can cry at a movie or tear up when I'm reading something, but in my daily interactions I'm able to access anger or upset but tears just don't come. If you talk to men, you'll find that I'm hardly alone in this. I think it is pretty common in American men in modern society. There have been times in our history when tears and weeping were a male norm, as was the expression of love and affection between men, and I have hopes when I watch the way male teens relate that we are moving back toward men having access to the full range of human emotion.
You basically just proved his point.
The physician's request that blood be drawn to determine the causes of the premature birth was eminently reasonable and responsible. For whatever reason, the response of Randi Hutter Epstein to this request was not. There are many medically sound reasons why a blood test should have been taken. It would have required, in all likelihood, only a short delay in Ms. Epstein's departure from the hospital. A premature birth is a medically significant event. How did Epstein know the test was "needless." She should, at the very least, have asked the physician (a woman) to explain her concerns. A rant, followed by an angry exit from the hospital, was hardly appropriate. My sympathies are with the doctor, who was acting in the best interest of mother and child. Ms. Epstein owes her an apology.
73
The doctor apparently did not give a reasonable, scientifically based, specific reason for doing the test. I've been the point person for several very sick people over the last several decades and one of my crucial skills is making doctors - and nurses - explain in detail how some medicine or procedure will help my patient, especially if it is invasive like drawing blood from a newborn. With the child already cleared to go home by the pediatritian it was very reasonable for his mother to think that a blood test was not going to affect any treatment decision.
35
Which analysis of the blood would you do specifically to “determine the causes of the premature birth”? I can’t think of any specifically that would give the answer to this question. And would it make a difference? Also, it isn’t clear from the article whether the physician (why do you mention it was a female doctor in your comment?) wanted to draw blood from the Randi Hutter Epstein or from her newborn son Jack. And why didn’t the doctor explain to her what she wanted from the blood work, in stead of marking in her medical record that she was refusing treatment? I think you are too judgmental.
8
"crucial skill" - is that how the trained medical professionals trying to do their jobs and help your friends seem to view it?
2
I know that men have hormones too, I sometimes feel like I have my own cycle although it does not appear to be very regular or steady in length.
It's still perfectly accurate to call women 'hormonal', though. The difference between the average woman and the average man in this regard is like between someone who drank a beer and someone who had ten beers. Both drank alcohol, but we'd only call one of them drunk. Many (not all) women have completely different personalities depending on where they are in their cycle. Not to mention even more extreme events like pregnancy and child birth.There is nothing like that in men. Some men are rational, others aren't, but they will be more or less the same on any given day.
11
"There is nothing like that in men"
So the misogynistic behavior & rage induced violence that is seen commonly in men has nothing to do with hormones?
1
Simply saying someone is "hormonal" in a medical context is tantamount to admitting that the Dr. Has no real clue what is going on. It means nothing.
I have not met anyone who has the ability to look with the naked eye and see hormones pulsing through the body. Probably most people even with a prepared slide couldn't tell the difference between denim fibers and testosterone. Maybe, I don't know. I think the key is keep the bar pretty low. Remember we are dealing with humans.
4
Words like "hormonal" are used too often to cast aspersions on individuals who have done nothing to deserve them.
Statistically the two sexes have personalities with different distributions. As long as this fact is referred to accurately (and without presuming that it implies anything about an individual), what language is acceptable to use?
8
Casting generalized aspersions is lazy thinking and speaking, is usually done by someone in a power position or who is acting as though they were, and should be unacceptable. Moreover it may silence its object and may change the object's behavior but usually does not convince the object of the caster's correctness.
4
It is very refreshing, even comforting, to read a column and comments which are directed to the reality upon which we can all agree.
However advanced, we are understandable as animals.
6
Frankly, among the MANY words we use to characterize women, I'd focus on banning others before I focused on banning "hormonal".
"Ditzy" is one example that comes to mind.
Some will argue that we can seek to ban more than one, indeed ALL words that unfairly and inaccurately characterize women. But, just as frankly, I doubt that as a society we have the attention span required to do that.
8
Good point Mr. Luettgen, but I don't think we should ban words at all. If we ban 'hormonal' as an insult, then dozens of other words will be substituted, and have the same effect. I don't think people would prefer being written off as 'hysterical' or 'trumpian'.
1
Bet Samantha Bee wishes someone had told her to cross the "c" word off her list.
1
To me the issue was that it was used in a medical setting to dismiss the concerns of the woman. When women's medical problems are dismissed as anxiety or hormones they often don't get the treatment they need.
Women are less likely to get treatment for heart disease than men in part because their symptoms can be different and are dismissed as anxiety.
4
The response of the female brain to menstrual cycle is very special in its own way. For some women, the price for being fertile and nurturing is going through monthly bouts of heightened emotions. It is a biological fact. Its frequency and predictability, specific to females has been recognized for millennia, though not always understood in the correct light. I personally do not take the term hormonal as a slight. My 'hormonal' behavior luckily was usually a craving for chocolate.
20
"A review of PMS studies published in Gender Medicine in 2012 found that nearly 40 percent of 47 studies did not show a tie between periods and bad moods."
Not a fact. 40% is nearly half; close to random. And chocolate is not a "mood".
1
I suggest that you reread the WHOLE article. The author points out that a survey of research into what is called PMS, which was published in “Gender Medicine” questions the simplistic assumption that the moods of all menstruating women are affected by the cycle: :
Of 47 English language studies identified, 18 (38.3%) found no association of mood with any MC phase; 18 found an association of negative mood in the premenstrual phase combined with another MC phase; and only 7 (14.9%) found an association of negative mood and the premenstrual phase. Finally, the remaining 4 studies (8.5%) showed an association between negative mood and a non-premenstrual phase. Considering the only 41 adequately powered studies, the same phase links were reported by 36.6%, 41.5%, and 13.5% of studies, respectively. Their diversity of methods (sampling, instruments, and cycle phase definitions) precluded a meta-analysis.
1
Exhaustion vs hormones is the biggest barrier to rational thinking. I do believe that as one ages we go through hormonal changes that seem to present a serious influence as we hit 50 - 60. That said, post 50, if I have a decent nights sleep, I'm a far more gracious human being.
15
Changes in hormone levels have been a central concern for this 47 year old male since being diagnosed with secondary hypogonadism following a nasty bout of glandular fever n my mid thirties. I take medication to increase testosterone levels and medication to reduce estrogen and following some trial and error in getting the dosage right, it seems to work just fine. Without this treatment, I would not be able to work because of panic attacks, anxiety, fatigue and the very frightening psychological sensation of not feeling wholly present in a situation. In short, hormones matter just as much for men as they do for women and should be a standard part of any medical check up particularly for middle-age men.
44
Saying a woman is being hormonal is another way of saying we're stupid, to be ignored, or just plain not worth enough to be taken seriously. At least we know what it feels like to have our hormones fluctuate each month we're aware of why we may feel or act a certain way. My question, as a woman is this: what excuse do men have for their all over the place emotions?
128
Yes, men have hormonal fluctuations too but you will know that if a man is exhibiting a certain emotion, there is a very high chance that emotion will not flip without a moment worth of notice. I have never once in over 50 years seen a man go from a frothing rage into a puddle of sobbing tears virtually instantaneously. It is not that the genders don't share hormonal fluctuations, it's that women have a demonstrably more difficult time controlling a much broader swing of emotions.
23
And men have a difficult time expressing certain emotions unless they are violent about it. Furthermore OrinHD, you're wrong. I have seen and experienced plenty of males going from being calm to screaming in rage. But they get away with it because they are men, real men. I'd rather see someone dissolve into tears instead of red-faced rage. Tears don't hurt anyone. Rage can.
137
I think the issue is one of consistency. Women sometimes give the impression of being inconsistent and irrational in their emotional responses.
In part, I think, this is because you aren't direct. You'll get upset about one thing, and express anger over something trivial and unrelated, leaving the man scratching his head. Or just expect us to catch on to something and get upset when we don't.
But I think it's also true that a woman's mood fluctuates.
That many women are like this (but not all) is something every guy knows and takes for granted.
That's not to say that we guys can't be emotional or irrational -- far from it.
But I don't think we can ignore a real phenomenon here.
2
While it may be a bit off the real message of this thoughtful essay, there is also the issue of hormone mimics: foreign substances and pollutants in our air, water and food that interfere with the body's endocrine system. In fact, the prevalence of these substances could be wreaking havoc on us in ways we barely can measure or understand. Our natural systems are in conflict with our human-made chemical constructs that the federal authorities responsible for testing and regulating them have scarcely been able to scrutinize. If President Deplorable’s deplorable appointment to head the EPA has anything to do with it— as he profoundly does— there will be even less scientific scrutiny. This should worry all of us as our hormonal excretions are likely at odds with the increasing volumes of unregulated and uncontrolled chemicals ubiquitously bathing our every turn.
24
You’re right—it is indeed non-sequitir(sp?).
But actually refreshing compared to many of the other comments and even the the theme of the opinion piece.
1
It's a matter of understanding and recognizing when hormones of any kind are out of balance and affecting your thinking and actions in inappropriate or unproductive ways, even dangerous ways to yourself and others. In popular culture, we seem to get more information about women's hormones than men's and only in the negative ways they affect behavior, not the positive. This is a result of patriarchy, of course. Research on mental health, which is a renewed concern in light of all the gun violence lately, should focus on the role of hormones in male behavior.
34
Science has understood the role of hormones in men's behavior for many years, Abigail; hell, in a sense, we've known that for thousands of years, as castration shows us what happens when the level of male hormones is reduced.
We have been more reluctant to discuss the effects of female hormones for reasons of political correctness. Our paradigm is still one that assumes male traits such as self-assurance, confidence, and aggression are superior. Until we get past that childish view, we won't be honest about these issues.
4
There are plenty of hormones that are neither "male" nor "female." Your castration example is not terribly illuminating.
If there are nutritional imbalances, a lack of b vitamins and/or magnesium, for example, it can take an incredible toll on the central nervous system in times of hormonal imbalance, because the adrenal glands are a sort of back-up when hormones are out of whack. So it becomes more of a neural problem, than an hormonal one. I think that's a really important distinction. However, just because you're more passionate about something than usual, it doesn't mean your opinion should be invalidated. If male doctors were less anxious to dominate their female patients, they might take the time to update the old and sexist information they use as a means to control women every day in their practices.
16
All people have hormones--yes, that's true. And yes, I object to people dismissing women as being 'hormonal.' But let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater. As someone who has gone through menopause, I'd assert we women have more of an "ebb and flow" in mood because of flux in hormones.
I am far steadier and less 'moody' than I was while I went through my menstrual cycle. I really like it--I like the steadiness; it feels sort of like maybe one week into my period, all the time. But there's no denying that, say, during pregnancy, during nursing, during PMS, etc., we're more volatile. We can't have our cake and eat it too-we can't joke about eating ice cream, getting depressed, and, on the serious side, suffering from post-partum emotional trauma--and on the other side, deny it exists.
We can embrace who we are. We shouldn't be dismissed as 'hormonal,' & men have hormones--but we should also be proud that we have a variety of moods depending in part on where we are in our reproductive cycle. I can still function quite well, thank you. But I'm not the same as a man (thank you :-)
88
I'll take women's hormonal fluctuations over testosterone poisoning any day. One may lead to "emotional women", the other to violence and war.
3
Thank you for this comment, d. I love the line where you say that menopause feels like week one of your old menstrual cycle. As a woman in my forties I have a little fear about what menopause will really be like (and most of the older women I know won’t talk about it). Week one doesn’t sound too bad.
We are ALL hormonal. Yes, women are hormonal. Men are hormonal too, just in different ways. There is not enough awareness and public acceptance of the deep and broad impact of hormones on everyone.
Women have just been the hormone scapegoats. Both men and women need to acknowledge their lack of control over the impact of hormones. Ask transgender people, they feel it most acutely when they change their hormones.
30
There is no one size that fits all women on this. Individual women often are not even the same every month.
We need to keep perspective. A guy whose team lost the game last night can be worse all day, especially if he bet heavily. A guy who tried to be weekend warrior can limp around feeling sorry for himself for days. Guys can be victims of a bit of intentional needling, to go testosterone nuts. Let's not even discuss the hangover guys.
How do those things compare to women? Ah, we are all different, and all have weaknesses. The most vulnerable are the ones who don't know their own weaknesses. Those tend to be the men.
44
I find an excellent beer or a run is an excellent cure fore my wife’s hormonal episodes!
30
thankyou. The key is knowing when a hormonal episode is going on. Too many times it happens and i realize only in hind site. If i only knew in the moment then some really ugly points in our relationship would be averted.
Most likely, it is for her as well.
3
Throughout history, when men get hormonal wars start and bombs drop. Just saying.
3
The vernacular use of the word "hormonal" has been weaponized against women for centuries. I remember as a young adult having this thrown at me by my parents or someone at school to dismiss the validity of what I was saying or emotions I was feeling. I remember having this word hurled out by colleagues toward me and other women early in my career as a way to dismiss our ambition, assertiveness our lack of polite acquiescence to whatever they were asserting. Men taking a strong stance about anything are commanding (or perhaps irrational) - what they aren't is "hysterical" or "hormonal." We've had a week discussing whether a certain word used by Samantha Bee is offensive, sexist, etc. You can call me that word any day of the week - but don't ever dismiss me or my words as being "hormonal."
165
No doubt about it, human males and females have lots of similar and different kinds of hormones, and hormones can affect behavior, attitudes and emotions.
I had two sisters, numerous girlfriends and a first wife, all of whom at various times shared with me how much they hated their periods due to the pain and the emotional ups and downs they experienced. My second wife hated her periods and, as happens with so many women, had prominent emotional and mood swings just before and during menopause. And, of course, there is the well-known and well-documented phenomenon of post-partum depression among new mothers.
However, it is not belittling or sexist to make these observations, which are well documented though perhaps not well understood. Of course, men are also subject to hormonal influences on behavior, attitudes and emotions. However, the triggers for these reactions may be harder to study and understand because they are not linked to obvious phenomena like menstruation, menopause and birth.
2
Donald John Trump is hysterical and hormonal.
Michelle Robinson Obama is neither.
Henry VIII was hysterical and hormonal.
Queen Elizabeth I was neither.
8
Never have.
However, I've heard lots of women say men are ruled by their hormones.
To some extent, we all are.
10
By her hormones to some extent, yes.
Men are ruled by their "hormones" just as much as women are (and I say that as a male physician). Basic human behavior - "human nature" as people say - is all biology. Certainly the biggest cause of all the wars through the ages is the male hormone testosterone and it continues to be at the root of most of the conflict in the world.
I don't get the point of this column. On the one hand, the author is complaining about being typecast as another "hormonal female", but then goes on to describe the various hormones and how they affect both sexes.
25
Correct. She is saying that women are said to be controlled by their hormones in a derogatory fashion, but men are not, even though both men and women are affected by hormones. This is just like women are said to be emotional in their reactions and men are not, even though men are equally emotional (though those emotions, because of conditioning, are more likely to be channeled into "acceptable" expressions like anger).
The point is that the vernacular use of "hormonal" often has nothing to do with an actual clinical understanding of how hormones are operating in a given context.
3
The point is that humans are filled with a variety of hormones that basically make is function. But only women are referred to as “hormonal” which is really just saying we are hysterical. And it’s frustrating and annoying to have your thoughts discounted as the thoughts of a raging hormonal woman when all of us, men and women, have hormones pulsing through our veins all the time.
4
estrogen is different than testosterone.the effects are different for a reason. estrogen creates concern, sometimes fear and uncertainty and maybe that is for the children under a woman watch.
testosterone created certainty, confidence, fearlessness and maybe is a bad for the world.
how many times do have we heard this scenario?
" how could you let " whomever child " be left alone while you played " whatever sport" . Nothing happened . The child is fine . " but they could have fallen or choked or run out in the street or have been kidnapped "
" but they are fine and learned to be independent "
" but what if something happened ?'
That is what my dad said when my Mother left us alone.
She had too much testosterone .
9
Thsnk you! That could have been my parents, also dad and Mother.
2
@Jose
Good summary. Laughed. Thanks.
PS: Your last line with the fun twist was the same with my parents. Sadly, I'm a testosterone-lacking mother, now grandmother, whose countless cautions are wisely challenged by confident offspring.
Nothing wrong with being "hormonal", Female mood swings are very real, that is biology, men can understand that. There is an excellent book on this topic "The Female Brain" by Louann Brizendine. M.D., this book explains in scientific but simple terms how and why hormones do rule the woman’s mind, body, and emotions from birth until the day she dies. Luckily there are ways to cope up with hormonal swings, that range from medication to meditation.
19
Yes, and hormones control men's minds, bodies and emotions as well.
The point the author was making is that "hormonal" is used to dismiss a woman's words, actions and concerns in a way that it is not used for men.
Kind of like "emotional", as if a man's actions in putting a fist through the wall or beating or killing someone is not "emotional".
As for "coping" with mood swings - this is part of life and not unique to women. Men are not paragons of rationality, no matter how they try to position themselves as such.
93
Unfortunately, it seems that you have never yet found a book that explains "in scientific but simple terms how and why hormones do rule the man’s mind, body, and emotions from birth until the day he dies."
Because even though men's reactions are similar to women's hormones and emotions, women's hormones do not lead them to physically abuse, mutilate and murder their partners, as men's do.
It would be a service to men, and the entire human race, if some genius could somehow encode and impart how and why men's hormones cause such damage and mayhem.
Civilized men of the world, we're waiting on you for the usual authority and guidance!
3
I'm glad that "The Female Brain" is scientific but simple, so my female brain can understand it.
1
Thank you for writing this article. I've heard the word "hormonal" used as a substitute for opinionated, vocal, challenging, postpartum, sensitive, hungry, frustrated and any number of other terms, especially in the work environment. I work at a hospital, so I can vouch for you that medical personnel are not immune from this terminology misuse, just as Dr. Epstein describes in her experience.
91
Excellent article.
I've been a nurse over a third of a century and like every other human, for that matter every other mammal, I have plenty of hormones.
18
agreed that men also have hormones - too much testosterone triggers too much macho aggressiveness - but adrenaline triggers the fast-acting fight or flight response we need for everyday survival - which strong men tend to be proud of.
that said - as a guy recalling how an ex-girlfriend's PMT mood swings at 'that time of the month' changed what was acceptable and not mentioned as a problem the rest of the month into 'now I'm wrong/bad/evil/the worst person in the world and everything was totally my fault'
that involved a lot of walking away shaking my head. Just sayin'.
21
I used to try to explain it to my (now ex) husband this way. Some of the things he did annoyed me (watching TV constantly, never putting his things away), but he didn't seem to notice my calm requests for change, and because the total stress evoked by them didn't exceed my level of tolerance, I let it go.
When I had my period, the additional stress brought on by (hormone related) physical symptoms like sleep disturbance, constant nagging pain, and occasional migraines, increased my total level of stress. When he then did the annoying things, my level of tolerance was exceeded and I would then get angry with him.
But he never seemed to understand this. He insisted that "all of a sudden" his refusal to turn the TV down or off for an hour or two, or put his dishes in the dishwasher, etc. became annoying when they were "fine" before.
Sigh.
agreed - that's the way the PMT girlfriend used to explain it - what I did was always annoying, she just didn't raise it until hormones pushed her to shout at me
having been raised by a very assertive mother, I was 'why can't you just ask for what you want at the time - it's not the end of the world'
standard negotiation - work out what you want, work out the best way to get it, choose the best time to ask, with your BATNA in mind, and give them reasons why they will want to do what you're asking.
No need to shout - it annoys people when you suddenly make a big deal out of it long after it first happened ...
As a man I am often at a loss when it comes to understanding certain behaviors of women in my life. I understand that hormones are integral to all people's health and functionality, not just women's. While I don't dare to use that term conversationally with women, I will admit to thinking it to myself on occasion when I'm more baffled than average. It may be a crutch, but it helps when confronted with situations I can't process. Any help will be much appreciated.
37
All people, of every age, have their good days and their bad days. That’s it.
63
As a woman, I am often at a loss when a man tries to dismiss women's behaviors "certain behaviors" as baffling when completely ignoring his own baffling behaviors.
160
Syd, I suggest, you pick up a copy of "Men are from Mars, Women from Venus." I think it will give you some insight into why women sometimes behave in a manner that we guys find puzzling.
And Pauline, that's right, we are obtuse. My favorite story along these lines is the woman who asked her Aspie husband why he never told her that he loves her; he replied, with genuine puzzlement, "But I told you that once."
We don't share and therefore don't understand all of your motivations. Just as guys have to make allowances for the needs of their partners, women have to make allowances for the fact that men aren't always sensitive to their needs, and for the fact that a man has his own needs that sometimes come into conflict with a woman's.
Relationships fail when one partner tries to place his or her own needs above those of his partner, rather than trying to accommodate them as best they can.
5
Back in my youth, if I, as a woman, got angry for any reason (low pay, limited promotional opportunities despite education, ability and intelligence, being talked down to, being interrupted by men who talked to my breasts, having to ask permission or ask questions as though I were a child instead of being allowed to make a definitive statement as though I were a thinking adult, being judged entirely on my appearance, and all of the other sexist micro-aggressions), my very justifiable anger was brushed off as "hormonal." This response (almost always by men) was an obvious attempt to invalidate my complaints. Curiously (and I am being sarcastic here), being laughed at, brushed-off and ignored as "hormonal" or "suffering from PMS" or "suffering from anger-management issues," because I expressed discontent and frustration at being treated as though I just didn't matter, did not make me feel better, or understood, or heard, or respected. It just made me angrier.
59
Men say women are hormonal at any sign of behavior the man doesn't like the same way women say men are being inappropriate (a VERY charged word especially in the # MeToo era) at any sign of behavior the woman doesn't like.
Can't we all just get along?
11
What is an army but a gang of hormonal young men? The term is accurate. It only needs to be applied equally. We males are quite dangerous when hormones get us.
31
Speaking of hormones, you should see Boris when he goes on a tear. Astounding!
--Natasha
1
The term is used to demean women and excuse men's behavior, and it needs to stop. The underlying implication is that hormones control us, and we are not able to regulate our behavior rationally.
7
Except if the army was/is from Angola, Britain, Dahomey, Egypt, France, America, Israel, Japan or Vietnam. Their warriors were wonderful hormonal women.
1
Interesting column, thanks. Maybe it's a generational thing, but I can't recall ever calling women hormonal. I guess I just associate hormonal with the literal hormones doing things in our bodies.
Seems to me that chemical and physical effects can pressure us to act in certain ways. Endorphins can make us giddy or talkative, adrenaline often makes us jumpy and anxious. Low blood sugar makes people irritable or melancholy, lack of sleep will do likewise.
I think it's ok to take peoples' physical effects into account too, like I'm bound to be tense and a bit unpleasant to be around right now, as I've got two broken toes (long story), and they really hurt.
So, maybe it's ok to expect women who've just given birth to be a tad irrational, or to expect young boys hitting puberty to be awkward, aggressive, sex-crazed twerps. But we should still listen to them, factoring their effects into account, because they're still people deserving of human respect.
20
Personality differences aside, I think the most impactful measurable difference resulting from differences in sex hormones is... The thermostat setting
3
What is interesting about these 47 studies from the original article which Dr. Epstein bases her opinion on are studies that in all or most are based on questionnaires given to the women only, about how they felt during the various days of their menstrual cycle. None of the studies that I could find asked the women's partners (men or women) about their feelings concerning the mood of their woman partners during their MC. This is like asking a schizophrenic to report on the reality they observe and if they believe it is the reality that everyone else is living, without any objective observations from a professional concerning the schizophrenic.
16
What? Let me you in on a little secret. Women actually know how to meta-cognate.
10
@Julia, that may be true in some/most contexts, but regardless self-observation of psychological state is not a basis for valid scientific experimental data
Without controls there is no science. No two menstrual cycles nor women are alike.
2
Hormones influence the behavior of both men and women. That is the conclusion I get from Dr. Epstein's column. No, these powerful hormones don't make women stupid, but they do exert strong influences on how we all act, think and feel. There may not be studies, but certainly there is plenty of anecdotal evidence to indicate that all of the hormones contribute to making us changeable and changing human beings. Let scientists explore the many interrelationships effecting all living things. Let's face it – even Fido may have hormonal rhythms.
8
And then there are some of us who were so irregular that no period could ever be predicted.
"Hormones influence the behavior of both men and women."
As a male physician, I would take this a step further and say that "human nature", or basic human behavior, is guided by our biology - and that includes hormones. It is a result of behaviors being selected for (survival of the fittest) eons ago in our evolution to the point that the biology that produced and influenced that behavior was imprinted onto our genetic material. our DNA.
Certainly testosterone influences the behavior of males just as much as hormonal shifts influence the behavior of women, and, unfortunately, continues to play a huge role in our politics. In fact, I would say that our current president is "testerical".
1
I am about as convinced that hormonal fluctuations have no affect on mood as I am that weather has no affect on joint pain. Studies deny the link, but my knees hurt when rain is coming.
And for 30 years I got a migraine monthly. Every 27 days.
What is wrong, is not the recognition that that hormonal changes can drive mood changes, changes in pain levels, or any other short term affect. What is wrong is the judgement that somehow the woman is weaker, crazier, out of control because of it.
Let's face it. Many women have hormonal changes frequently in their lives. Yet women rarely are the ones who snap and shoot a family member or go on gun rampages. Women are not usually arrested on road rage charges. You rarely hear of women who stalk and stab a lover after a break-up.
Sure, we might have very little ability to hide impatience with utter stupidity a few times are year. But that doesn't translate to crazy. Impatience and even irritation are rational responses to stupidity, thoughtlessness, and such. People should be grateful for all the days we are able to suppress and filter it out, not worried about the days we don't.
59
Wasn't it lovely when you realized that, hey, I haven't had a migraine for a while? Worth hitting menopause, which wasn't a big deal anyway.
So the people around you, most of whom you choose to be around, are stupid all the time, but there are a few times a year when that utter stupidity deserves a week or so of venom spewing rage. A perfectly appropriate way to treat the ones you claim to love. They should be thankful that, despite your intellectual superiority, you are patient and kind to the bumbling fools the rest of the time.
1
As a pre-natal male victim (labeled a "DES son") of the first use of DES (look it up) in women experiencing a "difficult" labor (and other problems); a nasty endocrine system disruptor that now, in my old age (all of my life, actually) is causing major imbalances in my hormones, I am exquisitely aware of the effect of hormones on behaviors.
What DES causes in males over their lifetime is unknown (no long term longitudinal studies) because its effects on females is so devastating that monies were poured into studies of their and their mother's plights.
Today, it is known that even though DES is not used as it was, other, similar, hormone disruptors run rampant in our environment and everyone is exposed to them ... daily. We are figurativey swimming in them. And, their effects on everyone, especially the young, are very real. And frightening.
Take some time to learn about hormone disruptors and how they get into you. If you go on the web, make sure you go to legitimate sources such as the NIH, University of Chicago, etc. and avoid bogus sites that will mislead you or try to sell you some cure.
16
I can only point to my own experiences here. Once my girlfriend went into a towering rage for doing something she had given me permission to do. Later she apologized, “sorry. I had some chocolate and it sent me over the edge. I shouldn’t eat it when I’m having my period.” I have a colleague with a good friend who lives in a hotel for about one week a month because his wife, by her own admission, is impossible to deal with while she’s menstruating.
It does no good for women to complain that men are using “hormonal” for “stupid” or some such substitution, as I have read in comments here. There are simply some (and I work happily and fruitfully with many women who never show any sign of this) who set rationality aside for a time, with regularity. If we said instead, more accurately, that “your hormone levels are surging and changing rapidly and it’s having a negative effect on your emotions and thinking”, would that do? Because I sense it is simply the truth.
Ask any man what his worst experiences with women have been, and I am certain that most will answer with similar stories.
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Ask any woman (or man) what their worst experience with men have been and it is likely to be threats of violence or actual violence.
Get back to me when we are reluctant to elect male leaders because we are afraid of the damage they'd do in a testosterone fueled rage.
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So what do you have to say about the hormonal hysteria of Donald Trump?
Just ask Melania, Ivana, Marla and Stormy.
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"Ask any man what his worst experiences with women have been, and I am certain that most will answer with similar stories."
Your comment just goes to show how rooted the prejudices are, in both men and women.
What about having told your girlfriend to not use chocolate and her period as an excuse for her "towering rage." If she had been arrested as a result of her rage, the police or the judge would not have waived the fine on her being "hormonal." People need to act rationally and, when they don't, assume full responsibility, and not blame it on other people or other things (hormones, alcohol, Ambien, the cat, etc.).
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