What a truly impassioned voice of reason. As we see that our black neighbors are not supported by education like whites are and are treated worse by the police it is inevitable that our shared culture not only sexualizes young women and girls but even our food and drugs messes with their young hormones. A culture of male dominance, violence and sex has got to end. One family at a time. One person at a time. Moral and ethical education will not e found at school or on tv. Each parent can set the example and it is an uphill battle against a rising tide media saturation and self interest spurred on by aquisitiveness, greed and lust. We all have it and self control has lost its meaning.
111
Thank you Ms. McMillian for articulating an experience that affects, all black women, but probably many women not "of color" as well. Money can often shied the reality of young women being sexually exploited by male friends and family members as well. ...And don't even get me started on the way that women of other cultures are regarded by male family members. It's well past time for these kinds of issues to come to light. I feel blessed to not have been raped or exploited by most of the men I'll encountered in my life. At the age of 62, I am still being offered "help" from men. At first I viewed this as flattering, until I realized what it would do to my self-esteem.
57
This is a very brave and much-needed call for change. I am a white woman, and hesitated to comment because of it. I will just make an observation: as bad as street harassment has been for me, it is many times worse for black women.
97
""“What was she doing in the hotel room?” he asked.
“She could have been butt naked in that room and it shouldn’t matter,” I replied.
He explained how I was different from Ms. Washington mainly by telling me that she was a ho, and implying that I was not a ho by what he left unsaid.""
This nation's original sin and our collective lack of a deep understanding of the reason why we, as Americans, can have these illogical, incompatible beliefs co-existing inside the minds of most Americans, whether they realize it or not. Our system of education is the glue that keeps Americans uneducated about their own history and the mistakes we keep repeating, generation after generation, perpetuating belief systems, biases, and narrow-minded views on life and each others' place in it. If education is designed to keep whites ignorant of their past and inure to the suffering they perpetuate through their lack of social consciousness, that same redacted education has the effect of perpetuating what writer Son of Baldwin calls misogynoir in Black culture and rape culture throughout American society.
We need to revolutionize every facet of our education system, from fundamentally changing what it is we teach of our history, to adding back humanities and critical thinking, preparing our kids to manage their relationships with other adults and, eventually, their children. Most of all, we need to change the basis upon which we evaluate our sense of humanity. It is broken.
---
www.rimaregas.com
“She could have been butt naked in that room and it shouldn’t matter,” I replied.
He explained how I was different from Ms. Washington mainly by telling me that she was a ho, and implying that I was not a ho by what he left unsaid.""
This nation's original sin and our collective lack of a deep understanding of the reason why we, as Americans, can have these illogical, incompatible beliefs co-existing inside the minds of most Americans, whether they realize it or not. Our system of education is the glue that keeps Americans uneducated about their own history and the mistakes we keep repeating, generation after generation, perpetuating belief systems, biases, and narrow-minded views on life and each others' place in it. If education is designed to keep whites ignorant of their past and inure to the suffering they perpetuate through their lack of social consciousness, that same redacted education has the effect of perpetuating what writer Son of Baldwin calls misogynoir in Black culture and rape culture throughout American society.
We need to revolutionize every facet of our education system, from fundamentally changing what it is we teach of our history, to adding back humanities and critical thinking, preparing our kids to manage their relationships with other adults and, eventually, their children. Most of all, we need to change the basis upon which we evaluate our sense of humanity. It is broken.
---
www.rimaregas.com
53
I salute the candor. I wish there was a lot more of it.
70
Excellent story. Two incidents this past woke me up about the free passes given to sexual predators. One, as mentioned here, R. Kelly. A great story was written on Soultracks.com by an African American woman, who said enough is enough, no more free passes for R. Kelly. Great story, but the responses were stunning from both male and female, African Americans, Caucasians, and others. They trashed the author, saying R. Kelly has been wronged by the media. There were far more pro-R. Kelly stances than anti-R. Kelly posts.
Part II: 500 Startups CEO Dave McClure was/is known for forcing himself on women. One woman -- an African American -- was allegedly sexually assaulted by McClure and she recently wrote about it. The responses on message boards heavily favored McClure, not his victims, saying he was wronged and the good he's done in the tech industry outweighs his mistreatment of women. Both men and women strongly supported McClure.
When the likes convicted rapists like Mike Tyson (who has had a few of his own TV shows), R. Kelly, and Dave McClure, are strongly supported, these awful actions will continue. It's time to dismiss and shame sexual predators.
Part II: 500 Startups CEO Dave McClure was/is known for forcing himself on women. One woman -- an African American -- was allegedly sexually assaulted by McClure and she recently wrote about it. The responses on message boards heavily favored McClure, not his victims, saying he was wronged and the good he's done in the tech industry outweighs his mistreatment of women. Both men and women strongly supported McClure.
When the likes convicted rapists like Mike Tyson (who has had a few of his own TV shows), R. Kelly, and Dave McClure, are strongly supported, these awful actions will continue. It's time to dismiss and shame sexual predators.
133
A startling indictment of black culture.
43
Not of Black Culture but of some Black people who do not see the worth of Black girls and women.
77
How so?
7
May the courage and emotional honesty of these words give EVERYONE pause. Who ARE we that this (continues to) exist in our society? THIS is why Trump's "grab 'em by the pussy" comment framed as "locker room talk " is an OUTRAGE. That comment (and there were many others, to be sure) should have ENDED him. Full stop. And before privileged white people (and I am one) start dismissing this story, this horror, as more "evidence" of the depravity of black men, just stop. And consider again Trump's words and the willingness & readiness for his white Christian base, men and women, to overlook this very same depravity in him and the white male boys' club.
201
It saddened me to read Ms. Cottom's piece and, even as a white woman I understand the dilemma completely. Years ago my brother-in-law said that women enjoyed catcalls as they walked in the street, to and from work, to lunch, whenever. I told him that he was incorrect, that this male behavior made us uncomfortable. Unfortunately, women, no matter their color, still have to endure these double standards, although black women must bear the greater burden.
104
I think blacks make a lot of assumptions based on a false premise. That premise is that whites have a cohesive culture like blacks do.
When you have a cohesive culture, you can take data from a small subset of that culture and apply it to the whole culture and be reasonably confident that a majority of people in that culture will fit into your model.
This works great for blacks and other minority cultures. For blacks I can take a group of 20 and 19 of those 20 will be Democrats. I can therefore assume that 95% of blacks are Democrats. This assumption holds true because blacks have a culture that is strong.
Lets say I go to Boulder CO and take a group of 20 white people and 19 of them are Democrats. Can I assume that 95% of white people are Democrats? I can, but if I did I would look pretty bad when the vote tally comes in.
Blacks come from.a strong and unified culture, and judge us whites from that perspective. I never even thought of myself as white until 2015, I have no idea how I would even define "White Culture." I dont think I could, because there in no unifying white culture that all whites follow.
This is why these assumptions always ring so false to me. Blacks and whites need to stop thinking that there is some unified white culture that they can make assumptions about by studying small groups of people. You can only make assumptions that hold true for subsets of white people, which to me proves that there is no white culture.
When you have a cohesive culture, you can take data from a small subset of that culture and apply it to the whole culture and be reasonably confident that a majority of people in that culture will fit into your model.
This works great for blacks and other minority cultures. For blacks I can take a group of 20 and 19 of those 20 will be Democrats. I can therefore assume that 95% of blacks are Democrats. This assumption holds true because blacks have a culture that is strong.
Lets say I go to Boulder CO and take a group of 20 white people and 19 of them are Democrats. Can I assume that 95% of white people are Democrats? I can, but if I did I would look pretty bad when the vote tally comes in.
Blacks come from.a strong and unified culture, and judge us whites from that perspective. I never even thought of myself as white until 2015, I have no idea how I would even define "White Culture." I dont think I could, because there in no unifying white culture that all whites follow.
This is why these assumptions always ring so false to me. Blacks and whites need to stop thinking that there is some unified white culture that they can make assumptions about by studying small groups of people. You can only make assumptions that hold true for subsets of white people, which to me proves that there is no white culture.
12
If you are black (which I am) you understand that black people are not monolithic either, especially not in today's society. That myth no longer holds true.
73
One place where change might start is to turn the word bitch into the b-word, just as we've adopted the n-word, and then be "crazy women" until the word bitch disappears from the lips of men.
30
Thank you, Tressie McMillan Cottom, for uncovering a type of sexism that is so pervasive, destructive, and difficult to address--and for doing so with fearlessness, clarity, and brilliance. And thank you to The New York Times for providing space to discuss these issues. I ask that you please consider offering a regular column for Ms. Cottom to further educate your readers.
89
Like who asserts these things? Every race article starts out with a bunch of really wierd assumptions that arent backed up in reality.
Like that white people see black girls as able to handle more pain and as more adult. Researcher do a small scall study with a poor design, then use the results from a very small group of people to say ALL whites think black girls can take more pain.
Another thing, most of the people who survive sexual assualt are white, and these white kids arent always treated as traumatized children.
My brother, who is white like me, was raped by our babysitter with me there. As far as I remember, the police and my parents treated him way more like an adult then they should.have treated a 5 year old boy.
These assumptions and the horribly designed too-small studies that support them paint us whites are just too evil for me to believe. Racializing everything takes away from the idea that things like sexual assault can happen to anyone, even a rich little priviledged white 5 year old boy like my brother. Afterwards, adults and police can be crass towards anyone, not just black girls.
Also, these assumptions fail bc there is no "White" culture. I never even thought of myself as white until 2015. There are whites from LA to NYC that believe a whole menagerie of different crazy things. You really just cant make broad assumptions about whites bc we dont have a cohesive culture.
Like that white people see black girls as able to handle more pain and as more adult. Researcher do a small scall study with a poor design, then use the results from a very small group of people to say ALL whites think black girls can take more pain.
Another thing, most of the people who survive sexual assualt are white, and these white kids arent always treated as traumatized children.
My brother, who is white like me, was raped by our babysitter with me there. As far as I remember, the police and my parents treated him way more like an adult then they should.have treated a 5 year old boy.
These assumptions and the horribly designed too-small studies that support them paint us whites are just too evil for me to believe. Racializing everything takes away from the idea that things like sexual assault can happen to anyone, even a rich little priviledged white 5 year old boy like my brother. Afterwards, adults and police can be crass towards anyone, not just black girls.
Also, these assumptions fail bc there is no "White" culture. I never even thought of myself as white until 2015. There are whites from LA to NYC that believe a whole menagerie of different crazy things. You really just cant make broad assumptions about whites bc we dont have a cohesive culture.
21
She is a professor of sociology, so she can make broad claims about just about everything, and will be correct, because her assumptions are backed up by social scientific methods and data. Your anecdote, while interesting, is academically worthless.
79
Mothers raise the boys who become the men who treat women like ho's.
71
As well as the linked issues of capacity and consent, there are also the linked issues of teenage pregnancy and teenage births.
African American girls and Mexican American girls have amongst the highest rates of pregnancy carried to term in the Western world.
Moreover, shamefully, it took a middle-aged, white male federal judge, appointed by Reagan, to overrule in a scathing judgemen a black president and his female Secretary of Health in order to ensure that all girls, including black girls, could access the morring-after pill.
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/09/us/obama-backs-aides-stance-on-morning...
Kudos to Dr Margaret Hamburg, Commissioner òf the FDA, and US District Court Judge Edward Korman, for courageously standing up to Obama and Sibelius.
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/15/health/behind-scolding-of-the-fda-a-co...
African American girls and Mexican American girls have amongst the highest rates of pregnancy carried to term in the Western world.
Moreover, shamefully, it took a middle-aged, white male federal judge, appointed by Reagan, to overrule in a scathing judgemen a black president and his female Secretary of Health in order to ensure that all girls, including black girls, could access the morring-after pill.
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/09/us/obama-backs-aides-stance-on-morning...
Kudos to Dr Margaret Hamburg, Commissioner òf the FDA, and US District Court Judge Edward Korman, for courageously standing up to Obama and Sibelius.
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/15/health/behind-scolding-of-the-fda-a-co...
16
According to a federal study:
African-American women were 1.75 times more likely than White women to have experienced child sexual abuse (CSA). Having a stepfather or a working mother did not increase the prevalence of CSA. There were no significant racial differences found in the nature, severity, or aftermath of CSA. Some differences of potential importance included: (1) White women were 2.5 times more likely than African-American women to experience CSA before age 7; (2) African-American women were more likely to report the occurrence of CSA during adolescence; (3) no race differences were found in the rate of incest, but African-American women were more likely to report incidence of perpetrators living in the same household; (4) African-American women were more likely to report more than one perpetrator; and (5) White women rated the effect of CSA similarly to African-American women at the time it occurred but as having a worse impact on their lives overall.
Some relevant facts regarding an unpleasant subject.
African-American women were 1.75 times more likely than White women to have experienced child sexual abuse (CSA). Having a stepfather or a working mother did not increase the prevalence of CSA. There were no significant racial differences found in the nature, severity, or aftermath of CSA. Some differences of potential importance included: (1) White women were 2.5 times more likely than African-American women to experience CSA before age 7; (2) African-American women were more likely to report the occurrence of CSA during adolescence; (3) no race differences were found in the rate of incest, but African-American women were more likely to report incidence of perpetrators living in the same household; (4) African-American women were more likely to report more than one perpetrator; and (5) White women rated the effect of CSA similarly to African-American women at the time it occurred but as having a worse impact on their lives overall.
Some relevant facts regarding an unpleasant subject.
45
Can you please list the source of this data. I have ever seen these numbers in my research. Thank you!
5
Thank you for this.
10
It's 11:26 EST on 7/29. Given that the NYT approves comments, I'll guess that I may be roughly comment #15 --#9 is the most recent I can see. Given the Times' prolific readership, the (non)response to this article suggests something even worse than our tendency to believe Black girls to be older than they are: our inability to see, acknowledge or deem them worthy of our gaze at all. This extends into adulthood: Sen. Kamala Harris being admonished for her appropriate questioning of a Senate witness, the Democratic Party's lack of any plan for engaging Black women despite their being the most reliable voting block the party has. We are largely invisible, and if we speak up for ourselves, our simple assertion of agency and humanity is a problem, too.
141
Unfortunately, you were #4 when I read this! My heart breaks and my indignation burns: We must not allow this to persist!
9
Lisa J. I had also noticed that there are few comments, but reached a different conclusion. I suspect that a lot NY Times readers are not of the African American community. I am not, and feel at a loss of what to say. Although the article does refer to male transgressions against women in general, it is specifically aimed at what is identified as attitudes in the African American community. So just what comments from someone like me would be viewed as useful, or insightful? I could say something about similar transgressions and attitudes I have seen in the white community if I had personal experiences, which I do not, but that does not seem to speak to the specific focus of this writer. I considered posting it on my facebook page, but could not imagine what I could say about it that would not make it seem I was pointing fingers. I would like to share it with one young African American friend of mine from FB who posted an awful video of a woman getting slapped several times by a man. My friend thought it was hilarious, (and so did some of his buddies) and that the woman must have deserved it somehow. I thought it was domestic abuse, and said so in a comment, and that no man should ever hit a woman. Still, I found this article deeply revealing, and suspect many other readers also have, and just do not know what they can possibly add to the discussion.
45
As the parent of two daughters,one a record holding buckeye, the other an Arts High School/Juilliard alum, this pointless article made me think of my favorite line to my daughters "But how were you raised?" I'm proud when my baby buckeye met Bill Cosby and Kevin Hart she wasnt some gullible star chaser!My Juilliard alum constantly told me when she saw Usher "We don't harass the famous in NY!" I trust in my parental teachings when "Life forces my girls to grow up fast!"
4
A powerful and heartbreaking piece. I don't want to diminish any of the community-specific specific pain and frustration the author voices. But the last sentence rings true across far too many cultures and countries. 'Home is where they love you until you're a ho' is the same truth that underlies honor killings and many other forms of violence and oppression against women. We are taught from an early age that we only have value while we have honor - and if that is lost, everything else we may have thought we had at home and in our families is also gone. When will it change, I wonder.
88
The author nailed it. This is from another Black woman.
72
A victim remains a victim. To shift the blame is the same as condoning. This woman's experience is probably not uncommon but still not acceptable. We need to hold a higher standard. Our role must be to protect our Princess so that they remain the 'choosers'. To continue to inform of the dangers that exist and to develop in them the ability and willingness to stand for what is right and to stand behind them in support when needed.
The media has its own narrative and intentions, how these are filtered and interpreted within a family are important to help our young women to reject these prevailing views and accepted attitudes.
As for the nearly ready comments, some people need to check themselves and their own beliefs and realise that they are improper and dangerous. This also means checking those around you when these comments surface.
The media has its own narrative and intentions, how these are filtered and interpreted within a family are important to help our young women to reject these prevailing views and accepted attitudes.
As for the nearly ready comments, some people need to check themselves and their own beliefs and realise that they are improper and dangerous. This also means checking those around you when these comments surface.
8
And these are the women who end up having to raise and be responsible for the next generation. Women need a degree of independence and liberation from men. How about a guaranteed annual income for women with supplemental income for children?
15
Government subsidies that faster dependence do not foster independence
8
How about not having children, until you can financially provide for them? Both parents should have to demonstrate their responsibility in advance of creating more babies.
23
Thank you!
5
Thanks for sharing but let's stay away from generalizations. My sisters and I were spared much by very protective parents. My story isn't unique.
14
Engaging and powerful article. This article effectively demonstrates that Black girls are far too often not seen as girls, but yet, rather, as sex objects who are allowed to be sexualized objectified, and exploited and physically and psychologically raped by the larger society. Truly sad!
13
Insightful as always. NYT, when are you going to ask Dr. McMillan Cottom to write a regular column for you? Take a glance at her Twitter feed -- this woman educates like she breathes. As someone who has been a subscriber for decades, I would love to see more voices like hers on your pages.
91
The problems Ms. Cottom identifies have terrible, and often permanent, consequences for women and girls of color. Outlining them in a careful manner, as she has done, is a step toward remedying them. Thank you, Ms. Cottom.
16
But you weren't hyper-vigilant publishing this in the New York Times where some white readers just had their black hyper-sexualization stereotype supported.
6
This is a brave article.
13
Well said.
10
Thank you for sharing a searing truth.
13
This mentality harks back to slavery in its dehumanizing of black females. Girls of color deserve the same understanding of innocence that their white counterparts receive.
Michelle Obama spoke openly of raising her daughters to be confident, beautiful black women. Would that the rest of society reach that high perspective.
Michelle Obama spoke openly of raising her daughters to be confident, beautiful black women. Would that the rest of society reach that high perspective.
38
Just beautifully written and powerfully smart. A must read by everyone interested in the well-being of black girls and women.
24
Powerful and sincere. Tressie without question this piece is going to stir up some some dust.
---You'll soon know who your' real friends are in about 2 more days.
---You'll soon know who your' real friends are in about 2 more days.
14
This was an excellent, very thought-provoking article, however, I do not think this type of victim blaming is unique to black girls and women. I've heard men (not all men of course) and women from all races and cultures excuse horrific behavior like rape and sexual abuse by blaming the victim. (She shouldn't have gone to the hotel, look what she was wearing, etc.) Let's not forget that many in Hollywood still defend Roman Polanski.
I do think the issue with African-Americans goes a bit deeper. With the history of racism and discrimination in this country, when someone from our community makes it, we want to support them, and many are made to feel like a traitor for speaking out against "one of our own". Also, due to the negative stereotype about black men being sexually aggressive, we feel (sometime subconsciously) the need to defend behavior we should be against, fearing that speaking out against someone like R Kelly somehow tarnishes the whole race.
I of course also don't negate the fact that our society does not care about black girls as much as white girls. If the majority of Bill Cosby's victims had been black instead of white, would people care as much? I'm not sure. Though I am positive that if the majority of R. Kelly's victims were white teenagers, he would be considered public enemy #1.
I do think the issue with African-Americans goes a bit deeper. With the history of racism and discrimination in this country, when someone from our community makes it, we want to support them, and many are made to feel like a traitor for speaking out against "one of our own". Also, due to the negative stereotype about black men being sexually aggressive, we feel (sometime subconsciously) the need to defend behavior we should be against, fearing that speaking out against someone like R Kelly somehow tarnishes the whole race.
I of course also don't negate the fact that our society does not care about black girls as much as white girls. If the majority of Bill Cosby's victims had been black instead of white, would people care as much? I'm not sure. Though I am positive that if the majority of R. Kelly's victims were white teenagers, he would be considered public enemy #1.
59
A searing indictment of a culture that devalues women. Shame...
28
I wonder how different this actually is from how white girls are treated. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but teachers and admins don't protect anyone, except their group's reputation. I remember one incident in which some boys in my class were talking about how one of them had raped a girl, but it was OK, she was asking for it because she'd gone into his bedroom. I don't know at what point I realized the most important lesson of my teen years: girls are prey. Maybe it was information embedded in the media at the time, maybe it was inborn instinct. At one point one of the teachers told my class about what would happen if one of us were to accuse a teacher of rape: very little, at the very least the story would be swept under the rug, at most the offending teacher would be let go, however since no report of the incident would go on their record it would be easy for them to find employment at another school. It was the grotesque result of the school prioritizing protecting its reputation over its students, and the teacher's union protecting its members and ensuring they'd have easy access to new jobs. The same is true of celebrities, their minders rapidly move to protect their reputation for the sake of the money they can bring in.
43
Very, very brave of you.
15
Powerful article!
20
"People of color are hypervigilant"......So untrue. Where I work "people of color" say what they want, when they want , how they want and as loud as they want. I hear no filter.
Maybe a filter is what is needed to prevent men and women of color from saying these dreadful things about young women. Stop portraying people of color as victims and acknowledge they have the power to control the conversation.
Maybe a filter is what is needed to prevent men and women of color from saying these dreadful things about young women. Stop portraying people of color as victims and acknowledge they have the power to control the conversation.
22
I am a white woman. I am occasionally outspoken, and increasingly, as I age, I have less of a filter. But there are far more things that I could have said but didn't, than things that I have said. I would imagine that the same is true for outspoken black women (who, by the way, I deeply admire for their courage.) Just because a person reveals most of what they think or feel does not mean that there isn't a whole well of things that they have kept to themselves for many perfectly valid reasons.
35
This brough back memories when I was on a jury for a rape trial about 15 years ago. I'll spare you all the details but it was a case of a black man raping a teenage black girl with the girl providing heart wrenching testimony confirmed by testimony of the best friend of the accused rapist.
We all deliberated the evidence and kept on deadlocking 10-2 for conviction (with all five black jurors voting for conviction). As we discussed what concerns the two holdouts (two UWS progressive women) had about the evidence one finally acknowledged she was not concerned about the evidence and that her acquittal vote was based upon "black men don't get a fair shake in society." I replied that "you know who gets less of a fair shake in society than black men? Black women!"
Everyone was aghast at these 2 holdouts who apparently cared a lot less about justice for a black girl (who would have to testify again in front of her rapist at a new trial) than about their personal politics. I still am haunted by that girl weeping on the stand recalling the rape in front of her rapist and the fact the these two "progressive women" were forcing her to do that again to obtain justice.
We all deliberated the evidence and kept on deadlocking 10-2 for conviction (with all five black jurors voting for conviction). As we discussed what concerns the two holdouts (two UWS progressive women) had about the evidence one finally acknowledged she was not concerned about the evidence and that her acquittal vote was based upon "black men don't get a fair shake in society." I replied that "you know who gets less of a fair shake in society than black men? Black women!"
Everyone was aghast at these 2 holdouts who apparently cared a lot less about justice for a black girl (who would have to testify again in front of her rapist at a new trial) than about their personal politics. I still am haunted by that girl weeping on the stand recalling the rape in front of her rapist and the fact the these two "progressive women" were forcing her to do that again to obtain justice.
207
Amazingly powerful writing about an important subject. The explicit assessment of women in terms of sexual "readiness," the enslavement and trafficking of women ... so related to a culture which embraces sexual slavery and predatory behavior. Chilling.
59
When it comes to this issue, I think a task force for young men is vastly more important than a task force for young women. For too long, we've been trying to educate girls on how to protect themselves from objectification and rape instead of educating the BOYS to not rape or objectify. They are the problem and the solution should start with them.
99
Thank you for writing this important piece. Change happens painfully slowly, but shining a light on truth is the only way to make it happen. Please keep speaking your truth.
11
Thanks to the author who has eloquently framed a challenge to all of us to recognize and respect the valuable person in all of us regardless of gender or race. Here's hoping that the challenge is accepted and we move forward to a better environment for women and men alike.
26
Heartbreaking. How can we, as Ellen has commented, "keep a generation of girls from being harmed, and allow boys to reach their full humanity?" Thank you for this article, even as I cringe when I read it.
36
Chilling description of the perception of black girls' "readiness" among males, and the failure of society to challenge those assumptions. An important piece to jumpstart that challenge.
61
Thanks you for putting in words the stories I hear from friends and loved ones. Once all our truths are out there, perhaps we can keep a generation of girls from being harmed, and allow boys to reach their full humanity.
80
It should not be a "privilege" to not be treated like a piece of meat,
This is powerful and important writing. It is also a vital call to action.
This is powerful and important writing. It is also a vital call to action.
131
Nor should it be a "privilege" to be treated as a human being.
15
Heartbreaking and powerful article. Thank-you
62
Amazing writing. Thanks!
25
Unbelievably sad and heartbreaking
84
A beautifully crafted, raw essay of truth. As an AA woman with a Mom and Dad who over protected her, I thought at time, this work has made me see my past differently, as well asthe future I want to create for my daughter.
13