I have often thought of purchasing a condo/coop in NYC . . . stories like this remind me of why I don't.
15
Wow. The level of emotion generated by this article and these comments is astonishing.
I come to this issue with interesting background: Up till age 40, I was terrified of all dogs, large and small. Then, as a result of various events, my fear dissipated, and I was able to enjoy a dog's companionship for the first time. But I can never forget my years of anxiety. Consequently, although I have/had larg dogs, I learned how to raise them, and how to train them properly. Every time I enter an elevator, my Bloodhound immediately "corners,' sitting in one of the back corners, quietly. I would never permit a dog to approach or touch another person without his/her permission. I do not forget the terror this would have held for me years ago.
Some of the attitudes of both "sides" in these comments are revolting. I regard allowing one's dog off-leash in the city as not only a violation of the law, but a sign of utter disrespect for the animal, whose life is jeopardized by exposing him to the dangers of NYC traffic, etc. But say one word to any of these owners, and you will get a mouthful in return.
Owners must understand that others have a right not to like dogs, and these attitudes do not permit an owner to disregard any laws. Others need to have a little understanding that dogs are virtually like children to their families. It seems to me that this is such an incendiary topic, that before any word is said, tempers already begin to rise.
We all have to live together, after all.
23
I am having a similar situation with my neighbor. She hates my dog inexplicably and has become verbally abusive and scary. My dog has developed a complex after her incessant threatening behavior and barks and growls aggressively now every time she passes the door. I have surveyed all my neighbors and they have assured me that my dog is not a nuisance at all. This lady is clearly unhinged but it’s ruining my life! Reading the comments, it seems to me my only course of action is to move. But then she wins!!
12
If anyone threatened to kill my pet, it would not end up well for them. Incarceration be damned. I'm born and raised Brooklyn.
17
Easier said then done but if you want a solution to a neighbor problem with your dog move to a building primarily with young tenants. My small 10 lb pup loves people and on the elevator she greets everyone she sees by putting her little paws up onto their legs and demands to be petted. (of course there are a few people who don't want to be bothered and I can spot them) but mostly she is welcomed with "she is so cute and it is ok".
7
No Peggysmom, it's not OK. Your terminally cute dog starts to crawl my leg and I'd give you one warning. After that it goes to (in my case) the coop board. It's an easy call for the board.
So many excuses for not having dogs in the city professionally trained. And that is one of the first habits the trainer would break. Cute or not.
31
Would like to know the neighbor's side of the story.
17
I wouldn't.
10
First law of psychology: You cannot change the behavior of others, you can only change your own behavior.
First, try to find out, possibly through a third party, why your neighbor hates your dog. See if it is possible to fix the problem. Try to avoid the person. If you see the person, walk your pup in a different direction. Recognize that some people just hate dogs (or cats).
Second, record the cursing and threats on your cell phone. While the police will not take immediate action on a threat against property (your dog), it will be evidence should your neighbor actually take action. Harming another person's property is a crime.
12
This is terrible advice. Would you approach the person amicably if she was threatening a child? The neighbor has behaved abominably regardless of her complaint. Do get honest about any objectionable dog behavior and fix it if necessary, but also make it clear to your neighbor that threats will not be tolerated. Recordings and notes can be helpful for evidence in future. Hopefully it won’t come to that.
16
We have a neighbor who "loves dogs' or so he says but cannot tolerate 1 minute of our dogs barking. He has so far yelled at our dogs, posted the city rules on barking on social media, yelled at me etc... we have gotten to the point where we time how long they are out and never let them out alone. All of this to work around his social media (never to us) complaints that they bark while he is working from home, bark when he goes to bed at 9pm, bark when he is watching TV. We are aware that they bark, we do everything to keep it at a minimum, which means dropping everything to make sure they never bark more than a few times. He has made me a nervous wreck. I have surveyed all our other neighbors and none of them have an issue with our doges. We are literally working OUR schedule around his. So why is this ok? Why is it that some people think they more important than others - this neighbor built a deck over the summer ALL summer while I work from home, mows his lawn for over an hour on Saturdays when we are sitting on our porch etc... guess some folk are just more important. Our solution we are moving .. he wins ... since life is too short to not like where you live and as some others have noted we are terrified he will do something to hurt our dogs. There is no way to cure a crazy neighbor! Just move.
8
I am a dog owner and I love my dogs. I rescue them from shelters. One of my dogs was adopted when she was a puppy. At the time she didn't bark because she was very timid. She's 10 now. She's a mix of 2 breeds. Both are known to be barkers. She barks. I control this by bringing her inside after 2 minutes of barking. Because I had a disabled neighbor who was always at home with time on his hands I had a lawsuit filed against me. He had surveillance equipment aimed at my yard. And he made tapes and detailed spread sheets. After a year and $6000 in lawyers fee his complaint was thrown out. His evidence consisted of 2 hours of audio tape with less than 2 minutes of barking. Though you could hear him humming happily in the background.
3
I am a dog owner - love dogs - and I have a suggestion. Perhaps the dog owner could install a noise-activated recorder to find out if her dog barks a lot when he/she is not in the apartment. I might also install something that shows who knocks on her door (just in case the neighbor really is nuts and deliberately bangs on her door to make the dog bark). I also agree with others who have said that he/she needs to find out why the neighbor hates the dog. Is it the only dog in the building? Is this this the only dog owner she threatens. (I would also use my phone to record the cursing and threats). I am also not sure why the the person who answered the question immediately assumed that this was the dog/dog-owner's fault - had a problem with dogs in the past perhaps?
7
The complaining neighbor sounds psychologically unhinged.
I would document the threats, keep the co-op board advised, and keep a close eye on my dog.
Sure, the dog owner can gently approach the neighbor, without dog, to inquire how the situation can be bettered, explain that the dog is friendly and so forth, and that might help. But anyone threatening to kill a pet sounds mentally unsound and vigilance is warranted.
26
People in my building had what they thought were wonderful well-behaved dogs, which barked constantly when they weren't home. Eventually, my NYC apartment building's board—and this is a column about problems in NYC, nowhere else—banned dogs. Problem solved.
16
I can think of a host of worse problems than muffled dogs barking (easily drowned out by some music): horrible smells, hoarders who bring pests, unsanitary tenants bringing bed bugs in. Banning dogs seems heartless; pets are a wonderful addition to any person's life and bring happiness and emotional comfort.
6
Problem solved until you go to sell your apartment and realize that you've hurt the value of apartments in your building. Many people (including me) won't buy in a building that doesn't allow dogs.
13
The dog haters are out in force. Of course the dog the problem and not the wack job that is throwing threats around. If anyone so much as threatened my dog they would quickly regret it.
25
Actually It's inconsiderate owners who are the problem, not "dog haters".
5
Paulie, so right. I think that person cursing and threatening is mentally disturbed. I would volunteer to take them to Bellevue for a psych evaluation.
4
I have two docile well behaved shih tzus. They don’t even bark. A neighbor has a pit bull she can’t train. It wants to Kill my dogs. It has already attacked and seriously insured five dogs on the street that I know of. The woman walks her vicious dog while on the phone and with earphones. At first I begged her to be mindful. To no avail. Then I yelled at her and said if her dog harmed me or my dogs I would kill it. This is not a threat, it is a promise. I live in terror every time I walk out the door with my dogs. Why has this become my problem? Yes I will kill her dog with a hammer if if threatens or harms me and it is hell having to live like this. The co opt told her to muzzle the dog. I don’t trust her or her deranged monster.
12
If the cursing neighbor has a genuine grievance about the dog (it barks, acts aggressively, poops in the halls, etc.) then why hasn't the neighbor complained to the co-op board? That would be the rational thing to do, rather than cursing and threatening to kill the dog. Seems to me, this indicates that it is the neighbor who is unhinged in this situation.
30
Not enough information. Does your neighbor focus on you or do other dog owners have a problem? What behavior sets her off? It sounds like your board needs a letter from an attorney to make them compliant with rules.
9
I agree; not enough information given in the first place. Also, I seem to be the only commenter that does not believe this letter is completely truthful.
5
Some people are just mean spirited.
11
Some dog owners are inconsiderate.
9
And the answer is threaten to kill the dog? hmmm
5
Being a coop member myself, I suspect a little more explanation is called for when it comes to the dog owner's explanation. As is frequently the case, we are led to believe that the dog owner is the victim; the coop member objecting to the dog surely hates dogs, right?
Unless the complaining coop member is determined to be mentally unsound, the dog -- and first and foremost the owner -- has given reason for complaint. The animal likely doesn't know how to act around other people (e.g., crawling up one's leg in the elevator); the animal is in areas off limits for dogs in the coop, and then defecates or urinates there; the dog barks at the front door at everything and anything that moves in the hallway, etc.
If I am hearing your dog barking deep in my living room, it *is* your problem, and my coop rules stipulate that fact. It's a minority -- a significant minority (more than 5%) -- of dog owners that assume the most absurd prerogatives for their animal. I don't dislike dogs but I have a powerful distaste for owners that refuse to have them professionally trained. Coop boards should require a sign off from a professional trainer before admitting a new dog.
Eight and half million of us live on top of each other in NYC, and there are hundreds of dogs living with us. Get them trained. By a professional.
27
gking01, I agree that dogs living in apt buildings should be trained by professionals. We have a beautiful German Shephard living across the hall from us who barks whenever his owners leave. It's getting on our nerves. We are dog lovers and still miss our beloved dog, but she was well behaved and not a barker. We won't report our neighbors, but jeez. They also don't clean up the muddy footprints the dog leaves in the hallway and being a large dog, that's a lot of mud.
4
After twenty years of renting -- from West Berlin to Prague to NYC -- and the last 17 years as a coop member, I can lay down the cardinal flaw in the significant minority (i.e., not a mere 5%) of dog owners loathed by their neighbors: They don't know who their animal is when no one is home. Barking. At everything and at nothing, at all hours for any duration.
That could be solved if the animals were professionally trained. But they aren't and, after all, the owners all swear by their own abilities to train their Fido. Even when they aren't home. Duh.
13
I feel sorry for the poor dumb dog. Clearly, these neighbors despise each other and the poor dog has become an unwitting pawn in the middle of their dispute. Take the dog out of the equation, and they will find another matter about which to bicker.
7
No, I am *specifically* complaining about the dog. I don't care if my neighbor is is a neo-Nazi, anti-catholic or hates queers. That I can ignore (and vote accordingly in my next election). What I can't ignore is the door barking mindlessly at 6AM or after midnight and going on for thirty minutes uninterrupted.
No, MD -- it's the dog. First, middle and last. The *dog barking*.
I.e., those of us complaining about dogs barking are not simply looking for trouble; we are complaining about dogs barking. Duh.
11
Maybe Rand Paul's neighbor didn't like his dog.
4
@Dan Green - ...or maybe alleged victim had threatened neighbor-dog's life (hypothetically speaking, of course).
1
If this neighbor is truly threatening, I do not condone that. But, based on my experience, I am skeptical that the dog is as innocuous as the writer indicates. I like dogs and grew up with dogs. But those dogs were living on a large acreage, and neighbors did not have to hear them or encounter their excrement, etc. In the past three decades in this country there seems to have been a sharp increase in the number of people owning dogs where the dog is not going to be happy and, understandably, neither will the neighbors. Many dog owners operate under the misconception that behavior they choose to tolerate in their pet somehow aligns with what what everybody else should be willing to tolerate. I had many occasions when I would be in the park or on a walk with my small children and unrestrained dogs would run toward them at high speed and jump and nuzzle at them. I want my kids to like pets and not be frightened by them, but there are pretty intimidating (or plainly annoying) behaviors that dog owners allow, or are oblivious to. The typical response when my kids would seem anxious about three dogs unbridled attention was "don't worry, he likes people". The unspoken sentiment being "this is the way I am going to allow my dog to behave, and YOU need to make accommodations".
24
The pet owner is responsible for the behavior of the dog and it's actions towards other people. However a pet owner is also responsible for the animal's safety and well being. If another person is threatening your dog, it is your moral obligation to defend and protect the animal from threats of death. If the police are unwilling to act, then you may have to take matters into your own hands by whatever means necessary
6
Too bad you weren't in San Francisco when the dog ate the woman on the same apartment floor to the point she was hardly identifiable. The owners of those dogs claimed that "Hey! They're just being dogs!" The two owners quickly divorced -- she was slow but apparently not entirely stupid -- and they both spent time behind bars. For a year or so, the most hated people in San Francisco.
Dog owners can be irresponsible to the point of criminality. Only after the crime is committed can one press charges. Too little, too late.
14
Another SF women was killed by her neighbor's adorable pit bulls.
10
Jeez, you've got a dog, I'm sure you've got some D'Agostino's bags, and I suspect that the threatener has a doormat, or at least a threshold.
It's not hard to figure out what to do...
3
Dog owners feel that rather than have their pet do it's thing on their own property , it's easier to walk the animal to someone else's house and do it there. They figured it out right?
3
She'd probably get a court order for the dog's DNA so she could make a case against the owner. Better to clean up after someone else's dog and leave it. That'll puzzle her.
3
Eric, LOL!
Q says nothing about why Neighbor (N) might dislike Q's dog or whether the dog does anything that might put someone off. Q might speak to other residents about their impressions of the dog or their impressions of N. If the dog really is inoffensive, and N's behavior is threatening for no reason, a letter from a lawyer mentioning harassment might be a good idea. And Q should take Lawrence's advice.
4
As the owner and keeper of two identical yellow Labs, one now dead, the other very elderly, the biggest source of anxiety for me on the beach and in the street has always been other dogs and their idiot owners.
I trained my two castrated males to walk obediently side by side on a very short leash on my left heel. Because they were gentle souls, just about every untrained out-of-control mutt on the block, off its leash of course, would have a go at them.
Australians in the Tropical Far North generally haven't a clue about the different breeds and how to train a dog properly. Our dogs hold up a mirror to its master or mistress. If the pooch is feckless, undisciplined and irresponsible, then it's because his or her owner is.
13
We need more information on the dog and its owner because the demeanor and behavior of both may be involved here.
I lived in a New York apartment, had a small dog that didn't bark or pee in the hallways or behave in a threatening manner, and I always picked up after my dog. As a result I never had any dog-related problems while I lived in the city aside from the highly inflated cost of veterinary care.
Unless the complainer has a medical or mental condition, it seems likely that the (allegedly) offending dog may be a frequent/constant barker, does its business where it shouldn't, menaces people, or otherwise disturbs the domestic tranquility.
I also lived in a condo where an elderly woman regularly let her dog out into the hallway each morning to do its business on the hallway rug because she couldn't be bothered taking it downstairs. She was clearly incapable of functioning properly in regard to caring for her pet and following condo rules, but the condo board was strangely reluctant to intervene other than to assess the woman for carpet replacement. The problem was finally solved when the woman's children intervened and moved her--minus the dog--to an elder care facility.
11
Nothing works like hiring an attorney. A small mob was growing in my neighborhood over my dog, a black Lab. My neighbors have dogs too but the complaints came at me for a couple of reasons. I was the only one to use a leash and clean up after my dog. Yes, this is true. As a result he became more anxious as free running dogs barked at him on our daily walks. I got a notice from the HOA president that I needed to keep my dog from barking. Next the HOA filed a complaint with animal control. Honestly my dog was no threat and he rarely barks unless he needs to. So I hired an attorney who advised the HOA that it was a felony to file a false animal complaint. He also advised them that they had 15 days to resolve the off leash problem and to clean up after their dogs (instead of using a shovel to lob dog poop into the river). The HOA board scrambled, hired two attorneys, updated their pet policy, installed doggie bags at the gate, and everyone’s dog is leashed. Yes I have a couple of neighbors who despise me, but I made points with those too terrified of the Board to speak up. Further, the past president and current president of the Board offered to help me with anything I might need in the future. I guess they got it that I am a person to be reckoned with. The bottom line is that when you are bullied, you have to take action. Don’t bother with a neighborly chat when dealing with an irrational bully. The bully will see your offer as weakness. Instead threaten to sue for harassment.
22
There is too much about your story for me to buy it hook-line-and-sinker.
You always clean up after your dog, which is always on a leash. And you are the "only one" who does that in your Portland neighborhood. (I admit, my first red flag in your story, having lived in Portland.) Your dog, as you tell it: "Honestly my dog was no threat and he rarely barks unless he needs to..." Sounds like "Hey! Dogs bark. That's what dog's do!" As near as I can tell, over the decades, that's like complaining about the rain falling (except, of course, it isn't).
It's true: I wasn't there so I can't know. But I admit up front: Your story sounds suspiciously like another dog-owner-as-poor-victim, and I've experienced too many of them to buy into most of those stories. Most of them, in my experience, constitute bad pet owners making excuses. If I'm wrong -- and your explanation doesn't convince me -- then I apologize. Otherwise? Find out why so many people, including other pet owners, detest you. I would imagine you are not the victim you make yourself out to be.
7
Were you in my coop, and I heard your dog more than (briefly) once a week deep in my living room, I would escalate the issue to the board. And the coop rules are entirely on my side; you would lose, with or without an attorney. You throw the term "bully" around left, right and center. Who precisely is the "bully" here?
Love your dog to death: keep him/her to yourself.
5
barking dogs drive me barking mad
in one case, the owner/neighbour would go the gym for a couple of hours - while she was away her dog locked in her unit would bark continuously for that two hours - as soon as she came home it stopped so she didn't hear it
so when I complained about her dog barking she took great offence - 'my dog never barks' - oh - um - no.
Like screaming babies, loving owners tend to overlook and not even notice noises which might be offensive to neighbours. In our complex, strata bylaw number one basically says 'must not make any noise at anytime likely to disturb' a neighbour, or risk $550 fine or eviction.
So yeah - there's that ...
15
Record your encounters with either your phone mic recorder on or with a camera. Get a lawyer. Sue him for emotional distress and board for not doing anything. Get him kicked out as the settlement with the board. But still sue him and get some money. For him, negative reinforcement will be a positive thing. Do this for all dog lovers everywhere.
8
Please do not expect that everyone loves your dog. I, personally, don't much care for dogs. I am a small person and have been literally knocked down by dogs whose owners did not control them. I never approach a dog but too many people allow their dogs to approach - and often jump on - me. Is the writer here properly controlling his/her dog? If not, the problem is not with the neighbor OR the dog, but with the dog's owner.
12
In San Francisco two pit bulls actually mauled and killed a young women in her apt common area. Nice!
5
My neighbor had a dog who barked all day once she left the apt. It drove me crazy, my heart rate sped up. She was not aware of it and once I told her, being a good neighbor, she put a muzzle on the dog when she went out. The problem was solved and now I'm loyal neighbor, and we have helped each other in other building matters.
But I got lucky.
13
The neighbor should not be cursing or threatening her dog, but many "dog people" do not understand that not everyone like dogs, and they let their dogs run wild, bark, etc which can be very annoying.
I lived in a building once where a neighbor let her dog bark very loudly non-stop all day one Christmas - I wanted to kill her dog after that!
10
As I walk my dog around the condo mornings and evenings, I ponder various ironies:
(1) There is far more goose, deer, and rabbit poo on the ground than dog poo. Yet nobody seems concerned about those?
(2) How rarely I see anybody just walking the grounds without a dog, so how would they know whether there is dog poo out there or not? How likely would they be to be affected by a dog off leash accompanied by its owner?
(3) Why is it that nobody seems to mind pet cats roaming the grounds on their own, killing birds and yowling at each other in the middle of the night?
(4) How dogs and the happiness they often bring their owners have become such a target for irascible people?
8
you obviously don't live in a city with sidewalks where stepping in poop is a common hazard when dog owners think they are exempt from having to scoop their pet's poop
I wish I could shame these owners into doing the right thing - the best would be witnessing them have the awful experience of stepping in "it" themselves . . . sometimes the shoe has to be on the other foot (seriously) to make the point
Consideration is just that. Stop being lazy. Wild animals are just that - wild. Pets are domestic companions. The comparison you make is ridiculous.
10
Nothing more disgusting than stepping in dog doo. Wake up .
8
They are inconsiderate , self-absorbed, lazy people who seem to think everyone around thinks their pet is cute and adorable so they can leave the mess for others to deal with. Not to mention the threatening aggressive barking. Sooooooo cute ("Don't worry . he's a friendly dog" Right.)
4
Never. Threaten. My. Dog. I will hurt you.
Grow a spine, pet owner, and stand up to the bullying neighbor; a few choice words accompanied by a sustained glare should put an end to her sport. Your dog depends on you for protection so take every precaution to ensure his safety. File a police report and give a copy to your neighbor in the unlikely event of a future encounter. Make sure your front door is sealed airtight to prevent tainted food from being slipped beneath the door.
You have your dog's love and devotion, now earn his trust and respect.
12
I have heard a hundred variations on this irrational defense of a clueless dog owner. It falls into the impossibly large silo that says "Hey! Dogs bark, that's what dogs do."
And you can be sure our owner assumes the most absurd prerogatives for his dog. Not the dog's fault (it never is); the owner has trained the dog to be what it is.
6
While out running I often come upon untrained dogs and clueless owners. Dogs off leash, bounding, barking, racing at me. After a couple falls and two bites I came up with solution: never appeal to the dog owner. Stop. Act as if the dog is your own. In a short sharp authoritative manner tell dog to stop. You have to act like you are in charge. This has worked 100% of time. Boy do the owners hate it. It is always ‘you cannot yell at him’ or ‘this is a rescue dog!’ Fools. For the most part I ignore them as if only the dog and I are there. I think it must drive them crazy that I can control their animal and they cannot.
8
Don’t have a pittbull or other large vicious dog that wants to eat my docile sweet dogs and all will be fine. Your dog harms my well behaved munchkins i will kill your dog. Not a threat, a promise.
A lot of the people commenting here seem to be stuck on the fact that nothing was said about the behavior of the dog. Fine. However, instead of issuing threats the neighbor could have used the power of speech to explain to the dog owner what is it that the dog is doing that so insults her.
13
I once had a neighbor who had a barking dog. The dog only barked obnoxiously when the neighbor went out and never experienced first hand te noise. As a consequence didn't believe the dog was a nuisance. So what I did was write down the time of each barking incident (which were frequent) and when the neighbor returned, I called him and said "Fido barked at 1.02 for a full minute, at 1.09, at 1.14, at ..." for a sequence of about 20 times over a couple hours. The neighbor then realized the extent and took care of the problem. Happily ever after we are.
9
Might the dog owner " borrow" a friends dog for a day, preferably a different breed and size to see how the neighbor reacts?
I thought my Golden Retriever was the most wonderful dog ever, BTW she was, but I was always tentative during walks especially in the city, trying to "read" other people for any anxiety on their parts and reacting accordingly.
1
I'd say the first clue comes in the first two words. "another resident."
1
Ontario has the most generous laws protecting tenant in North America, but one remaining non-criminal cause for eviction is a barking dog. I had a tenant who assured me her dog never barked - and it never did when she was around. But every day when she left for work it started, and I was at home, and it was unbearable. She had to move.
9
The single worst flaw in dog owners is not knowing who their animals are when no one is at home.
I don't blame the dog. But I do blame the owner (why should they care? It doesn't happen when they're around, right?)
Boot 'em. And tell them why. They'll just make mindless excuses to the next proprietor.
5
People will poison your pets.
We had it happen.
Do not let the dog pick up strange unknown substances on walks.
37
And pick up after your dog dumps on my property. Thanks for being considerate.
8
At the vary least take out your phone and record her cursing and threats to kill the dog. Remind the person that acting to kill the dog has real legal consequences.
We know nothing about the dog or persons involved so the only fact in the future is for the dog owner to have a video. If fido has no behavior problems, then the unbalanced behavior if a concern. I have had more problems with neighbors that dogs so I tend to see the human not working with the dog owner as more of a problem.
23
Dog owner might want to ask a friend how fully dog owner is complying with the pet etiquette suggestions circulated by the board.
15
IMO, the dog owner should be consulting a competent attorney about this situation.
24
Be very careful. That competent attorney may well determine that the dog is out of line by community standards.
3
It sounds like you're dealing with a deranged individual. Who knows what she's capable of. The police and board are being derelict in addressing this. I agree with those who say record her and get a lawyer, and make sure your dog is protected.
34
Was cut off at the end of my comment. It should read, that I question the love of a dog owner, when she or he feels that their pet belongs in four, three, or less rooms in an Apartment House!
9
I'm sure dogs would rather be in an apartment than in a shelter.
3
Wow, people have gotten softer in NYC since I left in the early 90's. Get a lawyer? Go running to the co-op board? Not when I lived there. You go get in her face and threaten her back with escalation. Explain it with intimidating body language. Explain it to her graphically what will happen if she doesn't shut up and mind her own business. That's how we did it back in the day
19
As noted in the article, threatening an animal is not likely to be a police matter, while threatening a person is.
14
If the neighbor harms the dog, there are laws under which he/she could be prosecuted. So why isn't it a police matter?
But I agree with the folks who say that the dog owner should figure out what's going on. Maybe the dog seems aggressive towards the neighbor. Dogs sense how people are feeling towards them. He/She could unknowingly be encouraging the dog to act out around her. (This is still the dog owner's problem).
8
99.9% of the time, fault belongs with the owner not the dog. Last year, I confronted a neighbor about letting his dog dump on my property and not cleaning up.....he did not even carry a plastic bag! He told me to go home and take a nap.......
19
I had the same problem. I watched the dumping dog owners from my window a few times and knocked on the glass when dog squatted. It stopped. People West Hartford are pretty civilized overall.
5
When a neighbor refused to pick up after his big dog, which defecated in front of our house, time and again, week after week, my tall father took a shovel, scooped up the poop, brought it across the street to the man's two-family house, and threw it into the vestibule.
The guy never walked his dog in front of our house again.
13
Which is more likely? That neighbor is an unhinged homicidal dog hater? Or that dog is barking incessantly and driving neighbor crazy? Based on my experiences, the latter is far more common. I'm a dog owner, by the way.
88
One would hope that the neighbor would have rationally discussed any problem with the dog’s owner and the co-op board before making threats against the dog.
1
It seems like there are a lot of dog haters responding. Even the respondent in the article itself somehow projects that it's the letter writers fault and doesn't believe the author. Glad you don't handle letters from sexual assault victims. I doubt if this letter writer will turn to the New York Times for any future advice. Even if the dog barks and is noisy, cursing someone and threatening to kill their dog every time you see them is clearly harassment and most likely criminal harassment. Should complain to the co-op board for not maintaining a safe living environment if you have people threatening to commit violent acts.
24
In Virginia cursing someone is a class three misdemeanor--saying she is cursing the dog is illogical. The law should intervene. This is a threat to the person even if someone says they are going to kill the dog and not the person--they are threatening to destroy personal property, a form of stealing. I have dealt with a demented neighbor for years; I've never done anything but be nice, so saying it is the dog owner's fault is not any help. Listen to the writer; don't project some possible other scenario. Answer the question asked. Has the neighbor asked the dog owner politely to do something logical to keep the dog from barking--nothing in the request says that. The answer is useless. As the police told me once, "being mentally ill is not against the law." So protect your animal by never leaving it alone outside. She will poison it. She will hit it to provoke a bite that will be the basis for legal action. Your only alternative is to be vigilant, especially if the board has no concern for the animal's right to live peacefully. If, however, there are any issues with your pet that training can alleviate, try those first, so the neighbor does not have a leg to stand on legally.
3
How dare you blame this on the dog owner! Horrible answer.
This is not an issue to take to mediation, and it’s not the time to try to sweeten the sour neighbor with plates of cookies. The dog owner needs to avoid that crazy dog hater for the safety of her animal.
I live in a freestanding home with acres of land around it, yet I have a neighbor who hates my dogs and (I am 99.9 percent sure) attempted to kill one of my dogs with poison years ago. That dog survived, barely, after a prolonged stay in intensive care. I have avoided even eye contact with that neighbor ever since. Some people are simply twisted, angry and vindictive, and they will lash out and harm you, or those you care about, if you give them a chance. Many people hate dogs and use them as a focal point for their rage.
Keep your distance, ignore anything the neighbor says, distract your dog with treats when that neighbor accosts you. Above all, don’t take the bait. It sounds like the neighbor is trying to provoke you and the dog so either or both of you will act out. That way the neighbor can make you lose your dog.
I would keep a journal with notes on every threatening encounter you have had with your neighbor. The police may not be willing to help you, but if this ever came to a head and there was an assault on you or your dog, or a civil suit, the notes will help your case.
Above all, don’t let that horrible person frighten your dog. That might make the animal feel he needs to protect you.
48
I’m a dog lover and have a dog, and there is absolutely no excuse for threatening or endangering either an animal’s life. However, with that said, I question why someone would hate your dogs so much—are they barking outside frequently and for long periods? Are they menacingly barking at passers-by? There are many ways dogs can be poor neighbors and poor citizens. We all have a responsibility as dog owners to prevent poor dog behavior. It’s not a free-for-all of round-the-clock dog fun at the expense of others’ peace and enjoyment of life. Same with children, I suppose.
12
Our neighbor had "zero tolerance" for barking. He was an ex-military helicopter pilot in the Gulf war and later worked flying a helicopter for the AM traffic report for a local TV or radio station. He slept during the day and our dogs barking occasionally were a problem. He slept with his windows open, and considered closing them a totally unacceptable imposition.
He refused to give us his phone number to discuss the situation, and when we went to his front door he met us with a loaded and cocked 9MM automatic. He liked to sit on a bench next to his driveway in the afternoon while cleaning his weapon. Any attempts to discuss the dogs, did not go well.
Eventually he decided to sell his house and move on, but it was 9 years of keeping our dogs inside, all day, while we were at work, so they would not be killed by our neighbor.
14
I'm probably your neighbor. (minus the gun threats). Define: the dog barking "occasionally." I know from long experience, many of us as neighbors have a radically different definition of "occasionally," particularly since the dog barking for the owner frequently falls in the category of domestic bliss. Not if it's in my living room.
8
The sound of non-essential helicopters (tourist, limo, media) is nerve-wracking to a lot of people.
If you have a Pit Bull, your neighbor has a legitimate complaint and simply wants to kill your dog before the dog kills someone. Need to know if it's a breed issue before deciding whether it's you or your neighbor who is the problem.
9
"Pitbulls are not a specific breed of dog and there is a great deal of misinformation about them. Unfortunately, they are one of the most abused dogs and are used for dog fighting by unscrupulous humans. When I was growing up in Brooklyn, it was German Shepards that were feared, then came Doberman Pinschers, Rottweilers and then the pitbull. If you educate yourself, you'll learn that they're just big cuddle bugs that only want to be loved. Petey from The Little Rascals was a pittie and back in the day, they were considered nanny dogs because they were so great with kids. https://www.pitbullinfo.org/
2
Ugh pit bulls are NOT a dangerous breed. Yes, they can be TRAINED to be dangerous, but they are not inherently dangerous. One can train ANY breed to be violent-the disposition and behavior of the dog depends on the owner. It is this bias that leads to the creation of pit bull bans across the country. I’m so happy that I live in NYC with my pittie and chihuahua. The chihuahua, by the way, is the “mean” one.
1
Thank you for bringing this up. I wondered if it was a pit bull as soon as i read the phrase, "dislikes my dog," thinking that perhaps the neighbor had read about the record number of people in the U.S. killed by pit bulls last year (not to mention the thousands of pets and livestock).
4
Ask your neighbor why she wants to kill your dog.
It is possible that it barks (or perhaps yips and screeches) every single second when you are not there. If you hear it barking as you return home, you may mistakenly think that it is barking to greet you.
Months of constant yipping, whining and screeching when you are trying to sit calmly and read (or sleep) would be enough to drive many people crazy.
117
In most cases in my building, I much prefer the dogs than some of their snooty acting owners.
28
It's *always* the owners. The dog is just being a dog, and it is trained by the owner to allow this behavior or not. Animals are not neurotic in the wild, only when they are exposed to human beings as masters.
4
There’s really not enough information here to form an opinion about what to do. Is the dog barky or otherwise perceived to be aggressive? Or is it a case of the neighbor just not liking dogs, period, or does the neighbor have deeper psychological issues?
I’d do all I could to keep out of the neighbor’s way, and seek mediation. If all else fails, I’d seriously consider moving rather than risk seeing what the neighbor’s problem really is.
19
Threatening to kill a dog is a police matter, not just a co-op board matter. That the police opted to do nothing doesn't mean they were correct in ignoring the complaint. I'd suggest that if the person continues to threaten the life of the dog that the dog owner go to the police and insist they take a report. Perhaps they might intervene to ask why the person is so upset, which might help resolve the matter.
41
Yes, and I believe the NYPD has specialized officers to handle animal cruelty cases. Maybe trying to seek this out would resolve this better than to have regular patrol officers respond.
13
The neighbor sounds like she's got way more going on that her anger at this dog. I would NOT work this out with her. I'd figure out a way to work out inspire of her.
13
I have often seen miscreants heap threats upon people walking small innocent dogs - both against the owner, and the dog.
But I have never seen any of these nasty bullies, threaten the owner of a Cane Corso, a Rottweiler, a Doberman, or a German Shepherd.
Now that we have found out that it is not OK to threaten women, it's time for everyone to find out, that threating and bulling either dog owners, or their pets, is totally unacceptable.
32
It's better to ignore her. Make sure you are doing nothing wrong like not picking up after the dog, not keeping it on a short lease, not aggressive etc.
If they accelerate to the next step, ie try to harm your dog and starts to non verbally harass you, then you can get the mgt., lawyers, law in.
4
Somewhat suspiciously, the letter writer doesn't mention the dog's behavior at all. Are we to imagine that the neighbor is just a crazed hater of even well-behaved pets? That the board would support that?
Obviously death threats are terrible and absolutely the wrong tactic, but I think just about everyone living in NYC has been driven mad or scared over some dog's behavior - be it noise or growling. And the fact that the board responded the way it did means there may be a widespread perception of this dog as a problem. Have there been other complaints, not addressed by LW, that could have led to this escalation?
LW, in addition to gently approaching the neighbor, should do some hard and honest thinking about their dog's behavior. Do they have a friend they can ask, whom they trust to be honest? Or make a list of well-behaved dog traits (quiet most of the time, non-threatening, non jumping on strangers, etc) and hinestly assess if their dog actually behaves like that.
If not, maybe invest in some dog training and be sure to let the neighbor know.
47
Yes, the fact that the LW is absolutely silent about the dog seems odd. Is the neighbor anxious because the dog barks or, worse, growls? Does it jump up or bare its teeth? How do other neighbors react to the dog? How does the neighbor react to other dogs?
I am a complete dog lover whose dog crossed the rainbow bridge just today He was truly gentle. I had never seen him bare his teeth and he almost never barked. That said, when anyone approached him, especially children, I cautioned them to always ask the owner before petting a dog. With kids, I would get down at the dog's level and be sure I had the leash firmly in hand and that I was close to the dog's face myself. No taking chances...
The dog was also playful and my neighbors had two well-behaved boys who would ring my bell to ask if the dog could come into my fenced yard and play. Or they would be in their own yard and ask if they could reach over the fence to pet him.
Good dog, good kids. But that is not always true. Good neighbors. Good dog owners. Not always true either. In the case of the coop building, it does sound like the woman is a bit histrionic and possibly ill or even dangerous. Then, again, we have no idea about the dog (and owner) to whom she is reacting. Simply because her behavior may be over the top does not mean that the stimulus for the behavior is entirely faultless.
19
I’m so very sorry for your loss. Your dog sounds like he was wonderful.
11
Thank you, Lisa.
1
Dogs can only cause problems in multi family units! Our Co-op Board dealt with the dilemma fifteen years ago! Those who had dogs previously were grandfathered in! We set a no dog, policy for all prospective buyers, thereafter! Everyone has lived happily ever after! By the way, I like dogs, but they deserve and need an area to run around. Not in an Apartment building! And I question the love an owner hasnfo
21
My co-op also adopted a no dog rule. Unfortunately, people have gotten around that with "emotional support dogs".
8
I have no sympathy for dog owners who do not "manage" their dogs. I've had them allow dogs jump on me, bark loudly, attempt to bite or snip at me. My friend had multiple stitches in her foot and difficulties walking for months after a neighbors "sweet little dog" bit her in the food when she was satnding in our yard taking pictures of flowers. The owners reaction was "she is so sweet and never attacked anyone before". This dog owner's attitude was that somehow the victim of this sudden, unprovoked assault was the victims fault. Or another's case of having to endure eight painful rabies shots into the stomach area because someone let the "sweet" dog loose and it took several weeks for the police to find the dog, but by then the treatment had begun. I love animals and they are not at fault - inconsiderate, arrogant or just plain ignorant people give many dog owners a bad reputation. Manage your animal, you may love it but others may be in fear of dogs, some for very valid reasons. If you can't take care of your pet properly and respect others peoples feeling then you don't deserve to own a pet.
66
You're absolutely right, Impedimentus, but none of what you say is part of this real estate article.
My neighbor's dog barked constantly. It wasn't even something I could get used to, and I love dogs. But I figured it wasn't the dog's fault. The neighbor was a lousy neighbor, dog or no dog.
6
Once again, you assume that the dog owner was among the inconsiderate dog owners who allow their dogs to behave as you described.
While it is possible, it is also possible this woman is unhinged and dangerous and violent.
8
The attitude expressed by the questioner is, unfortunately, typical of many dog owners - not even thinking how their dog's behavior might be provoking this reaction. Was it the dog barking in the middle of the night, waking up the neighbor? Perhaps it was the dog's barking all day long while the owner is out at work, driving the neighbor crazy. Dog owners seem to have selective hearing loss, with the frequency of the dog's bark becoming impossible for them to hear. (I once knocked on a neighbor's door to ask if he could stop their dog from barking continuously. He asked, When is the dog barking? I replied, At this very moment!)
And I think it's a little condescending to wonder what could be done to "lessen her anxiety around your pet." Why put the onus on her? Why assume she's anxious, with its implication of being slightly unhinged, or unreasonable? It's much more likely that the neighbor has tried to put up with constant disruptive noise, and has finally reached the end of her rope. Living in New York is often stressful and intrusive, and if you can't have a little peace and quiet in the one place over which you have some control, it becomes unlivable.
94
my sweet little pitbull mostly growls and only rarely bites people, and only nasty people I might add !
So, what's the prob, haters ??
BTW, 'Brawler' is my friend and my emotional support.... and we get a real kick out of stealth doodooing on the fat neighbor's front lawn...
3
While I am entirely sympathetic to the problems of non dog owners (and considerate dog owners, for that matter) with inconsiderate dog owners who let their dogs bark incessantly, (across the street from me), defecate on my property (I have no dogs) without cleaning up, ruin my plantings by urinating on them, and overturn my garbage can and upset things in my garden when they get loose, run off leash and scare the living daylights out of me, why the presumption that the dog has been barking all the time? It is one thing to suggest checking into this possibility, quite another to assume the dog owner in the wrong without any evidence. A threat to kill someones dog, is extremely serious. Violence toward animals is often the predecessor of violence toward humans. At the very least this is a threat to commit a tort to destroy another's property. If someone threatened to blow up your car would you brush it off as a reasonable response? There is absolutely no evidence presented in this problem that the woman in question has requested the owner to make any changes with the dog or that the dog has presented a specific problem, like barking all day, that is upsetting her.
I fully acknowledge that there are far too many inconsiderate dog owners, and have personally experienced much unpleasantness because of that fact.
But there are plenty of completely unhinged unreasonable people in the world that are not dog owners and are just as inconsiderate and entitled.
6
I do not know whether or not the dog has displayed objectionable behavior. However, the neighbor has. Threatening statements are illegal. The dog owner should invest in a digital recorder, obtain evidence of the terrorist threats, and then proceed with pressing legal charges if an attempt to calmly explore and address the neighbor's concerns is futile.
42
Too right!
2
It's possible that the dog barks constantly when its owner is not home, so the neighbors get the brunt of it and the owner is clueless.
That doesn't justify the ugliness of the neighbor's outburst, but the owner should consider the possibility.
39
The 19th century leaders of a Methodist camp meeting town on the Jersey Shore once issued a statement, "Dogs are an annoyance to everyone except their owners and we wish people would not bring them here." This might have been a bit extreme, but non dog owners likely have a lower tolerance for barking than pet families. Do you know how your dog behaves when left alone? It may not bark when you are at home. There are all sorts of phobias in the world. I was always uneasy around dogs as a child after being bitten by a dog who ran over from another house. I too would suggest that you approach the person and inquire about how the dog annoys them.
38
After 20 years in a "no pets" building, a young woman moved in upstairs. She got a phony psychologist's letter and brought home a yippy dog. The girl's behavior generally was immature (letting mail build up in common areas, registering her car in Daddy's name--protracted teenager stuff), and I predicted that if she ever moved out she'd probably have Mommy help her. When that did, in fact, happen, it was a warm summer day with windows open. As the dog barked at this and that, Mommy audibly said, "Wow, that dog barks a lot!" I couldn't resist, and out the window I exclaimed, "It sure does." Cue the high-pitched screeching: "That's a lie. He does not." Mom's opinion, my opinion, the facts before our very eyes, none of it mattered. Princess didn't care. Now we live in a house with a big yard, and the doggy derangement syndrome continues in a different way, with trespassing, aggression, and failure to clean up. If your neighbor dislikes you and your dog, she might have good reasons.
55
Or she may have no reasons at all but feel free to make random violent threats .
9
This is ridiculous. The dog owner has not said they or their dog have done anything wrong. The dog owner's neighbor is threatening to commit a crime and verbally abusing the dog owner, but the police won't get involved! Get an attorney to contact the police department and insist that they do their job. What other criminal threats should this person have to tolerate? Advising someone to coddle their harasser is disgusting.
28
The police won't get involved with threats to the dog because "just" verbal threats--no matter how nasty and threatening--are not considered to be "actionable"---unless, and until, it escalates to physical violence.
I was told this by police in my hometown (not NY) after I called them about altercations with a deranged neighbor. They even refused to take a police report. I imagine it's the same for dogs (property or not). On the other hand, NYC laws may be different.
In my view, going to the neighbor one on one is a terrible mistake unless you record everything! Better to find someone in the bldg. who is friendly with the neighbor and ask them for ideas on how to handle the situation. And that may not be the best option either. Certainly going one on one with a person who has cursed at you and threatened to kill your dog is a BAD IDEA. You are potentially putting yourself in danger and your dog with no one there to witness or defend you if things turn ugly. I would write a letter to the neighbor. You need to establish a paper trail. So I would write a polite letter which is also factual. I would also consider filing harassment charges against your neighbor. There are many levels of harassment; you can check the codes for NYS. The main idea is that YOU feel threatened. You should also tell the police YOU feel threatened by the neighbor. You can point out that the person has threatened a violent act against your pet, which is your property, and that YOU no longer feel safe in this environment. Ask the police to speak to the neighbor. You should check the harassment codes before going to the cops again. I would not let this pass. You have to make a strong response. I would suggest a letter documenting everything and saying that you feel personally endangered by the threats. Keep in mind, the police are often unaware of the full details of the harassment laws. You may have to remind them. What you are going through is not ok. Good luck!
17
Some owners do not have their dog on a leash. They notice you are disconcerted and they go, "but he won't hurt you."
That is until the mongrel almost takes a bite off you, and they say, "oh, I haven't see him do that before."
And they give you the evil eye, as though you are somehow at fault for Duke trying to make a snack out of you.
Advice to dog owners -- treat your dog like your child, don't forget to feed them, clean up after them, and keep them on a leash.
39
Most towns have leash laws. Dog owners aren't above the law - sometimes they have to be reminded.
3
My dad worked as a garbage collector for a number of years. Every dog on his route were in the palm of his hand. How? He'd collect scraps and pork chop bones that became treats for these beasts. Tails wagging! You don't need to be dog whisperer to get on their good side.
20
I love this story.
8
I am sure your father meant no harm, but dogs should never be fed cooked bones because they splinter when chewed and can puncture the alimentary tract.
5
"she curses at me and threatens to kill my dog"
Is it just you or does she behave this way with all dog owners in the building? Just curious. Clearly you are dealing with a bully here, and possibly a mentally unbalanced bully. It's up to you of course, but I would not follow the Real Estate columnist's advice because it is not wise to respond to threats with niceties. The next time she threatens you, consider letting her know in a firm tone that you don't appreciate what she said. Bulk up your body language whenever you see her. I don't mean engage in a stare down but demonstrate "no nonsense" body language. Carry protection (whatever is legal in New York) at all times but especially when you are with your dog. Keep your dog on a leash and do not let the dog out of your apartment without you. In short, hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Document all encounters with this person. Good luck.
33
Great advice, @Lynn in DC.
5
Threatening to kill the dog is a reasonable reaction ONLY when the dog has posed a clear, ongoing threat to the neighbor's physical safety in some way. Unless the dog's owner is complelely delusional, chances are they know whether their dog has behaved aggressively enough to warrant that kind of response. The advice in this column doesn't seem to take into account that the neighbor just might be loony tunes. Every apartment building in New York, from the toniest Fifth Ave co-op to the shabbiest Bronx tenement, has its share of mentally deranged residents and the best course of action is simply to ignore them the way you'd ignore a crazy lady screaming at people in the street. If you're going to live in New York, you've got to be able to deal with the crazies.
9
This is stupid advice. It is obvious that the period of ‘reasonable’ is over or never was. I advise using smart phone to record. This is not a court case. Just a coop thing
34
'“Underneath the surface there might be reason for the anger,” said Brad Heckman, the chief executive of the New York Peace Institute, an organization that provides free mediation service for New Yorkers.'
Isn't it about time that we address adults' behavior, not the underlying reasons behind it? Schoolteachers, yes, need to consider their students' often deep-seated problems because they are young -- but at one point we just have to realize that childhood problems harden into intractable criminal behavior.
The corner drug dealer shooting off his gun and killing children in their beds through flimsy walls cannot be psychoanalyzed and made whole. The serial killer, the man who casually gut-punches women in the street, the man who abuses his wife and children, serial liars and cheats like Donald Trump -- they're all of a piece: incorrigibly damaged and unpardonable.
I no longer care why.
The neighbor who is cursing the dog and its owner cannot be reasoned with. She needs to be held responsible for her behavior and told to desist. If the building management will not deal with her, get a lawyer.
37
Of course, the phrase "reason for the anger" might refer to the possibility of the dog's incessant barking when the owner is away from home.
But in that case, the woman would surely have said something earlier about the annoyance. It would have been clear that there's a reason for her animus. Of course, she could be senile, but that idea wasn't advanced either. That's why I leapt to the other scenario -- that she's purely spiteful. You know, like the guys who toss their beer cans into front yards.
"she curses at me and threatens to kill my dog"
If that is true, then the angry person sounds unbalanced. I see the points of the article writer regarding legalities, but at the same time, normal people do not stand there look at you and say "I want your dog dead."
Maybe we arent getting the whole story. The dog owner says nothing about the behavior of the dog, which makes one wonder if the dog is a barker, etc.
61
According to the LW, It's worse than "I want your dog dead." She said she "threatens to kill my dog." I'm surprised the police would not get involved when there is an active threat to commit harm.
That said, I hate city dog owners. City life is cruel to a dog, and bringing an animal into the lives of others is always a potential threat. You simply cannot know what an animal will do in every situation. Small dogs are not an exception or an excuse, and certainly large dogs are completely inappropriate in the city.
On the other OTHER hand, threats to kill are no joke. I would attempt to get her on the record--either by recording your polite conversation or in writing. If she is really crazy, she is a danger to everyone.
16
Dogs are "inappropriate in the city" only when their owners work very long hours, as city folk do, and do not have time for them, but leave them to dog walkers and doggie day care. Otherwise, dogs are "inappropriate" also in the suburbs given the same sort of owners, in that no one would leave a dog loose on the streets in, say, West Hempstead either.
Or in small towns like Stockbridge. I've never seen dogs wandering loose along Massachusetts roads.
Perhaps in rural areas people do allow their dogs to wander. But perhaps that's why there are so many shelter dogs available in other parts of the United States. Too many lost animals; for that matter, too many puppies born. Lots of high-kill shelters in the country. You have to wonder where dogs are better off, after all.
7
I have been lucky. I have lived in my home for 20 years and for the most part gotten along with my neighbors, I am proud of that and value it. Most all of the conflicts that have happened on my street have been because of peoples pets (Invasive cats and barking dogs).
14
All it takes one eccentric cranky neighbor to cause trouble for everyone else. There's no preventing that happening.
So Yes, you are lucky.
12
People who abandon their cats, or fail to spay and neuter and keep them safe indoors are the ones causing trouble, especially for the cats.
1
I'm a long time dog owner, and in situations, have met reactions such as what the LW describes. Recently one of my neighbours commented on my dog, when she saw him approaching and briefly barked, with tail up, waving and soft, with soft body posture and ears forward. She likes him and he likes her and they were happy to see each other. However, he thought that dogs only bark in aggression, and as a prelude to a potential attack. He was able to tell me this, and in return I explained how dogs have different barks, and I could assure him that bark was "hey Andy! I haven't seen you in ages and I'm happy you are here." Often as my dogs get older I can tell from their bark or growl when a car comes up our rural driveway, who it is without looking. But I don't expect others to know that.
Dog owner needs to respect the complainer, even if LW doesn't understand it. I agree with the approach of the columnist. To it I would only add: document these interactions, and the language, etc. of your neighbour. Sadly, you may need it one day.
61
I think you inadvertently hit upon the issue the author was trying to prove. No one wants a dog that isn't theirs barking or advancing at them, or both. Period. Full stop.
For every harmless, "Hey Andy..." interaction you claim is charming, there are many more that happen on a daily basis that run the gamut from annoying to scary to actually dangerous. Dog owners forget that to the rest of us, for all intents and purposes, all dogs are the same.
No offense; I'm sure your dog is special. I'm sure it's a snowflake. However, to me, it's loud, or dirty, or menacing and no matter how much dog owners may think the onus is on me to tolerate or even love their pet, the reality is that it's their responsibility to keep it from infringing on my personal space or from disrupting our shared spaces.
I'm really tired of dog owners who say that people should "lighten up" about their pets. They have the wrong end of the stick. Even to this animal lover - and dog owner - it's hard to make a case that society or regular rules of decorum should bend for any one dog rather than the other way around.
89
Clearly, yes because common society decorum is to tell your neighbor whenever you see them that you are going to kill their dog. What society do you live in? I am not an animal lover, not a dog owner and I don't really like dogs but threatening to kill a dog whenever you see it clearly crosses a line.
14
I agree with your main argument, that dog owners are responsible for their pets and to insure their pets do not annoy and harm others.
But jumping to the conclusion without any evidence that this dog has somehow adversely impacted this woman beyond the fact of its existence is uncalled for.
7
Three years ago I moved from a house that I built, loved and lived in for 24 years. I moved to get away from new neighbors dogs. After a couple of years listening to them barking all day long it was too much. Repeated calls to the police, city attorney and alderman didn’t have any impact. Sorry but I’m not sympathetic to people that assume their dogs have a right to degrade the quality of someone else’s life.
162
Sue them in civil court.
6
My neighbours' children do far more to degrade my quality of life than any of the many dogs living in our neighbourhood. It seems that parents no longer believe they should supervise their children, so we have them screaming underneath the windows of other peoples' houses, breaking branches off fruit trees, pummeling each other, throwing rocks on top of garage rooftops, and shrieking at the tops of their lungs for hours as they run around in packs. It's Lord of the Flies in our neighbourhood and if one asks the parents to constrain their little darlings in any way, the response is dismissive at best. Dogs make better neighbors than children. I’m not sympathetic to people that assume their children have a right to degrade the quality of someone else’s life
40
From the letter, we don't know why the neighbor dislikes the dog and by extension its owner. It could be that the neighbor is afraid of dogs or just doesn't like dogs. I would not assume that the dog is "degrading" anyone's life without facts to support that statement. I agree with the approach of the columnist and hop it will restore harmony.
9