too much time on a beach as a child and I'm now having 6 monthly skin cancer checkups - so don't do that.
the other day after a reef walk, I saw a collection of maybe 8 young girls maybe 6-7yo - first covering an older girl with sand - then frolicking at the water's edge - one jumped before the oncoming 12" wave - misjudged its speed, and landed right in the peak of the wave - oh ! Learning is fun.
The joy of watching small kids is everything is an adventure - just walking is a frolic, a dance, a kick of the heels, a jump and skip - pure joy to enliven an old person's heart and lift everyone's spirits.
Thank you for such a beautifully written piece. I resonated with every word of it.
Reading your story made me smile and brought back memories of the summers at Wildwood Crest with Grandmom and Poppy, weekends with friends from New York and the unforgettable moments here in Italy on the beach. Thanks.
Like "...Peaches" below, I am one of those without children. However, this piece made ME smile. I love to watch other people with their kids doing exactly what my family did when my sibs and I were small. For me, the beach is all about shrieking children and teens with boom-boxes and everyone smelling like a coconut cream pie. When I want to read, sometimes the beach in the winter is a nice option. Thanks, Dr Klass!
1
There is nothing better than wrapping your eight year old granddaughter up in a towel and holding her tight to warm her up on the beach. Thanks for your thoughts.
Ditto KC. So beautiful. Our youngest is 17, and I'm feeling more and more the approach of them all being away. The other day I saw a mom with her three kids in our neighborhood. The oldest (8 ish) was a good bike rider, the second (5?) learning, the third on a tricycle. I passed them, said hello, and felt a little sad and nostalgic. Then I heard the youngest fall and wail. I didn't feel so sad after that. ;)
that was moving. thanks!
This says everything I've ever felt but in a beautiful way. Thank you, Dr. Klass!
4
There is no better place than the beach!! With or without kids! I loved the days on the beach with my little people covered in sand and ice cream and I love sitting there with them now even if their head phones tune me out. If I say I am going to the beach, they are always happy to tag along!
2
Thank you for this evocative renembrance of times past.
6
Packing now to leave for Maine and this is bittersweet to read. We are watching our oldest prepare for the last phase of HS while the youngest is inching closer to being a genuine teen. We finally gave up the Jersey Shore with its kid-centric activities for more low-key fare. I don't know who's more excited- the parents who can finally relax or the kids learning to spread their wings. Thank you for capturing those stages so eloquently and for a preview of those to come.
1
Perri Klaus you never fail me; your writing so full of insight and heart. I am almost 70, and i watch at the beach just like this, every season of my life playing out right in front of me. It's one of the few public places left where multiple generations interact, mostly happily, and we all get to see lots of real bodies at every stage of life. thanks for the great piece.
10
Very well written. As a senior citozen still working full time i watch life in all its glory in all stahes daily whethet i am at work or out for a walk or shopping for groceries. This great drama is unfolding around me all the time.
3
Heading to the shore tomorrow for our week of bliss. Being in the ocean all five of our senses are engaged at once. taste the salt, feel the cooling water, see the waves coming, hear the gulls, smell the water when the waves break, and this all leads to mental tranquility!
6
This article SO resonated with me because we just spent a week at the beach with our adult children and our 2.5 year old grandson. Thank you for putting my feelings into such beautiful words!
5
What a beautiful piece. Beaches are one of the few public places that haven't been eviscerated by the retreat to private screentimes.
8
Poetry - thanks
7
You put many years of my thoughts into words. While I don't have children myself, I remember being a child at the beach. I often visit a Gulf Coast beach in Florida and love people-watching for exactly the reasons you detailed so eloquently. Thank you!
4
Thoroughly enjoyed reading this...it captures the family beach experience so well.
10
As someone who never procreated, that has always been me, burden-free and novel reading, trying and often failing to enjoy the beach while all the moms and dads drag their screaming kids onto the sand and spread out with way too much stuff (some of which they invariably leave behind), and the teenagers blast music from portable speakers (it's not always listened to via headphones). Different perspective. There are people who do not have children, you know.
4
Of course, how could we ever forget? You never give us a chance. Every parenting blog or forum childless (excuse me, "child-free") people show up to remind us of their existence. Tell me, do you troll forums on other subjects irrelevant to your life, too? Do you post on stamp-collecting forums to tell people how stupid stamp-collecting is, and how virtuous you are for never having collected stamps? Seriously, I just don't get it. This is a big newspaper with lots of sections in it, plenty else for you to read and comment on.
30
There are, as you remind us, people who do not have children, and self-absorbed people, too. There are no people absolved from accepting the many minor inconveniences of living in a broader society, complete with children, radios, seagull-attracting-potato chips, and the like. I don't know you, so will not say who you are or what your character is, but your post of fewer than 500 characters is self-absorbed and selfish. I'd ask for more than 500 characters before judging you - honestly I have a plank in my own eye - but want to say that the notion that beaches should not be whirligigs of multigenerational mayhem is simply wrong. We live with each other, warts (and beach balls and bad choices in music) and all. We accept that others have children - and that others do not - and that others want to play whiffle ball while we read "Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine"
24
I certainly do not think everyone should have kids. But...your parents had at least one. You were one. Do you expect that kids should just disappear from the landscape because they do not personally interest you or, worse yet, irritate you? Do you think those who have them should tiptoe around those who do choose not to have them? I am all about respecting public/personal space (and teaching my children to do the same), having manners in public, and just generally being a good citizen and part of a community, so, yes, manners from all ages are appreciated. I would imagine you are equally critical of drunken adults urinating in public, blaring music in public spaces, or being obnoxiously loud? Or adults who just simply have no sense of public manners or are not good citizens/contributers to their communities? Or do you just reserve your toxic attitude for those who, gasp, are out there actually enjoying the sun, the sand, the sea, *and* their families rather than burying their faces in books and wishing everyone else would bend to their desires? No, children should not be treated like spoiled royalty and allowed to behave any way they wish in public, but neither should those without them expect a kid-free environment outside of one's private residence, a retirement community or hospital. Get over yourself. You will be gone one day. So will I. Without kids, the world stops.
17
If you believe that children should honor their parents, then you want them to remember their youth as fondly as possible: don’t give them any reason ever to curse you for it.
5
There's no question beach vacations are wonderful for families and individuals, but oh my is this piece as vacant as a summer holiday on the boardwalk or what?
5
I disagree - I found it quite poignant, and her reflections quite worth reading.
27
Perfect end of summer essay, every word resonated for me, just got back from the beach -- I suppose I am somewhere in the middle of the arc you so vividly describe: still shlepping stuff but down to two types of sunscreen and managed to finish the novel.
20
Yes--thank you for the memories!
13
We just had our first beach vacation with kids (ours are 1 and 3), and all kinds of memories came flooding back, from my own childhood. That dimension wasn't quite mentioned in the article, but is just as powerful. I'm sure one day I'll enjoy reminiscing about my grown children's childhoods while watching other people, but right now I'm finding immense joy (and a lot of nostalgia) re-living those same moments from my own childhood, now with my kids. Circle of life and all that. The feeling is great!
27
Lovely, Dr. Klass. We now watch our adult children living all this and are so grateful to be around to see it and participate in it. Every stage is sweet.