Why I Quit Driving

I didn't learn how to drive until I was 21 and didn't get my license until I was 23. I'll be 25 this year and I absolutely detest driving. I jump and scream whenever I get on the interstate. I freak out on bridges. I hate when someone tailgates me and doesn't back off. Moral of the story: Driving is scary, and when I move to the city this coming summer, I'll sell my car and be done with it completely. Yes, you're right about driving being terrifying, and as someone who's been diagnosed with severe anxiety, it's too stressful and I don't want to do it anymore.

I never learned to drive and mostly don't miss it. When everyone who has a car has to get up to change it to the other side of the street, I'm still blissfully asleep! And I don't have the cost of the car, fuel, insurance, or fears of a fender bender or anything else associated with our car culture.

Good story..and the best takeaway: "Knowing when to stop..." We don't all get dangerous as we age and drive, but we often can use some help. Lots of resources out there: AARP Driver Safety Program 1-888-AARP-NOW or online: (AAA runs a similar program.) Offsprings: talk to your older relatives now about how they hope to have transportation; some communities have many options, some less so. And for those of us aging: best gift we can give our younger family? "Permission to tell us when to stop." Safe driving until then!

I learned to drive in San Juan, PR but never owned a car there. I moved to New York at age 33 and lived in Chelsea, Manhattan, so I did not need to drive. At age 50, we moved to Brooklyn and then I had to buy a car. I turned 81 last November and I feel I drive better everyday. Getting used to drive in Brooklyn where both car drivers and pedestrians seem to be color blind at traffic lights and a "me first" mentality means cutting you off all the time can help one develop great driving skills.

In 1946, my 16th birthday present (from my mother) was my Minnesota State Driver's License. In those days, one need not take a driver's test to qualify. That was good for me - I had NEVER driven a car. The afternoon of my 16th, my mother put me behind the wheel of our 1937 Dodge; my dad (NOT in favor of MY newly acquired Driver's License, was mowing our yard - near to where our car was parked). As I started the car, put the shift stick in position and 'jumped' away from the curb and into the street (my mother at my side), my dad raised his arm and yelled: "I don't care if she does learn to drive, she'll NEVER drive my car!" My mother said to me "there are too many women who have to depend on their husbands for 'car' transportation - that's only one of the reasons I want you to learn to drive." SMART WOMAN!!!

I got my license at 30, but as a New Yorker, never owned a car and never drove. I moved to western Massachusetts 3 months ago and here I am at 60 with my first car. I'm wrestling with the reality of driving, (lessons, advice, practice), and hoping I don't have to do many trips over 15 miles. I don't miss NY, but I do miss public transport. I have a few decades before I'm an octogenarian, but Uber will likely be getting plenty of business from me.

We lived in the Bronx, initially without a car. Eventually my father bought one, learned to drive, and he was fine. But my poor mother... in her 40's she made a valiant attempt to learn, with an instructor, but she just couldn't get the hang of it. I was scared to death to ride with her, which she sometimes asked me to do during her learning phase, and I was (selfishly) relieved when she gave up trying. Fortunately she liked to walk, for miles if needed, and of course there was always the subway.

Since cars are generally driven on publicly financed roads shared with other drivers, driving IS public transportation. Cars are so much more powerful and nimble than they were a generation ago that you need the reflexes of a jet fighter pilot to stay alive. Overly-aggressive drivers, production cars that can do a sub-5 second 0-60, distracted drivers, massive SUV's that cause blind spots for other drivers make it much more difficult for otherwise competent drivers to operate safely. Sara Jane's self-knowledge in hanging up the keys is laudable, but it's only one part of a much larger picture.

I can't wait to retire and move somewhere that doesn't require owning a car. Driving has become so unpleasant as society gets more self centered, arrogant, selfish and just plain rude.

I moved to Seattle from suburban Connecticut 11 years ago...I haven't had a car the whole time I've been here in the Emerald City and I find I am often walking faster than the cars...everyone driving looks miserable as they wait light after light...horns ahonking...as I stroll along...I will never own a car again!

At 82, I've given up too. My eyesight and reflexes were just too soggy to continue.

Kudos to you for your personal insight in giving up driving before being forced due to a tragic error. I got my license when I was 19 and at 67 while experience helps I have adjusted my driving to reflect changes in my changing reflexes. I can only hope I'm as self aware as you if and when I have to give up my privilege.

Thank you for giving up your car. I wish that my father would give up his. One of the most important considerations when I retire (about 15 years from now) is to live someplace where I can function easily without a car. That could easily include my current home where I live five blocks from the subway. Even now, the less I drive the less I like to drive. I cannot imagine that it will get better with age.

I'm 67. One of the reasons I moved from Henderson, NV to Chicago was so I wouldn't have to drive. I will be trading in my driver's license for a IL state ID very soon. There is life without a driver's license.

Some experience with the ‘love of the car’. When we finally set down on the upper west side we gave up our car - at the least it saves us some $5000 per year for garage and insurance without even starting the engine. Previously we used the car for transportation to our summer home in upstate NY. Across from our home, an octogenarian - WELL INTO HIS 80s - would routinely drive his car for local chores. I would observe him at times during such outings and would tell,my wife, “when he is on the road we will stay home”.

a wise and compassionate decision. you put other peoples' safety (and your own) in front of the freedom driving gave you. If only there were more people like you!

Very smart decision!

I started driving at 16 in NJ. License at 17. Then I did a stint as a tractor trailer driver from 22 to 25. Moved to NYC in 1981 at 26. We dabbled with car ownership off and on ever since. I even kept my truck license just in case I might have to use it again until a few years ago. I just got rid of my (hopefully) last car this past summer and have never looked back. Give me walking and public transit every time. The rest of the country and now unfortunately, the rest of the world, are stuck on an individual freedom trip that includes driving yourself everywhere and owning your own gun! Highways and guns, the great American legacy.

It seems to me that you made the right decision to quit driving, Sara Jane. You appear to be comfortable with your decision, even though you miss “the sense of freedom,” as you said. I’m “only” 73, and a young 73 according to many of my friends, but I know that my day will come. When my father was 83 (just 10 years older than I am now), I was visiting him in the Midwest for the holiday season. At one point, he was driving on a street that he was familiar with, a street that he had driven on for many years, and he sailed right through a stop sign. I said, “Dad! You went through a stop sign!” He said, “Did I? I didn’t see it.” Soon after that he quit driving. He had never had an accident since he began driving at age 15, and he didn’t want to begin at age 83. He was sad, but he was OK with it. As I flew back to Connecticut after the holidays, I wondered how many other stop signs he had gone through (and how many near fender-benders he had avoided), but had never told me about. When he later wrote to me to tell me that he was no longer driving, I breathed the proverbial sigh of relief.

A wise decision. I wish my mother had made that decision some 10 years before she did, but, alas, one is much more isolated in most parts of America than you will be in the NYC metro area. Florida in particular most be a horror show for pedestrians and other drivers.

Good for you. so many children worry about telling their parents they should no longer drive. They anguish over it. Lose sleep. But you did it voluntarily. You are a star.

I grew up in Brooklyn and we couldn't wait to get our driver's licenses. Bought my first car in 1977, it was a used 1969 Olds Cutlass-S. Our house did not have a garage so I had to battle the ridiculous 4 day per week Alternate Side Parking rules. The ASP was eventually reduced to 2 days per week. Later I was able to rent a neighbor's garage. The most she ever charged me was $50/month, cheap even in the 1980s. My current home has a driveway and there's no ASP On S.I. anyway.

Good for you ! Recognizing your limitations before a major catastrophe There is,however, another big factor. The suburbs provide very little in the way of public & affordable transportation for all those who can not or will not take on having a car.Some don't even have sidewalks. You are fortunate to have friends, family & can afford Uber. Many many can & do not. The government of the suburb needs to step up or be pushed to step up.

"Eventually I passed the driving test, and received my license at the age of 40," Your story reminded me of my mother. My dad did most of the driving in our family but he was a homebody, never wanted to go places. Plus, he kept the same car for 20+ years. We were embarrassed to be seen in his raggedy old 1954 Ford. My sister and I begged our mother to buy a new car and to get her own driving license. She was 45, possibly close to 50 when she finally passed the driving test. Took her at least 3 tries. Thanks for sharing your story. It brought back warm memories of my parents.

My sister attended Bishop McDonnell high school. I remember the gorgeous building and wonderful auditorium. Those were the days. I want them back!