The Trump voters and many Republicans have a mythological image of Trump so it is not surprising that he has one of himself. I was a New Yorker, I am about his same age and I have witnessed Trump his whole life. He has never had to conform to anything in his life. He has never worked for anyone, other than his father and doesn't have share holders or a board of directors.
The rough road of life usually rounds people off, they loose their deviant behaviors and sharp edged idiosyncrasies in order to coexist and survive. Trump's money has insulated him from the process of social evolution and his bizarre behaviors have consumed his personality. In any other circumstance he would be fired for being such a freak but the Republican party has anointed him King because he serves their purpose. Consequently the country will suffer the perversions of their useful sociopathic pet.
The rough road of life usually rounds people off, they loose their deviant behaviors and sharp edged idiosyncrasies in order to coexist and survive. Trump's money has insulated him from the process of social evolution and his bizarre behaviors have consumed his personality. In any other circumstance he would be fired for being such a freak but the Republican party has anointed him King because he serves their purpose. Consequently the country will suffer the perversions of their useful sociopathic pet.
108
I must dispute the Poodle moniker. Poodles are supposedly highly intelligent dogs, and it is impossible to conjure a greater insult to any self respecting canine than to compare him/her to our appalling miscreant masquerading as POTUS. NO - sad to say, Trump is definitely a human - and the vast majority of animals have far greater intelligence and emotional maturity than Don the con will ever have. As for Pence: well, he is best suited to walk the halls of a monastery, where he can rant and rave about women's sexuality without actually having the ability to gut our privacy and healthcare primacy. 2/4, 10:50 AM
Curb your dog! Woof!
19
What a great piece - Pence is probably lesser of the two evils. But he seems to be so far in the 1920s era and seems to have a permanent need to be pleasing the unruly Trump - May be he prays all the time for better days.
13
Um, it's President Bannon. Who cast these votes votes, anyway?
28
Trump vs Pence. Between a rock and a hard spot. Hopefully, at least most of the world realizes that Trump is a buffoon, while Pence has a superficial air of respectability. Maybe better a buffoon than someone who can pass as respectable.
22
Isn't Ms Collins so clever:" Donald Trump as a mere lap dog." The problem is she isn't original. The idea has already been used in another op-ed by Mr. Kristol: "The Russian Poodle" Of course she could have been clever about Russia but that also has been done by others in the NYT: "Donald Trump: Kremlin Employee of the Month" or "willing Russian tool." But borderline copy cat doesn't seem to be She gives us the answer at least for her, "It’s a lot of fun." Other than that, it has very little other value.
6
I call them Slimy and Mike Fence, but yours is lighter and more uplifting, thanks Gail.
8
Please retract the slander to the poodle. I have had spaniels, German short haired pointers, setters, Irish setters and standard poodles. Poodles can easily be house trained, are lovely companions and athletic enough to walk in the mountains with me. Please shift to porcupines, skunks, minks and the like.
30
We need to make sure we don't make the same mistake we made in the campaign and think that by making fun of 45, we would bring him down because his actions were so downright outrageous. He said, if you remember, he could shoot somebody on fifth avenue and still not lose a vote. Comedy might work to soothe our fears for a time, but we need to be serious about holding him accountable on every front. There should be a national effort, for instance, to get him to show us his tax returns. Therein lies the true 45, the Donald, who has bilked his way to the top. As for Pence, somebody help!!!!
47
To compare Trump to dogs is deeply insulting to dogs.
96
Painfully evident that while Pence is the dog walker, Bannon is the trainer. Sad & shameful days for our country, indeed.
42
I am so sad for the USA right now, that any humor is appreciated, to try and cheer me up. The only word that I can use to describe this bunch is unpredictable. Pence's Poodle or not, with this erratic behavior everyday coming out of the White House, how long can this go on before some truly retaliates. Bernie Sanders said that this confrontational manner will lead to a war. Instead of provoking our friends world wide and needlessly antagonizing our enemies, this group should have focused on jobs.
I am very disappointed that the new staff in the White House openly lie. The first series of executive orders seem to have been hastily written and not vetted by normal processes so they are moved through the system. The travel ban seems like they just came up with the list of countries ad hoc. Then this blundered attack in Yemen with the 10 year old video as proof was very amateurish. These executive orders will be in the court system for years.
The USA is a country with more light around her. We have the best standard of living in the World, except a few very small European Countries. I believe in justice and doing the right thing. The foundation of our government is substantiated evidence, furthered by argument. I truly love the USA. I am just heart sick.
And one last thought, if the USA really wanted to keep manufacturing jobs here, they could fine the companies if they leave. I don't think being publically shamed on Twitter is going to really work long-term.
I am very disappointed that the new staff in the White House openly lie. The first series of executive orders seem to have been hastily written and not vetted by normal processes so they are moved through the system. The travel ban seems like they just came up with the list of countries ad hoc. Then this blundered attack in Yemen with the 10 year old video as proof was very amateurish. These executive orders will be in the court system for years.
The USA is a country with more light around her. We have the best standard of living in the World, except a few very small European Countries. I believe in justice and doing the right thing. The foundation of our government is substantiated evidence, furthered by argument. I truly love the USA. I am just heart sick.
And one last thought, if the USA really wanted to keep manufacturing jobs here, they could fine the companies if they leave. I don't think being publically shamed on Twitter is going to really work long-term.
14
Pet poodle it is, although I've always considered poodles rather intelligent creatures, so it's not a perfect choice. I also worry about the impact of this column on the Kibbles company. If dog owners read that Trump is being fed Kibbles, the product could tank. Who would want their own pet being fed what Trump is being fed? Finally, the metaphor seems to break down when we begin talking about the poodle being on Pence's leash. Ain't no leash involved. Pence is just showing us all the tricks he's teaching Trump. Roll over on abortion. Speak on deregulation. Bannon's got him shaking hands on immigration. Good boy. Hmmmm, maybe the metaphor doesn't break down.
13
I suggest Bannon's Bowser.
28
Don't stop, Gail. Let's send free subscriptions to your columns to all Trump voters.
16
While I enjoyed the humor, I am concerned that doing this will drive Trump
ever deeper into the arms of Bannon and Flynn.
ever deeper into the arms of Bannon and Flynn.
8
Pence's Poodle has not only his master to answer to, but also his scruffy comrade in arms from the animal shelter, Pit Bull Bannon, and his dutiful house-trained Reince "Therapy Dog" Preibus who stands patiently with a draft of the next executive order to sign while the unruly Poodle finishes snarling at some imagined threat while the Crusader pulls on the choke chain.
It's amusing to picture how the "Unholy Trinity" around the Dumpster must take turns trying to manipulate him by pulling the levers and turning the knobs of his narcissistic personality disorder.
The Poodle Master looks so smug because he knows who takes the reins once his poodle is sent to the animal shelter.
It's amusing to picture how the "Unholy Trinity" around the Dumpster must take turns trying to manipulate him by pulling the levers and turning the knobs of his narcissistic personality disorder.
The Poodle Master looks so smug because he knows who takes the reins once his poodle is sent to the animal shelter.
28
I'd like to see Pence's Poodle strapped to the top of the Veep's car
44
Tell us how you really feel, Gail! Ha!
Pence worries me because he behaves well while committing the same crimes as Trump. Maybe he's a Spiro Agnew, but then we're stuck with Paul Ryan...we need to VOTE these chumps out in Nov 2018.
Pence worries me because he behaves well while committing the same crimes as Trump. Maybe he's a Spiro Agnew, but then we're stuck with Paul Ryan...we need to VOTE these chumps out in Nov 2018.
14
Expensive show dogs have entourages.
First, there is the owner, in this case that would be the Trump Organization; next, the trainer who tries to get the dog to learn his new tricks, clearly Svengali Bannon’s role; then a handler, hired to walk the dog in shows and prevent him from misbehaving in public, which is where Pence comes in. (Oops)
There is usually a groomer but no one seemed to think any grooming was necessary to be President of the United States so they went with the natural style.
First, there is the owner, in this case that would be the Trump Organization; next, the trainer who tries to get the dog to learn his new tricks, clearly Svengali Bannon’s role; then a handler, hired to walk the dog in shows and prevent him from misbehaving in public, which is where Pence comes in. (Oops)
There is usually a groomer but no one seemed to think any grooming was necessary to be President of the United States so they went with the natural style.
5
I'm with those who voted for "Pence's Pekingese"; so many of Trump's actions could then be attributed to "a fit of Peke".
Opportunity missed.
Opportunity missed.
8
trump is a disaster as anybody who thinks predicted when he won the election. however, i've said from the start that pence, who sounds like a snake oil salesman to me, probably would not be much, if any, of an improvement.
9
The tails are wagging the Trump. Pence and his Reich Fuhrer Storm Trooper SS Bannon are leading Trump by the Comb Over down the garden path. Trump with each week sinks deeper in the polls and the doo-doo that they do so well.
The tail that wags the Trump will not put up with being placed on top of the Trump Station Wagon and taking for a journey of hundreds of miles. No, it will be the Orange One who is strapped down on the roof and taken for a ride, with Trump the Insult Dog barfing on America all the way.
DD
Manhattan
The tail that wags the Trump will not put up with being placed on top of the Trump Station Wagon and taking for a journey of hundreds of miles. No, it will be the Orange One who is strapped down on the roof and taken for a ride, with Trump the Insult Dog barfing on America all the way.
DD
Manhattan
9
Betsy DeVos and Michael Pence are frightening, the best examples of Invasion of the Body Snatchers's 'pod people' I've ever seen, Pence coming from an Evangelical pod and DeVos's pod from some parallel universe inhabited by unhinged gazillionaires. They're both dangerous and will bring deep pivotal losses to our way of thinking. But Pence especially. He's a snake in the grass much like that creepy Ted Cruz. He's an especially devout Evangelical and make no doubt about was the reason he got picked to run with Trump. There's more going on here than that Trump stage act that's devouring the daily news cycle and I wish we'd hear more about it from our news media. From the moment puppet Trump penned the press during one of his rallies there was writing on the wall. And it was frightening. Please visit NPR's Fresh Air, Thursday, Feb. 2nd Program, 'Exploring the Nationalistic and Christian Right's Influences on Trump' with guest, Sarah Pozner interviwed by Terry Gross.
It's a 'must listen to.' You'll be straightened in your seat, believe me.
It's a 'must listen to.' You'll be straightened in your seat, believe me.
22
Too many priceless zingers to cite them all (please, Gail, I'm just having my coffee)...but the "rice and beans" thing, and "...our nation's forgotten financial consultants" are way, way up there. Literally LOL (sorry).
Gail Collins, Irony's Rottweiler, I heart thee.
Be my valentine.
Gail Collins, Irony's Rottweiler, I heart thee.
Be my valentine.
26
With rollback of all the financial protections invoked following the recession. Trump and co conspirators are trying to squeeze the last dollar out of the average person's IRA, eliminating every protection from these greedy Wall Street thieves. Her it comes again. Just when you thought you could retire. It's going to happen. Your job will be in jeopardy, your home, your future life.
13
Temperamental pets are often crate-trained. Maybe Pence could get a gilded one...?
While choke collars are frowned upon...what about those invisible fences collars...just a little shock when the tinted-in-chief wanders to far off.
Maybe Cesar Millan can do some extra-special and Bigly behavioral training out on the WH lawn...do an, "At the White House" special on Animal Planet.
While choke collars are frowned upon...what about those invisible fences collars...just a little shock when the tinted-in-chief wanders to far off.
Maybe Cesar Millan can do some extra-special and Bigly behavioral training out on the WH lawn...do an, "At the White House" special on Animal Planet.
13
The Poodle's "noodle has perhaps been permanently harmed by the drug he takes for "hair growth" (I just read about all its side effects!). Possibly being a lapdog is the result of this drug. Or not.
Nevertheless, "something" is responsible for all these terrible Poodle "picks."
One Poodle Pick has already resigned. Even before any confirmation vote.
I'm hoping this is just the beginning. And that soon we will learn that No-nothing, conflicts-of-interest Betsy DeVos will follow suit. She's already won the Prize of being the most disliked candidate for a cabinet EVER. And she should be content with that. If hair loss and a drug to reverse it have this many people upset, imagine the damage to children! She must RESIGN - because otherwise her life will be a living purgatory.
Ok, on to the Poodle's Lap. Pence begins to sound like a hagiographer. Someone who paints a mythical aura of sainthood. To hear Pence speak about his Poodle on the PBS Newshour this week was a lesson in how one can become so enamored of a Poodle as to practically fall down in worship, using hushed tones and awestruck vocabulary to paint a portrait of someone in ecstasy, able to channel the Holy Spirit and speak words worthy of Sainthood.
The Poodle is no Saint! And therefore Pence too has got to resign!
Nevertheless, "something" is responsible for all these terrible Poodle "picks."
One Poodle Pick has already resigned. Even before any confirmation vote.
I'm hoping this is just the beginning. And that soon we will learn that No-nothing, conflicts-of-interest Betsy DeVos will follow suit. She's already won the Prize of being the most disliked candidate for a cabinet EVER. And she should be content with that. If hair loss and a drug to reverse it have this many people upset, imagine the damage to children! She must RESIGN - because otherwise her life will be a living purgatory.
Ok, on to the Poodle's Lap. Pence begins to sound like a hagiographer. Someone who paints a mythical aura of sainthood. To hear Pence speak about his Poodle on the PBS Newshour this week was a lesson in how one can become so enamored of a Poodle as to practically fall down in worship, using hushed tones and awestruck vocabulary to paint a portrait of someone in ecstasy, able to channel the Holy Spirit and speak words worthy of Sainthood.
The Poodle is no Saint! And therefore Pence too has got to resign!
9
What does Gail have against dogs? Comparing any of the current administration to dogs does a major disservice to the dogs.
12
Wonderful thoughts, Gail, but let us please not forget that towering image of rectitude, Steve Bannon. He is the uh, theoretician that guides all of this behavior. Folks here might not think that it's particularly guided, but we can be assured that it's God's plan, as Franklin Graham and Jerry Falwell Jr. have there theological hands in all of this.
I think "The Apprentice" is mentioned somewhere in the Old Testament... just about everything else is that you want to justify, like DeVos's grand vision for educating our children.
This nonsense takes me back to the 1950's, not that I was there. I think my grandfather told me all about them. God was in control of our nation then, unlike today where we are a sad failure. But oddly, education was a lot better then with something called public schools. There was no Right Wing media and no "Apprentice". It was a bucolic time when we could send our military into various countries to ensure capitalism. Now, capitalism is global and our heartland friends have elected a global corporation as president who is a poodle, evidently.
I'd prefer an Alaskan Husky as president. They are devoted to the people whom they serve.
I think "The Apprentice" is mentioned somewhere in the Old Testament... just about everything else is that you want to justify, like DeVos's grand vision for educating our children.
This nonsense takes me back to the 1950's, not that I was there. I think my grandfather told me all about them. God was in control of our nation then, unlike today where we are a sad failure. But oddly, education was a lot better then with something called public schools. There was no Right Wing media and no "Apprentice". It was a bucolic time when we could send our military into various countries to ensure capitalism. Now, capitalism is global and our heartland friends have elected a global corporation as president who is a poodle, evidently.
I'd prefer an Alaskan Husky as president. They are devoted to the people whom they serve.
11
will pence tie his poodle to the top of his car when he visits canada?
6
If Republicans want ANY purchase, in the world of integrity and believability, they had better quickly find the votes to override the "nuclear option," for Betsy DeVos, if not for the rest of them, I see a "nuclear event" coming in 2018.
5
As always Gail, your column is very funny. You do some of your best work with dogs. I am thinking particularly of poor Seamus Romney. But here's the thing - poodles are smart. So your readers obviously chose the wrong breed this time. This tends to prove that the voters (even without Putin's help) sometimes get it wrong.
5
It is not all that clear to me that Pence owns the leash. I believe there is a constant struggle for the leash, and on a given day it might be Pence, but it could just as likely be Bannon, or Conway, or Putin. But if I had to choose between a Trump whose strings are pulled by man versus a Pence whose strings are pulled by God, I would have to go with the first...
6
I think the NYTimes having done little to no investigative journalism into Trumps Russian ties or his conflicts of interest (while certainly following the Clinton foundation) is now trying to show they see what is going on but I want actual reporting. We know he is an awful, dangerous President. What I don't know is who ordered the Trump flags onto the military convey through Kentucky. Somehow I don't see the Seals going rougue and doing that on their own. How about investigating that. That's something I need some help to see.
8
I distinctly recall Dick Cheney being "assigned" to W. Bush so there would be an adult in the room. Apparently, Mike Pence has been "assigned" to Trump for a similar reason.
However, in hindsight, the Bush presidency was a catastrophic failure with lethal consequences.
However, in hindsight, the Bush presidency was a catastrophic failure with lethal consequences.
10
Not sure where your wind is blowing Gail. Are you in favor of Vice President Pence serving as an anchor or storm sail for President Trump, or do you just want to whine?
Is Trump house trained? Perhaps we should put a doggy door in the West Wing? Or put down executive orders every where so we can protect the carpet.
13
Don't despair, America. There are about 4 million military and non-military federal employees with an average length of service of around 10 years. That's 40 million person-years of service. They work for you, and they take service fairly seriously (believe it or not), very often working for substantially less than private sector positions would offer (again, believe it or not). They will vet President Trumps appointees rather more rigorously than the Senate has. They will then help the competent, educate the ignorant, shunt the incompetent, and assist the truly malign to implode. It is the failsafe role of a bureaucracy--often what you don't want, but sometimes what you really, really need.
15
Conversely, in different contexts, illeism can be used to reinforce self-promotion, as used to sometimes comic effect by Bob Dole throughout his political career.[2] This was particularly made notable during the United States presidential election, 1996 and lampooned broadly in popular media for years afterwards.
Similarly illeism is used with an air of grandeur, to give the speaker lofty airs. Idiosyncratic and conceited people are known to either use or are lampooned as using illeism to puff themselves up or illustrate their egoism.
***********Wikipedia
I have never heard the word before so had to look it up and this is partly what I found that applies totally to Trump. There are other reasons that the third person us used, but none seemed to apply to Trump.
Now we know why he uses the third person in his talks.
Similarly illeism is used with an air of grandeur, to give the speaker lofty airs. Idiosyncratic and conceited people are known to either use or are lampooned as using illeism to puff themselves up or illustrate their egoism.
***********Wikipedia
I have never heard the word before so had to look it up and this is partly what I found that applies totally to Trump. There are other reasons that the third person us used, but none seemed to apply to Trump.
Now we know why he uses the third person in his talks.
2
pence looks like he has been constipated for months if not years. What a life following dump around. Remember Molly.
11
Remind me, again. All I see is Molly Pitcher firing the cannons to kick this Georgie Porgie out of our country!
1
Too late for president weasel?
Poodles are smart, cute, and cuddly.
Weasels ; not so much
Weasel suits this guy better
Poodles are smart, cute, and cuddly.
Weasels ; not so much
Weasel suits this guy better
9
The Wild Weasel is what the Europeans call the Honey Badger "Down Under." We also call our SAM seeking fighter jets Wild Weasels. They fly right into the face of danger and go for the balls. Everything is left in shambles but the Wild Weasel is typically unscathed as it can let off a stink even Pepe LePen can't tolerate.
2
"But what can I tell you? A vote is a vote."
Gail, let me introduce you to the GOP!
Gail, let me introduce you to the GOP!
3
Pence/Bannon? There are two dog handlers at work here. There is Pence and his poodle (actually I like Pomeranian better too, poodles are smarter but I will admit they look like fools when all dolled up for the Westminster Dog Show, can we enter Trump as a new dog breed?...no he has no measurements for dog greatness.) Pence and his poodle are working to blow up the country from the inside by working with the Republicans in congress. Bannon and his mutt are working to blow up the outer world. This is indeed a 'two dog night'. Will Trump voters ever wake to see the light? I doubt it. They are all too happy to be kept in the dark by the financial sector and who needs the Consumer Protection Agency, not me. I am perfectly satisfied with my pay day loans and I am happy to pay interest greater than the Mafia ever charged. But they won't break my knee caps or take away my healthcare, will they? Don't bet on it. Bet on the Super Bowl...the Patriots...there are some patriots left in this country, I think maybe, but not in the White House or in Congress.
6
First of all, I think the name Pence's Poodle is a slur on poodles everywhere. I'm not a fan of the breed but even they deserve better.
Next I think you need to be careful when poking fun at our illegitimate president. He has shown us over the past two years that he is not only mentally unstable but that he has a paper thin skin. He takes offensive at every little slight.
Now that he is officially the president, you could be looking at tax audits for the next four years.
Next I think you need to be careful when poking fun at our illegitimate president. He has shown us over the past two years that he is not only mentally unstable but that he has a paper thin skin. He takes offensive at every little slight.
Now that he is officially the president, you could be looking at tax audits for the next four years.
7
Pence is Trump's impeachment insurance, if not assassination insurance (which was how people referred to George HW Bush's VP choice (Dan Quayle, for those too young or too old to remember).
7
Pence' Poodle -- I like that. Even better might be Bannon's Boy. Then, we wouldn't be insulting dogs.
11
All of Trump's cabinet picks are designed to destroy the agencies they are to run. It is not incompetence or an accident. If you listen to that creep Bannon who shares the duty of walking the dog with Pence, you will understand that this is exactly the point.
18
Now that was funny!
4
Trump does not strike me as the type of man who would be the lapdog of anyone except for Putin. Pense and Bannon may be the dog-whisperers and may even attempt to pull his leash in one direction or another, but the executive decisions are Trump's and Trump's alone. Bush II could hide behind his attack dog, Cheney, and I would buy that because Bush was a weak, weak man. But Trump has been the Top Dog of his companies for far too long to give up that role, and like my own very stubborn dog, he wouldn't listen to anyone if he didn't want to.
3
Not to offend mixed breed dogs everywhere, but how about Pence's mutt?
9
A talking dog with a twitter account? I suggest a dog training collar with a very high setting for shock.
8
As a New Yorker, we do realize that the person holding the leash has to pick up after the dog with the doggie bag.
216
But the whole point of the GOP is that after they leave a mess, no one cleans up afterwards........until the next Democratic President is elected.
9
Sometimes the splat is too messy to be picked up...
5
"Trump with a Tail"? Actually, I think Trump's real "tale" lies in his tax returns.
We must continue to demand we see them, for that information might just set us free of this dreadful man.
We must continue to demand we see them, for that information might just set us free of this dreadful man.
3
No, it's Bannon pulling the leash, not Pence.
However, if McConnell screws up and gets Sessions confirmed as AG before the DeVos vote, DeVos will be finished as Sessions' seat will be vacant for the vote. In a 50/49 vote, Pence doesn't get to vote. As Al Gore succinctly put it "Whenever I vote, we win!"
If we actually had a vaguely competent President with even ONE partially-competent adviser (say, like Bush's Brain, Karl Rove), he would have quietly asked Betsy DeVos to gracefully step down and ask that her name be withdrawn. But not Trump. I'd bet at least half a dozen other Senators would LOVE to see DeVos gone, but do any of them have the guts? Does Toomey, or Rubio, or Tim Scott (who should, given his Clinton-like background of working-class poor)? Trump already detests McCain and Graham, so why don't either of them stand up?
Democrats can't change Republicans' opinions. They can simply replace them in voting booths. But Republicans can change Republicans' opinions and I'll bet Collins and Murkowski are trying to do just that.
However, if McConnell screws up and gets Sessions confirmed as AG before the DeVos vote, DeVos will be finished as Sessions' seat will be vacant for the vote. In a 50/49 vote, Pence doesn't get to vote. As Al Gore succinctly put it "Whenever I vote, we win!"
If we actually had a vaguely competent President with even ONE partially-competent adviser (say, like Bush's Brain, Karl Rove), he would have quietly asked Betsy DeVos to gracefully step down and ask that her name be withdrawn. But not Trump. I'd bet at least half a dozen other Senators would LOVE to see DeVos gone, but do any of them have the guts? Does Toomey, or Rubio, or Tim Scott (who should, given his Clinton-like background of working-class poor)? Trump already detests McCain and Graham, so why don't either of them stand up?
Democrats can't change Republicans' opinions. They can simply replace them in voting booths. But Republicans can change Republicans' opinions and I'll bet Collins and Murkowski are trying to do just that.
2
It's pretty clear that Pence and Bannon are running the show. Pence who looks like he was groomed for Westminster and Bannon who looks like a stray dog who has been eating out of garbage cans his entire life.
It all reminds me of the wonderful love story Lady and the Tramp.
It all reminds me of the wonderful love story Lady and the Tramp.
5
DeVos' fortune is built on the backs of millions of American who fell for the Greed, God and Grits pitch of the Amway "multi-tiered marketing"plan, otherwise know as a Ponzi scheme. Its no wonder she approaches education in the same way Amway distributors do their "business". They are told they don't need to know anything about business, marketing or sales, all that is required is that they just follow the plan.
Education wise, DeVos is simply following the hard right plan, vouchers charter schools and union busting with a heap of religion added for good measure. No thought required.
Education wise, DeVos is simply following the hard right plan, vouchers charter schools and union busting with a heap of religion added for good measure. No thought required.
7
I remember reading that one of the vice-presidential choices being interviewed said that during his meeting with Trump, Trump openly offered that the Vice President would be the one to actually run the government, while Trump bounced around staying in the public eye and having fun. Unfortunately Trump seems to be capable of doing more damage than any one man can repair. He's too good at it.
1
While i enjoy Gail's column and humor, this is really no laughing matter==Pence, as his actions as Indiana governor showed--is the new political leader of the Evangelical Taliban, exhorting tRump to break the separation of church and state that Jefferson and Madison espoused.....what that means is that Pence's idea of religious freedom means the evangelicals religion will trump yours
3
I can't keep the pet owners straight. Or does Trump just get passed around; one day he's Putin's pet, next day he's Pence's pet, next day he's Bannon's pet. Doesn't the poor guy ever get to bond with one owner?
2
Well Ms Collins, if your theory is true about the power of Pence then why is the left so hell bent on getting Trump out of office?
Looks to me like that would be much worse. Just like the left to not think it through.
Looks to me like that would be much worse. Just like the left to not think it through.
3
I demand a recount. Tony Blair was known Bush's Poodle. Its been done. Can't we go with a different type of dog? Also I don't think it's Pence at the end of the leash. Putin, Bannonn or whoever controls Baannon is much more likely.
3
Thanks, Gail. I went with "Pence's Pekingese" as it recalls the perception of Trump as a Manchurian candidate. Or, more accurately, the Moscovian candidate.
3
Since Trump is Pence's Poodle, can we further agree that he's anything but standard and call him Pence's Toy Poodle?
Now, if buyer's remorse were grounds for impeachment Toy Poodle would be in the doghouse by President's Day.
Now, if buyer's remorse were grounds for impeachment Toy Poodle would be in the doghouse by President's Day.
3
I kind of like Pence's Pug (short for pugnacious); having a whippet myself, I know my breed won't ever be defiled by being associated with Trump. Melania, maybe.
All that aside, Trump's cabinet choices are all poison meant to kill their departments (not Mattis or Kelly; Tillerson is yet to be seen). That DeVos and the nominee for Treasury and other financial positions have glaring financial conflicts is just the beginning. I live in Michigan and I can attest that the public school systems have suffered for her interference. What money can buy...a cabinet position!
Thank you for the wise female senators from Maine and Alaska who see that putting our children in DeVos' hands will give us a ruinous outcome.
Senators McCain and Graham, you've called out the mendacity and folly of this new administration--thank you both. Please be the one or two votes that will deny DeVos a seat where she is not qualified to be; don't let Pence be the one to grant her admission to the Cabinet.
All that aside, Trump's cabinet choices are all poison meant to kill their departments (not Mattis or Kelly; Tillerson is yet to be seen). That DeVos and the nominee for Treasury and other financial positions have glaring financial conflicts is just the beginning. I live in Michigan and I can attest that the public school systems have suffered for her interference. What money can buy...a cabinet position!
Thank you for the wise female senators from Maine and Alaska who see that putting our children in DeVos' hands will give us a ruinous outcome.
Senators McCain and Graham, you've called out the mendacity and folly of this new administration--thank you both. Please be the one or two votes that will deny DeVos a seat where she is not qualified to be; don't let Pence be the one to grant her admission to the Cabinet.
11
And while we're coming up with better names, let's start calling the Mexican wall Trump's Folly -- sounds better and big league accurate. Steve Bannon is Rasputin. Truth alternative Kellyanne Conway is the Propaganda Magician.
5
But poodles are so much smarter than Trump will ever be.
9
Mike Pence? He's the guy that thinks the Earth is 6,000 years old and that homosexuals should be sent to Straight Camp, right? That Mike Pence?
Ah, got it.
Ah, got it.
14
Don't you believe it. The confusion may all be cover for a number of sinister agenda items, most particularly something Bannon has long advocated: war with China and Islam—though how you might conduct the latter is not explained.
1
Prime Minister Justin Trudeau of Canada and the Trump team. A warning.
Collins describes the Trump team. Today’s Times has an article about the relationship Trudeau will take toward Pres. Trump. www.nytimes.com/2017/02/03/world/canada/canada-trudeau-trump.html
Remember the fate of UK Prime Minister Tony Blair. He decided to cooperate with Pres. Bush – it destroyed his career. He is now vilified in his own nation. He is no long on anyone’s political team.
Collins describes the Trump team. Today’s Times has an article about the relationship Trudeau will take toward Pres. Trump. www.nytimes.com/2017/02/03/world/canada/canada-trudeau-trump.html
Remember the fate of UK Prime Minister Tony Blair. He decided to cooperate with Pres. Bush – it destroyed his career. He is now vilified in his own nation. He is no long on anyone’s political team.
2
Gail, you have a way with dogs and are especially able to use stories about them to reveal essential truths about their powerful owners. Myself, I long for the days when a damning report about one of these dog owners was that he ferried his pet in a crate on top the family station wagon. Seems positively quaint in 2017. Pence rides his poodle around in Air Force One. Who says Republicans can't learn from their mistakes?
2
Reading the paper and watching news outlets each day, I get more and more depressed and deeply worried about what the Trump administration is doing to this country and to the world, for that matter. The only ray of sunshine in this whole debacle is that Gail, you have more than enough material to keep your readers smiling, at least for a few precious minutes each week.
7
Calling him Pence's Poodle reminds us of the episode in the TV comedy Frasier when his dad was demonstrating how smart his dog Eddie was by throwing a blanket over it and timing how long it took the dog to shake it off.
Somebody, please throw a blanket over Trump and let us all get out our egg timers to see if he's smarter than Eddie. Our money is on Eddie. Woof, woof.
Somebody, please throw a blanket over Trump and let us all get out our egg timers to see if he's smarter than Eddie. Our money is on Eddie. Woof, woof.
2
Maybe he can be entered into the Westminster Kennel Club Trials at Madison Square Garden next week. I'm sure he could win, "Best in Show".
1
If the Trump is really a caninesque creature, then it's time to call our beloved dog guy, the former, former Mitt.
Mitt will slap that sucker in a cage on top of one of his old, rattle-trap Caddies, and drive him to Canada or someplace cold.
Or alternatively, ride Mitt's car elevator, where there is no wifi, up and down to eternity and beyond. Trump could have an opinion on the way up and another on the way down. Perfect.
Mitt will slap that sucker in a cage on top of one of his old, rattle-trap Caddies, and drive him to Canada or someplace cold.
Or alternatively, ride Mitt's car elevator, where there is no wifi, up and down to eternity and beyond. Trump could have an opinion on the way up and another on the way down. Perfect.
1
Could someone convince Mitt Romney to put The Poodle on the top of his car, drive him to Canada and leave him there, perhaps in Labrador?
5
Very nice, but it seems he's successfully gotten you off the subject of being Putin's poodle and that's scary !!!
3
Poodle? We should be so lucky. Once you get past the high vocal register, they can be much warmer and form more secure friendships.
DeVos is Trump University for kids but with no way to sue for damages.
12
One of the most effective weapons against this foolish administration is the time-honored use of satire. The whole world is laughing at these clowns and, given their maniacal egos, it must really hurt. I also sense, given their brazen contempt for the Constitution, that the word "impeachment" is in the air.
9
This not satire. It is childishly poking with a stick a clearly established unpredictable and volatile person who unfortunately just happens to be the most powerful person, like it or not, on the planet. You call any man a poodle and he is very likely going to take action to demonstrate he is NOT a poodle - and everyone dive for cover.
Ms. Collins is not the court jester speaking truth to the king. She is a professional wiseass who makes a living giving NYTimes readers the giggles.
Does everyone feel better? I hope so, because laughing at his hair is not going to change a thing.
Ms. Collins is not the court jester speaking truth to the king. She is a professional wiseass who makes a living giving NYTimes readers the giggles.
Does everyone feel better? I hope so, because laughing at his hair is not going to change a thing.
1
We used to laugh at a presidential candidate's pet on the roof of his car. Now we have a president who is the pet on the roof. Not as funny.
12
Trump has Pence just like Dubya had Cheney (remember those two?).
3
Sorry, wrong name. Too cute. too much credit to pence.
Hereafter and henceforth the child shall be known as "It", capital "I" so as not to offend the office of the presidency.
"It". See how easily it rolls off the tongue. And note how descriptive "It" is of "It". "It's" mot a thing nor a person nor an objective, neither a goal nor a direction other than self-serving.
"It" it is.
Hereafter and henceforth the child shall be known as "It", capital "I" so as not to offend the office of the presidency.
"It". See how easily it rolls off the tongue. And note how descriptive "It" is of "It". "It's" mot a thing nor a person nor an objective, neither a goal nor a direction other than self-serving.
"It" it is.
2
My wife loves Pomeranians and would never forgive me if I went for that name. Anyway, 'poodle' suggests a wildly unnecessary and unnatural hairstyle and overall plasticity. Pomeranians are known for a strong streak of independence, which doesn't exactly describe trump. He'll chase any squirrel you point at, though he does of course have his favorite chew toys.
And honestly, Pence doesn't have enough class for a Pomeranian, which wouldn't go over big in the Midwest anyway. Poodle is pretentious enough, without crossing a line. So Pence's poodle it is!
And honestly, Pence doesn't have enough class for a Pomeranian, which wouldn't go over big in the Midwest anyway. Poodle is pretentious enough, without crossing a line. So Pence's poodle it is!
You might have heard that Arnold Schwarzenegger made a video clip suggesting they switch jobs so people can sleep better at night! Someone please start a petition for that. I bet it gets at least 2.9 million signatures!
PS: Gail, have you researched what's the most narcissistic breed?
PS: Gail, have you researched what's the most narcissistic breed?
2
Three things:
1) Trump said "hell" at the National Prayer Breakfast.
2) The evangelical Christians' embrace of a person who has five children by three women, two of whom he has divorced, and has bragged about countless affairs displays the pure hypocrisy of those people.
3) Bankers and hedge fund managers have not been living on rice and beans since the enactment of Dodd-Frank. I'm sorry, Ms. Collins, but I must label that an "alternative fact" or "fake news."
Sorry - four things - has anybody else noticed that the president hardly ever has persons of color around him? Look at the pictures of his meetings. It's remarkable.
1) Trump said "hell" at the National Prayer Breakfast.
2) The evangelical Christians' embrace of a person who has five children by three women, two of whom he has divorced, and has bragged about countless affairs displays the pure hypocrisy of those people.
3) Bankers and hedge fund managers have not been living on rice and beans since the enactment of Dodd-Frank. I'm sorry, Ms. Collins, but I must label that an "alternative fact" or "fake news."
Sorry - four things - has anybody else noticed that the president hardly ever has persons of color around him? Look at the pictures of his meetings. It's remarkable.
2
I like the pet dog symbolism. It makes me wish Mitt Romney would take the poodle, place him in a pet carrier, strap him to the roof of his car and drive him to Canada.
Apologies to Canada.
Apologies to Canada.
1
A late entry: Pence's Chihuahua, as in Chihuahua, Mexico.
No, no, no....
If we are going to pick a dog breed to attach to Trump, first and foremost it must be an American breed. Alliteration is cute, but irrelevant.
I would suggest the American Coon Hound as appropriate for Trump.
Need one say more?
If we are going to pick a dog breed to attach to Trump, first and foremost it must be an American breed. Alliteration is cute, but irrelevant.
I would suggest the American Coon Hound as appropriate for Trump.
Need one say more?
1
Where much of the DeVos money comes from -- the Amway pyramid scam. It has international sales in the billions, so that DeVos in the Cabinet could speak up on policies that would affect her family's business.
"In a column published in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram newspaper in August 1997,[75] reporter Molly Ivins wrote that Amway had "its own caucus in Congress...Five Republican House members are also Amway distributors: Reps. Sue Myrick of North Carolina, Jon Christensen of Nebraska, Dick Chrysler of Michigan, Richard Pombo of California, and John Ensign of Nevada. Their informal caucus meets several times a year with Amway bigwigs to discuss policy matters affecting the company, including China's trade status."[76]"
"In a column published in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram newspaper in August 1997,[75] reporter Molly Ivins wrote that Amway had "its own caucus in Congress...Five Republican House members are also Amway distributors: Reps. Sue Myrick of North Carolina, Jon Christensen of Nebraska, Dick Chrysler of Michigan, Richard Pombo of California, and John Ensign of Nevada. Their informal caucus meets several times a year with Amway bigwigs to discuss policy matters affecting the company, including China's trade status."[76]"
Gail, up to this time both many commenters, myself included, and Times writers have been using the puppet metaphor for Trump, usually with Bannon the Gepetto. Now you top that with the lap dog metaphor, lap dog with powder-puff tail.
If enough cartoonists get to work with these two ideas and can see to it that Trump cannot avoid seeing them we can bring him down. His telephone calls to Vlad and his tweets will deal with nothing but.
Only-NeverInSweden.blogspot.com
Dual citizen-US SE
If enough cartoonists get to work with these two ideas and can see to it that Trump cannot avoid seeing them we can bring him down. His telephone calls to Vlad and his tweets will deal with nothing but.
Only-NeverInSweden.blogspot.com
Dual citizen-US SE
2
Dear Gail Collins, I anticipate your columns with joy, but current US politics are so awful that comedy just doesn't work.
Writers have proposed that Trump is Bannon's dupe and Pence's puppy, but let's remember that this merciless, hollow, boastful man, Donald, has for years run a simple military operation, which he calls a real-estate business, staffed by a small coterie of Loyal Secretaries, kids from his first wife, and one terrifying butler. The key troops he's commanded are all hired lawyers, positioned to shoot down contractors seeking fair payment for their work and angry students who've been scammed by "Trump University."
Yes, Donald understands that well-organized evangelical Christians make up an important batallion in the Republican Party, but he doesn't admire Pence. Trump, a New Yorker, probably despises Pence, the Puritanical Hoosier (who calls his one and only wife "mother").
Donald Trump isn't as stupid and passive as liberals hope. He's accustomed to wielding a general's power and unashamed in attack.
At the same time, he is radically stupid. He thinks the United States is, at best, about as big as Times Square, and the rest of the world is all airports and reception rooms and golf courses.
He's in for a surprise. But it's going to take a long time before he realizes he's been surprised. And it may never happen.
He is both hollow and dense. And we are all in trouble. Not comic trouble. Serious trouble.
Writers have proposed that Trump is Bannon's dupe and Pence's puppy, but let's remember that this merciless, hollow, boastful man, Donald, has for years run a simple military operation, which he calls a real-estate business, staffed by a small coterie of Loyal Secretaries, kids from his first wife, and one terrifying butler. The key troops he's commanded are all hired lawyers, positioned to shoot down contractors seeking fair payment for their work and angry students who've been scammed by "Trump University."
Yes, Donald understands that well-organized evangelical Christians make up an important batallion in the Republican Party, but he doesn't admire Pence. Trump, a New Yorker, probably despises Pence, the Puritanical Hoosier (who calls his one and only wife "mother").
Donald Trump isn't as stupid and passive as liberals hope. He's accustomed to wielding a general's power and unashamed in attack.
At the same time, he is radically stupid. He thinks the United States is, at best, about as big as Times Square, and the rest of the world is all airports and reception rooms and golf courses.
He's in for a surprise. But it's going to take a long time before he realizes he's been surprised. And it may never happen.
He is both hollow and dense. And we are all in trouble. Not comic trouble. Serious trouble.
3
For some time now, I've been referring to Donald J. as "Little Don-Don". During the campaign, he was like Stinky on the old Abbott & Costello show - needling the other candidates verbally; I felt at any moment he was going to go up to one of them and do a hard, twisting pinch. When someone fought back, he took offense like a whiny little boy and said how that other person was not being nice.
Little Don-Don, just like some other low-esteem, bullying, young boys, needs to have everybody like him, and, for him, that means everyone in the entire world. Any possible competition is made fun of, because that's what mean little boys do.
Nuance in forethought? Having some forethought at all? Nope, that's too hard. Better to latch onto other bullies, especially if they complement him.
Pence/Bannion, or Bannion/Pence, keep Little Don-Don bouncing around and pointing him to their own priorities, and, because they give him their love and approval, he goes running off in that direction with no thought of what may result.
How long President Don-Don will keep on going this way is hard to tell. Perhaps we should all be sending the White House sugar-free big-sucker lollipops so that Little Don-Don has something to keep his hand and mouth occupied.
Little Don-Don, just like some other low-esteem, bullying, young boys, needs to have everybody like him, and, for him, that means everyone in the entire world. Any possible competition is made fun of, because that's what mean little boys do.
Nuance in forethought? Having some forethought at all? Nope, that's too hard. Better to latch onto other bullies, especially if they complement him.
Pence/Bannion, or Bannion/Pence, keep Little Don-Don bouncing around and pointing him to their own priorities, and, because they give him their love and approval, he goes running off in that direction with no thought of what may result.
How long President Don-Don will keep on going this way is hard to tell. Perhaps we should all be sending the White House sugar-free big-sucker lollipops so that Little Don-Don has something to keep his hand and mouth occupied.
I am disappointed. Pomeranians have the hair, and a loose consanguinity with the Trump. And the personality fits tighter with the Trump.
I think the relationship of Mr. Pense and Mr. Bannon needs further review. It will be of interest to see who pulls the strings in the future.
I think the relationship of Mr. Pense and Mr. Bannon needs further review. It will be of interest to see who pulls the strings in the future.
Americans have had two weeks of nothing but bad news and I don't see relief in sight. Where is the decent leadership that will start us back on the right path? Is there any to be found?
3
Between Pence and Bannon, Donnie (my nickname for him) has all Christian conservative and right-wing fanatical bases covered. Donnie just has to show up for the TV reality ahota and do the requisite tweeting. I do agree with the "watch what you wish for" concept that Donnie's disappearance and Pence's takeover would not be a cause for celebration. Pence is politically so much more savvy and polished in his presentation. At least we can count on Donnie to produce snickers, chuckles and outright worldwide shock waves; Pence is all serious business and very behind the scenes. Either way, Bannon will still be there promoting his own evil empire. No hope either way!
3
Gail, Thanks for your clever articles on the Groper-in-Chief. I recently discovered a word I'd never heard or read before, Googled it, and I think it might describe our scourge: FLAGRUM.
"You can fool all of the people some of the time, and you can fool some the people all of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time." ~~ attributed to President Abraham Lincoln
"You can fool all of the people some of the time, and you can fool some the people all of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time." ~~ attributed to President Abraham Lincoln
1
What a conglomeration! Observing Trump - and his no-balls Veep is like watching The Decline and Fall of the British Empire. Good Grief Charlie Brown! We have what looks like an accident before it happens. Your terrific summation: "We've got nominees who don't really know anything about the subject they will be overseeing". Led by a President who doesn't really know anything about the subjects of which he will be President. Sort of like Charlie Brown's football team. Though I do believe that Charlie understands football better than Trump understands national and international politics. Of course, that could save us in the long run. I never thought I would say this, by I do believe that George W. Bush understands our position in the world better than Donald Trump.
1
Yesterday afternoon, I was stuck in traffic in Palm Beach due to a detour around Mara Lago, the Trump mansion. This was my thinking as I was forced to leave this island paradise : The first weekend that President Trump can escape from the confines of Washington, D.C., he decides to spend his precious time at the fanciest house in Palm Beach with the Republican leadership and the biggest donors to the Republican party. Is this media guru loosing his touch? The new President of the forgotten working class. By the way, I was in front of the Trump estate because I was helping my Russian friend/ businessman/ mafia guy to find a good deal on an expensive hunting/fighting knife. But, first he wanted to take some pictures of the house where the famous Donald Trump lives. I think that he is a big supporter of our new president.
2
Anyone who grasps the absurdity of our 45th president should enjoy any metaphor or analogy which holds No. 45 up to the ridicule he so richly deserves.
Somehow, the image of a poodle on a leash held by the Empty Suit, Mike Pence, falls short. But, it’s not Pence’s fault.
The point of ridiculing someone in power is to damage that person’s ability to do bad things to people.
The idea of Donald Trump on the end of a leash held by a very mediocre subordinate works. A man with an over-sized ego abhors the notion that anyone can control him.
If, however, you choose to identify Trump with a cute, loveable creature like a poodle, Pomeranian or Pekinese, you defeat the purpose of the leash. You imbue a very nasty man with a positive quality. You make him cuddly and nice.
We need to go back to the drawing board with President Trump. The image we select cannot be ambivalent in its negative message. Maybe we should consider how, a few centuries ago, artists depicted The Seven Deadly Sins.
Somehow, the image of a poodle on a leash held by the Empty Suit, Mike Pence, falls short. But, it’s not Pence’s fault.
The point of ridiculing someone in power is to damage that person’s ability to do bad things to people.
The idea of Donald Trump on the end of a leash held by a very mediocre subordinate works. A man with an over-sized ego abhors the notion that anyone can control him.
If, however, you choose to identify Trump with a cute, loveable creature like a poodle, Pomeranian or Pekinese, you defeat the purpose of the leash. You imbue a very nasty man with a positive quality. You make him cuddly and nice.
We need to go back to the drawing board with President Trump. The image we select cannot be ambivalent in its negative message. Maybe we should consider how, a few centuries ago, artists depicted The Seven Deadly Sins.
6
@ SDW Cleveland - SDW I have collected the metaphors suggested so far by commenters and authors and have found four such. They are listed @
http://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/03/opinion/trump-with-a-tail.html?comment...
I suggest that the Times - or now that I think of it, better the New Yorker, call the cartoonists and give them the list - filling social media with these many versions of Trump would not change anything but if he were to see all of them he would have something to talk about the next time he talks with Vlad.
http://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/03/opinion/trump-with-a-tail.html?comment...
I suggest that the Times - or now that I think of it, better the New Yorker, call the cartoonists and give them the list - filling social media with these many versions of Trump would not change anything but if he were to see all of them he would have something to talk about the next time he talks with Vlad.
1
Larry Lundgren, you are definitely on the right track. Good job. As far as any Trump conversation with Vlad, I suspect that our new President listens, while Vlad does all of the talking.
Ayatollah Pence is as bad as Pasha Trump. I don't understand why they hate Islam so much. Some manifestations of Islam are perfect for them. Judaism is not. Even the orthodox variety demands modesty. It demands reading and self reflection. With Christianity , besides abortion rights, they have nothing to do. Nothing at all.
6
Pence's poodle, I like it. I privately voted for Bannon's Bichon Frise, because no one can argue that he's not a bit of a dandy, and Bannon's got his fingerprints all over those executive orders. My hit is that Mr. Poodle-Bichon Frise actually spends his days napping, snacking, watching tv, doing his hair, and making some boo-boos. Meanwhile the republican crew tries not to let his mess disturb their hasty and rather gleeful dismantling of democracy. Ruff!
5
He can be Pence's poodle, Bannon's Bichon Frise and Putin's Doberman. Wasn't it a Doberman Putin brought to a meeting with Merkel knowing she was terrified of big dogs? And these are the people funning major countries right now. Pretty disturbing and about the only thing we can do is ridicule Trump because that is what gets to him the most, that and having his tacky self sidelined forever by elites.
1
Don't know why, but I'm okay with the late night show guys having a blast ridiculing Trump. But when it comes to the NYT, it just seems like you're having too much fun Gayle. If somebody had written this column about Hitler when he was on the rise, would it have been funny? No. I understand about gallows humor and all that, but really this is a major catastrophe of worldwide proportion. If this ends really, really bad, and it just well might, you're going to look back at this column and cringe.
6
Completely agree! Making fun of Trump is what got him elected and now we have this huge mess! The Der Spiegel cover was right on, the country is in deep doodoo and it has only been 2 weeks.
2
AMEN TO THAT! I enjoy Gail's columns and her wiseass writing style ...but you are right...this is NO LAUGHING MATTER. What we are witnessing is a debacle of unpresidented(sic) proportions. Laughter is a good remedy for the sleepless nights this creature is causing so I guess I can live with Trevor's and Stephen's and Samantha's wisecrackers before bed...but I BEGIN most days with NYT. The world is in peril.
1
As the owner of three poodles (two Standard, one Miniature), I can assure you that the poodle is no wimpy pet. They're strong and athletic, with razor-sharp teeth and quick minds -- and they can also be disobedient, riotous brutes. Highly intelligent, they're great companions and totally independent.
To call Trump Pence's poodle is an insult to poodles everywhere.
To call Trump Pence's poodle is an insult to poodles everywhere.
9
Gail I adore your laugh out loud column, and poodles are inherently funny.
I felt the clutch in my chest, that ha ha ouch, when I first read this though.
The Poodle must be impaeached before he chews through all the furniture and overturns the gas can in the house.
The voters must not be afraid of Pence in order to get through the first impeachment. The voters need to realize that the Psychopathic Poodle's leash is held by Pence the Pomeranian, the Nasty Little Pomeranian.
So you get your dog too!
I felt the clutch in my chest, that ha ha ouch, when I first read this though.
The Poodle must be impaeached before he chews through all the furniture and overturns the gas can in the house.
The voters must not be afraid of Pence in order to get through the first impeachment. The voters need to realize that the Psychopathic Poodle's leash is held by Pence the Pomeranian, the Nasty Little Pomeranian.
So you get your dog too!
1
Why would the people's representative Ann Wagner, 2nd District in MO, think requiring an investment professional being required to have their clients best interest in their advice vs what is most profitable for themselves is a bad idea. It's like allowing a doctor to recommend what pays them more in insurance benefits vs what is best for their patients.
https://wagner.house.gov/media-center/press-releases/wagner-applauds-adm...
https://wagner.house.gov/media-center/press-releases/wagner-applauds-adm...
5
Her constitutuents should start calling to ask. If she is like my representative, you won't get a substantive answer. The best answer to your question is likely - follow the money and donor trail.
1
Gail's column illustrates well how there is nothing to laugh about. Resistance is the only response. Get active. Resist.
4
Trumppence
Thrumppence
Thruppence
Aha, we have a threepenny administration!
Thrumppence
Thruppence
Aha, we have a threepenny administration!
3
Now if only Pence will tie down his Poodle on top of his car and take a trip to some far distant place for doggie disposal.
Then we all can breathe easier and start on our own program to make the "greatness" of America our one and only goal - without any crazy input from the Poodle kept in its place .......... wherever.
Then we all can breathe easier and start on our own program to make the "greatness" of America our one and only goal - without any crazy input from the Poodle kept in its place .......... wherever.
3
It should have been Pence's pit bull rather than a poodle.
And it is't just Pence who is running the government. It is also Bannon. Trump only holds the pen.
And it is't just Pence who is running the government. It is also Bannon. Trump only holds the pen.
1
Gail I'm so glad you found your sense of humor. After the insanity that has been the first few weeks of Trump's presidency it feels good to laugh. Although poodles are highly intelligent so I don't think Trump will live up to the name.
We could amuse ourselves by sending kibble to the whitehouse addressed to Pence's poodle. Personally I'm planning on making a donation to my local ASPCA in the name of Pence's poodle and asking that they send an acknowledgement to the whitehouse. How can anyone pass up helping abused animals and irritating Trump at the same time.
The highlight of the past few weeks has been an awareness of just how much was done to protect us from the financial industry after the 2008 recession. At the time so many of us were in survival mode that we failed to appreciate just how much president Obama and Congress did to make sure that such a crisis didn't happen again. Fiduciaries and the CFBP were two of the greatest things to come out of the financial meltdown.
We may not win every battle but keep us informed so we can continue to call our elected officials anytime they fall in line behind the Trump/Pence/Bannon plan to take America back to the dark ages. Knowledge is power.
We could amuse ourselves by sending kibble to the whitehouse addressed to Pence's poodle. Personally I'm planning on making a donation to my local ASPCA in the name of Pence's poodle and asking that they send an acknowledgement to the whitehouse. How can anyone pass up helping abused animals and irritating Trump at the same time.
The highlight of the past few weeks has been an awareness of just how much was done to protect us from the financial industry after the 2008 recession. At the time so many of us were in survival mode that we failed to appreciate just how much president Obama and Congress did to make sure that such a crisis didn't happen again. Fiduciaries and the CFBP were two of the greatest things to come out of the financial meltdown.
We may not win every battle but keep us informed so we can continue to call our elected officials anytime they fall in line behind the Trump/Pence/Bannon plan to take America back to the dark ages. Knowledge is power.
1
Pence has perfected the furrowed forehead, smarmy gaze and practiced silken voice oozing fake concern for all things American. It's sickening. He's like a doctor holding your hand at hospital bedside and telling you, with concentrated compassion and utmost empathy, that you have 6 months to live. If that. How should we spend it, America?
How is it that Americans do not remember what happened just 8 years ago? Uncontrollable, rampant corporate greed, leading to the Great Recession? Why do Trump supporters think Dodd-Frank was enacted in the first place? Isn't this recent enough to be in everyone's memory banks?
People: if you elect a racist, bigoted, hating dolt, a fool with staggering ignorance and zero government experience, who now appears to be a vessel for the immigrant-hating, diversity-hating, America values-hating Bannon and his acolytes, a man with little affect control, who lives for petty innuendo and nastiness, a man who actually taunts and name-calls through Twitter even after his election to the highest office of the land, a man who insults the office he was honored to have been given: what you get is that same man, now in a position to ruin lives, exert his sadism and obvious cruelty, lash out with inept and injudicious orders, the desperate and needy be damned, and take down our cherished American values, all in the name of President.
If you elect a donkey candidate, you get a donkey president.
How is it that Americans do not remember what happened just 8 years ago? Uncontrollable, rampant corporate greed, leading to the Great Recession? Why do Trump supporters think Dodd-Frank was enacted in the first place? Isn't this recent enough to be in everyone's memory banks?
People: if you elect a racist, bigoted, hating dolt, a fool with staggering ignorance and zero government experience, who now appears to be a vessel for the immigrant-hating, diversity-hating, America values-hating Bannon and his acolytes, a man with little affect control, who lives for petty innuendo and nastiness, a man who actually taunts and name-calls through Twitter even after his election to the highest office of the land, a man who insults the office he was honored to have been given: what you get is that same man, now in a position to ruin lives, exert his sadism and obvious cruelty, lash out with inept and injudicious orders, the desperate and needy be damned, and take down our cherished American values, all in the name of President.
If you elect a donkey candidate, you get a donkey president.
7
As Mike Pence would surely tell you, dog spelled backwards, is god.
4
Gail, you're being unfair. Pence isn't the only one who brings the spoiled tantrum-thrower to heel. Let's give trainer Steve Bannon his due as well. The Donald has Two Daddies!
www.newyorkgritty.net
www.newyorkgritty.net
5
Ms. DeVos and her husband, Richard DeVos Jr., are major financial backers of Neurocore, a Michigan company that operates drug-free “brain performance centers” that claim to have worked with 10,000 children and adults to overcome problems with attention deficit disorder, autism, sleeplessness and stress. Neurocore claims it has cured 76% of the children it has treated for ADHD - at a cost of $2,000. I have a child with a mild form of autism, and would gladly have paid $2,000 or more if he could have been cured. But Nuerocore has provided NO proof of its claims. Neurocore also promotes "healthy diets". The diets to appear to be healthy, but Neurocore claims their healthy diets will cure a variety of emotional and mental problems.
While DeVos has promised to divest herself of many of her investments, she and her husband intend to keep their investment ( estimated at between $5 and $25 million) in Neurocore.
Additionally, the millionaire DeVos couple have made significant financial contributions to the campaigns of most Republican Senators.
Of all of President Trump's cabinet nominees, I think the DeVost nomination is the very worst. (Yes, there are other very bad nominees - Priutt for EPA and Price for HHS at the top of my bad nominee list.)
While DeVos has promised to divest herself of many of her investments, she and her husband intend to keep their investment ( estimated at between $5 and $25 million) in Neurocore.
Additionally, the millionaire DeVos couple have made significant financial contributions to the campaigns of most Republican Senators.
Of all of President Trump's cabinet nominees, I think the DeVost nomination is the very worst. (Yes, there are other very bad nominees - Priutt for EPA and Price for HHS at the top of my bad nominee list.)
9
Betsy DeVos is beyond understanding, and will be a blight on the public education system in the country. Shame on you trump et al. Any candidate for anything is sure to be the worst possible choice. Now THAT takes some kind of talent I guess.
3
Oh my, where to start?
Pence is a smooth talking spin master, the darling of fundamentalist and right wing religious groups.
He of course fits the GOP ideal of an anti regulation idealist, devoted to those who do not have much and never will, but are convinced that with a little prodding, the nabobs of finance and industry will provide them with well paying low skill jobs. He tells them what they want to hear. Reality is what they want it to be, and failure to produce will be the fault of those educated lazy liberals, the gospel according to Breitbart.
Pence will give them an alternate reality, just as K Conway gives us alternate facts and events. Trump's lies and prevarications are so obvious it is laughable, except to his fans, most of whom seem to never have know fact from fiction. Pence is as good as any televangelist preacher, bringing in the sheep. How does that hymn go, Bringing in the sheep, bringing in the sheep, we will be rejoicing bringing in the sheep.
So we have the making of the Fourth Reich, Pence, Conway, Bannon, Spicer. What a line up, this is the GOP ideal core leadership. A demagogue front man, Trump, and his propaganda ministry.
Right wing religious followers have the lowest median income of any religious groups, but consider themselves economically smart, the call it common sense. A recent study found that two out of three of them could not produce $1K in an emergency, yet they are voting to revive the economy of the country.
Pence is a smooth talking spin master, the darling of fundamentalist and right wing religious groups.
He of course fits the GOP ideal of an anti regulation idealist, devoted to those who do not have much and never will, but are convinced that with a little prodding, the nabobs of finance and industry will provide them with well paying low skill jobs. He tells them what they want to hear. Reality is what they want it to be, and failure to produce will be the fault of those educated lazy liberals, the gospel according to Breitbart.
Pence will give them an alternate reality, just as K Conway gives us alternate facts and events. Trump's lies and prevarications are so obvious it is laughable, except to his fans, most of whom seem to never have know fact from fiction. Pence is as good as any televangelist preacher, bringing in the sheep. How does that hymn go, Bringing in the sheep, bringing in the sheep, we will be rejoicing bringing in the sheep.
So we have the making of the Fourth Reich, Pence, Conway, Bannon, Spicer. What a line up, this is the GOP ideal core leadership. A demagogue front man, Trump, and his propaganda ministry.
Right wing religious followers have the lowest median income of any religious groups, but consider themselves economically smart, the call it common sense. A recent study found that two out of three of them could not produce $1K in an emergency, yet they are voting to revive the economy of the country.
3
Can I please wake up in a Kansas farmhouse after a bump in the head and realize that the whole thing was a bad dream? Please???
11
With Kobach churning up enough immigrant bashing dust to cover Arizona in SB 1070 shame? You might want to consider another setting. Alice doesn't even want to live in England anymore.
However, we got that silly AZ Senate President for hand carrying another state's dictates into our territory with a rip roaring recall. Caught him double dipping his chips in the Fiesta Bowl. That's unpardonable, pardner.
However, we got that silly AZ Senate President for hand carrying another state's dictates into our territory with a rip roaring recall. Caught him double dipping his chips in the Fiesta Bowl. That's unpardonable, pardner.
Politicians have so entrenched themselves with their own 1st class healthcare and pensions and virtual life-tenure and graft that fully 50% of people were willing to destroy the country to rip the system all apart. What they failed to grasp was they gave it to the R's who are as corrupt and grasping as the D's. There will be no true change, but we are a step closer to serious danger. Mr. Pence is like Cheney on steroids.
1
Pence or DeVos are not the ones we have to worry about if our main aim is to conserve our democracy. It's Steve Bannon, Trump's Svengali. Bannon is a Leninist who wants to do in our government entirely (see Daily Beast). He co-edited the 'Ban' with Trump and, unless we find a way to prevent it, will be sitting as permanent member on the National Security Council which makes decisions of war and peace. This is the guy that could bring down our democracy. We may not like Pence's politics and Betsy DeVos may not be capable of running the Department of Education, but at least with them we get to keep things like the freedom of the Press and freedom of speech and assembly. In other words, they are small change compared to Bannon. Keep you eye on the ball.
5
Great one, Gail!
I was thinking of "Pence's Chihuahua" as they are feisty canines; however, what did Chihuahua's ever do to warrant such a low blow? Trump's got a tail alright but it clearly is a forked one.
That's right, President D, call me out with a Tweet right after you've tweeted one of your speechwriter's yuge crafted comebacks to Governor Schwarzenegger. Who cares about the bigger issues of the day? Right? Exactly.
I was thinking of "Pence's Chihuahua" as they are feisty canines; however, what did Chihuahua's ever do to warrant such a low blow? Trump's got a tail alright but it clearly is a forked one.
That's right, President D, call me out with a Tweet right after you've tweeted one of your speechwriter's yuge crafted comebacks to Governor Schwarzenegger. Who cares about the bigger issues of the day? Right? Exactly.
2
Unless another senator has the balls these two women senators have, Pence will certainly make history. Then, but we have said this so many times since the last presidential campaign started. heaven help us. But in real life, all dogs, not ever poodles, go to heaven.
1
Mr. Trump's narcissism is business as usual for the power grabbers waiting in the wings.
You see it real time as Mr. Pence and others stand behind, applauding as he signs those ridiculously large executive orders with his absurdly over-sized signature.
Laughable, pathetic, and scary---all rolled into whatever this unsettling sense that any sane person derives from a daily repetition of pretense and theater.
But so much riding on it for the nation.
It is Bizarro World, and worse.
Reminiscent, perhaps of Groundhog Day, the movie. The same each day.
Shallow showmanship reinforced with ample praise by power-minded lurkers surrounding him. Who likely know he is destined to be dethroned.
Something the lurking Steve Bannon said this past week was rather striking: "Trump is a blunt instrument for us," said Bannon to Vanity Fair, "I don't know whether he really gets it or not."
Well, we citizens get it. This is a disaster.
You see it real time as Mr. Pence and others stand behind, applauding as he signs those ridiculously large executive orders with his absurdly over-sized signature.
Laughable, pathetic, and scary---all rolled into whatever this unsettling sense that any sane person derives from a daily repetition of pretense and theater.
But so much riding on it for the nation.
It is Bizarro World, and worse.
Reminiscent, perhaps of Groundhog Day, the movie. The same each day.
Shallow showmanship reinforced with ample praise by power-minded lurkers surrounding him. Who likely know he is destined to be dethroned.
Something the lurking Steve Bannon said this past week was rather striking: "Trump is a blunt instrument for us," said Bannon to Vanity Fair, "I don't know whether he really gets it or not."
Well, we citizens get it. This is a disaster.
5
Oh my where to start?
Pence is a smooth talking spin master with an evangelical following.
While Trump goes on with his bombastic threats to our previous allies, using the language of his followers, pence smoothly slips the knife in their ribs.
He males all the these executive orders sound reasonable, he is the GOP darling, an ideologue they can unite behind. He and Trump remind me of Bern's Transnational Analysis, the Trump voters get their strokes from them, they hear what they want to hear.
The general analysis of these followers is low skills, and bottom third median income. They Consider themselves as being financially savvy, despite a recent study showing two out of three could not provide $1k in an emergency, but they have what they call, common sense. They believe the GOP Nabobs are just waiting for all those pesky regulations to go away, and poof, well paying low skill jobs will suddenly appear.
While Bannon is the power behind the throne, Pence is the spokesman for it, along with the propaganda ministers, Conway and Spicer. Just offer an alternative reality to these slavish followers, and your seat of power is assured, that is until the economy suddenly does not follow your rules.
So hang on to your wallets folks, there is a cable of purloiners just waiting for you to hand it over.
Pence is a smooth talking spin master with an evangelical following.
While Trump goes on with his bombastic threats to our previous allies, using the language of his followers, pence smoothly slips the knife in their ribs.
He males all the these executive orders sound reasonable, he is the GOP darling, an ideologue they can unite behind. He and Trump remind me of Bern's Transnational Analysis, the Trump voters get their strokes from them, they hear what they want to hear.
The general analysis of these followers is low skills, and bottom third median income. They Consider themselves as being financially savvy, despite a recent study showing two out of three could not provide $1k in an emergency, but they have what they call, common sense. They believe the GOP Nabobs are just waiting for all those pesky regulations to go away, and poof, well paying low skill jobs will suddenly appear.
While Bannon is the power behind the throne, Pence is the spokesman for it, along with the propaganda ministers, Conway and Spicer. Just offer an alternative reality to these slavish followers, and your seat of power is assured, that is until the economy suddenly does not follow your rules.
So hang on to your wallets folks, there is a cable of purloiners just waiting for you to hand it over.
2
"...she's a billionaire whose money is in a bewildering stack of holding companies."
Well, not ALL of her money. Quite a bit of her money is in the "campaign" accounts of more than 20 of the republican Senators who will be voting on her confirmation.
No corruption there, folks.......
Well, not ALL of her money. Quite a bit of her money is in the "campaign" accounts of more than 20 of the republican Senators who will be voting on her confirmation.
No corruption there, folks.......
18
"According to the Center for Public Integrity, in a 1997 op-ed DeVos wrote for the Capitol Hill newspaper Roll Call, she defended her family's political contributions. "My family is the largest single contributor of soft money to the national Republican Party … I have decided, however, to stop taking offense at the suggestion that we are buying influence," the piece reads. "Now, I simply concede the point. We expect to foster a conservative governing philosophy consisting of limited government and respect for traditional American virtues. We expect a return on our investment; we expect a good and honest government. Furthermore, we expect the Republican Party to use the money to promote these policies and, yes, to win elections.""
2
Why is this surprising?! here is what NYT published in July: www.nytimes.com/2016/07/20/magazine/how-donald-trump-picked-his-running-...
Quote:
"...Donald Jr. wanted to make him an offer nonetheless: Did he have any interest in being the most powerful vice president in history?
When Kasich’s adviser asked how this would be the case, Donald Jr. explained that his father’s vice president would be in charge of domestic and foreign policy.
Then what, the adviser asked, would Trump be in charge of?
“Making America great again” was the casual reply."
and here we have it - the most powerful VP in history. Sad.
Quote:
"...Donald Jr. wanted to make him an offer nonetheless: Did he have any interest in being the most powerful vice president in history?
When Kasich’s adviser asked how this would be the case, Donald Jr. explained that his father’s vice president would be in charge of domestic and foreign policy.
Then what, the adviser asked, would Trump be in charge of?
“Making America great again” was the casual reply."
and here we have it - the most powerful VP in history. Sad.
8
Bah. It doesn't work. Poodles are smart.
12
True, that is a problem. Poodles are smart.
But I'm absolutely loving the mental image of Pence driving to Canada with his family, with Trump in a carrier strapped to the roof of his car!
But I'm absolutely loving the mental image of Pence driving to Canada with his family, with Trump in a carrier strapped to the roof of his car!
Betsy is the dumbest person in the room. She gets to drop the
A-bomb on the school.
A-bomb on the school.
7
Texas took the Imperialist Era out of their textbooks and considers the whole thing from Pilgrims to WWII "Expansionism." Kidz are not stupid; they are being lied to by the New Imperialists. I prefer Old Imperialdickheads. Think it might catch on with the kidz?
The object of Trump's administration is to undo the Atlantic Charter and the Geneva Conventions just as their Russian backed Alt-Idiots in Europe are presently attempting. Who thought the Brits would call it quits first?
If you've noticed, Trump doesn't recognize either of those documents, so what makes us think he'll observe the Magna Carta?
Come on, Trump would love nothing more than to sit in the Czar's Opera Box and ride around in his choo choo like the Last Imperialdickhead who passed Lenin a hot million dollar Cheka.
The object of Trump's administration is to undo the Atlantic Charter and the Geneva Conventions just as their Russian backed Alt-Idiots in Europe are presently attempting. Who thought the Brits would call it quits first?
If you've noticed, Trump doesn't recognize either of those documents, so what makes us think he'll observe the Magna Carta?
Come on, Trump would love nothing more than to sit in the Czar's Opera Box and ride around in his choo choo like the Last Imperialdickhead who passed Lenin a hot million dollar Cheka.
Pence's poodle? How about Conway's Tweety? ("I thought I saw a Putie Tat. I did, I did see my Putie Tat.")
N!M!P!
N!M!P!
7
What is up with the report that Melania is not moving into the White House?
He’s rich, charismatic, cultured, intelligent, good looking, well spoken and has a reputation for being sensitive to the needs of women, refugees and minorities.
So what if he’s crude, boorish and is running the White House like it was a clown show? Seven out of ten ain’t bad.
Hold on for a minute. Let me count those up again.
He’s rich, charismatic, cultured, intelligent, good looking, well spoken and has a reputation for being sensitive to the needs of women, refugees and minorities.
So what if he’s crude, boorish and is running the White House like it was a clown show? Seven out of ten ain’t bad.
Hold on for a minute. Let me count those up again.
5
What did he say to her that was so visibly upsetting? I've felt crestfallen before, but never at the moment my husband was being inaugurated. Trump needs to take lessons from that La La Land guy on how to be a real husband.
The publishing of this opinion is against the core values, beliefs, and mission of the NYT.
The NYT is well-respected and well-known. The NYT has beautiful period pieces that enlighten us to the suffering of people around the world. They have a fund to help the neediest people.
Now allowed for publishing on the NYT is the degrading and disrespect of a person by calling him a dog?
If the NYT is at the point of allowing bullying and not expressing feeling through superior reporting, then it is time for people at the NYT to step down and for the NYT to find people that exhibit integrity, passion, and motivation.
The NYT is well-respected and well-known. The NYT has beautiful period pieces that enlighten us to the suffering of people around the world. They have a fund to help the neediest people.
Now allowed for publishing on the NYT is the degrading and disrespect of a person by calling him a dog?
If the NYT is at the point of allowing bullying and not expressing feeling through superior reporting, then it is time for people at the NYT to step down and for the NYT to find people that exhibit integrity, passion, and motivation.
I think this is perfectly fine. Superior reporting doesn't work on Trump. We have a president who has insulted and degraded every group of people except for heterosexual white men. Are we all supposed to be respectful of a person who is as rude as he is and is not only turning our country into a joke he and his pal Bannon have clearly suggested that they want to destroy it? Trump ignores the opinions of the majority of people who didn't vote for him. He has made no attempt to show us that he thinks we are valuable citizens. They have shut down the Whitehouse comments phone line. Gloves off. No respect. Do what it takes to get him to pay attention.
180
"When a lawyer facing Trump in 2011 asked for a break to pump breastmilk for her infant daughter, The Donald reacted very poorly. “He got up, his face got red, he shook his finger at me and he screamed, ‘You’re disgusting, you’re disgusting,’ and he ran out of there,” attorney Elizabeth Beck told CNN. Trump’s attorney does not dispute that his client called Beck “disgusting.”" - The Huff
This was a tiny taste of how people get treated in Donald's world. So why should the media treat a filthy dog like him with kid gloves?
This was a tiny taste of how people get treated in Donald's world. So why should the media treat a filthy dog like him with kid gloves?
30
Actually I think that your point was addressed in Gail's essay, many of us thin it is very unfair to those named dogs to be compared to Trump. Dogs show compassion, intelligence and even occasionally self-control -traits sorely lacking in the sociopathic presence in the White House. Indeed if a dog had tthe characteristics displayed by our current "president" it would be in danger of being put down.
33
Oh my what to say, Pence is a smooth talking spin master, the religious right are his slavish toadys; an icon of the far right, much of which is composed of those well educated white men and their well bred women in their suburban mansions.
Religion rules in their enclaves, Jesus saves is their motto, what he saves is hard to say tho. A recent survey found that two out of three could not produce $1000 in an emergency. Ah but they are financial experts with their median income being in the lower 30%.
Of course they want well paying jobs, they seem to think those GOP nabobs are just waiting to reward them with pots of gold by creating work for them.
They certainly like the Trump's rhetoric with words like incredible, wonderful, great Americans, and all the flattery they can absorb. It reminds me of Berne's Transactional Analysis, they are getting their strokes. They are hearing what they want to hear, evading the dictates of the real world.
They have been compared to people who accept prognostications of the weather from a rodent in place of those liberal scientists. We have seen statements from this group showing suspicion of those college professors and the educated. Their common sense precludes knowledge and fact, and they have a guru who gives the alternate facts to assuage their concerns, K Conway, and the propaganda minster Sean Spicer.
Yes the country is on a march to greatness, led by the sages of 2000BC.
Religion rules in their enclaves, Jesus saves is their motto, what he saves is hard to say tho. A recent survey found that two out of three could not produce $1000 in an emergency. Ah but they are financial experts with their median income being in the lower 30%.
Of course they want well paying jobs, they seem to think those GOP nabobs are just waiting to reward them with pots of gold by creating work for them.
They certainly like the Trump's rhetoric with words like incredible, wonderful, great Americans, and all the flattery they can absorb. It reminds me of Berne's Transactional Analysis, they are getting their strokes. They are hearing what they want to hear, evading the dictates of the real world.
They have been compared to people who accept prognostications of the weather from a rodent in place of those liberal scientists. We have seen statements from this group showing suspicion of those college professors and the educated. Their common sense precludes knowledge and fact, and they have a guru who gives the alternate facts to assuage their concerns, K Conway, and the propaganda minster Sean Spicer.
Yes the country is on a march to greatness, led by the sages of 2000BC.
3
I'm on a biz trip in Canada at the moment and Trump's remarks on the Celebrity ratings were covered here as a news item "thusly"': footage of his comments verbatim, a beat from the news anchor and then, moving on...
It reminded me of a family dinner table dominated by the abrupt outbursts of a marble-seeking patriarch.
(Incidentally, the next shot was of Justin Trudeau assuring Muslim Canadians that 36 million hearts were breaking with theirs, in the wake of the Quebec City terrorist attack.)
I'm not sure that I have ever in my life been so embarrassed of a political figure.
It reminded me of a family dinner table dominated by the abrupt outbursts of a marble-seeking patriarch.
(Incidentally, the next shot was of Justin Trudeau assuring Muslim Canadians that 36 million hearts were breaking with theirs, in the wake of the Quebec City terrorist attack.)
I'm not sure that I have ever in my life been so embarrassed of a political figure.
8
Are Pence ond Bannon the reincarnation (so to speak) of Dick Cheney plus Donald Rumsfeld rolled into a ball together as a modern day Cardinal Richelieu? The world wonders.
One thing seems clear. It's not hard to pull the strings of a puppet who's devoid of principles and character. With only master salesmanship to fall back on, the Prince awaits just a sellable whisper in the ear to try to burnish his image as... what? Never mind. He'll take it from there as long as he appears - a legend his own mind - as a "winner".
A man who continues to characterize his win as a "historic landslide" in the Electoral College and as a "winner" of the popular vote (after casually tossing out three - maybe five - million "illegitimate" votes depending on the venue, the audience and perhaps the time of day) - is a natural sucker for the Cardinals, as long as they preface suggestions with "Remember, you won!"
What Trump needs, and will likely never have, is a man in the ancient Roman Triumphator's chariot reminding him that :"Thou are but a mortal man."
What he needs, and gets, is the two Cardinals reminding him that "Thou art a winner!" In Trumpworld, that's good enough,.
One thing seems clear. It's not hard to pull the strings of a puppet who's devoid of principles and character. With only master salesmanship to fall back on, the Prince awaits just a sellable whisper in the ear to try to burnish his image as... what? Never mind. He'll take it from there as long as he appears - a legend his own mind - as a "winner".
A man who continues to characterize his win as a "historic landslide" in the Electoral College and as a "winner" of the popular vote (after casually tossing out three - maybe five - million "illegitimate" votes depending on the venue, the audience and perhaps the time of day) - is a natural sucker for the Cardinals, as long as they preface suggestions with "Remember, you won!"
What Trump needs, and will likely never have, is a man in the ancient Roman Triumphator's chariot reminding him that :"Thou are but a mortal man."
What he needs, and gets, is the two Cardinals reminding him that "Thou art a winner!" In Trumpworld, that's good enough,.
4
The NYT needs to establish truthfully who is in charge. First it was Bannon, now Pence (Shades of Dick Cheney indeed). You are seriously causing us a lot of laughs as you fall all over yourselves trying to come up with more original ways to crucify the Don. Sure, Trump is a far cry from any experienced politician. But what makes you think that Hillary was so "Grand"? And how do you justify a billion blown on her and all those 91 per cent posts of her winning the Presidency when she was a Wall Streeter also? Good luck in trying to make the Dem losers relevant. Something they have yet to attempt themselves. THAT was why they lost and Trump won. What seriously other than Obamacare have they given us in their time in office? Weakened laws, no transparency, cuts in food stamps unopposed, more revelations about spying on us and allies. I can run down a list of things we lost. It's on record if you google it.
Love it! Thank you for making me laugh at the horrific reality happening before my eyes. If only it weren't true.
I was shocked at the lack of spiritual decorum at the National Prayer Breakfast event - were there serious prayers given for women and children who are suffering, or prayers asking for wisdom and guidance at this hour of need? What do these supposedly religious, praying types pray for, I wonder. Why didn't someone stand up and shout "enough"? Did anyone pull out an offering plate and say, "Come on, give all you've got for the suffering humanity around us"?
No, Pence and his Poodle represent a brand of selfish religious piety called it's all about me. Jesus had the perfect word for the self-righteous Pharisees in his day -- hypocrites.
Pence and his Poodle are hypocrites deluxe.
I was shocked at the lack of spiritual decorum at the National Prayer Breakfast event - were there serious prayers given for women and children who are suffering, or prayers asking for wisdom and guidance at this hour of need? What do these supposedly religious, praying types pray for, I wonder. Why didn't someone stand up and shout "enough"? Did anyone pull out an offering plate and say, "Come on, give all you've got for the suffering humanity around us"?
No, Pence and his Poodle represent a brand of selfish religious piety called it's all about me. Jesus had the perfect word for the self-righteous Pharisees in his day -- hypocrites.
Pence and his Poodle are hypocrites deluxe.
11
Leaving aside the utter lack of fitness for public office represented by Betsy DeVos, or the President's unaccountably wierd fixation on Arnold Schwarzenegger, can anyone -- anyone -- still believe the President's "drain the swamp" schtick? If so, these credulous folks should know that it's all a very Grimm fairy tale. Or maybe an even grimmer nightmare.
www.endthemadnessnow.org
www.endthemadnessnow.org
6
A partial list: Mexico's on notice, Nato is on notice, Iran's on notice, the Muslim world is on notice, Arnold is on notice, China is on notice, Austrailia is on notice, the media is on notice, Hollywood is on notice, India is on notice, Russia and Israel might or might not be on notice, Great Britain also maybe yes and maybe no on notice, but Yemen and all American intelligence agencies and their agents except (mis) Director Comey of the FBI are totally on notice while Saudi Arabia, The United Arab Emirates etc etc are most certainly not. Expecting very soon to be put on notice are South Korea and Japan. Canada is still swooning over the Koch brother's oily big wet kiss to Alberta so hardly notices it's been put on notice by Trump over Nafta.
Gail, this reader votes for Trump as Pence's Scottish Terrier; incessantly yap, yap yapping and nipping at the guest's ankles while Pence wanders around the white mansion with a plastic smile on his face and pretends not at all to notice what his psychotic little pooch is up to.
Gail, this reader votes for Trump as Pence's Scottish Terrier; incessantly yap, yap yapping and nipping at the guest's ankles while Pence wanders around the white mansion with a plastic smile on his face and pretends not at all to notice what his psychotic little pooch is up to.
12
Well, it is obvious that Pence is pleased with his Poodle. That half smile that is perpetually pasted on his face says, "Little Poodle peed again on the bed but what is a soiled mattress or two."
You must remember that Pence is the religious one in the inner circle. Oh, I know. When you label anyone a Republican they automatically get a visa to heaven. But Pence got his visa the old-fashioned way they say, by believing what born again evangelicals believe. So he must be pretty uncomfortable there in the "locker room" with all those tough talking dudes (and with a lady present too). He reminds me of a good Christian boy trapped in a situation he never wants his pastor to hear about. And so when the talk gets tough he puts on that half-smile that allows him to say to his pastor, "I didn't approve of that, but . . . And all the while it seems to say to his Poodle, "nice doggy, you are so cute."
You must remember that Pence is the religious one in the inner circle. Oh, I know. When you label anyone a Republican they automatically get a visa to heaven. But Pence got his visa the old-fashioned way they say, by believing what born again evangelicals believe. So he must be pretty uncomfortable there in the "locker room" with all those tough talking dudes (and with a lady present too). He reminds me of a good Christian boy trapped in a situation he never wants his pastor to hear about. And so when the talk gets tough he puts on that half-smile that allows him to say to his pastor, "I didn't approve of that, but . . . And all the while it seems to say to his Poodle, "nice doggy, you are so cute."
7
Can you imagine if doctors or lawyer or therapists didn't have to act in the best interests of their patients or clients? If they just looked after their own interests in the hopes of making a buck?
Can you hear it? "Sure, she didn't need surgery, but I'll make a ton off the operation!" We don't allow unscrupulous practitioners to bilk their clients, unless of course they're financial analysts.
Meanwhile, the poodle's keepers want to privatize social security. That'll work out great, right? Force a bunch of inexperienced investors into the market, then let the financial experts cheat them. Post retirement they can get dinner at the soup kitchen, I guess.
No wonder Trump "loves the uneducated". They won't notice when they're getting a raw deal. And Betsy DeVos can make sure to increase the numbers of uneducated voters.
Can you hear it? "Sure, she didn't need surgery, but I'll make a ton off the operation!" We don't allow unscrupulous practitioners to bilk their clients, unless of course they're financial analysts.
Meanwhile, the poodle's keepers want to privatize social security. That'll work out great, right? Force a bunch of inexperienced investors into the market, then let the financial experts cheat them. Post retirement they can get dinner at the soup kitchen, I guess.
No wonder Trump "loves the uneducated". They won't notice when they're getting a raw deal. And Betsy DeVos can make sure to increase the numbers of uneducated voters.
16
Ms Collins,
With all due respect, your comparison of 45 to a Poodle, Pug, or Pomeranian is totally off base.
I suggest that you Google an American-Kennel-Club-dog-show-ready Lhasa Apso. When you do so, you will see that I have a good eye for identifying similarities between 45 and dog breeds, especially in the swoop of the hair.
You raise a genuine serious issue with regard to Mike Pence. By now, the Republicans are counting on 45's propensity to be seduced by shiny objects (gold bathrooms, beautiful women, the thought of himself in front of a microphone). They know that will allow Pence to distract 45 and command him to heel.
We are in for a very rough ride with these guys, a ride much scarier than the first time I went on the Cyclone in Coney Island as a kid and an awful lot longer. God help us.
With all due respect, your comparison of 45 to a Poodle, Pug, or Pomeranian is totally off base.
I suggest that you Google an American-Kennel-Club-dog-show-ready Lhasa Apso. When you do so, you will see that I have a good eye for identifying similarities between 45 and dog breeds, especially in the swoop of the hair.
You raise a genuine serious issue with regard to Mike Pence. By now, the Republicans are counting on 45's propensity to be seduced by shiny objects (gold bathrooms, beautiful women, the thought of himself in front of a microphone). They know that will allow Pence to distract 45 and command him to heel.
We are in for a very rough ride with these guys, a ride much scarier than the first time I went on the Cyclone in Coney Island as a kid and an awful lot longer. God help us.
5
and be sure those nuclear keys are small, dull, and easily lost in the back of a drawer full of shiny cuff-links.
1
When my family was researching dogs we took a look at poodles but passed. They were reported to be temperamental animals that were difficult to train, were not friendly around kids, and had grooming needs that were onerous. Good show dogs, for sure, but very high-maintenance.
We should all wish Mr. Pence the best of luck as he attempts to House train the newest addition to his family.
We should all wish Mr. Pence the best of luck as he attempts to House train the newest addition to his family.
5
Haiku
Vicious dog at large---
GOP says don't worry...
It's only rabies.
Vicious dog at large---
GOP says don't worry...
It's only rabies.
14
That Trump has Narcissistic Personality Disorder has been written about by several psychiatrists, but a strong case can be made that he is on the autistic spectrum, and his narcissism is a protective mechanism to shield him from being exposed as incompetent at engaging reality.
Trump really has no skills beyond bluster and hucksterism - his real estate 'empire' is actually nothing more than a 'branding' scheme putting his name onto other investor's products - buildings, suits, golf courses, steaks, etc.
Being nearly illiterate and uneducated, Trump craves approval from external sources since he has no inner core of character or demonstrable abilities. He has surrounded himself with surrogate daddies, Pence and Bannon, and possibly Putin, just as he once desperately sought the approval of his tyrannical father.
We can laugh and be snarky about all this, but we really are in serious trouble.
Trump really has no skills beyond bluster and hucksterism - his real estate 'empire' is actually nothing more than a 'branding' scheme putting his name onto other investor's products - buildings, suits, golf courses, steaks, etc.
Being nearly illiterate and uneducated, Trump craves approval from external sources since he has no inner core of character or demonstrable abilities. He has surrounded himself with surrogate daddies, Pence and Bannon, and possibly Putin, just as he once desperately sought the approval of his tyrannical father.
We can laugh and be snarky about all this, but we really are in serious trouble.
10
I agree completely. He has never given even a three-minute, extemporaneous talk on any factual subject. He is not capable of elementary feats like summarizing both sides of any argument and setting forth the faults and virtues of the arguments on each side. He is only capable of sentence fragments, leaving out the verb or object and thus inviting the listener to fill in their own thoughts.
3
Your comparison of our president to a dog is an insult to dogs.
It's true that my dogs will bark and put on a show of force to other dogs and some cats. They also know about bluster (although sometimes they recoil in fear from cats who come straight at them). But how many dogs are willing to strip health insurance from millions of people, sending many of them to bankruptcy or an early grave? How many dogs blithely talk about using nuclear weapons? How many dogs discriminate based on religion, sex, race? How many dogs want to destroy our government, Medicare, Social Security?
I rest my case.
It's true that my dogs will bark and put on a show of force to other dogs and some cats. They also know about bluster (although sometimes they recoil in fear from cats who come straight at them). But how many dogs are willing to strip health insurance from millions of people, sending many of them to bankruptcy or an early grave? How many dogs blithely talk about using nuclear weapons? How many dogs discriminate based on religion, sex, race? How many dogs want to destroy our government, Medicare, Social Security?
I rest my case.
13
It has become extremely difficult for me to figure out who is leading Donald Trump by the nose and controlling his actions. Here the editorialist argues it is Mike Pence who owns Trumps mind, but earlier this week it was argued Steve Bannon controlled Trump. But, I have read previously here that McConnell, Ryan and Preibus were going to manipulate and guide the Trump presidency. Jared and Ivanka Kuschner were also said to own Trump. And famously Vladimir Putin was operating Trump. Also, the Klan and alt-rightists ran the show.
But when I look at Trump, I see someone who is obviously his own man. From the hair to the way he ties his ties to all the, um, unique 3am tweets, to the endless gafs. I also think all the others are, as any employee of Trumps past, really afraid of Trump and the you're fired thing. He may be as crazy as a three dollar bill but it's all sui generis. Large and in charge. Only in America.
But when I look at Trump, I see someone who is obviously his own man. From the hair to the way he ties his ties to all the, um, unique 3am tweets, to the endless gafs. I also think all the others are, as any employee of Trumps past, really afraid of Trump and the you're fired thing. He may be as crazy as a three dollar bill but it's all sui generis. Large and in charge. Only in America.
7
No leashes are needed. I would argue that although Pence is almost always nearby, watching, ever watching, he is doing it for his own reasons: so that he will be ready to take over at a moment's notice. That probably will not happen, however, as Bannon is the true Big Man in the circle of advisors, the left hand man. When Trump has his meltdown, Bannon will arrange for someone else to become the replacement figurehead.
It doesn't matter what the constitution says, since this administration just forges ahead to accomplish its agenda in a series of unprecedented moves. Or perhaps to give meaning to the word "unpresidented".
It doesn't matter what the constitution says, since this administration just forges ahead to accomplish its agenda in a series of unprecedented moves. Or perhaps to give meaning to the word "unpresidented".
8
Will Pence follow the Republic tradition of traveling with his pooch on the roof of the family car? I know, its just a Romney thing; not a republican thing, but PLEASE tell it happen soon: Trump stuffed into an undersized dog crate strapped to the top of the VPs limo, spittle flying into the wind as he barks out random phrases that Steve Bannon records and rearranges into new executive orders.
The world will still go to hell, but we can smile from inside our hand baskets.
The world will still go to hell, but we can smile from inside our hand baskets.
11
pense is far more dangerous than trump. Believe it. The Republicans are drooling at the prospect of impeachment. Be careful what you wish for, you might get it.
1
The Betsy DeVos nomination vote is essentially a litmus test to determine the acidic level of a politician to the American people during the Trump era.
Betsy DeVos has almost no work experience, let alone experience in education (where her history appears to be limited to a drive-by viewing of a public school). Ms. DeVos has led an admirable career in the field of inherited wealth that has left her out of touch with the people who rely on the opportunities provided by public education.
And while I would love to applaud Senator Collins and Senator Murkowski for voting against Ms. DeVos, it must be noted that they could have stopped the DeVos nomination at the committee level. This leads me to believe that they have confirmation of how their fellow GOP senators will vote and are simply taking advantage of an opportunity to appease their constituents without obstructing President Trump's nomination.
Ms. DeVos's lack of preparation and knowledge, and the demonstration of disrespect to the Senators on the committee and to the American public by her failure to study up, at her original hearing was reason enough for her nomination to be stalled at the committee level. If it were possible to embarrass President Trump, then Ms. DeVos's stand before the committee would have done it. But alas.
A true stand on integrity and principle requires more than the show now being put on Senators Collins and Murkowski.
Betsy DeVos has almost no work experience, let alone experience in education (where her history appears to be limited to a drive-by viewing of a public school). Ms. DeVos has led an admirable career in the field of inherited wealth that has left her out of touch with the people who rely on the opportunities provided by public education.
And while I would love to applaud Senator Collins and Senator Murkowski for voting against Ms. DeVos, it must be noted that they could have stopped the DeVos nomination at the committee level. This leads me to believe that they have confirmation of how their fellow GOP senators will vote and are simply taking advantage of an opportunity to appease their constituents without obstructing President Trump's nomination.
Ms. DeVos's lack of preparation and knowledge, and the demonstration of disrespect to the Senators on the committee and to the American public by her failure to study up, at her original hearing was reason enough for her nomination to be stalled at the committee level. If it were possible to embarrass President Trump, then Ms. DeVos's stand before the committee would have done it. But alas.
A true stand on integrity and principle requires more than the show now being put on Senators Collins and Murkowski.
27
Yay! We officially have a dog back in Gail's political columns! If only this one were confined to a car roof instead of The Oval Office....
1
"Poodle" is good, very good. He's a whiney, pimped-out Poodle.
You've been waiting patiently to get him back for his nasty note and you're now holding his leash. Now send him a bejeweled dog collar - he'd probably wear it thinking it was a crown.
You've been waiting patiently to get him back for his nasty note and you're now holding his leash. Now send him a bejeweled dog collar - he'd probably wear it thinking it was a crown.
Putin's Puppett.
Pence's Poodle.
Bannon's Straw Boss.
While I love Pence's Poodle, I have to wonder if we will have to have a naming contest every week depending on whom Mr. Trump has most recently spent copious amounts of time.
Pence's Poodle.
Bannon's Straw Boss.
While I love Pence's Poodle, I have to wonder if we will have to have a naming contest every week depending on whom Mr. Trump has most recently spent copious amounts of time.
2
I demand a recount. Pomeranian fits so much better than poodle.
4
Remember the movie "Wag the Dog" with Dustin Hoffman? If not, check it out on Netflix or get it from your library.
1
Couldn't you have made the same point without the silly poodle nonsense? Silly schoolyard name calling. Writers who employ the Cheetos, orangutan, and now poodle nonsense, are wasting our time and money.
And how about "Putin's puppet"? Name calling may be silly, but Trump's unexplained affinity for the Russian devil is terrifying.
2
So Trump's son was telling the truth that it will be Pence running the administration and his father will make America great again. Hang on to your hats folks this looks like a rough ride.
3
Too afraid to laugh.
13
Gail, your column would be a riot if it weren't spot-on, revoltingly true. Do the rules say anything about impeaching the POTUS and the VP together? But then we'd have Paul Ryan to contend with – gack!
5
Trump's entourage and cabinet are more like the dog packs of my youth, before the lifesaving leash laws came into effect. An aura of unbridled appetite and extreme cruelty seemed to overtake individual dogs who were normally quite docile at home. I distinctly remember my middle school teacher closing the window shades to shield our tender eyes from the debauchery unfolding on the game fields that surrounded our school. Their daily menace was an adversity that made us much faster runners and excellent tree climbers. The pack drained all domesticity away, turning helpmates into hedonistic hellhounds, red in tooth and "paw".
If laissez faire never worked with man's best friend, what makes anyone think it will work with his worst enemy - himself?
"if men were angels, no government would be necessary." James Madison.
If laissez faire never worked with man's best friend, what makes anyone think it will work with his worst enemy - himself?
"if men were angels, no government would be necessary." James Madison.
6
Any chance that former-Governor Romney can put the Big P in a crate on the top of his car and drive him to Canada?
8
He may be Pence's Poodle but he's also Bannon's B a e i o u tch (leave out the a e o u).
16
On behalf of Jack Philipson, 12 year old poodle extraordinaire, I object to the the assignation, Pence's Poodle. We had to put up with Tony Blair being Bush's poodle, enough is enough. WOOF!
3
Russian President and Czar wannabe Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin is the big bad Brown Bear pulling the leash of the half- German Pomeranian and the half- Scottish Terrier Donald Trump while Mike Pence is the Irish Terrier on the other Putin leash.
5
Here's the thing about poodles: They are really good at training the person on the end of the leash. You think you are training them, but they are really making you do what they want.
3
While the tone of this column is fun, I'm not sure we have time for fun right now. TrumpBannon is out to secure nothing less than a revolution and it's as serious as a business as it can be.
7
Does it really matter what dog breed as long s the dog in question doesn't destroy the house by chewing the furniture, peeing on the carpet and taking a dump in the dining room? Unfortunately, I'm afraid that 45is hell bent on destroying the house.
2
Oh, Gail, what you don't understand is that Trump won the popular vote by at least half a billion votes and the electoral vote by as much as the last five presidents combined. He is really and truly adored by well over half the human race. Pence's poodle? Goodness no, he's that cute little kitty that always shows up on the fringes of the weather sites.
2
It's two weeks now and many of us are more upset and more frightened by the minute. So which President is Trump the poodle to, President Bannon who writes his executive orders and wants war with China, or Pence who just seems more like a guy with a broom and dust pan running around reassuring people it will be all right, that he only wants to do in women and gay people. There's nothing to be optimistic about with any of these folks. We are doomed.
5
Don't forget....Father Mike noted, during the campaign, that he did not go out to venues that served alcohol unless his wife was with him, to supervise.
That is so frightening, I don't even know where to begin...
NOT my president.
That is so frightening, I don't even know where to begin...
NOT my president.
6
If voters have agreed Trump is "Pence's Poodle" what name will be chosen for Bannon? The Westminister Kennel show this week should be helpful in suggesting some alternatives: basset, borzoi, beagle? My vote would be for Bannon's Borzoi. There is the hair of course as well as the diva personality and the suggestion of a foreign dog breed that once had a purpose but now just gets trotted out for photo ops.
7
Bannon is the Big Bad Wolf.
1
"How bad do you need to be to get rejected for Donald Trump’s cabinet?" Gail posits this morning. The answer is, of course, dear Gail, don't even rise to the level of his radar. We readers, "your people" as your call us, would be lost without you. Please, do NOT consider any of his offers for Secretary of Dogs.
Why, we all had unababshed fun when you were pillorying Romney and his mutt on the roof, and now we read about Pence's pug. You must suffer from Stage 4 Canine-a-philia. This sad disease is caused by having dogs in your belfrey.
Trump may have a tail at his rear, as you say, but he can't match your pup in the parietal cortex.
Why, we all had unababshed fun when you were pillorying Romney and his mutt on the roof, and now we read about Pence's pug. You must suffer from Stage 4 Canine-a-philia. This sad disease is caused by having dogs in your belfrey.
Trump may have a tail at his rear, as you say, but he can't match your pup in the parietal cortex.
1
When Republicans talk about eliminating burdensome and expensive regulations, I always visualize dropping rules that require companies to submit 42-page data reports monthly. I imagine they want reforms that say they would only have to submit a 5-page report twice yearly instead.
But, no. Republicans actually mean they want to eliminate rules that stop them from streaming methane into the environment, or stop them from hoodwinking old people out of their retirement savings. Those are the kind of regulations they say are too expensive and burdensome.
But, no. Republicans actually mean they want to eliminate rules that stop them from streaming methane into the environment, or stop them from hoodwinking old people out of their retirement savings. Those are the kind of regulations they say are too expensive and burdensome.
3
What he needs is a trip to one-way ticket to Canada with the Romney family.
And delousing.
And delousing.
2
Love you. Fabulous. Funny. Period. Just want to correct one teensy grammatical—well not an error, exactly, but more of an age-related—faux pas: The comment ". . . because, you know, of he hair" should really be: ". . . because you know, the hair." Because, you know, the rhythm. Done.
Welcome to the Gail Collins Canine Universe Beauty Pageant!
Good news, folks! The world's most prominent contenders - North Korea, Sudan, China, Russia, ...... - have decided NOT to withdraw their entries and relinquish their chance at the title to the USA's top dog, formerly thought to be a sure winner.
They found out there's a talent contest.
Good news, folks! The world's most prominent contenders - North Korea, Sudan, China, Russia, ...... - have decided NOT to withdraw their entries and relinquish their chance at the title to the USA's top dog, formerly thought to be a sure winner.
They found out there's a talent contest.
5
Stop letting Trump off the hook. He is responsible.
3
All presidents are used as instrumentalities of the needs of others for position and power. The only question is how much and whether "the big guy" can assert himself in times of dire need or crisis. Cheney appointed himself acting president during 9-11, 2001 and attempted to give military orders for which he had no authority. In the Reagan years, action memos were supposed to be reduced to one page (takes less time) and the joke around DC was that the list of option would be short: one.
In some degree, Washington, DC, is all a big show with people behind the scenes, little known and underpaid, doing all of the research, drafting memos and pushing in a particular direction. Remember the Wizard of Oz? Not radically different.
Those now guiding Trump have no doubt studied his moods, his Grand Canyon ego needing to be filled hourly and his desire to look good by acting forcefully. A president can have an easier time (for awhile) surrounded by aides who know how to coax him in the direction he wants to go. Self betrayal looms.
A major portion of Washington is actively engaged in trying to capture any president and the very best at it, historically and always, is the American military. Since it is the biggest part of the discretionary budget, and all those tanks, planes and ships are at the ready, very seductive.
Bannon, Pence and others, knowing this president's ignorance of how things work in government, probably see him as an easy target, a turkey ready for plucking.
In some degree, Washington, DC, is all a big show with people behind the scenes, little known and underpaid, doing all of the research, drafting memos and pushing in a particular direction. Remember the Wizard of Oz? Not radically different.
Those now guiding Trump have no doubt studied his moods, his Grand Canyon ego needing to be filled hourly and his desire to look good by acting forcefully. A president can have an easier time (for awhile) surrounded by aides who know how to coax him in the direction he wants to go. Self betrayal looms.
A major portion of Washington is actively engaged in trying to capture any president and the very best at it, historically and always, is the American military. Since it is the biggest part of the discretionary budget, and all those tanks, planes and ships are at the ready, very seductive.
Bannon, Pence and others, knowing this president's ignorance of how things work in government, probably see him as an easy target, a turkey ready for plucking.
6
It must be a real sacrifice for #notmypresident's billionaire synchophants, all sucking at the government's trough, to be underpaid.
Gail, I'm disappointed. Poodles are intelligent and rather dignified. I was really hoping for Pence's Pekingese—not to insult anyone's dog, but the disagreeable-looking smooshed face and stubby legs fit nicely. Can't you override this popular vote with an executive order?
10
Since Trump hates to be upstaged, now is the time to make Arnold S.
a RATINGS HERO: turn on "Celebrity Apprentice" every Monday night
(NBC @ 8:00 Eastern) until the show's ratings skyrocket. This may seem
a bit hokey, but keep in mind that Donald is consumed with his image,
not with policy, and he will bluster when the Arnold's ratings rise.
a RATINGS HERO: turn on "Celebrity Apprentice" every Monday night
(NBC @ 8:00 Eastern) until the show's ratings skyrocket. This may seem
a bit hokey, but keep in mind that Donald is consumed with his image,
not with policy, and he will bluster when the Arnold's ratings rise.
6
The problem is Trump is a producer of the show. He may have even harped about it to increase the ratings. He is not stupid but sly.
1
I'm "sick to my stomach" scared of these two men. I say we should be beware of the smiling façade of Mike Pence. He looks harmless, trotting along behind Donald, his face frozen in the same look, but watch out!
4
Oh yes, Ms. Collins, there are indeed two Trumps. In fact, more than two Trumps.
Primary is Impresario-Trump - Master of the show. And what a show he gives us.
There is Businessman-Trump - Shrewd, ruthless, cunning, owner of the phrase, "You're Fired!", author of 'The Art of the Deal' - a book he has never read cover-to-cover. Businessman-Trump can't be bothered with details. Details, after all, are for Losers.
There is Campaigner-Trump - Tireless, fearless, spinner of tall tales, liar of epic stature, never afraid to demean the less-powerful to rouse his crowds to rowdy.
Dealmaker-Trump - All wise, all powerful, always ready to demand the impossible of foe or friend, consummate master of the zero-sum game, with all the bankruptcies and lawsuits needed to prove it.
And Policy-Trump - Commanding, certain, quick to decide, unconcerned with collateral damage, still getting sued, still treating suits against him with disdain.
You may offer Barker-Trump, the one who knows how many tickets are sold. You may offer others I simply don't recall. Or perhaps, I don't care to recall. Or missed in the bustle of trying to follow the Many-Trumps.
I suspect all these Trumps have made me dizzy.
So to, the nation and world.
Primary is Impresario-Trump - Master of the show. And what a show he gives us.
There is Businessman-Trump - Shrewd, ruthless, cunning, owner of the phrase, "You're Fired!", author of 'The Art of the Deal' - a book he has never read cover-to-cover. Businessman-Trump can't be bothered with details. Details, after all, are for Losers.
There is Campaigner-Trump - Tireless, fearless, spinner of tall tales, liar of epic stature, never afraid to demean the less-powerful to rouse his crowds to rowdy.
Dealmaker-Trump - All wise, all powerful, always ready to demand the impossible of foe or friend, consummate master of the zero-sum game, with all the bankruptcies and lawsuits needed to prove it.
And Policy-Trump - Commanding, certain, quick to decide, unconcerned with collateral damage, still getting sued, still treating suits against him with disdain.
You may offer Barker-Trump, the one who knows how many tickets are sold. You may offer others I simply don't recall. Or perhaps, I don't care to recall. Or missed in the bustle of trying to follow the Many-Trumps.
I suspect all these Trumps have made me dizzy.
So to, the nation and world.
3
Mike's most important job is to have enough baggies in his pocket to pick up his poodle's trumps.
3
This is stupid, and unfair to Poodles. They are very friendly, love to play and only want to help their humans. Maybe "A puddle of Poodle Piddle" would be more apt. But pusillanimous dastard would be more accurate.
8
Actually, Ms. Collins, it is Steve Bannon who is running the show at the White House. He has installed his own handpicked henchman into the WH, called the Strategic Initiative Group, to vie with other traditional centers of power - like the National Security Council (check out the WaPo on this), Bannon is the "Man with the Alt-Right plan" - and he is executing it while Trump and Pence toddle off to their prayer breakfasts and such. I now refer always to the BannonTrump Admin. If DT thinks the Country sees Bannon as the 'one with the bigger brain' - he must have already noticed that Steve has bigger hands - then maybe his pathologic narcissism with drive a wedge between them - and drive Bannon out of the WH.
8
my dogs don't like the poodle down the street and the feeling is mutual. But they are Chihuahuas- nasty Mexican dogs. Yes. Pence's Poodle. thank you for focusing on Pence. He is behind all the mockery of Christianity and denying Planned Parenthood funding and reproductive rights for American women. He should visit the countries where women are enslaved by the lack of control or rights over their reproductive lives. Then he can come home and tell "mother" his wife we need to resign and become missionaries.
2
Feckless, unruly, callous king that rules us means politics has gone awry. The dog metaphor is apt, but it merely shows us that Pence is as scary as Trump. A line from Shakespeare seems to sum up Trump: "Methinks the lady dost protest too much!" His motto ought to be "Make America small again," since he wants nothing to do with a world he can't control. Instead of political scientists telling us about this policy or that, we ought to get our best psychologists to study the ignorance and fear of so many of us that Trump got elected. This king of chaos still hasn't shown us his tax returns, and his business holdings. It's no wonder he is all flash and spark. We forget really important things about this ego maniac.
Pence is really Putin. Admit it; you've never seen them in the same place at the same time.
Nah, that's giving both of them too much credit.
Nah, that's giving both of them too much credit.
6
Another great column -- thank you for making me smile!
Let's have a contest to come up with the best pictures of Pence and his Poodle promenading along Pennsylvania Ave.
I'm imagining Pence in a red dress, string of pearls, high heels, and with a stylish fascinator on his head. The big Poodle is prancing, tail up high, ears forward, and looking down proudly on the smaller dogs around him.
Let's have a contest to come up with the best pictures of Pence and his Poodle promenading along Pennsylvania Ave.
I'm imagining Pence in a red dress, string of pearls, high heels, and with a stylish fascinator on his head. The big Poodle is prancing, tail up high, ears forward, and looking down proudly on the smaller dogs around him.
3
Well, there is a little added clause in the Constitution that a mentally ill president can be removed due to mental illness, and 45 clearly suffers from several different ones.
For a short time Pence we'll have the nation's Preacher-in- Chief at the helm of the government, one who won't be elected for the highest job in the land during the next general election.
And don't forget, Pence's hair looks a lot better to look at for a couple of years than the orange fox on #45.
For a short time Pence we'll have the nation's Preacher-in- Chief at the helm of the government, one who won't be elected for the highest job in the land during the next general election.
And don't forget, Pence's hair looks a lot better to look at for a couple of years than the orange fox on #45.
7
I see Trump more as a misguided attack dog. A particularly counter-productive aspect of Trump's behavior is that although his ego (like all egos) desires love and respect, instead of doing what would make more people appreciate him, he invests all his emotional energy in fighting against, whining about and rejecting the concerns and objections of the over 50% of Americas who didn't vote for him. If this attack dog conflict wasn't so pathological, Trump would see that it would be a win-win opportunity for both he and his ego were he to seek to win over more Americans, rather than force so many of us to be loud foes.
"Poodle" works with "Pence," but likening Trump to this breed of dog is a misnomer. Poodles are among the most intelligent of canines. They train relatively easily and make excellent, sensitive companions to humans. They're great in the water. They have a keen sense of smell. They're elegant. None of this applies to our bull-in-a-china-shop 45th president.
4
Brilliant, Gail! I look forward to hearing much more about The Poodle.
1
Yes--Pence's Poodle. He's really more like a Yorkie, a little mop that needs a haircut, yapping and bouncing and peeing on the rug. But Pence's Yorkie doesn't roll alliteratively off the tongue. And the word "poodle" is so evocative of, you know, poo. Apologies to fellow dog-lovers, but surely you will agree, no matter what the breed, when you have a dog, poo is a problem.
2
Gail, your observations about how the Trump-Pence relationship is evolving is spot on. Sure Pence is the calm, reserved adult in the room, and Poodle is, well, a poodle that pulls on the leash, yap, yap, yaps, and eventually wets on whatever and wherever it wants. (In many cases, the constitution.) But enough of the dog metaphor. I think you're onto what God willing will happen in 2019 (assuming Trump lasts that long). Trump will continue to slash and burn as many regulations as possible, alienate world leaders (and the world, generally), disrespect groups of citizens, twist and bend the constitution until it conforms to his (Bannon's) nationalistic philosophy, and who knows what else. Fast forward to 2019, the economy has taken a giant leap backwards, citizens' rights threatened, a wall half built, and his approval rating is lower than it is now. Not being able to face the humiliation of a resounding defeat in the next election, he lies his way through a series of obvious excuses, declares his amazing work is done for the good of all mankind, and candidate Pence emerges. Poodle (back to the dog stuff) is given back to his originals owners and everyone is grateful he wasn't a pitbull.
4
Once again there is a quote by the president refers to himself in the third person. First time I saw was "if Putin likes Trupm, that's a good thing", now we see "The show’s creator was in the room and the president said he was sure “Mark [Burnett] will never, ever bet against Trump again.”". There must be some physiological reason for this. But I wonder if even worse is in store for our democracy, the royal We to come, viz. We Donald Trump decide ... (fill in the rest).
8
Gail, you are delightfully evil. Keep it up - you are one of the few bright spots in these frightening times.
6
Actually, I don't see Pence as the great puppet master. He looks more like the only person in the nudist camp with his clothes on. He has that strange embarrassment of the (somewhat) normal person in a crowd of crazies; the only sober person at a drunken orgy. He stands there with a blank smile on his face while The Donald moons our friends and allys.
1
"Pence's Poodle" is more like Putin's Pit Bull.
Call the dog what you like, he just needs putting down.
Call the dog what you like, he just needs putting down.
5
Keep it up Gail. Pences Poodle is also Putins Pomeranian or Pomegranate or PORNOgranate. Something like that. The more we poke him the more he will self immolate. I hate Pence but PP must be punished for his tactics.
2
Dunno about that! Could be Pence lapping at Precious Poodle's tiny feet... There's a vicious (VICIOUS!) rumor going around that it's Pence who's leaking all those Oval Office phone calls and weird stuff coming out of the White House. Such a helpful dude, trying to speed along the impeachment process so he can become our next Supreme Leader...
Again this is JUST A RUMOR some people are saying; of course, it could also be from one of those failing FAKE NEWS sites... So sad -- Arf, Arf...
Again this is JUST A RUMOR some people are saying; of course, it could also be from one of those failing FAKE NEWS sites... So sad -- Arf, Arf...
4
I am sorry to leave the dog analogy, but I've been thinking about "the poodle" as more like a malevolent Gracie Allen who confuses us with a snowstorm of tweets, each undoing the other. The result is a state of befuddled confusion in the listener who cannot tell fact from fiction. Fortunately for Gracie Allen, she had George Burns by her side; ever patient and understanding, lovingly amused by his wife. However Pence is no affable George Burns who centers his partner, but whose tight lipped grin belies a cold and manipulative man.
2
Thank you, Gail; we all need a LOT of humor these days. Please pay no attention to quibblers who think they know more about commentary than you or the other op-ed columnists. You're the bright spot on the horizon. Many of us are grateful for the Times and their absolute freedom of the press!
3
To quote Donald Trump, "What a nasty woman". What a nasty, hateful and vile column--and so totally expected from Gail Collins. It's in keeping with liberal story-telling about all Republican administrations. Somehow, Republican presidents have to be portrayed as puppets--of some darker behind-the-scenes forced.
Ronald Reagan was a puppet of Nancy--and her astrologers.
George Bush was a puppet of Carl Rove, or Dick Cheney.
Donald Trump, we now understand, is under the control of Putin, Bannon--and now Mike Pence.
Question: who was Barack Obama's puppet master? How about Valerie Jarrett, who sat in an office next to the Oval Office for 8 years? How about Rahm Emmanuel--who for the first 4 years was the face of the administration? Al Sharpton--who was invited to the White House dozens of times? Did he have his hands on Obama's strings?
Somehow, the Liberal narrative always needs to be that a Republican president is too clueless to make his own decisions--always ther is a dark force in the background, calling the shots. But who was that in front of thousands of cheering supporters, for the 18 months Trump ran for president? Who formulated the messages, the strategy, the campaign stops--which lead to the most stunning upset in American history?
A shout-out to all liberals: underestimate Trump at your peril. Think him a buffoon, call him names, make fun of his hair, parody him on SNL. In the meantime, he'll be guiding this country down an better path.
Ronald Reagan was a puppet of Nancy--and her astrologers.
George Bush was a puppet of Carl Rove, or Dick Cheney.
Donald Trump, we now understand, is under the control of Putin, Bannon--and now Mike Pence.
Question: who was Barack Obama's puppet master? How about Valerie Jarrett, who sat in an office next to the Oval Office for 8 years? How about Rahm Emmanuel--who for the first 4 years was the face of the administration? Al Sharpton--who was invited to the White House dozens of times? Did he have his hands on Obama's strings?
Somehow, the Liberal narrative always needs to be that a Republican president is too clueless to make his own decisions--always ther is a dark force in the background, calling the shots. But who was that in front of thousands of cheering supporters, for the 18 months Trump ran for president? Who formulated the messages, the strategy, the campaign stops--which lead to the most stunning upset in American history?
A shout-out to all liberals: underestimate Trump at your peril. Think him a buffoon, call him names, make fun of his hair, parody him on SNL. In the meantime, he'll be guiding this country down an better path.
1
Sorry Jesse . . . down "an" better path? It does not appear so . . . a government is not a business, diplomacy matters, there are many people in this country with different ideas and a good leader finds ways to take opposing views into account. What I dislike most about this administration is the creation of "us" and "them". There is no room to talk, discuss, think out loud without the incessant twitter condemnations. This can't be good for our country.
3
That "better path," Jesse. Would it lead to Perdition? Perhaps to Pandemonium? Or merely to unremitting Pother?
In the meanwhile, we notice you can't find a good word to say about Trump. Why is that?
In the meanwhile, we notice you can't find a good word to say about Trump. Why is that?
2
The GOP will keep Trump as long as the advances their far right wing domestic agenda. Huge tax cuts for Billionaires and their children and deregulation of banks and Wall Street. If he gets around to implementing stop and frisk in our cities and privatizing health, education and welfare that is just a bonus.
The only way to get Trump out of office is going to be to take the protests directly to the Republican Senators and Representatives who are propping him up so they can achieve their decades old agenda. When their jobs come into jeopardy then, and only then, they may think about saving our nation along with their jobs.
The only way to get Trump out of office is going to be to take the protests directly to the Republican Senators and Representatives who are propping him up so they can achieve their decades old agenda. When their jobs come into jeopardy then, and only then, they may think about saving our nation along with their jobs.
1
To limit this analogy to pet and owner is a bit shallow and trite. Perhaps a string puppet might be more apropos. The oligarchical structure that neoliberalism has produced and maintains demonstrates all the fine tuned mannerisms of a smoke and mirrors caricature.There is an agenda, there is a staged plan. I am placing my energy in the direction of the Justice Department. However in support of the Pence's poodle quip, The VP did say that his model for governance came from, dahdadah!!!!none other than sneering Dick Cheney. It haunts me to look back and see George Bush sitting with children in a grade school, while Cheney orchestrated and directed the 911 attacks on the twin towers, what a horrid precedent to follow.
2
You're barking up the wrong tree, Gail, if you think Pence is telling Trump what to do. You need to pick up the really big boulders and look underneath to see who is really Trump's master.
It is not the Pence tail that is wagging that low-down, dirty-dog Trump, and it is not even that anarchist pit-bull Bannon with an MBA from Harvard. It is Wall Street, the fossil fuel industry, and the mighty greedy 1%ers, who couldn't be happier at this double-dealing, con-artist, charlatan they have as their guard dog.
It is going to take more than little plastic baggies to clean up the yuge mess these dogs are making in our former democracy.
It is not the Pence tail that is wagging that low-down, dirty-dog Trump, and it is not even that anarchist pit-bull Bannon with an MBA from Harvard. It is Wall Street, the fossil fuel industry, and the mighty greedy 1%ers, who couldn't be happier at this double-dealing, con-artist, charlatan they have as their guard dog.
It is going to take more than little plastic baggies to clean up the yuge mess these dogs are making in our former democracy.
11
Gail you are right on the mark. Love it. This is the way, satire. More!
2
It should be illegal for any senator who has accepted money from a cabinet nominee to vote for that nominee - unless they donate those funds to a non-government charity. If they keep the money, they should be required, by law, to abstain.
7
What has happened to our guaranteed separation of Church and State? Mike Pence is a right-wing, extreme conservative, born-again Christian, so why didn't he go into the ministry where he belongs? As a public official, he has absolutely no right to tell women how to live their own private lives. Who does he think he is, God? Trump and Pence are the duo from hell.
8
Please let's go high and avoid name calling. It only gives the other side a reason to say we are being disrespectful. We have plenty of rational reasons to object to Trump's behavior without going down that road. We didn't like it when Obama was labeled with nicknames and we shouldn't do it either.
I have conservative relatives and there is no way I could forward them this column for their input - they would immediately just focus on the disrespect. Thanks for considering my input!
I have conservative relatives and there is no way I could forward them this column for their input - they would immediately just focus on the disrespect. Thanks for considering my input!
1
The disrespect is intentional and earned. Tell your conservative relatives they've seen nothing yet.
1
I'm not sure how creating nicknames for the President, like him or not, will in any way make "us" look better. It certainly fuels his supporters' frenzy by giving them more to work with. I expect better of Gail Collins and the Times.
About the kibble: no question that Trump doesn't want kibble; he wants the good stuff--like the dogs of the guy I saw at Costco yesterday. Here's what happened: a man was carrying a salami the size of a linebacker's arm; it must have cost $100. I gasped and his wife (walking at a distance from this freakish item) heard me and said in a stage whisper "It's for the dogs." Always remember that Mr. Trump is in it for himself--first, last, and everything in between. The truth is that if he's a dog he's a Lab with the eating gene and he wants it all. His distance from his businesses turns out to be nothing but a revocable trust which he can dismantle with a single signature if Donnie Jr., the guy who dresses like a made guy in a gangster movie makes the slightest misstep.
1
We were voting?
Darn, I missed it.
Well if the polls were still open and we are going for alliteration I vote for "Pence's Potbelly Pig".
Then again, pigs are pretty smart...
Darn, I missed it.
Well if the polls were still open and we are going for alliteration I vote for "Pence's Potbelly Pig".
Then again, pigs are pretty smart...
3
Oh, the moral courage! a nickname! Collect your check Ms. Collins.
1
The Republicans' descent into moral squalor is no more evident than in their support of the serial sexual assailant who heads their party and his astonishingly unqualified cabinet nominees, some of whom have committed perjury in the process while others, like DeVos, who have simply bought GOP senators' votes.
Collectively, it is Donald Trump's ham-fisted authoritarianism and Republicans' cowardice that pose the greatest threat to our Constitution and American values. Not refugees, not Muslims, not ISIS.
Collectively, it is Donald Trump's ham-fisted authoritarianism and Republicans' cowardice that pose the greatest threat to our Constitution and American values. Not refugees, not Muslims, not ISIS.
6
Yes, I also used to believe that Pence was the one in charge...but now, as I read and look and begin to understand with increasing alarm and horror, the real one who is in control is Bannon.
Your premise for these columns is already glaringly out of date. Sad.
Your premise for these columns is already glaringly out of date. Sad.
5
The voters who put this old dog in office figured he could learn a few new tricks. How to run a country, for starters. But I guess mastering Twitter was the acme of his accomplishments.
Donald doesn't read, so maybe our best hope is that he goes deaf. Good bye Fox News. Good bye Breitbart. In the meantime, Bannon and the Republican religious fanatics will keep rattling his kennel, Donald will keep barking at the media and marking 'his' territory, and the US will keep slowly sinking in the mire.
Donald doesn't read, so maybe our best hope is that he goes deaf. Good bye Fox News. Good bye Breitbart. In the meantime, Bannon and the Republican religious fanatics will keep rattling his kennel, Donald will keep barking at the media and marking 'his' territory, and the US will keep slowly sinking in the mire.
10
The best way to get under Trump's skin is to shun him: no photo ops of his signing exutive orders and displaying his signature. No coverage of meaningless ceremonial speeches. No footage of his walking to and from the helicopter to the WH. No nothing of his meaninglesss banter with Harley folks on the WH lawn.
Only cover real news. His disastrous, bombastic conversations with world leaders. His threats to send troops into countries with whom we are allied.
And, all the utterances made by him and his coterie after they are discovered to be lies. The latter should be more than enough to make the front page above fold for as long as he holds office.
Only cover real news. His disastrous, bombastic conversations with world leaders. His threats to send troops into countries with whom we are allied.
And, all the utterances made by him and his coterie after they are discovered to be lies. The latter should be more than enough to make the front page above fold for as long as he holds office.
8
Actually, seeing a poodle sitting at the desk in the Oval Office would be more reassuring and less of an embarrassment than Trump.
9
Trump learned to refer to himself in the third person from watching reruns of Seinfeld episodes where actors have refered to themselves in the third person as in "The Jimmy" episode which was 105th episode and of course George Constanza gets into the act as well. I can't wait for the classic reenactment of the Abbott and Costello "Who's on First" skit. Oh wait he's already doing that one with his Cabinet . So sad!
2
Excuse me but the Poodle is one of the most intelligent breeds. Need I say more? Pence's Puppet? Sure. But I agree with others who have commented that Bannon, not Pence, is the real Puppet Master. Pence is just Trump's Choir Boy foil for his nasty acts.
5
"But what can I tell you? A vote is a vote."
How quickly we forget.
There were millions of illegal votes cast, okay, and all of them went to poodle.
How quickly we forget.
There were millions of illegal votes cast, okay, and all of them went to poodle.
5
First article in a while conceding that the low unemployment rate is largely based on temporary work. Good job, NYT. Keep it up!!
Pastor Pence is managing Congressional relations, where restraints on the financial industry are being stripped away, and where, just yesterday, the House voted to end the restriction on severely mentally ill people from buying guns. Yes, you read that right.
The good mullah will next attack any laws that protect a woman's reproductive rights. If he has his way, and he will, women will be pods for the desires and delusions of dominant men, whether by rape or incest and even if the pod is near death.
Pastor Pence's Pods.
The good mullah will next attack any laws that protect a woman's reproductive rights. If he has his way, and he will, women will be pods for the desires and delusions of dominant men, whether by rape or incest and even if the pod is near death.
Pastor Pence's Pods.
2
What a better way to anger the president: in their next joint press conference, reporters should preface their questions to the VP with "President Pence".
That should anger the President and damage his fragile ego!
That should anger the President and damage his fragile ego!
2
At least Kellyanne Conway had the grace to admit that she misspoke on the "Bowling Green Massacre." I wish she'd admit all her other exaggerations and lies. But so long as she hangs out with Pence, she won't. Right-wing Christians have a very lurid history. They rejected Roman pomp and dogma, but blended God and Caesar wherever and whenever they could. Dr. Ian Paisley of Northern Ireland was a good example. He went from being The Mouth, a grenade lobber, an alumnus (by mail) of Bob Jones "University," to being First Minister of NI and leader of NI's largest Protestant Denomination.
He also knew where the bodies were (literally) and he knew the tragic story of the boys' home, Kincora, as well as knowing the list of prominent politicians and policemen who found R&R there. Paisley exploited that knowledge--like a good Christian. Maybe Pence has a way to go to catch up with that, but he has a much larger canvass to work with and many more lives to destroy.
He also knew where the bodies were (literally) and he knew the tragic story of the boys' home, Kincora, as well as knowing the list of prominent politicians and policemen who found R&R there. Paisley exploited that knowledge--like a good Christian. Maybe Pence has a way to go to catch up with that, but he has a much larger canvass to work with and many more lives to destroy.
4
So many of the President's Cabinet nominees do not merit their new positions and Ms. Betsy DeVos is not deserving of the post of Secretary of Education, and we can only hope she will be refused by a "nuclear vote' next week. Inherited dough doesn't make a Cabinet nominee brilliant, bright or intelligent. As for Trump being Mike Pence's "poodle" - you have the wrong G.O.P. dog holding his leash, Gail - Steve Bannon, Trump's pit-bull with a brain is holding his leash. Pence is the guy who will be the 46th President if Donald Trump leaves the Presidency (as soon as possible, if not sooner).
4
Poodles are sensitive, intelligent dogs, the sort that would take a bullet for you if they couldn't manage to drag you out of danger. Nationalised the big ones like I have or the tiny one that educated me about this breed. Now a Pomeranian......
1
NYT place a call to your cartoonists and give them these metaphors for Trump, all seen in the work of columnists and commenters:
Puppet (of Bannon) (This from many, me also.)
Lap dog with powder puff tail (Pence) (This from Gail.)
Charlie McCarthy (very far back in time whose voice was provided by ventriloquist Edgar Bergen, son of Swedish immigrants. You choose the ventriloquist for Charlie Trump) (This from Christine McM.)
Sock puppet with Putin's hand in the sock - see PS (this from Hugh Massengill)
Fill social media with these images and who knows what may happen.
Only-NeverInSweden.blogspot.com
Dual citizen US SE
PS-As concerns Putin, Dagens Nyheter 2/3 reports that 2 Swedes work for altRight in the US and with Richard Spencer see the US and Russia joining to create a Unified White World superpower!
Puppet (of Bannon) (This from many, me also.)
Lap dog with powder puff tail (Pence) (This from Gail.)
Charlie McCarthy (very far back in time whose voice was provided by ventriloquist Edgar Bergen, son of Swedish immigrants. You choose the ventriloquist for Charlie Trump) (This from Christine McM.)
Sock puppet with Putin's hand in the sock - see PS (this from Hugh Massengill)
Fill social media with these images and who knows what may happen.
Only-NeverInSweden.blogspot.com
Dual citizen US SE
PS-As concerns Putin, Dagens Nyheter 2/3 reports that 2 Swedes work for altRight in the US and with Richard Spencer see the US and Russia joining to create a Unified White World superpower!
3
The only good image I can conjure up from an amalgam of your long past and recent columns replaces Seamus ('member him?) in a crate on top of the car with Trump in a kennel atop the Beast rolling down the highway.
(Sigh) Would that it could be so...
More seriously, comparing Trump to a dog does a disservice...to dogs!
(Sigh) Would that it could be so...
More seriously, comparing Trump to a dog does a disservice...to dogs!
2
Well, at least Pence has bigger hands than Little Donald. Must have been a gift from god.
How many other readers are getting messages from family and friends outside the US about all this? Every times Donald says/does something stupid or antagonistic, "You've Got Mail!" It was bad enough a week or two ago, when our country was simply a laughingstock, but it sure didn't take long for the anger and hatred to show up.
How many other readers are getting messages from family and friends outside the US about all this? Every times Donald says/does something stupid or antagonistic, "You've Got Mail!" It was bad enough a week or two ago, when our country was simply a laughingstock, but it sure didn't take long for the anger and hatred to show up.
1
"But the important thing is that nothing could drive our new president crazier than suggesting he’s just Pence’s pet."
Please Gail, we don't want to make him crazier than he already is.....Oh, I forgot. Trump doesn't read anything. He gets his news from television so go for it, pour it on!
Please Gail, we don't want to make him crazier than he already is.....Oh, I forgot. Trump doesn't read anything. He gets his news from television so go for it, pour it on!
1
Oh, god! At the prayer breakfast Trump even lied about being an Athiest, maybe his one redeeming virtue. Is this the last of many straws? Is this finally the iron clad proof there is no god?
1
Gail,
Please write about something that's NOT Trump. The Times is rapidly becoming an intellectual waste-land and I'm reading the backs of cereal boxes, again.
You've been in Our Fair Metropolis long enough to know that Mr. Trump is just a disco-era loudmouth. There's a reason that he's been on the cover of the Post more often than Murder or Mayhem. President or not, he's not fit for the Times.
Please write about something that's NOT Trump. The Times is rapidly becoming an intellectual waste-land and I'm reading the backs of cereal boxes, again.
You've been in Our Fair Metropolis long enough to know that Mr. Trump is just a disco-era loudmouth. There's a reason that he's been on the cover of the Post more often than Murder or Mayhem. President or not, he's not fit for the Times.
Pence is a cipher who imagines himself as Reagan, another cipher. He hears voices from "God" ordering him to steal people's pensions, and demanding that the mentally ill be free to buy as many weapons as possible.
Never forget, however, that the culprit is Trump, and all his fellow delusionists.
Never forget, however, that the culprit is Trump, and all his fellow delusionists.
2
Dear Ms. Collins,
Ah, the "Leashgate" controversy to accompany your nascent "Stringate" investigation in your last column! Bravo!
Leaving us to wonder if the current, shudder, president is either;
a. "Howdy Doody" re-incarnated with a veritable host of puppeteers (Bannon, Putin, Pence, Priebus, Barron, Dopey, Sneezy, etc.) or
b. A drooling hound of some format (He has the hair of Pekingese, the jowls of a Basset and the temperament of "Cerebus", the three headed dog that guards the gates of hell).
Hence, though a tad late, I suggest that if this "puppet" is actually a "leashed dog" of some sort, then Mr. Trump is a "Pekinbassbus" a rare breed indeed.
Though, frankly, I prefer him as a "puppet" as he has all the basic attributes;
a. A wooden head
b. Limited body movements
c. A mouth that never stops annoying everyone with it's "clattering" something he's been told by his handler that means "governance". The more "clattering", the more "governing", simple, no?
But if your investigation proves canine heritage, so be it.
Please keep us updated and for all of you in reader land, cast your illegal vote now! Is Trump either a "puppet" or is he a "dog"?
Florida is NOT allowed to vote...my contest, my rules...arf, arf, arf!
Ah, the "Leashgate" controversy to accompany your nascent "Stringate" investigation in your last column! Bravo!
Leaving us to wonder if the current, shudder, president is either;
a. "Howdy Doody" re-incarnated with a veritable host of puppeteers (Bannon, Putin, Pence, Priebus, Barron, Dopey, Sneezy, etc.) or
b. A drooling hound of some format (He has the hair of Pekingese, the jowls of a Basset and the temperament of "Cerebus", the three headed dog that guards the gates of hell).
Hence, though a tad late, I suggest that if this "puppet" is actually a "leashed dog" of some sort, then Mr. Trump is a "Pekinbassbus" a rare breed indeed.
Though, frankly, I prefer him as a "puppet" as he has all the basic attributes;
a. A wooden head
b. Limited body movements
c. A mouth that never stops annoying everyone with it's "clattering" something he's been told by his handler that means "governance". The more "clattering", the more "governing", simple, no?
But if your investigation proves canine heritage, so be it.
Please keep us updated and for all of you in reader land, cast your illegal vote now! Is Trump either a "puppet" or is he a "dog"?
Florida is NOT allowed to vote...my contest, my rules...arf, arf, arf!
2
We may have nominees "who don't really know anything....", but we have a large electorate segment who don't really care. As long as "they seem" to be nice guys, why, they're probably fine. Besides they are a lot like "us," and we are nice.
True, we don't know that much either, but how hard can the job be?
The race to the bottom begins at the, er, top, and this administration has gotten a quick start. It shouldn't be too much longer before before they reach their goal. We'll know when they get there, cause we are going down with them.
True, we don't know that much either, but how hard can the job be?
The race to the bottom begins at the, er, top, and this administration has gotten a quick start. It shouldn't be too much longer before before they reach their goal. We'll know when they get there, cause we are going down with them.
1
poem whose time has come around: http://www.antiwar.com/orig/jeffers1.html
My two standard Poodles, both of whom are a lot smarter and mentally balanced than Mr Trump, object. They suggest that a Golden Retriever would better represent Mr Trump. You know -- throw the stick, bring it back; throw the stick, bring it back.
If you think I'm suggesting that Mr Trump suffers from perseveration, you're right. That and several other signs and symptoms of dementia.
If you think I'm suggesting that Mr Trump suffers from perseveration, you're right. That and several other signs and symptoms of dementia.
1
What a horribly nasty insult to poodles everywhere......I demand a recount!
5
A friend told me the real worry of the POTUS leaving office premature is the VP. While the former might be mercurial, one might submit to evangelical sharia law.
Back in 1999, when the world was relatively peaceful and immensely prosperous - we were talking about eliminating the nation's long term debt - the cultural reactionaries said they would sacrifice their financial health to get their candidate to the White House. They got their wish and America got the Great Recession.
America has already forgotten the lesson and blindly faulted the last administration for their plight - they are really the minority since Mrs Clinton have 2.8M votes - when the participants of the current administration were really the main characters to outsource American jobs and foreclose people's house. If the VP got the main house, who know what he would do. A scary prospect indeed.
Back in 1999, when the world was relatively peaceful and immensely prosperous - we were talking about eliminating the nation's long term debt - the cultural reactionaries said they would sacrifice their financial health to get their candidate to the White House. They got their wish and America got the Great Recession.
America has already forgotten the lesson and blindly faulted the last administration for their plight - they are really the minority since Mrs Clinton have 2.8M votes - when the participants of the current administration were really the main characters to outsource American jobs and foreclose people's house. If the VP got the main house, who know what he would do. A scary prospect indeed.
3
Whatever animals they resemble, they're bullies and predators, and they put us all in danger. Republican "loyalty" to this stuff puts us all at risk. Here's a gentle reminder of the dangers we face:
https://library.ecc-platform.org/publications/climate-fragility-risks-gl...
"Climate-Fragility Risks - The Global Perspective"
https://library.ecc-platform.org/publications/climate-fragility-risks-gl...
"Climate-Fragility Risks - The Global Perspective"
16
This could be even more fun than "Romney's dog on the car roof"! Except nothing about Pence's poodle is amusing. Every day Trump wrecks more havoc on this country. Four years of this? Too horrifying to even imagine.
40
And check the "comments" sections on well respected news sources. Trump has more support from that uneducated bunch about to feel the lash of betrayal, if they have enough feelings left to feel anything except their projections.
Trump nominated Cabinet Members and his closest advisors with the sole purpose of turning our Government upside down and inside out and to make it more dysfunctional than we imagined if not completely obsolete. As most of these people are shown to be incompetent over time, likely in short time, and our citizenry realizes what is being taken away from them in the way of civil liberties, access to health care, higher interest rates, educational opportunities, etc., perhaps there will be a collective epiphany that leads to the Democrats winning back the Senate in the midterm elections. But Pence in many ways is Trump's ace up his sleeve, okay, maybe not his ace, perhaps his Queen or Jack. The man calls himself a Christian, but he is just as full of hate as Trump is, not for Muslims, but the LBGTQ community, a group of people that Trump does seem to have some empathy for, well, at least for now.
My poodle Fidelio is deeply upset by an "election" designating Donald Trump as a poodle. He strolls around the house in a dejected state, tail down, pointing out that poodles have always supported democracy. Churchill's poodle Rufus helped Sir Winston guide Britain through World War II. Ike's poodle Gaullie was a mainstay of the presidency. He's not quite as proud of Nixon's poodle, Vicki, but he says that one should not put any poodle on an "enemies list" just because her master does such things. And now this. Fidelio asked me to cancel my subscription over this insult. I declined, speaking firmly on behalf of freedom of the press. I pointed out that Trump doesn't even like poodles, so this is sure to get under his very thin skin. While Fidelio accepts that this may be so, he asks why a European poodle should be a scapedog for American politics. He has been muttering about biased media and unfair coverage. He is convinced that the collies around the corner are laughing at him, and he is quite ashamed to stroll around outside in a city where we have welcomed many refugees. Fidelio proudly notes that Sweden has made room for the most refugees per capita of any nation in the world. He is horrified to think that anyone would link his breed with Donald Trump poor manners, wild Tweets, and lack of breeding. Fidelio's closing statement is simple: "America elected Trump. America must deal with Trump. That's no reason to impeach poodles."
58
A quick hair fix and a nail clip might lift the spirits, maybe?
Trump is a giant among poodles. Watch your step, he twits all over the place.
Trump is a giant among poodles. Watch your step, he twits all over the place.
Pence's poodle, Putin's poodle... do you think if we sent him to the vet to be spade he'd settle down a bit?
38
spayed. If you neuter him, we get Pence. And if you get rid of unchristian Pence, you get Ryan. They're all as bad as each other, and in the tank for the Kochs, Roves, McCarthyites, and all. Oh, except McCarthy didn't like Russia. Trump is in bed with Russian money and that and TV cameras and getting his way are all he knows. He doesn't need knowledge to get his way, just enablers.
2
Put a cone of silence on him and maybe he'll quit Twitting all over the place.
3
Looks like we've got Cheney and George W. all over again--only a lot scarier this time.
39
Our know nothing President has ensured America will never elect another "businessman" for decades.
22
Waiting for their Tea Pot to start whistling. Harding saw to it only a man like Eisenhower could redeem the GOP's coupons. A twenty year drought.
We "elected" a "businessman" in 2000. Just 16 year ago. He left office despised. He's considered easily one of the worst presidents in American history.
Our political memory is very short.
Our political memory is very short.
2
Pence may be holding onto one end of a leash, but Trump is not at the other end. Bannon is the leash-master, who commands all of Trump's yipping and snarling.
I don't think Poodle is the right descriptor. Poodles don't need to take hair growth medicine. Besides, Poodles don't issue Executive orders. I'd rather go with Pence's Pencil - he writes down what Pence tells him to order.
21
Wonderful. Thank you.
11
So did Poodle get the second highest vote count?
20
Pence is really Lucius Malfoy.
15
Thank you, Gail Collins! I love this piece! Thanks for being funny and brave!
18
Gail, I just heard from the Poodle Association of America and they want their reputation as one of the three smartest breeds back.
20
I always thought that Dimitri selected Pence because his name was money,
"See a penny, pick it up and all the day you'll have good luck". Lucky Penny, I think, is far preferable to Bannon, who now has a bold target on his back for dissing the military intelligence chiefs. I hope Bannon has a food taster, because, as we have seen, the Russians prefer deadly plutonium poisoning as their preferred means of eliminating those who have crossed the line. But Gail, you are correct in suggesting that Dimitri himself is the McGuffin in this mees. Pence and Bannon are calling the shots.
"See a penny, pick it up and all the day you'll have good luck". Lucky Penny, I think, is far preferable to Bannon, who now has a bold target on his back for dissing the military intelligence chiefs. I hope Bannon has a food taster, because, as we have seen, the Russians prefer deadly plutonium poisoning as their preferred means of eliminating those who have crossed the line. But Gail, you are correct in suggesting that Dimitri himself is the McGuffin in this mees. Pence and Bannon are calling the shots.
it was obvious from the start that Trump would be the photo-op president. Someone else was going to be running the country. Apparently it's a combination of Mike Pierce and Steve Bannon.
12
Can ANYONE tell this guy to stop POSING like Zoolander anytime a camera is in the room? It's unnerving how he sees himself soley as a TV personality.
1
You left out the Mistress of Propaganda, kellyanne CONway.
1
Were it up to me, my preferred moniker for Trump would be "Pence's Wiener Dog". Seems more appropriate on a few levels.
24
OK, the Germans have taken enough heat for Trump's father's participation in the plot to kill Kennedy. My wiener Lilly approved this appropriation.
I am not telling my intelligent, sensitive therapy dog what has been done to his breed by this careless linking. He refers to himself as Poodle when he speaks, but the similarities end there. Sad that the occupant of the white house doesn't have the character of a dog.
21
It all shows you just how little the Republicans care about government, and their apparent goal of destroying it. Indeed, pick the most unqualified people and put them in charge of the entire department. We saw this under Bush, but this is like Bush on steroids. DT intends to dismantle the government and destroy whatever trust the American people have left in it. Republicans don't see the government as a force for good. The people he's putting in charge our going to ransack our country, and leave the "little folks" with nothing.
20
Unlike Gail Collins, it seems increasingly apparent that it's not really Pence at the end of the DJT poodle's leash. It's Steve Bannon who owns and runs the entire kennel. Bannon is no "Leninist" despite his self-avowals; he is much more devoted to the Machiavellian machinations that are so clearly stated in Chapter XVIII of "The Prince." It's the playbook that Bannon probably rereads on a daily basis, and which undergirds the entire political worldview of this unprecedented malevolent administration.
18
Pence's Poodle and Putin's Puppet - nicely done....
12
I love all dogs. I especially love my Pug, who is so smart that if I forget to put a bit of cheese on his once-in-awhile spaghetti treat, he will promptly scratch at the fridge door. So, I can't get on board with the "dog" labeling. But I keep having this vision of trump as a Strutting Peacock, big head of orange plummage, with Penguin Pence quickly waddling behind, all the while being prodded with Ryan's red pitchfork.
17
Donald is not a peacock. Donald is a duck.
3
Entertaining, but Pence has no leash on Trump nor grasp on objective reality. Pence works with and in some sense for McConnell as they exploit and tolerate Trump... until he becomes a liability. Then Pence steps in and everyone breathes sighs of relief until they realize Pence's agenda is destructively radical.
28
Pence's Pomeranian did win if you don"t count the six million illegal votes for Pence's poodle
44
It's a little known fact that the most preferred dog breed among Senators and Representatives is pugs. While the popular vote went to Pence's Poodle, the Electoral College went for Pence's Pug. I know, it's a weird system but there you have it.
21
What is this? Be unkind to dogs week?
24
I have not been able or care to utter the office and the name of the man holding it together or separately. I have finally decided on calling him "45." It's a fact, and it hasn't seemed to rile his many supporters with whom I work and live. But, with close friends, Pence's Poodle will do nicely. Thanks, Gail and readers!
19
A National PLayer Breakfast would be more fitting, with people who can pay to play sitting at the table! Thank you Mr. Comey!
14
I can only assume/hope that the next logical step for this pooch in Gail-world is the top of Romney's car. Here's hoping.
Donald Trump is now quite psychotic and out of control. He does need to be removed from office now before he starts a war. I don't know what the procedure is to remove him, but whatever it is, it needs to be done.
16
Because the Republicans control the agenda in Congress, to remove him, you would need some patriotic Republicans who care more for America than for lining the pockets of their wealthy donors at the expense of those who work hard every day.
Failing that, the only hope is for a huuuge turnout to wrest control of the Congress from Republicans in 2018.
Failing that, the only hope is for a huuuge turnout to wrest control of the Congress from Republicans in 2018.
5
Although I agree with the sentiment, I've started to think the psychiatric angle is not going to be helpful. I don't think he's psychotic, or having some kind of nervous breakdown, or any advancement of his disorder. To be sure, he is a psychiatric situation, but I'm afraid it's more of a personality disorder (perhaps malignant narcissism with a touch of sociopathy, i.e., complete lack of empathy for other human beings). Which means it is long term, chronic, and almost certainly incurable. It's baked in. Unfortunately, it also means it has not really gotten worse any time lately, and there's not likely to be any more dramatic, explosive "break" than the small ones we see every day.
He appears delusional to a normal person, but that's not because of a psychiatric condition so much as a result of being extremely rich and a life time of being surrounded 24/7 by sycophants who make sure he gets his way every time and never challenge him. He comes across as incapable of accepting reality because he's never been forced to grow up past the tantruming toddler stage; a tantrum has gotten him his way, every time, all his life.
I'm just saying much as I might wish it, I've concluded that removing him for psychiatric impairment is not likely. He's not getting worse - he's always been this way.
He appears delusional to a normal person, but that's not because of a psychiatric condition so much as a result of being extremely rich and a life time of being surrounded 24/7 by sycophants who make sure he gets his way every time and never challenge him. He comes across as incapable of accepting reality because he's never been forced to grow up past the tantruming toddler stage; a tantrum has gotten him his way, every time, all his life.
I'm just saying much as I might wish it, I've concluded that removing him for psychiatric impairment is not likely. He's not getting worse - he's always been this way.
There are only two ways to forcefully remove 45 from office: impeachment and certification of incapacity. His own option would be to resign.
I've been wondering if resignation might be one motivation behind all the executive orders: make it look like straightening out the world, get a few big bills passed through Congress, then wave goodbye? Holy cow! Just imagine what "the brand" would be worth if he left at the half way point and cashed in.
The truth about Trump is that in business he has always skated on thin ice. He has an empire built on puffery, fakery and a ready battalion of lawyers to attack anyone who might attack his flanks. At almost any moment, the empire has threatened to topple over, so being president could be one way to put it on sounder footing and remove the possible deep seated fear that it might all explode into nothing before he passes from earthly concerns.
I've been wondering if resignation might be one motivation behind all the executive orders: make it look like straightening out the world, get a few big bills passed through Congress, then wave goodbye? Holy cow! Just imagine what "the brand" would be worth if he left at the half way point and cashed in.
The truth about Trump is that in business he has always skated on thin ice. He has an empire built on puffery, fakery and a ready battalion of lawyers to attack anyone who might attack his flanks. At almost any moment, the empire has threatened to topple over, so being president could be one way to put it on sounder footing and remove the possible deep seated fear that it might all explode into nothing before he passes from earthly concerns.
4
Sad to see how a newspaper that used to inspire so much
respect as the NYT can go so low.
respect as the NYT can go so low.
1
Considering the source material, I think it's entirely appropriate.
2
Yes, with our new, freshly-minted, and deranged Supreme Leader, the NYTimes, sadly, has had to scoot all the way down to doggie level... Get out your knee pads and get used to it, as soon they'll have to go EVEN LOWER to keep up with Trump's antics during his impeachment proceedings...
1
It looks stupid to have him and others allways in the picture. But it did look stupid also in the case of Biden. Why cant they stand there for themselves?
Pence's Poodle? Or Bannon's Basset? There are too many options to see who has - or should have - the leash.
14
I prefer "Bannon's Bichon Frise."
12
Hi Gail,
Like the column as usual. Please keep pushing the wedge between Burnett and Trump. Remember, Burnett is the one holding all those Apprentice outtakes that if released could sink a Trump ship already beginning to list.
Like the column as usual. Please keep pushing the wedge between Burnett and Trump. Remember, Burnett is the one holding all those Apprentice outtakes that if released could sink a Trump ship already beginning to list.
11
You've got it all wrong. Pence is Francis Underwood in disguise. The first night after being sworn in Pence whispered to his wife, "don't unpack, we won't be staying in this house very long." There's an awful lot of cunning behind that silent smirk of his.
10
I trust Mr. Pence to cast the deciding vote, his educational background is impressive. Let's remember this is the guy who encourages smoking.
Betsy might not know much about public education but she and her family know a lot about buying politicians and their votes. http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_5893bd80e4b0c1284f251c5f?
12
It was not Shamus who Gail was criticizing- it was Mitt. Milan Kundera said that "dogs are the only animals who were not expelled from the Garden of Eden." To call Trump a dog is an insult to all dogs, even if will annoy our thin-skinned president. Can we just call him a Stooge? Pence's Stooge? Bannon's Stooge?
This does the same thing without insulting noble creatures. Trump may be many things, but a noble creature is clearly not one of them.
This does the same thing without insulting noble creatures. Trump may be many things, but a noble creature is clearly not one of them.
8
Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are? Played with fire just one day. Live with Trump all the way. Hillary was so bad, now take Mike Pence instead.
And Frank Underwood also worked his way up from VP. How quaint House of Cards seems now, yet Underwood quotes (Googled of course) also reflect a House of Bannon:
“If you don’t like how the table is set, turn over the table.”
“Shake with your right hand, but hold a rock in the left.”
"Politics is no longer theater, it's show business. So let's put on the best show in town."
Perhaps they just pass the leash around.
“If you don’t like how the table is set, turn over the table.”
“Shake with your right hand, but hold a rock in the left.”
"Politics is no longer theater, it's show business. So let's put on the best show in town."
Perhaps they just pass the leash around.
11
Well the good news is his bark is bigger than his bite. Or, er, um, uh... His bite is barker than his bigly. Oh you know what I mean... Or he means or he's mean... Aw heck, where is that Frederick Douglass guy when we need him? I mean he's still alive and "an example of somebody who’s done an amazing job and is being recognized more and more." (Trump's own learn-Ed words in quotes.) Gail, I have one problem with your article: you shouldn't demean any dog breed by trying to create an analogy to this "President."
7
Gail, in all this gloom and doom, you crack me up!
I'd go for the pomeranian, because my grandma had one with same puffy orange hair, and was very tempermental. I guess you could say he didn't like being challenged.
I'd go for the pomeranian, because my grandma had one with same puffy orange hair, and was very tempermental. I guess you could say he didn't like being challenged.
9
Calling Trump “Pence’s Poodle” in the company of friends or coining the term, say, once in an article, without a spiel why it was chosen, are forgivable. However, dedicating paragraphs to how the term was selected reads merely as an excuse to mock him and isn't responsible journalism or satire so much as frustrated sarcasm. It also makes it easier for his “fake news” crew to howl, “See?”
1
I guess no one mentioned that Donald Trump anagram is Lord Dampnut
9
Pence's Poodle? Does he share custody with Putin?
Pence's Rotwhiner
12
I am sorry Gail and up to now had the greatest respect for you, but I have to tell you it is waning. Can not let you upset my 4-legged family. My elegant Standard Poodle Bello is highly offended by being compared to........ I had to cover his eyes, because he tried to read the NYT but instead decided to rip it apart. I wonder how much he was able to read.
7
Gail, we owned a poodle. Our poodle gave us and our children unwavering affection and loyalty. She became a cherished member of our family. Trump is no poodle.
5
Pence's Poodle. Not bad.
But you haven't convinced me that he really knows how to walk the dog.
But you haven't convinced me that he really knows how to walk the dog.
3
Pence, if he is the one 'confirming' Devos, shame on him for cheating on the education of our future, the students. Irredeemably corrupt.
4
I don't like Betsy DeVos and believe she shouldn't be confirmed but consider that she may be another example of Trump misogyny: put up a series of incompetent, belligerent or malevolent candidates but make the woman the worst so you can eliminate her and get all the male villains into office? Just a thought.
3
If DeVos doesn't get confirmed and is replaced by an old white male billionaire we can start calling it the Old Man Potter cabinet.
And then there is the Yemen raid. Was this a good idea incompetently executed? Or a bad idea incompetently executed? The President seems to be blaming Obama, but Trump ordered it. What is going on?
3
Dear Gail,
I'm disappointed that you are playing the name game. We all lose when the best among us sink to Mr. Trump's level. Our country can survive his or any other presidency, but only if our society is better than he is. So please focus on the issues in your usual hilarious, incisive, and insightful way and leave the name game to [Maureen Dowd?].
I'm disappointed that you are playing the name game. We all lose when the best among us sink to Mr. Trump's level. Our country can survive his or any other presidency, but only if our society is better than he is. So please focus on the issues in your usual hilarious, incisive, and insightful way and leave the name game to [Maureen Dowd?].
1
Pence's Poodle - or Bannon's Bichon Frise? We know who's on the leash - but are not sure who's holding it.
3
We're arranging a memorial service for the victims of the Bowling Green Massacre. I'm sure the liberal press won't cover it.
Mike Pence will be the honored speaker.
Mike Pence will be the honored speaker.
3
I'm telling you - "Dolt 45"
5
Mr. Pence may get to vote on a tie-breaker but he has no control over Trump and Bannon. He is as much an observer as I am.
There are several lobbying groups (disappointingly including members of Congress) who think they can use Trump to meet their single issue agenda and fool themselves by professing allegiance to a "good man" Pence. That is a myth.
There are several lobbying groups (disappointingly including members of Congress) who think they can use Trump to meet their single issue agenda and fool themselves by professing allegiance to a "good man" Pence. That is a myth.
13
This whole Trump thing is fascinating in that it constantly refines in great detail what America is all about. Don't forget that some 60 million voters support this man and some 60 million plus about 5000 voted for Hillary. Express this in running the 100 meters and he and Hillary would be about 0.0001 second apart. In short, America is one sick puppy.
6
Whether it is Pence or Bannon or a combination of both, the oily wolf pack they have assembled to run our government is treasonous!
We have seen them co-opt religion and patriotism for their evil ends. This is a dangerous situation. Remember, "It's the economy, stupid." Well, clearly many who voted for this administration did not expect a bunch of robber barons to take over.
How about that Supreme Court nominee who was a member of a fascist club?
Get rid of unions, the EPA, destroy education, malign immigrants, alienate other nations, take away all control and oversight over Wall Street and big oil, coal and gas, and put our troops in harm's way -the list goes on and on. What they care about is their own enrichment. So, it is all about the bucks.
We need to stand up for our dear country. Those of us who love the U.S.A. must resist.
On February 17, 2017 join the National General Strike. Flex your economic and political power. It is non-violent, it is grassroots, and it is your duty as a patriot!
We have seen them co-opt religion and patriotism for their evil ends. This is a dangerous situation. Remember, "It's the economy, stupid." Well, clearly many who voted for this administration did not expect a bunch of robber barons to take over.
How about that Supreme Court nominee who was a member of a fascist club?
Get rid of unions, the EPA, destroy education, malign immigrants, alienate other nations, take away all control and oversight over Wall Street and big oil, coal and gas, and put our troops in harm's way -the list goes on and on. What they care about is their own enrichment. So, it is all about the bucks.
We need to stand up for our dear country. Those of us who love the U.S.A. must resist.
On February 17, 2017 join the National General Strike. Flex your economic and political power. It is non-violent, it is grassroots, and it is your duty as a patriot!
14
What if millions sent Mike Pence a box of doggie treats and a leash as a treat for his lap dog. It would make Trump foam at the mouth because Pence did not tell him in time to by stock in the doggie treat company.
14
That was the deal. Mike Pence would be in charge of all things domestic and foreign. John Kasich rejected that exact offer from a Trump son. At this point I think Trump has at least two leashes on. One belongs to Pence, the other believe belongs to Bannon.
15
In the picture - Pence has the expression of a parent, looking back at the other parents and thinking "Please forgive me. I'm sorry he's such a ill-mannered child."
10
"Tangled finances"? Let's see The Poodle's taxes. Then we'll see tangled.
20
I eagerly await the day that Pence puts his poodle up on the roof of his car and takes a spin down Pennsylvania Avenue. The fresh air would do him some good, although his hair will be mussed.
13
I wish Mark Burnett would give us those tapes!
15
You know, each Poodle Year equals 7 of ours. Maybe that's why the this presidential term feels like it's going to be so unbelievably long.
8
I don't necessarily mind that Trump being a lap dog, but based on his first two weeks in office, it is clearly evident that he isn't house broken yet.
19
OK, except that it looks to me more like he's Bannon's Beagle.
12
It's really unfair that you malign a wonderful dog breed to paint Trump as Pence's puppet, when the reality is that the emperor trusts no one, but he is eager to put forth any number of courtiers to do his dirty work and this has an appearance of loyal support for his royal highness. Truth is, everyone in the castle is a potential threat and can be dispensed with quicker than a tweet, Pence included.
5
Before I endorse this poodle's name I'd like to know something about the dog's religion. I'm so absolutely for separation of church and state I would abhor affirming a conservative, right-wing dog. Keep dogs out of church and the church out of the pound. We have enough trouble with bishops barking in everyone's back yard .
12
Unfortunately he is really Bannon's poodle.
8
Hillary, Bernie, Elizabeth - which progressive yanks your chain?
1
This would be funny except that Pence is every bit a bad as DJT, and worse on quite a few. Pence is, of course, unhampered by intelligence or curiosity which does make his life simpler. Its hard to say that things would actually be worse with Pence but they'd be no better. His whole focus has been other people's bedrooms and bodies, rather than the economy, health care, justice, or acknowledgment of scientific knowledge.
20
No risk of being rejected for that at all.
Only good ones won't be picked.
Only good ones won't be picked.
And let us all hope Trump doesn't put poor poodle Pence in a carrier and strap it to the roof of the car. .
Holy Moly, Gail- this is going to make the poodle really mad! Maybe he's too busy playing golf this weekend to read much.
4
I kind of like Pence's Potato.
6
Add to Pence's Poodle, Russia's Doodle and I'll go for it. It's the one that will get him out in the end and Pence also if he knew about it and entered into election tampering.
4
We will have to wait and see whether, when Pence hits the road, he straps Trump to the roof of his car. Seamus could use the company.
3
We all could call the DC Animal Control Unit to report a mad dog loose in the White House.
11
Hard to know if I should laugh or cry knowing I live in a world where Betsy DeVos is considered qualified to be Secretary of Education. Take away the billions of dollars and what have you got? A garden variety abject failure.
Pence's pooch has no standards.
Pence's pooch has no standards.
9
Since I gag at speaking the name of POTUS 45, I notice alternative names. Today I came across one that works. Although it isn't one of the puppy names featured here, it fits like a toupee. From Robert Schlesinger at USNews, there is ''President Second Place."
9
I suppose the only question now is when will pence put his troodle in a cage, scrap it on the the roof of the car and hi-ho off on vacation.
5
If there's the remotest possibility of turning something into a dog story, or a dog metaphor, Gail Collins will playfully leap at it.
Must be all those private doggie schools Trump and Pence equate with BetsyDeVos.
4
It doesn't appear that any of these hound's are paper trained as someone is always having to clean up the mess they make daily!
8
Too bad Sepp Blatter is Swiss, or he would have been a perfect choice for Trump's cabinet.
2
I hate to have to correct you, Gail, but you've incorrectly named the "star of the National Prayer Breakfast". It was, of course, "Poodle"! Please be more careful in the future. And thank you for getting back on the gravy train after a four year hiatus. Let's just hope Pence doesn't do something silly like forgetting he crated "Poodle" and left him in the luggage compartment of Air Force One.
2
I agree that the characterization of Vice President Pence is spot-on but quibble that the Biblical allusion is properly 'strait and narrow'.
That Mike Pence is the president's* leash offers us little comfort. In his convention acceptance speech, he told America that he's a "pretty basic guy. I'm a Christian, a conservative and a Republican in that order." But not an American? Theodore Roosevelt ("There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all.") must be rolling over in his grave.
6
When I read the title of the article, I thought "Trump with a Tail" had something to do with Satan worship happening in the basement of the White House. Or perhaps with cabinet nominees playing "pin the tail on the donkey." But who knows what's likely to happen in the next few years...
3
Such an insult to poodles, who are very intelligent. And really to all dogs, who are emblems of protection and fidelity.
4
Can't we arrange for the Donald to become the first human to land on Mars? Of course he would have to do a lot of training, which would keep him out of the Oval Office. I'm sure he would love the publicity and he could take Pence with him, which would put Ryan in the White House. And that's about as good as we can do with this group.
2
You forgot to mention Trump's demeaning description of the great Federick Douglass, spoken at a meeting of black leaders, thereby adding to the maliciousness. Such words could have only come from the nasty mind of Steve Bannon. I suppose Vice-Poodle nodded happily about this too.
You're so right about Pence being only a better organized, more conservative version of the Trump brand. This is terrifying, because, sooner or later, he will be in command.
You're so right about Pence being only a better organized, more conservative version of the Trump brand. This is terrifying, because, sooner or later, he will be in command.
3
You are right about one thing for sure...he's a dog!
1
"Turkey" works too.
Not as bright as most dogs.
Not as bright as most dogs.
1
I had to laugh out loud with the "...our nation's forgotten financial consultants" line. Really, the "forgotten people of America" will truly be forgotten by this crew, but not those consultants, oh no, couldn't have them suffer the way they have under that horrible Obama.
3
Under his stiff Christian smile and outwardly oh so religious facade, lies a Pence who is hardened, who does not treat all humans, who are God's own creations, as equal. In his eyes a Christian (purity test being I owe allegiance to the savior) is worth more than a non believer. Which in itself is against God's wishes who reached for the leper, the infirm, the poor and the forgotten.
5
We need to come up with a better concept. Dogs, with all their fine qualities that make them our best friends, deserve better than serving as a surrogate for Trump.
As the owner of a fine poodle, I wish you'd picked Pence's Pug.
2
That's a great photo of Pence walking Trump. Notice how big Pence's hands are! They're enormous. He curves his fingers a bit, presumably so that Trump won't notice.
2
Just this week Trump has picked fights with Crocodile Dundee and the Terminator. Who's next, Spider-Man? I just hope he tangles next with Raquel Welch. Because if he does, as "Seinfeld" fans well know, he's going down.
It is really difficult to see the bland and platitudinous speaking Pence as a Machiavellian figure. More realistically Trump doesn't like the actual day to day policy making and sees Pence as an acceptable substitute, so he defers. He offered Kasich the same proposition. Trump is actually our President of tweets, photo ops, and privately held business discussions with his children.
2
Howard Stern says being president will be bad for the Poodle-Pres' mental health. Maybe if we all promised to love him if he goes away, he will go away.
1
I'm surprised "Doberman Pencer" wasn't up for consideration.
3
The triumvirate at the helm of our country is BaPenUmp. Bannon writes the executive order, Pence walks it to Trump, who signs it in front of a fawning camera. And then they all walk away for a seeing a movie, whose choice depends on the topic covered in the executive order.
3
Keep up the good work.
2
gail, your best form is the expository essay -- inevitably, your wit shines through even as you build a convincing argument. when you aimlessly keyboard, the humor loses its context and the work strays toward pointlessness. i almost wish you weren't compelled to produce so much copy, so that you could give us nothing but your best, leaving the chitter chatter to those who can do no better.
Pence is Trump's poison pill just a Trump is Pences poodle. Frightening, this could last!
1
I like to think of trump as "Bannon's bow-wow"!
1
I'm of the opinion that the best way to train a dog is lavish praise when he does something good, and a swat on the nose when he's naughty. Consistency is key. I'm against rubbing a dog's nose in his own mess, but - for Pence's Poodle - I'm willing to make an exception.
3
I never though I would say this but I long for Chris Christie!!
1
It's easier to nail Jello than to get Mike Pence or Kellyanne Conway to answer a direct question. They begin every prolix answer with unctuous, smarmy praise, for Donald Trump, before engaging in an attack on the media or a false equivalency connecting whatever Trump faux pas has occurred, disingenuously with Barack Obama. Kellyanne Conway, has revealed herself as a stone cold liar, with her claims about the non existent "Bowling Green massacre".Sean Spicer's false remarks about the raid in Yemen and falsehoods about the Obama administration being responsible for the listing of the 7 banned countries was another lie. Existential questions need to be asked and answered about the serial lying in the cluster of chaos that is the Trump administration.
1
As much as I disagree with Pence on a lot of things, he doesn't seem like he's actually crazy. He was in the US Congress and he was the governor of a state, and both of those institutions continue to exist. So that makes him a lot better than Trump and a lot less scary. So impeaching Trump--if it ever happens--might be an order of magnitude improvement.
Bannon is in charge and he holds the control for the electronic collar he has implanted in the DT's privates. And while we all see a Poodle, Bannon swears it's a Tiger (with very small paws). We'll all be seeing a tiger sooner or later, just give Bannon a little time for his mesmerizing to work through Cambridge Analytica.
those folks who voted for dogs of various kinds should have clenched their teeth and voted for Hillary instead. Thanks for being so funny!
2
I voted for Poodle. My vote actually counted for something. Thank you, Gail, for not using the Electoral College on this.
1
In the midst of incredible sadness and horror since the election, "Pence's Poodle" is the first laugh I've had in two weeks.
I love columns like these, but with Trump they make me uneasy. If Obama's very funny ribbing of Trump inspired him to run for president, I wonder what we can expect from Trump in reaction to the many skewerings that are sure to pop up during his term. I had a flashback to the Twilight Zone episode where the bratty boy would banish anyone who angered him to the "corn field".
As someone with both a poodle and a pom in my family, I have a different take on the analogy: The poodle is really, really smart -- and empathic -- neither quality apparent in Trump. And the pom -- well, she is entitled and quick to tell the poodle what's what. This morning, when I told the poodle his breed will be representing this POTUS, he slunk out of the room to hide in shame under the dining room table -- a response Trump would no doubt dismiss as "weak" and "stupid."
1
Gail -- I didn't know you were conducting a survey on what to call Trump -- I am happy to see that numerous other pug owners nixed the idea of Pence's pug -- thank heavens -- after all --my beloved pug Sasha was the leader of pugs for Hillary!!!! but I must say -- I do not think Trump is Pence's puppet --it is Steve Bannon who is running the show......all of this is of course beyond appalling!!!!!!
1
Pence is with Trump 24/7 like a tail. I do not want to call him Trump's poodle or any other adjective. I know the Republicans congress members are praying for Trump's impeachment , so that they can have President Pence. The problem for them is Bannon who is running the show. Bannon is the most powerful man in America today. Then Jared Kushner, Ivanka and Flynn. Pence and Reince have not that much power or influence on Trump.
1
"Pence's poodle" is an insult to poodles, far too smart a breed to be taxed with Trump. I prefer "Pence's chihuahua" because they yip yip yip all the time and everything about them is so very small.
1
Let us not insult any dog.
2
At least Pence is sensible enough not to drive around Washington with the poodle in a box mounted on top of the family car.
Small dogs bark the loudest. So from now on you should call him Trumpy.
2
So Trump is the Beard, but for whom? Putin, Bannon, or Pence?
2
I would like to hear from Trump supporters their best philosophical and moral defense of the concept that the ends justify the means. Please tell us what precisely those ends are that justify everything coming out of the Republican side of the government right now.
2
I am not sure if Pence is the only one holding the chain. It seems Bannon takes Trump for plenty of walks down the street to relieve himself on the neighbors' lawns.
2
As soon as I saw the heading "Trump With a Tail," it wasn't canines I was thinking about. I was picturing something reddish-orange with a pitchfork and cloven hooves.
3
Well, Pence wags the dog. No surprise. I've noticed that Trump doesn't go anywhere without him.
I haven't hardly seen a photo op he's not in, or a set of stairs Trump's ascending, or a deplaning without the silver gray hair and the pleasant but not enthusiastic face he wears, which he hopes shows support for the President without alienating the GOP Establishment which might make him President - soon.
It's as if Donald needs him near, believing he gains some legitimacy from his mere presence. "See, I'm not nuts, this obviously sane man is here with me."
With Pence whispering in one ear and the Svengali Bannon in the other, his big beautiful brain is constantly filled with ideas - as we have seen in the whirlwind of activity in his first two weeks.
There is no dearth of ideas, based on a mish mash of the alt-right/hyper-Christian ideologues he listens to most closely, but there's little love lost between Bannon/Pence and this tension a big contribution to the schizophrenic "leadership" we have been seeing daily from Trump and friends.
No, the problem is with the ideas themselves. The undisciplined, short cited, uneducated, inexperienced, shallow, unsophisticated, mean-spirited, selfish, one-sided, greedy, unvetted, uncompromising, unconstitutional, immoral and unAmerican ideas.
Ideas that they seek, with any and all power they have, to make reality for millions of people, and the policy of the United States.
The gruesome threesome. The perfect storm for America.
I haven't hardly seen a photo op he's not in, or a set of stairs Trump's ascending, or a deplaning without the silver gray hair and the pleasant but not enthusiastic face he wears, which he hopes shows support for the President without alienating the GOP Establishment which might make him President - soon.
It's as if Donald needs him near, believing he gains some legitimacy from his mere presence. "See, I'm not nuts, this obviously sane man is here with me."
With Pence whispering in one ear and the Svengali Bannon in the other, his big beautiful brain is constantly filled with ideas - as we have seen in the whirlwind of activity in his first two weeks.
There is no dearth of ideas, based on a mish mash of the alt-right/hyper-Christian ideologues he listens to most closely, but there's little love lost between Bannon/Pence and this tension a big contribution to the schizophrenic "leadership" we have been seeing daily from Trump and friends.
No, the problem is with the ideas themselves. The undisciplined, short cited, uneducated, inexperienced, shallow, unsophisticated, mean-spirited, selfish, one-sided, greedy, unvetted, uncompromising, unconstitutional, immoral and unAmerican ideas.
Ideas that they seek, with any and all power they have, to make reality for millions of people, and the policy of the United States.
The gruesome threesome. The perfect storm for America.
2
This is no time for even dark humor, he is too dark for that as well. So seriously, like to call Mr Trump 'The Great Leveller'. Here is a conjured process of reasoning for why call him so.
When Kipling wrote The White Man's Burden, he would have never imagined a gentleman called President Trump. This gentleman, elected by White men, is now their burden. He redefines them to rest of the world. This initial choice of phrase got swept away when even darker, colonial feelings surfaced.
In a vicious way, as an Indian-American I am now happy, that the typical aura of respect, Indians normally have for White man will now go away. Thank Mr. Trump for this clean up job and making colonial complex wither. He is fast levelling the socal playing field for everybody, everywhere.
When Kipling wrote The White Man's Burden, he would have never imagined a gentleman called President Trump. This gentleman, elected by White men, is now their burden. He redefines them to rest of the world. This initial choice of phrase got swept away when even darker, colonial feelings surfaced.
In a vicious way, as an Indian-American I am now happy, that the typical aura of respect, Indians normally have for White man will now go away. Thank Mr. Trump for this clean up job and making colonial complex wither. He is fast levelling the socal playing field for everybody, everywhere.
2
Dog days are here again.
"On Friday, he was directing the government to liberate our financial industry from the heavy boot of regulation that left the nation’s bankers and hedge fund managers living on rice and beans during the Obama era.
One of the goals is to get rid of a pending rule requiring brokers to act in their clients’ “best interests” when they’re giving advice about retirement investments."
On last night's news, I saw a Congresswoman from Trump country jumping for joy for the American people over that executive order. "Sad" as that may be, what is "incredible" is that Trump voters will cheer along with her.
That's hiding in plain sight. How do you combat that?
"On Friday, he was directing the government to liberate our financial industry from the heavy boot of regulation that left the nation’s bankers and hedge fund managers living on rice and beans during the Obama era.
One of the goals is to get rid of a pending rule requiring brokers to act in their clients’ “best interests” when they’re giving advice about retirement investments."
On last night's news, I saw a Congresswoman from Trump country jumping for joy for the American people over that executive order. "Sad" as that may be, what is "incredible" is that Trump voters will cheer along with her.
That's hiding in plain sight. How do you combat that?
2
let it be said: The Pug Community wishes to have nothing to do with either Trump or Pence. This charming, welcoming, friendly breed is known for its devotion to food, sleep, and its aversion to fascist dictators, white supremacists, and right-wing christian nationalists. They also have a long history of feminist sympathies. Though they have generally preferred to keep their politics to themselves, excepting of course those related specifically to dog run issues, the pugs would like to make absolutely clear that any hint, even in jest, of an association between their ancient, dignified, and honorable breed and the current pack of humans involved in this government constitutes a grievous insult.
5
Republicans like their quiet rooms. I picture Mitt and company in high backed, tufted leather chairs. He sips a glass of milk. His concerned colleagues have their single malts. When it was obvious Donald was going to take the nomination, their hope for the best and plan for the worst scenarios required Pence. Of course opposition research had dirt on Donald. Our intelligence services had the intercepts. But, things had become tricky. The dossier needed a few more nuggets of fact. They need to go to the audio & video tape, to credibly take Bannon and Donald down. There's the matter of the frothing, heavily armed masses, so easily swayed by alt-reality, who voted for Donald. This is even more evident now, as the mass-psychosis has hunkered down and the crazies have a taste of power. Any ordinary coup won't do. So, they give Donald enough rope, let him sign his proclamations, let him proclaim himself "the only one who can fix things", soon to be the "only one who will take the blame." Meanwhile the GOP scrambles to gut the safety net, reverse decades of environmental science, and get everything they can in the run up to the inevitable impeachment. Keep in mind that the counter intelligence probe has not ended. Irrefutable links exist between the Trump campaign and Russian operatives. Engage the exit strategy. Donald Trump is the only way a Mike Pence presidency could ever be greeted with a sigh of relief. The men in the quiet room will raise and tap their glasses to that.
41
Wholly agree. Trump is their useful idiot. Once they've gutted all that they've had their eyes on since FDR, they'll jettison him. One properly structured bankruptcy filing and his house of cards I mean global empire comes crashing down.
2
@El Jamon
Thank you writer, though sadly, not of fiction. The bait-and-switch president Pence may come as a surprise to voters whose minority win gave them temporary president Trump.
Thank you writer, though sadly, not of fiction. The bait-and-switch president Pence may come as a surprise to voters whose minority win gave them temporary president Trump.
3
I was really starting to worry that I might not be able to endure four years of this "administration", but this week I realized I probably won't have to. Trump is going to start WWIII before the year is out.
By the way, has anyone ever seen Pence's face move? I don't think the guy is real. After all, robotics has come a long way of late.
By the way, has anyone ever seen Pence's face move? I don't think the guy is real. After all, robotics has come a long way of late.
39
Personally I preferred Pence's Pekinese since the breed originated in China - oh, the irony! As you say, a vote is a vote. The Dear Leader's remarks at the Prayer Breakfast were an embarrassment, but then that's getting to be standard fare.
I have believed all along that The Dear Leader's habit of referring to himself in the 3rd person, by name, is a sign of significant pathology. After the election, I even heard him call himself "the President-elect" on one occasion. He is a sick, sick puppy.
I have believed all along that The Dear Leader's habit of referring to himself in the 3rd person, by name, is a sign of significant pathology. After the election, I even heard him call himself "the President-elect" on one occasion. He is a sick, sick puppy.
69
A rare night of insomnia after watching the Vice-Presidential debate a few months ago, tossing with a sense of foreboding. The Republican Party is finally on show, the Military standing strong behind Pence who looks sinister. It could happen.
But now that French is back a la mode, first with 'Carnage', and a compliment from Trump to Ms. Collins with his 'Avoir du Chien', who is in possession of 'a little bit of dog' or Cachet, rare these days when a man takes off his hat, to describe an elegant, original and witty woman.
An American dog whisperer once confessed that he could manage any canine, with the exception of a huge blonde hairy fido, who kept pouncing on him, oblivious to anything, except the next prank on the object of his short-span attention. Exhaustive and a sight to be seen!
Dogs may be allergic to Trump. He may be afraid of them and this is not uncommon. In the meantime, Trump more isolated by the day, may remember the words of Sophocles. 'Every Man will Fall, who though born a Man, proudly presumes to be a Superman'. He probably did not hear this at school and was in training to be the Bully of our Nation.
But now that French is back a la mode, first with 'Carnage', and a compliment from Trump to Ms. Collins with his 'Avoir du Chien', who is in possession of 'a little bit of dog' or Cachet, rare these days when a man takes off his hat, to describe an elegant, original and witty woman.
An American dog whisperer once confessed that he could manage any canine, with the exception of a huge blonde hairy fido, who kept pouncing on him, oblivious to anything, except the next prank on the object of his short-span attention. Exhaustive and a sight to be seen!
Dogs may be allergic to Trump. He may be afraid of them and this is not uncommon. In the meantime, Trump more isolated by the day, may remember the words of Sophocles. 'Every Man will Fall, who though born a Man, proudly presumes to be a Superman'. He probably did not hear this at school and was in training to be the Bully of our Nation.
15
As much as I really almost can't bring myself to say whatshisname's name, and therefore find myself using cumbersome workarounds such as "the current incumbent of the White House", and despite the obvious advantage to "Pence's Poodle" in that the abbreviation is pee-pee, nevertheless, I don't believe we should sink to the level of using catchy derogatory labels (such as Little Mario or Crooked Hillary) to describe anyone because then we become the very thing we are fighting against.
And, yes, I know that was a run-on sentence, but I am pushing back against the current incumbent's tendency to speak and write in very short, very simple sentences using very tiny words. Vive le resistance!
And, yes, I know that was a run-on sentence, but I am pushing back against the current incumbent's tendency to speak and write in very short, very simple sentences using very tiny words. Vive le resistance!
38
I am excited to find someone who is fighting to stay adult and inspired by the notion that long, complex sentences can be resistance. And I swear this has nothing to do with the fact that both of my dogs are poodle mixes and it is heartbreaking for me that poodle won the vote. I know a vote is a vote (or maybe not anymore in America?) and I know by measure of that beloved cliche "skin in the game" that I have none, but the results of American votes these days are truly depressing me.
4
Actually résistance is feminine - with a cute e
Haven't you seen the hats?
Haven't you seen the hats?
I stick with "President Birther." I don't want anyone to forget that, not ever. That we have elected a President of the United States who started his campaign run by promulgating that atrocious lie, and only after five or so years of saying it over and over again finally got up and said, "OK, he's a citizen, but Hillary Clinton started the whole thing" still astounds me.
I will warn you, however, that when I use that label the Times doesn't print my comment. Let's see if they do today......
I will warn you, however, that when I use that label the Times doesn't print my comment. Let's see if they do today......
2
Your fixation on dogs now that Seamus is a footnote in history is getting a bit threadbare. Dogs do not deserve this abuse.
However, the DeVos debacle may yet have legs. Case in point - a public/charter school financial tale in the area could be Kibble and Bits. Five years ago the public school had to divert some $436,000 in taxpayer funds, last year the invoice was $730,000. And while the local district has only three schools, it must transport area students to more than 50 charter schools. And the local property owners are ... wait for it ... complaining about their ever increasing property taxes and the decreasing quality of public education.
Kind of reminds me of the Roman centurion's plight at the end of the HRE - he was being asked to do more and more with less and less, and was reaching a point where he was expected to do everything with nothing.
But I digress. This new school financing fuzzy math might be a nice subplot and something to supplement your reporting on the Poodle keeper's antics.
However, the DeVos debacle may yet have legs. Case in point - a public/charter school financial tale in the area could be Kibble and Bits. Five years ago the public school had to divert some $436,000 in taxpayer funds, last year the invoice was $730,000. And while the local district has only three schools, it must transport area students to more than 50 charter schools. And the local property owners are ... wait for it ... complaining about their ever increasing property taxes and the decreasing quality of public education.
Kind of reminds me of the Roman centurion's plight at the end of the HRE - he was being asked to do more and more with less and less, and was reaching a point where he was expected to do everything with nothing.
But I digress. This new school financing fuzzy math might be a nice subplot and something to supplement your reporting on the Poodle keeper's antics.
18
You give Pence too much credit. Trump listens to several people. He listens to Putin, because he has to. He listens to Bannon, in part because he wants to be a bad boy, too, and because he is fascinated with totalitarianism. He listens to Pence, because he thinks Pence probably knows something about politics or government or the religious right or, well, he might know something about something.
Trump listens to Ivanka, but for all the wrong reasons. He listens to her husband, Jared Kushner, in part for all those wrong reasons, but also because he respects anyone who makes a lot of money by owning real estate. Donnie Boy and Sleazy Eric don't advise. They take orders. The other two kids don't count, neither do the exes, Ivanka or Marla. Nor does Trump listen to his current ex-wife, Melania.
But most of the time, Trump listens to the voices in his own head. He hears his father, disapproving, sending him off to Military School. he hears Litttle Donald, wanting desperately to be loved. He hears bully Donald, who does not believe in his own worth So he tries to make others seem less worthy. He listens to vengeful Donald, who lashes out like an angry 3 year old. And he listens to narcissist Donald, who tells him that he's the only one who matters - screw everyone else.
Trump listens to Ivanka, but for all the wrong reasons. He listens to her husband, Jared Kushner, in part for all those wrong reasons, but also because he respects anyone who makes a lot of money by owning real estate. Donnie Boy and Sleazy Eric don't advise. They take orders. The other two kids don't count, neither do the exes, Ivanka or Marla. Nor does Trump listen to his current ex-wife, Melania.
But most of the time, Trump listens to the voices in his own head. He hears his father, disapproving, sending him off to Military School. he hears Litttle Donald, wanting desperately to be loved. He hears bully Donald, who does not believe in his own worth So he tries to make others seem less worthy. He listens to vengeful Donald, who lashes out like an angry 3 year old. And he listens to narcissist Donald, who tells him that he's the only one who matters - screw everyone else.
124
As a dog, Trump would qualify as one of the dumbest breeds. according to www.dogster.com, whose political leanings I do not know, here are the characteristics that make a dog dumb with my commentary.
1. Difficulty in training. Trump is a one trick dog; he just barks at everything.
2. Bad Memory. Trump can't remember what he said yesterday.
3. Sense of Direction. Trump seems ok at this; I've heard no rumors of his being found wandering around the White House trying to remember where the Doritos are kept. And he always knows where the cameras are.
4. Inability to distinguish what's real. Not only can Trump not distinguish what is real, he does not care.
5. Ability to Zone Out. I do not think that Trump sits staring at blank walls, but he does fall into a default zone of talking about how wonderful he is when he loses his concentration, which is a pretty common occurrence.
6. Inadaptability to New Situations. Trump can neither adapt to new situations nor in fact recognize that he is in a new situation. Running the country is different than merely marketing his name, but he has not come close to appreciating that yet.
7. Confusion about who's in charge. Bannon? Kushner? Conway? I can see him spinning around like a top trying to find out who is in charge and whom to blame.
You're right Gail, Trump is America's pet dog, but he is one of the dumbest dogs around.
1. Difficulty in training. Trump is a one trick dog; he just barks at everything.
2. Bad Memory. Trump can't remember what he said yesterday.
3. Sense of Direction. Trump seems ok at this; I've heard no rumors of his being found wandering around the White House trying to remember where the Doritos are kept. And he always knows where the cameras are.
4. Inability to distinguish what's real. Not only can Trump not distinguish what is real, he does not care.
5. Ability to Zone Out. I do not think that Trump sits staring at blank walls, but he does fall into a default zone of talking about how wonderful he is when he loses his concentration, which is a pretty common occurrence.
6. Inadaptability to New Situations. Trump can neither adapt to new situations nor in fact recognize that he is in a new situation. Running the country is different than merely marketing his name, but he has not come close to appreciating that yet.
7. Confusion about who's in charge. Bannon? Kushner? Conway? I can see him spinning around like a top trying to find out who is in charge and whom to blame.
You're right Gail, Trump is America's pet dog, but he is one of the dumbest dogs around.
47
Thank you, Gail, but satire can't seem to replace this perpetual sinking feeling with each day and additional news story.
Betsy DeVos is so obviously the antithesis of a leader in American education. Why would any Senator who is awake to her lack of qualifications even hesitate to vote Nay to her appointment? Any senator? This one urgent denial of Trump's outrageous choices will be a vote for the future of our children.
Betsy DeVos is so obviously the antithesis of a leader in American education. Why would any Senator who is awake to her lack of qualifications even hesitate to vote Nay to her appointment? Any senator? This one urgent denial of Trump's outrageous choices will be a vote for the future of our children.
344
Republican politicians don't care about your children. They care about their "jobs".
Re-election is more important to them than your children. Betsy DeVos will be appointed. I hope I am wrong, but if a person like Trump can be elected President,
what makes anyone think that DeVos (strange capitalization) will be rejected. Everyone is afraid of the big bad wolf.
Re-election is more important to them than your children. Betsy DeVos will be appointed. I hope I am wrong, but if a person like Trump can be elected President,
what makes anyone think that DeVos (strange capitalization) will be rejected. Everyone is afraid of the big bad wolf.
3
Maybe it's because, as their children go to private schools, they don't think it will effect them. Selfish people seldom think of others.
2
Because the GOP continues to be full of ideological seditious buffoons.
1
Oh, I was hoping for an absurd designer dog mix--half-Pomeranian and Half-Labrador Retriever: the Pompadour!
88
Good one, Heather. I'd go for a shih poo, but they're just too adorable to be connected with anyone so vile.
1
I'm expecting that poodles will be marching soon in an effort to dispel the notion that they are in any way connected to the Trump administration. My canine - a Springer Spaniel - had been attempting to talk me down repeatedly during the campaign. Now that the horror is official, she just quietly moves away once I launch into a rant (as many as three a day). I can read the question in her eyes: "How is it that this guy got elected? Humans, jeesh!"
48
Gail: you must simply recover, because your columns aren't sharp and funny any more. Of course, I doubt I could write anything funny or sharp about the situation in the White House either.'
As for Pence, here's my rule of thumb: Trump's brain, for what it is, has been hijacked by two men: first, and most important, is Bannon and his white nationalist supremacy views, hatred of Muslims (who he thinks are taking over the world) and "blow up the White House" agenda. Bannon is in charge of foreign policy, immigration, and Muslim Bans.
Second is Pence, but it's a biggie his agenda: anything Christian, particularly if it can be enshrined in law, such as the rollback of the 1953 Johnson Law, likely education, and cultural values expressed in Washington. I'm Pence would have been in favor of anti-LBGT laws, but Ivanka-Jared won out on that one.
Trump knows nothing but says a lot: he parrots Bannon on foreign stuff and Muslim hatred, and Pence on everything else that affects morals, culture, and conservatism.
It's government by ventriloquist. Check who is behind Trump when he's spouting off on something, and behind him will be the "voice." Trump is only his own man when it affects his brand and his desperate ego. All those tweets? Their Donald originals, right down to the anger, jealousy, and spitefulness.
As for Pence, here's my rule of thumb: Trump's brain, for what it is, has been hijacked by two men: first, and most important, is Bannon and his white nationalist supremacy views, hatred of Muslims (who he thinks are taking over the world) and "blow up the White House" agenda. Bannon is in charge of foreign policy, immigration, and Muslim Bans.
Second is Pence, but it's a biggie his agenda: anything Christian, particularly if it can be enshrined in law, such as the rollback of the 1953 Johnson Law, likely education, and cultural values expressed in Washington. I'm Pence would have been in favor of anti-LBGT laws, but Ivanka-Jared won out on that one.
Trump knows nothing but says a lot: he parrots Bannon on foreign stuff and Muslim hatred, and Pence on everything else that affects morals, culture, and conservatism.
It's government by ventriloquist. Check who is behind Trump when he's spouting off on something, and behind him will be the "voice." Trump is only his own man when it affects his brand and his desperate ego. All those tweets? Their Donald originals, right down to the anger, jealousy, and spitefulness.
108
I loved Gail's article it put humor into a very scary situation.
5
I thought Gail's article was right up to par, especially the part about Trump referring to himself as "Trump." Exactly the kind of self-appellation toddlers adopt.
7
Gail's columns not funny and sharp anymore? Come on! I greatly enjoy your comments, Christine, but if you didn't crack a smile at least a couple of times over this column, maybe you are more down than you realize over this pathetically "sad" administration. I get flashes of this realization about myself from time to time.
2
It all makes sense if you see Putin's hand in the Trump sock puppet. Putin wants to destroy and disintegrate and make miserable the American spirit. He did that in Ukraine, and now he is having his way with the US.
The truly awful Congressional Republicans could investigate and toss out Trump, but they are waiting until they have put their own crooks in place, men and women who are allied with the oligarch billionaire class.
Then, and only then, will the Donald be shown the door.
We are being led by con men and haters of the tribe, if the tribe includes non-Christians, women, and those without a white skin.
Hugh Massengill, Eugene Oregon
The truly awful Congressional Republicans could investigate and toss out Trump, but they are waiting until they have put their own crooks in place, men and women who are allied with the oligarch billionaire class.
Then, and only then, will the Donald be shown the door.
We are being led by con men and haters of the tribe, if the tribe includes non-Christians, women, and those without a white skin.
Hugh Massengill, Eugene Oregon
58
America is doomed as long as we have an electoral vote system.
It is time we changed it so that the President is elected solely by majority of casted votes across all 50 states and voting territories.
With a majority vote system, Hillary would be our President now and we all would be much better off.
Begin the process now.
It is time we changed it so that the President is elected solely by majority of casted votes across all 50 states and voting territories.
With a majority vote system, Hillary would be our President now and we all would be much better off.
Begin the process now.
6
elk – Nearly impossible, as Rs currently control 32 state legislatures. Thirty-eight states would need to vote 'yes' to pass an amendment. If Rs gain control in 6 more states they can do whatever they want with the Constitution. One thing they'd never want to do is get rid of the EC, as there are many more Dems than Rs.
They could then also vote to disenfranchise just about any group they choose.
Rs are playing the long game. The rest of us had better get to work on winning, starting at the local level, to prevent them taking over the country (more than they already have).
They could then also vote to disenfranchise just about any group they choose.
Rs are playing the long game. The rest of us had better get to work on winning, starting at the local level, to prevent them taking over the country (more than they already have).
Furthermore, Pence's poodle is not housebroken, and no one seems willing to clean up the mess he is making.
7
I think of Trump as Pence's pot bellied pig, a descendant of wild boars.
12
Don't disparage pigs and boars! 45 is an intergalactic descendant of Jabba the Hutt, but clothed, thank heaven.
3
I'd rather not see Mike Pence referred to at all. Couldn't you just call "45" The Poodle? We'd all still know who it was you were talking about.
3
Moslems pray for virtue; Christians pray for stuff; Trump prays for TV ratings.
17
woof! woof woof!
2
Just as I was getting used to the idea of President Bannon's puppet, you tell me the vote has gone for Pence's Poodle. My choices can't seem to win lately.
It's just really confusing. We've been told that the son-in-law, Kushner, was going to be the one to keep Trump in a zone of reasonableness. Also, Reince Priebus was supposed to keep him on, or near a traditional Republican path. Just lately, Steve Bannon, Trump's constant companion, has been credited as steering Trump to some interesting Executive Orders.Now you bring up Pence.
It's reassuring that Trump has promised transparency in his administration. Has anybody gotten the word yet when that's going to start?
It's just really confusing. We've been told that the son-in-law, Kushner, was going to be the one to keep Trump in a zone of reasonableness. Also, Reince Priebus was supposed to keep him on, or near a traditional Republican path. Just lately, Steve Bannon, Trump's constant companion, has been credited as steering Trump to some interesting Executive Orders.Now you bring up Pence.
It's reassuring that Trump has promised transparency in his administration. Has anybody gotten the word yet when that's going to start?
15
This is a fine and humorous piece, but there are serious issues involved. Consider the 100,000 visas, according to the Washington Post, revoked under the travel ban. Here are 100,000 human stories, each one more compelling than a puff piece about poodles. Time for Gail to take the level of her Op-Ed contributions from the surface to the complex. Humor and irony can still play a part, but with much more bite.
8
There are plenty of "complex" and terrifying articles out there. I read Gail's columns precisely for the humor and irony. Satire can be much more effective than straight doom and gloom reporting. This news junkie has reached the point where I can spend no more than 30 minutes per day reading/watching the current political horror show. Writer like Gail keep me sane.
1
Actually ridicule is perhaps the only way to bring down this over compensating gang who can't shoot straight. Something tells me enough could push the Republican administration over the edge.
Lord and lady know sense and sensibility have failed
Lord and lady know sense and sensibility have failed
1
“I am his Highness' dog at Kew;
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog are you?”
Alexander Pope. (engraved on the collar of a dog he gave to Frederick, Prince of Wales)
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog are you?”
Alexander Pope. (engraved on the collar of a dog he gave to Frederick, Prince of Wales)
11
none of this is remotely funny, not a bit
5
kgeographer Colorado - It is not supposed to be funny. To the contrary using the poodle metaphor is dead serious business as are the others - sock puppet, ventriloquists doll, string puppet - when did we have a president so controlled by his entourage?
2
My poodle said,
woof woof woof woof woof,
making as much sense as Pende's.
woof woof woof woof woof,
making as much sense as Pende's.
6
I disagree with name calling.
2
what about ignorance and corruption?any objection?
4
Aw come on. How about the "Artful Dodger"? He dodged the draft five times and hasn't paid income tax for at least twenty years.
Ummm. Lemme think. Lying Ted? Little Marco? Low-Energy Jeb? The Poopy Puppy Prez is a master at this game, but somehow his supporters get all stuffy and pompous when Gail tries a hand at it?
J
J
5
In an article, "Conflicts of Devos," Center for American Progress has a table that shows how much money Devos paid over the years to the GOP Senators who may vote for her. http://tinyurl.com/hrmw7lp
"Little" Marco got the most. $98,300. So far, a "Yes" vote for Devos. http://tinyurl.com/zxx7t3u
Sen. Toomey of PA got over slightly over $60k, and another "Yes" vote for Devos. Interestingly, some of his constituents are trying to raise as much money as Devos gave him to see if they can buy his vote and persuade him to vote against Devos. Of course, it is just to make a point, as buying votes is not legal. Wink-Wink.
"Straight Talk" McCain didn't do badly, getting slightly over $50K, as did Ohio Senator Portman. 2 more "Yes" votes for Devos.
Pence, who could be casting the tie breaking vote for Devos, also got campaign contributions from Devos. http://tinyurl.com/zxx7t3u
So you get the idea, Gail. Money may not buy you happiness, but it can buy you a cabinet post.
Oh, let's give credit to Sen. Murkowski of Alaska, who got over $43k from Devos, but still found her unqualified to lead the Education Dept.
You already have Rick Perry, who had no clue about what the Energy Dept does, heading that department. Devos would be another one clueless about the Education dept. that she may soon head.
We need a businessman to run the country, they say, but the nation picked an incompetent one who bankrupt a casino, among others. We can't catch a break.
"Little" Marco got the most. $98,300. So far, a "Yes" vote for Devos. http://tinyurl.com/zxx7t3u
Sen. Toomey of PA got over slightly over $60k, and another "Yes" vote for Devos. Interestingly, some of his constituents are trying to raise as much money as Devos gave him to see if they can buy his vote and persuade him to vote against Devos. Of course, it is just to make a point, as buying votes is not legal. Wink-Wink.
"Straight Talk" McCain didn't do badly, getting slightly over $50K, as did Ohio Senator Portman. 2 more "Yes" votes for Devos.
Pence, who could be casting the tie breaking vote for Devos, also got campaign contributions from Devos. http://tinyurl.com/zxx7t3u
So you get the idea, Gail. Money may not buy you happiness, but it can buy you a cabinet post.
Oh, let's give credit to Sen. Murkowski of Alaska, who got over $43k from Devos, but still found her unqualified to lead the Education Dept.
You already have Rick Perry, who had no clue about what the Energy Dept does, heading that department. Devos would be another one clueless about the Education dept. that she may soon head.
We need a businessman to run the country, they say, but the nation picked an incompetent one who bankrupt a casino, among others. We can't catch a break.
35
Colorado's Republican senator got just under 50 grand. He's a cheap date but he's putting out for sure. Despite his ridiculous pose as a moderate conservative who represents the little guys from the eastern Plains, he's perfectly happy to throw their schools in the trash so that they can be replaced with faux christian academies that will ensure that the children who attend them will be completely unprepared to earn a living in a modern economy.
2
Total fraud. Sad. Poodles, losers. If it wasn't for the millions of illegal poodle voters my choice, the proud Mexican hairless would have won in a landslide.
20
Donald is" lapping up" the adoration while keeping his base happy. But he really is Pence's puppet, not just puppy.
8
Delicious. But have you considered Banon as a possibility for 'the man who holds the leash. It seems to me that Banon & Pence are equally sinister & Banon resembles Trump more in being totally outrageous. Whereas Pence is your typical ultra-conservative who only wants to put women who've had abortions in the stocks. (I'm thinking Salem witch trials.)
27
People should think through their cultural references. No one got put in the stocks at Salem; it was a hanging party. I believe the total was 19. Also, there was a guy who had rocks piled on him to make him talk. He didn't, so they kept adding rocks until he died. I guess that was Salem's contribution to "enhanced interrogation techniques."
1
It's astonishing that there had to be a law to compel stock brokers to act in their clients' best interests. It's breathtaking that the people's representatives are throwing out that law. I guess honesty and customer service were just too burdensome for the brokers. Thank God Trump is throwing us to the wolves.
35
If people really want to get to Trump, they should start barking whenever they see him -- and not stop!
2
It's all being done in the name of helping people. He said so himself. His wealthy friends that is.
2
I suspect that a large swath of planet Earth is wondering: how long will the US wait before collectively declaring "enough is enough!"
In just two weeks, Señor Trump has insulted Mexican "bad hombres" and the Mexican military; seven Muslim-majority countries; indigenous people in the Dakotas; refugees; environmentalists; Australians; Europeans; an Austrian-born former California governor; an Acting Attorney General; federal judges; pin-striped State Department diplomats; and a CEO of Uber who belatedly found his conscience. This list is far from exhaustive.
The US is rapidly losing its credibility and moral leadership in the world. Mexicans are urging fellow citizens to boycott US products. China is courting Pacific Rim nations. European nations are speaking up for basic decency, human rights and democracy, ideas that are the foundation of the European Union.
In Latin America we learned the hard way: complacency in the face of authoritarian encroachment leads to the breakdown of democracy.
Advice to US citizens: take to the streets, every day, every weekend, and every month to save your democracy! At some point, the US Congress will either impeach Trump, or summon up the courage to invoke Article 2, Clause 6 of the US Constitution: if the president is unable or unfit to discharge the duties of his "Office ... same shall devolve on the Vice President."
At that time the Poodle would be replaced by the Pence.
In just two weeks, Señor Trump has insulted Mexican "bad hombres" and the Mexican military; seven Muslim-majority countries; indigenous people in the Dakotas; refugees; environmentalists; Australians; Europeans; an Austrian-born former California governor; an Acting Attorney General; federal judges; pin-striped State Department diplomats; and a CEO of Uber who belatedly found his conscience. This list is far from exhaustive.
The US is rapidly losing its credibility and moral leadership in the world. Mexicans are urging fellow citizens to boycott US products. China is courting Pacific Rim nations. European nations are speaking up for basic decency, human rights and democracy, ideas that are the foundation of the European Union.
In Latin America we learned the hard way: complacency in the face of authoritarian encroachment leads to the breakdown of democracy.
Advice to US citizens: take to the streets, every day, every weekend, and every month to save your democracy! At some point, the US Congress will either impeach Trump, or summon up the courage to invoke Article 2, Clause 6 of the US Constitution: if the president is unable or unfit to discharge the duties of his "Office ... same shall devolve on the Vice President."
At that time the Poodle would be replaced by the Pence.
58
Amen, and thank you!
2
How about Old Yeller?
69
Don't even joke! Remember how that ended?
Brilliant! He certainly has the foaming at the mouth part down.
Gail, I'm going to need you to get me through the next four years.
23
It's President Bannon. Not President Pence. One more time: President BANNON.
One of the reasons Trump managed to get elected despite the flood of gaffes, scandals, sins, despicable acts... was that nothing would stick to him.
Whereas in the past presidential ambitions were sunk when John Kerry got branded for his flip flops and Gary Hart was seen on a boat with someone, Trump got away with changing positions in the middle of a sentence and despite admitting on tape (for crying out aloud!) that he sexually assaulted women... why? There were so many scandals coming up that nothing could be pinned on him and make it stick. There was mainly one issue against Hillary (emails) but she lost to the guy who had hundreds of issues.
So, we need to learn better how to pin the tail...
"President Bannon" will drive Trump insane, for it is true. Bannon is the brains and ideology behind his campaign successes and future strategy.
Pence is a doer and is not strategic. Calling him "President Pence" does nothing to Trump, because Trump knows that Pence only does the heavy lifting. Pence is just a work horse, who supports Trump and in return for saving his boss some time and energy gets a bone thrown his way in terms of getting something checked on his social and religious agenda (but only if it helps Trump win votes in the future)
I can't believe that smart people can't figure this out and focus their energies appropriately. Let's stop being cute. No point barking, when one can bite...
One of the reasons Trump managed to get elected despite the flood of gaffes, scandals, sins, despicable acts... was that nothing would stick to him.
Whereas in the past presidential ambitions were sunk when John Kerry got branded for his flip flops and Gary Hart was seen on a boat with someone, Trump got away with changing positions in the middle of a sentence and despite admitting on tape (for crying out aloud!) that he sexually assaulted women... why? There were so many scandals coming up that nothing could be pinned on him and make it stick. There was mainly one issue against Hillary (emails) but she lost to the guy who had hundreds of issues.
So, we need to learn better how to pin the tail...
"President Bannon" will drive Trump insane, for it is true. Bannon is the brains and ideology behind his campaign successes and future strategy.
Pence is a doer and is not strategic. Calling him "President Pence" does nothing to Trump, because Trump knows that Pence only does the heavy lifting. Pence is just a work horse, who supports Trump and in return for saving his boss some time and energy gets a bone thrown his way in terms of getting something checked on his social and religious agenda (but only if it helps Trump win votes in the future)
I can't believe that smart people can't figure this out and focus their energies appropriately. Let's stop being cute. No point barking, when one can bite...
71
I don't understand how a person who has stated he wants to destroy all American institutions can even be allowed in the White House and in on all important decisions. If immigrants have to pass an American values test wouldn't protecting your institutions be a requirement?
33
Pence is very dangerous, look at his past record. If he becomes POTUS it is not going to be fun. I am terrified at the whole group, hardly a sane mind and I am SO sick of Ivanaka et al being in the White House. When did we ever see this before??
3
The people who voted for Trump are the same people who bought a falling down house for $100,000 with a liar loan, put no money into it, watched it puff up in "value", took every cent of that increased "value" to buy a boat and a snowmobile and a new truck to pull them. Then they spent a few vacations in Vegas at some ugly Trump casino and were surprised when someone expected them to repay $300,000 worth of mortgage on their $40,000 salary. "No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people." HL Mencken.
4
The Washington Post had an op-ed piece yesterday in which the writer asked who is doing all the leaking from the White House to journalists?
My guess is Pence and/or Priebus.
KellyAnne Conway is "mellltting!" right before our very eyes. A frightening sight to behold.
My guess is Pence and/or Priebus.
KellyAnne Conway is "mellltting!" right before our very eyes. A frightening sight to behold.
57
She's the Wicked Witch of the Vest -- as in "vested interests".
2
Mom's right. Don't drink from the garden hose.
As a kid, the wicked witch of the west meltdown scene was way too frightening to watch. Not any more. Eyes wide open. Hand me a bucket of water!!!
As a kid, the wicked witch of the west meltdown scene was way too frightening to watch. Not any more. Eyes wide open. Hand me a bucket of water!!!
1
Bannon is holding the leash Gail, not Pence.
767
Indeed...they're just letting Congress think that Pence is holding it!
3
You're right, Max Deitenbeck. On the other hand, President Trump's behavior suggests that he would consider it a privilege and an honor to have the Breitbart Boy guiding him.
1
Indeed - they're just letting Congress THINK that Pence is holding it...
2
45 reads these articles and comments. Tormenting him will only make things worse.
1
I wish a reporter would ask Pence (on camera) what he thought of Trump's performance at the prayer breakfast.
I'd pay money to see a reporter ask Pence about his thoughts on Melania's soft core porn photos, especially the ones of her and another naked woman. Is that Pence's idea of a good Christian with family values?
I'd pay money to see a reporter ask Pence about his thoughts on Melania's soft core porn photos, especially the ones of her and another naked woman. Is that Pence's idea of a good Christian with family values?
12
While Donald Trump is just a simpleton, Mike Pence is Rasputin. Those doe eyes and measured tone hide an evil that would scare Dracula. He would return us to the 1600's and if he could, resurrect the Salem Witch Trials.
His view is simply a white America, and black people were still slaves and immigration was limited to people who believe in Jesus. The rub is, if Jesus were to return tomorrow, Mike Pence would be cast into darkness.
His view is simply a white America, and black people were still slaves and immigration was limited to people who believe in Jesus. The rub is, if Jesus were to return tomorrow, Mike Pence would be cast into darkness.
4
Trump and Pence both have tails along with horns in that they are the spawn of Satan -- both hateful, both hypocrites, both misogynists, homophobes and xenophobes. Please leave dogs out of this, they literally are our best animal friends who give love -- something that neither Pence nor Trump can do.
11
I laughed, Gail, and thank you. Even though it is all so very, very sad and more than a little frightening.
But we have to laugh occasionally, to keep ourselves in a steady state.
The picture could not be more perfect.. Thank you for both the picture and the column.
But we have to laugh occasionally, to keep ourselves in a steady state.
The picture could not be more perfect.. Thank you for both the picture and the column.
4
Hasn't Vladimir Putin earned the prior claim in this name-the-pet competition? Besides, there's a built-in slogan when it comes to Moscow's maned man in D.C.: "Putin's Pup--Lock him up!"
7
BRAVA!! Such a splendid roast!
2
For what it's worth, I voted for "Pence's porcine." But then I got to thinking. I grew up on a farm where we respected our animals, at least until we slit their throats. And frankly they deserve a better memoriam. At least they tasted good.
So I'll agree to "Pence's poodle."
I never did like poodles, anyway.
So I'll agree to "Pence's poodle."
I never did like poodles, anyway.
1
Well, this is a wonderful column as usual. I volunteer at a local animal shelter and spend time either with the small dog play group, or visiting the larger dogs in their kennels. Some of the best dogs in the kennel, all for adoption, are the pit bulls who are the most affectionate and loving dogs. I have come to see dogs as kind, thoughtful and sweet-natured creatures.
Considering the above, it's very difficult to see Donald Trump as any kind of dog, since everything he has done is antithetical to being a thoughtful person intent on delivering the best to the country and its citizens.
Best not to insult dogs.
Considering the above, it's very difficult to see Donald Trump as any kind of dog, since everything he has done is antithetical to being a thoughtful person intent on delivering the best to the country and its citizens.
Best not to insult dogs.
5
Poodles, if not trained correctly, can be really vindictive.
Good to see you unleash a little humor again Gail, someday the nightmare will stop hounding us -but for now we have to train ourselves to hold on, paws to reflect on what is good, play dead, and hope there is a new breed coming.
8
hard,bitter truth filtered through the prism of
brilliant satire! another great column from
Gail Collins. if the quality of her columns
continue,and no reason to believe it won't,
she will be known as the H.L.Mencken of the
Trump administration.
in the words of our president, believe me.
brilliant satire! another great column from
Gail Collins. if the quality of her columns
continue,and no reason to believe it won't,
she will be known as the H.L.Mencken of the
Trump administration.
in the words of our president, believe me.
9
Gail,
You know Pence's poodle is very thin-skinned and he will lash out @ you with 3 AM tweets. Watch for Mike Pence to completely disappear as Drumpf will try to prove he's an alpha dog, not a poodle!
You know Pence's poodle is very thin-skinned and he will lash out @ you with 3 AM tweets. Watch for Mike Pence to completely disappear as Drumpf will try to prove he's an alpha dog, not a poodle!
8
How can Trump be Pence's poodle if he's already Putin's poodle?
7
So can we assume that some day Mike Pence will drive to Canada with Trump strapped to the roof?
13
Trump the Chump had been played - a narcissistic, too busy focused on his combover image, his "size" and his spray tan (pathetic) , to ever recognize that he is just a fool, a Trojan Horse for conniving persons like Bannon and Pence, extremists and racists, who would de-construct democracy, impose their nationalist views, and who could have never even cleared security a mile from the Oval Office, in their wildest dreams, without an unwitting chump to waive them in.
13
Donald J. Trump and his cheerleaders note that Mr. Trump's significance comes from the fact that he is "different." If Mr. Trump is truly different (and he seems to be), then the apparently ground-swell of opponents to his differenced must adopt strategies that are different, too. Given its grandiosity as the newly-minted Greatest Show On Earth, it may be that the Trump phenomenon will self-destruct with properly-applied pressure -- and/or the absence of pressure where pressure is ineffective. One can predict that a line is forming of experts in the fields of psychology, psychiatry and the manipulative arts who are ready to advise, and whose advice should be considered. It is high time to teach some old dogs new tricks.
Doug Giebel
Big Sandy, Montana
Doug Giebel
Big Sandy, Montana
1
Both Pence's Poodle Trump and Rat Terrier Conway have no thoughts of their own. They are opportunist pups frantically sniffing the ground to follow the whims of zealot masters Bannon and Pence.
Sadly, at the end of a hard week, Pence's Poodle Trump and Rat Terrier Conway don't get patted on the head, they get spanked with a rolled up newspaper for screwing up their lines:
Frederick Douglass is ALIVE!
Bowling Green, Kentucky is NOT!
Dang, they realized, they got their lines backwards AGAIN. It was supposed to be the other way around. It's SO HARD to memorize The Idiot's Guide to Being a Great Despot in just a week.
Their tails sink slowly to the floor, discouraged.
Sadly, at the end of a hard week, Pence's Poodle Trump and Rat Terrier Conway don't get patted on the head, they get spanked with a rolled up newspaper for screwing up their lines:
Frederick Douglass is ALIVE!
Bowling Green, Kentucky is NOT!
Dang, they realized, they got their lines backwards AGAIN. It was supposed to be the other way around. It's SO HARD to memorize The Idiot's Guide to Being a Great Despot in just a week.
Their tails sink slowly to the floor, discouraged.
14
I feel reasonably safe in stating that during my lifetime presidents have failed more frequently than they've succeeded. Presidents who have focused on advancing science (NASA, NIH, public universities) or investing in world-class infrastructure (the interstate highway system, FAA, cleaner and more efficient power generation, cleaner air and water) have unquestionably improved the quality of our lives.
Unfortunately, these efforts are always overshadowed by wasteful military spending and pointless wars. Imagine an America that spends 2% of GDP on defense, rather than 3.5%. Imagine an America which avoided wars in Vietnam or Iraq.
We just had a president who focused on the good stuff and did his best to avoid the bad stuff. Naturally, Putin's Pet accuses him of weakness for his inability to invade somebody, anybody.
We know that relatively soon an international situation will arise where a county we don't like (Iran, North Korea, Australia, Mexico) will "threaten American interests." The current guy is incapable of restraint and his party is spineless. So off we go.
Unfortunately, these efforts are always overshadowed by wasteful military spending and pointless wars. Imagine an America that spends 2% of GDP on defense, rather than 3.5%. Imagine an America which avoided wars in Vietnam or Iraq.
We just had a president who focused on the good stuff and did his best to avoid the bad stuff. Naturally, Putin's Pet accuses him of weakness for his inability to invade somebody, anybody.
We know that relatively soon an international situation will arise where a county we don't like (Iran, North Korea, Australia, Mexico) will "threaten American interests." The current guy is incapable of restraint and his party is spineless. So off we go.
40
A good friend of mine mused that Trump is a pig and who knows where Trump and his bunch will take us. But my friend's comment was "here we go, " meaning the same as "off we go," which is stating the obvious that we're in for some kind of ride into an unknown and dangerous territory.
1
While this Pence-Putin poodle tears up the house he's sticking us taxpayers with the bill. We're on the hook to defend Trump against 50 active lawsuits and to protect his holdings. Meanwhile he's funneling campaign funds (from all those earnest supporters) into his business properties. Reminds me of the surreal French film "Baxter" - a dark comedy where the dog gets away with murder.
23
The thing with Trump's presidency is that the days in which he is seen and dealt with as having the prestige and authority that has always been part and parcel of being the president are numbered. This is both in regard to how leaders of other countries will come to view and interact with him, and also in regard to how the various departments within the federal government will learn how to deal with him.
Already from day 1 we have seen how those countries which are not among America's allies have dismissed him as being what he is. For example China referring to him as both arrogant and as being no different than a child "who understands nothing". Iran has just dismissed his statements about them as coming from an inexperienced leader.
And it is only a matter of time till those who officially have always dealt with the US president with respect, our allies and the professionals who work at, and basically lead, federal agencies cease to have any respect for him and will no longer take him seriously.
Therefore while the way in which Trump has been conducting himself has led many to fear that we are looking at 4 years of Trump causing problems with both our allies and those who take their work for the federal government seriously, this will not at all be the case.
Because what Trump has accomplished in this 1st week was to make a total mockery and joke of himself before the whole world. And as a result this is how he will be viewed by all relevant parties for the next 4 years.
Already from day 1 we have seen how those countries which are not among America's allies have dismissed him as being what he is. For example China referring to him as both arrogant and as being no different than a child "who understands nothing". Iran has just dismissed his statements about them as coming from an inexperienced leader.
And it is only a matter of time till those who officially have always dealt with the US president with respect, our allies and the professionals who work at, and basically lead, federal agencies cease to have any respect for him and will no longer take him seriously.
Therefore while the way in which Trump has been conducting himself has led many to fear that we are looking at 4 years of Trump causing problems with both our allies and those who take their work for the federal government seriously, this will not at all be the case.
Because what Trump has accomplished in this 1st week was to make a total mockery and joke of himself before the whole world. And as a result this is how he will be viewed by all relevant parties for the next 4 years.
40
"Plus, she’s a billionaire whose money is in a bewildering stack of holding companies."
Oh, no, not that!
Folks, can't we get a Constitutional amendment codifyingthattheONLY peoplepermitted to run government agencies be aspiring political hacks who owe their exitence to lobbysits for special interests?
Surely, our recent brush with folks of business accomplishment who actually earned their wealth and employ people and have to meet a payroll, is just a recipe for disaster, especially an affront to the Left, whose motto is "No good entitlement left behind!"
So, let us band together to get rid of not just DeVoss, but also an accomplished army-veteran businessman turned entrepreneur who wished to guide not only our army, but also help our veterans, Vincent Viola.
The new Constitutional amendment should read, "Only mediocre bureaucrats dependent on PAC donations permitted in government office, or as permitted by the guardians of our successful children in our very successful public schools, the United Federation of Teachers."
Oh, no, not that!
Folks, can't we get a Constitutional amendment codifyingthattheONLY peoplepermitted to run government agencies be aspiring political hacks who owe their exitence to lobbysits for special interests?
Surely, our recent brush with folks of business accomplishment who actually earned their wealth and employ people and have to meet a payroll, is just a recipe for disaster, especially an affront to the Left, whose motto is "No good entitlement left behind!"
So, let us band together to get rid of not just DeVoss, but also an accomplished army-veteran businessman turned entrepreneur who wished to guide not only our army, but also help our veterans, Vincent Viola.
The new Constitutional amendment should read, "Only mediocre bureaucrats dependent on PAC donations permitted in government office, or as permitted by the guardians of our successful children in our very successful public schools, the United Federation of Teachers."
5
Their parents supported Trump and you blame the public school system? I work in the schools and can tell you his election is a sign of the ongoing dumbing-down of American culture.
2
Betsy has accomplished nothing on her own, with the exception of reducing Michigan's school system to tatters. Her wealth comes from inheritance and/or marriage. She bought her nomination. That may be okay with you, but it's not for the rest of us.
5
Why does it have to be one or the other, either a useless bureaucrat or a useless billionaire?
There are other options.
There are other options.
1
..."Getting rid of a pending rule requiring brokers to act in their clients’ “best interests” when they’re giving advice about retirement investments?" Enabling mentally ill people to purchase firearms? What will these darlings think of next? God love 'em, these the Trumpster and his crazy Republican fans are on a roll.
67
If Trump asked the attendees at The National Prayer Breakfast to pray for a boost in the ratings of "The New Celebrity Apprentice," ("It's been a total disaster.") maybe now Schwarzenegger can return the favor by asking us to pray for Trump's approval ratings after two weeks as President of the United States.
Actually if there were any "true" Christians and/or sane people at that breakfast I expect they were most likely praying that we can avoid Armageddon with our new would-be "Savior in Chief" and his "disciples."
Actually if there were any "true" Christians and/or sane people at that breakfast I expect they were most likely praying that we can avoid Armageddon with our new would-be "Savior in Chief" and his "disciples."
43
Pence's poodle is insane, but Pence is a creep.
How do you call yourself a Christian, but go along with banning Muslims?
Let's not forget that the Poodle's owner, as governor, signed one of the most restrictive abortion laws in the country. Last April, Gov. Pence signed a bill that forbids abortion on the basis of fetal chromosomal abnormalities. The law also banned fetal-tissue donation, requiring any aborted or miscarried fetus to be cremated or buried. It placed restrictions on abortion providers nearly identical to those that the Supreme Court found unconstitutional in Texas.
In 2015 Pence signed a bill that made it ok for Indiana businesses to discriminate against LGBT customers. The backlash against the law was so intense he had to quickly sign a bill amending the legislation, which he claimed had been subject to "mischaracterizations."
Pence already blocked the resettlement of Syrian refugees in Indiana — and illegally tried to cut off federal aid to existing refugees. A federal judge blocked Pence's action, writing that the governor's order "clearly constitutes national origin discrimination" and "in no way directly, or even indirectly, promotes the safety of Indiana citizens."
And, at a time when lawmakers are trying a new approach to drug problems, Pence signed a bill reinstating a mandatory minimum drug sentence, which stripped judges of discretion in drug sentencing.
And he calls his wife Mother.
What terrible creatures -- a deplorable VP and his poodle.
How do you call yourself a Christian, but go along with banning Muslims?
Let's not forget that the Poodle's owner, as governor, signed one of the most restrictive abortion laws in the country. Last April, Gov. Pence signed a bill that forbids abortion on the basis of fetal chromosomal abnormalities. The law also banned fetal-tissue donation, requiring any aborted or miscarried fetus to be cremated or buried. It placed restrictions on abortion providers nearly identical to those that the Supreme Court found unconstitutional in Texas.
In 2015 Pence signed a bill that made it ok for Indiana businesses to discriminate against LGBT customers. The backlash against the law was so intense he had to quickly sign a bill amending the legislation, which he claimed had been subject to "mischaracterizations."
Pence already blocked the resettlement of Syrian refugees in Indiana — and illegally tried to cut off federal aid to existing refugees. A federal judge blocked Pence's action, writing that the governor's order "clearly constitutes national origin discrimination" and "in no way directly, or even indirectly, promotes the safety of Indiana citizens."
And, at a time when lawmakers are trying a new approach to drug problems, Pence signed a bill reinstating a mandatory minimum drug sentence, which stripped judges of discretion in drug sentencing.
And he calls his wife Mother.
What terrible creatures -- a deplorable VP and his poodle.
314
Onward Christian soldiers.
1
Pence is a bobble head.
Ew. I hate that "mother" thing. Ozzie and Harriet didn't even do that. Does she answer?
3
There are two kinds of salespersons (and then all those in between, as Aristotle might have pointed out, had he included salespersons in his panoply of virtues and vices, in the Nicomachean Ethics):
First, there is the kind (pun!) who punches potential customers in the face and tells them what they need to do, to pleaser her or him;
Second, there is the weirdo who politely inquires whom the potential buyer wishes to please, why, and whether they see anything immediately susceptible to fulfil that aim.
First is excess, second is golden mean.
Deficiency would be the ones who just set their stock out by the side of the road and declare forfeit, a class whose number Trump is set to increase by his professionally unconscious behaviour. Chaos theory may seem good, with the fractals sent out by a butterfly wing-flap causing major disturbances on the other side of the world, to Mr. Trump.
But remember, he is a flat-earther, a Kenyan birther, a not-at-all worther, and an undignified chump, an ever-stung "victim", seeking his unquenchable revenge, unmindful of the fact that the Earth is spheroid, that what goes around comes around.
What an unloveable nitwit!
First, there is the kind (pun!) who punches potential customers in the face and tells them what they need to do, to pleaser her or him;
Second, there is the weirdo who politely inquires whom the potential buyer wishes to please, why, and whether they see anything immediately susceptible to fulfil that aim.
First is excess, second is golden mean.
Deficiency would be the ones who just set their stock out by the side of the road and declare forfeit, a class whose number Trump is set to increase by his professionally unconscious behaviour. Chaos theory may seem good, with the fractals sent out by a butterfly wing-flap causing major disturbances on the other side of the world, to Mr. Trump.
But remember, he is a flat-earther, a Kenyan birther, a not-at-all worther, and an undignified chump, an ever-stung "victim", seeking his unquenchable revenge, unmindful of the fact that the Earth is spheroid, that what goes around comes around.
What an unloveable nitwit!
15
England and the United States today is a mixture of Normans and Saxons, both peoples descendants of the Vikings, a predatory people who robbed and murdered for centuries, ravaging the shores of Europe. No other people in the world preserves that old predatory spirit of the Vikings better than the British and the US. Just read and study the story to take it.
In the middle of XIX century they still have colonies on all continents, even in Europe.
In the middle of XIX century they still have colonies on all continents, even in Europe.
8
Estimado Juan,
Sad to say, what you are relating is just a story not history.
The Vikings were no more predatory than the Visigoths, just more successful. Most people in Scandinavia at the time were farmers; the Vikings who occupied and colonized Britain, Normandy (& through Normandy, Sicily) and the Don basin were largely involved in trade not conquest.
Sad to say, what you are relating is just a story not history.
The Vikings were no more predatory than the Visigoths, just more successful. Most people in Scandinavia at the time were farmers; the Vikings who occupied and colonized Britain, Normandy (& through Normandy, Sicily) and the Don basin were largely involved in trade not conquest.
We dunno, Gail - still think he's Putin's Poodle.
Anyway, considering DJT's yuuuuuge admiration for Meryl Streep, we were thinking this fiasco of a presidency should be called the Florence Foster Jenkins regime, due to the obvious parallels with the diva who used her fortune to buy her way onto Carnegie Hall's stage - 'cept in DJT's case, a lot of us knew better than to be sitting in the audience surrounded by applauding GOP'er sycophants, and believe the hook can't drag him offstage soon enough.
Anyway, considering DJT's yuuuuuge admiration for Meryl Streep, we were thinking this fiasco of a presidency should be called the Florence Foster Jenkins regime, due to the obvious parallels with the diva who used her fortune to buy her way onto Carnegie Hall's stage - 'cept in DJT's case, a lot of us knew better than to be sitting in the audience surrounded by applauding GOP'er sycophants, and believe the hook can't drag him offstage soon enough.
32
No, he's Putin's puppet, remember?
2
Anything said about Pence's suitability for high office disturbs me. He was part of a group of people who had every opportunity to realize that Donald Trump would put us through the crisis we're just beginning to experience. I must suppose that he is counting on succeeding him, either through the 2020 election, or an impeachment. It is treacherous and treasonous to put the country at such a risk, in order to put forward a personal agenda.
312
Gail, that won't do. How can you compare our president to a dog? Even if a bad dog, who humps Liberty?! Nooo, I'd say we should restrict all comparisons to our own specie and... the less evolved cousins, the apes! Trump is a bonafide ape, indeed, of a rare variety, with his spectaculos coif of a bouffant that sets him apart! That he grabs the females of the human specie by the crotch is understandable, for sexual urges are common in apes, something any kid knows after visiting the zoo. To his great benefit and that of fellow apes he did surprise the human specie, and became president of a country populated by a majority of humans, thanks to the biblical system and an electoral process that produced a diluvian outcome. Now he was handed an imitation AK-47 that he is playing with to the chagrin of millions; worse, it is said that he has access to the nuclear codes, although that is a kid toy yet undeciphered, to Pence's delight. Should this rare specimen reach a state of fury that is known to suddenly visit the likes of him, there is a special enclosure specially made for our president, where the keepers will retired him, unbeknownst to the armies of his supporters who will be told that he is at Mar-a-Lago playing golf with Putin; a coded language that is to say that he is building Lego Walls - his constituency will understand! For a Christian nation tolerance and forgiveness are indeed signs of Greatness, and so he shall be remembered: The Great Ape!
19
Taxonomic and evolutionary correction:
"...the less evolved cousins..."
Whoa!
"...the [differently] evolved cousins..."
I am no scientist, but!
"...the less evolved cousins..."
Whoa!
"...the [differently] evolved cousins..."
I am no scientist, but!
1
We just need one more Republican with a shred of decency to vote against confirming Betsy DeVos as Secretary of Education, but it won't happen, and education will be handed over to this unqualified, woman whose interest in education is in the online charter schools her family has invested in. I felt hopeful when Senators Collins and Murkowski stepped up to the plate, but not another Republican has spoken a word against DeVos. The fix is in, as it is with all the other odious choices for cabinet positions. The majority in this country are now subject to the tyranny of the minority. Our voices silenced by the archaic electoral college.
Interesting that evangelicals in the end sold their souls to a man they ordinarily would have viewed as evil incarnate. How uplifted they must have been when Trump took the occasion of a Prayer Breakfast to ask them to pray for a "reality" TV show instead of our nation and its citizens.
I don't want to hear a word from any of them ever again about anyone else's character who is running for office. They sold out. They are hypocrites of the first order. They do not have the high moral ground, but as long as they get what they want in the end with women's rights crushed and LGBTQ rights overturned, it will be high fives all around. Pence is their man to direct his puffy-haired poodle to sign the documents.
Interesting that evangelicals in the end sold their souls to a man they ordinarily would have viewed as evil incarnate. How uplifted they must have been when Trump took the occasion of a Prayer Breakfast to ask them to pray for a "reality" TV show instead of our nation and its citizens.
I don't want to hear a word from any of them ever again about anyone else's character who is running for office. They sold out. They are hypocrites of the first order. They do not have the high moral ground, but as long as they get what they want in the end with women's rights crushed and LGBTQ rights overturned, it will be high fives all around. Pence is their man to direct his puffy-haired poodle to sign the documents.
190
When Pence becomes president -- which I expect to happen within the next year or so -- maybe we'll look back to Trump with wistful longing. Both Pence and Trump are reactionaries -- but Pence is a smart, experienced reactionary who can do more longlasting harm to us than the orange buffoon we now call President.
77
Ditto for Ryan who will be made vice president.
28
I agree with your assessment of Pence. On the other hand, he's "relatively" sane: he's driven by a theocratic and authoritarian ideology, which as you say is bad enough, but at least he's not likely to precipitate a nuclear war out of narcissistic neediness.
In other words, we could survive four years of Pence, and come back and repair the damage (unless climate change reaches an irreversible tipping point); in the case of Trump, I'm not so sure.
In other words, we could survive four years of Pence, and come back and repair the damage (unless climate change reaches an irreversible tipping point); in the case of Trump, I'm not so sure.
3
To John.
First things first.
First Trump and then Pence.
For all we know Pence could be another Spiro Agnew with something hidden in his background that will serve to force his resignation.
Let the vetting process begin on Pence ASAP.
Rome wasn't built in a day and events have the habit of unfolding.
Besides do we have any other choice.
It is called national survival.
First things first.
First Trump and then Pence.
For all we know Pence could be another Spiro Agnew with something hidden in his background that will serve to force his resignation.
Let the vetting process begin on Pence ASAP.
Rome wasn't built in a day and events have the habit of unfolding.
Besides do we have any other choice.
It is called national survival.
3
Thusfar everything that The Donald has proposed would benefit right-wing Evangelicals, Islamophobes and/or his fellow CEOs. When does he start working on job creation and relief for the working class? Aren't those the promises that got him elected? I'm guessing that four years from now when unemployment figures have risen above 2008 levels he'll simply repeat that the statistics are rigged and that everyone who claims not to have a job is lying "big time."
94
Stu, Trump doesn't need to worry about 4 years from now. Those people that voted for him fall into at least three groups:
The 1%.
The evangelicals who only voted for Trump because of the Supreme Court vacancy.
And those who have consistently voted against their financial interests.
The first and the third will continue to vote for Trump.
The evangelicals will have their Supreme Court person, so am not sure who they will vote for. Probably Pence.
And by then voter restriction will be its most restrictive and other voters will not have chance nor will their candidates.
The 1%.
The evangelicals who only voted for Trump because of the Supreme Court vacancy.
And those who have consistently voted against their financial interests.
The first and the third will continue to vote for Trump.
The evangelicals will have their Supreme Court person, so am not sure who they will vote for. Probably Pence.
And by then voter restriction will be its most restrictive and other voters will not have chance nor will their candidates.
12
The working class would rather have a powerful Islamophobe in the presidency than have a job. As usual, they didn't vote their interests--they voted their hate.
6
I would just like to point out that poodles are perfectly normal dogs who are frequently maligned because some people think them effeminate. It's a stereotype from bygone days that should have been left in the era of poodle skirts.
26
And they also have small paws...
1
German hunting-dog breed, originally.
3
Poodles are great but that French cut is pretty awful.
Poodles are the second smartest dogs, after border collies, so I think that rules them out.
Poodles are the second smartest dogs, after border collies, so I think that rules them out.
2
I think Trump is more like Bannon's Beagle. He is directing everything coming out of the oval office, including all EOs. Pence is just smiling on the sidelines waiting for Trump to come unglued or get impeached, at which time he will step in and overturn every law that is against his "Christian values" or the desire of the GOP to richly rewarded their very rich friends. At which time the lawsuits, injunctions, marches, waves of calls to legislators and resistance will begin all over again. We're not lying down for this one.
120
The real danger is the unaccountable man who is removing all restraints on the executive. It is hard to believe that the VP is the motive force behind a broad expansion of the CDC's quarantine power, or exempting white nationalists from investigation as potential domestic terrorists. Being unaccountable, he is exceptionally hard to remove. And Congress has not yet awakened, or if they have, their public actions are not yet reflecting it.
9
It is about money. A voucher system allows money to be poured into charter/private schools. This allows for tapping into all the school tax money for the religious schools (which will include Muslin schools - or will there be a law against nonChristians schools?) and for the corporate operated. Money to keep those Christian schools alive what a kind gift - surely evangelicals and Bishops will be pleased. Money will flow to the CEO's or COO's and money will be deducted from the salaries of teachers and other staff. Unions will end and pension and health care so that teachers will live in poverty.
Clearly neither DeVos nor the Republican Party cares about education for all of us. This is a monumental mistake in the 21st century when education is crucial for the individual and our economies.
I wonder, how will the NFL - Republicans like sports! - react when public schools close most of their athletic programs for lack of funds and students? The most expensive athletic program for a school is football. No funds - all going to charter schools - fewer students - no reason to have a football team. Republicans, you may want to talk with the NFL before you impact the flow of players. This institution which uses Roman numerals to highlight the importance of their annual Super game may not like what you intend to do to public education.
Clearly neither DeVos nor the Republican Party cares about education for all of us. This is a monumental mistake in the 21st century when education is crucial for the individual and our economies.
I wonder, how will the NFL - Republicans like sports! - react when public schools close most of their athletic programs for lack of funds and students? The most expensive athletic program for a school is football. No funds - all going to charter schools - fewer students - no reason to have a football team. Republicans, you may want to talk with the NFL before you impact the flow of players. This institution which uses Roman numerals to highlight the importance of their annual Super game may not like what you intend to do to public education.
38
Generally agreed, but if the public university system is any indication, football (which causes permanent brain damage to its participants for the benefit of the fans who like a very 'physical' game) will be the very last expenditure cut.
Who needs math? And, hey, our President either can't or refuses to read, so why should we make kids learn to do it?
And critical thinking is the enemy of the Republican Party, so we know that's going to go.
All those ignorant people a generation hence won't have the educational tools to figure out why the poisoned and irreparably damaged planet is killing them.
And statues of the Great Poodle will smirk down at the victims.
Who needs math? And, hey, our President either can't or refuses to read, so why should we make kids learn to do it?
And critical thinking is the enemy of the Republican Party, so we know that's going to go.
All those ignorant people a generation hence won't have the educational tools to figure out why the poisoned and irreparably damaged planet is killing them.
And statues of the Great Poodle will smirk down at the victims.
Football will be kept. It's biology labs that will need to be cut.
1
Will try again. My comments seem to be getting removed here. I can not find them a couple of minutes later, anyone else having this problem?
Pence is a real smooth spin master. He has an evangelical following that regards him as the second coming. Trump is bombastic and confrontational, using the language of the majority of followers who think he is telling it like it is. He says what they would like to say, tell those immigrant to leave, tell those Chinese to stop stealing our jobs, tell those Germans to quit rigging the money, and so on.
They like this he man talk, they think it makes them sound tough and smart. A large core of Pence's followers are right wing Christians who believe they are entitles to well paying lower skilled jobs. with some tough talk those jobs will suddenly appear, economic principles not withstanding.
After all they deserve them, the voted for them, and those GOP Nabobs will certainly bring them about, after all those stockholders are just leeches taking the money that should be paid to the workers.
And religion, it is the real thing, after all prognostications from 200BC are far more factual than what some liberal economics professor has to say. These are people who believe a rodent can predict the weather better than some liberal scientists. After all isn't all that fake news coming from those over educated liberals.
Well hang on to your wallets folks, fun times are a coming.
Pence is a real smooth spin master. He has an evangelical following that regards him as the second coming. Trump is bombastic and confrontational, using the language of the majority of followers who think he is telling it like it is. He says what they would like to say, tell those immigrant to leave, tell those Chinese to stop stealing our jobs, tell those Germans to quit rigging the money, and so on.
They like this he man talk, they think it makes them sound tough and smart. A large core of Pence's followers are right wing Christians who believe they are entitles to well paying lower skilled jobs. with some tough talk those jobs will suddenly appear, economic principles not withstanding.
After all they deserve them, the voted for them, and those GOP Nabobs will certainly bring them about, after all those stockholders are just leeches taking the money that should be paid to the workers.
And religion, it is the real thing, after all prognostications from 200BC are far more factual than what some liberal economics professor has to say. These are people who believe a rodent can predict the weather better than some liberal scientists. After all isn't all that fake news coming from those over educated liberals.
Well hang on to your wallets folks, fun times are a coming.
50
An issue in the fiduciary requirement that financial advisors put their clients' interests first is this.
A client wants to invest in a mutual fund.
Fund X is a load fund. An investor pays an initial fee of about 8.5% so that if an investor invests $10,000 , he loses $850 immediately and he only really invests $9150.
Where does that $850 go. Part of it goes to the advisor recommending fund X.
Fund X has an expense of about 1% /year.
Fund Y is a no load index fund. There is no charge to invest. A person investing $10,000 invests the full $10,000 instead of $9150 in the case of fund X. Fund Y has an expense of .2% /year.
When you include the effects of the initial load sales charge with fund X and the effects of the yearly management fees, fund Y has better performance than fund X.
But the advisor is compensated for selling fund X but not fund Y.
Which fund do you think the advisor will recommend.
Why do you think Wall Street opposes this fiduciary constraint.
Are they concerned that the client have more opportunities or is the motivation GREED not wanting to give up lucrative compensation for recommending things that are in the advisor’s best interest but not in the client’s best interest.
A client wants to invest in a mutual fund.
Fund X is a load fund. An investor pays an initial fee of about 8.5% so that if an investor invests $10,000 , he loses $850 immediately and he only really invests $9150.
Where does that $850 go. Part of it goes to the advisor recommending fund X.
Fund X has an expense of about 1% /year.
Fund Y is a no load index fund. There is no charge to invest. A person investing $10,000 invests the full $10,000 instead of $9150 in the case of fund X. Fund Y has an expense of .2% /year.
When you include the effects of the initial load sales charge with fund X and the effects of the yearly management fees, fund Y has better performance than fund X.
But the advisor is compensated for selling fund X but not fund Y.
Which fund do you think the advisor will recommend.
Why do you think Wall Street opposes this fiduciary constraint.
Are they concerned that the client have more opportunities or is the motivation GREED not wanting to give up lucrative compensation for recommending things that are in the advisor’s best interest but not in the client’s best interest.
187
Testing, comments seem to be disappearing.
11
Betsy DeVos is an excellent choice for Secretary of Education
That she knows nothing about education and has never taught is irrelevant.
The ONLY thing that matters is that she shares Trump’s desire to reduce spending on public education ,particularly the education of OTHER peoples’ children.
The largest item in the educational budget is teachers’ salaries. The most effective way to reduce teacher salaries is to bust the teachers’ unions.
That is one of DeVos' main goals.
Before the women’s movement job opportunities for women were limited.
Many talented women became teachers.
Being female they could be and were underpaid. That pool of cheap labor has disappeared.
Today if we want to attract and retain good teachers, then teacher salaries [and spending for education] must increase.
But conservatives do not care about public education. They do not send their little darlings to the public schools. Money spent on improving education of OTHER peoples’ children is viewed as wasted money better spent on reducing taxes for the rich.
I consider this conservative position to be sick and disgusting.
But this is what the DeVos nomination is about.
Conservatives claim "throwing" money at education is ineffective.
Instead of spending on Mickey Mouse like Common Core and NCLB spend the money on reducing class size and attracting competent teachers.
Conservatives willingly spend money so their own children have these smaller classes and talented teachers.
That she knows nothing about education and has never taught is irrelevant.
The ONLY thing that matters is that she shares Trump’s desire to reduce spending on public education ,particularly the education of OTHER peoples’ children.
The largest item in the educational budget is teachers’ salaries. The most effective way to reduce teacher salaries is to bust the teachers’ unions.
That is one of DeVos' main goals.
Before the women’s movement job opportunities for women were limited.
Many talented women became teachers.
Being female they could be and were underpaid. That pool of cheap labor has disappeared.
Today if we want to attract and retain good teachers, then teacher salaries [and spending for education] must increase.
But conservatives do not care about public education. They do not send their little darlings to the public schools. Money spent on improving education of OTHER peoples’ children is viewed as wasted money better spent on reducing taxes for the rich.
I consider this conservative position to be sick and disgusting.
But this is what the DeVos nomination is about.
Conservatives claim "throwing" money at education is ineffective.
Instead of spending on Mickey Mouse like Common Core and NCLB spend the money on reducing class size and attracting competent teachers.
Conservatives willingly spend money so their own children have these smaller classes and talented teachers.
287
David, I think what you're saying makes sense for the moneyed urban conservatives, but the motivations are different for rural folks who have lost their factories and voted for Pence's Poodle. Where I grew up in the rural Red (R) middle of Maine, kids ride yellow buses for many miles to get to the consolidated public schools. Charter schools, christian schools, and independent schools are not options for such families. In these places, the fundamentalists who want to control what their children learn choose to homeschool their little angels and teach their alternate facts.
Did you know that dinosaurs never walked the earth, for instance? That the evil genius Satan just put fossils here to trick smart people out of going to heaven? Yup. Can't be filling schoolchildren's innocent little heads with all that monkey malarkey, either, or giving them the false impression that a daddy's sperm is biologically necessary to fertilize a mommy's egg before her little savior can be born, etc. Fundamentalists are outraged that they have to pay tax dollars for other people's kids to be brainwashed into believing all those evil librul ideas.
So, it's no coincidence that the two republican senators with the sense and conscience to oppose DeVos are women from rural states, Maine and Alaska. Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski do very much care about public education and know the dangers of the ideology DeVos would push. Their republican colleagues should listen to them.
Did you know that dinosaurs never walked the earth, for instance? That the evil genius Satan just put fossils here to trick smart people out of going to heaven? Yup. Can't be filling schoolchildren's innocent little heads with all that monkey malarkey, either, or giving them the false impression that a daddy's sperm is biologically necessary to fertilize a mommy's egg before her little savior can be born, etc. Fundamentalists are outraged that they have to pay tax dollars for other people's kids to be brainwashed into believing all those evil librul ideas.
So, it's no coincidence that the two republican senators with the sense and conscience to oppose DeVos are women from rural states, Maine and Alaska. Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski do very much care about public education and know the dangers of the ideology DeVos would push. Their republican colleagues should listen to them.
10
Lee:
You misunderstood my post.
Read the next to the last sentence of my first paragraph.
"I consider this conservative position to be sick and disgusting"
I hope DeVos is denied confirmation.
You misunderstood my post.
Read the next to the last sentence of my first paragraph.
"I consider this conservative position to be sick and disgusting"
I hope DeVos is denied confirmation.
2
leeserannie – Sens Collins & Murkowski only openly decided to vote 'NO' on DeVos after seeing that the Rs would carry the day w/o their votes.
They did this in response to their constituents – good, now they have cover for their next election.
But one more brave Repub needs to vote 'NO' on this nomination.
They did this in response to their constituents – good, now they have cover for their next election.
But one more brave Repub needs to vote 'NO' on this nomination.
6
In retrospect, it appears that Trump was the perfect candidate for the people who actually run this country, the oil companies and the banks. He can bluster, wave his hands around, grimace, and pretend that shoveling even more money to oil companies and banks is a courageous thing to do.
Even our terrible media companies would have had trouble describing Bible thumping Pence and Cruz as anything other than Koch employees, allied with hard right TV preachers. You have to give Trump credit for one thing: he knows how to play the swaggering cowboy, willing to say anything, wreck whatever he feels like that day, and shove his Marx Brothers Cabinet nominations right in our faces. Pence and Cruz would have encountered much more resistance, even from the few not completely bought Republicans left in Congress.
Koch and Exxon are turning out to be smarter than we thought they were. They appeared to be nothing more than greed crazed opportunists, who would tell any lie or kill any creature if it made them a few more dollars.
It turns out that they are also diabolically clever. They can feign horror at the Trump show to credulous reporters, while laughing among themselves about being able to once again control American public opinion.
Times readers are a little sharper, but in a minority. The joke is on us, not the Fox and Rush listeners. And this time the joke is on a direct path to unimaginable horrors, from climate catastrophe and war.
Even our terrible media companies would have had trouble describing Bible thumping Pence and Cruz as anything other than Koch employees, allied with hard right TV preachers. You have to give Trump credit for one thing: he knows how to play the swaggering cowboy, willing to say anything, wreck whatever he feels like that day, and shove his Marx Brothers Cabinet nominations right in our faces. Pence and Cruz would have encountered much more resistance, even from the few not completely bought Republicans left in Congress.
Koch and Exxon are turning out to be smarter than we thought they were. They appeared to be nothing more than greed crazed opportunists, who would tell any lie or kill any creature if it made them a few more dollars.
It turns out that they are also diabolically clever. They can feign horror at the Trump show to credulous reporters, while laughing among themselves about being able to once again control American public opinion.
Times readers are a little sharper, but in a minority. The joke is on us, not the Fox and Rush listeners. And this time the joke is on a direct path to unimaginable horrors, from climate catastrophe and war.
314
Yep. And now Tillerson is "inside" the system. Russia can't wait to ink the $500 g'zillion deal put on hold after the Ukraine's intrusion and Crimea's annexation.
22
The Koch brothers are not pleased with the Trump administration, as a matter of public record.
1
No one is more dangerous than Mike Pence. A former talk show host, he's glib and smooth, appearing rational, but he literally talks to spirits who "guide" him to disastrous, ignorant policies. Bannon is bad but is not born again; no Pence is the one to fear. Trump, the oldest president, is fat, out of shape with a poor diet and has picked a literal demagogue to be a heartbeat away. It is as if Palin with a semi-brain has emerged: just as ignorant but he appears rational = ultimate danger.
Democrats must register everyone they know to vote in 2018 to pull the Senate back.
Democrats must register everyone they know to vote in 2018 to pull the Senate back.
4
Despite the lack of apt alliteration's artful aid, I'm for
* Pence's Shih Tzu.
Happy to go with the vote, but there's endless play here. Pence's Putintoodle? Schnoodle? Oh well.
Anyway, very happy to have humorous Gail Collins back.
* Pence's Shih Tzu.
Happy to go with the vote, but there's endless play here. Pence's Putintoodle? Schnoodle? Oh well.
Anyway, very happy to have humorous Gail Collins back.
53
sorry, didn't mean to insult all those nice dogs. But Trump is a living insult to almost everything.
47
And we're all forgetting that horrible story of Trump causing the death of the horse he bought because he wouldn't pay attention to the trainer's advice, then stiffing the seller. Alibi, it was.
46
The Presidential Putz has had a terrific two weeks.
After performing his Inaugural Stand-Up routine to an empty house on the Washington Mall, Trump made sure that the Easter Bannon left him a freshly minted Executive Order under his pillow each night.
Donald gets fidgety around the White House from his attention-deficit-disorder and becomes easily bored, so the staff let him make a crank call to Australia.
That didn't work out great, so the staff sent him over to the National Prayer Breakfast to pretend to be a Christian for a few hours.
Trump was deeply inspired by all the fake religiosity he witnessed and immediately promised to destroy the separation of church and state which makes America great.
Donald then moved on to deregulating the felons and frauds of Wall St. who form the world's best-dressed organized crime unit.
The criminal bankers feel they have been unjustly maligned for the consumer fraud they committed during the Bush-Cheney wrecking ball years, and they want Trump to make them feel special again.
Trump, fresh off his own massive Trump University consumer fraud payout in November, knows how it feels to be unjustly maligned when all you were doing was simply trying to steal everyone's life savings...like any respectable sociopath.
It would be nice if the First Mannequin Melania were around to distract Donald from wrecking something new, but alas, most news reports say she's frozen in a window somewhere in Trump Tower.
Nobody wants be around this putz.
After performing his Inaugural Stand-Up routine to an empty house on the Washington Mall, Trump made sure that the Easter Bannon left him a freshly minted Executive Order under his pillow each night.
Donald gets fidgety around the White House from his attention-deficit-disorder and becomes easily bored, so the staff let him make a crank call to Australia.
That didn't work out great, so the staff sent him over to the National Prayer Breakfast to pretend to be a Christian for a few hours.
Trump was deeply inspired by all the fake religiosity he witnessed and immediately promised to destroy the separation of church and state which makes America great.
Donald then moved on to deregulating the felons and frauds of Wall St. who form the world's best-dressed organized crime unit.
The criminal bankers feel they have been unjustly maligned for the consumer fraud they committed during the Bush-Cheney wrecking ball years, and they want Trump to make them feel special again.
Trump, fresh off his own massive Trump University consumer fraud payout in November, knows how it feels to be unjustly maligned when all you were doing was simply trying to steal everyone's life savings...like any respectable sociopath.
It would be nice if the First Mannequin Melania were around to distract Donald from wrecking something new, but alas, most news reports say she's frozen in a window somewhere in Trump Tower.
Nobody wants be around this putz.
1112
Wow...great writing. I enjoyed every turn of phrase.
7
Bless you, Socrates. NYT should pay you.
5
Mannequin Melania is...not frozen in situ. She is too busy suing tabloid gossipers and those who repeat THE gossip, claiming her reputation is at stake. She is much too busy with her lawyers to set up or organize the office of the First Lady. It is s-l-o-w-l-y coming together . Either she does not fully grasp the meaning of the office, or she just simply does not want to do it!!! Fine to stay behind for Barron's sake but the office should have been up and running on day one . Not being an American Woman might have something to do with it? I don't know. Maybe she just does not care.
5
I can't laugh at the dog jokes anymore.
We have a new CIA director who thinks waterboarding isn't torture and an assistant director who actually tortured. (And destroyed the evidence.) Children who have been raped can't get their asylum cases heard and my financial advisor no longer owes me any decency or fairness when investing my retirement money.
Humor no longer satisfies.
We have a new CIA director who thinks waterboarding isn't torture and an assistant director who actually tortured. (And destroyed the evidence.) Children who have been raped can't get their asylum cases heard and my financial advisor no longer owes me any decency or fairness when investing my retirement money.
Humor no longer satisfies.
548
But it is all we have!?
Truly depressing days since Nov. 8, 2016.
3
I suppose that if I desperately wanted Trump out but was petrified at the prospect of a Pence presidency and the replacement of “Hail to the Chief!” with “Onward Cristian Soldiers!”, one tactic I’d consider would be driving a wedge between the two. If Trump were to shut Pence out, and Pence’s days thereafter were filled with nothing but re-runs of HBO’s “Veep”, then he might resign in disgust and Trump might select someone more acceptable – at which point Gail could focus more directly on convincing Trump to conclude that the job wasn’t worth the aggravation.
It’s a mite serpentine for a workable plan, and be careful of what you wish for …
Trump could nominate Steve Bannon as his new VP, get him confirmed, then resign. This could have Gail positioned outside the White House listening to maniacal laughter as new tax after new tax was levied on MSM news purveyors, with the justifiable admonition to replay Joe Biden’s statement that payment of taxes is a “patriotic duty”.
Gail also is now fully invested in the liberal resolve to concentrate ALL leftish forces to nix Betsy DeVos’s confirmation as EdSec. Schumer obviously has concluded that he’s going to lose on EVERYONE else, including Gorsuch, so he’d better have ONE win or he may as well go back to NY statehouse politics. But I’d caution Gail about that: if Schumer misses on this, he may as well stitch “LOSER!” on his forehead for the remainder of his days. Nobody here wants that for Gail, even by association.
It’s a mite serpentine for a workable plan, and be careful of what you wish for …
Trump could nominate Steve Bannon as his new VP, get him confirmed, then resign. This could have Gail positioned outside the White House listening to maniacal laughter as new tax after new tax was levied on MSM news purveyors, with the justifiable admonition to replay Joe Biden’s statement that payment of taxes is a “patriotic duty”.
Gail also is now fully invested in the liberal resolve to concentrate ALL leftish forces to nix Betsy DeVos’s confirmation as EdSec. Schumer obviously has concluded that he’s going to lose on EVERYONE else, including Gorsuch, so he’d better have ONE win or he may as well go back to NY statehouse politics. But I’d caution Gail about that: if Schumer misses on this, he may as well stitch “LOSER!” on his forehead for the remainder of his days. Nobody here wants that for Gail, even by association.
8
It must be the poison in all that hypocrisy, you're losing it. Time for a looong vacation for you! Some actual sun, you know, that outdoors stuff?
77
I have no idea what you meant by anything in this comment. Considering that Betsy DeVos has helped turn her home state into a Charter School disaster (no requirements - anyone can start one; no standards = no such thing as failure), it's no surprise that even Republicans are finding it difficult to vote for her. And she also stated that she thinks it should be up to the states to decide if they want to require their schools to educate the disabled.
54
Stephanie:
Not surprised by your inability to comprehend even simple satire. Must be the Smelt caught in your CA ears.
Susan:
You don't lose me even on vacations -- I post from everywhere. I enraged the unchained, potted liberati in this forum from a commercial sailing yacht in the middle of the Aegean. Ain't technology cool?
Not surprised by your inability to comprehend even simple satire. Must be the Smelt caught in your CA ears.
Susan:
You don't lose me even on vacations -- I post from everywhere. I enraged the unchained, potted liberati in this forum from a commercial sailing yacht in the middle of the Aegean. Ain't technology cool?
One thing for sure: financial advisors were way better off back in the days when most people thought they were looking out for them.
First, President Obama creates a rule to require what most everyone assumed was already required. Then Trump says no way, you pay those advisors to manage your money in a way that is suitable (to them).
Confusing, I know. In the meantime, you might want to consider managing your own money. That's what I did a few years ago after I asked a potential advisor how he made his money.
First, President Obama creates a rule to require what most everyone assumed was already required. Then Trump says no way, you pay those advisors to manage your money in a way that is suitable (to them).
Confusing, I know. In the meantime, you might want to consider managing your own money. That's what I did a few years ago after I asked a potential advisor how he made his money.
343
A financial advisor's best advice to a client would be to drop him or her and put the money in an index fund:
www.cnbc.com/amp/2015/06/26/index-funds-trounce-actively-managed-funds-s...
www.cnbc.com/amp/2015/06/26/index-funds-trounce-actively-managed-funds-s...
2
This happened to my mom, just a couple of years after my dad died. One of his "friends" was the manager of his estate, and by the time Mom and my savvy brother realized he was shoving her (relatively small) inheritance into funds with MAMMOTH members, it was nearly too late. He had managed to lose half of her money, which she needed to support my brother and me. Shameful, but legal.
3
To the tune of "Bingo."
Pence had a dog
And the dog loved him
And Trump was his name
T-R-U-M-P
T-R-U-M-P
T-R-U-M-P
And Trump was his name.
Pence had a dog
And the dog loved him
And Trump was his name
T-R-U-M-P
T-R-U-M-P
T-R-U-M-P
And Trump was his name.
84
Sorry Gail, but IMHO you missed the mark on this one. The canines you mentioned all have Visa issues. You know what the Big Guy thinks about Visa types!
-The origin of the poodle was Germany.
-The Pomeranian is named for it's home in the Pomerania region of Germany and Poland.
-Pugs were brought from China to Europe, then here.
So we need a native American animal. The Grizzly Bear will work especially since it's the lead in to DeVos' greatest qualification as Sec of Education. Remember when she brought up the topic?
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/betsy-devos-schools-might-need-guns-...
So Trump will be Pence's lap Bear, and with DeVos in charge of public education we will never have to worry about school performance again! Daily second grade, gun battles will relieve us of our concerns about academia! And, Betsy D. promised us that public funds will be wisely used in private hands. Especially hers and her friend's.
-The origin of the poodle was Germany.
-The Pomeranian is named for it's home in the Pomerania region of Germany and Poland.
-Pugs were brought from China to Europe, then here.
So we need a native American animal. The Grizzly Bear will work especially since it's the lead in to DeVos' greatest qualification as Sec of Education. Remember when she brought up the topic?
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/betsy-devos-schools-might-need-guns-...
So Trump will be Pence's lap Bear, and with DeVos in charge of public education we will never have to worry about school performance again! Daily second grade, gun battles will relieve us of our concerns about academia! And, Betsy D. promised us that public funds will be wisely used in private hands. Especially hers and her friend's.
83
How about considering the all-American beaver? Trump can be Pence's beaver!
6
No, We need a Chesapeake Bay retriever. They are native to the US and we can call on them to retrieve our national pride from the jaws of the poodle when he has finished using the Constitution as his favorite chew-toy.
2
Perhaps the Turkey would be a better choice. It is native to North America. As president Trump could pardon himself for all the stupid things he has done over the year. And we will all be thankful when he is gone.
.
.
Gail, it is interesting, as you point out near the bottom of this informative column: Trump refers to himself as "Trump". Not only that, but the Vice President, quite famously, has a dog.
When was another Vice President associated with a dog? Bob Dole and his pup Leader didn't make it to President of the Senate. Harry Truman said, "If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog." LBJ had Him and Her, although I don't know if they entered his life on forepaws before he was President.
But what I'm looking for is someone who referred to himself in the third person, and was also a Vice President famously associated with a dog. Bob Dole did talk a lot about "Bob Dole", but he didn't make it to VP. Let's see ...
Ah!! I have it!
1962: "Think of what you'll be missing. You won't have Nixon to kick around any more."
1952: "And the kids, just like any kids, love the dog." Nixon even pulled a Trump by buying airtime to make his case. Nixon and Trump both ran for President while residing in Manhattan.
And of course, Nixon, like Trump, viewed the press as the opposing party.
Think of what you'll be missing, Gail, if Pence's Poodle takes a powder!
.
Gail, it is interesting, as you point out near the bottom of this informative column: Trump refers to himself as "Trump". Not only that, but the Vice President, quite famously, has a dog.
When was another Vice President associated with a dog? Bob Dole and his pup Leader didn't make it to President of the Senate. Harry Truman said, "If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog." LBJ had Him and Her, although I don't know if they entered his life on forepaws before he was President.
But what I'm looking for is someone who referred to himself in the third person, and was also a Vice President famously associated with a dog. Bob Dole did talk a lot about "Bob Dole", but he didn't make it to VP. Let's see ...
Ah!! I have it!
1962: "Think of what you'll be missing. You won't have Nixon to kick around any more."
1952: "And the kids, just like any kids, love the dog." Nixon even pulled a Trump by buying airtime to make his case. Nixon and Trump both ran for President while residing in Manhattan.
And of course, Nixon, like Trump, viewed the press as the opposing party.
Think of what you'll be missing, Gail, if Pence's Poodle takes a powder!
55
Does everyone know that every president since at least 1953 has had a pet in the White House? Not Trump. Well, not an animal other than a human being (so to speak.)
This alone, should be reason enough to impeach him.
This alone, should be reason enough to impeach him.
3
Wait, I thought Bannon was the President, now it's Pence? Maybe the White House staff could put a calendar on the POTUS page telling us who's really in charge that day. I just hope I am out of the country on Michael Flynn's day.
But there is a sure fire way that you can tell who is really in charge in the Trump Administration. It's the last person the Donald talked to.
Maybe it was Flynn's idea to name Ted Malloch as US ambassador to the EU. Ted has the same talent as Trump for poisonous language. He recently compared the EU to the former Soviet Union, before calling for more EU countries to hold Brexit type referendums. No wonder he got the job. I think Malloch should first be assigned as ambassador to North Korea for training, then he'd have a better feel for the real Soviet Union, that one that slaughtered millions in labor camps and famines.
Maybe we should let Putin pick our Cabinet, wait a minute, maybe he already has...
But there is a sure fire way that you can tell who is really in charge in the Trump Administration. It's the last person the Donald talked to.
Maybe it was Flynn's idea to name Ted Malloch as US ambassador to the EU. Ted has the same talent as Trump for poisonous language. He recently compared the EU to the former Soviet Union, before calling for more EU countries to hold Brexit type referendums. No wonder he got the job. I think Malloch should first be assigned as ambassador to North Korea for training, then he'd have a better feel for the real Soviet Union, that one that slaughtered millions in labor camps and famines.
Maybe we should let Putin pick our Cabinet, wait a minute, maybe he already has...
574
Malloch? That's his name? Isn't that the name of a devil from the Old Testament?
Trump keeps repeating himself.
Trump keeps repeating himself.
4
Please remember that while Ms. De Vos' confirmation process was tanking, Kellyanne Conway, in true Trump style, created a distraction by creating a "Bowling Green massacre," which, she noted, had not been covered. That's because it never happened.
Nevertheless, she did Trump proud by contriving a crisis rather than being overwhelmed with the political crisis out of their control. And, as a bonus, untold Trump supporters will have heard the lie but not the retraction.
Thus, another lie has become real.
Nevertheless, she did Trump proud by contriving a crisis rather than being overwhelmed with the political crisis out of their control. And, as a bonus, untold Trump supporters will have heard the lie but not the retraction.
Thus, another lie has become real.
666
Made up massacre! Straight from the screenplay of "Wag the Dog" (there it was a phony war with Albania).
Life imitating art. (First "Being There", then "Wag the Dog". Hopefully not "Independence Day".
Life imitating art. (First "Being There", then "Wag the Dog". Hopefully not "Independence Day".
3
Conway was just illustrating what she meant by alternative facts. Now I get it. She meant lies.
7
I don't know what kind of religion Mike Pence practices, but it's not based on anything remotely Judeo-Christian. If it were, he would quickly remove himself from Donald Trump's circle.
844
The loudest and most fervent 'Christians' tend, in my experience, to be the least Christ-like and the most ignorant of the actual teachings.
I guess there isn't as much money in tolerance, love, acceptance, helping the poor, etc.
I guess there isn't as much money in tolerance, love, acceptance, helping the poor, etc.
526
It's the religion of big fat hypocrisy - and selling his soul to the devil for some power.
35
I like to simplify the way that Pence's sect of "Christianity" operates is that they operate with a very thin Bible, one that has only 2 verses.
1. Thou shalt not have an abortion
2. Gay Marriage should be prohibited.
These Christians mostly are past the age of childbearing or are male, who cannot ever be pregnant.
1. Thou shalt not have an abortion
2. Gay Marriage should be prohibited.
These Christians mostly are past the age of childbearing or are male, who cannot ever be pregnant.
42
No doubt those Evangelicals and Congressional Republicans who supported Trump's indefensible candidacy did so for the second name on the ticket. And now they are expecting to make good on their investments. If Trump can't yet be shoved aside completely, Pence has to pay up as the puppeteer.
52
Hi Gail,
Thanks for updating us on the vote for a nickname for Trump. You know, poodles as dogs are highly intelligent, so that canine characteristic doesn't fit for Trump at all. But in the political historical context--Tony Blair was indeed Bush's poodle--it fits well. I'm looking forward to your poodle columns!
Thanks for updating us on the vote for a nickname for Trump. You know, poodles as dogs are highly intelligent, so that canine characteristic doesn't fit for Trump at all. But in the political historical context--Tony Blair was indeed Bush's poodle--it fits well. I'm looking forward to your poodle columns!
46
Unfortunately, Trump is intelligent. How else could a man with narcissistic personality disorder, who believes that the entire world revolves around him, get the entire world to revolve around him?
3
I do love the pathetic image of our lapdog Prezident (the z makes it Russian).
But if it were just an internet naming contest, I think I would have to go for Trumpy McTrumpface, because it sure seems he won his votes the same way Boaty McBoatface did:
People couldn't be bothered to take their opportunity to vote seriously.
But if it were just an internet naming contest, I think I would have to go for Trumpy McTrumpface, because it sure seems he won his votes the same way Boaty McBoatface did:
People couldn't be bothered to take their opportunity to vote seriously.
139
Now, if only we could get him to take a road trip with Mitt.
376
That's rich! In every way rich!
6
Hey, wait a minute. I thought Trump was Putin's Poodle. Pence's too?
Can a normal poodle have two masters? Ah, forgive me. Not a normal poodle.
Can a normal poodle have two masters? Ah, forgive me. Not a normal poodle.
265
Big bugs have little bugs to bite 'em
Little bugs have littler bugs
And so ad infinitum
Little bugs have littler bugs
And so ad infinitum
27
"Servant of Two Masters"...Trump as Truffaldino (replace stomach with trump's unmodified Id:
"Beatrice's servant, the exceptionally quirky and comical Truffaldino, is the central figure of this play. He is always complaining of an empty stomach, and always trying to satisfy his hunger by eating everything and anything in sight. When the opportunity presents itself to be servant to another master (Florindo, as it happens) he sees the opportunity for an extra dinner."
"Beatrice's servant, the exceptionally quirky and comical Truffaldino, is the central figure of this play. He is always complaining of an empty stomach, and always trying to satisfy his hunger by eating everything and anything in sight. When the opportunity presents itself to be servant to another master (Florindo, as it happens) he sees the opportunity for an extra dinner."
5
Putence's poodle
5
Pence's Poodle? More like Bannon's Bulldog.
80
To Sherri Vance ~ Exactly my thought, Bannon's Bulldog!!
2
If only any of this were funny.
516
DW - Gail's ripping Trump to pieces in a funny way. We need this kind of funny to keep us from losing our minds over the next four years!
11
Gallows humor should be a bit blacker, I suppose.
4
Don't take the humor away, please. It's all I have to sustain me between letters written to my Senators, who are undoubtedly sick of hearing from me.
3
Dear Gail,
Lovely column, as usual. I think calling the President a Dog is a fitting rebuke to his comment about your appearance back in the day when we still thought the man was a joke. Is he sort of riding out his tenure strapped to the figurative roof of Pence's car, hair streaming in the wind and saliva spraying a slippery wake down the highway behind him like a snail? Or would that be taking mixing metaphors and taking the war of words just a tad over the top?
Lovely column, as usual. I think calling the President a Dog is a fitting rebuke to his comment about your appearance back in the day when we still thought the man was a joke. Is he sort of riding out his tenure strapped to the figurative roof of Pence's car, hair streaming in the wind and saliva spraying a slippery wake down the highway behind him like a snail? Or would that be taking mixing metaphors and taking the war of words just a tad over the top?
60
Gail,
I think this is going to be better than Romney's 'dog on the car roof'.
Please keep it up. Maybe we should start sending kibble to the White House? Sorta like The Beatles and jellybeans?
Bob
I think this is going to be better than Romney's 'dog on the car roof'.
Please keep it up. Maybe we should start sending kibble to the White House? Sorta like The Beatles and jellybeans?
Bob
132
Nothing can beat Romney's dog on the car. Ever.
7
Bob, the kibble idea is fabulous! I gotta get some this afternoon.
2
But wait, "the votes are in" ... Gail, you're seriously out of touch. Get with the program, this is 2017. The votes are what you want them to be. You're in charge, yu get to decide. Just declare the votes you don't like to be the work of "aliens", illegal, Syrian, green with bug eyes, whatever. It doesn't matter. The you can declare Pence's Pomeranian to be the people's choice, and by the way, don't forget to mention that million, maybe million and a half people voted for it, a historic, really amazing turnout for a Pomeranian. Got it? Good, you'll do well in the new age of alternate facts.
160
Gail, Somewhere among our rules requiring good manners, there hopefully lurks a law forbidding Pence from driving into Canada with a pet poodle on the roof, so OK yes, by all means stick with the appelation, or we ourselves may have to build that wall further north, and make you-know-who, south of Canada, pay for it. Oh, wait a minute... poodles are regarded as intelligent... on the other hand the word evidently means "to splash about".
Or perhaps it implies a noisome puddle.
Can't wait to hear about the looming phone call north...
Or perhaps it implies a noisome puddle.
Can't wait to hear about the looming phone call north...
28
As Pence's Poodle goes low, Gail goes high. Pure sterling.
42
To Mike Pence: I'm not Eve and you're not God."
148
How can Pence call himself "Christian first" and go along with Trump using a prayer breakfast to ask for divine intervention with Arnold's hosting performance? Or for any of Trump's innumerable offenses to faith, for that matter?
Earthly powers and rewards obviously mean more to Pence than any religion.
Earthly powers and rewards obviously mean more to Pence than any religion.
339
The glimmers of Pence's behind-the-curtains motions should give us all pause about whether we really want Trump gone.
Pence is certainly more emotionally stable than Trump, but he will use that focus to push through a far-right agenda. With Pence's history in Congress and as a Governor, he is much more savvy with legislation than Trump, which would be a plus except that he would use it for a backwards platform. And while Trump is drowning in nepotism, influences like Ivanka and Jared Cushner have kept Donald toward more gay-friendly policies. Pence calls his wife the religious warrior of the family, if that is any indication of how frightful it would be for her to have a President's ear.
So as in-your-face painful an destructive as Trump is, Pence would be more insidious and more effective. Pick your poison.
Pence is certainly more emotionally stable than Trump, but he will use that focus to push through a far-right agenda. With Pence's history in Congress and as a Governor, he is much more savvy with legislation than Trump, which would be a plus except that he would use it for a backwards platform. And while Trump is drowning in nepotism, influences like Ivanka and Jared Cushner have kept Donald toward more gay-friendly policies. Pence calls his wife the religious warrior of the family, if that is any indication of how frightful it would be for her to have a President's ear.
So as in-your-face painful an destructive as Trump is, Pence would be more insidious and more effective. Pick your poison.
470
Pence is getting his far-right agenda implemented anyway through Trump. I'd rather have another corporatist Christian for president than the maniacs Trump and Bannon. At least he wouldn't start WWIII.
19
Stop thinking Ivanka and Jared are good people there to mitigate disaster.
Whatever their agenda, beyond personal enrichment, favors them, not you or me.
Whatever their agenda, beyond personal enrichment, favors them, not you or me.
21
Or possibly there is already reason to impeach both Trump and Pence. My list of their offenses grows daily.
9
I’ll bet we never thought we’d have a president who needed to be housebroken. Fortunately, Mike Pence is there to scold him with a gruff, “Bad president!” when it’s needed. And it’s needed a lot.
Sadly, this dog can talk, and he’s taken to growling at every passing dignitary. And while it’s true that some border collies have better vocabularies than the president, we should cut him some slack. Border collies are very smart dogs.
Pence will have to keep the president on a very short leash, or he’ll run into traffic and cause chaos. That will distract him from dealing with important issues, like making sure investment advisers are free to skim as much money as they can from retirees, and ensuring that hedge fund managers don’t starve. Yes, they make good money as it is. But twenty million dollars doesn’t go as far as it used to, you know.
For all of this to work, Betsy DeVos must become secretary of education. Only a population of ignorant people who learned nothing in school can ensure a ready supply of sheep to be sheared by the various bloodsuckers that are waiting to be unleashed.
So it looks like we’ve not only got a self-absorbed snarling flop-eared simpleton for a president, but we’ve also got a misogynistic self-righteous climate-change-denying bible-thumping creationist to actually push through policy when the big dog is taking a nap.
Aww, look at his leg twitch! He must be dreaming.
Sadly, this dog can talk, and he’s taken to growling at every passing dignitary. And while it’s true that some border collies have better vocabularies than the president, we should cut him some slack. Border collies are very smart dogs.
Pence will have to keep the president on a very short leash, or he’ll run into traffic and cause chaos. That will distract him from dealing with important issues, like making sure investment advisers are free to skim as much money as they can from retirees, and ensuring that hedge fund managers don’t starve. Yes, they make good money as it is. But twenty million dollars doesn’t go as far as it used to, you know.
For all of this to work, Betsy DeVos must become secretary of education. Only a population of ignorant people who learned nothing in school can ensure a ready supply of sheep to be sheared by the various bloodsuckers that are waiting to be unleashed.
So it looks like we’ve not only got a self-absorbed snarling flop-eared simpleton for a president, but we’ve also got a misogynistic self-righteous climate-change-denying bible-thumping creationist to actually push through policy when the big dog is taking a nap.
Aww, look at his leg twitch! He must be dreaming.
909
I think it was the main thing that we're taught to take away from world history lessons:
Corrupt states seek to control the People through state-controlled education. Beware.
Of course, there are two sides to this approach right now -- and "conservatives" think that public schools teaching children to be open-minded critical thinkers is just "liberal" programming.
The move to put someone like DeVos in charge because she will cede educational control to neo-Christians who wish to destroy the First Amendment is evidence enough about which side is corrupt.
Corrupt states seek to control the People through state-controlled education. Beware.
Of course, there are two sides to this approach right now -- and "conservatives" think that public schools teaching children to be open-minded critical thinkers is just "liberal" programming.
The move to put someone like DeVos in charge because she will cede educational control to neo-Christians who wish to destroy the First Amendment is evidence enough about which side is corrupt.
16
I am pretty sure that my two Border Collies are smarter than Trump. They are also able to convey their thoughts without tweeting.
10
Great column, one of Ms Collins' best. And great comment, best of those I've read.
6
I would love to see Trump impeached but know it would be a total disaster because Pence would become the president.
It is so embarrassing for us as Americans to have submitted Trump as the leader of the United States of America throughout the world for all to see a candidate who was unqualified to be president of the United States. He confirms this each and every day by showing his overall ignorance and his lack of any real interest in the real world, international politics, and just ordinary diplomacy. He is a huge danger for us here in the States as well as all people throughout the world.