Perhaps there could have been a little more regard for sex work calling the women sex workers instead? Otherwise a great article.
The photos of these beautiful woman brought tears to my eyes. "Beauty is truth, truth beauty,' – that is all Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know."
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@ Andy , The so called sex workers that retired rich were probably expensive call girls to begin with, these ladies look like they walked the streets and probably poor , without the benefit of an education , and most likely rape victims in their childhood . And yes if you must bring the scent of politics into this , indeed the world is a scary place , when people are poor and desperate , when their families sell their children to the sex industry to get money and one less mouth to feed , those are their life issues . Have you ever been to Thailand ? That is where child predators go , beautiful country but as everywhere else poverty is endemic .BTW if the overarching themes of print stories and articles here are not to your liking , might I suggest just don't read the NYTs you might find a better fit elsewhere. This is a thought provoking article thank you Adriana.
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Outstanding work, Ms. Zehbrauskas! Have you considered taking this subject around the world?
And if there are no similar refuges for former prostitutes in the US to support, shame on us.
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Fantastic and moving story/pictures. NYC should have something like this, for as long as sex work is stigmatized and illegal at least...
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Makes me think about people who believe that prostitution should be legalized. Not! It's sad.
It's degrading. It's just plain wrong. The women (or men) who sell themselves should be helped. Those that exploit them should be punished. Metropolitan Mexico City is what - around 22 million? These few souls are just a tiny drop in a very large bucket.
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use, abuse, then throw away....such contempt for human life. its so sad people...women, have to endure such disrespect.
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It's ok, Rosa. I just did some of the crying for you.
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Caring for aging prostitutes. What a concept by our neighbors just south of here, descendants of the first inhabitants of the Americas. Good luck asking Americans to dig a little deeper into their pockets for such a program here.
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For me this is also a reason to subscribe to the NYT. This type of articles that show "the suffering members of society."
Yes. They all talk about disgust and displeasure--and desire to forget.
Generally in places of economic distress, ravages of war (the French Revolution, aftermath of WWII in Europe) women resort to this as a survival mechanism.
Like Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz said: O cual es mas de culpar...la que peca por la paga o el que pagar por pecr? (I guess I should translate "O who is to blame - who sins for the payment or who pays to sin).
I also would like to know where to make a donation.
Muchisimas gracias
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How can I help???
I wish to complement the writer and photographer for this sensitive article about women who, now, have found a safe home after years of suffering.
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The overarching theme of stories and artices in NYT is the theme "The World is a Scary Place". Fear is a way the Oligarchs manipulate the masses. For example regarding this story: There are many more former Mexican sex workers who were good with their money and who retired rich from the profession (by Mexico standards) in their 30s with more than enough savings to pay cash for nice houses and who went on to do more reputable careers. These women in this story have other life issues that made them destitute, it was not sex work per se.
Astonishing. You probably believe that everyone on public assistance is a welfare queen too.
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Amazing: That even from the fetid ground of human depravity can grow a wild and resilient stem - and these women are it’s beautiful and variegated blossoms..
Thanks, NYT, for publishing this!
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These women need to tell their stories to the young girls who may follow them. There must be a way to escape.
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RE: said Jesica Vargas González, the shelter’s director. “It is still a very stigmatized occupation.”
Of course it's stigmatized as it should be.
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Precisely why I love the NY Times - sharing the stories of and shining light on those who are all too often invisible.
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Thank you for this article. So many humans need sexual healing, I hope we can eventually figure out a way for that to happen that is not destructive to others like these women.
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Be nice to gather some young sex workers to meet these ladies and hopefully, find a different path forward. Thank you for reporting on a forgotten group of people. Sending them best thoughts.
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Beautiful story
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Very Interesting, but this feels like it could have been a much longer article rather than the few paragraphs provided. It feels like we barely scratched the surface. I would love to read a full magazine article on this.
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A touching story and nice photos as well. It illustrates the counter of sex is fun. It's not if your survival depends on it. It's not if it lacks love.
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Another excellent example of why we need real journalism. Thank you, NYT. A touching and powerful piece. If possible please post information on how one can support Casa Xochilquetzal.
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An excellent model to replicate here in the US? More convincing - and shaming of the perpetrators - than wearing black to the Golden Globes.
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Someday, worldwide, prostitution will be unionized.
Sex-workers and patrons will be adult only.
Work-hours will be strictly regulated.
Work contracts will be standard with the rest of the economy: Medical, dental, retirement, housing, educational.
Patrons will be limited to only what is on the Menu. They will sign up first, a contract with the House, and any violence will automatically put them in jail. The fine on any violation will be split evenly between the House and the woman, and there will ALWAYS be a fine and the fine will ALWAYS be public.
Without any of these protections, the sex-worker is only a sex-slave, the equal to an ISIS captive.
And, speaking of "religion", until religions take up the PROTECTION OF WOMEN instead of spending all their time demonizing and sneering at women or denying birth control or abortion and just generally whining about all those girls getting pregnant then it is clear that religion - any religion - is the enemy of these workers.
Religion needs to remember when it once got its wealth from the funds offered to the ancient churches for the use of their "temple sex-workers". Those workers were BOTH males and females. Later, the Church of England had the "Winchester Geese". Even Calvin took his cut from prostitution every morning. In fact, that money built his Academy (where no women were allowed.)
It's the 21st Century, not 2018 BCE.
My very best to these ladies. I'm glad you survived.
I'm glad you have each other and help from others.
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There should be homes like this the world over.
Surely you've heard the saying: prostitution is 'the world's oldest profession.' At this point in history, don't the workers in the world's oldest profession finally deserve respect for their arduous labor and, thus, appropriate retirement care?
It should be universally acknowledged how many women (girls) and men (boys) spend their lives selling their bodies, having been brought up to believe that their humanity was worthless and they had naught but flesh to offer. Isn't it time we acknowledged that, so long as human civilization is controlled by ambitious men who dominate the planet by force, not by reason, there will be war, there will be inequitable distribution of goods, human relationships will be marred by inequality and exploitation, and there will inevitably be those who are forced to survive by prostitution?
Isn't the history we learn in school a long account of which man won what war when? World history certainly isn't punctuated by increasingly emotionally mature and respectful diplomatic negotiations as the centuries pass! It's the same tedious story, again and again: bullying.
What are the spoils of war? Land and women. ...And, what are the spoils of corporate conquest? Ask Harvey Weinstein. Difference? None.
Our self-serving, violent patriarchal culture has created this predicament. It is high time we rebuild our culture on ethical principles instead. This beautiful retirement home is an outstanding model!
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What was the need to wrap the story around their former employment? If you must then have them tell a "What's the worst thing you ever did to someone?" rather than this make believe. They have clearly never taken care of themselves, exercised etc. they look far more run down and out of shape than their age along would justify. It's a "don't be like this" story.
We tend to forget, that there are women in other countries who unwillingly become sex workers , not by their own choosing but forced into it by economic reasons . Cannot even begin to imagine what their lives have been like ; surrounded by cruelty, coarseness , and abuse. These are feeling , hurting human beings that are more often looked upon as trash . Thank you for bringing their plight to light , may God keep them in his grace . Please follow up with this story.
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These photographs rank amongst the best I have seen in a NYT article. They are, simply put, phenomenal! Kudos to Adrina Zehbrauskas.
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I, too, am subscriber. Thank you for a wonderful piece of journalism.
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Please NYT, some follow up info on how we can help, send donations. I am very impressed to read about this home and service provided to these women. God bless them.
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Stigma, discrimination and criminalization of sex work are the real problems in Mexico and throughout most of the world. If sex work was decriminalized, giving sex workers the same rights as other workers, these sad stories would not exist. I am sure this is a haven for retired/semi-retired sex workers but why are they still being "regulated?" No daytime TV and forced ceramic and cooking classes? Has their past profession relegated to a status that denies their agency or ability to make their own decisions?
Thank you for the thoughtful article but please address the bigger picture.
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There is a photography and interview book about Casa Xochiquetzal, "Las Amorosas más Bravas," (Tough Love) by Cecilia Gómez Ramos and Bénédicte Desrus.
You can find a selection at
http://www.worldpolicy.org/sites/default/files/uploaded/image/Spring15_6...
I was at the book's presentation at Casa Xochiquetzal. It was extremely moving to hear these women tell their tales of despair and hope.
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Also check out the work of Bénédicte Desrus from a couple years ago, http://thestandglobal.com/tough-love/. Very powerful look at the same place.
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It breaks my heart to think of the stories these women cannot tell of the abuse they suffered at the hands of the men who paid them for sex. We have to think of why all that is unspeakable and do everything we can to work towards a world in which that dynamic simply does not exist. Considering how far from that we are, it seems terrifyingly next to impossible. Houses like this are a compassionate step towards the recognition of that need--far more than the demands from the "sex industry" to legalize so that it can consume more and more women into the same unspeakable narratives of lives lost serving men sexually.
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What happens to aging and elderly prostitutes in this country?
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A truly heart warming story conveying a profound message of love and compassion. One that uncovers the tender human side being offered toward our most in need fellow human beings. A sweet lesson of hope and kindness.
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I appreciate getting to read about the women that survive however they must, and the people that do their best to provide shelter for them. I wish there were more stories like this in the world. Thank you for pursuing this story.
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The life these women have lived is etched deeply into their faces. Pride, strength, trauma, loneliness. There for the grace of our circumstance go we all.
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I'm deeply moved, reading of these women, and that they have found a safe harbour. Their personalities emerge from the stunning portraits accompanying the article. Brava.
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Excellent story/reporting. I feel heartbroken for these women, though. As some others have asked, is there any way to donate to them, or those in similar situations?
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Wonderful story. Yes -- where can one send support?
Every one of us has a heroic story to tell.
It was a shock to realize that almost all of these "old" folks are younger than I am. They did not live in some mythical past, but later than I did.
God bless them.
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Thank you for sharing stories like this--stories that give voice and image to the pain of women marginalized by society. That there is hope and belonging for the women in this story, in spite of the pain, is even better.
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Great article. Thanks for writing about this wonderful place. Every woman living there has, no doubt, led a brave life. Some women have amazing strength. I am an admirer.
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Thank you for an uplifting (if poignant) story, with magnificent pictures of some strong (& pain-filled) women.
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Wonderful article.
And a memorable reminder of reading "The Legend of Xochiquetzal" in Spanish class in high school in the US midwest in the 1960's.
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The author's portraits are stunning--each woman is so awesomely beautiful. The photograph in the print edition is ravishing and startling. Thank you for showing us these faces.
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I love this story and these strong women who stand proud in spite of the path they had to take to survive and, in some cases, give their children a better life.
Love Ms. Aguilar's poem! And yes, how can we support these ladies. In so many ways, their new home sounds more appealing than an upscale assisted living community.
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Thank you, NY Times and Adriana Zehbrauskas for sharing with us Casa Xochiquetzal and the stories of these brave women in Mexico City. Beautiful story, beautiful photographs.
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Ladies, Thank you all for allowing us into your lives. As a man, I am humbled.
Ms. Aguilar, the quoted part of your poem is of such noble and poignant grace. Thank you, thank you. If it can be, please share more.
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I wonder how many other small, obscure corners of the world there are where the humanity of others waits to have a light shined on it.
Kudos to the NYT for a lovely story.
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The photos really capture the beauty and tragedy of these women, as well as the diversity of their experiences. I hope these women are able to find peace in their lives.
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At the end of the day, we are all human -- even those whose lives are damaged by difficult choices. This article gives me hope and a warm fuzzy feeling that there are at least some people who still care for others and that we can still care for people many would just as soon forget. What a fantastic organization serving a completely unmet need.
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Hot tears flowed from this poem. They were burning from all the sadness of these lives and what has been lost from them. Ms. Aguilar, this is from your soul and you touch others with your poetry. I hope there will always be someone there for you, to share in your pain and your heart full of love. I feel your love and embrace all that shines forth within you! Keep your poetry flowing. Thank you, deeply.
I am the one who loves you
I am the one that listens to you when you are sad
I am the one that comforts you in your nights of pain
I am the one that warms you when you are cold
And even when you ignore me
I’ll always be there for you.
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What a gorgeous article and portrait of these beautiful and strong women. Thank you. Thank you.
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Most women have sexual intercourse of one sort or another.
Agreeing to have sex more or less on demand, as part of a deal that also provides fairly steady income from a partner and at least minimal help raising one's children, is called marriage.
Agreeing to have sex for pay, because of a lack of better job prospects and a lack of anyone willing to be a decent child-raising partner, is called prostitution.
It's just sexual intercourse. Yet women in one situation are admired and the others are despised by others and taught to despise themselves.
Gender bias and structural economic inequality drive this vicious dichotomy.
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"Agreeing to have sex more or less on demand, as part of a deal that also provides fairly steady income from a partner and at least minimal help raising one's children, is called marriage."
That is a rather simplistic, misguided, and wrong definition of marriage.
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To MLChadwick of Portland ME:
Your reduction of prostitution to "it's just sexual intercourse" is an egregious and appalling oversimplification of the wrenching psychological dynamics that would drive a human being to use his/her most intimate body part as a means of base commercial exchange with strangers with whom the seller has no lasting interpersonal relationship. How utterly debasing, to have one's genital organs (and thus one's self) reduced to merchandise, not recognized as belonging to a human who is a being not just of body, but also of mind and spirit, whose autonomy and free will are in fact "unalienable" birthrights.
I agree that "gender bias" drives the historic problem of prostitution, and just about every other problem of Western civilization, including "structural economic inequality," but I cannot agree with your cold abstraction of the predicament suffered by these women.
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Sad. You forget to mention that crazy little thing called love that makes a marriage work. I'm still a believer.
How can donations be made to Casa Xochiquetzal?
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Just Google it.
It looks like they have a Twitter account, you could maybe try contacting them there? https://twitter.com/CasaXochiqetzal
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They have a Facebook page. Check there.
This is just one of several excellent glimpses into Mexican culture and and life published recently in the NYT. This is why I subscribe. Thank you.
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Thank you Ms. Zehbrauskas. I hope this is only the first glimpse of what appears to be a story rich with characters, verse and photos. Keep up the good work.
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Thank you, very much!
This is why I subscribe to the NY Times. Where else would I get to find out about aging prostitutes in a large city? At the end of the day, they too are human just like the rest of us! Thanks for letting us know about their lives in this sea of 7 billion people.
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Agreed. I have never read such insightful, amazing journalism. I never imagined reading unique articles like these. Most news sources publish similar stories. In me, the Times has a loyal reader for life.
The story and photos of Casa Xochiquetzal have been covered extensively in other media outlets. But it is good to see the New York Times covering it as well.
"...they too are human just like the rest of us! ..."
Human Yes, just like the rest of us, No!
Beautiful photography. Hopeful story ... that the world offers these women a caring, quiet place where they can heal. I love that they are given craft & cooking lessons and that the TV is not turned on during the day. That, somehow, they can find their own inner gifts.
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The photography is poor, and it's a shame. The subject matter is there, but the shooter did very little with it.
Is there a place where we could send money to support this good work?
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Yes.
https://casaxochiquetzal.wordpress.com/donaciones/
I can vouch for the place, having visited it a couple of years ago for the presentation of a photography book documenting it. A remarkable project.
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It looks like their website is here (in Spanish) but includes a link to donate: https://casaxochiquetzal.wordpress.com/
They also have a Twitter feed here: https://twitter.com/CasaXochiqetzal
(Note: I am not affiliated with them, but interested in donating, too, and found these links via google!)
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Good Idea David,
Just some money to keep this place open, maintenance, upgrade....
Touchingly reported topic and story -- mil gracias.
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Very good article, interesting how they are overwhelmed with regret, most of these are tortured souls who have gone thru a lot in their lifetime, there are unfortunately many stories like these all around us. I wish y’all the best.
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