How to Stick to Your New Year’s Resolutions

I love the question, "why aren't I doing this already?" It really helps to change the perspective of the goal. If you can answer that, I believe you will be more successful, because you've already assessed the barriers and (hopefully) made a plan to overcome them.
I'm going to look back at all my resolutions and ask myself that question!
I'm also going to ask this when I counsel on nutrition, to help people find answers and to make healthy changes successfully.

"What is the use of principles except to give one an agreeable sense of wickedness when one doesn't act on them." A. Trollope

My advice: only make resolutions that feel good and are fun to keep. A few of mine:
Drink more champagne
Read more fiction and poetry
Don't leave the house without at least a bit of makeup
Spend more time on the phone with old, faraway friends (as opposed to emails and texts) etc...

You want to improve your memory? One hears the phrase "memory is like a muscle." I found that to be true my senior year in college (71-72). Although an English major, I was preparing a senior organ recital. As part of that preparation, I decide to memorize the entire recital. (Most organists play recitals with the music, as I did on the day, even though it is mostly or completely memorized.) It took a lot of time and work, but one day a few weeks before the recital, I sat down and played all of the pieces straight through.

But something else had been happening along the way. I found that I was remembering better the poetry I was studying that year. I had a great sense of well-being in relation to the rest of my academic work. My brain felt more "alive."

Based on my experience, I'd say the best way to improve your memory is to memorize things: poems, a new language, vocabulary, songs, whatever. Strengthening the memory "muscle" with specific "exercises" may work for you as it did for me.

I like the idea of reflection as a memory aid. For myself making it "whole body" might help - reflecting while walking or moving. I'm also experimenting with different ideas for journaling as a memory aid - the daily 1 second movie published yesterday intrigued me - capturing visual and sound.

Speaking for myself, I've never had a problem with making and keeping New Year's resolutions. There's just one I've made, and it's the easiest of all to keep. Simply put, it's to not make any more resolutions. Life just has a way of making rigid adherence to righteous resolves impossible, anyway.

I have always been a HTMO ('hope to miss out") rather than a FOMO (fear of missing out) person. It adds so much more quality free time to my life. Now that our children are all out of the house and our elderly parents are deceased in the last few years, it is really all about us. Phone calls go to voice mail, doorbells are not answered, spontaneous trips are taken without telling anyone. I changed jobs going from high pressure management to 8&s8 salaried employee with little change in income. Stop fooling yourself with all of those distractions and the illusion you are so important or those interruptions are important. You aren't and they aren't.

The only New Year's resolution I've kept was to stop making New Year's resolutions. Long term success is unlikely to follow a resolution when the answer to “Why do I feel the need to do this now?” is "because it's the New Year."

I've found that real change comes from genuine displeasure with oneself. Anything less - including the usual "I really need to...lose weight/get organized/exercise more often .." won't survive the inevitable periods of stress we all experience at one point or another.

And just a few more:

Sensible heels.
Simple jewelry, but good jewelry.
White fish salad prepares in a good deli.
Tuesday Weld.
Buster Keaton.
W.C. Fields.
William Powell and Myrna Loy.
Warren Williams, the old Hollywood actor.
Dr. Brown's Black Cherry Soda.
Sugar Cokes in the original thick glass bottles.
Large eggs, fresh lettuce and chocolate milk, all locally produced.
Synagogues where women run everything, but still defer to the men.
My 1967 baby blue Ford Mustang fastback, V8 engine, leather upholstery with a jump seat in the back, air conditioned. Long gone now, but I still drive it in my dreams.
Lacrosse sticks made out of wood and catgut.
Gordon Lightfoot, Richie Havens, Glen Campbell, Shawn Colvin, Stan Rogers, Mary Chapin Carpenter and all of Motown.
Batman comic books, the ones from the forties and fifties.
"Lonely are the Brave" with Kirk Douglas --- his very best picture --and a Gena Rowlands to-die-for.
Black and white comedies and mysteries from the 20's, 30's and 40's.
Alden shoes, Gitman shirts, New Balance sneakers, but only when I can get them cheap.
Commentary Magazine, the old Partisan Review, the old Sporting News. the old New Yorker.
Johnny Unitas and Raymond Barry.
Pool halls and barber shops where you can still get a shoeshine.

There's more, but for that you will have to wait for the graphic novel.

I do not make New Year’s Resolutions, but I know what I like and plan to continue liking in 2016.
Here is a partial list:

Books by and about Abraham Lincoln, H.L. Mencken, George Orwell, T.S. Eliot, James Baldwin, Scott Fitzgerald, Theodore Dreiser and the U.S. soldiers who fought in World War II.
Audio recordings of old radio programs which I listen to before going to bed. (Gunsmoke, The Lone Ranger, The Shadow, Boston Blackie, Jean Shepherd.)
Goldenberg Peanut Chews, Cadbury Fruit and Nut Bars, Mr. Goodbars.
Willie Mays and Johnny Unitas.
Benjamin Netanyahu and Sheldon Adelson.
Beef tongue sandwiches, extra lean, on Jewish rye.
Big dogs, preferably weighing more than 120 lbs., with heads the size of garbage-can lids.
Cats who like to sleep on your feet on cold winter nights.
Plastic Man.
Citizen Kane, Treasure of the Sierra Madre.
Kosher hot dogs wrapped in bologna, topped with sauerkraut and deli-mustard served on old fashioned Kaiser rolls along with big kosher dill pickles and extra-thick, hand-cut onion rings.
Spaghetti Caruso.
Caesar salad prepared in a good Italian restaurant by a waiter who knows what he’s doing.
Boys' regular hair cuts.
Blue blazers, blue button shirts, khakis, striped ties, cordovan shoes and belts.
Tortoise shell eyeglass frames.
Women who wear just a touch of makeup and never wear dangly earrings.
Women who laugh a lot, read lots of murder mysteries and like to go to concert and plays.
Chanel No. 5.
Pearls. Good ones.
Dresses, not skirts.

Even without trying this--because I don't make New Year's Resolutions--I'd recommend it.

Why? Because, when I was in analysis, my analyst often reminded me that one of his methods, with any new thought or question from me, was; to ask "Why this? and Why now?" That's precisely what Frakt is doing and so, it seems very well founded.

Normal human memory gets worse with age, but overall "remembering" often improves because many people develop better external memory aids to help them keep track of what's important to them. Rather than find time to "reflect", I suggest using your month-long commitment to figure out an effective approach (for you!) to enter the events and decisions you're not remembering and adapting it so it helps. The thinking and reflection of recording the events will help all by itself.

I never keep my New Year's Resolutions, and have determined it might
have something to do with the fact that I usually make them on
New Year's Eve after 3 glasses of champagne. So, my advice to
myself is to make my resolution cold sober, and try it for a month per
Mr. Frakt's advice.

I admit it, I'm always puzzled by self-help experts who talk about turning off their phones and email in order to have hours for "uninterrupted work." What kind of work, exactly? Writing code? For most employed workers, phone calls, emails, and other ways of communicating with other human beings ARE work. Whether you are a manager, an administrative assistant, a lawyer, nurse, police officer, or barista, your main job consists of interacting with others, who can demand your attention at any time. It's as bad as being a parent with a small baby. Now how do you cope with that workflow?

I read this after seeking a distraction from my writing assignment. Ouch! But it gives me something to think about.

The book "Power of Habit" has been a terrific resource for me for understanding habits and how to develop good ones.

Great advice. And just what I needed to hear today. Thank you.

Thank you so much! I always hated when my resolutions never worked. Gaaack! It made me feel weak and wishy-washy and I thought maybe that was what I really was. I can see that this method could work for me because a month long commitment is doable instead of thinking it's forever and getting scared off of trying.