#ShoutYourAbortion Gets Angry Shouts Back

Oct 02, 2015 · 618 comments
Renata Vincent (London)
I know someone who had an abortion two years ago and now, when trying desperately to have a child, has developed a severe case of pcos rendering her sterile, the few times she did conceive in this meantime her uterus was not capable of holding the fetus. Divine punishment, coincidence, fate, irony of life? Who knows.
CatSunflower (California)
Coincidence. Lots of people who have abortions go on to have kids.
ejzim (21620)
I have always supported a woman's right to choose what's best for her, and nobody else. I have never been silent about my opinion. But, I would not "shout" about it, if I had had an abortion. No reasonable person thinks abortion is a good thing, it's just the correct solution for some family planning and health problems, which shouldn't be made worse by strangers sticking their noses in, where they don't belong.
stonecutter (Broward County, FL)
I have a lot of opinions, even about abortion, a decision a bit outside my wheelhouse, given I'm a retired, divorced father of two adult sons. My ex-wife, a fine mother to my sons as they grew to fine men, once had a miscarriage more than 30 years ago, which devastated her emotionally for months, and then after a traumatic medical event while on vacation, she was told by medical "experts" at two prestigious hospitals that she had a rare blood cancer; unless she submitted to a total hysterectomy, dooming her chance to ever get pregnant again, let alone give birth, she would (not might, would) die. My ex, to my amazement and fear at the time, decided the doctors were wrong; she insisted she knew her own body and sensed she wasn't so ill as the doctors claimed, so she went to the seashore for a few weeks to relax and "meditate", while I stayed at home, working and waiting, sometimes believing she might be delusional. She promised that when she returned, if the tests they had run were still "positive", she'd submit to the surgery.

Upshot: she returned, was tested, and found normal! Tested again a few weeks later: still normal. Three months later, pregnant! The rest, as they say, is history, and we have two grown sons of whom we're very proud, and a lifetime of memories. I have always admired my ex-wife for her courage, and her mysterious certainty back then to know her own mind and body, despite the dire warnings of those "experts". A woman's "right to choose".
KM (NH)
Ms. Bono refers to the need for a culture change. That change needs to be about responsibility for sexual behavior, by both men and women, and it needs to be about valuing life--not just for a fetus but for the elderly, the disabled, and especially for children in general. I am pro life but I also support women's right to choose. I just hope they would choose life.
Meh (Atlantic Coast)
I knew then and I know even more now, I'm not emotionally equipped to deal with raising a child alone, although I did and it was tough on me. Don't regret the birth of my son, but I could never be a single parent of 2 or more children.
Travis Greene (North Carolina)
I agree with some of these other comments. I think we should praise women and men who take adequate precautions to prevent abortion. The Clintons were right when they said abortion should be rare. Why in the world would we want it to be common? We want heart bypasses and brain surgery to be a remedy if necessary, but I think we can all agree that those should be a last resort and a rare occurrence. Abortion should be in the same category.
CatSunflower (California)
I am 100% for promoting the use of birth control, but please remember that many women who obtain abortions were taking adequate precautions. A quick google search will direct you to the stories of several women who sought abortion after becoming pregnant with an IUD (which is more effective than tubal litigation), even after it had worked for them for several years. Birth control reduces the likelihood of pregnancy significantly, but it does not eliminate it, and the false dichotomy that says birth control and abortion are mutual exclusive is hurtful to the countless women who resorted to the latter in spite of the former.
Manoflamancha (San Antonio)
Since most parents are raising kids to be irresponsible....they will do what they want including taking drugs, drinking alcohol, and having unprotected sex. How young? Well lets see, there is a TV show called "Help I'm 12 and Pregnant." Female oral contraceptives might help since the young boys don't wear protection, will reduce murdering little babies, and help reduce the surface population.

Yes there are negligible few number of women who via rape or medical condition may need to have an abortion. However, the preponderance of abortions are had primarily by little girls in their teens, 20's, and 30's who go out on a weekend and boogie, she is not on the pill and the boy does not wear protection.....she gets pregnant...then wants to abort the bothersome fetus so she can go out and boogie again as soon as possible. The wacky idiotic scenario is that the little girl could have also contracted AIDS, syphilis and many other sexually transmitted diseases along with her pregnancy. But hey, constitutional freedom means everyone has the right to do whatever they want to do, right?
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
There's a whole lot in your comment with which people can take offense, but just to pick out one: referring to females in their "teens, 20s, and 30s" as "little girls" is a surefire way to:
1. Insult and disgust any female reading the comment, and a large majority of males;
and
2. Have the effect of them disregarding anything else you might have to say, on the grounds that your language indicates just how little respect you appear to have for females.
thomas bishop (LA)
is there also a #ShoutYourContraception?

with contraception, fewer people should be angry, scared, sick or dying.

in particular, women and men should have free information about IUDs: their effectiveness, cost and side effects. at the very least, women should not be ashamed or intimidated to talk about contraception and sex, which they often are.

p.s. although english is not (yet) an international language, the internet is an international form of communication. people in europe, e. asia, s. asia, w. asia (aka the middle east), africa, s. america, n. america and australia also have voices, although it is sometimes considered rude to shout in different cultures.
thomas bishop (LA)
p.p.s. please note that abortion and contraception are issues that should concern both men and women. women get pregnant and give birth, and men are legally required to provide child support.
Thom Ganski (Fl)
I am an advocate of a woman's right to choose; however, I never cease to be amazed at how women, or organizations that represent them, choose to go to battle with those who would take that right away. First to Plan Parenthood, as it pertains to your role in abortions, regardless how minor, you need to act as though you work for the CIA. What I mean by that is to keep your activities strictly to yourself. At least, do not go to dinners, etc with strangers and discuss your abortion related activities openly with strangers no matter how they present themselves. Be paranoid.

Second, to the abortion rights people, while we must defend a woman's right to choose, please do not be so stupid as to celebrate having made that choice. Most of us support the right primarily because we know we are not in your shoes. We do not support killing embryos. Taking embryos will never, ever be anything to celebrate, or "shout out" about. This is not an equal rights issue. Women have been given a right that is unique, and they should maintain some humility about it.

Jeez.
KMW (New York City)
As a pro-life woman, we are concerned about the life of the baby and mother and want those considering having abortions or who have had abortions to know that there are resources for those who need assistance. The individuals who work at these places are extremely kind and not one bit judgmental and some have even been in the same predicament. One such organization is Rachel House that is staffed with caring and compassionate people. Another group is Prolife across America. They never judge and neither do I. That is a promise.
BRASS (Vegas)
All those Shout Your Abortion supporters who had abortions NOT related to rape, incest or the health of the mother/child should wear signs that say:
I put my personal convenience ahead of the human life I created. I take no responsibility for my actions.
Ana (NYC)
Would you recommend that the men who impregnated them wear similar signs?
Human (Planet Earth)
And what signs should we make the "fathers" of these abortions wear? Scarlet A's?
CatSunflower (California)
Sorry, but I don't think that putting one's own life ahead of a non-sentient fetus is that bad of a thing. I have not had an abortion, but if I did, I would wear that sign. Life is hard. I'm not going to drag someone knew into it until I feel a certain degree of conviction in my choice to do so. It is a crime that we are able to bring new people into the world by accident.
Sue (California)
I support abortion rights, but I wish our society made it easier to choose motherhood. Single mothers are stigmatized--including by school employees, who should know better. Many women feel that they would have to make unreasonable career sacrifices--and, for the most part, they aren't wrong. When are we going to start valuing mothers and children?
ck NY (Yorktown, NY)
"safe, legal and rare." If one in three women has had an abortion, I don't think it's very rare.
spacetimejunkie (unglaciated indiana)
Most of these so-called prolifers rationalize their behavior and opinion because of "GOD".

This same "GOD" is the one who causes approx. 40% of pregnancies to spontaneously abort.

It would be more fitting for prolifers to send their threats and condemnations to this posited SUPREME BEING.
Beej (Bronx, NY)
Brava to all these women. They've clearly had it up to here--as have I--with the intolerance and dangerous mean-spiritedness of the anti-choice crowd.
Every time I read or hear the phrase "pro-life", I wince. No one is against life. The media should never have adopted that expression to describe the stance of those who oppose abortion, and should stop using it now. The accurate, properly-descriptive term is "anti-choice".
Finally, may I remind us all of Gloria Steinem's famous statement from, yes, way back in the '70s: "If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament."
Bruce (Springville, Utah)
Unlimited abortion up till birth? Be specific on what you support please; R v Wade compromise or unfettered termination at any point?

The slogans are specious. Many men, including me, are far more down on irresponsible serial impregnators than the women they impregnate.
Catherine (New Jersey)
A few days ago, a newborn was tossed to her death from a 7th story window. This tragedy would be considered an mere exercise in "choice" if the girl was killed just weeks earlier. To a pro-life person like myself, the value and dignity of that little girl are the same whether blood is still coursing through her umbilical cord or if it is clamped off. We must have mercy for this mother and for all mothers, even the ones who make choices we find abhorrent.

Ultimately, hashtag activism doesn't advance dialogue or help us understand one another. It furthers polarization and misunderstanding.
CatSunflower (California)
The difference is that it was no longer enslaving the mother's body after it was born, so it's rights were not in conflict with someone else's. Killing a born baby is gratuitous. Killing a fetus is sometimes necessary to return to a woman the God-granted right (yes you heard me) to exclusive use of her own organs and nutrients. Is that so hard to understand?
sim (NJ)
Once again separation of church and state remains a problem. The religious fairytale of an immortal soul is at the heart of the issue. If society ever gets beyond these speculative ideas, we may finally advance the human race.
ck NY (Yorktown, NY)
So it's religion that's the problem. What about a moral society? Do we need religion to tell right from wrong? Are you really telling us that killing a child in utero (and we can quabble over when they become a child but if they can live outside the womb, I think it's safe to say "child") but that's okay because of the mother's "right to choose?"
Bruce (Springville, Utah)
The separation of church and state is not the problem. If we throw all non-subjective moral codes out the window (sometimes falsely equated with religion) do you really think we'll "finally advance the human race"?

With or without religion, with or without an anthropomorphic God/god, society must have a God--a god whose is only defined by the lines we must not cross, regardless the pressure.

The creedo "I will not murder, no matter the circumstance" is a god we must embrace. The creedo "I will not rape, no matter the circumstance" is also god. Why? Because whether or not there is a big man upstairs, these absolutes must not be crossed or the human falls into the conditions so familiar throughout the hellholes of the world.

In fact, we can define a false god as any who gives permission to violate these absolutes. In fact, as a society we all must agree to worship at the alter of this God, as defined by certain moral absolutes.

Roe v Wade tried to find a balance between two fundamental principles--don't murder, and protect individual privacy. Neither side is happy with this, but an effort was made to determine a reasonable timeline for the strong initiation of the protections of personhood. To say we should be able to abort any time before full term delivery strains the ethical mind; as does the draconian and invasive policing required to protect a fetus from the instant of conception.
Amazonspouse (Seattle)
Having grown up in Texas, I received no education regarding sexuality or how to prevent pregnancy other than my father telling me, "If you ever get pregnant, I'll kill you." When I became pregnant while in college, I was terrified and chose to terminate the pregnancy. I have since been married and have 3 brilliant, beautiful children ... without a doubt, the greatest blessing of my life. To the religious zealots who "know" that my abortion was a horrible sin, I ask, then why would God have gifted me with my amazing children after I had this procedure? Could it be that you really don't know the will of God? Could it be that your religion is just that ... YOUR religion? And why should your personal religion dictate the activity of others who don't share your beliefs? Your desire to subjugate woman (or gays for that matter) to live by your religious beliefs, whether you are the Taliban or the Pope, is unacceptable in enlightened society.

I love babies, but I do not believe that fetal tissue is the same thing as a baby anymore than I believe that an acorn is the same think as oak tree. If you disagree, then don't have an abortion.
Bruce (Springville, Utah)
Fetal tissue at what point of pregnancy? The bounds of the compromise of R v W or right up to 9 months? I wish there was more specificity to this debate, because I think both extremes have issues. If your call a fully developed baby "fetal tissue", I would definitely have a problem with the morality of this--and this has to do with ethics, not religious tradition. I think this line needs to be more visible to separate the sheep from the goats.
Winter Miller (NYC)
Abortion on demand, without apology. Subsidized. Accessible. Available to any pregnant person who wants to end their pregnancy regardless of age or ability to pay. No waiting periods. No parental consent forms. No more shame.
Bruce (Springville, Utah)
To what point in the pregnancy? Past viability? Right up to full term? I hope most people would have issues having that amount of blood on their hands. I would give more specifics, rather than catchphrases (this to both sides of the debate).
Kris Massachusetts (United States)
There is only one reason to publish someone's address: to threaten violence. I worked at Planned Parenthood for 4 years and my home address, car license plate, and the route I took to work were published. Anti-abortion people are not "pro-life."
common christian (pheonix)
No one should be happy about ending a life. I am not sure why the death of an innocent child should be celebrated. This is appalling and just bad form. I could be more blunt but frankly I'm saddened how far society has fallen.
West Texas Guy (West Texas)
I never knew my maternal grandmother. She died when my mother was in her early teens. While I was returning home from my mother's funeral, I visited my mother's sister for several days. During the visit, my aunt let drop that my grandmother had died of infection as a result of a abortion at the hands of a non-medical person. This was during the Depression, when the family of seven could not sell their farm produce for the cost of gas needed to get it to market.

I sometimes think about how much better my mother's life would have been if safe abortion had been available and she had grown up with a mother of her own.
ck NY (Yorktown, NY)
But now, vs. the Depression we have a thing called "contraceptives" which are legally and readily available. How about we prevent vs. end pregnancy.
cynical sophisticate (Hackettstown Clearviw Cinema)
Enough"shouting out" about everything- It doesn't prove anything- But it antagonizes conflicting opinion holders and makes. the problem worse- Great for the media and sells papers . Nauseating- Can't people protest quietly and with dignity
Kevin (Overland Park)
The real problem is the lack of education on contraceptives. If we inform kids on these there will be less unwanted pregnancies and less abortions
Moe (.)
Let's not forget that contraception fails and controlling fertility over a lifetime is a challenging task.
anthony weishar (Fairview Park, OH)
Well, we're on the right track. This is a women's issue. Take the men out of it. Men cannot get pregnant. Men cannot relate. We have the equivalent of lobsters dictating flying rules to swans. Why are wealthy old white guys telling women how to live?
Bruce (Springville, Utah)
I'm so tired of the hackneyed slogans (from both sides).

One could argue, from that point of view, that we should let horrors like the Darfur genocides continue because hey, we're not Africans, so we don't know what the murderers were feeling at the time.

Are these ladies pushing for privacy and access under the R v W compromise, or saying that a woman should be able to abort right up until full term? Why not some context? Why not some solid proposals on what is suggested for a good criteria for abortion rights and limits? Because it doesn't make good sound bites, that's why.
dobes (<br/>)
ShoutYourAbortion isn't about feeling proud about having an abortion, though I don't think it's a reason to feel ashamed, either. It's about giving voice to the fact that one out of three women has had an abortion. It's more akin to coming out of the closet than anything else.

Maybe the one thing that both sides could agree on is reducing the number of women who feel they are in a position where they have to have an abortion. For example, I would not have chosen to have my two abortions when I was in my late teens and early twenties if I had had access to free birth control, free pregnancy and post-partum care, free health care for my resulting baby, subsidized day care for the baby, and paid maternity leave. In other words, I had those abortions because I was poor, because I was trying to build a better life for me and my existing children, and because another child would have collapsed our fragile deck of cards.

You think society shouldn't have to provide those things, and that women shouldn't have children until they have a way to support all that? Fine. That's what abortion is for.
Bruce (Springville, Utah)
And condoms (very cheap or free), and hormonal birth control (relatively cheap--and yes, probably should be free), and self-control...I would hope that even for pro-choice proponents, abortion is a refuge of last resort--and one taken before the fetus has grown much.
hla3452 (Tulsa)
There seems to be some sort of misconception (pun intended) that Planned Parenthood is the only abortion provider. Planned Parenthood of Oklahoma does not provide abortions. But I believe that the abortion rate in my state is about the same as most other states. What Planned Parenthood does provide is essential primary women's health care accepting either Medicaid or on a sliding scale not offered by many private providers. While our local Catholic Charities offers a medical clinic, birth control is not an offering. But they have bought a lot across the street from Reproductive Services so there can be ongoing protests. I know women who have opted for terminating their pregnancies and as a nurse have cared for women undergoing 2nd trimester abortions. None of these women made their decisions lightly or entered into the process without emotional distress.
JuJu (London)
I support a woman's right to make choices that effect her directly. But with freedom of choice also comes responsibility. Why do women put themselves in positions were they face an unwanted pregnancy? Abortion is now becoming a form of contraception, used casually like the pill, and I don't believe that is something to be proud about.
fred (florida)
Vote! Tell the republican men you are all going to vote.
Gordeaux (Somewhere in NJ)
I am a pro-choice male. I believe abortion should be legal under certain circumstances.

But for someone to say that women own their own bodies is an oversimplification. The fact is that a pregnant woman at some point has two bodies, hers and her fetus's. And while she certainly should have complete control over her own body, at some point it must be acknowledged that she cannot have complete control over the body of her fetus. When that point occurs has been a topic of much disagreement.

And when someone says that you just cannot force someone to bring a baby into the world, that's really not an accurate statement. Once a baby has been conceived, at some point the mother loses her ability to choose not to deliver it. Because at some point the fetus has rights that also need to be considered and protected. Again, when that point occurs has been the topic of much disagreement.

Talking about a woman's right to an abortion in absolute terms, completely ignoring those of the fetus, is a weak argument for the pro-choice position. And it does a disservice to those of us who are pro-choice to make us have to defend it.
HT (Ohio)
A woman never loses the right to control her own body. Abortion is legal up until the point of viability, but after viability, she has still has the right to end a pregnancy. She can have labor induced or she can have a scheduled C-section. Women, in consultation with her doctors, routinely make this decision when complications arise late in a pregnancy.
Susie (Cincinnati)
Roe v Wade made that demarcation. When a fetus becomes viable you have two distinct beings and can only abort to preserve the life and health of the mother or save a resulting baby from needless suffering before he dies.
Reader (Westchester, NY)
I'll make it easier for you. When the fetus can survive outside the womb, then it's a person. Until then, it is dependent on using another person's body to support it.

If the pro-lifers really believed that "one's right to life should be more important than another person's choice" they would be trying to pass legislation that forced people to donate blood and kidneys. Heck, they would be donating their own kidneys. They're not, because the idea that a man should be forced to use his body parts against his will to keep someone else alive is seen as absurd.

Quite frankly, I didn't used to be this militant. But a woman died in Ireland because a hospital refused to abort a fetus that doctors knew would not survive and indeed died in the womb, after causing the mother to go into irreversible septic shock. A hospital in Arizona was criticized for providing an abortion in the exact same situation to save a mother's life. The pro-life crowd has PROVEN to me that they don't care about life- just controlling women.
AJ (Bethesda, MD)
I had an abortion about 35 years ago and never regretted it. Not even now when I am older (69) and have no children. Also, I doubt very much if I would think about it at all, if people weren't screaming about it (pro and con). In my opinion, when done very early, it is just a medical procedure.
swm (providence)
Drawing upon the thought that NM offered, why is no one shouting out their vasectomy?
dobes (<br/>)
Because Congress isn't trying to find a way to shut down vasectomy clinics? Because no one is trying to make men feel ashamed of taking advantage of their right to a vasectomy?
James (Hartford)
This whole #Shouting match seems very glib. Most of the #Shouters don't have anything substantive to contribute except to assert very volubly and repeatedly that they really, truly, definitely DON'T feel bad! And their decisions were totally 100% justified! And even if they weren't it doesn't matter because it's their choice, now isn't it!

It's a festival of protesting too much.

But to the extent that there is any real substance to this #Clamor, it is that women need better child-care options. I support this suggestion. I think it's sad that women would feel they need to hold their own fetuses hostage to have their child-care demands met, but all's fair in love and war, they say.

Maybe if women feel they live in a society that supports their ability to bear children, then the extremists will put down the weapon, and quietly step away from the fetus.
Dr. Randolph l Cookestien (Texas)
I was born in 1947 and lived in this world before Roe Vs. Wade. Abortion was against the law but any woman with money and connections could get one. Here is how it worked. Female presents with amenorrhea. Doctor asks for a pregnancy test. Doctor (Male) substitutes his urine for the female patients. Test result negative. Doctor performs a D&C. If you want to go back to this plus the patients who present to the ER with a hemorrhage from a botched procedure than outlaw the procedure.
Meh (Atlantic Coast)
And that's part of the picture. The wealthy have always had resources available to them that the poor have not. Poor women, the least of whom can afford a child were forced into backrooms or to continually have children they neither wanted nor could afford to have while (the wealthier) society looked down their noses.

All cats are gray at night.
MLHE (Phoenix)
A. Bore. Shun. Right? Michael Newton, Ph.D.'s books (Journey of Souls, Destiny of Souls) make this whole "life thing" more understandable.

Humans are meant to have choice. Choice is meant to give experience. Experience is meant to expand the mind through either work or play or more meaning.

Earth is NOT a school. It is just a place to gather experiences. The kind of God people are brainwashed into believing is not some person who collects report cards for people who get As in cancer or Fs in abortion.

When we all treat one another with love and respect, when choices are honored for the experiences they bring, when the creative energy of love surrounds biology and philosophy, the world will change into an even richer landscape.

Thank you Ms. Bonow and Ms. West. Thank you for the shout, and thank you for the whisper of your own experiences.
Robert Coane (US Refugee CANADA)
"An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all." ~ OSCAR WILDE
Helah Blumhagen (mexico)
When your right to get an appendectomy is posSibly taken away from you, you will be doing a great amount of shouting. Thank you ladies for finding a way for women to express their side. The alternative to no safe abortion is illegal abortion , an absolutely horrible experience. This would be a very sad day in U.S. History. Please let us not return to that time!!!
Colenso (Cairns)
It's not just women who have abortions. Many girls do also. Furthermore, some pregnant girls in the USA are very young, especially amongst African Americans, Mexican Americans and Native Americans. The USA has the highest rate of teen pregnancies in the Western world.

Perhaps if we stop with the political correctness and recognise that all fecund females may become pregnant, and many will wish they hadn't, and that it is often in everyone's best interests to terminate the pregnancy as soon as possible, we might start to make some progress.

Moreover, putting an unwanted human infant up for adoption is a far worse crime than terminating an embryo or a foetus. For one thing, a human infant needs to be breast-fed for the first two years of its life by its biological mother. I believe that most of us would rather never have been born than have been so-called adopted, ie handed over to complete strangers.
Human (Planet Earth)
While your comments on teen pregnancies make some sense, your vilifying of adoption is extreme.

For a starter, while breastfeeding is certainly highly recommended, we have developed very good substitutions, and even babies staying with their biological mothers in the U.S. mostly don't get breastfed beyond 3 months.

Far worse is your insinuation that most adoptees would rather never have been born than be adopted. I am sorry that adoption did not work out well for you, but the vast majority of adoptees have good lives and good relationship with their adoptive parents.
Moe (.)
Giving birth is not always a benign event. Many women have lifelong injuries from giving birth. Young girls are also vulnerable, especially of they are not fully mature physically.
KMW (New York City)
How about this. I am pro life and I can tell others I am pro life. If abortion proponents can say they are for abortion I can equally proclaim I am pro life. Fair is fair. Right? I am not ashamed in saying I am pro life and actually feel quite comfortable in doing so. I do not wear the pro-life message on my sleeve but will stand up and defend the unborn when the occasion calls for it. This is my right as a woman in the US and I will continue doing so.
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
No one is asking you to feel ashamed for being pro-life - or, more accurately in my view, anti-abortion. That is your personal belief, to which you are entitled.
However, I very much doubt that there is an abundance of "pro-abortion" people, or that "abortion proponents" is an accurate depiction of people who support the right of a women to exercise her choice.
You may feel free to shout from the rooftops that you are "pro-life." But you cut off the discussion entirely when you grossly mischaracterize the people who believe that a woman has a right to choose whether to carry a pregnancy to term or to seek an abortion. Referring to them as "abortion proponents" or "pro-abortion" is needlessly and inaccurately inflammatory. Personally, I am "pro-choice" and believe that the choice is one that ought to be available; I support her right to make the right choice for her circumstances, whichever one is chosen. That is not remotely akin to someone being "pro-abortion." In fact, it's insulting that anyone can equate *supporting the right to seek an abortion OR to give birth* with being an "abortion proponent."
CommonCents (Coastal Maine)
Where are the men who were co-creators of the unborn baby in this discussion? Don't they have equal rights too.....or just pay the bill as usual?
Prairie Village Writer (Prairie Village, KS)
Yes, where are the men? Where was the father of the little girl thrown out of the window? Where are the men who continually impregnate women and then disappear? You would think that all pregnancies and births were virginal. I would imagine that many don't have a clue, don't really care, are fearful of the responsibility or woefully lacking in sex education. Until men are really held equally responsible for unwanted pregnancies we will continue to deal with this issue.
Vivn8r (Tallahassee Fl)
New life is indeed a joyous miracle; however, if childbearing (and for the most part, child rearing) had been assigned as a male instead of female burden to bear, Roe v. Wade would never even have come up. Questioning a MAN'S right to preside over his own body? Yeah, right.
Matt (RI)
The choice, and it IS a choice, to have an abortion is deeply personal and often, though not always, involves a great deal of soul searching and even grief. The idea that one should shout about it, even metaphorically, is juvenile and offensive. I tire of all the shouting on both sides.
Mom2KidsDog (Wisconsin)
While I agree it is not 'rare', it should still be safe, legal and PRIVATE. There is absolutely no need to share ANY of your medical history with the planet. Are we next going to start listing our sexual partners on the internet? FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING HOLY, KEEP YOUR PRIVATE AFFAIRS PRIVATE!
Anne Russell (Wilmington NC)
Two observations: 1) Pregnant women MUST have a legal right to decide whether to abort the pregnancy, for otherwise females can legally be made reproductive slaves of males who rape us; 2) Of course killing of new life in the womb is a sad event, not to be undertaken lightly. I value children more highly than anything else and am mother of 4, grandmother of 10. But at age 31 I was stranger-raped in Italy, by force, and when I returned to USA I chose to have my uterus removed so I could never again become pregnant nor fear uterine cancer caused by papilloma virus, did not know whether I was pregnant so technically did not have an abortion; however, had I been impregnated by this Greek rapist, I would have chosen abortion because I could not have loved nor properly cared for this child, and he would not have provided the paternal nurturing and support the child deserved. I wish the pro-abortion and anti-abortion entities would cease warfare and come together in the best interest of children and mothers. America, with all our resources, should be a child-positive society.
Lee (Tampa Bay)
Despite all the lies out there, most women who have abortions feel an overwhelming sense of relief at not having to become a mother when they were not ready post abortion. All the other garbage they may feel is induced upon them by a sexist society and patriarchal religion. Guns as we heard again last night are the real scourge of this country, not abortion. But hey, guns are a dude's thing and nobody is going to take that away from them right? If men could have abortions because they had to carry a pregnancy, they would be on every street corner next to a Starbucks.
Ms C (Union City, NJ)
For men, it would be next to a Buffalo Wild Wings. Where there'd be a special recovery room with recliners and big-screen TVs.
S.D. Keith (Birmingham, AL)
One in three women in America have had an abortion? Really? That equates to roughly 50 million women. Of all the women I know and have known in my life, a third of them should have had an abortion, but I can't name even one. Maybe it's because they were ashamed to tell. If so, I bet some stupid hashtag campaign won't change their minds about 'fessing up.

I think the Clintons got abortion exactly right. It should be safe, legal and rare. Women should not use abortion as a post-sex birth control method, not in this age of cheap and readily available birth control. The power of the womb carries responsibility. The idea of women gleefully going about getting abortions that this campaign seems to advocate, which by the way is an invasive medical procedure that is not without risks, is just disgusting.

Every time I think women in America can't get any more vulgar and reprehensible in their words and actions (e.g. Miley Cyrus, Lena Dunham, Amy Schumer, et al), something like this comes along to remind me that it's impossible to be too skeptical.

If celebrating the destruction of fetuses represents the apex of 10,000 years of civilization, the place where all this so-called progress has brought us, we'd have been better off as a species to just keep to the hunting and gathering.
dobes (<br/>)
Reminds me of back in the day when people would swear they had never met a gay person. Well, chances are they had - but that person hadn't revealed their sexuality. And perhaps it wasn't because they were ashamed of being gay - perhaps it was because they knew the judgmental nature of their "friend".
reedroid1 (Asheville NC)
I guess like most people who live in a bubble you've never heard about the ongoing attempts by the Republicans to make birth control procedures inaccessible, too.

And no doubt, if your character is anything like your screed, no woman who knows you would ever have mentioned to you what choice she had made, knowing that you would condemn and shame her as you do in this comment.

Thirdly, if you had read the article, you'd have learned that the movement is NOT to "celebrate" one's abortion but to stand up and be heard, and put a face -- or at least a name and hashtag# -- to the procedure.

But no doubt you read a few sentences and then reacted with condemnation, anger, and shaming.
Susie (Cincinnati)
Since teen pregnancies make up a portion of the abortion rate, and we know teens can make impulsive, rash decisions, it is incumbent on us to quit putting roadblocks in the way of comprehensive sex education and easily accessible long acting, long term birth control for teens. Legislatures, school boards, parents, teachers, school administrators, church leaders, etc. need to get on board.
hla3452 (Tulsa)
I have said it before and will say it again. In order to "CHOOSE LIFE" there must be a legal, safe alternative. It is the responsibility of those who oppose abortion to work to provide services and support for that choice. If there was a drumbeat of grassroots ProLife support for medical and social services to assist women for whom having a child would be an unbearable burden I would believe in the purity of their cause.
Eric (New York)
This is what we know about the anti-abortion (so-called "pri-life") crowd:

-They threaten to kill women who have had abortions
-Theyou threaten to kill abortion providers
-They kill abortion providers
-They oppose sex education (which reduces unwanted pregnancies)
-They oppose free contraceptives (proven to reduce abortions)
-They are pro-gun (proven to kill living people)
-They are against parental leave, universal health care, early childhood edycation, subsidised child care, help for poor women, help for the children of poor women

The anti-choice crowd promotes unwanted pregnancy and abortion.
David (Palmer Township, Pa.)
I despise people who feel that it is either their way or the highway. Not all religions regard a fetus as a person. To take away the right to choice is totally un-American. All of us were born because our mothers wanted us to be. That's a fact! Some women are not ready to have a child and do not want to bear one. Abortions have been performed for centuries. Women should have the option of terminating a pregnancy. Women should not be bullied by those who disagree. For those against abortions, support birth control!
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
I agree with you, except in the matter of it being a fact that all of us were born because our mothers wanted us to be. I'm blessed with a wonderful mother (and father) who very much wanted me. But I know other men and women who were deprived of that blessing - which really ought to be a basic human right - and grew up fully aware that they were not at all wanted.
To be unwanted by your own parent(s) is the sort of deep wound that is nearly impossible to remedy, let alone heal.
Gabbyboy (Colorado)
What a disconnect among right wing pro lifers...abortion is murder but a gun in every pocket is a "right"?
Claire (<br/>)
And what a disconnect among left wing "pro-choicers"...late-term abortions are a "right", harvesting and selling fetal organs is to be defended. How about finding some middle ground--the right gives on gun control and the left gives on abortion?
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
Every single mere suggestion of "restrictions" on guns, no matter how insignificant, is bitterly opposed.

But access to abortion? That has diminished to the point of not existing across wide swathes of this country. It is as good as illegal in an increasing number of areas. And anti-abortion politicians and activists are quite open about their endgame. Sure, they'll frame surgical center standards - even though surgical abortions are rarely or never performed there - as being all about "protecting" women. Same with having a doctor with admitting privileges in the closest hospital - never mind that in the extremely rare event of something going wrong, the hospital will always admit the woman, no matter who has treated her. But it's all about "protecting" the women, they say. Kind of like requiring doctote to tell outright lies about abortion being linked to breast cancer - all for protection, of course.
But it takes little effort for them to admit the truth: chip away at access and rights until they cease to exist. Thousands of tiny cuts, until suddenly a women in, say, the Rio Grande Valley has to travel 400 miles each way to obtain one.
So many miles of ground have already been conceded when it comes to abortion access. Tell me - what has been comparably conceded on guns?
Sequel (Boston)
I applaud women who are brave enough to state that they have felt the need to terminate a pregnancy.

Christianists have swung the question of abortion's legality so far in the direction of calling it a form of murder that they have completely obscured the central holding in Roe v. Wade, which remains as reasonable and valid a solution today as it was in 1973.

During gestation, fetal tissue is potential human life that passes through phases of increasing potential. As a result, at early phases, this remains exclusively the mother's decision, and at later phases, may be regulated or even banned by the state.

Religious extremists who maintain that any living tissue is in fact a person are spouting religious and legal nonsense that should not be allowed to deprive living, breathing female human beings of their most fundamental rights.
KMW (New York City)
We are mourning the deaths of 10 college students shot brutally in Oregon while some women are applauding their abortions. Something is terribly wrong in our society when we celebrate the killing of innocent human lives who never had a chance. This story is being reported because of the attack on Planned Parenthood by the Republicans over PP's unscrupulous manner of selling baby body parts. I happen to agree with the Republicans and am glad they are investigating this immoral behavior. They want to expose this evil organization that puts profits over innocent lives. Abortion is no laughing matter and this behavior is inhumane and just plain cruel. Let's put an end to this madness.
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
I'm not aware of any women "applauding" their abortions. I'm sure some exist out there, but this loosely organized campaign is in no way intended to celebrate or applaud having had an abortion.
What I'm aware of is women who are attempting to move the acknowledgement of abortion away from shameful whispers and into a more open, destigmatized conversation. I don't necessarily agree, personally, with their chosen language - it is too easily misunderstood, as your own comment plainly shows - but I do grasp that their intent is simply to be heard, without placing a value judgement on themselves or other women. It's also a recognition that many people fought hard for women to have greater autonomy when it comes to their own bodies, and shameful whispers will be a weak defense against the unceasing efforts to ban all abortion access. If every woman received the message that she is not permitted to feel or express anything but shame, regret, and self-loathing for the choice she made, then a great deal of the fight is already lost.
Poverty (Florida)
I don't believe in abortion. I also don't believe that the government has any right to tell a woman she can't have one. Further, defunding Planned Parenthood only affects economically disadvantaged women. As one commenter noted, wealthy women have always been able to get an abortion. Wealthy women could go to the doctor with "troubles" have a D and C and it was over. If abortion is illegal, wealthy women will still get abortions. Poor women will not be able to.
Mary Kay McCaw (Chicago)
Good for these women for forcing dialog. The right to a SAFE, AFFORDABLE termination of pregnancy should be available for all women. Period. I wonder how many of Donald Trumps "women" have had abortions because of him (or any of the other candidates for that matter). Let's bring that question to the debates. The health and safety of women should be paramount. We cannot let hypocritical, small, l minded MEN bomb us back to the 1950's and the world of coat hanger abortions.
Clare (<br/>)
I applaud the women coming forward at this hashtag. The political discussion on abortion will never evolve into something based on rationality and reality until we acknowledge that the women who have abortions are family, friends and neighbors and not immoral monsters.
And for those of you who don't like abortion? Well, for one thing, don't have one. Hypocrisy is rarely an effective sales pitch. For another, do something that actually works, like supporting comprehensive sex education for children, readily available, effective birth control, and a strong social safety net so women don't have abortions because of finances. Standing outside an abortion clinic shouting and waving a sign, or calling a woman a baby killer on twitter may make you feel morally superior, but reality (oh, that nasty word again) shows it's never stopped a single abortion. Why are traffic fatalities down over the last few decades? Because we've morally excoriated drivers to be more safe? Nope. It's because of seat belts and air bags. Let's take this discussion out the realm of rampant moralizing and get it grounded in facts. It might actually change something.
jacrane (Davison, Mi.)
Would really like to know where they got the figures that 1 of 3 women have had an abortion. I've been a woman all my life and know that's not true of the women I know.
Susie (Cincinnati)
And there are other groups of women who know lots of women who have terminated a pregnancy. (And since the point of this group is to encourage Women who can to speak out, I am willing to bet there are women you know who have had an abortion and told no one.) So the fact that you don't personally know someone is irrelevant. All abortions are reported to the CDC. Pre Roe v Wade, only the illegal abortions of poor women who presented to the ER afterwards were counted. Those who managed their infections or bleeding post illegal abortion were not counted. Neither were the "D & Cs" of wealthy and middle class women.
Pat (St Paul, MN)
One in three? Hard to believe.
Janis (Ridgewood, NJ)
It is no one's business !
ellen (<br/>)
Brilliant. I applaud this effort to destigmatize it -- and perhaps more women, if they feel more open about talking about it (remember, being homosexual was at one time, and might still be in certain circles, a hidden attribute. word chosen intentionally) will make people realize that the act itself, the surgery, and the whole thing are not nearly as dramatic as those who are opposed want us to believe.

The anti abortion movement's rhetoric is so much more vociferous and powerful than those who are actively involved in keeping it safe, legal, and who have experienced it.

I count myself among those who are grateful for the opportunity to have had a legal abortion. As a young grad student, my unplanned unexpected unmarried pregnancy was not something I was willing to endure -- unemployed, full time student, only 21 at the time, with the then boyfriend having just moved to another continent. BEST THING I EVER DID.

Neither an appendectomy or tonsillectomy are considered shameful. even though abortion has been legal in ny since 1970, how many women do you know volunteer this info? How many do so, cheerfully, over a glass of wine? "Hi, Mary, how are you? what's new?" "oh, you know -- Bartender -- I'll have a chardonnay please -- Just got back from my second abortion. It was a nice one this time. Much nicer artwork in the procedure room."

Keep it legal. Keep it safe. Keep your lousy proposed laws out of my uterus.
Aunt Essie (Virginia)
If men were able to become pregnant in our patriarchal (or any patriarchal) society, abortion would be a sacrament or, at the very least, celebrated--much like we celebrate (sometimes worship) our dead military "heroes." Somehow it's a "holy" thing to kill our "enemies" along with other people who happen to be in the way (think drones).
KMW (New York City)
Shouting to others that you had an abortion is ridiculous and it seems to me that these two women who started this phenomenon want to use this tactic to further their careers. Abortion is nothing to celebrate as you are taking the innocent life of a baby and that is not something in which to be proud. I know women who have had abortions and they have told me they were so sorry. If someone had encouraged them to keep the baby, they would have done so. We need to do more to discourage abortion and save lives.
Mr. Gadsden (US)
Kill lions in Africa. Shame the dentists.
Kill a fox, beaver, bear, etc. to make a fur coat, rug, etc. Shame on hunters, consumers, and sportsmen/women.
Kill babies in America (with "less crunchy methods.") Celebrate the abortion.
Sell baby parts (But "not for profit, for research"). Get paid over $500,000 a year.
Conservatives are hypocrites? Liberals, look in the mirror.
Bion Smalley (Tucson, AZ)
A fertilized egg is NOT a baby. A partially formed fetus is NOT a baby. The idea that these are babies is purely religious and has no basis in fact, and no place in a country that separates Church and State.
Chelle (Mississippi)
Humans are not on the endangered species list last time I checked...
Susan (Fairbanks, AK)
I don't tweet so I'm responding here...I'm old enough to wish abortion was legal about 3 years earlier when a pregnancy ruined my life. I have also befriended two different women, one who chose to give her child up for adoption and another who in-a-few-years'-more-modern-time had an abortion. Each decision was right for each of them.. I had no choice. Thank GOoDness for Planned Parenthood and NO MAN (Especially a priest!!!) has a right to weigh in on decisions about me and procreation. Just like fluorine in the water supply...there should be an anti-procreation additive to which people could apply for the antidote when they conscientiously want to have a child!!! Just kidding about additives to our water supply, but you get my drift?!
Rob (NC)
"I didn't want to bring a child into the world". If the mother is in the world, so is the child.
The unborn is an individual(not a part of the mother's body),is alive, and has a human genetic code. This is the definition of a human being. Abortion is homicide and while some may offer arguments excusing homicide it can never be celebrated.
Kate (NYC)
This is not something that should be in the political arena in the first place.This is a personal and personally moral decision. My right may be someone else's wrong, but it is never my place to make a personal choice for another person.

Could we be a little more Victorian please?
Paul (South Africa)
Abortion is a personal issue. Neither the state nor the church should have any say whatsoever.
Melpub (Germany and NYC)
I would elect neither to whisper nor shout. Talking about these things is a personal decision. Getting congress to listen may involve more money than talking, at any decibel level.
http://www.thecriticalmom.blogspot.com
SQN (NE,USA)
Unwanted children on the whole do not get adopted. They end up in the foster care system for awhile, then the streets, then the jails. The pro-life people never look at the horrors of the foster care systems, they never rescue children from that system. They wallow in their self righteous of saving every fetus then turn their back on the throw away children every where. If every pro life activists were forced to take in foster children, they would crowd vigils for the deserted born, they would exhaust their money and rail against their lot as the sheer numbers overwhelmed them, they would pray for condoms and embrace educated choice and pray in the streets for legal-safe abortion. So many of these people are as rabid for public executions of the many innocent as they splice the films for shock and shame for women-and by all that is holy it is always women who get the attack and poor women at that.
Of course it's pointless, the rate of abortions will never change. Send these role to China for pro-life missionary work. Good luck and God speed with that.
klm (atlanta)
Yup, those right to lifers threaten to kill. Fun bunch.
Cyra Cazim (<br/>)
Abortion is so painful a fact that it makes life a tragedy. Right to choose how to live is more important than having life at all. One is rightful to find peace and respect in life. The most important aspect of abortion is to make a woman sleep under sedation rather than scraping the fetus alive. Abortions happen for many gynae problems. Abortion is a fact of life that we have to face and make a change that is believable. It happens very early in a girl's life. If men need some engagement with women who are not married to men may be they should be a little more polite instead of giving clinical instructions like - I am going to push you on the floor and wrap it around me. SEX is about life and affection. Men can engage with each other. It is the responsibility of a man to make a woman his wife. If this sounds like a Muslim belief then I am only talking to an expanding industrialist who prints euro bonds.
Rebecca Taksel (Pittsburgh, PA)
I believe that nothing changed the attitudes of Americans about gay rights more than individuals coming out to their families and communities. This is similar. Yes, some people feel that both abortion and sexuality are private matters. But those with the courage to speak up must be supported. Congratulations to Bonow and West and to the women who responded with their own stories.
curtis dickinson (Worcester)
Abortion is a topi that maintains a silence until someone wants to attack it even 40 years after becoming a legal medical procedure. Perhaps we need to get rid of the name "abortion." There is too much stigma to it. Call it, a "Getting my life back" procedure.
Ian MacFarlane (Philadelphia, PA)
It is an absolute cultural shame that women feel compelled to have to resort to any thing in defense of this most personal and trying decision. It is hers alone to make and when made should be supported without question.
Binne (New Paltz)
"I realized I had some residual shame, and this was destigmatizing." What? WHAT? This is so far off the rails there's no way to measure it. Some things will haunt you for your whole life. You never, ever get over them. Some of those things just happen to you. Some of them are conscious choices. An abortion is one of those things. It's the death of a child. Lifelong "residual shame" is a wholly appropriate response, as is grief. It colors the entire remainder of your life. May you never outlive it. It may not be murder, and it may have been the right choice for you at the time. But to be proud of having had an abortion? To shout it from the rooftops? That's a special kind of harsh.
hct (emp_has_no_pants_on)
No matter on which side of the abortion debate you fall, there is at least one incontrovertible fact that all can agree on (and no one can deny):

Every commenter here was not aborted by his or her mother.
fast&amp;furious (the new world)
Men just need to stay out of this entirely. It's none of their business. We'll decide for ourselves.
Jay Stebley (Portola, CA)
When men accept their role in conceiving a child in the first place, there might be a change in the climate of the debate. There is some focus on how much say a man has in a woman's pregnancy but there is little on how much responsibility he should bear in the issue of whether a pregnancy should be ended. His responsibility is the woman's welfare. As it is, the men of this society shrug their shoulders until the morality of a termination is brought up. I find most men to have little or no real awareness of how devastating an unplanned pregnancy is to a woman who has little recourse to carry to term. I find most politicians completely ignorant of what happens in the real world of women and utterly devoid of conscience. This should never have become a political football. There's no reason that there should be shouting in any case.
Bruna Barresi (San Francisco,California)
I was a teenager and my period was very late. I was getting all the info, I was going to have an abotion. Period. That was the only sure thing in my life. I was devasted, I was crying, trying to find support from my teenage female friends.
My period came, I was alone studying in London. I was so sure to have an abortion as I had never been sure of anything in my life. The only reason why it did not happen is because my period came, or maybe a early natural abotion.
In my country, Italy, and in England, abotion is covered by national health medical system. I could not sympathize more with women that find themselves in the position to have an abotion. It is a very tough place, very hard, very sad, extremely painful. Nobody should be judged because of it.
Stephen Gianelli (Crete, Greece)
The decision to have, or not to have, an abortion is uniquely personal, private (indeed, the right to have an abortion stems from the right of privacy enshrined in the Constitution), and belongs to the woman in question alone. I am quite sure that the vast majority of women who have elected to terminate their pregnancies did so with reluctance and after painful deliberation. This is not something to be "outed", "proud of", owned or crowed about. It is, and should remain, the sole, private decision of the women in question. No one has the right to interfere with the decision to abort and no one has a right to attempt to invade the privacy of the women involved.
Ed (Wichita)
'Pro Life' twitterers now threatening the lives of women who simply exercise their freedom of speech. Isn't this evidence of the emptiness of 'Pro Life?'
hct (emp_has_no_pants_on)
"One of the final hurdles is getting it into people's heads that the reason for an abortion doesn't matter"

More ends-justifying-the-means movement of what have become relativistic values and morals in society through sound-bite and 140-character tweets. Less critical thinking and discussion of the root causes that result in abortions because all that's needed these days is affirmation and confirmation through the group-think numbers of social media. The number of Friends, Retweets, Followers, Thumbs-Up, etc. helps to "de-stigmatize" and shout down what may be a nagging feeling that's there for a reason.
Joshua Tan Kok Hauw (Malaysia)
Abort a baby is like murdering a person who will bring you the greatest joy of life.
It is selfish, abhorrent and heinous.

If you do not want a baby just take precautions but once you get pregnant please do not abort it. How will you feel if you are one of the aborted babies?
Human (Planet Earth)
"How will you feel if you are one of the aborted babies?"

Nothing - because you would not exist.
motherlodebeth (Calaveras County Ca)
Must admit I am troubled that in 2015 so many abortions are being done, considering how hard people fought to make contraception legal, which there are so many reliable methods to choose from. Have always wondered how children feel when they discover their mother aborted an unborn sibling.
CatSunflower (California)
A lot of them feel fine about it. Check out the #AskYourMother hashtag.
judith (SF Bay Area)
I had 2 abortions and while difficult, I feel no shame nor regret because I knew the decisions were right for me and for my family. If other people don't like it, tough. I don't tell them what to do with their bodies and I expect the same respect and privacy when it comes to my own. Enough said.
Ben (Arkansas)
Not with these feminist. Burn your bra and shout out that you killed a child. Must be proud of yourselves.
skanik (Berkeley)
Undoubtedly every abortion is a tragedy
for a human life is lost.

Can anyone explain why we,
as a society do not encourage
Adoptions rather than Abortions.
vbering (Pullman, wa)
Shout your abortion. Unbelievable. Have these women no shame at all?
Ms C (Union City, NJ)
None. Because we have nothing to be ashamed of.
Human (Planet Earth)
Well - the idea of the campaign is exactly to emphasize that there should be no shame - so "no" - and good for them.
A. Gideon (Montclair, NJ)
"...Liberty Pike of Portland, Ore., who works for Oregon Right to Life and posted several Twitter messages last week. “I think the right to life should always trump the right to live as you choose.”"

How very exciting that Liberty Pike is okay with being forced to donate bone marrow, a kidney, a lung, etc. to save someone's life. After all, the right to life trumps her right to live as she'd choose.

...Andrew
Robert T. (Colorado)
Does life begin at conception?

Many people feel it does. But far, far more believe it does not. Our society agrees, in many ways, so we respect a woman's right to choose until a certain point.

Those who believe it does have an obligation to do more than cry out at what they believe is murder. They should also make a principled case that a human life with its own civil protections begins when as early as they say it does.

So far I don't hear any of them saying that.
Justice Holmes (Charleston)
Amazing that those who claim they value life would send death threats to women with whom they disagree. But then those same people support the murder of real live already born doctors so really not a surprise.
Ned Kelly (Frankfurt)
Goodonya ladies for shouting your abortions. Such campaigns are more effective with male participation. Men who have paid for abortions or escorted women against a gauntlet of right-wing Christian intimidators should join in too.
EJB (Queens)
The irony of someone who claims they're "pro-life" sending death threats....
Jane Taras Carlson (Story, WY)
Bless you. Also bless the medical people still brave enough to perform them, especially in the Southern U.S. zone.

Jane Taras Carlson
Harris (New Haven, CT)
Does Michelle Bachman know what "macabre" means?
Mr. Robin P Little (Conway, SC)

From this article: "“A shout is not a celebration or a value judgment; it’s the opposite of a whisper, of silence,” Ms. Bonow said in an interview. “Even women who support abortion rights have been silent, and told they were supposed to feel bad about having an abortion.”"

Ms. Bonow, if you are going to get into politics, at least have the courage of your convictions. What you are doing for the abortion cause is a value judgment. I don't disagree with your values, but, you stepping on your own message with a hedged statement is a waste of your time. Women shouldn't be proud of having abortions, and I doubt very many of them are, but shouting is an aggressive act, done to get somebody's attention, in this case, the opposition. You know, politics is like sports, the best defense is a good offense. Don't be afraid to offend.
MDCooks8 (West of the Hudson)
So I thought Planned Parent hood , does not perform abortion? Well Aemlia Bonow has enlightened me on this... Congress next time do not defund Planned Parenthood, Shut them down....
Indira (United States)
I won't delve into history because many of the NYT readers are extremely and highly intelligent. So I won't discuss Darwin and adaptation...but I will say this..We are changing our evolutionary trajectory and this mess of abortion and women's rights are all hogwash...we are working to fill the coffers of the folks like Ms. Richards who was born with a silver spoon and the folks that want to secure their highly paying jobs. Planned parenthood should only conduct unwanted pregnancies. No need to get into medicaid and reimbursements. This Shout Out to Abortion is conducted by wealthy white women who are in college, come from tea cup families and stock options.Poor women of color and even poor women do not have funds for an abortion. Perhaps Planned Parenthood should allow women to exercise their const. right and allow free abortions. This is another ploy to serve wealthy college educated white women... sorry if I offended anyone...but poor women and women of color do not broadcast their abortions because they have already given birth...Abortions are expensive!!!
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
Planned Parenthood should only "conduct unwanted pregnancies?"

And please, tell us how PP could "allow women to access their const. right and allow free abortions."

You may not realize this, but a major part of why PP and similar organizations exist is because the wealthy white college-student women from "tea cup families," as you put it, have almost always been able to access an abortion, while for years most poor women could not. With money and a discreet doctor, wealthy and connected women were, indeed, able to get abortions prior to Roe v. Wade.

It is the poor women - the ones least equipped, in every sense, to handle an unplanned and/or unwanted pregnancy - who lacked access to safe abortion and reproductive services. PP and other groups that use, for example, a sliding scale for fees, are able to aid some women who cannot afford to get an abortion. There are also smaller organizations created to assist women with both the abortion cost and the related fees - such as transportation, accommodation, even childcare or lost income, all of which are increasing as access to abortion is so limited in large areas of the U.S.
Steelmen (Long Island)
When are some of these thugs who threaten others going to be arrested? Please don't tell me they can't be identified.
Anne (New York City)
I suppose in this Age of Exhibitionism, tweeting your abortion counts as therapy. I always thought the abortion rights movement was about the right to have an abortion and the underlying issues were rights to privacy, to medical care, and to equal rights for women. Apparently, it's now about "look at me and validate my decision." If you feel guilty about having an abortion, perhaps you should talk about it in private with a therapist. If it bothers you that other people don't approve of what you did, you should talk about your low self-esteem and need for approval from others with a therapist. What this looks like is an attempt to shove an opinion in other people's faces.
Liz (Seattle, WA)
How about #NoneOfYourBusiness
Whether I or any other woman has had an abortion is between the woman, the father and God. Of course, if you equate abortion with murder, I can see why you wouldn't want to respect a mother's privacy. But I personally think it's not that straightforward. And even murderers deserve a chance for redemption. So lest ye be judged, as they say.
School Librarian (Rhode Island)
Pretty interesting to me how those "defending the rights of the unborn" are sometimes ok with threatening the lives of others!?!
Swatter (Washington DC)
Once again, we see the contradiction from "right to lifers" who want the "abortion women" dead.
AW (Virginia)
Im pro choice all the way. Women's bodies seem to be permanently politicized. That said abortion ts a horrible, sad, tragic thing..you're ending a potential life-and you have to live with that choice. Its not to be taken lightly. I am offended at the disregard of such a serious decision...its not something to be ashamed of, but is not something to brag about either...
c. (n.y.c.)
Why would this be something to be PROUD of? At best it's an agonizing decision and we shouldn't give the idea that this is something people do on a whim or for publicity...
Scott (New York, NY)
If you believe abortion is murder, than would you execute women for having an abortion? Give them life in prison?

Who would want to live in a country where this is the law of the land?
Anon (Corrales, NM)
And if you believe it is murder (I do not) you'll need to build a lot of prisons since one in three women in this country will have an abortion by the time they reach menopause. We are literally surrounded by murderers everywhere we go; the nice lady at church, your child's third grade teacher, even grandma.
bb (berkeley)
These white men who want to limit women's right to abortion are just off the charts. Perhaps they should have vasectomies to avoid this kind of predicament. Support for Planned Parenthood is paramount for women and men.
kathryn (boston)
You know who is not shouting their abortions? All the republican parents who take their daughters to planned parenthood and later criticize the same organization.
Dlud (New York City)
Should rapists feel a "dark cloud"? How about murderers? How about child molesters? Please. Do we take seriously the rants of people who don't take responsibility for their lives?
Dennis B (Frankfort, Ky)
Let me guess, you have never perhaps made a mistake in youth and gotten pregnant or have been raped. A bit different from the other things you mention. So easy to judge what a women should have to put her body through if you know it won't ever happen to you.
beatgirl99 (Pelham Manor, NY)
While I totally support Planned Parenthood, I find women who use abortion as contraception completely deplorable. In Bonow's words, “having an abortion made me happy in a totally unqualified way. Why wouldn’t I be happy that I was not forced to become a mother?”. Seriously, did she use the words "abortion" and "happy" in the same sentence?
Thomas Zaslavsky (Binghamton, N.Y.)
beatgirl99, maybe you don't know every relevant fact about every woman who chooses to have an abortion.
SF Lawyer (SF)
Unless you truly believe a ball of cells has conscious thought and is human in any way -- contrary to all science -- I don't understand why anyone thinks abortion is morally different from any other form of contraception. If you are pro-choice, as you say you are (and I also am), you must agree that a fetus is not a person; at that point, why is an equivalence between abortion and other contraception (between a ball of cells and a single cell (egg/sperm) "deplorable"? It seems you are the one with the more inconsistent position.
ventana56 (Cornwall on hudson NY)
We know enough that equating at the very least a difficult decision and at the most murder with a happy moment is absurd.
Max duPont (New York)
Power to these brave women for speaking up for themselves and their sisters! Never let anyone silence you nor dare attempt to judge you or question your motives in what was surely a difficult personal decision.
Mr. Gadsden (US)
Apparently it's not a difficult decision. Ms. Bonow was "happy" to have an abortion.
MDCooks8 (West of the Hudson)
So should children born in today's society feel extra special that they were not aborted?
Guapoboy (Earth)
Shout your selection to become a survivor?
Alberto (New York, NY)
Children should neither be accidents nor a mini-me to make yourself feel important and deserving of duplication.
Children need to planned carefully so they can be supported and raised well enough to have the opportunity of a good life, and if you know you are likely to pass your serious biological defects to a child you should not have children who are likely to suffer because of that.
ventana56 (Cornwall on hudson NY)
Absolutely; and with the same sort of degraded shame we can imagine freed slaves felt respective of their enslaved brothers and sisters. Because, they were "owned," and someone else's decision released or bound them; someone else's choice, their voices were silenced.
Reader (Westchester, NY)
I work with the incarcerated. Can I shout for the people that weren't aborted but SHOULD have been?

I work with people every day who were born to parents unable or unwilling to raise them, yet did not choose adoption, in part because of cultural norms, in part because other relatives claimed they would help but didn't, and in part because it's not always as easy to give up a newborn once you hold it in your arms.

Sorry, I would rather never have been born than had some of their lives. I know one person in her fifties who is completely illiterate and dying of a very painful cancer behind bars. Others have serious mental illnesses with psychosis and cannot seem to get better even with medication and therapy. Almost all came to drug use as pre-pubescent children; most have been sexually exploited; many have done violent crimes.

And these people have their own children, many of whom they can't raise.

People who are against abortion see a cute little baby that they think will be glad to have been born. I see adults that wish they hadn't been born. Even the adults who have made it out of this cycle have told me- no child should go through what I went through. And they're right.
Reader (Canada)
Looking at all of this from Canada (abortion is finished here as an issue; if you want one, you have one); and on a day of another deadly mass school shooting in the U.S. (we enjoy strict gun control), I confess that America just bewilders me.
Capt. Fantastic (Boston, Ma)
If you're so easily bewildered, better just stick to salmon fishing and hockey.
Rimbaud (Chicago)
For the anti-abortion crowd life begins at conception and ends at birth. How many have adopted a child? How many have raised an adopted child successfully to a happy adulthood? How dare these people so badly cast their stones? Are they also protesting against capital punishment? Or does that not matter...shouldn't it if all life is so "sacred"... and what about the life of a 15 year old with an unwanted pregnancy. Or the woman in an abusive relationship? Or the family struggling to support the children who are already here? Or the woman who wants the child but has a spontaneous miscarriage and then needs a D&C to save her own life so she can be mother to already born children. Some of the laws currently contemplated or on the books would make that impossible also...all in the name of the sanctity of human life. If it is so sacred, why don't we as a society and all those protesters out there take better care of the Already Born?
Jade (Oregon)
“Even women who support abortion rights have been silent, and told they were supposed to feel bad about having an abortion.”
Abortion is a serious thing. Even if you believe that a woman should have the right to prioritize her happiness over the life of her unborn child, is it really so unreasonable that she might have to suffer some negative feelings about the situation? Some remorse for the choices that led her to terminate a pregnancy that would have resulted in a human being who could have gone on to be someone's beloved wife or mother or mentor?
Sorry, but there are some things in life you should feel bad about, whether or not you're legally allowed to do them.
May (CT)
There's nothing to feel bad about looking out for the best interest of your viable children. Raise a severely disabled 3rd child and get back to me on it. The older kids will forever take a back seat to the needs of the disabled child, and when the parents die, they will be responsible for caring for that child. It's a tough decision, but not one to feel bad about.
Thomas (New York)
Every human being is a *possibility*. It might go on to be someone's beloved wife, etc., or it might become a sadistic wife beater or a school shooter.
Thomas (New York)
Every baby is a *possibility*. It might go on to be someone's beloved wife, etc., or it might become a sadistic wife beater or a school shooter. Its chances of becoming a happy and productive person are much less if it's born to a mother who can't take care of it.
Gail (Florida)
I've always been pro-choice, but this cavalier way of speaking about terminating a pregnancy makes my blood run cold. Sex isn't just recreation like riding a bike or reading a book. It's also how you create another human being. Why are so many people comfortable sharing their bodies with people they wouldn't want to have a child with?

Women have abortions for a variety of reasons and I wouldn't take away their autonomy but, in my humble opinion, getting pregnant by "the wrong guy" and having an abortion isn't something to brag about.
Mia (Manhattan)
Nobody in this article is bragging about getting an abortion, the whole point is to not have a culture of shame and silence surrounding a sometimes very necessary medical procedure.
MDCooks8 (West of the Hudson)
We all have are moments of ignorance and hopefully most have learned from their mistakes...so in one sense there is a cure for ignorance, either by education or experience, however there is a saying "There is no cure for stupidity" and these women have taken the cake and surely have thrown out the baby with the bath water...
AVR (Baltimore)
I'm sorry, abortion is not something to be celebrated. I support a woman's right to abortion but at its best the procedure is an undesirable, necessary evil when there are no better alternatives. Championing it is indeed macabre and completely tone deaf.
Thomas (New York)
“A shout is not a celebration or a value judgment; it’s the opposite of a whisper, of silence,” said Ms. Bonow.
Dale (Wisconsin)
We continue to hear those hawking over and over about the fetus, and it never had a chance to walk, see, talk, or experience life.

Perhaps the mother is indeed in the best position to know if that fetus will be loved, have enough of her time to care for it in the Utopian way that these pro-fetus supporters continue to profess.

I would agree to minimize abortion, mainly through education of what the facts of human reproduction are, and cheap, widely available and effective birth control methods. But until that time comes along, or when it does and for those occassions where the mother knows that the fetus would suffer a life that she would not want it to endure, having the option available, always, will be necessary.
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
Terminating a pregnancy is the kind of choice a woman makes when her back is against the wall.

Abortion is very, very sad and difficult thing. But just because it is, that doesn't mean that an abortion must never be an option, or that it's always the wrong option. I'm sorry, but the human race doesn't work that way.

It's about choice, yes. But more than that, it's about the net-benefit calculus that every single one of us engages in as human beings.

In other words, there are times in life where we have to make excruciating decisions. Where we have to forfeit something that matters deeply to us, because hanging on to whatever that thing is will not give us the same security that letting it go will.

So we have to make that really hard choice. For many, that really hard choice is to have an abortion.

But let's not fool ourselves. The morality of choices like that can't be political. Not in a world such as ours where we still rely on dysfunctional politics to decide whether or not our States should execute certain people. Or whether to go to war. Or whether to drop bombs on people, or strike them with drones. Or whether we should continue carrying out devastating medical experiments on great apes, who are 96% similar to us, in an effort to advance the human race.

What to do?
You weigh your options. And then you make the hard choice.

I would venture to say that for most, abortion is the kind of choice a woman makes when her back is against the wall.

Life can
Sabine (Los Angeles)
By the way - this isn't new. There was a famous and scandalous cover story in Germany's biggest magazine ("Der Stern") in 1971 where German women - from movies stars to teachers, artists and lawyers - admitted to an abortion publicly. Not just scandalous but dangerous as well because it illegal in those years. It was a protest against the strict anti-abortion law in Germany. It caused an incredible uproar, applause from the liberals and disgust especially from the older right-wing people. I totally loved it - it was exactly the provocation and the wake-up call especially the men needed. They are still talking about that cover. And the abortion law in Germany isn't great either today! In short, the abortion issue will never be resolved because it's not about the love for children but the hate of too independent women!
jprfrog (New York NY)
If those who are so keen to save "innocent" life in the womb showed equal concern for nurturing that life (providing prenatal care, parental leave, assuring good nutrition, education, health care, etc.) after it is born, I would take their plaints more seriously. And if they were concerned to provide contraception and instruction in how to use it to all teenagers so as to prevent unwanted pregnancies, I would join them.

I don't expect anything like that to happen any time soon, later, or in fact ever.
MDCooks8 (West of the Hudson)
If a woman chooses to have an abortion based on non medical reasons, why should health care insurance cover this, when this is selective surgery?

This raises another question, if selective abortion is covered by a group plan based on the Afford Health Care, why should these costs be absorbed by people to which some find abortion wrong, especially selective abortion...
jaime s. (oregon)
Are you saying you want to limit the woman's right to make the decision for herself?
I feel resentful at the costs for vascular and heart surgeries for smokers, but I would never try to impede their access to medical care. But then my religious beliefs do not lead me curtail other peoples' access to healthcare.
Mia (New York)
I find exorbitant military spending wrong and believe that obese people should take better care of themselves so they aren't such a huge drain on healthcare. My taxpayer dollars still go to both of these things. I just don't raise a huge fuss about it because I realize that my scope of understanding doesn't encompass all knowledge and experiences, and there may be many people in various circumstances who need these services.
Human (Planet Earth)
By your reasoning, I guess we should also stop providing insurance coverage and affordable healthcare lung cancer (generally caused by smoking) and treatment for diabetes type 2 (generally caused by unhealthy and excessive eating and overweight).
Elizabeth I (New York City)
If this country doesn't get a grip on serious discussions about serious issues it is doomed to go the way of the Romans. Abortion would not be the first choice of any woman. The right to decide what to do in the event of an unwanted pregnancy is personal and profound and should be inviolate. Shame on us if we can't have this discussion in a more dignified forum than Twitter. It is no wonder at all that there are mass shootings as a matter of course in the United States. We can't talk about anything important without turning the discussion into a circus for fools on both sides of the debate.
Sanjeevani (Philadelphia)
Here is my abortion story.

I recently had an abortion. I am married to a lovely person who is a responsible partner, and a father to our 3 year old. We are both in our later 30s and both are PhDs. My husband lost his postdoctoral position which pays only $45K/Year, and we were living on my salary of $45K for 2 years in a city where the cost of living index is 106. My husband could not find a job for his expertise and had to develop new expertise, so there was no income from him and we had to pay the day care anyways. Point is, we were living on our puny savings to live a normal basic life. I love and respect any life form and have been vegetarian all my life.

Then suddenly, without we planning it I was pregnant. We did the math.. we would not have the money for second child. With a very heavy heart I had to go through this. I miss my unborn child everyday and imagine how she would have looked today!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, what put me in this situation?
1. in 1972 republicans vetoed a rule that would not give subsidy to childcare centers. If we were in another country where the government takes care of these expenses (ie France/canada) this could have been averted.
2. the way Universities are structured and how postdocs are basically used as slave labors without any prospect of finding a job in real world. etc

I really wish the laws change and become more supportive for parents so that they dont have to go through abortions.
Bohemienne (USA)
Ridiculous to say that the rest of us should subsidize your apparently poor career & financial planning as a way of preventing abortions. Take responsibility for your own life!
L (<br/>)
While I respect your choice I dont' completely agree with it. Where does it say that the government (basically the taxpayers) should subsidize yoru children or anyone else's child? My parents could only afford two children and had only two. They would not expect someone else to take care of them. They made sacrifices and we turned out fine. If you can't afford children please take the steps not to have one. You can walk into any PP and obtaon birth control and condoms. This country has become to comfortable with the nanny state mentality.
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
I wholeheartedly agree with your analysis. Too many people are prone to focusing only on the "save that child" mindset, and think of abortion as something done only by young, unprepared, poor women. They focus in free diapers and baby formula, without seeming to consider just how varied situations can be. Many women who've had abortions are already mothers. Many of them are not wealthy but are ineligible for various benefits and financial support available to low-income individuals. For many of them, it's not the free diapers or baby food or breast pump that are an issue - they can manage that, for the most part. Rather, it's everything else that comes after the baby is born. It's the loss of income, since "leave" is the best we can do and "paid leave" is a luxury many don't have. It's the exorbitant cost of childcare. It's the derailment of plans. *Those* issues are much thornier and more complicated, and many find it easier to reduce the decision to nothing more than delivering that newborn, never fully considering what happens *after.* We do not have a social structure that is equipped to handle those dynamics with flexibility and grace.
Ironically, if we invested more in accommodating policies, many women might feel secure in having another child. In other words, there might be fewer abortions. Unfortunately, many of the anti-abortion hardliners are equally opposed to things like family leave and childcare subsidies/assistance.
May (CT)
This is a hard call. I also don't Tweet. Nor do I publicly share my political opinions or my religious leanings. So to shout out my abortion would be uncharacteristic of how I choose to live my life.
But this has made me think about all of those 20 year olds who may be feeling shame or embarrassment. I want to stand with them, and support them. I want to let them know that I had an abortion and coincidentally years later had a miscarriage at the same stage (which is called a "spontaneous abortion") and both were a blessing. In both cases, something was not right.
I am long past those feelings of shame and embarrassment. I support Planned Parenthood financially, and I would readily admit, even welcome the opportunity to expound upon, my abortion, but I don't usually live out loud in that way.
Tom (Connecticut)
I would hope for more complete and honest discussion across society on reproductive health issues including coercion and unhealthy shame dumped on girls and young women who want to follow through with the natural results of pregnancy. There are substantial resources available to women who want to have babies as well as others to prevent risk of pregnancy either by natural or medical means. In suburban Connecticut as well as much of the country failure to have an abortion is seen as a career killer and often women and men around the young woman will put all types of unhealthy pressure on her to "do the right thing". The right thing is the moral, conscience driven decision, not what is expedient. What seems to be lacking all around on both left and right politically is self-control and moderation.
ebmargit (Oxford, UK)
While I heartily agree with most of your point, there are not "substantial resources" available to women when sex ed is inconsistent at best and outright unscientific at worst; when pre- and post-natal care are exorbitantly expensive; when obtaining birth control is onerous and expensive; when childcare remains so badly unsubsidized that mothers routinely find they can't afford to work; when we still don't have a legally required paid maternity leave of at least 6 months. I am not an enormous fan of abortion, but I will fight very hard for a woman's right to choose because as a mom, I have some inkling of how much of a superhero single moms have to be to make it work. I never had to make that choice because I am not living that life, and therefore I am not qualified to make judgments on those who have had to make that choice. When we put our money where our mouths are - that is to say, when we provide nationalized health care, free birth control, and comprehensive and scientifically informed sex ed, unintended pregnancy rates will drop - and then we won't have so many abortions anyway because there won't be so many unintended pregnancies. The US is the world leader in unintended pregnancy, a direct result of the policies we've enacted and our phobia of addressing sexual health.
WallaWalla (Washington)
I am a man so I am not speaking from experience on this serious issue facing women. Every single female friend, including those who have gone through an abortion, finds the issue deeply personal. There is no such thing as a 'care-free' or 'nonchalant' abortion. It cannot and should not be something deconstructed into 140 characters. This debate speaks more to the inability of social media, twitter in particluar, to be a constructive forum for discussion.
Morgan (Atlanta)
I had an interesting discussion with a male acquaintance about abortion. He believes strongly that it is wrong - that all life is sacred. He's a first responder, so I totally get that. The crux of the matter between us came down to the fact that he thinks "life" begins at conception, and I think it's a blob of cells that may or may not make it to full term. Since the majority of abortions are done well within the first trimester you are in no way talking about a viable human life, in my opinion. Which is just that - my opinion. I don't particularly believe humans have any more of a "right to life" than salamanders, and I'm not a Christian, so where does that leave my right to make choices about my own biology?
Kristine (Illinois)
I assume that man also thinks his sperm is life and makes sure not to kill any of that life.
Adrianne (Massachusetts)
Do they not see the irony when they threaten the life of someone because they had an abortion?
Yoda (DC)
no, they do not.
LastLeaf (Michigan)
Fanatics are who they are because they are incapable of logical, rational thinking. They are filled with self-righteous rage against anyone who refuses to bow to their wishes. Religious fascism is just as insane and dangerous as the strictly political kind. These people would gladly bring back the kind of madness that led to the witch hunts of Salem, if they thought they could get away with it.
Sophia (chicago)
Here's a question: what about those irresponsible men who aren't using condoms?

Women bear the brunt, always.

We get pregnant, men don't. But men impregnate us, then they shame us.

They shame us if we have sex, harass if we don't have sex, especially if we happen to be married to them.

Then if we have a baby we're to blame for that. If we don't have a baby - you guessed it. Shame!

Enough already.

Women, stand up and stand together.

Busybodies: educate your sons. It isn't hard for YOU to prevent unwanted pregnancies.

If you hate abortion so much, don't get your sex partner pregnant.
fromjersey (new jersey)
I've often wondered why there is not a "pill" for men? There's pill's to improve performance, viagra, but not pills to control the unwanted result. Answer is easy, they like to keep the onus on women and wouldn't dare want to mess with their sperm count. It's grossly hypocritical.
Joe (Iowa)
"men impregnate us"

as if you have no choice in the matter?
LastLeaf (Michigan)
We women can thank the patriarchal Judeo-Christian obsession with sex in general, and female sexuality in particular... A male HAS to control female sexuality, otherwise how can he be sure any offspring really has HIS genes? The sad thing is, even in this so-called scientifically advanced time so few people understand that they behave just as compulsively as the apes in the jungle when they blindly follow the anger and hatred still lingering in the primitive part of our brains. The truth shall set you free, yeah verily!! Knowledge and understanding of our natures is what empowers us, NOT blind irrational belief.
BNYgal (brooklyn)
I've had abortions. I am not ashamed. I would have been ashamed to have a child I couldn't raise and even more ashamed to give away that child for adoption. Really, don't have babies if you aren't planning on keeping them.
AVR (Baltimore)
Why not don't get pregnant if you aren't planning on having children. Just a thought.
GMHK (Connecticut)
Just a thought, but if birth control is 99% effective and condoms are 98% effective, why are there close to one million abortions a year? Are people just too lazy or too selfish or what?
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
No. It's that birth control isn't 99% effective, and condoms aren't 98% effective.

And neither birth control or condoms solve for the other main reasons besides unplanned pregnancies that women have abortions:

- Rape
- Incest
- Severe genetic fetal abnormalities
- Mother's health is at significant risk (ex., she is the victim of major trauma or disease, and the fetus can't be saved);

'Lazy' or 'selfish' implies that having an abortion is a cavalier experience for those women that do it. There is too much research out there now that states unequivocally that that is not the case.
C. Hart (San Diego)
Only the intra-uterine device (IUD) has an effective rate of 99%. IUDs must be inserted by a doctor and without insurance, the IUD can cost as much as $600. One brand of IUD must be replaced every five years, another must be replaced every twelve years. Male condoms have an effective rate of only 82% and female condoms effective rate is 79%. See the chart titled Effectiveness of Family Planning Methods at cdc.gov/reproductivehealth. Also, consider this: most women want to have two children. That means those women must correctly and consistently use an effective contraceptive for three decades of their lives.
Montreal Moe (WestPark, Quebec)
If birth control is only 99% effective I would suggest that most unintended pregnancies are not aborted or is a million abortions a year a huge underestimate.
EsmeK (Michigan)
I prefer to shout out that I received excellent health care from Planned Parenthood. As a graduate student with no health insurance in the mid '90s I had my annual pap smear done at a Planned Parenthood in Indiana. I learned years later that the clinic was a target of hateful people who clearly did not understand that health care includes a variety of services. Helping me when I had no insurance is why I support Planned Parenthood today. I'm sure there are plenty of other young women like myself who are grateful for their service - no matter what it entails.
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
I am one of them, EsmeK. Planned Parenthood is one of the very best and most effective public health programs we have in this country today.

If I ever had the fortune of possessing a winning lottery ticket, they would be hearing from me the very next day.
Morgan (Atlanta)
Yep - me too. Young and uninsured I got my regular physicals, PAP smears, etc. AND my birth control pills at PP. I think I paid a whopping $35 a visit, and got really cheap or possibly free birth control.
rlk (NY)
I am not angry at #ShoutYourAbortion but frankly I think it is confusing.

I can't think of a more personal, private, difficult decision that a woman faces than whether to end her pregnancy. As a man I find it heart-wrenching.

And when it is done, the decision lives on forever somewhere in the woman's heart privately and while she may or may not shout it when it occurs, it is a never ending aspect of her being.

Each woman, and her loved ones, must handle it in their own way. All these ideas of either shout or silence must somehow be broad enough that each woman may make the one decision to best get her on with the rest of her life with the love and understanding all women deserve.
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
I understand where you're coming from, RLK. And you are right - for many women who have abortions, they never want to revisit it ever again, let alone publicly identify that they have had abortions. That is perfectly understandable.

But here is the other side of that:

Women can have abortions today ONLY because so many brave women (and men) before them spoke out. Not necessarily about having abortions themselves, but about the need for such a procedure to be widely available and legal for all women. They relentlessly pressed the issue and brought it into the mainstream so that women could finally begin to shed the shame and stigma that came with having an illegal, but oftentimes very necessary, procedure. And it became law.

You often have to fight a battle more than once to win it. Just about everywhere in the country, abortion rights are receding. And most women are remaining silent.

I understand that a woman must handle an abortion in her own way. But the fact that she was able to even have an abortion at all means that she also has a responsibility to ensure that this right remains available for other women.

These women don't have to shout it from the rooftops, or do what the women in the article are doing. But, at the very least, they should be supporting pro-life politicians and causes. And they should STOP voting for politicians that want to return us to a time when women's reproductive lives and choices were the property of their male partners and/or the State.
Estrellita (Santa Fe)
How about: the birth control failed -- I didn't want to be pregnant -- I had a legal safe early-term abortion. It wasn't heart-wrenching. It was a medical procedure. I was very glad not to be pregnant. It's not a decision that on lives on forever somewhere in my heart privately.
Portland (Oregon)
All my medical decisions are private but my abortion is not an never ending part of my being, to use your words. It's a procedure.
Fred White (Baltimore)
It's great to shout your abortion on the Net. I'm all for that. But it's even greater to VOTE for abortion rights by voting a straight Democratic ticket next year. Too bad so many women won't do that, and by not doing that will vote to end abortion rights for all their sisters. And too bad some women who support abortion rights for women will be too lazy or clueless to vote to defend these rights, too. You can be sure that hardly any women opposed to abortion rights will make the mistake of not voting her conscience. It's time for women supporting these rights to get as serious politically, by any legal means necessary, to fight for them, because you can be sure their female opponents will use every legal method there is to end abortion in America.
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
Right on, Fred.

Although I have to say, it seems unlikely that women who have had abortions will get politically active on behalf of other women that may need the same procedure some day. I really hope I'm wrong, but in the years since Roe v Wade, we have certainly not seen that to be the case.

I'm sorry to say it, but I think abortion will have to be made illegal in this country before the real support for it will be revealed. Right now, most women are just content to allow the few female activists who are brave enough to speak out on the issue to stand alone. There is no sisterhood.

But when women begin losing the rights that the women's movement fought so hard for in the 60s and 70s, then maybe American women will also lose their complacency that allowed this regression to happen.

Hopefully they will also shed whatever sense of entitlement (or denial) that they have now that makes them think they will never be told by a doctor that they need an abortion ASAP in order to save their lives... or that they will never have a young daughter/niece/ friend who has been the victim of rape or incest and now needs an abortion... or that they will never have an unborn fetus with such severe genetic abnormalities that it will never survive outside the womb...

Nope, these things will never, ever happen to another woman ever again, so abortion can never be justified.

And that's how things that were rightfully earned - through the due process of law - can one day be taken away.
Knorrfleat Wringbladt (Midwest)
Evangenital "Christians" and their right wing "supporters" are evil angry hornets. They are devoid of examinable moral reasoning. Issuing death threats while calling themselves pro life is an Orwellian gymnastic beyond explanation.
MBene (Mountain View, California)
My college friend recently passed away at the age of 67. Her life was a little harder and a little lonelier because she chose, almost as a political act, to have an abortion when she was 21. The conditions weren't ideal, so... She is not here to say it anymore, but this is what she shared with me. I'm shouting that.
Jim S. (Cleveland)
And she never met men after that? Abortion isn't sterilization. And meeting eligible men is an easier proposition if one does not have a young child in the mix.

If she decided in the following twenty years or so that she wanted to have a child, she could have.
Qui (Brooklyn)
Well maybe her life was fuller and more her own, ever think of that. And, maybe if the conditions were unsafe or unsanitary that is on the monsters who rape women and force them to have their babies as a form of enslavement. So, I'm shouting out maybe she lived a better life and you should be prouder of her than you are.
lydgate (Virginia)
If women who tweet about their abortions are receiving threats, why aren't those sending the threats being arrested and prosecuted?
Eric (Portland)
All life is precious.

If we found a single-celled organism on Mars, everyone would go crazy.

Refer to an unborn human child, and people will change the definition to suit their lifestyle. As a Christian and a Biologist I am appalled that someone could be proud enough to shout such an action.
Robert F (NY)
Yes, all life is precious. I can hardly sleep, thinking of the countless human eggs destroyed every day from menstruation.
Reader (Westchester, NY)
If all life is precious, do you refuse to use antibiotics?
Matt Mulligan (NYC)
This is some pretty nutty logic here. Do you not take antibiotics when you get sick?
Moira (Ohio)
I've had two abortions and never regretted either one. I had a legal medical procedure done - twice. And before any self-righteous person claims I was being irresponsible, I wasn't. I was on birth control and it failed. I mention my abortions whenever the subject comes up, why shouldn't I? People are always shocked and seem embarrassed, which I find amusing. I'm not ashamed of my abortions, why should I be? Again, I had a legal medical procedure done. I love the premise of #ShoutYourAbortion - it's about time we pushed back against all the shaming and downright hatred towards women who have had abortions. More women (and men too!) need to speak out loud and strong! I've had two abortions and I have no regrets!
Joe (Iowa)
Those two babies might have a few regrets.
Judy (Deerfield Beach, Florida)
Why do people think they have the right to dictate the choices of others? The ONLY one qualified to make the decision tohave an abortion is the woman who is pregnant. Finger pointing, accusations of "baby killer", the government insisting that laws against it are proper and all other outside interference to women's choices are unbelievable. Are these people going to help raise the child? Are they going to contribute to the woman having the child should she need financial support? Are they going to pay for the child's schooling or any other significant needs? NO. So mind your own business. Live your own life and do what you want; but try to remember your opinions and beliefs should not be foisted off on others.
jhussey41 (Illinois)
Yikes. I'm sure proud I ended my pregnancy? So much for keeping this between a woman and her doctor. Whoopie. This might rank as the worst idea ever.
Qui (Brooklyn)
A woman should be proud of the decisions she has to take that no one will make for her and will try to prevent for their own personal, possibly perverse, and undoubtedly political reasons.
professor (nc)
Regardless of your political affiliation or religious beliefs, the only recommended response to a woman faced with an unintended pregnancy is sympathy, empathy and compassion.
Middle-Class Mom (Montclair NJ)
I am so conflicted by this campaign. I am pro-choice and pro-privacy and I believe that Roe v. Wade was a good and sound decision. But I am personally very challenged by the idea that abortions should be part of the mainstream and accepted as any other medical procedure. Abortion is a deeply personal and complicated decision. I never had an abortion and I have 2 kids - but I am an adult adoptee. I do not rejoice in women having abortions because I do not rejoice in the conditions that bring this choice about. I border on wishing no one had an abortion - but the reality is being pregnant and raising kids is a very serious undertaking for anyone under any circumstance. Unless I choose to raise your unborn kid myself, I should stay out of your decisions. Still, I wish we weren't taking on campaigns that appear to celebrate abortion. It's not shameful to have one - but it isn't something you rejoice in either. It's a tough decision that you and only you must make peace with.
Qui (Brooklyn)
You are imposing your existential complex on being rejected as an adoptee on innocent women. Don't. You sound like a good person.
rp (cleveland)
It's important for women to have the option to terminate an unwanted pregnancy. This is a constitutionally protected right but one wouldn't know that the way the "pro-fetus" brigade continue to try & shame women who make this decision. Women need to stand up & make their voices heard. There is a real risk that the next presidential election will see several appointments to the Supreme Court. If a republican wins, the right to have an abortion may well be overturned.
Qui (Brooklyn)
I am with you rp. You are correct.
Laura (US)
Has anyone ever collected statistics on the adoption rates among "pro-lifers"?

It seems adoption is a perfect solution, for other people to do. Or maybe they are too busy protesting abortion clinics to get involved in practicing what they are preaching, for other people.
Sarah (Boston)
I haven't seen those statistics either way, but for what it's worth, any healthy infant placed up for adoption in this country usually has a waiting list of prospective parents waiting for them. Older kids and disabled children are often harder to place, but your typical unplanned-pregnant mother would generally have a pretty easy time finding a home for her child, if she made that choice. I'm not sure what good there would be in pro-lifers displacing families who desperately wanted adoptive children, simply in order to "practice what they preach".
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
Laura, there are actually a lot of reputable statistics out there that show that religious women report having abortions at about the same rate as women who report having no religious affiliation at all:

http://www.guttmacher.org/in-the-know/characteristics.html

(This is just one example of the many statistics that are available on this subject).

There is a ton of hypocrisy in the abortion debate, there is no doubt about that. It upsets me that too many women who have had abortions somehow feel no obligation to ensure that this right remains available for future generations of women who will unfortunately become victims of rape or incest; or they will face the devastation of having an unborn fetus with genetic abnormalities so severe that survival outside of the womb is impossible; or they will find themselves being told by a doctor that they have to have an abortion ASAP in order to save their own lives. And then there are those who will become pregnant despite their best efforts not to, and who will conclude that an abortion is the right choice for they and their families.

But too many women have been deluded into thinking that none of these circumstances will EVER happen to them. And so they are content with giving up this right that women fought and died to bring about for later generations.

Adoption is not for everyone. It is a very different choice than having an abortion, and one can't be substituted for the other.
Philip Rozzi (Columbia Station, Ohio)
This is MRS. Most of those protesters are not adopting the children who need to be adopted -- they are white people who couldn't open their homes to siblings of color, because there aren't infant-in-arms babies, black or white to adopt, but toddlers and older siblings who have had to be removed from extremely dysfunctional and dangerous home situations; perhaps children who have already been scarred by bad home lives who act out and need more than loving parents to help correct that situation. Targeting people who are seeking a medical procedure is easier than putting their money where their mouths and protest signs are. I'd love to have seen the protest signs at hospitals that routinely removed the tonsils and adenoids of the people in my generation, for whom those two surgeries were routine in our childhoods; now that would have been a real hoot!
Mos (North Salem)
I'm curious if maybe the problem here is a lack of education and basic understanding of human biology.

In general, there is no real confusion about how babies and pregnancy come about. All of this talk of multiple abortions, abortions while already having a child, my sympathy for the inconvenience of being pregnant diminishes when this inconvenience - which resulted in another living being - was almost always entirely preventable.

Grown up decision to have sex should be accompanied by the grown up decision to prevent unwanted pregnancies. Rocket surgery this is not.
MDCooks8 (West of the Hudson)
And some act surprised on how or when they became pregnant ...as though evil fairy dust was cast upon them...
Portland (Oregon)
A good idea is to familiarize yourself with the failure rates of birth control.
Jessica (Sewanee, TN)
Forcing women to have children they do no want is nothing short of thuggish oppression. Women have a Constitutional right to manage what happens with their bodies, before and after sex. Denying women the right to bring an early end to an unwanted pregnancy contributes to a dysfunctional society, where children are mistreated by people who are already overwhelmed, who may be ill-equipped to be parents, and/or who simply do not want to be parents. Those children grow up being abused, neglected, and in emotional pain; it is not surprising that many turn out to be sadly, often severely, damaged. Forcing women to give birth to children who are not wanted just makes everyone suffer. What is the sense of that?
Qui (Brooklyn)
I agree - and would say that forcing women to have babies they do not want it far more painful and brutal than rape itself, as heinous as that act is. Which makes those that further and enable this perverse violence and subjugation of women all that more disgusting and below contempt.
MFW (Tampa, FL)
The absence of shame or guilt over the taking of an innocent human life is most certainly not evidence of moral superiority. The 20th century proved that those most immune to guilt over the slaugher of innocents are no heros. As an added point, the recently released videos are not "showing officials of the group’s discussing providing fetal tissue for research." The officials are shown bargaining for the price of fetal tissue, bragging about abortion procedures that preserve fetal organs so as to get maximum price, and generally giggling about a procedure that makes most individuals sick.

The emergence of individuals such as these two, (what did you call them, a "writer" and "bartender"?) is surely a sign of how our discourse has slipped. You've given them their moment of fame. They would best have been best left in their dark anonymity.
Qui (Brooklyn)
Thank you God for weighing in with your opinion. But, you betray your deal with the Devil when you lapse into your psychotic little tirade on the falsified Planned Parent videos that show basically fabricated propaganda and lies. Further you mischaracterize the illegally recorded dialogue that is distorted by editing and voice overs. This completely discredits any point you might think that you are making.
Erin A. (Tampa Bay Area)
Lindy West is a well-respected writer - not "writer," and not living in "dark anonymity" - who has faced horrific and terrifying harassment from online "trolls" on a near-constant basis. I suggest checking out an episode of This American Life that she appeared in not long ago, in which she recounts an especially awful campaign of harrasment against her, and confronts one of her main "trolls" about why he was so vicious and awful to a woman he'd never met and did not know. Someone posing as her beloved deceased father on Twitter in order to attack her is not at all surprising - similar things have happened to her in the past, as they have also happened to other female writers online - a barrage of death threats, a release of their home addresses and personal information, an organized campaign of harassment and intolerable viciousness.
The discourse has slipped, but the slippage lies with the people who would deem them worthy of such cruelty and mistreatment. Disagreement is one thing. Anonymous death threats is quite another. For that matter, so are deceptively edited, illegally recorded videos designed to distort reality to fit the goals of someone at any cost, no matter how dishonest and misleading their efforts may be.
AACNY (NY)
Considering almost half of all unintended pregnancies are caused by not using birth control already in a woman's possession, it's hard to understand why anyone would shout this out.

If anything, those who have actually used their birth control effectively should be shouting "#Didn'tGetPregnant" or "#TookControlofMyBody".
Swatter (Washington DC)
You're missing the point: it's not "abortion pride" but rather making others (those who've had abortions, not had, are in favor of it being legal, are against) aware of the numbers, situations, experiences, feelings, reasons of those who've chosen to have abortions. Overall, it could result in better dialogue and understanding, better policy, better behavior - e.g., those who 'fess up about not using their birth control may inspire others to use theirs more responsibly.
AACNY (NY)
The very large number of abortions should "inspire" every woman to be more diligent about her birth control. It shouldn't inspire more women to have them.
Mor (California)
A woman only has a certain number of eggs. Each egg is genetically unique. If I use contraception, the egg that could have been fertilized is flushed out of my body. The child who could have been born is not born. If I use contraception and it fails, the egg is fertilized. Then I have an abortion. The child who could have been born is not born. The outcome is identical in both cases. So what is the difference between them? A fetus has no more self-awareness than a gamete, especially if the abortion is performed early, so pain is not an issue. The only problem is theological, if you believe that the "ensoulment" occurs before birth. I do not. So I fail to see why the moral distinction you draw between contraception and abortion should have any relevance to me.
Tina (California)
There you go. Ms. Pike of Oregon Right to Life thinks that women should be forced to continue pregnancies. I am a mother and have never had an abortion, but I can't imagine someone forcing me to carry a pregnancy to term, if I were in a bad situation. Humans make hard choices all the time and this is one of the hardest of choices, but I think it's the height of arrogance to think women should be forced to give up their agency.
AACNY (NY)
"forced to continue pregnancies"

versus

"prohibited from ending a life".

It's all in the perspective. A lot of women cannot imagine taking the life of the unborn child growing inside them.

As for being "forced" to behave a certain way, we force people all the time to behave as we believe they should. We have clean air laws and make it illegal to dump harsh chemicals in waterways. We don't simply say, "If you don't like contaminated water, just don't pollute yourself or only drink bottled water. And war protestors aren't told, "If you don't like war, don't become a solider."
Empirical Conservatism (United States)
If the pro-lifers lose shame and fear as their most fearsome weapons, they're done.

So they're done.
Fred White (Baltimore)
Good point. The puritans trying to America control with shame and fear don't know what generation they are dealing with when it comes to Millennials. Shame and fear didn't even work very well with Boomes and Gen-X'ers, but with Millennials? I don't think so. So, right, they're done.
richard schumacher (united states)
Good. This is a necessary step toward a world in which abortion is always legal, safe, and rare, and in which no woman need ever rely on someone else's opinion or permission to get one.
Eddie T (Jesup, GA)
Legalizing abortion was supposed to make it safer, but this is not the consensus among the fetuses that I have spoken to lately.
Edward Lindon (Taipei, Taiwan)
That's very clever. However, foetuses do not have hopes, dreams, fears, ambitions, a sense of self, civil rights, legal obligations, a place in history, enduring familial relationships or the ability to be exploited, oppressed, victimized, demonized, bullied or abused. In other words, they are not persons.

The decision to have an abortion is a serious ethical decision, but it is completely unlike most such decisions in that there is no hurt party, at least not scientifically, legally or (in secular thinking) morally. When women who do not believe in the existence of souls think about whether to have an abortion, there is no reason for them to consider anyone who is not an actually existing person.

In all cases where it is not mere unconsidered sentimentality and metaphor, the right to life argument is a religious argument. Once this is accepted, it becomes very easy to see that this argument cannot play a guiding role in public and political life.
ZL (Boston)
I'm not sure what this comment is supposed to mean. The first clause is almost certainly true because certified doctors are performing the abortions. You have not talked to any fetuses, so I'm really not sure what the second half is supposed to be. Yes, the fetus dies. That is the unfortunate consequence of an abortion.

The middle of the road position that we should support in this country is that abortion is fully legal with aim of having the number of abortions that will be performed per year being zero.
Elizabeth Guss (New Mexico)
And that would be NONE. Since you are male, you have no clue. Pregnancy and birth is far more dangerous than a first trimester abortion. Fetal tissue at 12 weeks has no capacity for life -- or speech -- on its own. Slavery is not permissible under our Constitution, and as a human rights issue. Why should any woman or girl be forced to bear a child if that is not what she wishes? She should not, purely and simply put.
Peter L (Portland, OR)
Bravo to these women. An abortion is nothing to be ashamed of, and women who choose to have them should not be compelled to explain why. Not everyone thinks a fetus is sacred. I don't, for one. I find it paradoxical that people who are perfectly willing to go to war at the drop of a hat and rejoice over the wholesale slaughter of young soldiers and civilians in foreign countries wring their hands at the plight of a fetus.
Passion for Peaches (<br/>)
Why would anyone want to "shout" their private health procedures? Despite the claim that this campaign is "not a celebration" of abortion, that is precisely what is happening here. If you truly believe that the right to an abortion is the right to unfettered health care, and that a fetus is no more than tissue, then this is equivalent to "shouting" your appendectomy. Would you bother? Probably not. That is because abortion is more than just tissue removal.

In a strange and convoluted way, this kind of "celebration" actually increases the stigma attached to abortion because it singles it out as something potentially shameful.
CC (Massachusetts)
No one is being threatened for having an appendectomy and no doctors who perform them have been murdered for doing so. People aren't forced to drive hours, sometimes multiple times, to secure a safe appendectomy. What a despicable equivalence. And how utterly dismissive of the lengths women and their health providers must go to, and the risks they must take, to manage their own bodies. The day you are refused an appendectomy because God put that appendix there, and it's your problem that you don't 'want' it anymore, is the day you can make this kind of ridiculous statement.
Edward Lindon (Taipei, Taiwan)
You're right, it's completely bizarre that we live in a world where it becomes necessary for women to advertise their healthcare history. In the same way, it was completely bizarre that millions of Americans lived double lives, cloaking their sexual identities in public, because of irrational and immoral prejudices against completely natural variations in human sexuality. But it was felt to be necessary because gay people were, with reason, afraid of being persecuted and attacked.

Now these women are publicly standing up for their rightful choices, not because they are obliged to or because they enjoy it, but because they know that the right to make such choices is under attack from religious ideologues.

Your comment boils down to this: victims should be ashamed of the measures they take to deal with or stand up to their abusers.
davecbt (Chicago, IL)
When congress seeks to de-fund providers of appendectomies, you might have a point. Stigmatization is one of the primary things keeping many women from seeking safe, responsible care, not only for pregnancies but for STD's. That, and ever-limiting the number of options open to them. If a shout helps mitigate those limits then shout on.
[email protected] (Midland Park, NJ)
I've always maintained that if everyone who ever had or caused someone to have an abortion would turn purple for a week, and they didn't know why until it was done, the debate to end abortion would surely abate. Imagine all the pro-life crusaders that would be publicly shamed for their hypocracy. Now that would be awesome.
Cindy-L (Woodside, CA)
A fetus is not a person. I have yet to see a full term baby that has a functioning central nervous system. A newborn baby definitely does not have a personality: it does not recognize people or objects. It shows no signs of having any thoughts. Since it is not a person it cannot be murdered.
ZL (Boston)
That seems a bit harsh. I think this is the kind of language that we do not need in this conversation.

The goal here is to allow women who have to make a difficult decision, probably the most difficult a woman can make, the time and perspective to do so without pressure. Describing the unborn child so callously is not helping this process.
MT (NYC area)
Cindy-L's comments are confusing. Are you saying that a newborn baby can be eliminated too because he/she doesn't have a personality and therefore is not a person? Also, the central nervous system has all of its neurons at birth and they are functioning, they just need to go through normal human development.
ultimateliberal (New Orleans)
Any blob of cells in which each contains 46 chromosomes is undoubtedly human, and is, therefore, developing into a viable, independent person. When those cells have multiplied enough to have developed essential organs for independent life, the human works itself out of the womb so that it can breathe and become separated from the mother, From the moment of conception, when a 46-chromosomed cell "came into being," the cell was undoubtedly human or it could not have multiplied into 5-8 lb mass of 46-chromosomed cells which is called a human.
Christine (OH)
1. If there is one thing that I am absolutely certain of in my life it is that I did not exist in my mother's womb. There was no little person there with hopes and dreams, plans, or love for God or Humankind.
2. Human persons are self-conscious beings who are created by already existing persons. They gave the infant brain the experiences necessary for the brain to develop. Mothers sacrifice to give us minds as well as bodies.
3. Women ARE persons; we are not things to be used by anyone or anything.
4. Women are perfectly capable of making intelligent, moral decisions about their own health.
5. Slavery is forbidden in the United States by the 13th amenment:
"Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction."
ultimateliberal (New Orleans)
1. If there is one thing that I am absolutely certain of in my life it is that I did not exist in my mother's womb. There was no little person there with hopes and dreams, plans, or love for God or Humankind.

Then where did you develop as a person? In a vat? At a brewery? In the lab of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde? Or was it a sheep in wolf's clothing that exited your mother's body? You would not exist if you had not lived for several months inside a woman's body.

What is the point you are trying to make, here?
Byrwec Ellison (Fort Worth)
It's not a woman's right to privacy that's at stake here; millions of women have chosen to exercise that right - in all likelihood, even women who profess to be against abortions but harbor their own secret. It's estimated that 55 million abortions have been performed since the Roe decision was handed down - two-thirds of them by women who already have children. It's their silence that has allowed the foes of abortion rights, women's choice, Planned Parenthood to gain the political traction they enjoy. It's their silence that has seen the whittling away of the Roe decision, the rise of Right-to-Life laws and the closure of hundreds of clinics around the country that serve women's needs. It's a brave thing to come out, and I can't hold it against any woman if she wants to keep her history private. But unless brave women speak up for themselves in large numbers, most Americans won't realize how close to home this issue hits them.
Favs (PA)
Unfortunately, this article simplistically frames those "shouting their abortion" as heroic in brave in coming forward, persecuted by hateful and angry people who represent the anti-abortion supporters. The truth is a lot more mixed. While many people may not regret their abortion, there are many people who do. There are also antagonistic abortion supporters who attack people who say they regret their abortions and say their regret is only because of shame and stigma that society puts on them, denying the truth that some people have inherent and natural regrets about losing something that was once part of them. There are also anti-abortion (pro-life) supporters who are not hateful and choose to have compassion on women facing difficult situations, even if they strongly disagree with abortion choice. I know these truths because I worked in a pregnancy center for over a decade and have friends who fall on all sides of the issue spectrum. The New York Times does no one any good by reporting in such lopsided terms. This is a difficult issue that's not going away, but no one needs to fan the flames of division through biased reporting.
Edward Lindon (Taipei, Taiwan)
The article is not simplistic; it is narrowly focused. Most readers are familiar enough with the terrain of this debate to do without a thorough description of its many facets in every single article on abortion. In other words, the focus of this article is not: "Here are some random thoughts some people have had on abortion", the generality of which would make the tight focus an over-simplification. The focus is: "Here are some specific actions undertaken by some specific people in response to some specific recent political movements on abortion".

And in any case, the fact that abusive morons abound on all sides of the debate does not mean that all sides are morally equivalent. The only strong blanket arguments against abortion are based in religion, and religion is no basis for public policy. Anti-abortionists are free not to have abortions themselves, but they are not free to stop others who do not share their convictions from having them. The anti-abortion position is fundamentally undemocratic and anti-secular.
ZL (Boston)
As with any complicated issue, the mixed bag of blurred lines you describe is almost certainly the actual truth, though the actual mixture may be different.
CC (Massachusetts)
I saw no statement in this article that no one ever regretted an abortion. Where do you see such a statement?
working mom (San Diego)
Nobody has a right to judge another person and calling somebody a baby killer isn't ever going to move the conversation forward. For a huge number of pro-life people, and certainly the Catholic Church, abortion and capital punishment are social justice issues. Abortion is more about unwanted fathers than it is about unwanted babies. We should have insisted that men evolve. The idea that boys will be boys is what should have died. Maybe then so many babies wouldn't have.
ZL (Boston)
Doesn't help here that the Catholic Church looks down on contraception...
MsQwerty (San Francisco)
So many of the pro-forced birth faction spout off about pregnancy as if it a minor inconvenience, like having to wear a coat for 9 months. Some women have uneventful pregnancies and deliveries, but many don't. At four months pregnant with twins I was diagnosed with an "insufficient cervix" which meant that I would dilate and deliver months early. After sewing my cervix closed did not resolve the issue, I was admitted to the hospital on complete bed rest for FOUR MONTHS! Fortunately, I had no other children at home who would have been deprived of their mother, and my husband earned enough that we were ok with only one income. Most women in the US would not have that luxury. Oh, and despite what Ben Carson, MD says, women still do die in childbirth in the United States from pre-eclampsia, blood clots, and uterine hemorrhage, etc.
ZL (Boston)
The responsibility of bearing a fetus to term isn't just the pregnancy. You then have a living person to take care of for the next couple of decades.
The Buddy (Astoria, NY)
The reproductive rights movement has done enough retreating, adopting the language of their oppressors by bending over backwards to describe getting an abortion as "tragic" or "painful". That's an accommodation strategy that has clearly accomplished nothing, while suffering a seemingly never ending series of setbacks. We're in desperate need of brave people who can tell their stories, and risk public shaming.

I dream of a strong reproductive rights lobby that's as aggressive and inflexible as the NRA. God willing, perhaps this can be the spark.
ZL (Boston)
I fully support a woman's right to choose, but frankly, the termination of a pregnancy is a tragedy as much as it is to have a miscarriage or a stillborn child. How can it be anything but?

Your dream is never going to happen because the number of abortions in this country is low, though higher than many would like. It's hard for those people who don't know anyone who's struggled with the choice of an abortion to understand the perspective of women who have to make that choice. That lack of perspective isn't going away any time soon.

That's how the gay movement made so much headway. People everywhere knew a gay person and found that that gay person was a really decent human being.
Amy D. (Los Angeles)
If congress were not made up of a bunch of hypocrites, they would know that in order to avoid abortions, they need to make birth control cheap and readily available. Were it not for Planned Parenthood back in the 70s who knows how many of us college girls would have become pregnant. Several I knew who did not go to PP, did become pregnant and had quiet abortions. Shout about keeping it legal and safe, but to "shout your abortion" is to take a difficult private decision and make it an "in your face" event. That's just as bad as the protesters outside the clinics.
ZL (Boston)
It wouldn't hurt to make child care universal and reduce poverty. Raising a child is a wonderful thing, but if you are struggling, it is a real burden, especially if you already are struggling to raise the kids you already have.
Tim C (San Diego, CA)
I doubt there will ever be a consensus on abortion in this country, but I wonder if we can maybe get to an environment that encourages availability of contraception, and provides better support for poor women choosing to have a baby. This means better contraceptive education, more accessible pre-natal medical care, better post-natal care and support, improved child care options and jobs. These measures would reduce the number of abortions, while preserving a woman's right to choose.

I don't see how those in Congress who think that defunding Planned Parenthood will help the situation, and I don't see how an in-your-face Twitter campaign adds to a reasonable dialogue.
AACNY (NY)
Planned Parenthood is a major provider of reproductive services, which includes pregnancy prevention. How effective are its efforts? Yes, many fondly remember using its services at some point, and it's easy to formulate a number for pregnancy"preventions", but is it really using tax dollars effectively to prevent pregnancies? There's a scintilla of doubt when it also generates significant revenue from women who didn't use their birth control effectively.
gb (New York)
Yes, it is really, really, really, really...efficient use of tax dollars to prevent unwanted pregnancies. Can anyone think of anything that comes close to that degree of efficiency? And...if there's anything at all on this earth that there is already quite a sufficiency of...it is...us.
So, wake up! And stay out of other people's private decisions.
Dr.Dr (Texas)
Planned Parenthood prevents an estimated 400,000 abortions a year. Not to mention the monstrous number of unplanned pregnancies that would be been carried to term. So yeah, that's a pretty solid use of Medicaid I think.
Richard (<br/>)
I find it deeply troubling that the courageous woman of "Shout Your Abortion" are being threatened.

As a male who has had the honor to be associated with women who have made the choice to have an abortion at times in their lives and gone on to significant life accomplishments including for some raising a wanted child. I want to declare that I stand with and support these women for their courage and their choices.

I decry their tormentors. To those who would deprive women of the right to choose I and other right minded men say "You shall not pass, you shall not prevail". We stand with our sisters in this fight.
Expat (NY)
My friend had four pregnancies.

She chose to abort the first one, as she was not in a stage in her life where she was ready to care for a child. Nor was she with the right man. It was not an easy choice, but it was the right choice for her. I was happy I could be there for her to hold her hand at the hospital.

For the second pregnancy her boyfriend at the time tried to persuade her to abort. She dumped the boyfriend, and kept the baby.

The third pregnancy was by choice through a fertility clinic.

The fourth pregnancy was much wanted, but the fetus had severe chromosome errors, and was expected to have a short and low quality life, if carried to term. She chose to abort.

I am so glad, that I live in a society where my friend had the full right to make decisions over her body. The current development, trying to regulate abortion clinics out of existence by bogus admittance criteria, imposing waiting periods that force women to take extra time off from work (and other children?), and defunding Planned Parenthood are so scary to me.
hen3ry (New York)
I was a child that my parents weren't ready to have. If abortion had been legal my parents would have had better lives. They might have divorced, found other spouses, and I wouldn't be around feeling the way I do or the way I did. Make no mistake, not being wanted hurts and it continues to hurt throughout your life. Knowing that my parents didn't want me affected and affects every part of my life. To those who say that it would be unfortunate if I hadn't been born or how would I feel, I say this: that's a red herring excuse. Why? I wouldn't know the difference, nor would anyone else. I also wouldn't know how it feels to want to be loved or cared about, or to believe that anyone who loves me or cares about me is overlooking something that must be wrong with me because my parents didn't want me. Yes, I would have been better off not being born. Smoke on your pipes and think about how WE, the children who were not wanted, feel as children and adults. Think about how our parents feel. Think about the that results when a child is unwanted. If you still believe that abortion is a crime start donating money to provide every unwanted child with a safe, healthy, happy life.
Passion for Peaches (<br/>)
I'm sorry for your troubles. It's common for kids to grow up convinced they weren't wanted. I was the last kid in a big family and my mother was pretty much over the whole mom thing by the time I showed up, so I was sure I was unwanted (my siblings told me I was adopted!). But my mother's deep unhappiness was her own problem. She was abusive and generally a damaging person, but I grew up and left home and never looked back. Would my mother have aborted me if she was of my generation? Of course not. But then I don't think she would have had kids at all if she could have had access to dependable contraception. Babies sometimes just happen, even these days, and couples still get roped into marriages they would have done well to avoid. I think the thing your parents lacked was good contraception. And maybe the means and freedom to divorce.
Bobcat108 (Upstate NY)
I completely agree w/h3nry. Ten years prior to Roe v. Wade, my parents married in a hushed shotgun wedding because my mom was nearly three months pregnant w/me. While I was growing up I always knew something wasn't right in my household & I always felt that there was something wrong w/me—nothing I did was ever good enough, & any small misstep was treated as though it was the end of the world. It wasn't until I was nearly 20 that I learned the truth. Although I logically knew at that point that I wasn't the one to blame for the unhappy atmosphere in the home, emotionally it took far many more years before I could really believe that I wasn't at fault, & even now the repercussions still echo through my family's dynamics.
mc (New York, N.Y.)
Val in Brooklyn, NY. to Hen3ry in NY.

This is my first time commenting before finishing an article. But, you commanded my attention with your pained eloquence. Yours is a voice I've rarely heard regarding abortion--that of the unwanted child.

I can't say I'm sorry you exist, because you are here and must be recognized as the decent, intelligent person you are. But how do I say that without sounding as though I'm invalidating, disrespecting, and not acknowledging your pain? And, I speak as a woman who is firmly pro-choice. I donated to Planned Parenthood today, as others have before me.

I'm glad that you spoke. The zealots really need to hear YOUR voice. They need to hear YOUR very important perspective, which is free of sophistry and speaks a HARD truth that everyone needs to hear.

One final word, not to place a burden on you (odd as it may sound), but, I do hope that you've been able to find some joy, happiness in your life and people who love and value you. You certainly deserve it.

Submitted 10-1-15, 8:38 p.m. EST
x (y)
I am an adoptive mother of two. I am extremely grateful that my children's birth mothers chose to carry them to term. I am glad too that it was a "choice". The idea that the government should force them to go through with a pregnancy, so I could adopt, is preposterous.
Carl Ian Schwartz (<br/>)
Only when you de-fund the options, ranging from birth control to abortion, and use faith-based rather than fact-based sex education, is there NO CHOICE. "Right to life" is just a euphemism for an inability for a woman to make a responsible choice, even if that choice is to avoid pregnancy altogether. Abstinence-only is a fairy tale that doesn't work. Rhythm is better in music than in contraception.
You, and your adopted kids, are lucky you were able to adopt--and, hopefully, at an early age. Neuroscientific research teaches that institutionalized kids born to mothers who give them up for adoption face laggard brain and intelligence development if left institutionalized past two years.
But the GOP TP (Tea Party, not toilet paper) ignores the facts, and forces Americans to do the same.
angrygirl (Midwest)
I am also the mother of two adopted children and I completely agree with you. No one has the right to tell a woman what to do with her body, whether it's choosing to have a child biologically or not. If you believe abortion is a sin, don't have one. But don't you dare tell another woman what she can and cannot do with HER body.
NSH (Chester)
As an adopted child I am with you. The idea that my life would be predicated on forcing my biological mother to carry me is so horrifying I can not even name the feeling. (Or I can but the words would trigger too much hate responses).

Too often we hear from women wishing to adopt that women who are pregnant somehow how them the children in their womb. It makes me shudder. I appreciate that you do not.
Susan Brooks (Ohio)
I understand the need for abortion and support its legality but still there are areas that give me pause. Also, while I don't find abortion to be shameful, the idea of turning it into a tweetathon is troubling.

As w all issues, it saddens me that those on opposite sides vilify one another en masse. There are people - I have known some personally - who are against abortion but don't stand outside clinics and intimidate women and medical personnel. There are also people who are against abortion who are for social services after a child is born. Stereotypes are wrong, no matter who is being stereotyped.
SadDoctor (Princeton, NJ)
Thank you for this thoughtful comment. The worst thing about the US abortion debate is the vilification&stereotyping of the other side that continuously occurs, which pretty much shuts down any rational debate. I'm a medical doctor who believes that life starts at conception and is properly established at implantation, yet I have no ethical problem in choosing the mother's life over that of an unborn baby when the mother's life is at risk,as may be the situation in severe pre-eclampsia. I am also hugely sympathetic to the awful situations in which many pregnant women find themselves, and understand why many would choose to end their pregnancies. Yet, I have no doubt that a life is being ended, and #ShoutYourAbortion therefore is to me a disturbing and sad trend, in which personal autonomy and choice trumps the life of an unborn child. I found some of the twitter responses around #ShoutYourAdoption extremely moving, as many people thanked their biological mothers for putting them up for adoption rather than aborting them.

Now, just because I believe that life starts at conception, it doesn't mean that I am a woman-hating, misogynistic, judgemental Christian Republican who believes in fighting for unborn babies but not for born children. Though this may be true in rare cases, the vast majority of people who are uncomfortable about abortion do not fit anywhere close to this stereotype, and want good contraception services and proper care for mothers& children after birth!
NSH (Chester)
But the issue is that the biggest stereotype is who has an abortion. It is always portrayed as a "selfish, irresponsible woman" somebody outside of normal society. But one in three women have had one. I don't think you'll get one in three women to be public about it, (this is not a positive experience for anyone)but it would change the conversation if it were known, and perhaps defang them. So I get the point.
SLD (San Francisco)
If it makes women who have experienced abortions feel better about their decisions, then shouting about it may prove not only healing, but give us an idea of the large number of regular women go through them. Back in the olden days, I marched for womens' right to choose and still have to now, many years later, when I thought the abortion issued had been resolved. For the Pro-Life people (a huge misnomer) if they cannot extend their compassion for fetuses to real women who were raped or are ill or feel that having a child is wrong for them, then just what about life are they supporting ? And why do the same people who want every life to be sacred, refuse to see the value in and try to eliminate social services that support children once they're born? You can't force someone who doesn't want a child(for whatever reason) to give birth and then abandon them to raise their children on their own. As we used to say long ago, "Keep Your Laws Off My Body!
Maureen (New York)
Last Sunday at my parish church there was a collection for "unborn babies" -- There did not appear to be much concern for the already born mom. If all these truly sincere people showed the moms and women in general a fraction of the concern and care they have for "unborn babies", perhaps there would be fewer abortions overall.
kathryn (boston)
birth control provided by planned parenthood avoided 38,000 abortions last year. If your parish wanted to do something about abortions, they could advocate for free birth control and education.
dobes (<br/>)
I would have walked out of that church for the precise reason you stated. Anyway - how are unborn babies supposed to use that money?
Kate (New York)
Doctors identify "herd immunity" when talking about the benefits the vaccinated provide for the unvaccinated in this country. As someone who was raised Catholic, I think the same applies for abortion and all reproductive rights. I myself have felt the pressure not to speak out. I have extremely right-wing in-laws who have had their tubes tied, hysterectomy, and even abortion, yet they insist on limiting the rights of other women. I think that is the next frontier, maybe outing women and their partners. It will be ugly but it might lead to more honest discourse.
MN (Michigan)
I never thought of that, it has the grain of a very interesting idea....
MJS (Atlanta)
I am 54yr old Catholic originally from the NE, but have lived in Atlanta since college the early 1980's. Those friends I met are now late 50's to the friends I have met as a parent, in their 40's. I will clearly tell you that over 50% of the women maybe 75% of the women I know have had an Abortion.

How do I know, I am the friend who drove them to the abortion clinic in midtown. I had an abortion, when I got pregnant after my first marriage was over. Sure lots of woman lie. They had miscarriages, D & C's ( that by the way is an abortion).

I answered the call when my friend told me that Delta's application for flight attendants asked have you ever had an abortion. i replied did you put it on you Eastern insurance? No, then the answer is No!

Now my 21 year old takes friends to that same clinic or buys the morning after pill they are too embarrassed to buy,

Many of these hypocritical men are the same ones who paid for abortions!

i vote ProChoice in the General elections. Primaries I vote to eliminate competition.
Laura (Florida)
"D & C's ( that by the way is an abortion). "

Let's cut out some misinformation here. D & Cs are performed for many reasons, including excessive bleeding during menstruation due to fibroids. If the woman having one is not pregnant, it is not an abortion. Please do not assume that any woman who has a D & C is having an abortion.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/dilation-and-curettage/basics...
Passion for Peaches (<br/>)
A D&C is not "an abortion."
Margarita (Texas)
I'm glad women are talking about this openly. Part of the problem, I think, has been that lots of women have abortions, but because no one says anything for fear of reprisal or reproach, we all think we are the only ones. I'm glad I had the choice to have an abortion when I was in graduate school, and I'm glad that it was a safe, easily obtainable procedure. Death threats are terrorism; an attempt to use the threat of violence to deter people's actions. Women shouldn't have to endure death threats to obtain safe, legal health care. This isn't a theocracy or a third world country.
sweinst254 (nyc)
Were these women actually expecting they wouldn't receive some very nasty responses and even death threats?

That said, I always find it interesting how people who live "virtual" lives take seriously virtual threats. If they're getting so many threatening messages, why not just log off of their social media networks for a while?

Out of sight, out of mind.
Sarah (<br/>)
Did you miss the part where one of their addresses (her real address, not virtual address) was posted?
Logging off is not going to solve that. She could be in danger because of this malicious action. That is danger in the real, not virtual, world.
Expat (NY)
i suspect they are not surprised, but that doesn't make death threats acceptable.

How do you know, anyhow, that just because death threats are made anonymously and on the internet that they aren't real?
Paul (Phoenix, AZ)
The pro abortion crowd says a woman has a right to chose. The anti abortion crowd responds that abortion is murder.

Until either side can make its case consistently by refuting the other side's argument, that the other side is wrong, then the apples/oranges screaming will continue.
AC (Minneapolis)
No one is "pro-abortion."

Pro-choice people don't expect anti-choice people to have an abortion or even agree with all the reasons abortion must be kept legal. Anti-choice people demand total capitulation.

It's not a matter of consistently arguing a point. The pro-choice side refutes the anti-choice side's arguments every day and every time. The latter group just doesn't hear them and refuses to accept them.
DRG (NH)
I grew up in a pro-choice household and always wondered if pregnancy would change my view on abortion. A few months ago my husband and I were thrilled to discover I was (finally) pregnant. But as I experience pregnancy I think over and over again: no one should be forced to do this unless they want to. Pregnancy is hard and a complicated pregnancy is 9 months of hell. Childbirth is excruciatingly painful and carries serious medical risks. It horrifies me to think of some 15 year old kid going through this unwillingly. It is not okay to say "well, she had sex, these are the consequences." In my opinion, a compelled pregnancy and childbirth is a form of torture.
pixilated (New York, NY)
This country has always had its share of intrusive, holier than thou, moral scolds, but it's really been the modern era where it's been possible to make it a career choice outside of churches run by fire and brimstone members of the clergy. Today, thanks to the collapse not of civilization, but civility, and a thoroughly corrupted electoral system, it is possible to make a very nice living in the judgment and harassment business as a paid member of a lobbying concern, crank media figure, politician or just an average person taking his or her religious extremism public in the hope of cashing in on a short period in the public eye. That their behavior is so obnoxious and repellent that it does next to nothing to further their cause does not appear to dissuade them; nor does it seem to occur them that even the abridged Bible they use to prop up that behavior includes admonitions against repeatedly giving false witness, engendering hate and sometimes violence or not giving an iota of thought to the harm they are causing with their misguided assaults on those already born and just as deserving respect as a zygote. Somehow I don't think that creating doctored videos, demonizing people for their own decisions, peeping into other people's lives, pretending to be a messenger based on hubris and spreading malicious lies is not going to earn you points in the hereafter.
Pam (Grosse Pointe, Michigan)
RE: “I think the right to life should always trump the right to live as you choose.” Each woman should have her own right to life as well. No one but the woman herself knows whether she is able and willing to be a mother. Motherhood should not be thrust upon anyone. Post-partum depression is alive and not-well. There are many women who are not able psychologically to carry, deliver or care for a child. They should not be forced to. No one - doctors, women who would love to have a child, men, husbands, fathers, politicians, the devoutly religious or anyone else - is living in the same world as the woman who faces the decision to continue or end a pregnancy. Adoption is not necessarily the answer to abortion because carrying a child to term and giving it up is traumatic. Adoption is not the answer for fetuses with known abnormalities and disorders which no child ultimately survives, or which prevent parents from living full lives. Live with such a family for a week - or even a day - and see how well they manage. Imagine doing that for decades. Then imagine parenting that child for a lifetime. Abortion is not the macabre event the abortion foes would have us believe. Ending an unwanted pregnancy is life-saving for the parents. Abortion gives "the right to life" to people who are already here.
CK (Rye)
Calling women murderers, for having had a perfectly moral, ethical, and legal termination of a pregnancy, is misogynist psychological terrorism. Legislative moves to constrain a woman's freedom to control her own body under Roe v Wade by putting barriers in the way are misogynist tyranny.

Men and women who practice either need to be confronted at every opportunity and dressed down by those of us who love and respect women.

There is nothing immoral about a pre viability abortion. I encourage women to celebrate their best decisions concerning whether to raise a family or continue a pregnancy. Take yourselves out, have lunch, and buy something nice. You deserve it.
SCA (NH)
Sorry. Abortion should indeed be safe, legal, and rare--because everyone should be thoroughly educated on the biology of human reproduction and how to prevent conception; everyone should be able to access low-cost contraception that is suitable for their body and their lifestyle.

But just as no one should be shamed, or feel shame, for aborting a pregnancy, there is nothing to celebrate here. Surely there may be rightful relief, and there are many reasons why adoption may not be the appropriate choice for any particular woman. No one should be coerced into becoming a gestator to fulfill someone else's needs.

The mindset here is one reason why pro-choice organizations have failed so profoundly in truthfully advocating for a necessary right. After the embryonic stage, a tiny human's life is being ended. To the point of viability, the woman carrying it must always have the right to make that choice, safely and legally. But do not diminish the reality of what abortion is.
koko (ny, ny)
I don't tweet. Two abortions, late 70s, no regrets then or now, only relief. Since then I've given birth to and raised one very much chosen child and made a career teaching parenting skills and counseling traumatized children and their parents. I've worked with many women who had multiple abortions, and many women who had child after child after child in families where those children were neglected, beaten, starved, sexually abused. The girls often had babies of their own upon reaching puberty. I worked with a couple of those daughters who had their first child at 11.

I'm certain that women and girls who know they aren't ready to be, or capable of being emotionally mature, parents make the better choice when they choose abortion.
Ricky (Saint Paul, MN)
It's only too paradoxical that someone would have to fear death threats from self-styled "life is sacred" anti-abortion wacko birds, but that's what passes for sanity in this country. Oh wait - there was just another school shooting - where were all the gun activists lined up with their pistols at the ready to take on the shooter? Yeah, you're right, it really doesn't work that way.

The truth is, these "causes" are really collection points for demented and sick people who need some kind of "higher" cause to go on living. These are the same people who would be against frosting on cake if sugar beets had to die to make the ingredients. We ignore the homeless lying in the streets, people dying by the thousands from disease and starvation around the world, the mentally ill in our own midst, etc. etc. But the demented go crazy for the "unborn." They're so precious, so tender, little babies, little angels.

For those who abhor abortion, do something productive. Go down to the homeless shelter and take a family home, feed and shelter them. Do something real. Carrying signs around and chanting slogans - this is meaningless. Murdering clinic workers - this shows your true colors. Get your hands dirty doing something real for society. Walk down to a ghetto school and tutor some kid who needs it. Put shoes on kids' feet, and food in their stomachs. Stop pretending you're holy by knocking people down on sidewalks.
Fr. Bill (Maui)
As a gay man growing up in the 50's and 60's I can somewhat appreciate the position of women who have had an abortion being asked to "come out". No one back then would have called me "gay" if they found out. It would have a whole bunch of names "queer" being the mildest. To the religious I was a blatant sinner and a sodomist.

I know the shame. I bore it until I realized it wasn't mine - I was just carrying their righteousness around my neck. When a critical mass of gay folk threw off the shame the world changed. Ignorance, fear, bigotry and religious mania replaced my shame. Thank God. And I was free and they are mad as hell.
Cybele Plantagenet (flying low)
The right to an abortion is in the 1st Amendment of the Constitution: Freedom of Religion. I was fortunate to never need one, but it certainly wasn't against my religion. It wasn't a sin, because I don't believe in sin.

I'm sure the day will come when babies are ordered like pizzas and grown in labs, but until then your religion has no place in my uterus. Why not take some advice from Jesus and feed the poor instead.
zula (new york)
What is a "sin" is to bring an unwanted child into an environment where that child will be unloved, possibly abused, neglected, hungry,possibly drug or alcohol addicted, and unable to thrive. I don't see pro-lifers stepping in feed, clothe, house , provide medical care or educate unwanted children, just cutting social programs that might.
Michele Topol (Henderson, NV)
Women today don't appreciate the importance of keeping abortion legal and having access to birth control. Sometimes I think they should reverse Roe. Let women today actually live in the pre Roe, pre pill world and see how they like it. They would find out what it means to live in a third world country.
martin in dallas (dallas, tx)
Just last month in book group the ( late middle aged) women were recalling various experiences with abortion pre- Roe v. Wade. One recalled a sorority sister, a freshman, who became pregnant, could not go to her parents for help. An abortion was arranged, in Mexico. Her boyfriend, the father, left her on the street as she was taken by someone, somewhere, alone for the procedure. I do not think this was an uncommon experience. I think the idea of ' shout your abortion' is important. It is important to understand how many and in what ways this is a fear that you or your daughter might have to make that choice, a sadness for having made the choice, or a relief that you never had to make that choice. Planned Parenthood is available for women and girls that may not have anywhere else to go anonymously. Even if it is legal anonymous can be important.
maryellen simcoe (baltimore md)
Well Micheal, I remember pre-Roe. I remember driving a friend from PA to Westchester County NY in a blizzard, because at the time, abortion was legal in NY. But, lots of women would suffer again. That's a large price to pay to get people's attention. I just sent a large donation to PP, not enough.
Ms C (Union City, NJ)
Anti-choicers are domestic terrorists, and should be treated as such by law enforcement and the American people. They commit hate crimes against women, medical professionals, anyone who gets in the way of their misogynist agenda. They are our Taliban, our disgrace.
Joe (Iowa)
I feel the same way about the anti-lifers in this country,
Connie (Los Angeles)
If God were a female, this discussion would be DOA. As it is, I feel like we are heading for the middle ages of misinformation and witch hunts. Goddess help us all--men and not-men.
Karen (New Jersey)
I just want to point out the lack of critical, logical thinking in your post, without addressing the abortion debate. Many women oppose abortion, many men support it. Liberal men likely support it, conservative women surely don't. Yours is a sort of knee jerk anti-men feminism that is unfair to many male supporters. I think nyt-reading liberal men have been supporting feminism in a heartfelt way for decades, and this goddess anti men stuff not what they deserve; rather they dsserve some appreciation.
Deborah Moran (Houston)
Some people here wonder about whether they would exist if their parents had aborted them. But they do not worry about the potential sibling who never came about later on because they were born first. It simply is meaningless to worry about the myriad of people who were never born. We have enough to worry about for the people who are here.
Been There, Caught That (NC mountains)
For all those who favor abortion, it's a lucky thing your mother didn't choose to abort you because you were inconvenient or times were hard or she just didn't want to put up with a squalling baby that year.

Of course, there may be health and societal (rape, incest) reasons that justify abortion in a small minority of cases, but killing a viable fetus, much less butchering it for parts to sell as Planned Parenthood has been shown to do, is surely a crime against humanity.

As an alternative, how about taking some responsibility and working out an adoption? There are lots of organizations willing to help with that.
zula (new york)
If I had been aborted, I wouldn't know or feel bad about it, would I? And if terminating pregnancy allowed my fetal tissue were used for disease research or for burn victims, I think it would be something quite life-affirming.
ohg (NY)
Your position is utterly absurd. A being not brought into sentient existence has no opinion or feeling regarding existence versus nonexistence.

I have been menstruating 13 times a year since 1974, except for about two years of pregnancy and recovery. That means that I have produced about 300 eggs, each carrying half of the DNA of a human being, that ended up being discharged from my body and discarded. Should I be mourning for these potential lives not brought to fruition?

If you believe that abortion is a crime against humanity, then by all means do not have one.
Cybele Plantagenet (flying low)
Nobody favors abortion. It's not an ice cream flavor.
GLB (NYC)
A family was holding a sign I've seen before, offereing help to those poor unhappy souls who've had abortions. I want to scream back that those who have had abortions are not unhappy, but relieved that they have been able to live good lives with the children they have chosen to have. I'd stop, but they have no interest in beleiving this truth.
vibise (Maryland)
The anti-abortion crowd has long insisted that abortion results in psychological damage including depression and suicidal thoughts. However, this is a lie, as many surveys of women who have had abortions indicate that ~90% report their main reaction was relief, and 80-90% have no regrets.

These women are being pressured by the anti-abortionists to stay in the shadows, and to feel guilt and shame. It is time that we heard their voices and their experiences and their responses. Let's get the facts out.
Margo (Boston, MA)
I was 18 when the condom broke and I had an abortion. I have never regretted it to this day and I am 59yo.
Carla (Cleveland, OH)
Actually, there's a new study:
Decision Rightness and Emotional Responses to Abortion in the United States: A Longitudinal Study

Turns out 99 percent of American women who have had abortions say they made the right decision.

http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0128832
AZYankee (Scottsdale, AZ)
In fact, the late Surgeon General C. Everett Koop, who opposed abortion, commissioned a study to "prove" abortion caused psychological damage. Guess what? He found no reliable reports to show for it.http://www.nytimes.com/1989/03/17/us/koop-says-abortion-report-couldn-t-...
JSD (New York, NY)
While this movement is quite affirming for those already entrenched on a pro-choice viewpoint (which BTW, I am), the Republicans could not think of a better way to scare the moderates and squishy pro-choicers than to have us do this.

One thing I try to emphasize with my children is the difference between being "right" and being "smart". Of course, we can all argue that in the abstract constitutional sense, it is "right" (both morally and factually) that a woman should not feel ashamed for personal reproductive choices. BUT.... how "smart" is it to have the pro-choice side eagerly taunting others in a "in-your-face" manner about the exercise of the choices, while dismissing legitimate concerns of the other side.

Is that going to win friends and advocates? Is it going to elicit sympathy for our position or for women's rights? Will it motivate repressive regimes to ease up on their restrictions or inspire pro-lifers to knock off their legal and regulatory attacks?

Or will it harden positions and hearts? Will it inspire opponents to double their efforts to restrict abortions however and wherever they can?

Like it or not, our constitutional democracy depends on the minority ceding to the will of the majority and the majority to ceding to the rule of law (including interpretations of constitutional rights). Does glibly provoking this already enraged faction really help our society?
VegasBusinessWoman (Fabulous Las Vegas)
I consider myself incredibly lucky to have never had to make that terrible, painful, difficult choice to have an abortion. My heart goes out to any woman who has felt that has been her only choice. I can hardly imagine a more private issue for any woman to have had in her life. That being so, it seems callous and cavalier of the gravity of that personal pain to ask anyone who has been there to shout about it. Seriously, what did these women expect?
Portland (Oregon)
They expected those who wanted to shout to shout. Many of us who have had abortions felt no "gravity of personal pain" but, rather, just relief. Why would anyone expect death threats?
dcl (New Jersey)
There are two issues here that grieve me deeply.

The first is obvious. Abortions are legal. Freedom of speech is our right. It is our right as Americans to be able to speak about something that happened to us, particularly something legal.

The second is more insidious. As social media has grown in popularity, & the media has abandoned being the fifth estate, with rare exceptions, their mission degenerated into generating revenue for their owners, & if that means by click bait, false controversy, etc, fine-- as these trends have taken off, there has been a sharp fall in debate, critical thinking, reasoned debate with supports, civilized discussion.

Instead, on *both* sides, if you disagree with the party line, you are excommunicated. You have blasphemed. You are not In The Right Club.There is no gray. You are either in my Twitter feed & 'liking' my comments, or you are the enemy. You are obedient to the credo, or you have sinned.

Here, the Right wing anti-abortionists heap death threats against those who fail to conform to their dogma. Blaspheme, & you are evil or anti-American, period.

But the Left is every bit as extreme. Disagree, & you are racist, stupid or crazy. Literally, that is the only 3 insults you need, no debate required. Look at the headlines here in this paper. Count how many times Republicans are called racist, stupid or crazy.

Both sides have abandoned civil, reasoned discourse. It is shameful that we Americans have fallen so low.
Jeff (Fresno, CA)
I agree dcl. Our society has unfortunately driven itself to a place where rational, respectful dialogue is rare. One serious concern I had after the Supreme Court ruling regarding gay marriage was that faithful Christians like myself seem to be experiencing more and more disrespect from those who disagree with our views. It feels like we are not even welcome at the table of public debate sometimes if the comments here are any indication. When entire groups are people are put in a box and disrespected/ridiculed/dismissed no one benefits. I always appreciate thoughtful comments here. Thanks again for recognizing a real problem that needs to be addressed in our country.
LPC (CT)
The difference is, disagreement with leftists doesn't generally get you shot and killed.
A (Midwest)
When I had an unplanned pregnancy at 22, I married the father and had my son. We had another son 17 months after the first and four years later, when the marriage had become abusive, I left with both of them. I love my sons and would not change any of my decisions. But I also realize there are a lot of women who do NOT have the support/education/finances/temperment to handle that kind of situation. Honestly, if I had become pregnant in the months leading up to escaping that marriage, I don't know what I would have done. I trust women to make the right choice for themselves and I feel nothing but compassion and empathy for those choices. And a clump of cells is not a human being - otherwise every woman who has ever experienced a miscarriage would be a murderer.
Stephen Rinsler (Arden, NC)
The Congressman for my district broadcast an e-mail emphasizing his efforts against abortion. I sent a response saying we differed and that my view was that womens rights over their bodies was constitutionally protected.

He responded directly to me, emphasizing his efforts as a pro-life individual and mentioning the video circulated recently by an anti-abortion group.
He mentioned his belief that human life begins at conception.

I responded for a second time, noting that before conception two living cells existed which then merged into a single cell. This single cell is not a human.

I also mentioned that a truly pro-life individual would support legislation against capital punishment, and legislation supporting families in raising their children.

Steve Rinsler, MD
zula (new york)
And a truly pro-life individual might reconsider those sanctified "tiny feet" into combat boots when they have grown.
Diane (Los Angeles)
How dare anyone, especially any man, pass judgement on my abortions. Try being able to get pregnant for 45 years of your life. No contraception prevents pregnancy 100% of the time. Even the morning after pill is only 75 % effective.

When every last boy and man stops having unprotected sex, when men take actual responsibility for any and all unplanned pregnancies and children, when men bear the entire burden of pregnancies, labor and child-rearing, THEN I will listen to your opinion on abortion.
zula (new york)
Dear Diane- You seem to feel that you DO need to justify abortion! You do NOT.
Tony (Vienna, VA)
Some men are terrified of women who want to control their own lives. There aren't enough people on the planet? Unfortunately these people who trumpet their concern for the unborn seem to care absolutely nothing about the living. They do not care for those people who are the victims of the cruise missiles launched into foreign neighborhoods. They do not care for those people executed in our name who without a doubt in some instances were innocent. They do not care for those victims of mass shootings where the pathetic "second amendment" rights to kill efficiently are more important than the rights not to die by a gun. They choose the science they want to believe with their "faith based" realities and choose to ignore what is happening in the real world. I believe in democracy and we unfortunately have to put up with the members of these fantastical belief systems as they thrash about denying the realities of demography. Their days are numbered but they will cause us all much suffering as they fade away.
w (md)
It makes one wonder about the up-bring of these extremists who hate and fear woman power; the very ability to bring forth life.
What is their relationship with their mothers' and their wives'?

The very power of life within the female body is so overwhelming to them they only know they must attack and kill the "beast" they fear so much.

After a while victimization becomes a choice.
We must all rise up over this mind-set once and for all.
Not matter what the cause.
Stand proudly by your choice.

Claim your power.
Now!
A Wilson (San Francisco)
Information for Clueless Male Commenters:

--Birth control methods have associated failure rates. A woman can be
using a birth control method completely correctly and the method can
still fail, with a resulting pregnancy.

--Not all women can use all birth control methods. Limiting factors
include the woman's own health history, her finances, and her
access to appropriate counselors, doctors & pharmacists.

--Late-term abortions are generally the result of receiving tragic news
about the health of the fetus. I recommend tracking down and
watching the film "After Tiller", in which the filmmakers interviewed
women who decided to have late abortions under these circumstances.
I remember particularly a young woman who was crying as she
described the horrific diagnosis her fetus had received. She said, "I
love my baby - I can't do that to her."

--Unless you are a heterosexual/bisexual man who has lived an
exceptionally restricted life, you have no way of knowing whether a
woman you had sex with later had an abortion.

--Abortion providers have reported that "right-to-life" women also
have abortions.

--In the old days, people often assumed that they didn't know any
gay people, because the gay people that they did know hadn't
come out to them. Now, I am often struck by how many people
assume they don't know anyone who was sexually assaulted as
a child - and by how many men assume that they don't know any
women who have had abortions.
aubrey (nyc)
right to choose includes right to be private. no shouting necessary. women can choose but many will also need to process the complex emotions that accompany that choice as a personal and private experience, not part of a crusade.
Suzabella (Santa Ynez, CA)
It's about time women aren't stigmatized for having an abortion. We've seen tremendous strides with civil rights for blacks and LGBT"S. But often women who have had an abortion are still not respected by some. Abortion is a deeply personal decision that should be made between a woman and her doctor. And thankfully there are still doctors who can do this procedure.

Don't anti-abortion people realize that you cannot stop a woman who wants an abortion from having one? This is a fantasy. Women have been aborting babies since the beginning of time. Until recently it has been a dangerous procedure sometimes resulting in illness or death. Making abortion legal has just made it a safe medical procedure. Those who want to stop abortion want to turn back the clock to a time when women had to go in secret to doctors or use a coat hanger. I remember those days and had friends who "went on a little vacation". I have stayed in contact with one of them and she has since had several children and wonderful grandchildren.

I applaud those who #ShoutYourAbortion and support their coming out of the closet.

To ALL those who oppose abortion I suggest they publicly advertise their willingness to take in an unwanted baby and raise it as their own. That includes all politicians who would try to make abortion illegal.
zula (new york)
What you are acknowledging here is what "pro-lifers"- particularly men- believe in their hears that women exist for their convenience, are "lesser", and do not deserve respect or autonomy. Yesterday's ridiculous, accusatory, insulting inquisition of Cecile Richards put quite the spotlight on that. Until institutionalized sexism is eliminated-I'm talking to you, Pope Francis, although I admire some of your ideas- and all you Dominionist pastors and religious fundamentalists- women cannot achieve gender parity.
Amelia Jensen (New York, NY)
While the exact figures may be in dispute, what is irrefutable is that A LOT of American women, across just about every demographic, have had abortions for varying reasons: unwanted pregnancy; genetic fetal/maternal abnormalities; due to rape or incest; or in cases of medical emergencies, etc.

It isn't just about dealing with an inconvenient pregnancy. The fact that so many women have terminated their pregnancies - many because they needed to have that abortion in order to save their lives - speaks volumes about the continued need for safe and legal access to this procedure.

I can certainly understand why a woman would not want to publicly admit that she has had an abortion. I can also understand why people want to avoid this debate entirely: it is ugly, it is polarizing, and regardless of which side you're on, you can't win.

But what I can't understand is why so many of the women who have had abortions - and by extension, the men who were also deeply affected by that - seem to feel no obligation to do anything to ensure that other women, other families, will be able to have access to this procedure just as they once did.

Whether you choose to be silent or not on this issue, the fact is that abortion rights can only be eroded if people choose to elect politicians into office who are against the right of choice.

Did you have an abortion? Do you think the choice you made should also be available to others? If so, you don't need to say anything. But you do need to vote.
Howard G (New York)
A Call to "Shout Your Abortion" -

While I agree that every woman should have the absolute right to have control over her own body - including the right to choose whether or not to have an abortion -- I'm also thinking about another right which all women should have...

The right to privacy regarding the choices they make about their bodies --

I'm thinking about the thousands of women who - for whatever reason - prefer not to "Shout Your Abortion" ...

The woman who may have her own good reasons for keeping it a secret -- or the woman who prefers not to make her abortion out to be a political statement -- or the woman who's abortion was the result of another medical condition -- or -- the woman who just happens to CHOOSE to live a private life, and it's nobody else's business but hers...

I suspect there may be as many - if not more - of these women than those who want to "Shout" about it --
Salmon Polka (Bloomington, IN)
I think the point here is that women who cannot come out about their experiences with abortion (due to concerns about domestic abuse, loss of employment, death threats in certain communities, etc.) benefit when other women do. That's why I go to the rallies in support of Planned Parenthood - not because I think my presence will save abortion rights, but because I want women who have not been given as much support as I have to know that there are other people out there supporting them. Of course every woman should have a right to privacy about their medical decisions, but the widespread assumption that abortion should only ever be mentioned in hushed whispers is incredibly damaging. Abortion is not a necessary evil, it is necessary. It is not "just 3%" of what Planned Parenthood does; it is an incredibly important and, often, lifesaving portion of what the organization offers to women.
rbyteme (waukegan, il)
Is there another reason besides shame or fear of harassment that a woman would want to hide her abortion? Personally I find those are both lousy reasons, not because they are chosen willingly, but because some very ugly behavior by other people makes choosing them necessary.
Empirical Conservatism (United States)
You're surely correct, and so are they. But their discretion here is their choice, as was their abortion. That's the point.
Notafan (New Jersey)
I, an older man, watched the women of my generation fight for every right they have, defending feminism, shouting it loudly and clearly and proudly and winning the world we live in today. Women did that, sometimes with the help of men, often without that help and too often against the opposition of men.

Young women in this country take for granted what their mothers and grandmothers won. They had better wake up and make sure they keep those rights and advance them, especially the right to choose because there are wicked, bigoted forces throughout the nation but centered in the male-centric Republican Party that would make of them what Saudi Arabia makes of women, chattel.

Women's rights in this nation are at risk now as they have not been in 40 years and the first people who need to get in line to defend, protect and expand them are young women between the ages of 20 and 40.

Nothing is automatic in this world and if you choose to stand with your mothers and grandmothers then you will find many of us men, your fathers and grandfathers and, yes, today, your husbands, standing with you.

But you must awaken, young women, to the danger looming over your lives. Your gender has more votes than does mine. Use them, vote, vote for women.
Kate (M)
Thank you Notafan for your beautifully articulated sentiments. I grew up in the 60s and 70s and I've been dismayed to see the rights that women fought for so hard, slowly being dismantled by the Republicans. The young women that I work with have absolutely no concept of what the world was like for women just a few decades ago. If they don't start to take notice of what's happening today, they'll get to experience the repression of 50s for themselves.
Pam (Grosse Pointe, Michigan)
I could not have said this better myself. Women's rights may be the renewed battle cry carried by the baby-boom women who would prefer to be activists than retirees.
Paul Cohen (Hartford CT)
From a wonderful op-ed by Gary Willis in the LA Times:
http://www.latimes.com/la-op-wills4nov04-story.html

“It is not demonstrable that killing fetuses is killing persons. Not even evangelicals act as if it were. If so, a woman seeking an abortion would be the most culpable person. She is killing her own child. But the evangelical community does not call for her execution.

“About 10% of evangelicals, according to polls, allow for abortion in the case of rape or incest. But the circumstances of conception should not change the nature of the thing conceived. If it is a human person, killing it is punishing it for something it had nothing to do with. We do not kill people because they had a criminal parent.

“The subject of abortion is not scriptural. For those who make it so central to religion, this seems an odd omission. Abortion is not treated in the Ten Commandments -- or anywhere in Jewish Scripture. It is not treated in the Sermon on the Mount -- or anywhere in the New Testament. It is not treated in the early creeds. It is not treated in the early ecumenical councils.”

Willis says the issues surrounding abortion are, “…difficult matters, on which qualified people differ (i.e. is a fetus a human person? Does it begin with the fertilization of an egg that attaches to the uterus?). Willis asserts, “The woman is the one closest to the decision. Under Roe vs. Wade, no woman is forced to have an abortion. But those who have decided to have one are able to.”
Tim B (Seattle)
I have always thought it odd, and deeply unfair, that women who are going to a facility which performs abortions can be cajoled, threatened, shamed and demeaned by anti-abortion activists, yet those activists are allowed to do so as long as they stay outside a boundary of a few feet from the women entering the facility.

Imagine a similar scenario at a WalMart, with activists protesting the sale of guns and ammunition as being antithetical to a healthy and life affirming society. The manager at the WalMart store would call the police, the authorities would be come in and quickly break up the gathering, potentially arresting some of those activists.

Why the very obvious double standard?
Jamakaya (Milwaukee)
It's worse than you describe. The "pro-life" demonstrators are often screaming, name-calling and physically intimidating women from the time they park their cars to the moment they enter the door of the clinic. Most clinics have trained corps of volunteer bodyguards to escort patients in. And in 2014 in McCullen v. Coakley, our Supreme Court in a unanimous vote found unconstitutional a Massachusetts law that restricted protesters to a distance of 35 feet from medical facilities.

If you witness what women have to go through every day to obtain legal medical care you would understand that the phrase "war on women" is no hyperbole.
Margo (Boston, MA)
This needs to be shouted from every rooftop. Thank You for your comment. This is SO obvious. People of a certain right wing party are such diabolical hypocrites,
TK (Sunnyvale, CA)
I am pro choice only because the thought of a bunch of middle aged men in high office deciding for a woman in distress disgusts me more than killing a fetus does. It's a woman's choice, and nobody need tell a woman whether to keep quiet about it or to shout it out either. I neither applaud nor condemn Amelia Bonow's decision to go for an abortion because it is not my place to do any of that. I simply recognize it as her right and her right alone. I hope she recognizes that it is not her place to applaud decisions other women might have taken to abort, just as it is not the Republican Party's place to condemn them. And yes, abortions should be safe, legal and rare. I'd hate to live in a society where they are unsafe or illegal, or not rare for that matter.
carol goldstein (new york)
I had a bad infection after my pre-Roe v. Wade hotel room abortion and as a result have not been able to conceive. I was lucky that nothing more serious happened. The abortion was absolutely the right choice for me. I've had a happy and productive life.

When my nieces were teenagers, about a decade ago, I decided that it was time to tell them about my abortion experience. I said that they should feel free to retell my story whenever it seemed useful. Since then I do that myself, the latest three weeks ago at a dinner party where someone was pontificating.

Remember when nobody knew any gay people? And what happened when nearly everyone found out that they knew at least several? It is not an exact analogy, but we need to bring abortion out of the closet.
MPJ (Tucson, AZ)
I am always amused at the comments by men on articles about abortion. I don't know the statistics but I suspect that many men have, at one time or another in their life, had unprotected sex. They really should not have a say in whether abortion is legal or not....and whether women have one or not.
ck (San Jose)
I find that more infuriating than amusing.
Capt. Fantastic (Boston, Ma)
You're "amused?" Hopefully one day you'll grow older and wiser.
The Rabbi (Philadelphia)
If the morning after pill terminated the mother and saved the life of the fetus would the pro-lifers finally be happy?
Kate (New York)
I believe they would. And, they would say that she deserved it.
California Man (West Coast)
If the promiscuous woman remembers to take a BIRTH CONTROL pill before fooling around, would we be having this discussion?

There is NO excuse for an unplanned pregnancy in this country in 2015. None.
Moira (Ohio)
Yes, I believe they would. Their hatred of women knows no bounds.
Phil (ABQ,NM)
So called "pro lifers" making death threats.
And I bet not a single one even thought twice about the contradiction there.
Debbie (NH)
Shout out your abortion…… OK

I had 2 abortions in the late 70s. I have spent the last 30+ years regretting this. I was young , naive, and thought this was the way to keep my man. I sold my soul for what I thought was love. I sometimes see these 2 children in my dreams and hope they have forgiven me. This is my doing alone, my story, my heartache.
Eddie T (Jesup, GA)
I suspect that your experience is much more common than we know. While I do not think that abortion is right, I also think that it is wrong to disparage or try to humiliate a woman who has had an abortion. We all make mistakes and we all can be forgiven. God can forgive and people can forgive. I hope that you sense this forgiveness.
AMM (NY)
I had 1 in 1976. Never regretted it for a second. Raised two kids since then. It was the right decision at the time.
AACNY (NY)
Debbie,

I feel for you. I'm sure you are forgiven. They, we, are are just humans. We all start out young and naive and have to learn some painful lessons on life's journey. Maybe hearing your voice could be helpful to others experiencing your pain.
dEs JoHnson (Forest Hills)
This campaign affects me only insofar as negative reactions to it show how far we are from a well-informed, rational, and caring community. I wish the organizers well. Fear and anger are often associated with tribal allegiance. Those who promote those emotions rather than promoting tolerance have a lot to answer for.
Peter Olafson (La Jolla)
It seems to me that in the current climate this campaign risks exposing participants to even more anguish than they've already experienced. I can't put myself in their shoes, but from where I sit it seems a poor trade.
carol goldstein (new york)
I really genuinely appreciate your concern. However, I have a gentle correction: many of us experienced little anguish in the first place. Pre-Roe there was fear but frankly we couldn't afford the luxury of anguish.
Marcelo (Wolff)
This campaign reflect a moral bankruptcy on the part of the organizers. I am pro-choice and I agree with he right of woman to decide if they will bring their pregnancy to completion or not. But shout your abortion implies that you should be proud of it. Should you be proud that (violent cases aside) you got to the point of making this decision because you or your partner didn't take precautions to avoid it? Should you be proud on spending health resources in stopping a situation that you could have avoided? And finally, understanding that not all woman are prepared for pregnancy, not all woman/man are prepared to be parents, should you be proud that you are ending a potential live?
Woman have the right to choice, but it would be better for everyone in society, and for them too I would assume, if the choice was made by them and/or their partners before sex in the form of pills (they also work the day after), condoms, or any other method you can think that would minimize the chance of pregnancy and subsequent abortion.

I am pro-choice, but I wish people acted in a responsible way so the choice could be avoided as much as possible - it is in many cases a necessary and correct choice, but it is nothing t be proud of.
queenxena (Cleveland, Ohio)
I think some of these women might have had their abortions prior to the morning after pill, etc. The older birth control methods were not as reliable as the newer ones. Also, don't assume they did not use any protection. Also, I tend to agree with you about the shouting out, but that is my decision. These women have the right to view their activities, even the controversial ones, in any manner they believe necessary.
LPC (CT)
Marcelo, I (or I should say, my husband and I) used a condom and spermicide. The condom didn't break--I went blithely about my business until I came up pregnant. A complete shock! It happens.
John (San Rafael)
You are not pro-choice. Were you pro-choice you would understand that there are myriad reasons why women choose to have abortions, and that many of those reasons have absolutely nothing to do with terminating a pregnancy because the couple did not "take precautions." And who are you to determine whether a woman should or should not be proud of her choices?
Cynthia Kegel (planet earth)
Why is their nobody in the reasonable middle about this issue? Abortion is a sad and private decision, not something to shout about. It should be the response to failed birth control or unwanted sex, not an everyday choice. I support a woman's right to control her body until there is a viable fetus, but every lost life is sad. And women should be more responsible about birth control, as Planned Parenthood advocates.
AACNY (NY)
If only we could help women have real control over their bodies to avoid pregnancies. That should be the objective we strive for, not abortion, which is control after the fact.
Sophia (chicago)
With respect, you make a claim that "every lost life is sad."

Sorry but that's making a huge assumption, which is, the zygote, embryo, fetus, is a human life.

It is not.

Let me clarify: claiming that a fetus = a person is a religious judgement with which a great many people, probably a majority, disagree.

A person is capable of living, thinking, breathing and being outside the mother's body, period.

And you're making another huge assumption, which is that people just go out and have abortions "every day."

Please.

As for the loss of life being sad, sure - what about animals? I don't eat meat, fish or birds or any other animal. They are sentient creatures, beautiful, alive, intelligent, sentient creatures.

How about you? Do you think of them being slaughtered?
Robin M. (Madison, WI)
A am an adult male who is the happy father of two children. My wife has not had to have an abortion, but we don't want any more children (can't afford them financially, couldn't love them as much as we would like, etc., etc.), and if by some chance birth control failed us, it is my fond hope that a safe abortion would be available. I only learned as an adult that my mother had had an abortion at a time when she had already two small children (birth control failed her), and she and my dad were just barely coping with us. I am deeply grateful that she was able to make that choice and hope that my small daughter and the potential wife of my small son can do so someday if they ever need to. You don't have to look at #shoutyourabortion long to see that it (in my opinion, anyway) celebrates not abortion but the availability of positive life choices for mothers and fathers, for the children they already have, for the children they may have when they are more ready for it, and for a society that needs strongly family units of whatever makeup. Bless the women who started it.
Catherine2009 (St Charles MO)
If you really, really don't want any more children you can have a tubal ligation (for women) or a vastectomy (man). Note: some religions are against these operations.
Basic Human Being (USA)
How about shout your right not to have your private reproductive choices made public?
Deborah Moran (Houston)
Most people would prefer to keep their sexual preferences private, too. But the LGBT community had their rights trampled until they came out of the dark. This campaign is voluntary as was theirs, but it is what is needed to counter those who would take away women's rights because they mistake abortion for murder. They are not and have never been the same thing.
dobes (<br/>)
Go ahead - and you'll get about as far as gay people did before "I'm gay and I'm proud" became the norm.
Acker (Gal)
I'm not on social media but yeah, I had an abortion. $190 and no regrets, 1986. No regrets. It's legal, you know.
another mom (midwest)
me too, not on social media & 1986 abortion, no regrets
Meadowbrook Women's Clinic
a suburban medical building
local doctors
covered by employer health plan with a referral, so no fee was involved simply viewed as one of their covered medical services
places like this do not exist anymore
Shaun Narine (Fredericton, Canada)
I am fully in favour of a woman's right to choose whether or not to have a child. Full access to safe and good abortion services is a critical right. However, that being said, an abortion inevitably results in the loss of a potential human life. That is not something to be celebrated. It is something to be treated with solemnity and respect, even if the woman who has had the abortion feels it was the best thing for her to do. Valuing life and recognizing how we are interconnected should leave room to mourn for this loss of life. If we are truly going to build a humane and decent society that respects all life then it does not make sense to trivialize something important and tragic.
limarchar (Wayne, PA)
Everyone of a woman's billions of eggs is a potential life, and every month the ends at least one egg's potential. Menopause ends them all. Should women mourn every month of their reproductive lives?
dredpiraterobts (Same as it never was)
If I may.

More than.... maybe not "more"... Other tha... nope.

What this effort does for me (and I hope it does for others) is it puts a different socio economic and racial perception on the table.

From a pro choice, leftisht (as in not an activist) Pro Planned Parenthood on principal person. I tend to see Planned Parenthood as an innercity service. This has always seemed to be the brand of PP. It's down town, not suburbia.

It has always been an observation of mine that the Anti Choice crowd wants the image of the user of the abortion clinic to be perceived as those "Godless black girls who use abortion as birth control!" (when they're not having babies to collect welfare, according to the, face it, they're anti black at least too.) And yet, all the pictures of the aborted children are white children. (Which makes those black girls aborting white babies all the more infuriating!)

But, obviously, the clients at PP are also our sisters (we white guys). Our wives. they were our mothers.

This changes the dynamic from "Take it away from 'Them'!" to "This Service (PP) is something that serves us all."

The point should be made. And it should become part of the informed decision that Americans make.

That this has done that. I commend those who have played a role.

Thank you.
LPC (CT)
I am proud to say that as a white woman who grew up in the suburbs, Planned Parenthood provided me with valuable service on at least two occasions: when, at 17, I wanted to go on the Pill but was too embarrassed to involve my mother, and then when, at 22, I needed a Pap smear and had no insurance. No abortions! And both clinics were in the suburbs.
tony (wv)
The only reason this is a controversial news story is that women are disrespected and subjugated by men. The stigma they feel if they've had an abortion is injury upon injury.
Progressive advances beyond horrors like witch hunts, the legal beating and selling of "wives" and lost civil rights are already forgotten by young people, unless they're in history class, but these offenses were quite recent. Men created the modern major religions at the expense of women. These beliefs about what is essentially the supernatural are behind this new attack. And the power of men over women's bodies continues. So look ye over your wars, your fields of bodies, your brutalized living people before claiming your moral high ground about life.
We can no longer leave women powerless to control their destinies because we need to finish what can only be done as a people together without regard for gender: reducing poverty and disease and war.
Women should be free to control the destinies of their bodies and to determine their childbirths. Birth control, pregnancy planning, counseling, disease awareness and prevention, openness and honesty are a huge part of what Planned Parenthood are about. The result of these initiatives are improved infant mortality, fewer dangerous, illegal abortions, better health...stronger women and children.
donnie (colorado)
Well stated! It's health care for the whole life span of a women
Jeremy (Indiana)
"Ms. Bonow...has temporarily left her apartment, bothered by angry tweets wishing her dead. The effort went viral and drew more than 150,000 tweets, showing how volatile and emotional an issue abortion still is"

No, this does not show how volatile and emotional the issue is.

It shows how intolerant, violent, and cruel some anti-abortion people are.
Ridem (KCMO (formerly Wyoming))
The irony of it. She has temporarily left her apartment, bothered by angry tweets wishing her dead. Death threats from Pro-Lifers? Guess you need a la carte with your beliefs.
Eugene Mosier (Barcelona)
The logic (if you can call it that) of the anti-abortion movement is all about the sanctity of life of fetuses only. Not the mothers, and not the same fetuses after they are born. This mindset uses fetuses as ideological weapons to impose their morality on others but they really don't care about the children those fetuses might become. If they did they would be campaigning to end child poverty and malnutrition. but for the most part they don't because it's not about life. It's about feeling outraged and superior. A theater of morality that makes them feel like they are doing something significant.
Concerned Citizen (Anywheresville)
It's more likely the threats are from internet trolls, who just like to exploit any situation and torment anyone they can.
sweinst254 (nyc)
I agree. In fact, there has not been one reported case of such threats on social media from trolls having resulted in an actual attack.
Matthew (Tallahassee)
Not so useful. Most women, quite simply, approach an abortion--what might have been--with misgivings and sometimes sadness. They have a right to BOTH their feelings and to have an abortion.
SMB (Savannah)
Anti-abortion zealots have targeted doctors for murder and clinics for bombs. They are domestic terrorists who also harass women on sidewalks, and online.

These are delusional and extreme people. Be very careful of them. They have zero morality, being willing to interfere in the reproductive decisions of women whom they know nothing about. They do not care if an abortion was necessary due to health reasons or whether the woman would die or whether the fetus would die or suffer or whether the girl or woman was the victim of incest or rape.

These are unbalanced and dangerous people. Be very careful providing them with a target. While it is brave to provide this information, these are in no way normal people who will kill, commit fraud, bully, harass, and threaten the women involved.
Laura (Florida)
But we keep being told that abortion is such a difficult choice for women and that they never approach it lightly or without regret. And that nobody is "pro-abortion". Hm.
limarchar (Wayne, PA)
You're confusing pro-lifers with pro-choicers. Few pro-choicers are claiming that women who get abortions have regrets. Frankly, that is not what the evidence shows. For the most part, they don't. Studies show women who give babies up for adoption have many more regrets than those who have abortions.

And why should they have regrets? What they have done IS NOT WRONG.
Phil (ABQ,NM)
That's the whole point. Instead of what you "keep being told" (by who?), it's time to hear more from the actual people who've had an abortion.
Jerry Attrich (Port Townsend, WA)
Don't you think that the anti-choice zealots, who would shoot doctors, vandalize clinics, terrorize and harass women, that these "good" folks might not draw the line at LYING to you about something like this?
kj (nyc)
I wonder if the campaign wants people who had abortions and regret them to shout that out as well? Honestly, I think it would be helpful.

There is so much dishonesty on each side of this issue it makes me cringe. I know I am not alone in this, and many people may not want to "Shout their abortion" because while they may be pro-choice, they do think it more complicated than all the "campaigns" would like to make it out to be. Call it a "choice" if you must--but most women I know think of it as a heartbreaking choose that caused them great distress. How about we include them in the conversation and stop assuming that the "whisper" is about felling shame over what others think. I am so tired of politics on both sides drowning out reasonable voices--and this is putting women in a terrible, misinformed position. (ugh).
Steve Bolger (New York City)
Why don't you be honest and admit that you are deliberately guilt-tripping other people?
Lisa Goldstein (Virginia)
#ShoutYourAbortion, are you kidding me? Unless you are the exception, domestic violence, rape, medically necessary, why would you ever want to shout about having had unprotected sex or your birth control failed or you just did not want the byproduct of a sexual encounter? Safe and legal, absolutely. Women should support each other to make good choices, improve access to sex education, birth control and to handle the consequences of an unwanted pregnancy. I think you should feel badly having had an abortion. If it was due to rape or incest, a horrible procedure to endure on top of everything else. More so if it was simple because it was the easier choice.
Steve Bolger (New York City)
I think rape would go extinct in just a few generations if no fetus initiated by rape made it through gestation.
limarchar (Wayne, PA)
Oh yes, women must be punished somehow. If society won't punish them, they should punish themselves. Bad, bad girls for having birth control failures.
Concerned Citizen (Anywheresville)
@limarchar: only a tiny percentage of all abortions are done due to BC failure -- maybe .5% or less.

Another tiny percentage is for rape, or health of the mother, or a defective fetus.

About 98% of all abortions are done on healthy normal women carrying healthy normal fetuses -- who simply did not use contraception or used it inconsistently.
Socrates (Verona, N.J.)
If we're going to regulate uteruses, then we should regulate the sperm and the testicles that cause the unintended and unwanted pregnancies.

....and all the Christian, hypocritical misogynists grew suddenly and mysteriously silent and perplexed at such an even-handed thought.
Frank (Boston)
So, Socrates, are you giving money to the Parsemus Foundation to fund safe, effective, long-acting male birth control?

Or, like Planned "Parenthood" (which still tells men to use the withdrawal method for birth control, and refuses to fund research to bring safe, effective male birth control to market) don't you really give a good g-damn about a man's right to choose whether to become a father?

And don't talk to me about condoms. They fail 17% of the time in typical use.
hct (emp_has_no_pants_on)
And what is your proposal on how to regulate "the sperm and the testicles"?
Matt (RI)
Hypocritical misogynists to be sure, but why do you specify Christian? Are there no Jewish, Muslim or Atheist hypocrites? Hypocrisy is rife among fundamentalist ideologues of all stripes.
gigi (Oak Park, IL)
I have always believed that "safe, rare, and legal" was the answer to the wrong question. There should be no need to justify a medical procedure for women, any more than there is need to justify a medical procedure for men. The question of whether to have an abortion is strictly between a woman and her doctor. The government and the public at large should have no say in the matter.
TM (NYC)
As a man, I wish men felt as bad about going through an abortion as women... I think that's part of the problem here: society singles out women to somehow bear the responsibility and guilt for undergoing an abortion, whereas men are supposed to just 'provide a ride to the clinic and a few bucks' and that's it.
donnie (colorado)
I wish more men thought about pregnancy and birth control as much as women have to month after month for like 35 years!!
CAMeyer (Montclair, NJ)
Whatever one's views on abortion, this shout your abortion thing is worrying. As the shooting in Oregon today reminds us, guns are ubiquitous in the United States, and for whoever doesn't already have a gun, very little stands in the way of getting one. Militant opponents of abortion can rationalize that if making an example of one abortion shouter deters at least one other woman from having an abortion, it's well worth the cost. Some might even say that an admitted "baby killer" deserves to die, per "God's law."
M Anderson (Bridgeport)
When I was 14 in the late 1950s  I was seduced by a man of 32.  Pregnant and parentless, I went to a drug store and bought multiple medications labeled "Not to be taken by pregnant women" and took them in large quantities.  The miniscule fetus was aborted.   I was fortunate that I neither died nor had a deformed child, and that 12 years later I could bear a wanted and loved child within a happy marriage. I never regretted that decision. Outlawing abortion will not prevent abortions.
B (Hawaii)
Did you also file rape charges? I don't think you can give consent at 14 to a 32 year old creep.
Rodger Lodger (NYC)
In the 1950s (and today) she would have been taking the chance of being shamed by the authorities, getting in a huge conflict with her parents or guardian, and possibly put in a home for "wayward" girls. Best you not make suggestions about events and times you are unfamiliar with.
Christine (California)
You are correct, outlawing abortions will not prevent abortions. Does anyone remember the 1960's? I do. The number one hospital procedure amongst all the women I knew or heard about was the D&C. Many of my girlfriends mothers were having it preformed. I had no idea what it was. Now I do.

It was abortion done by doctors in hospitals for the rich white women who had medical insurance. What hypocrisy!

All these screaming white republican men with their abortion mantra, little do they know that most of their mothers had one! I remember.

NYT please do an article on D&C in the 50's and 60's. Go in depth and make the kids know the truth.
munoz04 (Queens)
Ugh! All the usual comments about women needing to take responsibility for getting pregnant in the first place, as if that is a one-sided dance. So women should take sole responsibility for getting pregnant but cannot be allowed the responsibility of choosing what to do with their own bodies after they are pregnant.

Stop talking about women as if we have no agency, as if we are simply vessels to care precious children.

And for the record, I had an abortion. Judge as you wish. Then consider this: I had to terminate my very much wanted 17 week fetus because multiple ultrasounds and MRIs concluded that her brain stem failed to develop. So I should be embarrassed and ashamed that I chose to end a pregnancy that would have resulted in a brain dead child and would have wreaked havoc on my body? Again, for the record, it actually should not matter why I had an abortion because it is my body and I get to decide what to do with it and I get to decide what is best for me and my family.
James (Atlanta)
It's not your body that you should be primarily concerned about. It is the body of the living person inside you that should be the major concern once you have conceived it. The writing of five men on the Supreme Court can't change that anymore than they could change the moral right of Dred Scott to be free of slavery
C's Daughter (NYC)
Why should it be the *primary* concern over my own body?

Pro-tip: forced gestation is slavery. :D
Julia (TX)
Your comment made me cry. I'm sorry you had to face that choice.
JRMW (Minneapolis)
What is the goal of this Twitter endeavor?

It has the chance of success if the goal is to reopen the decades-long debate on abortion. (although the outcome of such a debate may not go well. we've been having this debate nonstop for decades)

My fear, however, is that this Twitter campaign will harm Planned Parenthood.

Planned Parenthood does many things. They are a wonderful source of women's health care. Many Americans support Planned Parenthood's vision, DESPITE (not because of) abortion.

In order to protect Planned Parenthood we will need to keep the support of people who believe in women's health even if they disagree with abortion.

Putting abortion front and center has the potential to destroy Planned Parenthood's message (that they are more than an abortion clinic) and plays right into the rabid right wing's plans.
dbg (Middletown, NY)
The goal is to show the religious right wing fanatics that they aren't the only ones who have voices.
Anthony2816 (California)
Republican leaders not "pro-life". They are only "pro-fetal-life". Once the baby is born, they have no interest in its well-being at all.
queenxena (Cleveland, Ohio)
Actually, they do not care if the fetus dies because its mother cannot get health care or good nutrition or works a dangerous job or lives in a very polluted environment. They only care about the fetus if the woman, not their party, decides it should not live.
NotMyRealName (Washington DC)
A vast number of people who call to outlaw abortion are the most eager to start wars. This contradiction shows these people are less interested in saving life than in forcing their arbitrary beliefs onto others.
Abby (Key West, FL)
I will give the anti-abortion howling credibility when that same crowd publicly, and very loudly, expresses remorse over the killing of pregnant Iraqi women at the hands of the US government and its trumped-up "wars," AND when it attaches to its "Bomb Iran!" mantra the raising of taxes to support escape routes for pregnant women within that country.

In other words, if you would apply your objections consistently, you might be a bit more respected in your views. Until then, you will continue to look as you do now: restless and bored, with the very un-creative solution of meddling into other people's affairs.
M.L. Chadwick (Maine)
Well, I had an abortion back in the 1960s. It was very traumatic, but only because it was extremely difficult to obtain. I went on to finish college, marry, and have children and grandchildren, none of which could have happened had I not had the abortion.

I strongly support women's right to choose. Always have, always will. It will be interesting to see how many attempts at "slut-shaming" will be offered by would-be pregnancy enforcers who are certain they and their sisters-daughters-mothers-wives will never, ever need an abortion...
Coolhunter (New Jersey)
Sadly, it is always about 'me', not the unborn child. You will never know the greatness and joy that child could have brought you and the world.
Elfego (New York)
From the article: One (sic) her Facebook page, Ms. Bonow said “having an abortion made me happy in a totally unqualified way. Why wouldn’t I be happy that I was not forced to become a mother?”

This is simply one of the most disgusting, reprehensible, inhumane things I have ever heard a human being utter. By this logic, Charles Manson should be proud of ordering the murder of Sharon Tate, since she was subsequently "not forced to become a mother."

If you don't want to get pregnant, keep your legs closed. If you do get pregnant, how is that the fault of the child that was created by your bad choices? And, how do those bad choices mean that you're being "forced" to become a mother? Forced by whom? By the unborn baby?

So, killing the baby is a matter of self-defense, defending yourself against a baby that wouldn't exist, if *you* had just made better choices?

Holy freakin' wow!

This entire article makes me want to wash my mind out with soap. As is so often said on the Internet, this is something that I'll "never be able to unsee." Wow, I'm actually sick to my stomach right now...
Zejee (New York)
It's not a baby; it's a fetus. No one should be forced to bear a child. Make contraception widely and freely available for all.
AMM (NY)
Oh just get over yourself Elfego. You'll never be pregnant, accidentally or otherwise, so just zip it. It's not your issue, you'll never face that dilemma. It's none of your business. And just FYI, I've had an abortion. And so did my sister-in-law, and my other sister-in-law, and a few of my friends, and at least 3 of my co-workers. I could go on and on. If you're in a room with at least 3 women, statistically one of them has had an abortion. Those numbers have stayed the same whether the procedure was legal at the time or not.
Sean C. (Charlottetown)
There's a rather obvious logical gap in your comparison, that being, nobody is arguing that people be forced to have abortions, which is what your Charles Manson example would equate to. If Sharon Tate wanted an abortion, it was her right to have one.
Alberto (New York, NY)
A very dear friend once told me that she had many abortions when she was young because no contraceptive method worked for her until finally she used a cooper T DUI. So, if she had been dumb enough to listen to "pro-lifers" (who not so curiously tend to be pro-death penalty and pro-war) she would have been brought many unwanted children to a life they did not ask for.
sweinst254 (nyc)
There were no condoms available where she lived?
Longue Carabine (Spokane)
Live by the internet and social media, take your lumps from same and don't complain.
John D (San Diego)
I am pro-choice.

Abortion, except in cases of rape, incest or medical necessity, is failure. Period.

Failure to plan, to prepare, to accept consequences.

Have the abortion. It's your right. Learn from your mistake, and try not to repeat it. I accept your choice. Just don't expect me to applaud.
C's Daughter (NYC)
You have a really dim view of motherhood and children if you think that someone should become a mother in order to "accept consequences."

What a sad way of looking at one of life's biggest and most important decisions- as a punishment.
Robin M. (Madison, WI)
Nonsense. Or, perhaps, a certain very, very limited and sad sense. Unless you yourself have been celibate your whole life, you might recognize that abortion can be the result of "failure" of condoms or an IUD or other birth control, "failure" of someone you thought would be a reliable partner to stick around, or just plain "failure" to understand when you were young and naive and hormonally hyped up and sexually inexperienced what the consequences might be of having sex. As a man who feels that men must be equally if not more responsible for birth control than women (men can walk away from the consequences of a "failure", at least in theory), those to me all seem like pretty legitimate kinds of failing. You don't have to applaud the practice, but you could recognize the need for it more broadly.
Eugene Mosier (Barcelona)
I doubt many women care whether you approve or not. But hey, thanks for saying you're pro-choice even if you're not really clear on what it means.
Michael Brothers (Boone, Iowa)
I do not buy that 33% of women have had abortions, no more than I buy that 10% of the population is homosexual. Both stats have their roots in flawed research and constant repetition. I don't know what the true numbers are, and may never know, since these are issues people tend to be dishonest about on surveys.
LPC (CT)
I think you'd be very surprised if you asked some women, and they chose to answer you honestly.
Jamakaya (Milwaukee)
These stats are from the Guttmacher Institute:

At least half of American women will experience an unintended pregnancy by
age 45, and at 2008 abortion rates, one in 10 women will have an abortion by
age 20, one in four by age 30 and three in 10 by age 45.

About 61% of abortions are obtained by women who have one or more children.

Half of pregnancies among American women are unintended, and four in 10 of
these are terminated by abortion.
carol goldstein (new york)
By your logic 33% is then a low-ball estimate, since it is unlikely that many women who have not had abortions would lie and say that they had.
elizcox123 (Connecticut)
If life begins at conception, so should child support.
Jamakaya (Milwaukee)
Amen.
Truc Hoang (West Windsor, NJ)
Agreed. And like to mod and add,
"If life begins at conception, so should wife support."
MJS (Atlanta)
My children that I choose to have, while married even! Guess what the father hasn't paid a dime of child support in six years and 10 months. I had a order. For back child support served for him while he was in jail on a DUI last fall and the Sherrff left him out. He did not show up for court where he was ordered to be in arrears $120,000 plus. That was a year ago.

He fled to Canada with his new wife he met on J-date. With that fools two children!
Eilat (New York)
Gosh, what brave women! I so admire their courage and honesty, and am trying now as a woman in her 30s to match it 'coming out' in this public way. Raised in a conservative Christian home, my parents wept to discover my abortion and told my 17-year old self, prey of a much older man who pretended he did not know how to wear a condom, that I committed murder, and God may forgive me but I have to work for it. On the phone with my mother last night, as she spoke about atoning for my sins and coming back to God, I proudly announced my abortion and reaffirmed how it has saved my life. I have no regrets!! She-devil I am, but how liberating it feels to own up to my fundamental right to exercise my own agency over my life. Bravo to these women!
Micah (Richland, WA)
And bravo to you, Eilat. Abortion is under attack by religious extremists, and we need women to let their voices be heard. Thanks for adding yours.
Carla (Cleveland, OH)
If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.
Nita (Philadelphia, PA)
I find this tactic immature and embarrassing. Shout your abortion? Why? So your employers can know you've been sexually irresponsible? Your neighbors? Younger people in your family who look up to you to make smart decisions on the front end, not scramble to have to make fetal life and death choices on the back end?

I don't get it. I'm 39 and I've had my share of lovers. I come from a highly fertile family, too (my mother is the second of 14, my dad the third of 11, and I'm the eldest of five. No multiple marriages, either; same mother/father, husband/wife for each set of kids.) And yet, I've never been pregnant. Not even a scare. I consciously made the effort to not conceive until the time and man were right, and that may never line up, who knows. I'm in a serious relationship now, but I have no plans to toss the rubbers until the ink on the marriage license dries.

What I don't get is how so many of these young women are conceiving unwanted babies in the first place. That's ignorant. I never invested in some elaborate, expensive mode of contraception. My lovers and I have always used condoms, and when used correctly, they are highly effective. I don't care about "coitus interruptus", a lessening of the sensation, or that my partner "doesn't want to." As a woman, being in charge of your life means being smart proactively, and not getting yourself trapped in a preventable catastrophe. I may be liberal, but sexual recklessness is crazy.

#Shout your prophylactics.
LPC (CT)
This comment is a good example of why these women want people to talk more openly about their abortions. Not all women planned badly or were irresponsible or were young and ignorant when they got pregnant and chose to have an abortion. If we start hearing more women's stories, misconceptions about the 'kind' of person who gets an abortion will fall away.
C's Daughter (NYC)
Pro-tip: contraception can fail. So why is it that you're whining about "sexual irresponsibility?" Why the constant need to shame women?

You've never been pregnant. Bully for you. That doesn't mean that everyone else is so lucky.
TK (Sunnyvale, CA)
LPC, everything needn't be a movement. Abortion as a constitutional right is a testament to the common sense in people (who have, since Roe v Wade, not cared for making it unconstitutional through the political process).
TPierre Changstien (bk,nyc)
Look when it comes down to it nearly all abortions are done for the convenience of the "mother" at the expense of the unborn child. You were too busy, or don't like kids, or you didn't want to make the sacrifice, or whatever... and so you decided it would be easier if the unborn human growing inside of you were disappeared.

There will always be a certain degree of shame associated with choosing personal comfort over needs of the vulnerable and helpless. I would hope our society never loses that. Abortion is always the taking of a living human life. It is a brutal and disgusting practice that is an open wound on our civilisation's soul, and the attitude with which these women discuss it callous and inhumane.
MGK (CT)
Sir,
Your comments that the mother does not care are both self serving and just plain wrong. It is still none of your business!

The mother does it not for convenience but to not to create an unwanted child who will not a have chance to experience the best that life has to offer. Single mothers don't have the resources or the time to give their children the life that they are entitled to.

Your tone is both assumed and callous and should be condemned...shame on you!
Steve Bolger (New York City)
I think your soul didn't begin to develop until you were born.
Gaijinjoy (Winter Park, FL)
A bean-sized piece of matter has potential, but it is not a child. I don't consider an early-term abortion to be the taking of a life. Life to me is when the fetus is viable outside of the uterus.
A. Stanton (Dallas, TX)
When I was growing up in the fifties, it was fairly common for married pregnant women with money and connections who were past the period in their lives when they wanted more children to seek out physicians in the community who were willing to do abortions in their offices. My impression of one of these doctors that I personally knew was that, far from being a quack or an exploiter of families in distress, he was a good, experienced physician basically motivated by a desire to help out people who were in trouble. It helped that he was protected against prosecution by the law by the fact that many prominent people in the community came to be personally aware of
the value and need for his services. This has always been my preferred model of medical care. Personal services provided by personal doctors. No agitation for or against medical procedures regardless of the type, absolute confidentiality, total privacy.
Anthony N (NY)
To A. Stanton:

I, too, recall the 1950s. But, I recall another version of what you relate.
There were also married women without money and without connections who sought and had abortions. Those, many not doctors, who performed them for those women were often called "butchers". And I also recall the reason why.
Carl Ian Schwartz (<br/>)
Not everyone in need can afford this luxury.
Yes, in the 1950s there were discreet physicians who served women with these needs. It was actually depicted in both the novel "Peyton Place" and the excellent movie made of it in 1957, where a woman raped by her father very quietly had the fetus aborted in a small New England town.
Lisa Wesel (Maine)
I agree. And this is why Planned Parenthood is so desperately needed, for all those women with neither money nor connections.
Not Sure (central nj)
This news hits very close to home. I had the exact same idea about 6 months ago, but being a neophyte with Twitter/social media I couldn't get my idea off the ground and decided I also didn't have enough followers to make it go anywhere at all. I'm very lucky that I didn't know how to accomplish the task or I too would be under attack and threatened by those who continue to seek control of women's reproductive lives and health. We are sadly mistaken if we believe that Twitter and other forms of social media are good places to safely exchange ideas we might disagree about. People feel free to threaten and belittle others without consequence.
Brave New World (Northern California)
One in three women have had abortions? Even if you believe in abortion, that's a tragedy.
Alberto (New York, NY)
That is a tragedy to you.
To me Tragedy is most of the human activity I read about in the News everyday.
Zejee (New York)
So maybe contraception should be freely and readily available to all.
Brave New World (Northern California)
Absolutely! And people should know (be taught) how to use it and how to gratify themselves and their partners when it doesn't happen to be available.
Elfego (New York)
From the article: “Even women who support abortion rights have been silent, and told they were supposed to feel bad about having an abortion.”

Well... Yeah, they *are* supposed to feel bad about it!

Just because something is legal doesn't make it right and just because something may be necessary doesn't mean you should feel good about it.

I mean, really, is that so hard to understand?
sarasotaliz (Sarasota)
Would you like to share your own abortion experience? I'm sure it'd be very helpful to everyone.
Martin (New York)
Elfego: I think some women need to say that they don't feel guilty about their abortion because other people (not to mention any names) think it's their place to pass judgment on decisions they know nothing about and that isnt any of their business.
Eugene Mosier (Barcelona)
You mean you think they should feel bad about it. That speaks volumes about you. Some people on your side of this debate think people should feel bad about using birth control, and would like to prevent access to it. Some people on your side of this debate think people should feel bad about having and enjoying sex, and try to shame them for it. It's all about feeling superior to others and trying to control them.
Just because you object to abortion doesn't make it wrong, and that anyone is obligated to feel bad about it.
I mean really, is that so hard to understand?
Lisa Evers (NYC)
I think Shout Your Abortion is really onto something fundamental.

How many people continue to want their names kept private when they've been the victim of a sexual crime? Clearly the reasoning behind this is because society as a whole, and perhaps many victims themselves, feel they have something to be 'ashamed' of...they fear they will be stigmatized. But I firmly believe that so long as people think this way and act this way, it becomes self-fulfilling. I wish victims would take more of a stand and publicize their own names as a way to show that indeed, they have no more reason to feel 'shame' than someone who got their purse stolen or who had their car stolen.

How many people hide the fact that they were in an abusive relationship?

In all the above instances, there is an implication of shame, and that for this reason these occurrences should be kept 'private'.
Steve Bolger (New York City)
How many people know that there are thousands of rape kits the police have never even analyzed?
Romy Garcia (Austin, Texas)
While I don't agree that having had an abortion should be a point of pride, I do think that those of us who have had one (myself included) need to show who we are in some way and put faces to this issue. We aren't who the opposed expect us to be: we are their neighbors, their colleagues, and their family. Until then, organizations like Planned Parenthood will be in the crosshairs and take the heat for those of us who have made this choice.
KC (Washington State)
'Has shown how volatile and emotional the issue remains.' Seriously? Seems to me there is quite a bit of room in between reacting emotionally to something and terrorizing the person who said it. Amelia Bonow is getting death threats and had her address published--that's not showing that abortion remains a divisive issue, that's showing that the internet remains a dangerous place for women. I'd love to see the public editor's take on your subhead.
S. Grant (Colorado)
Decisions about whether or not to have children are highly personal, and the insistence that there is only one answer no matter what the circumstances is not just intrusive but authoritarian. I don't think I've ever met an American who truly wants an authoritarian regime, but most of us are more than willing to impose cherished beliefs on others if we see it as in the best interest of society at large. The problem always is that we don't all have the same understanding of "best interests." In my opinion, "right to life" is much broader than "right to be born." Those who are so willing to protect the right to life that they're threatening to kill anyone who doesn't share their view obviously only believe in the right to be born. They tend to underscore that belief by fighting to take away anything that helps to support that life after it's born. Their passion in their beliefs is clear, but their commitment to supporting life is pretty questionable. I'm not the first to point this out, I won't be the last; these strident voices will, for me, never really represent a true respect for life.
Memi (Canada)
I guess, not being hip with the latest meanings of words, I have a wee bit of a problem with the word "shout". While I do understand why women who have chosen to have an abortion should not have to be shamed for a decision that was probably wrenching enough, why does the decision and experience have to be shouted about?

Again, that's just me thinking the word shout means shout with all the usual connotations instead of the ones that are "dot nose" now.
Carsafrica (California)
Tragically my family has suffered through generations of Huntington,s Disease.
However as the gene can now be identified in the early stage of pregnancy ,the younger generation has been able to abort and in doing so have ensured that their children and future generations will be free of this devastating disease.
Only parents can make this very difficult decision it has to be their choice and no one else's .
Incidentally none of the family live in the USA
Steve Bolger (New York City)
People want to ban abortion in cases of genetic defects detected during pregnancy here in this crazy country.
swm (providence)
When I was in college, I took a friend to the Planned Parenthood in Brookline, MA to have an abortion. A few days later the clinic was shot up. We were on winter break at the time, but saw each other on New Years Eve a few days later. When we saw each other, we went straight into a private room, hugged, cried, and talked.

We have to find ways to make the right to medical services safe for everyone, including those who are not able to accept the right to have an abortion. I don't think that will happen on Twitter, and more than anything, I don't want to see any unhinged person erupt in violence because they can't handle the noise about the issue.
dobes (<br/>)
I remember that! I also went to that clinic, in Cleveland Circle, for birth control and for an abortion, though it was a while before the shooting. Unbelievable that people think violence is the answer to every disagreement and grievance. And ridiculous to think you're preventing killing by killing!
ejzim (21620)
Right-wingers would like to force women to do what they want. Left wingers would not. Simple difference.
Paul (Long island)
Here's my shout out. Women have a Constitutional right to an abortion. So far, 820,000 have exercised that right this year of which only 216,000 were performed at Planned Parenthood (according to the Guttmacher Institute). Fortunately, we do not have Christian Sharia law here despite the Republican Party's endless attempts to do so. Women may die if they proceed with their pregnancy or they may have been raped or are teens who know little about birth control often thanks to Republicans who have blocked access to it as they did in Colorado and are trying now in Congress--all have this essential Constitutional right and no Pope or ayatollah or any of their followers has the right to enforce their views on women and men who do not share them.
JK (Boston)
I'm conflicted about this. There's already too much shouting when it comes to abortion. It's such a deeply personal and often painful decision. These women deserve our understanding and support. I'm not sure this campaign is helpful even if the instinct behind it is sincere. We need less provocation and antagonism on this issue, not more.
Charlie Newman (Chicago)
Endless cheers for the pro-choice women who are taking charge of this fight outside of the legal/governmental playing field.

People who say the government should stay out of our lives and then insert themselves into the lives of others are relentless.
People who defend personal freedom can afford to be no less determined and committed.

No facet of this fight should be without both defense and offense.
gemli (Boston)
Shouting your abortion may seem abhorrent to some, but hiding your abortion may do more even more harm. We forget that abortion is a legal right, and that it was granted because of the human cost to women who had no safe option. Banning abortion will not make it go away, but it will drive it back underground.

The right to life movement needs to consider that often they are agitating for an unwanted child's right to life with a woman who is unable, unwilling or unready to care for a child. No one takes abortion lightly, especially the woman who makes such decision. If shouting your abortion exposes the reality of impossible choices some women have to make, then it needs to happen.
Shiggy (Redding CT)
Taking away a woman's control over her own body is the ultimate loss of self determination and power.
Catherine (New Jersey)
I don't shout our infertility. We don't tweet the heartbreak that we will never be parents. For one thing, it is longer than 144 characters, but mainly because no one wants to hear about it. So we keep it to ourselves and we cry. It's hard to fathom that the one and only thing we want in life (a child) is given to millions of others who don't want the precious gift that has been handed to them. They don't pass along this gift to someone else, they throw their sons and daughters (mostly daughters) in the trash.
When I was young, I didn't understand how anyone could own slaves, I didn't understand the atrocities of WWII, I didn't understand how the genocide in Rwanda could happen. But when I calculate the sheer magnitude of business in an abortion clinic, I realize that the world is as mad as it ever was.
Zejee (New York)
Oh there are plenty of unwanted children in the world for you to adopt.
Bohemienne (USA)
There are many, many, many existing people who need help. Children, elderly and every stage in between. If you truly have that much love and nurturing to give, it should be easy to find an outlet and way to add meaning and fulfillment to your life while aiding others.

If you just wanted to create an ego-stroking mini-me, well, those are the breaks. We don't all get everything we desire in life.
Michelle (Boston)
Catherine, I hope you become a mom someday. You are not alone in these feelings. I understand your pain and wish you had found more compassion or at the very least, tolerance, from the other commenters.
sarasotaliz (Sarasota)
I had an abortion in 1984. The reason? None of your business.
I have never regretted it. Not once.
west coast (usa)
I had an abortion sometime in the late 70s. Another in the early 80s. I agree, nobody's business. Never regretted them. Not once.

Have two grown children now.
History Major (Whereever)
There is no man in congress qualified to vote regarding abortion. They should all abstain from voting on any issue regarding it.
Peter (Brooklyn)
I'm a moderate. I get routinely mocked for this by friends on either side. As a moderate, I'm reluctantly pro choice, as I believe most moderates are. The combination of Planned Parenthood selling fetal parts (though not for profit it's still abhorrent to me) and now this self-righteous "shout" - is making me question whether I should continue to support the pro choice movement. I heard a radio interview with Amelia Bonow on the BBC and her matter of fact tone, like she was going to get a routine car tune-up, left an impression on me.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0334kcd
Denis Pombriant (Boston)
Fantastic idea, should be a cultural tipping point. Quite brilliant. Another element in the long conservative Going Out of Business Sale of 2015.
Alberto (New York, NY)
Most people obviously live by their emotions, not by conscious reasoning, and this fact about our behavior was observed a very long ago, probably thousands of years ago by those first humans who manipulate the masses with politics and religions, as apes do play politics too, as even the Newt acknowledged some time ago. David Hume wrote about this in the 1700s before this country existed, but people continue ignoring this simple fact, and quite apparently like to pretend they are mostly consciously rational.
But that's false. People are at most unconsciously rational like many other animals. The fact people talk does not mean people really think what they say. In summary Humans are mostly consciously irrational animals, who act based on their emotions and other instincts, and emotions and other instincts are pre-fabricated reasoning which is mostly unconscious to our small consciousness.
Eric (West Palm Beach)
What ever happened to "safe, legal, and rare"?
Alberto (New York, NY)
That is why I stopped donating to Obama this year. Because, like Clinton, he only pretends to support Women's Rights.
Kate De Braose (Roswell, NM)
Few people who write hate letters against abortion have anything on their minds other than to keep up the National Pastime of hating their female acquaintances.
No persons who are that foolish and judgmental could ever be trusted to care for females or for children at any age or stage of life.
We need to ask them to testify in public as to why they believe that anyone else owes them the production of a free infant for any reason whatever.
AR (Virginia)
Wayne Lapierre of the NRA is on the side of those people who wish to exercise their 2nd amendment rights against people making death threats against them under the guise of exercising their 1st amendment rights. Two can play at this absolutist, no-compromise kind of game.
Samantha (Los Angeles)
Oh goodness - in the current heightened (and completely idiotic) terminology, I let a "baby" "die" every month. My understanding (albeit not from personal experience) is that men "kill" millions of "babies" in one single go!

That's nature for you - red in tooth and claw.
Kimbo (NJ)
A challenge?
Seems like hypocrisy. Who wants to know?
Also, the whole issue always was a woman's personal choice, no?
Crusader Rabbit (Tucson, AZ)
Hats off to these young women for their courage.
Rachel (Queens)
I have had an abortion (which I in no way regret, although the experience was emotionally difficult at the time). I am therefore one of those women who should presumably be shouting about it and I know countless other women who are similarly situated.

I feel conflicted about this campaign. The judicial decision in Roe v. Wade is based on a constitutional right to privacy. (One may disagree with the judicial reasoning, but that is in fact the basis of the decision.) One's right to privacy is paradoxical to an exhortation to shout -- why should one have to defend a constitutionally protected private matter by voluntarily relinquishing one's own privacy interests and inviting public scrutiny (or worse)?

Not having an abortion would have jeopardized my mental stability, my job, my ability to support my family. Grief and sadness aside, I will never regret placing my own health and the needs of my family first. I will always stand for women's reproductive rights and for the legitimacy of the full spectrum of emotions women feel about their abortions, including the feeling that they would rather not disclose it.
Carl Ian Schwartz (<br/>)
The GOP TP use of the word "family" is the complete antonym of what this lady went through. It's simply yielding control to some authoritarian creep, or doing so willingly like sheep.
You know what happens to sheep, don't you. They lose their wool, have their milk taken for the benefit of the shepherd, and ultimately lose their lives for meat (killed humanely by a Jewish or Muslim ritual slaughterer if they're lucky). If they're even luckier, they are not sexually abused by the shepherd, but if they are, they can't get pregnant.
Elephant lover (New Mexico)
When I was a freshman in college a beautiful, sweet friend of mine from Girl Scouts when we were younger, died in our dorm from an illegal abortion. This was pre Roe vs. Wade.
Why did she choose abortion ?
a) her boy friend was Jewish and was in school on scholarship and would lose his scholarships if he married.
b) Her parents were what we called "hard shell" Baptists and she didn't think she could tell them of her predicament.
I barely know what the word abortion meant at the time but I have been pro-choice ever since.
I think of my friend every time I donate to Planned Parenthood or a feminist candidate.
Abortion should always be safe and legal.
pepperman33 (Philadelphia, Pa.)
I don't believe that a simple movement such as this can make one feel comfortable aborting a pregnancy. In most cultures abortion is a very private and personal matter.
DEB (NY)
That is mostly true; however, it is our freedoms that make it possible for it to remain private and personal; should those freedoms be taken away we will be back in the days of opportunistic, back door, 'physicians' - many of whom were butchers.
sharon (worcester county, ma)
In these other cultures is the government trying to take access to reproductive choices away from women? Maybe we wouldn't need this kind of movement if the government would stop trying to regulate my uterus!
M (NY)
I support the idea of women publicly sharing about their abortions if they feel they can do so. I had an abortion recently in my 40s after already having a daughter and feeling unable to raise another child. But my daughter is still young and I am an elementary school teacher; I am unwilling at this stage to make it publicly known that I have had an abortion. I appreciate and thank the women who are able to share their stories publicly. It is so important that others see that we who've had abortions are not monsters; we are your mothers, sisters, daughters, and friends.
Sumand (Houston)
There is no reason any body has to boast about having this procedure or shout it out! But one should not feel ashamed or guilty of making this decision if it is right for you at that point in your life .
NK (NYC)
Mary: "No matter what the reason it was done, that's just not something to be proud of."
Having an abortion is am incredibly difficult decision to make for many reasons, but there's no reason to be ashamed either.
Eric F. (NYC)
I don't understand the Congresswoman's statement:

“For you to stand on this floor and suggest as you have that somehow this is a procedure that is either welcome or done cavalierly or done without any thought is preposterous.”

Why is any thought required, if the entity destroyed is just a bunch of cells and not a human life? There seems a disconnect here.
dredpiraterobts (Same as it never was)
Yes, there is a disconnect. As you read, I think you'll figure out where that disconnect is.

Wait a second... what am I doing? I'm going to try to explain a woman's thought process? How would I know? I'm not a woman. And certainly I am not every woman. So I'm doubly wrong if I try to identify "A" thought process when each woman has her own (granted, they fall into several categories but each category has elements of all the others in varying percentages)

The disconnect, Eric F. is yours. I suspect that at some level you know that, because your thought process falls into several categories too, and (as we all do) you just choose which categories to give what weight to.
Sharon Knettell (Rhode Island)
It would depend on her belief that at that point if it was fully a life- and Eric F., it is really none of your business- it is that woman's business and decision to decide that.
sweinst254 (nyc)
I'm 100% pro-choice, but I think abortion is -- and should be -- a wrenching personal decision for a woman. It says a lot about the age we live in that some people believe something so profoundly personal should be shouted from the rafters.

There are some few things that happen in our lives that simply should not be shared in a public forum, and this is one of them. It has nothing to do with shame or politics and everything to do with discretion and decorum.
Bohemienne (USA)
But it's NOT a wrenching decision for many women, that is the entire point. For "100 percent pro choice" people to continue to portray it as something that is tolerable, but shameful, just perpetuates the reproductive subjugation of women and empowers the anti-choicers.

First-trimester abortion of a fetus happens millions of times a day -- most often, without even the need for any medical prompting. I've had -- despite avid use of contraception -- two miscarriages during partnership with the same man; apparently we were a very fertile combo.

We did not want to be parents. We felt nothing but joy (and 'oh good we can cancel that appt for the abortion") when the bleeding started and I privately flushed away the fetal clumps with a massive sense of relief. Had it not occurred spontaneously, the abortion of both pregnancies would have taken place in a clinic with the same emotional result.

Should someone who needs eye glasses feel shame? Should someone who can't conceive without medical intervention feel shame? Should someone who needs insulin feel shame that her body needs help to improve her life?

There is no reason that a women who needs medical intervention to achieve the same thing that happens naturally hundreds of millions of times per month should feel shame, regret, or anything other than the "dodged a bullet there" flood of relief that millions, if not billions, of women throughout history have felt when a pregnancy was terminated.
J (Manhattan)
The opponents of safe, legal abortion shouldn't have a leg to stand on if they are not even willing to 1) provide resources to prevent pregnancy like birth control, 2) halt abstinence-only education (which leads to some of the highest pregnancy rates in the country), or 3) provide better conditions for foster children not adopted out of the system.

This whole debate seems like a dystopian nightmare: "Well, females, we won't teach you how to prevent pregnancy! We won't provide you with any tools to protect yourself either! But we will force you to carry the pregnancy to term. Because we care about life, you see. The life of a clump of cells in your uterus that won't even be able to survive by itself outside of your body. But wait, we will qualify and say that it is only THAT life that we care about. Not yours. Because you made a mistake when you *chose* to engage in an act that we never taught you how to responsibly approach and failed to utilize the non-existent resources that we refused to provide. Haha, we forgot to mention that once the baby is born, we will cease caring about your baby's life as well. We'll put the baby into for-profit foster systems that don't properly vet foster parents because we can't be bothered to actually do something about the situation. Good luck!"
Kally M. (<br/>)
I ca not "recommend" this post enough.
bounce33 (West Coast)
Oh, and let's add that the male involved in this bears no responsibility.
GM (NYC)
Best post here.
One who is sincere in the belief that abortion is murder would move heaven and earth to ensure that the demand for it is as low as possible by providing as much contraception and sex education as possible. Period. That is reason number 1 that I can assert that what they seek is control over women.
Michelle Bachmann should know that what is "macabre" is forcing women to carry to term sick babies with defects that are incompatible with life, only to watch the baby die an painful death within hours. Such is the insanity of the black and white pro-life crowd.
But black and white insanity is not just pro-life crowd's thing. Even as a feminist who believes women should own their bodies, I'm uncomfortable with the notion that this extends to the power over life and death of a healthy fetus who could live outside the woman's body. I think asserting that the right to end such a life should be the woman's is one reason that the "monster" tag could rightfully be applied to pro-choice advocates. A little recognition of the messiness of this aspect goes a long way.
Anthony N (NY)
Despite the author's assertion, the "issue" of abortion is not "volatile and emotional". What's volatile and emotional are the actions and reactions of anti-choice extremists in response to those who happen to think and act differently than them. They are the ones who harass others, want to interfere in other's personal lives and who commit acts of murder in the name of defending human life.
NR (Washington, DC)
I get social media is trendy, but honestly was their 15 minutes of fame worth this disgusting spectacle?

For the record I do not oppose abortion but count me in the camp that thinks it should absolutely be rare.

If either of these founders was not ready to have a child why didn't they use birth control to ensure that they did not become pregnant?
JustWondering (New York)
Rare is fine. There will a very long road of education, heath services and contraception availability that will eventually make that happen. Unfortunately, there is a group of very loud, very strident and very, very ignorant voices that need a meme that helps demonize women who get abortions. By being open, honest and given the climate, courageous that a woman had an abortion makes it very real. When that previously faceless woman turns out to be your mother, sister, neighbor, co-worker, daughter or friend it's way harder to hate (at least I hope so for most people). Generally, it's way harder to hate when the object of your hate sits across the table from you every single day. In a way it's like gay people coming out. It becomes harder and harder to deny their existence, their sincerity or their need.
Lori (San Francisco)
How do you know they didn't? Birth control is not 100% effective, therefore you cannot "ensure" anything of the kind. My daughter was conceived when I was on birth control.
V (Los Angeles)
My Mother's first autopsy she performed in medical school in Vienna was of a young woman who drank bleach to cause an abortion. The young woman died doing so.

Women will always have abortions, one way or the other. You can't force a woman to bring a fetus to term, as yet.

It's legal for a reason. So, let's increase sex education and the use of contraceptives, and make it rare.
sklund (DC)
"Shout" makes it sound like these women are proud of their abortion. No matter how you feel about when life begins or a woman's right to choose, this is a repugnant way to frame it.

Very poor word choice.
tashmuit (Cape Cahd)
Yes - something like "unshamed and unintimidated" would be better.
Bohemienne (USA)
Nonsense, sklund.

a) Having an abortion is no more "killing another human life" than throwing an acorn on a compost heap = sawing down a giant oak. A clump of fetal tissue is potential life, not actual life. Any more than your ear wax, toenail clippings or other bodily byproducts are a human life. They all are clusters of cells that have specific functions and physical potentialities, and nothing more.

b) On a planet with 7 billion people, most of them sexually active, chances are that several hundred million human pregnancies a month, or more, are aborted naturally with all those clumps being flushed down toilets or thrown out with the trash. All species cull potential members life this; if every fertilized egg came to fruition, Earth would have become a living hell long, long ago. What difference does it make whether the fetus is rejected by the woman's body or by her mind? In both cases a determination has been made that the pregnancy must not continue.

(And for those with religious objections, why did the friend in the sky "design" the human body so that a huge percentage of fertilized eggs are disposed of, if doing so is such a sacrilege?)
Memi (Canada)
@Bohemienne. Love your response. The fiend in the sky was designed by men so they could vilify women in His name. If His word is to be believed, we are unfit even for heaven. Only the Holy Mary Mother of God who didn't have to have sex to bear a child is pure enough. I wish the cherry pickin' Bible thumpers would actually read the book that they claim to live by.
Trippe (Vancouver BC)
These are very brave women. I am so tired of so many men thinking it is up to them to decide on what reproductive rights women should have access to. When the same men practice abstinence, then perhaps they can participate in this discussion but until we reach that time, kindly stay out of women's access to healthcare.
vklip (Pennsylvania)
I find it interesting that people who say they are pro-life have no problem making threats of violence and even death threats to a woman who says she had an abortion.
California Man (West Coast)
And we find it interesting to hear you describe yourself as 'pro choice' when you're really anti-life.

In 2015, there is no excuse for an unwanted pregnancy. None. And people who choose to become pregnant should accept the consequences of their conscious actions.

No excuse.
Randy (Boulder)
I find it even more curious that many pro-lifers abandon all concern for unwanted children the minute they exit the womb.
Ellen (Rome, Italy)
it is interesting that the head of operation rescue is a man and PP a woman. He can do whatever he wants with his body when he gets pregnant....what a joke
Fed Up (USA)
The people who want to deny the right for a woman to have an abortion should be forced to take these unwanted children into their homes and pay every penny it costs to raise them until that child has graduated college.
B (Hawaii)
And should people who have sex without the ability to care and support a child also be taxed? It is always about choices we make and consequences from said choices. Don't have sex if you can't afford the child (or can't take the risk). While access to contraception has never been more available, women do need to learn how to just say no sometimes. A lot of these problems would not happen if they just said no to a guy who wasn't worth the trouble.
California Man (West Coast)
Sad, really sad.

Even if you're prominently anti-life, you're probably humiliated by the fact that you chose to get pregnant and then abort.
sarasotaliz (Sarasota)
Speak for yourself, buddy. When you have an abortion, tell me how you feel.
MGA (NYC)
"Even if you're prominently anti-life, you're probably humiliated by the fact that you chose to get pregnant and then abort."

I didn't CHOOSE to get pregnant - my IUD spontaneously ejected. And, no I am not humiliated either. Have you chosen to have your vasectomy yet?
Clover (Alexandria, VA)
And have you personally taken responsibility for contraception every time you've had sex? Something tells me the answer is no.
Murray Bolesta (Green Valley Az)
Respect women sufficiently to trust them to make the right choice. This issue is all about patriarchy: men's entitlement to dominance and supremacy, with the collusion of many women conditioned since birth to follow it.

All good things will come from the global emancipation of women. That must be our #1 goal.
Jackie (Westchester, NY)
@Murray Bolesta: I agree with everything but your first sentence which you should remove from your otherwise supportive argument and analysis:
Do not say that men/society should "trust women" to make the "right choice" - what is the right choice? I don't need any man's trust or judgment - I need to be left alone to make my own decisions about my own body and my own health care!
JAF (Chicago, IL)
My parents were pregnant with me and unmarried at 16 and 17, respectively. They chose me and marriage, they are still married (40 years) in spite of the odds, and their three daughters are now a Ph.D., MD, and M.A. #ShoutYourLife
Anthony N (NY)
To JAF:

The key word in your comment is "chose". And like your parents, others are also entitled to make their own choices.
jbi (new england)
Umm, so your parents (like mine) had premarital sex without birth control. Do you go around to high schools shouting out the wonders of teen parenthood cause it worked so well for them? I assume there is are reason that none of you emulated them?
Lisa Evers (NYC)
Are you trying to show some kind of cause and effect with 'impressive' educations?
GSK (Brookline, MA)
Many years ago I was living in a country that proclaimed in its constitution "We are a Catholic country". After the birth of my first child I asked my doctor for a contraceptive and, law-abiding citizen that he was, he would not prescribe one. Condoms could not be purchased at a drug store. So when my child was 7 months old, I was pregnant again. It was easier to get an abortion in a doctor's office than it was to get a contraceptive because I could afford one. Then the woman who cleaned my house asked me to lend her money for an abortion. I did that too. Two abortions instead of contraception.
Edwin (Cali)
"On her Facebook page, Ms. Bonow said 'having an abortion made me happy in a totally unqualified way. Why wouldn't I be happy that I was not forced to become a mother?" That is disgusting. Unless she was forced to have the sex, it seems cavalier to find happiness in the ability to avoid the responsibility.
History Major (Whereever)
Not sure where the guy was in your equation. Was he forced? Would he have supported and raised the child without her for 21 years.
Jim S. (Cleveland)
Of course, only men are allowed to have sex without the intention of becoming a parent.
Clover (Alexandria, VA)
Edwin, you don't have a dog in this fight.
NM (NY)
Thinking more, perhaps the voices of those women who were forced into back-alley abortions need to be heard the loudest. With states chipping away at reproductive rights, and Republican Presidential candidates trying to outdo the others' absolute oppositions with certitude about letting pregnant women die, and Mike Huckabee happily denying a 10-year-old rape victim's wish to end her pregnancy, no American can take for granted what losing the right to choice would look like.
A Professor (Queens)
Having been pregnant, I can safely say that it is no picnic--your body is not your own. You have no escape. If you are healthy and have a healthy, safe, wanted pregnancy, it can be a joyous, though deeply exhausting and physically taxing, experience. If not... I can only imagine. Abortion needs to remain legal. Adoption is in no way an equivalent option, though I congratulate women who wish to make that choice.
pjc (Cleveland)
The personal can be the political, but it also can be the private. That is precisely the prerogative of the personal.

The person decides. And if one decides for privacy, that does not necessarily equal silence, or absence of courage. But at the same time, if opts to make public, that too is the prerogative of the personal.

The common theme in both cases must be respect for the right of the person to choose, however they choose.
JAF (Chicago, IL)
You can respect people's right to make a choice, but you don't have to agree with it. And by choose to make private choices public, people choose to engage in debate over their choice.
youngnot (Atlanta, GA)
How about a shout out from all those who were given up for adoption and had a horrible childhood. Many children are placed in disfunctional families and their childhood is not happy. We need to end the fantasy that adoptions are always happy. Those who pride themselves on "doing the right thing" should think again.
Jay Joris (Houston, TX)
Yes. We absolutely do need to end that fantasy. My family was horribly dysfunctional. My father did not want to marry my mother, but did so to avoid being drafted. I may have possibly been adopted for the same reason.
l (chicago)
"Jessica Blankenship, a New York editor with a 3-year-old son tweeted that not becoming a mother at 20 had allowed her to become the kind of mother she is now proud to be."

Should women like Jessica be ashamed or silent about their decision to control their bodies and subsequently their lives?

States like Texas are creating new laws, for example requiring clinics to meet the requirements for Ambulatory Surgical Centers, that significantly restrict access to abortion, birth control, and reproductive health with growing support from the public.

These kinds of social media displays are way of sticking up for oneself.
RP Smith (Marshfield, MA)
My desire to get on Facebook or Twitter just went lower, if that's possible.
NM (NY)
While I respect women speaking up as examples of what the right to choice means, I'm dismayed that a basic medical procedure even has to be dignified. Would anyone be compelled to shout out their appendectomy or tonsillitis?
NM (NY)
I meant "tonsillectomy," not "tonsillitis." Sorry for the typo.
LK (New York, N.Y.)
They might if appendectomy or tonsillectomy clinics were being bombed and the doctors murdered, or if the clinics were being legislated away by conservative politicians. And if those who had undergone a procedure were stigmatized, shamed, and/or harassed.
Joan (St. Paul)
Maybe if there were people who wanted to make appendectomies or tonsillectomies illegal, then there would/should be shouts about that also. It is about not having "others" decide what is right or wrong for someone else. Imposing our values/morality on others makes no sense.
The Other Sophie (NYC)
Charming. People who claim to be "pro-life" making death threats. Because, you know, life!
NYB (GA)
I think those who make threats are consistent with the position of being pro-life, since over 99% of the time they're far too cowardly to actually carry out their threat.
MSL, NY (New York)
As Barney Frank said, the anti-abortion people believe that life begins at conception and ends at birth.
Sandra Garratt (Palm Springs, California)
They not only make death threats but they actually murder people in cold blood…..all in the name of protecting life. Strange but true.
Brenda (Morris Plains)
At the time of the Framing, many Americans defended slavery as an unfortunate necessity, which would, over time, become extinct. But as they years went by, slaveowners changed their narrative, their rhetoric now asserting that slavery was an affirmative good, benefiting both master and slave.

Now, we have the pro-aborts, claiming that abortion is not a failure, a tragedy to be mourned, perhaps as an unfortunately necessity, but something about which one should brag. This is sick.

It’s wrong to “carry some residual shame” about taking a child’s life? It makes one “happy in a totally unqualified way”? Yikes. (Although the woman was right; she’s clearly unqualified for motherhood.) Having a “late term abortion” is something about which someone should not even be “embarrassed”? Of what SHOULD one be embarrassed?

So, she never regretted her decision “not to become a teenage Mom”? Pity she didn’t think about that before taking the action which often produces teenage pregnancies.

It must be comforting for the advocates to realize that there is historic precedent for their actions. Roe channels Dred Scott and “shout your abortion” channels The Charleston Mercury and John C. Calhoun.
Zejee (New York)
A late term abortion is almost always done for medical reasons. Sadness -- not embarrassment -- is the usual feeling. Stop shaking your finger and try compassion.
Sophia (chicago)
Oh please.

Your analogy is absurd for this very obvious reason: forcing women to bear children IS slavery.
swm (providence)
My ability to feel one way or another about this is clouded by how unsafe a space social media is. Thoughtful discourse does not happen on Twitter, and I wouldn't invite others to it nor share my personal experiences on it.

I can't stand the cruelty that's burgeoning on social media. Even reading a personal attack (against anyone) makes me very sad and literally hurts, and in light of the constant rageful actions of people who are not adjusted to a society in which not everyone shares the same views, it scares me. I wish people were just civil, but I have no idea how that will ever happen.
doug (Seattle, WA)
Thanks for this!
George (Monterey)
Woman who are responsible and understand they cannot properly care for a child at that point in their lives for whatever reason should be seen as being smart, honest and doing what's right for their lives, despite the pain of their decision. There is no reason for shame.
mn (nyc)
As a doctor in training who has witnessed multiple abortions, I can't say I agree with you. I have seen gunshot wounds, infections, faces sliced open, men attacked with sledge hammers; you name it, none of it ever got to me. But watching a 20-week old fetus (ssen moving on ultrasound simultaneously) ripped literally limb from limb and tossed into a bucket, I passed out. It wasn't the blood or tiny dismembered limbs. It was witnessing the killing of another human being. I have no axe to grind...But until everyone has actually seen what it's like up close (that does NOT include anaesthetized patients, btw), all the rhetoric is hot air. How could ny rational person not feel some degree of shame for their responsibility in causing another human life to meet that end? I can fully accept that there are times when it's appropriate, that it's the mother's decision, and that outlawing it leads to far worse and horrific consequences. It's a necessary evil. But it's absolutely nothing to celebrate or "shout". The pro-choice movement would do well to acknowledge that abortion is an ugly, messy and completely avoidable procedure. Everyone on both sides of this issue should be fighting tooth and nail to prevent every single abortion from becoming necessary, and acknowledging that every abortion is on some level the cleanup of a failure. People are usually ashamed of their failures, and without taking that shame to the extreme, I think it's appropriate.
George (Monterey)
Doctor MN, these are the facts and the numbers from the CDC. 1.2% of abortions are done after 20 weeks. I'm guessing 99% of those are to save the life of the mother.

"In 2011, an estimated 1.1 million abortions were
performed, a 13 percent decline from 2008. The
abortion rate in 2011 was the lowest rate since 1973
(Jones and Jerman, 2014). The U.S. Centers for
Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates
that 66 percent of legal abortions occur within
the first eight weeks of gestation, and 92 percent
are performed within the first 13 weeks. Only 1.2
percent occur at or after 21 weeks (CDC, 2013)."
A. Conley (57747)
No matter the noise made in defense of women actively planning and living their own destinies, GOP women (and their patriarchs) will make a greater noise. Once we make a personal choice, we move on; they stay stuck. It's a big part of their volume. We'll never top it.

We have to win at the ballot box.
Mary (Hamden, CT)
"It has been very rare for women to come out in public about an abortion." There's a very good reason for that. Anyone with a shred of intelligence knows in their heart (whether they want it to be legal or not) abortion is the killing of another human life. No matter what the reason it was done, that's just not something to be proud of.
jbi (new england)
I think it's about time for people to be ashamed of their desire to force girls and women to continue unwanted pregnancies and bear children AGAINST THEIR WILL. This isn't "pro-life," it's disgusting.
Taj (Common Sense Land)
About 2/3 of fertilized eggs don't adhere to the uterine wall and are naturally aborted. Guess all women are murderers!
Eugene Mosier (Barcelona)
I have much more than a shred of intelligence and I know in my heart that you are presentIng your emotional opinion as fact. You are entitled to your beliefs but it is arrogant in the extreme to imply that those who disagree with you are not intelligent.
SKM (geneseo)
This article is so terribly sad in many ways. Thank you for the fair assessment.
Michael Hoffman (Pacific Northwest)
Announcing the abortion of one’s child: #shoutyourabortion. This is done mostly by “human rights” types oblivious to violence in the womb.

It is reported that the founder of this movement to “shout your abortion" is in hiding. I would like to know where unborn babies can hide from abortion?

Violence is epidemic in America in part because violence in the womb is too. Unborn babies are human beings. Killing them dehumanizes us all.
C's Daughter (NYC)
You keep talking about "the womb" as if it is some abstract, morally and legally neutral location, like Arkansas, or maybe the middle east. You do this so that you can ignore the fact that you're actually talking about a woman's body.

Guess what, man. There is no such place called "the womb" that society has rights and jurisdiction over. I have a uterus in my body. Most women have one. It's in my body. You have no ability to regulate what happens in it.
Trippe (Vancouver BC)
Women access safe abortion in many countries in the world where the violence found in the US doesn't exist so please don't tie the two issues together.
Cantor43 (Brooklyn)
@Michael Hoffman. "Unborn babies are human beings. Killing them dehumanizes us all."

Wrong. Unborn babies are potentially human beings. A woman IS a human being, and forcing her to carry an unwanted pregnancy to term dehumanizes HER.
Voiceofamerica (United States)
The government should pay a reward to every woman who has an abortion and tax every birth.

If we fail to radically reduce the population, we will not survive.
Concerned Reader (Boston)
The US does not have an overpopulation problem. It does however have a Social Security funding problem. Cut down the newborns who would eventually enter the workforce, and you can say bye bye to future Social Security benefits.
Abelle (Portland, OR)
That why we need immigrants not more children
Bohemienne (USA)
Concerned: Immigration will take care of SS and Medicare for as long as this nation exists. We don't need to encourage the production of domestically grown humans to ensure that those who have paid in for decades are not shorted in their old age.
hankfromthebank (florida)
My father wanted my mother to get an abortion when she was pregnant with me. She refused and divorced my dad instead. so.. I would like to give her a shout out.
eve (san francisco)
She had a choice and she made it. That's what this is about.
Rebecca (Lawrence, Kansas)
If your mom had had the abortion, you wouldn't be aware of it.

My son's dad wanted me to have an abortion when I was pregnant. I refused. Now he (my son) is 30 years old, mentally ill, miserable, and attempted suicide last month. Maybe he would be wishing he'd been aborted - if I'd been unkind enough to tell him his father said that.

So, what is the point of our two stories? Anything?
Randy (Boulder)
And yet that still doesn't mean that women should be forced to keep unwanted pregnancies.