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I'm going to go see. I have 30 extra points of IQ I don't really need, and medical lobotomies are not sanctioned.
1
This film looks about as funny as a dead puppy. This can only help lower the opinion of how others see the US, Mr Trump notwithstanding.
For those who believe in public executions, here are directions to the Paramount lot.....
1
Yuck. Sorry, but there you have it.
Between Donald Trump, Fox News and movies like "Baywatch", America is looking pretty ridiculous to the world.
5
In the annals of history, this will no doubt be near the top of America's intellectual contribution to the decline of sophistication, culture, art and civilization. That and the cure for erectile dysfunction as its highest priority.
6
"You shouldn't expect much in the way of cinema"
What a snarky comment.
I really believe that those who perceive a difference between movies and "cinema" already know which this is. And those who don't, could care less.
It is possible to have some meaningless fun once in a while, no?
What a snarky comment.
I really believe that those who perceive a difference between movies and "cinema" already know which this is. And those who don't, could care less.
It is possible to have some meaningless fun once in a while, no?
1
I just watched the trailer and saw nothing that made me want to watch the movie (which seems as unfunny as the Ghostbusters reboot). Dwayne Johnson deserves an Oscar for acting proud of this (because everyone, and I do mean everyone, should be feeling shame for thinking any of this is funny or entertaining). It's madness that they're already talking about a sequel.
1
Yes, nasty is what humor its all about in these sophisticated /"cutting edge" days we live in.
Dwayne has always been a likable, lightweight presence in the movies. I saw the trailer. Yes, he held up his end with the nasty remarks. Guess he needs his Peeps thinkin' he's got the street Cred... right Dwayne, you keep on a keepin' on. Ain't workin'.
Mr. Scott seems to think it's some of his best acting yet. Wow !
Dwayne has always been a likable, lightweight presence in the movies. I saw the trailer. Yes, he held up his end with the nasty remarks. Guess he needs his Peeps thinkin' he's got the street Cred... right Dwayne, you keep on a keepin' on. Ain't workin'.
Mr. Scott seems to think it's some of his best acting yet. Wow !
2
"Summer is there for Matt to ogle and flirt with, and to attest to the screenwriters’ utter inability to make a woman in a bathing suit an interesting character." THANK YOU for this sublime phrasing, Mr. Scott. If only your words could change the world a tiny bit, I'd be much relieved. Let's keep on keeping' on, gals, running through the surf and knowing what you're up against.
20
she's a lifeguard -- a cop in a bathing suit. How do you suggest she be made "interesting".?
Anyone confused or disoriented by A.O. Scott is welcome to visit Rotten Tomatoes, where there is no subtlety or ambivalence to trouble their minds.
20
Neal- yes,but isn't Rotten Tomatoes just a collection of various (and unknown) peoples opinions?
Rotten Tomatoes critics have it at 19%.
Paying customers have it at 72%
Paying customers have it at 72%
1
Hip-hop soundtrack? No "Baywatch" theme (music) even in passing?
Understand that Hoff makes an appearance at the end but is that enough?
Nada.
Understand that Hoff makes an appearance at the end but is that enough?
Nada.
1
Good review. I have a firm understanding of who will enjoy this movie (not me). And I now have enough information to fend off those people who will be raving about the movie (to each their own) and ask me why I haven't seen it yet.
4
Sam did you REALLY need the review to know you were skipping this movie?
And do you REALLY expect anyone to rave about it?
And do you REALLY expect anyone to rave about it?
1
I fear that everyone's favorite critic is being victimized by the ratio of bad films to good ones. 10 years ago, "Baywatch" wouldn't have even rated a review but since Scott recognizes that he has to produce something to validate his existence and that as much as he'd probably like to, he can't get away with hating everything, we are offered this "does he or doesn't he" review. C'mon A.O., put on your big boy Speedo. Tell us what you really think.
9
Mr. Scott, like my local critic Mick LaSalle of the SF Chronicle, and so many other major newspaper reviewers are from the Roger Ebert school of film criticism. A synopsis of plot, a few words about the acting and little else to show that the critic has any semblance of filmmaking knowledge which he/she wishes to provide the readers.
Pauline Kael, Andrew Sarris, and the other astute cinema critics of the 1960's would be turning over in their graves if they were able to witness the tripe served up by Scott and so many of his other colleagues at major journals. Even that Philistine Ebert would give two thumbs down to this rubbish, but then again, he popularized this school of detritus.
Pauline Kael, Andrew Sarris, and the other astute cinema critics of the 1960's would be turning over in their graves if they were able to witness the tripe served up by Scott and so many of his other colleagues at major journals. Even that Philistine Ebert would give two thumbs down to this rubbish, but then again, he popularized this school of detritus.
2
Meh!
It's the cinema version of the schlock tv show Baywatch.
Johnson has made a couple of movies I like (The Rundown, 2003) among them. But he's just a guy in the entertainment business...complaining about his movies is like complaining about the performance of a professional athlete. You're paying for a diversion.
It's the cinema version of the schlock tv show Baywatch.
Johnson has made a couple of movies I like (The Rundown, 2003) among them. But he's just a guy in the entertainment business...complaining about his movies is like complaining about the performance of a professional athlete. You're paying for a diversion.
And you had nothing else to do at 6:45 this morning than to attack Mr. Scott? Over a Baywatch review?!?! ...Perhaps you would've been better off going for an early morning run, or getting an early start to the farmers' market.
4
skin w/o porn !!
We should reward such, to reclaim, um, modesty
Mr Johnson is always a pleasure,
Was the original title babe-watch, shortened to bae-watch?
We should reward such, to reclaim, um, modesty
Mr Johnson is always a pleasure,
Was the original title babe-watch, shortened to bae-watch?
3
This is the most dull and perplexing review I've ever read. It's like he was paid to say he likes it, but hated it so much that his attempt at a positive review turned into some weirdly passive aggressive slew of unnecessarily complicated wording, trying to fill a word count.
3
Really? I thought it was a fun read on what sounds like a pretty dumb movie. You didn't enjoy this? "and wholesome, silly and earnest, dumb as a box of sand and slyly self-aware. It’s soft-serve ice cream. Crinkle-cut fries. A hot car and a skin rash. Tacky and phony and nasty and also kind of fun."
7
It's very hard to write intelligently and cogently about stupid things. I thought he did a good job with it.
13
Just have to say it never ceases to amaze me why people think a movie solely based off showing cleavage (which by the way is very demeaning and honestly just a cheap stand in for actual talent) and crass over the top jokes is a good idea and movie material is beyond me...Honestly if one likes this sort of thing it just shows one has horrible taste, no understanding of what actually makes a good movie, and obviously only care about looking at boobies etc...Seriously, I'm not a feminist, but am getting really tired of hollywood thinking the only way to sell movies is showing boobs and crouch. Whatever happened to self respect and morals?!
1
"Morality," Hollywood is not. And it doesn't have to be. There are other entertainment outlets for that.
1
All white?
3
This review is radical. Dude, go pound sand.
1
A.O....
You had me giggling and chuckling....never mind the naysayers. I mean how much more recommendy can you get with
"dumb as a box of sand" ( I am so going to use that :-)
"a hot car and a skin rash"
"multiple perspectives"
It was a fun review and not mean spirited. One imagines it would be only too easy to look down on such fare as it seems to be in the offering.
The film seems to be a full length movie version of a 90's pin up poster in a male juvenile's room...even that has a place.
Go or not...make up your own mind. That does not have to mean anything about you, or the movie in question. Why does anyone imagine it is the job of the critic is to 'recommend' or not a movie? Criticism is its own art. And A.O is as good as anyone in the field.
I still remember some of your criticisms that were far better art than the ones you were critiquing. The Clooney movie set in Hawaii...you described his running like a wingless bird...and it still gets me.The movie not so much.
You had me giggling and chuckling....never mind the naysayers. I mean how much more recommendy can you get with
"dumb as a box of sand" ( I am so going to use that :-)
"a hot car and a skin rash"
"multiple perspectives"
It was a fun review and not mean spirited. One imagines it would be only too easy to look down on such fare as it seems to be in the offering.
The film seems to be a full length movie version of a 90's pin up poster in a male juvenile's room...even that has a place.
Go or not...make up your own mind. That does not have to mean anything about you, or the movie in question. Why does anyone imagine it is the job of the critic is to 'recommend' or not a movie? Criticism is its own art. And A.O is as good as anyone in the field.
I still remember some of your criticisms that were far better art than the ones you were critiquing. The Clooney movie set in Hawaii...you described his running like a wingless bird...and it still gets me.The movie not so much.
8
Why are the girls - pardon me, women - allowed to wear bikini bottoms and the guys are not allowed to wear speedos?
I have had it with this rampant sexual discrimination!
I have had it with this rampant sexual discrimination!
11
Come on...how could he miss using the term "Babewatch" at least once? The original boob tube show was popular around the world, preying on one of the two motivators that make millions for media producers...sex and violence. He got that anatomy driven part right.
1
I get it, you're just riffing, but when is a 'hot car and a skin rash' 'kind of fun'? Also, the Rock is pretty good in Ballers on HBO.
2
Is it wrong that I really want to see this film? :)
10
john- which label do you want to be pilloried upon?
Personally, I rank "Joe Dirt" and "Dude Where's My Car" as comic masterpieces. Very few agree with me, that's fine with me.
Personally, I rank "Joe Dirt" and "Dude Where's My Car" as comic masterpieces. Very few agree with me, that's fine with me.
I once felt contempt for those who not only watched but loved this garbage. I derided their need for distraction. Now? Not so sure.
6
Perhaps the only review anyone will ever need about the original television version of Baywatch comes from "Friends." Joey was a fan but Chandler somehow had never seen the show. As the opening credits and theme song began, Chandler stared transfixed at the slow motion images of tan, fit male and female bodies in red swimsuits. And with a big smile on his face said, "They're running, they're actually running."
Joey nodded knowlingly, as Chandler eagerly took a seat beside him in front of the tv.
Joey nodded knowlingly, as Chandler eagerly took a seat beside him in front of the tv.
8
When you have to mention that the soundtrack is good you know you have a turkey on your hands.
2
All this talk of body parts! Is this a Frankenstein remake? Unfortunately, sounds like they won't be able to find a brain anywhere.
1
I'm not sure what "sleazy, yet wholesome" can mean. It's just a word salad.
8
Scott didn't like Pirates of the Caribbean, but he (sort of?) liked this?
1
When I read a movie review, I am not looking for the piece of information that indicates whether or not a reviewer liked the particular movie in question. That information is only useful to those who keep score, not individuals that go to movies.
What I am interested in is whether or not I will like the movie (or the restaurant, or the new car.) This review, without the outright indication of whether or not AOS liked the movie, is useful in all manners of that question: number of plot lines, amount of skin showing, number of evil drug dealers, the nature of the bathing suits. All important pieces of information.
What I am interested in is whether or not I will like the movie (or the restaurant, or the new car.) This review, without the outright indication of whether or not AOS liked the movie, is useful in all manners of that question: number of plot lines, amount of skin showing, number of evil drug dealers, the nature of the bathing suits. All important pieces of information.
2
I am a bit surprised by myself; I want to see this!
6
I don't know what's more enjoyable; the review, or reading the comments of the pretentious NYT readers. According to them, beautiful people can't possibly be intelligent, and if you enjoy this movie for a laugh, you can't be taken seriously as a film critic. Mr. Scott, I admire your courage, but do what all "serious" film critics do: pan movies of this nature even if you secretly got a laugh watching it.
19
I looked through the comments and I couldn't find what you were talking about in your comment i.e. "beautiful people can't possibly be intelligent". Did anyone actually say that?
1
This looks like a movie I might watch on a 767 redeye flight too old to have been equipped with WiFi...
1
I like "The Rock" even though he's not much of an actor and really comes from the comic book type characters that seem to be so prevalent in today's movies without any hint of acting skills or talent.
This is just another silly, juvenile movie and not worth even watching except to provide A.O. Scott with a excuse to write a boring review.
This is just another silly, juvenile movie and not worth even watching except to provide A.O. Scott with a excuse to write a boring review.
Every once in a while Mr. Scott raves about a movie that actually deserves such praise- "A Quiet Passion," for one. "A Woman's Life" for another. I tell other people to seek out those films not because of Mr. Scott's panegyrics but, rather, in spite of them. His review of "Baywatch" is a perfect example of this: no, it's not a rave, but it seems to me that anyone who can enjoy this sort of thing- mostly because of the quality of the anatomical parts on display- can't really be regarded as much of an authority on quality cinema.
14
Gotta offer a counterpunch. I love A.O. Scott's reviews because they are smart, imaginative and often playful and entertaining. Mr. Freeman seems to be demanding that all film reviewers stick to a thumbs up/thumbs down opinion brief. Why?
We filmgoers mostly know in advance what we want or don't want to see. I don't need a reviewer to tell me anything with Cynthia Nixon, yes; retreads of old tv shows, no. What I want from a review is enlightening commentary that will expand my appreciation for a good film. Over and over I find that in A.O. Scott's reviews. He is ALWAYS worth reading, no matter what the subject.
We filmgoers mostly know in advance what we want or don't want to see. I don't need a reviewer to tell me anything with Cynthia Nixon, yes; retreads of old tv shows, no. What I want from a review is enlightening commentary that will expand my appreciation for a good film. Over and over I find that in A.O. Scott's reviews. He is ALWAYS worth reading, no matter what the subject.
2
Those critics who can go to Cannes, do. Those that don't have to deal with the likes of this.
But in fairness to A.O., it sounds like he had more fun than Manohla did on her watch.
But in fairness to A.O., it sounds like he had more fun than Manohla did on her watch.
Unlike you?
** rolls eyes **
** rolls eyes **
3
When will NYT get a movie reviewer that offers some opinion to which we can relate, instead of always ending the review with me thinking, "Well, did he/she like it or not?" "Are you recommending it, or not?" "Can I relate to your review in any way, or not?" "Is the movie worth seeing, or not?"
This review seems mildly encouraging, light-hearted, possibly fun, but then ends with "You shouldn't expect much...except for the bodies...which is all you came for in the first place." If Mr. Scott is that confident that all I would go for is the bodies, then why not say from sentence one that this is all the movie has to offer? In which case, I wouldn't go see the movie but would also not waste my time reading a nebulous review.
This review seems mildly encouraging, light-hearted, possibly fun, but then ends with "You shouldn't expect much...except for the bodies...which is all you came for in the first place." If Mr. Scott is that confident that all I would go for is the bodies, then why not say from sentence one that this is all the movie has to offer? In which case, I wouldn't go see the movie but would also not waste my time reading a nebulous review.
27
I really don't understand this criticism of Scott's reviews. It sounds as though you're looking for a one-size-fits-all, thumbs up or down "review" so you can be told what to think and what to watch. In which case, you should definitely go see this movie.
5
When they recommend it, they add a small icon at the end with the mention "NYT Critic’s Pick". You can see it here for this movie: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/24/movies/buena-vista-social-club-adios-....
3
Perhaps you ought to visit that website that rates movies with tomatoes. I'm sure you won't be troubled by any wit, subtlety or ambivalence there.
"Baywatch" is a TV series in desperate need of a parody, not a cinematic retread. The filmmakers have dramatically limited their audience to only those who will take this sort of schlock seriously.
13
The parody exists, it was called 'Son of a beach' - Comedy Central I believe.
2
Koyote, you've got to watch "Son of the Beach" , an old WOR channel 9 show. A fantastic Baywatch parody....
2