My father was one of these patriarchs. He had a horrible temper and a big disgusting mouth. He was a very successful business man with12 children 6 boys and 6 girls. My mom used to tell him that he was alienating them. She was right. Most of us left home at an extremely young age. Some of us never went back to visit for decades. Some of his sons betrayed him and robbed him. When we have a model with a single autocratic ruler, we know what to expect, a lot of pain and misery . Patriarchy has been a total failure from the beginning and continues to be. Until we do justice to both genders I don't expect much hope for the human race. I despised this power grab ever since I was a tiny girl and I still do. I promised myself that I will never get married or have children unless this horrible practice ended. I have always commended respect from all the males I ever met including my own father. I was the only kid he asked forgiveness from before he passed away . I never went back to visit or attended his funeral. I am very much like him with the kindness I inherited from my mom. If there is any hope for humanity, patriarchy has to go the way of the dinosaurs. I have zero tolerance for abuse and I have no regrets about standing up to him. I was the kid he was the adult.He should have known better.
17
One more nail in the coffin. The Christian church has almost nothing to do with the teachings of Jesus and everything to do with control, power, and wealth. "Wives be submissive to your husbands" was written by Saul (Paul) a man who tried to destroy the teaching of Jesus. When that didn't work, he decided to subvert them from the inside.
The modern christian church is a hoax and a shame in the face of God. The saddest part is the cost to the human race caused by the subjugation of women for 2000 years.
10
Let me make another comment on this subject: what my very Presbyterian father told me, before my marriage, "If he beats you, come home!
7
First, please define “assault”, then please define “intimate”. Then please continue from there and see where that goes. This article is just bashing religion. Anyone who’s been around roosters and hens and seen their sex, shouldn’t have sex then. It’s their choice.
The patriarchal model of marriage is clearly the oldest one. It mandates the supremacy, of the husband-father in the family. In 1AD, in the Roman Empire, this model was the law of the land and gave the husband absolute authority over his wife, children, and slaves—even the power of life or death. This was the context in which the Bible had developed.
Today, authoritarian males should remember that the Bible teaches marriage as a sacred arrangement, whereby BOTH parties should respect and honour each other, with love, forgiveness, and kindness. So aggressive behaviour shown towards a spouse does not demonstrate such.
When discussing how a Christian man should treat his wife, the apostle Peter wrote: “Show her honour as a fellow heir of the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7). So male Christians are expected to treat Christian females with respect and honour, because they are fellow heirs of the grace of life. It is not surprising therefore, that the most venerated Saint in Christendom is a female.
7
I went to a Lutheran Church of America affiliate in junior high and part of high school. It turned out that the pastor, who was married with children, was having affairs with multiple married women in the congregation! It must have started with private counseling sessions.
11
Yah, even if your faith community preaches equality, abusive men can still get away with it.
I guess we all know, too, that infidelity is also abuse: mental, emotional and physical abuse, which is also seen among the church-going good people.
5
Having lived long, I remember observing churches in the l960s and early 70s. Churches were mostly dwindling and mostly filled with older females. Then the feminist movement came into the light along with high inflation and the oil embargo. Women started working outside the home because the families needed the money.
Evangelical churches started preaching against feminism and for male power over women. Suddenly men started going to church again.
So many males like certain churches BECAUSE they promote male dominance, especially within the family.
Christianity has been used as a power structure since Constantine converted.
16
Constantine was the first emperor to stop the persecution of Christians and to legalise Christianity along with all other religions and cults in the Roman Empire.
1
I get so disappointed when people stop reading their Bibles too soon. Sure, it says wives should submit to their husbands, but that's not the end of the passage (nor is it even applicable to the crimes presented here). Quite a bit more verbiage is dedicated to instructing the husband on his responsibilities, which aren't exactly without weight.
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies."
There's a huge responsibility being assigned, and in no way would any of the despicable acts referred to in this article pass the test or even be defensible.
My apologies to any woman who has been fed the lie that she deserved it or the man had any right to it: that's not christian. That's not biblical. That's not right.
17
When discussing how a Christian man should treat his wife, the apostle Peter wrote, “Show her honour as a fellow heir of the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7).
3
It should not be surprising that clergy themselves are frequent abusers. Do they go into the ministry because they want to be closer to God or more likely, they like the worship that they get which is frequently undeserved? People refer to them with exalted titles and give them benefits they don't deserve. They stand up week after week a tell people how to live their lives. Until fairly recently they were above suspicion. With all this "idol" worship they come to believe they can do no wrong, even when their judgment is questioned, like the Southern Baptist leader who would not back down. His apologies were hollow because he doesn't believe he's wrong. Every religious group has some clergy with a god complex. Unfortunately, women raised in this environment are taught not to question the authority, which is a big part of the problem.
12
We seem to forget some basic facts of biology. Everyone who has ever lived has done do because a woman allowed us to occupy her body for 9 montes while we transformed from a fertilized egg into a creature able to exist on our own only needing her to feed us for a period of time.
Second we have all gotten half of our DNA from our mothers so what gives men the "right" to abuse women? I should state that I am a male.
8
Thank goodness someone is speaking out about this issue. My parish knew /knows of my ex-husband's emotional abuse and good people who care about a wide range of social issues have not done anything. i am ovewhelmed by the feeling of being let down by the one organization that is supposed to provide shelter, refuge, support and should take action. Every other issue gets addressed by this parish, even the rehabilitation of murderers. But no one in the church wants to address misogyny, spousal and child abuse (and in my ex-husband's case, parental abuse.) It's time for #MeToo to have a religious moment.
15
Agreed. But to keep in mind that this issue is not only found within Christianity.
For example Islam allows "chastisement" by a husband to his wife and the chastisement of minor children. So long as the physical act does not exceed the limits prescribed by Sharia (Islamic) law. This religious principle even finds its way into the law - for example, Law Article 56 of the United Arab Emirates (UAE) Personal Status Code states that women must "obey" their husbands.
2
When I was a teenager, I was told that if I wore a mini skirt and was raped, it was my fault. Men/Boys cannot control themselves, and of course could never be held accountable - so it was our fault. This was a mainstream evangelical religion, and to this day they state women must 'submit' to men
A relative who was in this church was married to a man who, at the age of 26, had sex with a 16 year old girl. Instead of reporting him to the authorities, she was told she needed to work to save her marriage. If she couldn't, and ended up divorcing, she would always be married to that monster, in the eyes of God, and could never remarry. She eventually did remarry, after dealing with incredible guilt. In yet another example of hypocrisy, the man she married became an evangelical minister. My relative was his third wife, yet - in spite of preaching that divorce is a sin - exceptions were made for those deemed sufficiently 'holy', such as him.
This same church will not allow gays to join, stating being gay is a sin. Of course, every credible medical society states being gay is not a choice . Even if it were a sin, they conveniently overlook their own sins - greed, gluttony, dishonesty, love of money, etc. Perhaps this sounds familiar? Perfectly describes the man they have chosen to blindly follow, even as he destroys our country. For them, the end justifies the means. To pose a question they formerly asked - "What would Jesus do?' Shame on you all
10
Humanity is corrupt and so it corrupts the true teaching of the Bible. In fact many people seem to get confused between what the faith teaches and what they derive from social fads and norms.
1
Does anyone really expect better behavior from a patriarchy, at this stage in the game?
7
in reply to Michael...
"How could the earth have been created in seven
days?"
One day with the Lord is as a thousand years with
man.
2
The Book of Genesis is the first book of the Hebrew Bible (the Tanakh) and the Old Testament. It can be divided into two parts, the Primeval history (chapters 1–11) and the Ancestral history (chapters 12–50). Genesis is a type of literature telling of the first appearance of humans, the stories of ancestors and heroes, and the origins of culture, cities and so forth. It’s interesting that Genesis explains the creation sequence of - the cosmos, earth, flora, fauna, and humans in the correct sequence as verified by scientists today. Yet estimates indicate Genesis was written in about the 6th century BC.
1
There's a reason sexually assaulting women and children didn't make it into the Ten Commandments...but a man coverting his neighbor's wife is a big sin. This omission alone explain why Christianity can NEVER respect women, or grant women equal rights with men. In fact, in the Roman Catholic Church, if a woman is beaten up by her husband and divorces him, SHE is the sinner.
3
Not really correct. When discussing how a Christian man should treat his wife, the apostle Peter wrote, “Show her honour as a FELLOW heir of the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7).
It is not surprising therefore, that the most venerated Saint in Christendom is a female.
1
As a Presbyterian Church (USA) pastor who worked with batterers during seminary, I am thankful for Ms. Baird's work. Mainline Protestant seminaries have been teaching pastors about these issues for at least a generation. I was taught that a batterer breaks the marriage covenant; therefore, the abused spouse is guiltless when they choose to depart.
If you are in an abusive relationship, speak up; get help; and get out. If you feel your pastor will not be sympathetic to your situation, contact the closest domestic violence shelter which will guide you and not judge you.
God is love. Violence is not love. God wants your violence to end. Taking steps to be safe does not contradict God's will. Ensuring safety, healing, blessing, and peace is what God wants for everyone -- and everyone definitely includes YOU.
20
Mate guarding is common in many animal communities. Most people are familiar with harem mating systems, where a male monopolizes the females as if they were a precious resource, which they are.
It is no wonder that mate guarding has been institutionalized in religious tradition. Religious tradition normalizes aggressive behavior that is shaped by the same forces that drive males of different species to dominate their females as well as other males.
I am not appealing to nature's example to justify such behavior in human societies. That would be seeking permission using the naturalistic fallacy. But if we are to reduce this sort of antisocial behavior, we need to recognize that biology is its source and realize it will take a concerted effort by our society to mitigate and control its pernicious effects.
3
In most societies there is at least one group of people who are never believed when it comes to physical or mental abuse: women. Women are not believed when they complain of pain, are ill, or are worried about their children. Children are another group who aren't believed when they complain about being abused. Nor are handicapped people.
The idea that anyone wants to be abused, asks for it, or deserves it has no place in a discussion about it or whether ot not the accusation should be believed. No one wants to be beaten to within an inch of their life. No one wants to be strangled, slapped until their ears ring, etc.
There is nothing in the Old Testament or the New Testament that says beating or killing your spouse is the right way to treat her. If a man or any rabbi or minister or priest wants to interpret it that way they have no business counseling anyone or dealing with human beings or other animals.
Love is not fostered by injuring another. Love is the feeling that warms your heart, hands, and your soul.
16
Thank you, thank you Hen3ry.
3
I guess we women need to end the wrong practice, don't we? We have to be organized, and be savvy, to protect women from abuse in the faith communities. Savvy, because there will be backlash, so plan for it, and plan around it.
3
Shayna makes an interesting comment below, on her experience.
1
I am a moderately left-wing non-Christian who wanted to find out for myself what the conservative churches are like, post 2016 election. So I went to different churches, and settled on a medium sized Baptist church and a non-denominational megachurch. I joined groups (actually I'm still in a women's group that has lasted over a year). I talked to people. So what did I experience?
Some amazing women who stand up for themselves, who are compassionate and intelligent, and seek out women who are in difficult situations to help. I did not hear anyone tell any woman she need stay with an abusive spouse, and nobody was shamed for divorce. The Baptist church has a poster in the ladies' room warning women that that men who abuse them in the name of scripture are wrong and listed resources to help them out of that situation. All of this was an eye-opening experience and doesn't seem to mesh with the narrative I kept hearing in the liberal churches and circles I traveled in before my continuing experiment. Actually I was rather amused that I didn't hear talk of politics, something some of the more liberal churches I went to couldn't shut up about. What I did hear in the conservative churches was how to make myself a better person, and so many resources for families and community.
I heard things that I don't agree with, but that happens with any group. I am skeptical of those try to paint entire groups and institutions with broad strokes as a result of this experience.
9
Good luck on convincing conservative religious leaders to not be sexist and refrain from encouraging violence against women. My earliest memory of church is a sermon about the sin of Eve and how women are not to be trusted. I was five. I became an atheist 11 years later, after reading the Bible straight through and attending Sunday school and asking questions that were met with disturbing responses. I sometimes miss the hymns and community, but never the sexism that permemated the faith like a cloud. The Bible was clearly written to reinforce the existing power structures. I cannot believe it speaks for God.
To paraphrase Susan B. Anthony, I distrust those who say they speak for God, as I have found God's commandments often coincide with their desires.
19
“The wife has to submit.” So says some of the world’s dominant religions like Christianity, Islam, and Hinduism. The scriptures of these religions which place women in a subservient position - the Bible and the book of Mormon, the Koran, and the Vedas - are all elaborate metaphors that are mistaken for reality.
We are chained to metaphor as we attempt to navigate the world. For example, language and math are metaphors that allow us to represent reality and to delineate patterns in it in a way we can understand. The key is to recognize that metaphors are representations – sometimes clumsy and inadequate – that attempt to describe the physical and intangible. They are not reality, only human-made approximations of it.
But metaphors are a slippery slope, and are often appropriated and exploited beyond their linguistic capabilities. This has always been problematic in religions. But it is particularly problematic in these times of alternative reality and facts.
The stories in the Bible are metaphors – they are not reality. If you believe that a supreme being created the world in seven days, then you are abusing a metaphor. If you believe the Bible gives you license to rape, assault, financially control, and emotional abuse women, you have slipped into an alternative reality fueled by metaphor abuse.
Metaphors are abused because they benefit someone. In this case the benefit goes to the male power structure, which is really what most religions are concerned with.
20
My mother went to the Catholic were her story of abuse - my father hitting her but more often hitting the children (me and my sisters). She also complained of his erratic behavior, bad economic decisions, etc. Basically the Church provided counseling support but reminded her that the father is head of the household, divorce is a sin, communion will be withheld. She found better advice through the Paulist Center and eventually divorced but things got much worse before that happened.
Thinking about the pedophilia scandal that the Church still hasn't truly addressed, backward and unhealthy advice is still offered by the clergy. The Church needs to address this urgently. Forgiveness is a wonderful thing. But do you forgive the abuser only to end up not being able to forgive yourself because you didn't stop the abuse?
17
If a husband / father is abusive, and a good man is needed to mentor him, often such a man can't be found!!!
1
When my 7 yr old son, who attended a catholic school, was experiencing emotional difficulty due to victimization by my abusive, alcoholic husband, I visited the Mother Superior in hopes of finding an ally to alleviate my child's pain. I was given a prayer card and told to work it out.
I did. I am now an atheist, my son has a son to whom he is a wonderful compassionate father, and my daughter has two lovely girls who recognize abuse when they see it at have learned the "Christian" Golden Rule of treating others as you would wish to be treated. We have found more compassion in Care Bears than in religion.
38
When we talk about religion’s part in in determining gender roles and promoting male dominance, we have to address a chicken-and-egg scenario: which came first in determining gender roles - sociobiological factors or religion? At this point we don’t know. It’s not impossible that the development of each force was simultaneous and reciprocal. Certainly, early humans were not intellectually sophisticated enough to talk about gender roles in the way that science talks about them today: biological determinism and human nature vs. cultural determinism and social constructs. But, since we do have this vocabulary today, religion seems an atavistic throwback to determining gender roles.
So why does it persist? Likely, because religion is not about (if it ever was) religion or gender, and more about raw power and who has it.
Overwhelmingly, religions came to be male power structures. To justify and secure power for males, religions had to create and promote dogmatic foundations that seemed to “prove” male dominance. The result was the fantastical myths in, for example, the Bible, Koran, and Book of Mormon, that prop up the notion of male dominance. These documents are basically social management guides that use psychology and emotion to control their members. The key to their power is that they are anchored in divine sanction. So gender relations according to these religions are divinely determined, thus conveniently (for men) taking the arrangement out of human hands.
18
As regards 'which came first' there is some indication in historical records. The patriarchal model of marriage is clearly the oldest one. It mandates the supremacy, of the husband-father in the family. And in the Roman Empire, this model was the law of the land and gave the husband absolute authority over his wife, children, and slaves—even the power of life or death. This was the social context in which the New Testament occurred.
4
My abusive ex-husband was (is) a full-time church organist and choir leader (Lutheran) who claimed to love Jesus and his teachings with his whole heart and soul.
I don't think Jesus would have approved of my bruises (both physical and emotional).
26
I wonder to what extent religion is responsible for the “macho” cultures in Central America. If churches would make a coordinated effort to preach and practice equality between the genders, they would help deter domestic violence.
Many females who grow up in families with “macho" fathers and brothers unconsciously learn that this is how men are supposed to act. Without realizing it, they may look for partners who are also “macho”, in that the men think nothing of throwing their wives and girlfriends around. If a female leaves her partner to escape the abuse, there is a good chance she will eventually partner with another abusive man because deep down, she thinks that this behavior is normal, and perhaps even desirable. Many females cannot seem to help dating and marrying one abusive male after another. The "macho" culture seems to be ingrained in them.
The Central American churches could make a long lasting commitment to change this dynamic, knowing it would take a couple of generations.
9
When discussing how a Christian man should treat his wife, the apostle Peter wrote, “Show her honour as a fellow [equal] heir of the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7).
2
"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning."
~ William Boyd "Bill" Watterson II
27
It just seems that people -- if they're constantly being shown horror shows by news and television, in a country whose president brags about seductions he's engaged in -- can't resist engaging in the same abuses they're being presented. Just going to church on Sunday won't remove from their spongy souls notions that self-gratifaction is a right that supercedes respect of others. The more frequent the incidents of cruelty depicted (and even condemned) the more these abuses are likely to occur. I've decided not to watch The Daily Trump Show.
8
I know a professional counselor who mainly counsels clergy. He told me that one of the only ways clergy know how to say "no" to God, "this is mine and I'm not surrendering it" is by sexual misdeeds.
Too often, clergy don't know how to find balance in their life by taking care of their mental health.
PS: Ironically, I grew up in First Baptist Dallas when Paige Patterson was young and a pastor there. I remember him, and sadly, am not surprised by his behavior.
9
I can believe that. There is a 'be subservient to God' thing whereby people lose perspective that they need to embrace self direction, personal responsibility and their individual free will. Having been brought up Catholic, I dabbled in evangelical churches for a while when I got older, but I left because I began to feel unwell mentally. I began to literally FEEL the mental imbalance the teachings promoted. I am now an agnostic and fully well.
7
Very insightful observation from the clergy counselor. And your solution is right on: find balance by taking care of your own mental health.
3
There is no established church or religious organization that benefits or favors women in any way. women should abandon churches, especially evangelical or orthodox style religions. without them as congregants most religious organizations would dry up and blow away. as they should.
36
The Unitarian Universalist Church, of which I am a proud long-time member, values and supports men and women equally. A high proportion of our clergy are women.
10
Within mainstream Christianity, the most venerated Saint in Christendom is a female.
When discussing how a Christian man should treat his wife, the apostle Peter wrote, “Show her honour as a fellow [equal] heir of the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7).
3
I think there is a solution to this problem, albeit one that will take time. I bet if a study is done of male abuse of women by religious sect, it will show that the least amount of domestic male violence is in churches that have women in dominant roles. Lots of women.
I also think this is the solution to the problem of government. At present there aren't enough women bringing clear-headed judgment, compassion, benevolence right-mindedness to human problems.
C'mon, ladies!
11
Thank you for this work. The church community I grew up in bars female clergy. Little surprise, then, that sexual assault and domestic violence is rampant.
11
One important factor that's often left out of these discussions is the link between domestic violence and corporal punishment. Studies have established a clear correlation, and it's not hard to see why they would go hand in hand. So many children learn at a very early age to associate infliction of pain with being loved and cared for--along with a message of "serves you right" that our society still more often than not affirms. For some, harsh spankings (or worse) from esteemed or beloved authority figures may continue through their teenage years and even early adulthood. (School paddling from K-12 remains legal in the public schools of 19 states and in the private schools of all but two.) For all the messages these kids may later receive that striking one's partner is horribly wrong, that early conditioning can be hard to shake once they enter adult relationships.
Unfortunately, certain religious leaders have compounded this problem by preaching "chastisement" as an exercise in godliness, and penitent acceptance of it as a virtue.
10
Since 2016 we have known, of course, about the hypocrisy of most evangelicals and other fervent Christians in their supporting the lying bullying cheating serial adulterer who opccupies the White House.
But now their personal hypocrisy is being "shouted from the rooftops." And listen to them squeal, just like their president!
It's about time!
36
The Christian denominations in Australia have been slow to ordain woman and recognize their equal role in the church. As a female minister in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, many of our pastors and regional bishops, as well as our national presiding bishop are females; I don't think you're likely to ever hear in an ELCA church that women should submit to their husbands and most people would walk out if they did hear it. We're not immune turning a blind eye to atrocities on an individual basis, but we're getting there. Please don't lump all of denominations together as we are certainly not all in agreement in our approach to social issues and disagree vehemently with those who do not stand up against abuse in any form; we have not always gotten it right, but today we are on the forefront of the #metoo movement as we have no other place we should be.
10
This has been going on for a while. See the link to an article from 2009:
https://www.christianheadlines.com/news/domestic-violence-within-the-chu...
See also the article Debra Fileta from 2014:
https://www.christianity.com/christian-life/marriage-and-family/3-reason...
See also the academic article from 2004 (!!!): Nancy Nason-Clark, "When Terror Strikes at Home: The Interface between Religion and Domestic Violence," Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, 43 (2004), 303-310. (Sorry for not giving the URL, the comment be sent with 3 URLs).
This has been going on the a long time and has been studied for quite a while.
3
Not surprising that religion breeds violence against women since faith is usually based on mythology and superstition. Religion was invented by men seeking power and control. Sadly, that has not changed.
33
Can we send this to Saudi Arabia, Pakistan, and majority of the middle east?
2
" Religion Poisons Everything " - Christopher Hitchens.
Amen, Brother, Amen.
54
Like most absolute statements, that's better as a slogan than a truth. My wife is Native American, and her religion, and some kinds of Christianity--like that of MLK--and other faiths are not evil, but may indeed help people. Good and evil, as some poet said, run through the human heart, and easy answers are few.
8
While many in the church cite that bit of "scrip[ture" as being written by Paul many scholars today do not believe it was. There seems to be evidence that that section was added around 100 to 200 yeras after Paul died and it is in conflict with what Paul did write about what love was in 1 Corinthians. Then again those people ignore what Paul supposedly wrote about the husbands responsibilities.
4
Well, and there is the fact that the entire Bible is a mishmash. You could say something similar about most parts of it. So who knows what one could call "genuine" and what that would mean?
4
Lets talk about American Christians. These Pharisees routinely vote for war, environmental destruction, jail-stuffing (like no other country), and increasing poverty as they genuflect to the wealthy over and over again all the decades of my adult life. Domestic violence is not the only problem with the Christians. By the way - yes, I know its not ALL Christians. Just the majority. And why are you still hanging out with them? Have any compassion for the Christ, for Christ's sake?
27
When will we have the intellectual and ethical lucidity to combine the words Christian + terrorist ? Since 911, this represents an epistemological impossibility -- consider how Toronto law enforcement refuses to label Minassian's act of truck terrorism against mainly female victims as an act of, well, terrorism. Why ? because he is of Christian background and terrorism simply does not fit the current narrative Western society imposes upon the masses.
Instead of being so fixated on the widely scattered and distant acts of terrorism committed by the ISIS psychopaths, perhaps Westerners should shift the focus to the enemy within : rampant clergy sex abuse and reactionary views of the female roles in society, just to mention two.....
26
Church must not be confused with religion. Church congregations are apologists for things they have been taught to believe. The Tooth Fairy for lazy adults. Rabbis, Imams, Reverends, Cardinals and whatever else is used as a status elevator are ill equipped to be other than expressors of concepts. Many are liars, thieves, fornicators, child predators and every category of criminal. "They are human" some say. Any search engine readily reveals the tips of those icebergs. Just over fifty years ago I was given the statement "Religion is the opium of the people". Discuss. It was a challenge then. Four children and a couple marriages later I understand that the Churches and pastors are often used syringes and needles. You get what you take.
7
"Churches should be a refuge."
No. Churches should be abandoned altogether. All the "metoo" movement has done is highlight long-known facts: religion was created by primitive men of ancient times in an attempt to make sense of a universe beyond their comprehension. And while they were making it up, men made sure their gender alone was the sole sanctioned authority in society while also granting themselves complete control over women.
It's all spelled out in excruciating detail in the Bible and Koran, so it's long past time we call it for what it is. Men have longed used religion to dominate women, abuse them, silence their voices, block their intellectual development, and make them domestic and sexual servants. Everything these Christian creeps say can be found in the Bible. I'm not making up "wives submit yourselves to your husbands", it's there in black and white. There's just no place anymore for religion in advanced societies and the faster we dump it, the better.
If some want to continue to worship in the privacy of their homes and churches, that's fine. But it's way past time to end religion's privileged status in society. It has no place in science, law, politics, public education, and public policy. Tax exemption should end and the merging of church and state that's being forced upon the unwilling majority must be stopped. The current chaos is not so much due to globalism as it is to religion unwilling to cede power that's no longer warranted or justified.
48
Very well stated
3
In a similar vein, snake oil preaching Jerry Falwell used to defend segregation from the pulpit. Far right religions in the US also dictate that the husband is the patriarch of the family and women are duty bound to comply.
Far right fundamentalist religion is a sacred cow that needs a trip to the slaughterhouse.
32
Not far from here in the Archdioces of Chicago, America's largest Catholic community serving several millions, we have a very similar story. A coworker married to a compulsive gambler whose rapacious greed induced him to liquidate all his assets and then to coerce the same from his spouse, including all her retirement money and any inheritances from her parents and others, was told this: that divorce was a worse offense in God's eyes than homicide. She has witnessed the destruction of their joint assets and has on occasion gone begging for the money to pay their house note. The husband is a swine in appearance and behavior who abuses the youngest son physically, but not sexually, and has injured him and been adjudicated in state court. My wife and I are still discussing this ugly chastisement that has one basis: the greedy priest wants to ensure he has two people at least coming in to weekly Mass to tithe and support him. False teachings abound in a church that connived with child abusers for many decades and underscores the need for believers to think for themselves and eschew the so-called guidance of the priestly caste.
22
Women experiencing domestic violence who sought solace from clergy (in the case of Catholic priests, at least, talk about your unmarried marriage counselors!) used to be--and perhaps still are in places--told that an abusive husband was a burden to be accepted and to pray to God for the strength to endure because holy matrimony was so sacred that it was not to be eschewed simply because hubby's got a tamper. He's the head of the household, after all. In fact, what's now known as domestic violence, up until not too long ago, was called in the faith community "home correction," a man's prerogative.
That's why, during the prolonged debate over same-sex marriage, it was so bizarre how many women were speaking up for "traditional" marriage (you know, the kind where the wife is the husband's subordinate; the Bible says so).
8
Most religions that memetically evolved more than a century ago, before science began to understand morphogenesis, use human procreation as a central metaphor/allegory for the mystery of existence in the large ("Creation"). Christianity is the prime example. This is why Genesis is the first book of the Bible, which evangelicals teach themselves is "reality".
It's also why one of the most sacred places in the ancient Hopi/Anasazi world is called the Navel of the World (a hot spring in the Grand Canyon where humans were believed to originally emerged, as if birthed into the world).
The worship of human reproduction, and its use as the central religious metaphor, from conception to birth, is thus ultimately the basis of religious misogyny, given that historically nearly all religions have been created by the male of the species, naturally treating the magically gestating female as the "other" to be controlled.
The Catholic Church tells its women adherents that abortion is a mortal sin. But it turns out that these women have abortions at the same rate as the population at large. So the Church has post-abortion counseling sessions to help these women with their "shame". Is not the appropriate descriptive term for this kind of mental abuse "gaslighting"?
The ultimate religious sin is to willingly allow others to be harmed because you are too afraid to confront the fact that your religious doctrine, having been created by nothing more than other people, is morally flawed.
12
Violence perpetrated by men against women and claiming to be Christians....Jesus would denounce them. Their despicable behavior has nothing to do with the message of Jesus. It has everything to do with inadequate men hiding behind religion to cover up their evil behavior. I know a man who sits in the front pew every Sunday who fits this category. I had an experience with a Episcopalian minister, in a powerful position, when I was in my 20's. My husband was in Viet Nam. I, by virtue of my innocence of his intentions, was lucky...it turned out that 6 women in the congregation were no so lucky. (He "counseled" them.) He was sent off to a different congregation. The last 3 priests in the Catholic Church in my town were removed because they molested boys. Religion is often used as the cover for male abuse of women! Protect the institution but NOT the women.
13
"Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct." 1 Peter 3.
Domestic violence, by men, is authorized by the Bible. Women's silence is also authorized by the Bible as a way to assure men's power.
Such arrogance is incompatible with democracy. Such use of silence is tantamount to conspiracy to break laws against violence. If you know a violent crime is or was being committed, and refuse to speak up because you reap benifits from the crime, (e.g., the power of the church, a favor from God) you are also guilty of a civil crime and can enjoy your martyrdom for eternity, but in our earthly jails and accept charity from the taxpayers for food, shelter, and TV, for as long as your sentence lasts.
7
It also says, in the exact same chapter of 1 Peter, "Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect."
And likewise in Ephesians 5: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."
And in Colossians 3: "Husbands love your wives and do not be harsh with them."
The Bible doesn't condone domestic violence. It's just that most people conveniently ignore those verses instructing husbands.
10
No one should ever be put in a position of dominance over another. Especially men over women. One cannot use the excuse that it's alright, because men are then told to be respectful. Human nature is what it is - those who feel God has empowered them to dominate others will use that power to abuse, be it emotionally or physically. The men of this world are not perfect and god-like. The evangelicals are giving them license to abuse women, and to raise daughters yo also feel they're not worthy, and must submit to whatever men wish. This fuels the misogyny that we're all seeing today. It's always been there, especially in the church, but thanks to the #MeToo movement, the ugliness of the church is being exposed
1
This treatment of women pretty much minimizes the distance between abusive christianity and the criticisms of conservative Islam which covers women from head to toe and hides them from public view and accuses them of inciting rape when a bare ankle is seen by a male who is not her husband.
Abuse, rape and submission are the common element.
7
Per writer Mary McCarthy (supposedly): ' Religion makes good people better and bad people worse.' My less charitable view:
it's a testimony to the ignorance & primitivism of our species.
10
Not surprised that the report "was greeted with defensive fury". Nobody likes their dirty little secrets to get out. Others don't want their image of their church damaged. Having your church give an OK to rape is hard to deal with. Think of the response to the Catholic Church and the priests' assaults on children. And think of all the Catholics who are still in denial about the crimes.
12
Probably the cruelest religious comment can be found in the Old Testament,& carried through to Christianity & Islam, is that Gay love is an abomination.This has become an eternal curse on the Gay community, and the cause of centuries of persecution & death to millions of Gay human beings. It is also a contradiction to creation.That claims God created man in his image.This contradiction is a glaring example of the thinking of ancient people who had no understanding of the anatomy of the Human being.It confirms that the scriptures were written by man & not by God.
5
Jesus himself never said gay love was an abomination, Jesus never mentioned homosexuality.
St. Paul did, though, relying on the Old Testament tradition, and the Pauline view seems to be what most (but not all) Christian religions prefer.
2
For far too many Christians their "faith" requires that they take the Bible as the literal word of God. When their "Pastor" reads and focuses on the misogyny embedded in that book uncritically, as you have to if it's the literal word of God, this is what inevitably happens. It simply cannot be prevented in this context.
9
After reading the conclusions of Gleeson's study, it is pretty clear that for more than a few religious leaders of the fundamentalist variety, that Old Testament idea of “spare the rod, spoil the child” might also read “spare the rod, and spoil the woman.”
4
I recently was on a walk and ran into a former neighbor, a Christian fundamentalist. She is the wife of a pastor, daughter of a pastor. She is obsessed with her religion and barely a sentence goes by where she does not talk about "praying" or "seeking God's wisdom," or, "her faith."
We got on the topic of divorce and I said that I thought it was a victory for women to get away from abusive, violent husbands.
And she looked away and very meekly said, "Well, no one wants anyone to get hurt," but she was "against divorce." She has said this several times. She is brain washed. Even if there is abuse, she still believes that "God can help them work it out...I believe in the power of prayer!"
So if you're bashed in the face, thrown down stairs, or attacked in the bedroom, "God can do anything," and you should not abandon your faith and stay in your marriage.
She is the most spineless, meek woman I have ever met, but she is an example of the prevailing feeling in some Christian churches - do NOT divorce, no matter what.
It sickens me. Which is why I believe, but I do not go to church. Organized religion can border on cult - like behavior/thinking especially when it concerns women, and the subservience they should agree to live under, the second class status, and the man as the "head of the household."
Christians divorce more than the general population, I think, because of these oppressive beliefs. The woman finally can't stand it - and leaves.
9
Christianity, which should be the vehicle of bringing peace and love into the world, is often used as the rationale of violence and hate. In the ranks of believers are bigots and misogynists, who purposely distort the words of the gospel to justify persecution and oppression. There is little solace in the fact that this is true of all the world's religions.
4
Churches should be a refuge, you say, but in practice it seems it may have become a refuge for sexual abusers, abusers that 'base' their actions from church teachings telling men they are pretty much free to do with women as they please.
And this seems 'dogma' (not subject to discussion) bordering on fanaticism, all based on a book called "The Bible", no doubt written eons ago by primitive, ignorant and prejudiced men, who invented a God at their specifications. We have seen, over and over again, that authority over others tends to abuse it's power, hence, the need to remain vigilant and expose graft when present; or better, have preventive measures to begin with. All this is shameful, absurd even, a huge injustice in real lives. It is high time for women to rebel and say 'Enough already'!!
8
Years ago my mothrr spoke to our Catholic pastor about abuse, and he offered a referral to a good divorce attorney.
38
I am grieved whenever I hear or read criticisms of "the church," especially when "the church" is criticized for tolerating domestic abuse. Protestant Christian churches in the U.S. are a diverse group, as are their congregations. I can guarantee that in my own congregation, you will never hear anyone advise a wife - or a husband - to submit to cruelty. Domestic violence can happen here, because we are all sinners, but we don't accept it. We do our best, through pastoral care, and as much support as we can provide. What we can't do is to help with situations that no one tells us about. Experiencing domestic violence is nothing to be ashamed about, unless you don't tell anyone. In my church, you will find support.
8
Are we to believe that there is no domestic violence toward men?
Has there been any studies on the physical and mental torture suffered by men?
Of course men may be too ashamed to report it to the authorities.
If so it may be interesting for the NYT to assign an investigative reporter to do a story on his/her findings on this subject.
4
Are you saying women rape men? Yes, domestic violence toward men is real, but is often inflicted by male partners in same-sex relationships -- such partnerships being anathema in many evangelical churches.
3
Only a small ratio of men are abused compared to women abused. But of course if you rate a man's well-being and life ahead of a woman's, that one man equals 100s of women, that levels the scales, doesn't it?
9
You really need to expand on this comparison between these categories of abuse. Sounds a lot like what is called reverse discrimination by some whites who deny bitter fruit. Men actually get raped and battered by their female wives? The raping part fascinates me. Are there biblical teachings that offer support to the abusive wife? Undoubtedly there are pairings in which a violent and controlling woman hooks up with a passive, accepting person. Unlike male propogated violence in the USA, it's not endemic. No controlled, doubly blinded study needed.
4
“A 2014 survey of pastors found that most church leaders significantly underestimated the level of abuse in their congregations.”
Where is it easiest to find child molesters?
Where there are children.
Where is it easiest to find spousal abusers and rapists?
Where group doctrine insists spousal abuse does not exist. Where the abuse is covered up and women are taught to “submit” to their violent husbands.
The Abrahamic faiths were created by men in a violent, primitive era when women were legally and morally considered property. The teachings still enable men to indulge in the violent, primitive behavior of semi-literate goat herders and to treat their wives as property rather than equal partners in a mutually beneficial relationship.
Clueless church leaders prove the institution’s reputation is once again more important that the well-being of its members.
60
I doubt that Christian churches convert decent men into perpetrators of sexual abuse. But a failure by ministers to distinguish between the cultural biases of biblical authors, on the one hand, and the fundamental doctrines of the faith, on the other, can encourage predators to believe that their violent behavior enjoys divine sanction. These sick individuals scorn Christ's emphasis on the Golden Rule and instead cherry-pick verses from Paul's letters and the Old Testament that seem to endorse their distorted patriarchal vision of the family.
Pastors who reinforce this attitude by ignoring the gospel's focus on the equality of all human beings in the eyes of God violate their mission and disgrace the institution they represent. The ugly truth exposed by Ms. Baird and her associates, however, should surprise no one intimately familiar with the various branches of the Christian church.
Although these communities of faith perform valuable services in attacking poverty and helping vulnerable members of our society, they have rarely spearheaded efforts to correct deep-seated social problems. Christians enjoy a privileged position in most western countries, whose values they share. This "insider" status ill-equips them to identify and challenge the shortcomings that infect the mores of even the most progressive societies.
All denominations are hemorrhaging members, and this death spiral will continue unless Christians help rather than hinder positive social change.
23
Very good summary. Why have not these putative leaders recognized and acted upon the findings which you have presented? Fear, greed, comfort or a combination? They are not even worthy of contempt.
3
You don’t need to be a Christian to effect positive social change. These days, with constant church scandals, it’s better to be non-religious. You certainly get more respect.
5
The Catholic church has a history of social justice encyclicals, with increasingly apt recommendations reaching back to the late nineteenth century. Yet in all my years of attendance at Catholic schools and churches, I never heard reference to these teachings or exhortation to take them to heart from my teachers or from the pulpit.
So the background is there. Pope Francis has alluded to some of the teachings but this hasn't reached the parishes. Wonder why? Single issue focus on abortion might be a problem since it lines up so closely with social conservative thought. Therefore there is no stomach for addressing the real issues which might make abortion less necessary.
I can't help but think that the failure to address the social betterment of our societies from the pulpit is mired in mysogeny. And yes, this failure hinders positive social change. Its one of the reasons I no longer attend Catholic churches.
4
The point of this article isn't that religion promotes abuse or that it is more prevalent there (that is another discussion), the point of the article is that churches are supposed to be at the moral center of society, they are supposed to set an example for the rest of society in how to treat people and that all people are fundamentally valuable, but with things like domestic violence or forced rape in practice they often aren't, and that helps set the tone for the rest of society. Priests if a husband was actually busted for hitting his wife, would go to the station and talk the desk sargeant into letting him go, arguing the poor guy had too much to drink, you know how wives are, etc...And need I remind people that when they finally changed the law to allow prosecuting a husband for rape, many churches including the Catholic Bishops argued that a husband couldn't rape his wife, that it was her 'duty' to service him, and evangelical pastors still talk about repealing that. It isn't just the conservatives, liberal prelates will look at violence against women in people of color and give excuses for that abuse, arguing it is bc of society, racism, etc. They need to throw away the excuses and realize that women are not property, that there is no justification for abuse or rape, and call it out for what it is, a fundamental violation of God's will, and act accordingly. And even today, doing that will influence society and its attitudes, a moral stand is a moral stand.
16
"... how instinctively leaders jump to protect the reputation of the church, instead of the lives of the women within it."
This is frequently true in any large organization; why should churches be any different? The leaders are really defending their own positions and privileges. Watch for the assertion "We in the {organization} are *committed* to ensuring that all {people, employees, members...} are treated fairly and with respect..."
12
I am shocked that this is happening in the Anglican Church. I guess no religion is immune from violence as this article proves. I am glad they are finally reporting on this abuse to prove that it occurs in all religions and not just the Catholic Church. Of course, it is horrific no matter the denomination and must be reported whenever and where ever it occurs. Good reporting and thank you.
11
Julia, I have followed your work with enthusiasm. After Trump, many of us here in the USA wondered how we could reconcile our Christian faith with the hypocrisy exemplified by the purported 80% of Evangelicals supporting a man like Trump. (Another Evangelical leader in Chicago to recently resign: Bill Hybels). The Trump presidency has made worse the retrograde patriarchy which abusers have leaned on and which prevents women's concerns from being taken seriously. Now we have in Eric Schneiderman, NY Attorney, hope of feminists, a perpetrator of the insidious abuse of strangulation. Investigative journalism such as yours for which the NYTimes, Washington Post (and thankfully many other news outlets) are justly famous, has been a comfort especially when compared with the slow response of "the law". To those who say perpetrators are being tried in the media, we answer that the resignations from powerful positions by those who have had multiple victims or who have swept victim's claims under the rug, are most welcome.
21
While this article uses data from and focuses mostly on Christianity, these abuses are clearly a part of any religion based on the Judeo-Christian-Quran canon. As the dominant religions in the world, this dogma creates an environment that blames and shames women which provides a feeding frenzy for abusers.
14
Nooo, I don't really think so. I think we had male-centered civilization first, and that led to the male-centered bent of the religions. I don't think that a non-religious world would be easier on women.
5
It is l-o-n-g past time to eliminate the tax free status of any and every so-called religious group.
It is also as infuriating as it is unethical and just plain wrong to force half the population that's female to financially shoulder the tax burden FOR all these patriarchal commercial religious enterprises that would not exist were it not for the financial benefits.
49
That's a ridiculously broad statement considering many mainline Protestant churches are led by women. Financial benefits? Yes, giving away food to the poor, running a homeless shelter, etc. -- very lucrative stuff. Thanks for your insightful views.
3
I have no children, yet I do not object to paying taxes to support the public school system because education serves to elevate society. I do object to my tax dollars going to subsidize superstition-based groups that serve mostly to repress half of the population.
19
That is a silly response as taxes do not subsidize churches.
This reflects my experience in the Catholic church, particularly the more conservative immigrant communities within it. They shunned my pregnant mother for calling the police during one of my father's violent rages. Then the lay community leaders lectured her and us, her children, as they took in my father. They preached at us about Jesus' forgiveness and the role of the father as spiritual leader in the home. She took him back. He remained cruel. She was told that God would help him be less cruel, that she should remain devout and pray (because she was not being religious enough already?). Somehow it became her fault. And our fault as children. Because we lacked faith. They divorced and she found a new church community. Her experience with the church angers me to this day. They actively perpetuated years of violence within our family.
93
When I was about 12 years old I lived across the street from a girl my age. She and her mother often wore sunglasses to hide their black eyes. The police were regular visitors to their house. This was the sixties and men weren't arrested like they are now. The police mainly broke up fights. The husband of the mom and the father of the daughter, both beaten on a regular basis, was a Southern Baptist preacher. My mom used to invite my friend and her mom to stay with us but they were afraid to.
Twelve was the age I started to turn away from religion. I didn't like the way it treated girls and women and I didn't like the holier than thou attitude of evangelicals of which there are many in Texas where I grew up. I've never gone back. I'm not trying to change anyone's mind, but in my own mind I cannot belong to a patriarchal religion, any of them. If a religion, a job, or an organization cannot treat me and other women as equal to men, I don't want to belong.
63
It would be interesting to know if atheists and agnostics abuse their wives. How to actually conduct a study is the problem, but couldn't a study be done among the more progressive mainline churches. That would help.
If only more people understood you can stay home and worship God. If you want the social life or if you want to find new friends take a course in say world history, literature, or art.
4
Without question there are horrific abusers among people of all faiths, including those without. However, I submit that the author's point is that these animals do not have an allegedly divine-sanctioned organization, with a vested interest in maintaining their patriarchal paradigm, defending their abhorrent behavior.
5
Of course atheists can abuse, too.
However, they just don't use their religion (or lack, thereof) as an excuse. They don't verbally train each other nor do they get bailed out at the cop station by the local clergy. No one comes around and tells the abused that it is their "duty" to get the snot knocked out of them.
(Please note that I did not use "he" or "she".)
Now, here's what I suspect is the difference.
It matters whether your system is hierarchical or equalitarian. The USSR was formal hierarchical communism. It was ladderism and everyone had their place on that ladder, especially women who were "equal" ONLY after the 142nd Amendment. Duh. Because it was ladderistic, the women were beaten, often enough that laws had to be passed to define "domestic violence" as a crime. Those laws were thrown out last year by the Russian Duma at the demand of the Russian Orthodox Church. Oligarchs love religious back-up, and religious back-up will always defend a man's right to smack a woman around. If not for the money, Russia could just as easily gone Bokum Haram or outright ISIS.... which is what they are likely to do when the $$$ runs out.
Now compare that to Sweden, right next door. Sweden is socialist, a social democracy. Social democracies are equalitist, equal. Children are not smacked around. Wives are not beaten. The churches don't preach "submit", and it is "equal law", not "God's Law" that matters.
The PEW Report has been studying this for years. It's a terrific source.
13
Its too bad the Bible doesn't address today's challenges. Instead it was written in a time when women were property and slavery was common. To avoid disease and illness, it outlined foods and activities you should avoid, most of which are harmless today. The average age of marriage was as soon as girl had her period. Many children were necessary because many died both during childbirth but before becoming an adult. The average age at death was under 40. There was no education, most people couldn't read. There was no science - thunderstorms were misunderstood, the earth was the center of the universe and flat.
How does the Bible help with getting chores done, or saving for a house, or making rent payments, or finding a job, or finishing your degree? How does it help to even deal with people of different backgrounds? For you can find plenty of scripture that contradicts itself on these matters.
And yet the Bible is full of lessons that can be applied on a daily basis in today's world.
So what can we do? We can interpret it the way we want to. In our interpretation, we discover ourselves and our values.
Its ultimately not the Bible's fault, its the way a person interprets it and lives it. Yes, a church can misinterpret and lead you on a faulty path. But you are the one responsible for following that path. You are the one choosing which church to follow.
15
We can look around for a religion that addresses the needs of today's people, is what we can do.
This will be the end of the Church if it doesn’t take notice. Be forewarned.
39
the churches have too often told women to bear
the brutality of their husbands based on the
writings of Paul in his epistles.Jesus,it seems to
me,would be horrified at their indifference to
domestic violence. as an ex seminarian in a Roman Catholic order,I can vividly recall being
told to keep away from women during summer
break because I might succumb to temptation.
women in organized religion are portrayed far
too often as either suffering victims or
cunning sedhctresses. the churches must stop
preaching tolerance of abuse and cliched ideas
of women and start preaching at the men who
beat them up to cease their brutal ways.
66
I can only draw from my own experience born and raised Catholic, but the similarities between my Church's teachings and Ms Baird's research in Australia are striking and remarkable. Our Church remains strongly patriarchal and oppressive of women's rights. Among the first words spoken during a marriage ceremony are those of St. Paul's...to paraphrase, wives are subject to their husbands. Birth control? No. Abortion? Absolutely not. For us to be the Virgin Mary personified is the expectation of Church theology, unrealistic and unjust.
However, from what I have perceived, here in America this exploitation may be influenced and exacerbated by the hypocrisy of organized religion, but the root of domestic violence is the makeup of society in general. Daily we read about assaults on women by the every day citizen to the rich and powerful. One would think that after two thousand years our society would have evolved to complete and total equality of the sexes. But shamefully that is not the case.
54
The old adage of power corrupts,absolute power corrupts absolutely is applicable anywhere. Why is this any different in domestic situations?
That is the crux.
.
30
Absolutely true. The reason men aren't abused more is simply that they are stronger. When a woman marries, she usually commits herself for life to a bigger, stronger person who has the strength, to kill her with his bare hands. There is an inherent lack of evenness that can lead to abuse.
7
Lord Acton's adage was in fact based on religion. He was a devout lifelong Roman Catholic who denounced the Church's proclamation that a Pope, ex cathedra, was infallible.
He knew better.
5
How do people gain and keep control over other people? They insist that they are special and superior, and whomever they choose is inferior, and wants or needs to be dominated and controlled. If those people rebel it's proof of their need to be subsumed. This is on clear display in most major religions, and guess what, women and children always lose. I'm so glad my parents didn't decide it was necessary to brainwash us with any religion. Unfortunately, abusers don't need that construct to control people; simple social pressures, such as that against divorce, stood in just fine for any misogynist religion they might have chosen.
41
The point that no one is immune is the central one as Ms Baird indicates. The Headline to this piece suggests that Churches intentionally hide the fact of abuse. Her message would be better supported with a headline that reflects her point.
10
Domestic violence has been tolerated because violent behavior from men has been tolerated, even considered the norm.
We need community leaders to help teach men and women to change the culture of male domination. But our community leaders are a big part of the problem and can provide no guidance. The only solution may be a growing awareness that this isn't working and increasing pressure to change the culture from the bottom up.
38
"But the point is not whether church communities are more or less prone to domestic violence. It’s that they are not immune from it."
This sentence is somewhat mind boggling. If there is no connection via data what exactly is the point- that religion is failing to protect women from abusive husbands?
I think we should be focusing on problems with our culture in general and not begin trying to determine if specific religions are more conducive to encouraging domestic violence, but since you've done your study, perhaps the story should be that you have no story. There appears to be no connection between church affiliation and domestic violence in Australia.
Sorry if that's a boring story, but that seems all there is here.
2
The point is that there are many Christian churches in Australia and elsewhere that preach that wives should obey their husbands. Too many men then take that to mean that anything goes in the treatment of their wives, including severe physical and psychological abuse. These churches often further support this paradigm when devout Christian women who are being abused come to their pastor for counseling on how to handle the situation, rather than consulting a secular counselor trained to help them escape their domestic situation. They are told to stay with the abuser and try to better please him.
45
I think the point is not at all that data is insignificant; it's rather that quibbling over precise ratios -- is this denomination or that churchgoing habit 7% more likely to foster abuse -- is mostly an attempt to distract from the indisputable conclusion that there is a very serious problem.
4
"Too many men then take that to mean that anything goes in the treatment of their wives"
And my point is that there is no data based evidence to support that assertion as the writer herself concludes.
As abhorrent as male hierarchical sexual violence is, men prone to this crime don't seem to need church endorsement to commit it.
I hate the male dominant model and it probably perpetuates violence against women, more so as women fight against it, but we should keep our facts straight and not blame the religious aspect without any real evidence of its existence.
Must we agree that people and churches are Christian just because they say they are? What if we say openly that some church or other is not what it claims to be. What if, for instance, we call the church in question 'fake christian' or 'ersatz christian' or 'claims to be christian'? Would that be so bad? It would certainly, often, be more accurate.
34
More to the point, must we assume that people and churches are good by virtue of their being Christian? How about fake good, ersatz good, claims to be good? It would certainly, far too often, be more accurate.
4
If you read the bible you soon realize that there is no position that isn't promoted and condemned depending on which particular passage you want to use as your authority.
5
Churches are communities of ordinary human beings. That means that there are many good people who commit ordinary sins (e.g., lie), but there are also good people who sometimes do terrible things, as well as people who act regularly in evil ways.
No one wants to believe that the person in the next pew is a wife beater or a child molester, but then, too, they don't want to believe that of their neighbor or the parent of their kid's friend (or of their own friend). Yet, we can never tell who is and is not committing such acts behind closed doors.
More conservative churches add to the problem when they teach that male dominance is God-ordained. While such teaching will not make a man an abuser, it can and does add a sense of entitlement to any inclined in that way.
100
Amen.
6
None of this surprises me. As I have learned with my daughter, the deep-seeded dehumanization of girls begins at a young age, even in the most wealthy, best education, most liberal areas of America.
This article is deeply disturbing, and shows the long road ahead women of many faiths must endure, but perhaps most upsetting is that I had to learn from two Australians how prevalent this problem is in the United States.
103
Faith is always singular and it is not the same as "a religion".
3
You're right. Domestic violence is not confined to the Evangelicals. It knows no bounds.
6
Good luck changing the minds of those who believe they have divine sanction to perform despicable acts. At some point even those who wish to deny reality will be struck by the burden of maintaining a Medieval institution while trying to conform to the ideals of equality and comity.
Even the National Football League is making a better effort.
77
Transparency is crucial to addressing systemic abuse of power within our institutions. Women of all walks of life should stand up for each other and for our children. Only then will any change be made. Have courage to call out abusive behavior. Those in power, which the majority are men, seem to want to protect the reputation of the institution, the source of their power rather than protect the victims of abuse.
85
Protect the source of their power. Nailed it!
6
Fascinating study. Please keep up the great reporting and research.
92