Love this! Wonderful determination and charisma from Melissa! My 'grandmother' had Polio. She lived a full and normal life, never heard her complain. I did witness her gently whacking the new Minister in the leg with her crutch one day for attempting to help her into the church she had attended all of her life!
1
indeed inspirational for all disabled persons.
this article was very inspirational as it showed the positive side of disabilities. My brother has autism and is often viewed differently from other kids. However, he has several similarities to kids without disabilities. He enjoys activities such as swimming, hiking, watching tv, and joking around. People with disabilities can be just as happy as everyone else. My brother almost always has a smile on his face and enjoys life the way he is.
1
I believe that it is very important to show this side of people with disabilities. If we continue to show the negative and sad side of disabilities we will never be able to see the people with the disabilities as normal. Melissa is a very strong young woman despite her disabilities and looks like she is ready to make a change in todays world.
1
I was interested in Melissa’s article because it was very inspiring and it lead me to a proposition. Just like Melissa stated, disabled people are always so happy. In fact, I have never met someone disabled that does not have a positive outlook on life.My proposition is that I believe disabled people are not put on the earth to stand out or suffer but they are here so that we can be changed from them. They are the ones that teach us so much about life and truly make us appreciate the simple things. For example, my good friend from church is disabled but that doesn't stop him from giving me hugs, smiles, greetings, or just sweet personal texts saying he misses me. He was actually one of the first people that I have met in the church and he made me feel so welcome and gave me a sense of belonging. Why would we pity somebody that has so much care for people? In reality, we should pity ourselves since we get so caught up in life and don't realize that there is so much more than wealth and fame. Just like disabled people, we should take the time to give a stranger a compliment, smile at someone, call a distant friend, etc. I believe they have peer leading classes at my school so that kids can take the time to see the world in a different perspective. It is for the students benefit more than it is for the special ed. Disabled people are truly a gift and they have an awesome superpower of uplifting anybody’s mood.
1
Thank you for writing this book! My daughter uses a wheelchair and I am always thrilled to find books like this. Write on, sister!
4
This inspiring and uplifting story was about Melissa Shang and her quest to create a different view on disabled kids. Melissa herself has Charcot Marie Tooth which is a type of muscular dystrophy. She uses a brace and a wheelchair, but other than that she functions as a very happy, very normal middle school student. Melissa is tired of all the sad stories about disabled kids, She wants everyone to know that they can live happy functioning lives just like anyone else. When her petition to the American Girl Company to make a positive story about a disabled person failed, Melissa took matters into her own hands. She decided to write her won book portraying a disabled girl as the main character living a very happy life with her friends. Not everyone supported her idea, and she struggled publishing her book. However, Melissa had the drive to keep going, and now many people have read her book. Personally, i loved this story and agree with the message Melissa is trying to send. I read a lot, and most books a i read about disabled people consist of their hardships and the help they receive from an able-bodied person. I hope that when uneducated(in the matters of disabilities) people will adopt Melissa's more positive outlook on life and develop a better understanding towards people like her. I hope Melissa continues to passionately spread her message so more people can view the disabled as normal, happy, and functioning members of society rather than just a charity case.
1
Think about you’re stereotypical story about an child with some sort of disability, most of the time we think of depressed kids going up against many different struggles. Why is that? Just because someone has a disability doesn’t mean they can’t be happy or be able to thrive day to day. A person who has a disability may have to do things differently but they can still succeed in completing tasks. From personal experience, my older brother who was diagnosed with Spina Bifida. My parents were told that he would never be able to walk and he would be wheelchair bound. This sounds like it could make for very negative circumstances, but instead Jake defied odds to be able to walk with a walker. He wouldn’t have done this without optimism to keep him going. If someone were to ask me if my brother’s life was sorrowful I would say it was just the opposite. Every time we talk about Jake the stories are never mournful, but rather filled with laughter about his positive spin on life. It is just easier for people to try and understand the concept of disabilities if they can just feel sorry for them instead of taking a step back to see there are so many opportunities that can be raised above negatives. As Melissa said, people just weren’t ready to face the positives in life even if someone has a disability. We should try to be optimistic about the good things in life that can come from the smallest moments. Disabilities don’t define a person, it’s the actions they take that define them.
I just ordered your book on Amazon. Can't wait to read it. Love your positive attitude!
2
This shows that no one is exempt from lovingkindness.
2
You go, girl! The people who think disabilities have to be saddening are adults who just don't get your generation; you guys are so much more accepting and many of you are 'post-disability' in that you see the person, not the wheelchair. My 20-something son has described many of his friends to me without ever mentioning the color of their skin or whether they have a disability, learning difference, etc. There's hope if us old folks just 'get out of your way'!
4
Wow! You can really write! This essay is as bright and clean as any other in the paper. And makes more sense than some too. Keep writing and going and being cheerful!
4
Melissa, thanks for speaking truth to power to adults. For too long, people with disabilities have been cast in the public eye either as noble charity cases or super-heroes. We are neither and both and everything in between. Your book is in the tradition of one of my favorite films, The Intouchables--trailer at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34WIbmXkewU . It's in French with subtitles, but speaks directly to the lead character's desire to live a full life.
Now if you can just convince the New York Times and other newspapers to adopt "people first" language in its news reporting and editorials.
Keep up the good work.
Now if you can just convince the New York Times and other newspapers to adopt "people first" language in its news reporting and editorials.
Keep up the good work.
7
I know I have a disability but I never let it define me.
Why must Melisssa Shang have a doll that has a disability.
I think it's because that is how she sees herself.
She can define herself by her abilities.
She has a ability that most do not have.
She can write.
When she sees herself that way then others will to.
She has to learn it isn't important how others think.
Let them feel sorry for you.
That isn't always a bad thing.
If you don't feel that way then it doesn't matter what they think.
Why must Melisssa Shang have a doll that has a disability.
I think it's because that is how she sees herself.
She can define herself by her abilities.
She has a ability that most do not have.
She can write.
When she sees herself that way then others will to.
She has to learn it isn't important how others think.
Let them feel sorry for you.
That isn't always a bad thing.
If you don't feel that way then it doesn't matter what they think.
1
Melissa, I just ordered your book. I think you are amazing! It is hard to believe you are only in Middle School; your wisdom is far beyond your years. (and you are a terrific writer.)
9
I think it's awesome that Melissa wrote this! I am totally blind, and nobody expected me to ever become a mother, but I became a mother of four, and now a grandmother of one, so far. I've been blind since birth, and have enjoyed life. My best friend growing up, wore braces on her legs, and is now in a wheelchair as well. It's sad that publishers have a skewed sense of what it's like to grow up with a disability. Like Melissa and her friends, we got in trouble, we hung out, we gossiped, we had best friend fights, we became best friends again, just like any other kid. The difference was, I'm blind, and her arms and legs don't work so well. That doesn't mean that our brains don't work the same as other kids' brains, and that we don't want to do the same things that other kids do. It just means that we have to be a little bit more creative and figure out different ways of doing them, and we do. My friend also went on to have children of her own. Growing up with a disability does not automatically make us sad people. If a girl with a disability can't even get publishers to see that fact, then I applaud her for getting the word out on her own! I'm going to get that book for my granddaughter, who is only two right now. VTEC makes toys, the Smart Friends, and there's a boy in a wheelchair, and I made sure that I bought that one for my granddaughter. The dollhouse even has a working elevator, so it's even wheelchair accessible.
12
Bravo to Melissa for this though provoking essay & NYT for lifting Melissa voice here. I'm going to buy this book and read it to my son because kindness, compassion, and acceptance is what we value at home.
I would like to suggest another book, one that we are in the midst of reading now. Denise Ghizzon's autobiography titled, Determination: What I'm All About published last year
I would like to suggest another book, one that we are in the midst of reading now. Denise Ghizzon's autobiography titled, Determination: What I'm All About published last year
2
This piece is wonderful and inspiring! As a parent with a child with a disability who is, with few exceptions, a cheerful, happy person, I was always struck by comments from strangers, friends, family and teachers, that despite all his challenges, he seems so happy. I always wondered why he can't just be happy without the added comments or labels.
11
I agree with this article wholeheartedly. In my opinion, having a disability makes up such a small part of who I am. I was incredibly lucky throughout school and my life to have a group of friends who valued and thought of me as any other friend, not just the girl in the wheelchair.
So often, when we think of diversity, we spend too much time focusing on what makes us different - what sets people apart from others. I think it's much more important to focus on the similarities between groups of people - that's how your form connections.
So often, when we think of diversity, we spend too much time focusing on what makes us different - what sets people apart from others. I think it's much more important to focus on the similarities between groups of people - that's how your form connections.
4
You are awesome, inspiring and the change you (and we!) want to see in the world.
As a mom of a disabled 23 year old, I share your view that people need to see the normalcy of our lives, not pity or think our family is somehow "less than".
I put my mentally and physically disabled child on a bus to overnight summer camp for the 10th year today. She'll be in a bunk of disabled young adults, fully part of the rest of the camp - 500 other kids!
Thanks to those who see the kid first and the disability second. And here's hoping that this essay makes everyone pause and think
It did me.
As a mom of a disabled 23 year old, I share your view that people need to see the normalcy of our lives, not pity or think our family is somehow "less than".
I put my mentally and physically disabled child on a bus to overnight summer camp for the 10th year today. She'll be in a bunk of disabled young adults, fully part of the rest of the camp - 500 other kids!
Thanks to those who see the kid first and the disability second. And here's hoping that this essay makes everyone pause and think
It did me.
12
Very beautiful and inspiring.
I will definitely check out your book.
You've really touched this middle aged guys heart!
I will definitely check out your book.
You've really touched this middle aged guys heart!
2
I have spent too many months in hospital in my life so my saying for living became: 'boring is the new exciting'.
Similarly: being average is the new being exceptional.
Melissa you might be average but to me you are an absolute star.
Similarly: being average is the new being exceptional.
Melissa you might be average but to me you are an absolute star.
11
Another lovely book about a middle schooler with a disability (dwarfism) is The Thing About Georgie. Worth a read after you've finished Melissa's.
4
You go, girl! I adore your pluck and determination. Maybe there is a series in your future. ;)
6
Melissa, you are special.
Wheels notwithstanding, you are ... enabled.
Wheels notwithstanding, you are ... enabled.
2
You are beautiful, Melissa Shang!!!
1
It's just a beautiful body with few restrictions. And the good thing is that those restrictions make it more disciplined. You eat healthy. You exercise moderately. Your deliberations make you more astute. And you got to love yourself. Whoever would like to trade that?
1
I volunteer at a writing center where groups of kids come for field trips to write short children's books. We write whatever the kids want to write.
One group in Spring wrote a book about a girl with an unnamed disability who rescued her service dog. She was the hero of the story.
None of the children in that group of four girls had a disability herself.
The book was not about disability. The only way the reader realizes the main character is disabled is that she has the service dog.
One group in Spring wrote a book about a girl with an unnamed disability who rescued her service dog. She was the hero of the story.
None of the children in that group of four girls had a disability herself.
The book was not about disability. The only way the reader realizes the main character is disabled is that she has the service dog.
9
This is a wonderful story by a young women whom I congratulate with all my heart. Our son is 38 and cannot talk and uses a wheelchair. He communicates that he is sometimes sad, but mostly we see a smart, high school grad who is fairly happy, swims all summer, has wonderful personal assistants, therapists who see hims make continual improvements, had a great at home educational program and is better off than so many people in this world. He is very physically limited, has stuff I would like to see gone as his mother, but because hi is smart, we as a family can enjoy many things tougher whether it is travel, art museums or good TV. So thanks for a story of normal happiness which for any teenager can turn to angst as well. What I am sorry about is that more people, including my family who do not often see our son, cannot see his daily pleasures.
13
Melissa, you are far from being 'your average middle schooler'. I was stunned by your sophisticated writing ability, and more stunned by the maturity of your outlook on life.
I can't imagine how your teachers cope with you!
Best of luck, and I expect that I will be hearing from and about you for years.
I can't imagine how your teachers cope with you!
Best of luck, and I expect that I will be hearing from and about you for years.
18
What a great piece!
7
Melissa, I'm a 38 year old woman with a disability, and I am so with you on this! I'm disabled and happy. And also so lucky. I wouldn't trade in my disability for anything, which surprises people, I think. But it's who I am and in spite of the challenges I completely consider it a gift. Just please know there are older folks out there who carry this happiness with them always. And thank you for reminding me of this quality in myself. I hadn't thought about it this way in awhile.
13
How refreshing to see a forward-thinking, beautiful mind reject the mold of perpetual victimhood enabled by our society and tell her own story. A good many adults can learn from your example. Not to mention your impressive writing! I look forward to reading more of your work someday, Melissa.
13
I loathe the term "disabled"! Despite goal to help people with accommodations, it labels people otherwise abled as DIS. Some people need assistance but it shouldn't come at expense of one's true self, which hopefully is as confident and robust as the author here.
1
I am with you Aaron, I like to think of the term 'differently abled' rather than disability, especially when referring to my own 51-year-old son whose primary diagnosis was autism back when people had no idea what the term meant. He is indeed very abled but in a different manner than most and often better. Kudos to Melissa for her positive attitude and writing ability. She offers more than many of her peers I would bet.
1
My true self IS disabled. Other people's bodies have abilities that mine doesn't. Trying to come up with euphemisms to avoid saying that is just another way of saying that disability is something to be ashamed of. My disability is a part of me, and it has been for my entire life, and if I'm going to be proud of who I am, then I'm going to be proud of ALL of me, not just the parts that work the way that people consider "normal."
3
This is sooo true Melissa! THANK YOU! I have a friend with quadriplegic cerebral palsy. Whenever we went places I spent a lot of time convincing people everything was OK... he was happy - he loved to watch wrestling on TV, eat strawberry ice cream, and shop 'til he dropped. His twisted hands didn't hurt and he loved his life. But people just wanted to feel sorry and sad. His happiness didn't mesh with their sorrow. So it goes. I just bought your book, Melissa, and plan to read it tonight.
12
Melissa (and Eva) - BRAVO! You are changing lives and peoples' perspectives. Thank you. Just imagine, ... J
3
Melissa you ROCK!!
4
You have a strong voice. Please continue speaking.
11
Wonderful essay and congratulations on all of your accomplishments!
9
Thank you for writing this essay. I very much appreciated your perspective. May your happiness and spirit only grow!
6
I recommend a young adult novel by the poet Maxine Kumin, who died in 2014 at the age of 87. During the last two years of her life she wrote a book about animal rights and single parenthood, starring a teenaged girl who is confined to a wheelchair, following a spinal cord injury. The book is called "Lizzie!", published by Seven Stories Press. Melissa reminds me of Lizzie!
3
Just so you know, a lot of people who use wheelchairs don't like the "confined" language. Without my wheelchair, I'm confined to my house. With it, I have mobility, and can go out into the world.
3
Absolutely fantastic. You, my dear girl, are going to have a great, successful life. I am amazed with what you've already done at such a young age. Your entrepreneurship, creativity, and determination are traits everyone --- able bodied or disabled --- can learn from. This piece made my day.
24
Congratulations! What a wonderful achievement in publishing your book (and scoring an editorial in the NYT). I worked with deaf kids for years, and always thought it would be great to have a deaf protagonist with cochlear implants who solved crimes. You know, like a bionic Nancy Drew. Anyhow, maybe you'd like an idea for your next book. Keep up the good work. And stay happy!
10
There's a graphic novel called El Deafo (written by a deaf person) where the heroine gets some sort of hearing aid -- maybe cochlear implants, can't remember -- and is able to read minds as well as hear better. Most of the heroine's concerns are about friendship and not messing up in school. Fun to read!
1
You go Melissa! I set out a few years ago to write a kid’s story about a wheelchair-using superhero kid. I did a little research on the internet about stories starring kids with disabilities, and they starred in stories like:”Physical therapy hurts!” Come on! Regardless of whether life easy or hard, happy or sad, or all of the above, you are more than your disability, you are a complex person like everyone else.
6
AMEN! My daughter is almost 9, athletic, intelligent, rebellious, and a happy extrovert, and also happens to use a wheelchair and crutches to get around. Melissa, your voice reminds me so much of hers, and when she hears you published your own book, she is going to be mad jealous. Thank you for this fantastic piece.
29
I grew up outside of Boston the brother of a young lady born diagnosed with pretty severe Cerebal Palsey (CP). While she had struggles related to her disability throughout our childhood, my parents raised us to treat her like anyone else and her to not limit herself with other people's expectations. We had the normal ups and downs of any family - but my sister has never been seen as a sad person or a limited person becasue of her CP. Despite the dire predictions of the medical community in 1965 my sistser went to the same school everyone else in town went to growing up...got accepted to and graduated college...moved across the country on her own, got a job in California...got her driver's license...met a man and eventually married before moving back to Massachusetts where she owns a home. Her life hasn't been a fairy tale ... although it does kind of read like one... but it certainly is NOT some sade pathetic story about some poor crippled kid whose been suffering for 53 years (her birthday is today...i'm posting your article on her facebook page as I know she'll love it!)
NOT all stories about people with disabilities are sad. Just like not all stories about the able-bodied are happy. I hope your book sells millions of copies...I plan to gift it to many!
NOT all stories about people with disabilities are sad. Just like not all stories about the able-bodied are happy. I hope your book sells millions of copies...I plan to gift it to many!
38
Thank you for choosing to share your perspective with us. Reading your words has shifted my view of the world. I suspect you have hit upon something not dissimilar to wisdom. :)
9
Inspirational on so many levels, Ms. Shang, and the writing was exquisite. Thank you for shining your light on us!
Peggy in NH
1911
Peggy in NH
1911
12
This is beautiful film just back from Cannes that strikes a similar chord.
https://vimeo.com/174385874
https://vimeo.com/174385874
4
And I would've loved a book likke this growing up with a learning disability. The problems I had as a kid, mostly bullies, have stayed with me, but I never lost hope about anything. And i am so glad you haven't lost anything. Keep writing, keep growing, and don't let anyone keep you down.
15
From one Sleepy American Hero to the Next, Melissa, you are a True Superhero, an inspiration to humanity around the world. The one historic fact which gives me chills... "The only US President in history to ever be elected 4 Terms not only was for Disability Rights... He WAS Us, FDR. Come Assemble with us in the Nap Cave where we can inspire the world over. If it not for my disability, I would have never become Sleepy American. Congratulations!
5
Whatever her disability, it certainly isn't academic. What a wonderful story by an eighth-grader! Good luck to Melissa!!
10
When does this girl find the time to be disabled?
14
Great piece Melissa! Please keep writing. And write what you want, don't fall for the line about needing conflict. We need writing with happy characters.
10
I completely agree. Books, television for children and teens has become very formulaic, almost always plotted on conflicts, problems or a specific unsavory character and how to defeat him/her. A fresh approach is welcome and well overdue!
8
Have. Have become. Aback.
Keep writing, Melissa! I want to see Mia Lee wheel through more adventures and into her own movie franchise or television show!
11
You go girl. I am going on Amazon to order your book for my Middle School granddaughter! Wish you went to the same school and good be buddies.
7
Melissa, I take your most salient point to be: respect me and treat me with the same courtesy you'd extend to anyone else--but DON'T pity me, because pity is a form of condescension. Right on, girl.
Off to Amazon to check out your book.
Off to Amazon to check out your book.
19
Melissa, you are awesome. That is all.
11
Bravo! This is a wonderfully fresh perspective, I am 76 years old, and have had much professional experience with people with emotional challenges. However, after reading this piece, I will look at people with disabilities in a new light. One is never too old to learn. Thank you.
15
you are a wise, brave soul Melissa!
7
One of my favorite books growing up was Mine for Keeps about a girl with cerebral palsy who helps a boy with rheumatic fever through training their pet dogs.
6
You go girl! CMT is also in my extended family. And guess what? Everybody here is also happy. I love your book, I applaud you for self-publishing, and I hope American Girl changes its mind.
13
My eighth-grade daughter and you share something in common-- a love of books. Now she is getting yours for her birthday, along with this essay. Congratulations on your accomplishments, and good luck in the future!
10
A wonderful essay by a very courageous girl. My son died of MD many years ago [1978]. I hope that the medical profession has made important strides in dealing with MD.
One of our greatest Presidents was in a wheel chair [FDR]. Maybe Melissa will follow in his path.
One of our greatest Presidents was in a wheel chair [FDR]. Maybe Melissa will follow in his path.
11
Fantastic, Melissa! And I see your book is selling very well; so much for agents and editors! I hope you make it into a series. Congratulations, and keep up the good work, both you and Eva.
10
Best. Essay. Ever. I hope you get elected President some day. I will vote for you if I'm still around.
15
You have a wonderful written voice, and I hope you write more novels about happy normal people who use wheelchairs or are differently abled.Thanks for writing the essay.
21
I will be ordering copies of your book for my local school libraries.
Alex Chee, a wonderful author, had his first book rejected 38 times (if my recollection is correct) as it did not fit into a specific niche that could be readily marketed. It ended up on the NYT best seller list and is an outstanding book. You should be encouraged, not discouraged, when you cannot easily be pigeon holed.
Alex Chee, a wonderful author, had his first book rejected 38 times (if my recollection is correct) as it did not fit into a specific niche that could be readily marketed. It ended up on the NYT best seller list and is an outstanding book. You should be encouraged, not discouraged, when you cannot easily be pigeon holed.
26
Fantastic, Melissa (and your sister, too!) - This is a great and timely reminder. In some ways, everyone has a handicap: things we can't do or don't do like others. As we get older, this gap of ability magnifies, but you know, life goes on! And there are so many nore fun things to concentrate on.
Good luck in your high school and college careers - keep your eyes open to all the other things that will make your life a happy one!
Good luck in your high school and college careers - keep your eyes open to all the other things that will make your life a happy one!
25
I love this. We were just at the Victory Games (multi-day sports competition for kids with disabilities) recently, and saw plenty of cheerful, even sassy middle schoolers on my son's school's team.
14
lovely story - I will buy a copy for my local library.
18
Great article! Very special kid!
10
But isn't her point that she's NOT special?
2
She is not special, but exceptional in self-awareness.
1
Well done! Thank you for articulating this.
While I don't agree with depicting disability in a "lighthearted way," I do think disability should be depicted as a normal part of life, and I would like to see more novels in which characters with disabilities do everyday things and aren't just an opportunity for "able-bodied protagonists to demonstrate kindness."
While I don't agree with depicting disability in a "lighthearted way," I do think disability should be depicted as a normal part of life, and I would like to see more novels in which characters with disabilities do everyday things and aren't just an opportunity for "able-bodied protagonists to demonstrate kindness."
11
I have Charcot-Marie-Tooth, too, though I am now just past 60 and not in a wheelchair. Mine was discovered at 13, and I underwent 7 operations at Children's Hospital in Boston between the ages of 13 and 21 to fuse bones in my foot, transfer tendons, and take out some joints. Of course, during those years, I was in casts and used crutches and, occasionally, a wheelchair. And you know what? I was a happy kid, too.
Each time before my hospital admission, Children's would send me a copy of "Curious George Goes to the Hospital" along with admission information. Maybe hospitals would be interested in providing your book, as well. Anyway, I loved that book, and would have loved yours, too. Congratulations!
Each time before my hospital admission, Children's would send me a copy of "Curious George Goes to the Hospital" along with admission information. Maybe hospitals would be interested in providing your book, as well. Anyway, I loved that book, and would have loved yours, too. Congratulations!
108
I'm not a fan of every story in this 'disability' series, but I love this one. Melissa articulates a point that adult disabled people have trouble getting out -- we're just people! Her reports on publishers' rejection letters was priceless. I'm buying her book now.
35
Published in the NY Times while still in middle school?
Disabled or not, that's absolutely amazing. Thank you for your story and keep on fighting for all of us! Remember to "enjoy every sandwich!"
Disabled or not, that's absolutely amazing. Thank you for your story and keep on fighting for all of us! Remember to "enjoy every sandwich!"
75
melissa, thank you.
i've always believed that we are ALL "disabled," one way or another.
it's just that for some of us it occurs in ways not as immediately identifiable. you certainly don't get my pity but you get loads of my respect.
i've always believed that we are ALL "disabled," one way or another.
it's just that for some of us it occurs in ways not as immediately identifiable. you certainly don't get my pity but you get loads of my respect.
3
An ordinary request written with extraordinary perspective and insight. I read Melissa's piece twice. Thank you for writing!
25
Melissa, thank you so much for providing a wonderful story. I wish you the very best and hope to see more of your writings.
15
Wow! What we could all learn from Melissa! I predict great things for her.
26
Melissa.
YAH!!!!! Good for you! I have a daughter who is blind and has a seemingly similar approach to life as you. She tells me how she doesn't like to hear how people think she's "inspirational", but that this is who she is. I think she's like "hey, I'm blind, but so what."
All the best to you!
YAH!!!!! Good for you! I have a daughter who is blind and has a seemingly similar approach to life as you. She tells me how she doesn't like to hear how people think she's "inspirational", but that this is who she is. I think she's like "hey, I'm blind, but so what."
All the best to you!
41
Melissa Shang, you and your sister are wise beyond your years. As a disabled adult who was not a disabled child, I too strive to show that I am similar to others and most often happy with my life. It was not always so, but it is now. Keep doing what you are doing. It's working.
34
I'm buying copies of your book, for the local library. More, please.
34
Melissa, you are a star. Great article, and great insights.
17
Right now you are a typical eighth grader, yes. The problems may come once you start to look for a job unless employer attitudes change towards handicapped people. Having said that I think that you will be in a good position to disprove any employer's doubts about your ability to do the job. And please write another book as you get older. It would be great to see how things go in high school or college.
14
A job, disability-accommodated housing, health insurance, money for what insurance does not cover, and adequate pain treatment when you are older and your symptoms are worse. My children and I have a painful genetic disability requiring multiple major surgeries throughout one's lifetime. We are all paradigms of creatively pushing through, but it is hard for working class and poor disabled to be optimistic given the current political climate. You never mention family or parental financial strain, but the reality is disabled juveniles often cannot go on play dates due to lack of even a wheelchair-ready vehicle (very expensive) , let alone wheelchair-accommodation on public transportation or where the play date is taking place. My son couldn't "spin the lock" either, but in his Title I public school that could not afford enough staff, all that meant was he could not have a locker. Classrooms were so full that a teacher tried to keep him out of her class because he was a fire hazard. I appreciate the positive and upbeat tone, but your next book might deal with the kinds of issues most disabled kids face in this world, and do everyone some good by actively working for fewer sad stories.
18
Maureen my comment did indeed take that into account. I have handicapped brother. He has autism. He's very high functioning but he still lives with my mother, he still doesn't make enough to live on his own but has too much to get any assistance from our government. I know quite well the issues disabled people face having experienced them first hand. Every one of those issues can be traced back to our country's unwillingness to spend any money on anything unless there is some profit involved or an immediate return.
My brother, like many other children and adults who were born with handicaps or had an illness or accident that left them handicapped, will not stop being handicapped. But I would like to hope that at some point in this country's history it will change.
My brother, like many other children and adults who were born with handicaps or had an illness or accident that left them handicapped, will not stop being handicapped. But I would like to hope that at some point in this country's history it will change.
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I think it is important to allow Melissa to have her own voice. The fact that she is disabled should not mean that she should limit herself to writing about disability.
I don't know what is typical for most disabled kids, but most of the ones I know are happy and have experienced success.
I don't know what is typical for most disabled kids, but most of the ones I know are happy and have experienced success.
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You go, girl!
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Kudos, Melissa!! All the very best to you!
Disability or disease affects different people differently, though. And a "happiness" needs to be mastered consciously often times.
While I wait for hours on an end for my turn at the Tata Memorial Hospital for cancer, I see pediatric patients skipping about, young adults frustrated but hopeful, and older people whining no end.
Maybe it has to do with "loss"--kids born into their conditions have never known anything else and cope better naturally. Adults who have been suddenly disrupted by the condition struggle harder to accept and move on.
Also depends on how much support you have... Kids' needs (financial, emotional etc.) are taken care of by parents. Adults have to find their own means.
Disability or disease affects different people differently, though. And a "happiness" needs to be mastered consciously often times.
While I wait for hours on an end for my turn at the Tata Memorial Hospital for cancer, I see pediatric patients skipping about, young adults frustrated but hopeful, and older people whining no end.
Maybe it has to do with "loss"--kids born into their conditions have never known anything else and cope better naturally. Adults who have been suddenly disrupted by the condition struggle harder to accept and move on.
Also depends on how much support you have... Kids' needs (financial, emotional etc.) are taken care of by parents. Adults have to find their own means.
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Rock-on Melissa. Please keep writing, please consider student government when you are in HS, and if you like it-- run for office as an adult. You have the vision and poise this country will need in the future!
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People who are temporarily able bodied seem to only focus on those of us with handicaps as having losses. Many of them seem to imagine what it would be like to have our handicaps and paint the worst possible picture. Thank you for trying to correct that. It's entirely possible to have a full, useful, and satisfying life with handicaps. And yes I use the word "handicapped" intentionally. The word means having an extra burden to overcome; it derives from horse racing handicapped weighting. it doesn't derive from begging. I consider it more appropriate than the word disabled which focuses on inability.
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Thank you for this excellent essay Melissa. As a person who also has a disability, and who also loves having fun and enjoying life, I know that my life is not sad. It can be hard, maybe a little harder than people without a disability, but like you, I feel that I live what most people would consider a relatively normal, enjoyable, and maybe even exciting life. I excel in my career (health care related--because I find myself drawn to health policy), I travel, and I do all of the other normal things people do (shop, binge watch shows on Netflix, hang out with my friends, etc). I don't want people to feel sad when they learn about my disability, because my life isn't sad at all. We do need more normal stories of people like us living our every day lives. Thanks for putting this story out there!
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Thank you Melissa, for your advocacy, which is necessary for a few reasons: teen and preteen literature can be positive and angst-free; people with "disabilities" don't need to be "fixed" or "healed" or pitied. Our society spends a lot of time, resources, and energy trying to make everyone "normal," thus creating the illusion that people who are disabled have something wrong with them that needs to be fixed. We are all individuals rather than genres.
This is a well-written and fabulous story.
This is a well-written and fabulous story.
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This is such an important essay, Melissa! Congratulations to you for writing it, and to your parents, who are raising such a tough, smart, cheerful kid. You have a great future as a writer! Keep up the good work.
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I just bought your book Melissa. Thank you for your beautiful essay; and best of luck with your budding career as a writer!
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Go for it young woman!! I enjoyed reading about your experiences!
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What a fantastic story! Thank you! This is an important reminder that a disability does not (have to) define anyone and points to why "people first" terminology is important (because words matter).
I had a friend with Type 1 Diabetes, a condition that needed constant monitoring and made her prone to other health issues. She was also fun-loving and active; and, while her disease was an important factor that she had to deal with, in no way did it define who she was as a person.
My husband has a cousin, on the other hand, who *is* a diabetic.
I had a friend with Type 1 Diabetes, a condition that needed constant monitoring and made her prone to other health issues. She was also fun-loving and active; and, while her disease was an important factor that she had to deal with, in no way did it define who she was as a person.
My husband has a cousin, on the other hand, who *is* a diabetic.
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Congratulations Melissa! Your perseverance will take you very far in life. Watch out world! Hear comes Melissa. Can't wait to read your book and all the ones that follow it.
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"Since its publication (="Mia Lee Is Wheeling Through Middle School”), I’ve gone back to being your average middle schooler."
Ms. Shang, you might be many things, but you are certainly not "average". Good luck to you and may you always find the happiness that you deserve.
Ms. Shang, you might be many things, but you are certainly not "average". Good luck to you and may you always find the happiness that you deserve.
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"I wanted young readers to think of disabled kids not as miserable people to be pitied, but as people living normal lives in spite of their challenges."
You're teaching people that disabled people are not "other", and that's so important, in these times especially. Well done - and I just ordered a copy to donate to my local library :)
You're teaching people that disabled people are not "other", and that's so important, in these times especially. Well done - and I just ordered a copy to donate to my local library :)
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Oh Melissa this was a well written essay, and it is no surprise to me that you are already an author at your age! Do not let the world and its cynicism make you hard. You just keep going. I see a future for both you and Mia and I look forward to reading more from you! Excellent work!
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I really enjoyed your article. I hope you will keep writing.
Perhaps your next book could include the same character and her adventures and challenges as she tries to educate others that she is actually happy.
Perhaps your next book could include the same character and her adventures and challenges as she tries to educate others that she is actually happy.
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Fantastic. Thank you.
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What an amazing young woman you must be! The writing in this essay is in itself very advanced for any middle school student, but also shows maturity beyond your years. Well done! Your determination is also remarkable. For every child and family who read your book, your influence widens considerable for they, in turn, touch others. Thank you.
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As someone with a disability myself who knows what it means to raise a very happy child with multiple disabilities, THANK YOU! Your work and voice is so important. But it's not just in books. And it is even worse in terms of people with "multi-minority status" like people of color with disabilities. On the show Born This Way on A&E we meet John Tucker, who is African American and has Down Syndrome, Cristina Sanz who is Latina and has Down Syndrome, and Elena who is half Japanese and has Down syndrome. These three terrific people are the ONLY people with disabilities of color to win an Emmy. The show is amazing. Yet people with disabilities almost never get on screen. Fully 1-in-5 people (56 million Americans) has a disability, yet according to GLAAD less than 2% of scripted TV are charectors with disabilities. And those are almost always white, and according to The Ruderman Family Foundation study, 96% of the time they are played by actors without disabilities. It is vital for audiences to see THEMSELVES in authentic ways. That is true in books, toys, TV, film and everything else. Thank you for what you are doing to change the narrative. "Change what they see. See how they change. " is the motto of a great photographer who is making these changes with photography. And I encourage you to get involved in the nonprofit RespectAbility which is working to change these narratives as well. YOU ARE AWESOME!
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Thank you for sharing your story and letting people know that kids are very adaptable and in general really good at finding happiness regardless of their circumstances. I too surprised people by how genuinely happy I was despite living with epilepsy. During school at a moment's notice I could suddenly without warning drop to the floor in full seizure mode. There was nothing I could do to stop it, medication didn't work so I just accepted it.
More importantly my fellow classmates accepted it also. My friends introduced me as their friend who liked to shake, rattle, and roll. I rode my bike, was a bookworm, participated in choir and was a happy kid despite my disability.
Being happy was a choice. I would have loved to have had a book that reflected that I wasn't unique and was actually pretty normal. You are wise beyond your years.
More importantly my fellow classmates accepted it also. My friends introduced me as their friend who liked to shake, rattle, and roll. I rode my bike, was a bookworm, participated in choir and was a happy kid despite my disability.
Being happy was a choice. I would have loved to have had a book that reflected that I wasn't unique and was actually pretty normal. You are wise beyond your years.
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As a mom of a boy who was born with joint deformities, I applaud you. My son was raised knowing that he is a great kid-with a few extra challenges. You live with what you are born with and you are right- happy is a choice.
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