Mr. Martines,
The advice you gave reminded me of some excellent advice I read years ago, which I remember from time to time. It was given by Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and I'm going to quote her here:
"An... often-asked question when I speak in public: 'Do you have some good advice you might share with us?' Yes, I do. It comes from my savvy mother-in-law, advice she gave me on my wedding day. 'In every good marriage,' she counseled, 'it helps sometimes to be a little deaf.' I have followed that advice assiduously, and not only at home through 56 years of a marital partnership nonpareil. I have employed it as well in every workplace, including the Supreme Court. When a thoughtless or unkind word is spoken, best tune out. Reacting in anger or annoyance will not advance one’s ability to persuade."
-Ruth Bader Ginsburg, published in the NYT Opinion section on 10/2/16.
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Thank you for your detailed response Emily.
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That's why Justice Ginsburg is the Notorious RBG...
Brava
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New York City, the biggest small town in the world.
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The woman was lucky that Charles Manson was not walking beside her.
I believe he would have given her different advice.
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Despite what you may hear, New York City is a friendly place. Shared trauma creates strong camaraderie.
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Thanks for a really nice and quintessentially New York City Diary entry Joe. My guess would be, based on many encounters over the years in New York of a similar nature, that you probably didn’t become friends, or even take the time to introduce yourselves. (But, I think from now on, when I have such an encounter with a man I meet in the city, I’ll probably ask, “Are you by any chance Freddie?)
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Allen J Share, LOL, if the person is walking in old running shoes five miles up Broadway in June, or I guess any season, rather than cabbing or taking the bus, it ain’t me. :) Otherwise, outside of spring and fall tax times, it could be me anywhere, though I sheepishly admit I've only been to Staten Island twice in my life, for funerals - so if it's Staten Island, odds are it's not me.
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Your welcome Allen. Unfortunately we did not introduce ourselves
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Thank you, Joe. Wonderful story. The Metropolitan Diary always brings back memories.
So...here’s mine:
Some years ago, maybe July 1987, my wife and I were on the long line to buy ice cream at the Bronx Zoo. There was a young couple behind us. They heard us chatting (I’m sure), and we heard them. When we got to the counter, my wife said, “We’ll split an ice cream. Two spoons, please.” The guy behind us said, “C’mon! You can’t split an ice cream!” I said, “I agree, 100%!”
The long and the short of it: Each couple ended up with TWO ice creams, one for each of us. We chatted, hugged, and said, “See you.” Of course, we never saw them again, but we often think about them. We hope they think about us.
My wife says, “That’s New York for you!”
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That IS New York for you! Another great comment Dean, which could have been a Diary entry on its own.
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Thanks, Allen. Several of the recent Diary entries have give me some pleasant strolls down Memory Lane.
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A wonderfully vivid story. And so great that you all walked together and no one felt uncomfortable.
I do have to admit I kept scrolling just a bit, hoping for the follow-up to "she agreed with my advice" to be something like "And we'll be married 20 years this summer." (Something about the story made me wish you all well, somehow.) It would have been perfect, since it was June 1998. (Did you become friends, though? If you didn't, don't tell me; let me think you did anyway.)
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