This article and some of the comments focus on the issue of time and how we use it. We're constantly told that this or that product will help us in our hurried, hectic, overstuffed, multitasking-worthy contemporary lifestyles. I'm inclined to question whether we feel so overburdened justifiably or because we're told we feel that way.
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Too, it's probably mature to realize and accept that it's unrealistic to think you'll be happy all the time. Life is hard, the odds are increasingly against the majority of us - i.e., the working class - and the crazed materialism that is now accepted as de rigueur for Americans is a recipe for misery. So, for my part, I try hard just to be grateful for whatever good health (because without that, nothing really matters as much) and financial stability I've been able to attain, look to people rather than possessions for what meaning my life has, and to accept that I'm not going to feel very happy sometimes but that's just the way it is. On those days, it's best to remind yourself that there will be another, better day around the corner, and do the best you can to get through the rough times. Trying to enforce happiness 24/7 is a fool's errand.
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Volunteer!
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“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
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"A more helpful way to look at this idea is to find purpose and meaning at work."
No, thank you. Employees are disposable, human resources departments are heartless, and one would be better informed to leave work as it is: and exchange of time and skills for money. Then, when the layoffs do come, life will not lose as much meaning. "Studies do [not] show that" working for 10¢ an hour in Bolivia or Bangladesh will bring you purpose and meaning.
Remember, Mr. Herrera, that your readership is worldwide.
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great advice- for those not working 4 jobs, not living in a ghetto and not struggling for mere survival. in other words, for those who have the luxury to contemplate happiness and lack thereof.
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I find moderate exercise (light weights (50 min) and treadmill (35 min)) 3 times a week is a great mood enhancer. Does wonders for the minor musculoskeletal aches and pains we experience as we get older.
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Count your blessings!
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"Find purpose and meaning at work." I'm sorry, but if this means what I think it means, it is not always possible to find purpose and meaning at work because some work doesn't pay well and is just incredibly boring, meaningless, purposeless, repetitive and soul-sucking. Said "work" is just a means to an end, and the end is that you get to live in a cheap apartment, wear clothes and eat. "Find work that has meaning and purpose" is much better advice, but those jobs, alas, are rare and hard to find.
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The first tip on conquering negative thoughts suggests that we ask ourselves whether the negative thoughts are based in “fact” or “feelings.” Am I the only one who ruminates over negative things that are based on cold, hard, objective facts? My feelings can change. Facts do not. Any strategies for removing negative, fact-based thoughts?
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As a single woman in my sixties, I struggle with lonliness and depression when winter hits ( Iam not alone in this, I live in Seattle after all).I am grateful for my job at a flower shop but even more; swimming class has saved me! I swim 3 times a week and for me, water, is a healer of painful joints and leaves me feeling content and relaxed. And I have a new slew of friends too!
When I was a teacher and my children were still living with me , I couldn't commit to anything other than work and family. Now I have the time to commit to this.
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How exactly does one conquer negative, fact-based thinking about what the Trump international crime family, team, appointees and Republican party are doing to our democracy?
That's what so many of us, I believe, need help with.
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All the suggestions are very valid and useful, yet I am astounded that the vastly most important advice for true (and meaningful) happiness has gone missing. Is that because seeking a purpose from a higher power is too controversial? Could it not have been parsed separate from religion with just the advice to help others? I cannot fathom giving advice to anyone seeking a way towards a happier life without this most precious self-rewarding wisdom...."become happy by making others happy."
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I suggest that "find purpose and meaning at work" is better phrased "find purpose and meaning in service to others." After all, many of the unhappiest people hate their jobs, if they have jobs at all. And automation (e.g. self-driving vehicles) are eliminating or soon will eliminate all kinds of jobs. Research has shown people serving others has profoundly positive impacts on mental outlooks, including bio-chemical changes of endorphins and serotonin levels, as well as increased empathy.
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Although I do most things in my life by myself, I particularly find it helpful to buy more time. I recognize that there are some things in life I like to do and I am good at doing, but other areas that I do not enjoy and/or am poor at. So I outsource the latter when it makes sense: I pay for a regular house cleaner, and I have occasionally paid for grocery shoppers. I pay others to fix my car and to give medical care to me and my family members. This desire, however, runs up against needing more money, so I think more money (even above $75,000 annually) can purchase more happiness.
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I have to tell you, I make considerably less than $75,000 a year, but I have a lady who comes in once a week to vacuum, dust, scrub toilets, mop, and do the occasional intensive cleaning jobs that I don't want to do, and it's great! I also do my grocery shopping online now, which means that I have a personal shopper who goes through the store and does it for me, and that has been wonderful, too! It is all a matter of one's own personal priorities, and I feel as rich and pampered and happy as the Countess on "Downton Abbey!"
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Doing Community Service and really be with people that I am participating with, brings me great Happiness. Really looking at people is another wonderful thing to do and pray a prayer of joy for them, no matter what.
It makes the world a big place.
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Happiness should not be the goal. Aim for life satisfaction instead.
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I believe time is the most precious thing we have and I encourage people to understand that they will never have enough time for doing what they are postponing to do now in exchange for more work. More money means more responsibilities, more management so more money will never make you happier, this is the false premise our society is recruiting more workers.
I don't agree with encouraging people to "buy more time" while participating in the gig culture of hiring staff for your daily tasks. In the article: The shut in economy by Lauren Smiley, you can see that people generally work more when they have that extra time they buy. I believe people need to relax and look at things in perspective. Do you take enough care of your body? Are you in touch with your feelings? Do you prioritise yourself (needs, feelings) or do you live other people's lives? A bit of journaling and meditation can increase your awareness and your sense of control over your life and make you much happier than any uber eat or amazon prime. Don't buy in this culture of consumerism, focus on what's inside.
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I agree - I meditate while I vacuum & clean the bathroom, money saver & satisfaction.
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People who spent money on conveniences like take out food were happier???? Not all of us! Take out food is fattening, costly and not always tasty. And not so fast considering you need to pick it up and/or wait for a delivery to arrive. The huge popularity of the NYTimes food page attests to the fact that even busy people find cooking relaxing and rewarding. Thirty or so minutes from fridge to table. Mozart and a glass of merlot as I chop vegetables--THAT is happiness!
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I'd rather spend that 30 minutes with the merlot and a book rather than chopping vegetables, which I find extremely boring. And you can get great non-fattening takeout in New York or Paris. A chacun son gout.
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I’m confused: in this article you state that folks who take advantage of time-saving purchases, such as buying take-out for dinner, are typically happier than those who don’t, but in a related article about where the happiest people live it states that these folks do not consume “processed foods”! What gives??
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Paradoxically: allow yourself to be sad. Explore the root cause for your unhappiness and cry it out; maybe even find meaning in it--but stop short of indulging in sadness. Catharsis is a road to happiness too.
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To me, the key to happiness is to realize how fortunate I am, and to remain cognizant of all the many things I should be grateful for.
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Having a hobby really helps me to step out of autopilot every week. Enjoying a nice classical concert also helps me to unwind.
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how are any of these 4 steps easy or easyish - they each sound like something requiring a lifetime of work
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Exercise!
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simple, excellent and profound advice!
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"find purpose and meaning at work"
Not applicable to those who are retired.
How about participate in hobby clubs and do charity work?
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Good point G.S. Perhaps it would be better just to say "find purpose and meaning". Some of my secrets of a very happy retirement are to take sailing lessons, practice yoga, walk the dog A LOT, volunteer at a farm that provides experiences and training for the handicapped and underprivileged, oh and throw out the TV.
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Not all work comes with a paycheck. I'm a fairly good cook
and take great satisfaction in cooking for family and friends,
especially over the holidays. It gives me "purpose and meaning"
and but believe me, it's work!
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Or find purpose and meaning in whatever you choose to do.
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