I just finished 35 years of teaching special education and this article made me cry, like I usually cried, regularly; at least once a week. After my student teaching in a special ed classroom where teachers were also among the abused and bullies reigned, I redoubled my resolve to teach and lasted for a long, long time. I am proud of my service, as early on I saw that no matter the learning issues, that students would one day be segregated by their violent behavior, which is what has happened. As in all other areas of our culture, violence is much, much more common than when I was young, and violent behavior is almost impossible to deal with in current schools. When a student bites a hole in your hand, or hits you full on with a chair, or bloodies another child's face, the shock and upsetness is palpable in the room and lasts for a bit. Parents become involved in the fight. In my last position I was working in an integrated preschool.. I had to have two students, aged 4 removed from the setting to a more restrictive setting. They were being abused at home. Other parents were angry too and removing their children, teachers were chastised and then trained, experts were called in. It became safer for everyone when they were moved. Never a day goes by that I don't think of those 2 kids. It's hard to learn when you are young that your choices are what makes the difference, but sometimes life seems not fair.
32
Aside from the fact that you are now writing first person pieces for the NYT, how did you get out of High School if you never cracked a book? Which now leads to your college experience? or what that got you from there to here?
9
Frankly I think that anyone who achieves a semblance of "normal" life (regular paycheck, home, family) - is amazing.
We grow up with so many rules and expectations the head is filled with noise. Maybe under certain circumstances anger is the logical reaction. But it's treated as a complete aberration, and a person can be marked for life.
We grow up with so many rules and expectations the head is filled with noise. Maybe under certain circumstances anger is the logical reaction. But it's treated as a complete aberration, and a person can be marked for life.
12
As a special educator with 28 years of teaching in public and private schools, I have to state that public special education is in a very difficult position. We have to educate all children without regard to their disability or severity there in. We have pressure from the parents of children with complex needs to be fair and equitable. We also have pressure to maintain somewhat of a normalized and distraction-free environment. That being said , the challenge is immense. Prior to to 1972, kids with special needs would have probably just stayed home. So I leave it all of you to determine whether or not we have made progress. Prior to 1972, there was little responsibility taken for special kids and nobody was willing to pay for the little yellow bus.
36
SPECIAL EDUCATION is often less special than the experiences of the writer would suggest. Having consulted in special ed classrooms for many years, i found them well-organized, quiet and focused on schoolwork. But those years were after the 70s, when the ideas of "open" education were accepted and the ethos of letting it "all hang out" was the order of the day.
I appreciate the writer's observation that his perception of his experiences is affected by his mood when he reflects no those years.
That's life. Good things happen. Bad things happen. And things that are partly good and partly bad happen also. What defines the experience is what you remember about it. And your mood at the time.
I appreciate the writer's observation that his perception of his experiences is affected by his mood when he reflects no those years.
That's life. Good things happen. Bad things happen. And things that are partly good and partly bad happen also. What defines the experience is what you remember about it. And your mood at the time.
6
He was in a classroom for violent/feral kids yet doesn't really say what he did to merit that placement. Not forgiving the school for not defending him when he was on the receiving end of a punch...how many did he throw himself at Darrel or someone else? He thinks the school is guilty of something? Really. Not teaching him enough? Just how fractious was he? How much time did he spend in time out?.Hard to learn anything if you're beating people up all the time. But that's not the school's fault. If anything they should be given a medal for trying to intervene.
I was a teacher's aide in one of these classrooms and the only thing you can do is try to help them understand the consequences of their behavior and invent elaborate reward programs for not acting out. Some get it and some don't. Looks like this guy did... so what exactly is he whining about? Maybe he could come up with a better answer instead of sitting around wondering whether his life was ruined.
I was a teacher's aide in one of these classrooms and the only thing you can do is try to help them understand the consequences of their behavior and invent elaborate reward programs for not acting out. Some get it and some don't. Looks like this guy did... so what exactly is he whining about? Maybe he could come up with a better answer instead of sitting around wondering whether his life was ruined.
12
I'm surprised at the number of commenters here put the fate a "different" child solely on parent's shoulders. When educators themselves haven't the faintest idea what they are doing, the parents are? If everyone is stumbling in the dark, why is it just the parent's fault?
In this instance, the bit about tears from kindness shows this child not only had clueless parents, but were emotionally absent themselves to this child. Is it then this child's stupidity for having chosen such incapable parents?
That so much for this person comes down to one day, and what made the difference is only what most consider ordinary decency, is this asking too much of schools, teachers, education systems?
No.
Instead, whoever we are, we're pointing fingers elsewhere rather than risking a hug and our own empathy to shed a tear on the part of someone else.
Shame on us all.
In this instance, the bit about tears from kindness shows this child not only had clueless parents, but were emotionally absent themselves to this child. Is it then this child's stupidity for having chosen such incapable parents?
That so much for this person comes down to one day, and what made the difference is only what most consider ordinary decency, is this asking too much of schools, teachers, education systems?
No.
Instead, whoever we are, we're pointing fingers elsewhere rather than risking a hug and our own empathy to shed a tear on the part of someone else.
Shame on us all.
35
Maybe just surviving various types of "special education" programs is the best medicine of all. Not "life and death" surviving, but "still got my head screwed on reasonably straight after all these years" surviving. Good for you, Josh. Great piece.
20
I am most impressed Josh. Good for you and good for those special teachers. I had those same teachers.
I assume you are a white guy. If you were black or brown and behaved this way, you would have had another experience. It is called "expulsion".
I assume you are a white guy. If you were black or brown and behaved this way, you would have had another experience. It is called "expulsion".
17
That's just wrong. They can't even flunk a child of color or discipline them as the law suits fly no matter if the child needs the reprimand. It's exactly what is wrong with the minority kids right now and they know they have the upper hand.
7
A very telling story; thank you for sharing it.
After sustaining a near fatal traumatic brain injury in a car wreck ('90) which rendered me comatose for 22-days, just several months shy of turning 20, I've spent nearly the last 24-years advocating for and protecting the rights of individuals with disabilities of all ages.
While my expertise lies in determining the physical accessibility of buildings and facilities for individuals with mobility impairments, I have attended and advocated on behalf of many students with disabilities receive the same opportunity for education as those students who do not have a disability as mandated under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act of 1975, as amended.
Attitude remains the biggest barrier.
After sustaining a near fatal traumatic brain injury in a car wreck ('90) which rendered me comatose for 22-days, just several months shy of turning 20, I've spent nearly the last 24-years advocating for and protecting the rights of individuals with disabilities of all ages.
While my expertise lies in determining the physical accessibility of buildings and facilities for individuals with mobility impairments, I have attended and advocated on behalf of many students with disabilities receive the same opportunity for education as those students who do not have a disability as mandated under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act of 1975, as amended.
Attitude remains the biggest barrier.
13
I cried as you both cried. If everyone could remember that kindness extended transforms a life otherwise challenged, and model that to the world, many lives would be changed as yours was. Thank you for sharing.
17
thanks, Josh...
5
We all have problems. Get over it.
Until you have lived this life as a student, parent or teacher, please refrain from derogations such as yours. There is a particular combination of factors that must be diagnosed and remedied before children will succeed. Thank goodness Josh found some answers but for all of the other Joshs out there, we all still have much to learn.
29
The article shares special ed experiences and the problems encountered on the part of the student but what is the solution? On analysis is that Josh outgrew his issues an put back in standard class rooms where he was treated much better.
The environment Josh experienced in the special education is clearly unacceptable but what is the solution short of having an adult monitor for every child? Perhaps it would have been better to have Josh in the regular classes all along in spite of the price those students would have paid.
John
The environment Josh experienced in the special education is clearly unacceptable but what is the solution short of having an adult monitor for every child? Perhaps it would have been better to have Josh in the regular classes all along in spite of the price those students would have paid.
John
1
Thank you for reading, and for your comments. JM
17
The paragons of classroom decorum are girls. They set the standard. ADHD means "Doesn't behave like a nice girl."
On average, girls learn linguistic and social arts faster; boys are more boisterous.
Why doesn't little Tom, Dick or Harry behave like a good girl? --often has the obvious answer.
Special Ed could simply recognize the (on average) differences and respond accordingly--teach teachers to deal with snakes, snails and tails, as well as sugar, spice and nice.
Our daughter (BSc Math and CompSci) seemed to be born middle aged--little sympathy for the follies of her peers. Our son (six years younger--now in Med School) regularly got me called to decorum meetings--under the threat of suspension for exactly those follies.
On average, girls learn linguistic and social arts faster; boys are more boisterous.
Why doesn't little Tom, Dick or Harry behave like a good girl? --often has the obvious answer.
Special Ed could simply recognize the (on average) differences and respond accordingly--teach teachers to deal with snakes, snails and tails, as well as sugar, spice and nice.
Our daughter (BSc Math and CompSci) seemed to be born middle aged--little sympathy for the follies of her peers. Our son (six years younger--now in Med School) regularly got me called to decorum meetings--under the threat of suspension for exactly those follies.
10
On district I taught in practiced the 'screw-ups and behavioral problem kids must be in special ed' practice. I had a class of 15, with just two girls. Most of the kids I had were not SPED, but behavioral problems. I had one kid, a huge kid who would attack someone for looking at him 'funny.' (Turns he had a chemical imbalance problem.) I had to physically restrain him more than once. (We could do that in SpEd classes.) I had one kid who had the mouth of a truck driving Marine. My truly most special ed kid was a gentle soul who was just struggling to get through the day. He was a very sweet boy.
Special Ed is not the answer to all problems. This district was so backwards that they even placed immigrant kids who could not speak English in SpEd classes. What century were they from?
Special Ed is not the answer to all problems. This district was so backwards that they even placed immigrant kids who could not speak English in SpEd classes. What century were they from?
15
Thank you for sharing your story, Josh. What resonated for me was what a difference music made in your life. I run a charity that provides scholarships for low income kids who want to attend any rock music school in the USA, and a lot of them are struggling with issues - parents who are ill, incarcerated, working multiple jobs but still unable to provide music for their child. One of our partner schools posted a plea on FB recently, saying that a social worked had brought a 12 year old girl to their school. She recently lost her father to cancer, and her mom was struggling to raise five children. The girl was very depressed, and music was the only thing that lifted her spirits. The community rallied when they saw that post, and money for her scholarship flowed in, as did a brand new guitar, cable, strap and amp from Schecter. Music changes lives, and we have many similar heartwarming stories. I would love to talk to you, but I didn't see a way to email you directly.
22
Beautiful story. I wonder about the "Joshes" who were specially educated and didn't fare quite as well.
9
Special Ed aides...the unsung hero's of American public education.
27
I am so thankful you wrote this IMPORTANT article. I am a special education teacher for K-3rd grade. I have a combination of academics & extreme behavior needs. I am constantly torn between how to manage the variety of needs I am faced with each day & year. I think so many times we teach seclusion rather than understanding, but I believe this is a topic that very much needs to be discussed & changes made.
19
I wish I had been your SPED Teacher has you would never have been like that or treated like that---as you would have faced consequences not written off by a mis-diagnosed Labeling excuse!!!!!!!!!!
My consequences would have consisted or reading an extra 3 chapter with a report and a reminder that IF YOU WANT RESPEC YOU FIRST HAVE TO GIVE IT-----and NO Sugar to help escalate your behavioral Attitude!
My consequences would have consisted or reading an extra 3 chapter with a report and a reminder that IF YOU WANT RESPEC YOU FIRST HAVE TO GIVE IT-----and NO Sugar to help escalate your behavioral Attitude!
3
Be careful about writing off the "cookie cutter mob." We have deep ambivalence about our pasts, and we experience haunting and soul-levelling emotions, too.
13
Hi,
Just found out today that back in June of this year one of my role models, one of my heros, educator Marva Collin died [I must of not read the paper that week].
On the subject of special education Mrs. Collins said" I have discovered few learning disabled students in my three decades of teaching. I have, however, discovered many, many victims of teaching inabilities."
To find out who Marva Collins was read her NY Times Obituary:"Marva Collins, Educator Who Aimed High for Poor, Black Students, Dies at 78" By SAM ROBERTSJUNE 28, 2015 .
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/06/29/us/marva-collins-78-no-nonsense-educat...
To see what see should go on with special education students and all other students watch the YouTube Videos
Marva Collins 1995 Part 1 :.https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=marva+collins+60+minutes
Marva Collins 1995 Part 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmW_Qu3yhjA
Thank you Marva Collins. Bless you and everyone like you.
Just found out today that back in June of this year one of my role models, one of my heros, educator Marva Collin died [I must of not read the paper that week].
On the subject of special education Mrs. Collins said" I have discovered few learning disabled students in my three decades of teaching. I have, however, discovered many, many victims of teaching inabilities."
To find out who Marva Collins was read her NY Times Obituary:"Marva Collins, Educator Who Aimed High for Poor, Black Students, Dies at 78" By SAM ROBERTSJUNE 28, 2015 .
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/06/29/us/marva-collins-78-no-nonsense-educat...
To see what see should go on with special education students and all other students watch the YouTube Videos
Marva Collins 1995 Part 1 :.https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=marva+collins+60+minutes
Marva Collins 1995 Part 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmW_Qu3yhjA
Thank you Marva Collins. Bless you and everyone like you.
7
“Spare the rod, spoil the child.”
While this piece by Josh Max is his own personal journey through “special ed”, I was struck by how behavior modifications he couldn’t make while in “regular” school were suddenly achievable when faced with actual violence and the prospect of abuse from his fellow students.
So, while we can go on an on – and rightly so in most instances – about the need for better diagnosis of behavioral issues in our children, getting special needs students additional resources and the use of pharmacology such as Ritalin to help children with ADHD, it also stands to reason that there are any number of children out there who may need nothing more than the threat or actual use of judicious corporeal punishment to keep them on the right track. Discipline, unfortunately, in some instance has to be harshly handed out.
Yet, today the sparing use of the rod or ruler that proved effect over millennia in educating our children is now not only frowned upon, but usually is considered a crime. Some, including me, would correlate the restrictions on using corporeal punishment in schools as explaining a number of children who are now “special ed” as the means of last resort for teachers to contain disruptive behavior. Our schools and children are suffering for our “enlightened” methods.
While this piece by Josh Max is his own personal journey through “special ed”, I was struck by how behavior modifications he couldn’t make while in “regular” school were suddenly achievable when faced with actual violence and the prospect of abuse from his fellow students.
So, while we can go on an on – and rightly so in most instances – about the need for better diagnosis of behavioral issues in our children, getting special needs students additional resources and the use of pharmacology such as Ritalin to help children with ADHD, it also stands to reason that there are any number of children out there who may need nothing more than the threat or actual use of judicious corporeal punishment to keep them on the right track. Discipline, unfortunately, in some instance has to be harshly handed out.
Yet, today the sparing use of the rod or ruler that proved effect over millennia in educating our children is now not only frowned upon, but usually is considered a crime. Some, including me, would correlate the restrictions on using corporeal punishment in schools as explaining a number of children who are now “special ed” as the means of last resort for teachers to contain disruptive behavior. Our schools and children are suffering for our “enlightened” methods.
1
Josh, you are no different than the rest of us who did not attend special ed. You made me cry, too. Thank you.
5
Great piece of writing, Josh...from one special ed. kid to another.
4
"Time wounds all heels." This quote has been attributed to Groucho Marx, among others. It doesn't matter whether you are mentally ill, developmentally challenged, or just a plain bully. If you treat other people badly, sooner or later the chickens will come home to roost.
4
Josh,
Man....Have you ever read Torey L Hayden? http://www.torey-hayden.com
She is s special ed teacher from your era or perhaps a tad before. She was thrown in the way you were, and found her calling. As a preschool teacher, I find it an amazing duty to help kids whose feelings overwhelm to find their way. I am glad you did.
Man....Have you ever read Torey L Hayden? http://www.torey-hayden.com
She is s special ed teacher from your era or perhaps a tad before. She was thrown in the way you were, and found her calling. As a preschool teacher, I find it an amazing duty to help kids whose feelings overwhelm to find their way. I am glad you did.
5
Josh, you should not have been in special ed. You were placed there anyway, and that kind of thing is still done today. You made the best of everything and all is well. I hope others are able to find their genius as you did. Thank you! Best TED talk ever. Enjoy! http://www.ted.com/talks/ken_robinson_says_schools_kill_creativity?langu...
3
One of the best columns I've read on education in a long, long time. Thank you John. Whatever it was, you've made it into a gift.
4
Thanks for sharing. This was so very powerful. All the best....
3
Dear Josh, what a story and so well told. A tough beginning—no doubt about that—but you have come through it able to move people with words. A big price to pay for a wonderful skill. Thank you.
9
Josh, I sit here wiping tears. You are gifted in your writing, you have the ability to tell a heartfelt story and you are a musician. You are talented and have found your way to a better life. Keep the spirit.
16
Josh, sounds to me like it was more where you were than who you were. You tried to adapt in the midst of mayhem and your survival is testimony to your survival skills and intelligence.
You may not have knwn New Jersey on a map, but God gave you intelligence, the ability to write and play music. You finally landed in a place where you could survive and thrive. Amazing what a little love in our lives will do.
You were prescient too. Otherwise, why would you have been smiling in your baby pictures. You were destined to be happy. You made it!
You may not have knwn New Jersey on a map, but God gave you intelligence, the ability to write and play music. You finally landed in a place where you could survive and thrive. Amazing what a little love in our lives will do.
You were prescient too. Otherwise, why would you have been smiling in your baby pictures. You were destined to be happy. You made it!
10
So whats the message you want to promote - Mad Max?
that special ed creates more problems than it solves for both the special and general population of students?
SE serves a need!
given the wide range of possible physical and emotional differences from the general population, will the cure suit each individual given the difficult diagnostic process early in life to determine causation ? probably not
so is this a backdoor propaganda mime to make public education appear to be the problem .....and not you?
that special ed creates more problems than it solves for both the special and general population of students?
SE serves a need!
given the wide range of possible physical and emotional differences from the general population, will the cure suit each individual given the difficult diagnostic process early in life to determine causation ? probably not
so is this a backdoor propaganda mime to make public education appear to be the problem .....and not you?
3
Part of making sure my own child feels supported and safe is making sure that she is not abused (and that includes abuse by other children that I know are extremely violent or sex predators). I don't know if special ed helped you but it did help the other children in the school system avoid the trauma of getting hit with chairs, thrown our windows, and molested in the restroom. I'm looking at my 5 year old daughter right now and I will honestly say that I would not sacrifice her to save a child like you. I would try to help you but not at the expense of my own daughter. That was already put to the test and I stood up for my daughter's safety and well being. Unfortunately that violent child was just shifted to another class where his actions caused a 4 year old to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
31
In an age where a teacher's performance is minutely scrutinized, both by multi-page "rubrics" (checklists of everything that a teacher can possibly do wrong during a 15-minute observation or casual "walk-through" by an unannounced administrator)) and standardized test scores, you can expect more and more teachers to have less and less patience with students who will "bring down their stats." The current mania of tying a teacher's performance rating, thereby threatening a teacher's job based student's test scores, warps the relationship between teachers and students. Students whose special needs detract from the test-prep directives "from above" can expect to feel more unwelcome than ever.
1
What a moving piece - thank you for sharing.
5
Interesting. Hope you keep smiling.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4YbFzfIjGX0
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4YbFzfIjGX0
Dear Josh,
I am just amazed by the story you have told. And sad. And heartened. If you are as talented a musician as you are a writer, your music must be wonderful. I hope to hear it. Betsy
I am just amazed by the story you have told. And sad. And heartened. If you are as talented a musician as you are a writer, your music must be wonderful. I hope to hear it. Betsy
3
Right on, Josh. Music.
3
Josh, I am sure there are many people in the world that have had similar feelings, fears and experiences. Thanks for sharing yours.
Some human beings don't seem to know how to treat people that they think are "different". (It has always been that way.)
The good news is, God loves us all - - - He loves EVERY ONE of us. He knows exactly how we feel. (And, by the way, we are ALL "different" in some unique way.)
To you, and EVERY person on Earth, I say, God values you just as much as He values any other human being. I hope that knowledge helps encourage and comfort you throughout your life. (Those of us who are Christian often have only ONE true friend, and that friend is our Lord Jesus Christ (He is God the Son).
God's grace is sufficient for all His children.
Some human beings don't seem to know how to treat people that they think are "different". (It has always been that way.)
The good news is, God loves us all - - - He loves EVERY ONE of us. He knows exactly how we feel. (And, by the way, we are ALL "different" in some unique way.)
To you, and EVERY person on Earth, I say, God values you just as much as He values any other human being. I hope that knowledge helps encourage and comfort you throughout your life. (Those of us who are Christian often have only ONE true friend, and that friend is our Lord Jesus Christ (He is God the Son).
God's grace is sufficient for all His children.
This is an excellent article pointing to..yes that "volcano in the belly" named else where as the "Solar Plexus" that that location in all three bodies of a Human BE-ing where our etheric vitality is taken in and distributed. Unfortunately, if emotions get out of control ...all Hell breaks lose .....when understood properly ...great creativity arrises.......Thanks Max!! it looks like your karmic destiny put you or the right school bus and delivered you to knowing teachers and friends.
2
It hurt you Josh. Now fight back. Tyler Durden lives.
2
Thank you. I needed that story tonight. Bless you for your honesty.
3
More writing like this, please, in the NYT! Thank you, Mr. Max.
3
Delightful. You have clarity and acceptance in your narrative.
2
At a rough guess here, Josh, I'd say the problem lay somewhere in the direction of utterly AWOL parents...
And that those three rather--uh--challenging years were uniquely valuable as a microcosm of the real world awaiting in adulthood.
Most people who live the creative life got there via Pain Highway. It's what you do with what happened along the way that matters. Clearly you ended up at a worthwhile destination. Let the doubts go.
And that those three rather--uh--challenging years were uniquely valuable as a microcosm of the real world awaiting in adulthood.
Most people who live the creative life got there via Pain Highway. It's what you do with what happened along the way that matters. Clearly you ended up at a worthwhile destination. Let the doubts go.
4
So glad you found your way. From what you describe it sounds as though two things especially hurt you. No communication between the school and your parents or your parents with you. You make is sound like you never knew what school you were going to and the school never spoke to your parents. Sad but it may have made you a better person?
6
Beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
3
Thank you for sharing.
1
It hurt you.
Wow!
Thank you for the amazing story. I am just so speechless. You have so much to say. Thank you for sharing this with me.
Thank you for the amazing story. I am just so speechless. You have so much to say. Thank you for sharing this with me.
2
It's seldom you read a column so full of life and truth that you could easily make a movie from it. Are you listening, Richard Linklater? (Call it 'Super Max'.)
2
"The question of whether my schooling hurt me or helped me has haunted me my whole life."
I never walked in your shoes. So I would never criticize you for what haunts you. I know that some people do seem destined to carry the baggage of their youth to their graves.
But I know that a lot of people who had much less to overcome in life seem to have chosen to be "haunted" by what happened to them as they were growing up.
The best thing I can say is to watch Tim Minchin gives his nine "life lessons" and try to move on as best you can:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5RBG1PadWI
I never walked in your shoes. So I would never criticize you for what haunts you. I know that some people do seem destined to carry the baggage of their youth to their graves.
But I know that a lot of people who had much less to overcome in life seem to have chosen to be "haunted" by what happened to them as they were growing up.
The best thing I can say is to watch Tim Minchin gives his nine "life lessons" and try to move on as best you can:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5RBG1PadWI
1
my heart goes out to you...What good fortune that you turned out as well as you did...could have been the negative and mean side which prevailed...i wish you joy and comfort in your life...you have survived a most horrific childhood. had i been there i would have gladly been your friend and would most certainly have slipped you part of my lunch , as well.my very best wishes to you....
2
Whaaa?
Obviously a fiction piece. I’m 66 y/o and had ADHD to the point that I could never sit down at my desk from Kindergarten through sixth grade. And even though I was girl I got in physical fights every day with both boys AND girls.
I wasn’t put in Special Ed. These were the 1900s not the 1600s. Our small town family doc had solid wisdom and common sense. Even 60 years ago there was a marked difference between behavior disorders and decreased intelligence potential.
This story makes absolutely no sense.
Obviously a fiction piece. I’m 66 y/o and had ADHD to the point that I could never sit down at my desk from Kindergarten through sixth grade. And even though I was girl I got in physical fights every day with both boys AND girls.
I wasn’t put in Special Ed. These were the 1900s not the 1600s. Our small town family doc had solid wisdom and common sense. Even 60 years ago there was a marked difference between behavior disorders and decreased intelligence potential.
This story makes absolutely no sense.
Thank you, Josh, for this great story! A naturally sunny disposition is a gift which rarely gets recognized as the blessing that it is!
3
Thank you. I loved this piece.
2
Way too much irrelevant retrospection. If this past is your definition of personal trauma in childhood,then every adult on the planet has been traumatized. What is the point of all of these trivial narratives of distant emotional pain? Why is it relevant to anyone other than the author?
If it is solely a creative writing project.,find a bigger trauma.Way bigger. (Scoliosis and 6 years in and out of casts,spina bifida,glioblastoma,sickle cell crises , child abuse,addicted parents, lousy schools because of "demographics", deafness, the list of physical disabilities and social trauma is endless. ) Riding "the short bus" doesn't even register . Except to you.
If it is solely a creative writing project.,find a bigger trauma.Way bigger. (Scoliosis and 6 years in and out of casts,spina bifida,glioblastoma,sickle cell crises , child abuse,addicted parents, lousy schools because of "demographics", deafness, the list of physical disabilities and social trauma is endless. ) Riding "the short bus" doesn't even register . Except to you.
Love is the answer-always has been, always will be. That's what the teacher who took you out in the hall showed you.
3
Great story, and thank you for sharing it.
2
Children are mean. This is not news.
Wow, Josh, thank you for this.
2
Josh-
That was truly beautiful. I never wondered what it would be like to be thought of as "slow". Children are incredibly mean. I honestly don't know how as many people survive childhood as we do. But we do, and you are living proof. Thank you for your piece. You are truly remarkable!
That was truly beautiful. I never wondered what it would be like to be thought of as "slow". Children are incredibly mean. I honestly don't know how as many people survive childhood as we do. But we do, and you are living proof. Thank you for your piece. You are truly remarkable!
3
Good for you, dude. Big time. You made it.
3
josh, what an extraordinary writer you are. thank you for reminding me that moments of grace can lead to self acceptance and love. the question is no longer important once you know who you are.
2
Beautiful, thank you.
2
It would be pretentiously for anybody else to say whether it helped or hurt you, yet it feels alive after how many years.
And what comes through in your telling of the story is emotive and inspiring — it is indeed 'special' — thank you for sharing.
And what comes through in your telling of the story is emotive and inspiring — it is indeed 'special' — thank you for sharing.
3
My brother, who has what today is understood as Asperger's, suffered through special ed shunting in the Dark Ages of the 1970's as well. I'm immensely grateful that we've come a long way since then, and my son with Asperger's is having a completely different and better experience with school. We still occasionally meet an "education professional" who is behind the times, but that's the exception rather than the rule.
4
No question in my mind that special ed (at least as it was implemented from about 2003 through about 2010 in the suburban Boston area) brings both benefits and damage to students and their families.
1
Similar symptoms here, though I was stuck in catholic school where I was beaten and humiliated by the nuns. I tried to tell my parents how I was treated, but that only got me in trouble at home. The anger inside me and my friends exploded as we became teens, violence toward others, vandalism, self destructive drug and alcohol abuse. No one ever tried to help. My son also has similar issues, but he was put into early intervention, he had a team of people, including his parents, helping him. While I wanted to commit suicide at 18, he is thriving—working, going to college full time, staying out of trouble. It's a much better world today, despite what you hear.
61
I'm also a survivor of Catholic parochial schools. Granted that nuns are probably the only ones these days continuing the message of Christ, it's also the case that a select few of them have received a pass on the physical (and psychological) abuse they inflicted on their students during the '50s and '60s. In my school, a boy looking cross-eyed at our eight grade teacher or as girl saying something loosely interpreted as insolent would merit a series of very hard slaps across the face.
Bravo, Josh Max, on a fearless and beautifully written essay.
8
My goodness, what a brilliant article.
8
Brilliant and exceptional. Take up writing as well as music.
8
This is a fantastic little essay. Thanks, Josh.
7
I love this.
4
I have so many questions after reading this beautifully written piece, so many 'but hows?' and 'whys?' and 'whats?' but by the end, I know they don't matter. The painful yet transformative, journey you describe, so sharply, so gorgeously says everything important I need to know, about the power of connection, both to destroy a spirit, when it is withheld, and also, to change a person's experience of self and the world, when it is offered unconditionally.
Mr. Max, you are resilient and insightful, and yes, oh, so very special.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It touches me deeply.
Mr. Max, you are resilient and insightful, and yes, oh, so very special.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It touches me deeply.
8
Wonderful piece, Josh. I also know what it's like to weep when you realize people are genuinely kind and not flat-out mean. I think you have done well. Sometimes it takes us a long time to realize it.
8
Where were your parents, dude? What kind of twisted psychobabble were they sold to put you into that kind of violent, abusive environment? This is so sad. Sometimes the best we can do is live on, try our best to forgive, and to work around the damage. Wishing you a peaceful life.
4
I might have been your teacher. You described my career as an emotional support teacher from the receiving end. Thanks. I have always wondered....
5
Thank you for your poignant description of a world I thought about growing up but never understood. I'm glad you survived, learned, assimilated and succeeded.
3
What a great essay.
8
This is a beautifully written, and moving piece. The struggles in life are gifts as well. Hope to read more of your words!
6
Everyone can ask such a question, whether in SPED or regular ed: did my education help or hurt me? While the writer was tortured (and loved) in his classes, the same was happening to his counterparts in regular classes.
Childhood can be a nightmare at school. Luckily, kids are amazingly resilient. It only hurts if an adult tells you it should hurt.
Childhood can be a nightmare at school. Luckily, kids are amazingly resilient. It only hurts if an adult tells you it should hurt.
2
Josh Max, you're a fine writer.
Thanks for sharing this personal narrative. It's a human story that makes readers think and feel.
Thanks for sharing this personal narrative. It's a human story that makes readers think and feel.
20
Good article. My response is that we have a very serious problem in American society: Social science--psychology, psychiatry--and of course great literature--is far from keeping pace with STEM fields and is applied to people from one direction only, which is to say "Power" (educational system, law enforcement, political parties seeking to influence, business seeking to market) applies psychology and psychiatry when ALL people should be tested for various qualities, characteristics so we get a total and fair and objective picture of the social situation so that when we typically type people and often accuse people of being "mad" or "hyperactive" or "narcissistic" or what have you such is not based on subjectivity or is not a mind game applied by power but is a true objective assessment.
As things stand today children are routinely labelled when the parents and teachers of children should be tested as well (if YOU want to label someone, it is only fair that YOU get tested too so we get an objective picture of relationship). And of course people are denied jobs, ostracized for this and that by people applying power and psychology one way when especially people in power should be assessed so no psychology mind games are occurring. One look at our Presidential candidates should give us serious pause. Why does the public not have access to total psychological, characteristic, intelligence, moral, etc. profile of candidates and what of people granted National Security Clearance?
As things stand today children are routinely labelled when the parents and teachers of children should be tested as well (if YOU want to label someone, it is only fair that YOU get tested too so we get an objective picture of relationship). And of course people are denied jobs, ostracized for this and that by people applying power and psychology one way when especially people in power should be assessed so no psychology mind games are occurring. One look at our Presidential candidates should give us serious pause. Why does the public not have access to total psychological, characteristic, intelligence, moral, etc. profile of candidates and what of people granted National Security Clearance?
2
This story resonates for us as a parent - thank you for sharing. We live in an affluent community where our daughter (a high functioning ADHD and ADD child) had access to EI and SPED services. As she has progressed through elementary school, we saw she was losing ground academically and socially. Through her IEP she was continuing to be more isolated - her peers were noticing and she was noticing it herself. Unfortunately, regardless of well meaning teachers, the legal bar for "least restrictive environment" was she was an offered placement in a district school which would have put her almost completely out of the mainstream, save recess and a an hour or two of "typical" classroom participation. The whipsaw of in and out seemed disorienting to me - how would she feel?
We ultimately made the difficult decision for our Complex Learner (with personal and financial sacrifice) to place her in a private school where we believe she has the "least restrictive environment" - in a classroom, with her peers, which tailors the academic and social curriculum for her needs. In this environment, she is fully integrated and included. We have gone from zero birthday party invitations to many. We have also gone from parent exclusion to a community of empathy and support. We know we are very fortunate that we can make this choice.
We ultimately made the difficult decision for our Complex Learner (with personal and financial sacrifice) to place her in a private school where we believe she has the "least restrictive environment" - in a classroom, with her peers, which tailors the academic and social curriculum for her needs. In this environment, she is fully integrated and included. We have gone from zero birthday party invitations to many. We have also gone from parent exclusion to a community of empathy and support. We know we are very fortunate that we can make this choice.
51
Thanks for this, from someone who just made the same decision, and is equally grateful to have the money to do it. Protecting one's child is hard; my son does not have the ability to tell me how he experiences things, and I am never certain I've put the information together right.
5
What a beautiful essay; it brought forth tears.
3
I can't imagine what would have happened to you nowadays - drugged to the hilt most likely. Given that, it was probably a gift to have been able to "work things out" in this 70s version of Special Ed. Keep writing - quite a gift with words. Wonderful piece.
4
The human soul is amazing - it can survive the best of intentions of others.
6
You are a product of all your life experiences, good and bad. And it seems like you turned out pretty awesome, Josh. I sometimes have the same conflicted thoughts about the 4 years I spent in the gifted class :) It was some of the best of times in terms of cultivating my academic interests, but some of the worst of times in terms of social ostracism. But I wouldn't trade it because those years are part of who I am. Thanks for sharing your story.
2
Thank you for this incredibly moving piece. We rarely hear from kids who were in Special Ed because many of them are unable to move out of Special Ed because their needs are so overwhelming.
Thank you again.
Thank you again.
2
Whoa. Deeply felt, and beautifully written. Thanks for this.
7
That you wrote this article probably answers the question. You were hurt and wounded but you also found healing. Knowing how the positive experiences of my childhood education have formed valuable building blocks all of my life, may I suggest it may now still be possible to "re do" some of those chaotic years, whether guided by a professional therapist or educator or continuing to process your experiences as you so ably did in this essay, not to mention through your music.
2
You answered your own question - "Special ed got me directly in touch with a deeper place in the same way music would later on." However, please realize that Special Ed today is a much different environment. Thank you for sharing your story.
3
I love this essay.
2
It's amazing what kindness can do for a kid. My family was pretty difficult and, as the youngest, I was the "identified patient." But I still recall, fondly, 55 years later, the psychologist who put his arm on my shoulder, as we walked back after testing, and said kindly, "you must get very good marks in school."
3
From the article:
"In special ed, I immediately toned down my outbursts, for purely practical reasons. The kids fought like grown-ups. If you hit someone in the arm, he might hit you back in the face or the genitals. "
So is the reason why classrooms are much more out of control nowadays that kids are no longer subject to "natural consequences". And what sort of psychological illness is immediately relieved by practical consequences? I thought that corporal punishment didn't work.
"In special ed, I immediately toned down my outbursts, for purely practical reasons. The kids fought like grown-ups. If you hit someone in the arm, he might hit you back in the face or the genitals. "
So is the reason why classrooms are much more out of control nowadays that kids are no longer subject to "natural consequences". And what sort of psychological illness is immediately relieved by practical consequences? I thought that corporal punishment didn't work.
2
"Corporal punishment" comes from authority.
"Peer-based attitude adjustment" comes from....your peers.
And it's generally far more effective at altering behaviors. The "why" should be obvious.
"Peer-based attitude adjustment" comes from....your peers.
And it's generally far more effective at altering behaviors. The "why" should be obvious.
"The question of whether or not special ed helped or hurt me has haunted me my whole life, though, and it comes and goes in cycles." I would suggest that it helped you recognize, at an early age, that you didn't want to associate with kids who brutalized you; you were placed there because it seems that, possibly, that's what you were doing to other kids in "regular" school. I wonder if there is an opinion piece written by someone who had to suffer through "regular" education being brutalized, by you, from grades K-3 before you learned how to behave?
2
Touching story, special education!
2
Nicely done, and from the heart. I was a special Ed teacher for 20 years. Emotionally disturbed New York City kids. So I can relate, a little.
2
When I was in 7th grade, as the 'weakest' member of the class, a group of the In Kids ran me for 'President of Nothing', complete with mocking hurtful speeches, posters, and all those looks and whispers in the hall. The English teacher, a timid woman who was just grateful she wasn't the butt of the joke, did nothing but smile timidly. I didn't dare to tell my parents because, after all, I was 13. The humiliation lasted most of the year. But through it all, I found friends, other outcasts, several new immigrant arrivals who spoke English poorly, a fat girl with bad acne, a boy who was far behind in his growth spurt. We hung together, we laughed, we talked about interesting things, and we made it through. Of course it hurt - over 40 years later, I still remember how much it hurt. But the lessons - how to not give into to the crowd, how to seek out others similarly treated, how to go on when the going was tough, how to not let it show. All of this has served me well, shaped me, strengthened me, made me the adult I am. No one is without scars - I have no idea what scars the In Kids were bringing to school. But it is those scars - the compassion they can teach, the memories, the pivotal moments, that make us stronger better adults. Because we MUST be that teacher who hugged you, we MUST be the kid who shared his sandwich, we MUST see the fat girl with acne as a friend, we who know how absolutely important that is.
60
Very interesting and thought=provoking article. Thanks for writing.
6
What a terrific OpEd piece, Josh, not only because it no doubt reminds many of us of our own strange journeys through public schools, but for its lack of judging others in favor of reflection.
Thank You
Thank You
6
Everyone wants someone or something to blame when things are not going well: what happened when we were babies, in school, at camp, with our siblings, etc. Believe it or not, except for the physical violence, many kids in that era experienced the same kinds of things and feelings you did, just not in special ed! (Simply think of all the kids who grew up in parochial schools!) Our physical and emotional scars are part of who we are, and "the lucky sperm club" works in a myriad of ways, mostly unlucky! Most kids do not grow up with everything they need. How lucky you were to find music!
1
I was also sent to a child psychiatrist in the 1970's at around 7 and didn't speak. You just brought that experience back, sitting there, staring, and the hapless psychiatrist bringing out games, knitting, anything to try to engage. Maybe none of us spoke?
3
This story remainds me on my childhood - the most interesting part of my grade two to grade four school program is the long one mile walk from our house to school and back. The journey passed through walking in a filed, crossing a market. a transport bus terminal, side of a pond, passing few temples and a football ground. My class mates were friendly, teachers were loving and homework was light. We learned more from outside interactions and observations - how vegetable sellers weigh the vegetables, how sweet makers mKe the sweets, how pan makers make pans by spreading lime and a paste on the pan leaf and add the nuts and other ingredients and fold it. How beggars beg and kind people offer them few coins, how illiterate shop owners asked my friend to read the previous day's news paper to know the world and in return gave us few candy. Those were the happy days and it was nineteen fiftees. How the developed world changed the beautiful school days into a nightmare by materialistic understanding of the world. Can we get those happy school system back - most likely not. It is a different world of special Ed and Advanced classes.
4
My sixth grade teacher, Mrs. Capani, decided that she had enough of my fidgeting and outbursts and gave me my own desk in the hall next to the door so that I could hear the lessons, but no longer participate. Mrs. Brooks, the teacher next door, told me that I no longer could take recess, for reasons I never knew, and I had to sit in her classroom doing homework instead. They both cut me off from any interaction with my classmates. I wished that they would die, and when Mrs. Brooks actually did die, I blamed myself. I shut down. I sat alone at lunch and never used the school restroom.
I am thankful that the art supply room was unlocked across the hall from my desk. I drew cartoons all day and gave them to the girls as they passed by.
A few years later, while I was home on a break from College (studying Art), I ran into Mrs. Capani in a supermarket. She told me that I was the reason she quit teaching!
Thank God she did.
I am thankful that the art supply room was unlocked across the hall from my desk. I drew cartoons all day and gave them to the girls as they passed by.
A few years later, while I was home on a break from College (studying Art), I ran into Mrs. Capani in a supermarket. She told me that I was the reason she quit teaching!
Thank God she did.
26
It would be wonderful to think about special ed education as loving, caring, skilled, personal, individualized, and yes, special.
Unfortunately, the description here is probably not far off in many schools. Our public schools are being deeply defunded and voucher/parochial schools do not have to provide "special ed" services and can throw out a "special ed" kid at any times, not leaving parents many choices.
One of my jobs in a long nursing career was a school nurse for a couple years. I would advise parents a couple things. Stay in close touch with teachers, administrators, and yes, school nurses. Also stay in touch with the school boards. You are your child's voice. Battle for your child. Attend their schools, their IEP's, and make your presence known. This advice might sound far fetched and unattainable or highfalutin to some, but children's rights are precious and their rights must be upheld by their caregivers. Children must be protected.
Josh, society was so wrong, your rights were violated in many ways. Thank you for sharing your story, our hearts are broken knowing your truth.
We can only hope you are smiling now in a world that appreciates writing and appreciates music. And that you are treated with respect, dignity and worth.
Unfortunately, the description here is probably not far off in many schools. Our public schools are being deeply defunded and voucher/parochial schools do not have to provide "special ed" services and can throw out a "special ed" kid at any times, not leaving parents many choices.
One of my jobs in a long nursing career was a school nurse for a couple years. I would advise parents a couple things. Stay in close touch with teachers, administrators, and yes, school nurses. Also stay in touch with the school boards. You are your child's voice. Battle for your child. Attend their schools, their IEP's, and make your presence known. This advice might sound far fetched and unattainable or highfalutin to some, but children's rights are precious and their rights must be upheld by their caregivers. Children must be protected.
Josh, society was so wrong, your rights were violated in many ways. Thank you for sharing your story, our hearts are broken knowing your truth.
We can only hope you are smiling now in a world that appreciates writing and appreciates music. And that you are treated with respect, dignity and worth.
3
Extraordinarily evocative. You seem to have looked out for yourself as best you could, and things seem to have turned out OK. And I suppose there are those of us without much imagination who don't wonder what things would have been like if we'd found a different path. I think it's human nature to believe that if things had been different, that they would have been better. However, the truth is, that if things had been different, they might have been worse.
3
My brother suffered a similar fate in "special Ed" in the '70's, after a particularly brutal stint in early elementary as a red head kid during forced busing and a year sitting a broom closet because the teachers didn't know how to handle him. He never recovered, and as intelligent as he is, he never learned any thing good from being "that kid". The label followed him through school and haunts him today, a man almost 50. It hurts me deeply to know that others suffered as well.
8
As an elementary teacher, I wish I could go back in time and be there for you. Thanks for sharing this poignant tale. It motivates me to go back into the schoolhouse on Monday, and be just a little more patient, just a little more generous, and just a little more understanding of my many students who struggle with ADHD, anxiety, depression,and self-doubt.
4
Perhaps this essay demonstrates the value of mainstreaming - kids of all abilities placed together, learning together and from each other, all the while lifting up everyone around them.
2
Moving, true, and fantastic. Thirty years in Public Education, I am speechless. Today we drug the hell out of kids and hire another psychologist to remedy their problems with paperwork. Passing everything on and on, afraid of the next lawsuit.
5
Well, what's the alternative? Letting them traumatize other children with their violence and become such a distraction that no one learns? The old system definitely had its flaws but mainstreaming extremely violent children just hurts all the other children in the class. Of course, we could take a look at their home lives and see why they are so violent but putting the blame for bad parenting on the parents isn't PC.
Loved this. Special ed has changed in the past couple of decades I imagine. Nowadays the author would probably be doped up to his eyeballs on Ritalin so they could keep him in mainstream education and save money. It's good to hear that this troubled kid was allowed a chance to work out his problems with support and time and with the support of his other non-neurotypical peers.
4
I was very moved. Loved the mix of humor and the punch of sorrow at the end. Kindness and that hug from the teacher were powerful. Don't know if it is allowed these days, though. As to the music path, indeed,it is a wonderful way to channel and bring peace to those unruly emotions. Real medicine. Writing too. And pieces like this.
8
Wow! Amazing what we remember. Turns out those random acts of kindness are biggies.
There was no special ed where and when I grew up. Looking back, the kids with behavior problems or learning disabilities were just tossed in with the rest of us. Some were my friends, others threatened to beat me up after school. Everybody adjusted as well as they could. They were some of the more interesting kids around.
Sounds like "least restrictive environment" was a concept still getting worked out where the author went to school. He's living proof that kids are resilient. I'm hoping today's kids will have more random kindness memories and fewer dealing with bullies memories. Although banding together and tossing the bully out the second floor window makes a great story.
There was no special ed where and when I grew up. Looking back, the kids with behavior problems or learning disabilities were just tossed in with the rest of us. Some were my friends, others threatened to beat me up after school. Everybody adjusted as well as they could. They were some of the more interesting kids around.
Sounds like "least restrictive environment" was a concept still getting worked out where the author went to school. He's living proof that kids are resilient. I'm hoping today's kids will have more random kindness memories and fewer dealing with bullies memories. Although banding together and tossing the bully out the second floor window makes a great story.
4
The main problem in Special Ed classrooms is that it becomes a catch all for every kid who doesn't function well in a regular classroom. Behavior problems, physical disability, mental disability, and others are put in one room. That operates more like a day care center than a regular academic classroom.
So kids that have trouble focusing and completing their work, or are easily distracted, are put in a room with kids who scream and punch and kick and run around the room.
Special ed classrooms end up being a very modest and somewhat convoluted response to many types of learning challenges.
So kids that have trouble focusing and completing their work, or are easily distracted, are put in a room with kids who scream and punch and kick and run around the room.
Special ed classrooms end up being a very modest and somewhat convoluted response to many types of learning challenges.
7
As someone who grew up in the most ordinary circumstances, I would contend that not only myself but most other people I have known, have all survived at least a few strange, inexplicable or traumatic experiences in childhood, single incidents or chronic pressures that altered our trajectory towards adulthood for better or for ill. No one completely escapes some weirdness or stress: a twisted teacher, a bully, torment by siblings, brushes with death, a distant parent—a myriad ruptures of innocence in ways perhaps merely mystifying but often detrimental.
I would give up trying to sort it out. We are all of us simply the product of our unique reactions —good, bad or neutral—to the strangeness that happens to us and around us. To a child, it's all pretty strange. You grew into your current, adult self either "because of" or "in spite of" your slightly surreal side trip—it doesn't matter at this point.
What matters now is that you have found a creative way to be in the world and have found some measure of happiness there.
I'm hoping you will use your experiences to help even just one kid who finds him/her self in similar circumstances. It sounds like you have much to offer in this regard (experience, insight, humor, musical talent) to help another find their way, with writing, story telling, or music.
I would give up trying to sort it out. We are all of us simply the product of our unique reactions —good, bad or neutral—to the strangeness that happens to us and around us. To a child, it's all pretty strange. You grew into your current, adult self either "because of" or "in spite of" your slightly surreal side trip—it doesn't matter at this point.
What matters now is that you have found a creative way to be in the world and have found some measure of happiness there.
I'm hoping you will use your experiences to help even just one kid who finds him/her self in similar circumstances. It sounds like you have much to offer in this regard (experience, insight, humor, musical talent) to help another find their way, with writing, story telling, or music.
1
Thank you for this heart wrenching description of a childhood which many can identify with...one part or another, not perhaps, only the "special ed" component. I do not jump to use the word "healed"..too cheery for my understanding of how old scars stay, but their impact continues to grow fainter and less present as we grow older and are hopefully able to experience life in a fuller way than was possible in childhood.
3
Josh,
As the current head of a school in NYC and a former care worker with challenging, institutionalized children, I was moved and infuriated by your thoughtful piece. It is not either/or. Your sensitivity and obvious intelligence didn't require being shunted into "special ed" or to be abused in an uncaring public school. I'm glad someone hugged you in 4th grade. You should have been hugged and understood from the beginning of school by teachers who know that all children are different, that impulsivity is natural, not pathological, that sitting still is unnatural and that "hyperactivity" is a normal state for many boys.
The so-called "problems" of hyperactivity and learning differences are almost always flaws in the institution, not in the child.
I'm glad things seem to have turned out reasonably well.
As the current head of a school in NYC and a former care worker with challenging, institutionalized children, I was moved and infuriated by your thoughtful piece. It is not either/or. Your sensitivity and obvious intelligence didn't require being shunted into "special ed" or to be abused in an uncaring public school. I'm glad someone hugged you in 4th grade. You should have been hugged and understood from the beginning of school by teachers who know that all children are different, that impulsivity is natural, not pathological, that sitting still is unnatural and that "hyperactivity" is a normal state for many boys.
The so-called "problems" of hyperactivity and learning differences are almost always flaws in the institution, not in the child.
I'm glad things seem to have turned out reasonably well.
19
Actually the problem is often the parent. Did you read the part about it being the "first time" he felt supported and accepted. He should have felt supported and accepted from birth - long before he encountered the public school system.
That special bus was used in my town as a warning, and it was quite clear to us that if we did not tow the line properly we'd end up there. We were just kids, but it set the tone for how this country works: punishment will be meted out until moral improves. It's just the way our dysfunctional America works. I never really saw school as a place of education, to me it was more about conforming. So, in many ways, you decided to not fit-in, and that my friend is your greatest blessing. I think, but I am not sure, that your life is a lot richer as a result of being in the very special school bus. It made you!
3
If that's what it takes to keep our school system from degenerating into the "Lord of the Flies" then so be it. The school system where I am still has the little yellow bus that takes the extremely violent children to the "special program". I prefer that to some of the other school districts I've heard of where they actually have all the other children wait in the hallway until the violent kid is done tantrumming and tearing up the classroom.
Of course, a lot of the time "that" kid is tantrumming in frustration because he is not getting appropriate supports and interventions (often already mandated in an IEP). I've also seen it in response to bullying that gets ignored by the teacher.
You raise a valuable point and persistent problem that exist in our educational system. perhaps our brain is evolving faster than we can truly understand, hence a lack of skilled teachers at the university level..
My husband was a special education teacher in New York City during the late 1970s and early 1980s. At that time, NYC public schools were under some sort of court order to educate all staff about the still newly passed Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (I.D.E.A.) This is the law that removed kids with obvious special education needs away from the basement and into the mainstream of public schools.
When my husband began teaching in the South Bronx, the special education class was actually right next to the boiler room in the basement. That changed fairly rapidly after the passage of PL 94-142, the I.D.E.A. but not fast enough for all special education students in NYC. There were still too many racial and ethnic minorities assigned to the "600 schools" where identified special education students with behavior problems were completely segregated from non-identified students. That changed after the Board of Education was put under that court order.
I was curious whether Josh was one of the students who was directly impacted by the passage of the I.D.E.A. It sure sounds like his first years were prior to its passage, and the rest of his time as a special education student was during the period of change from the old regime...well described in this column...to the current system where the default situation for students identified with learning or behavior problems is the regular classroom with supports provided by special education staff.
When my husband began teaching in the South Bronx, the special education class was actually right next to the boiler room in the basement. That changed fairly rapidly after the passage of PL 94-142, the I.D.E.A. but not fast enough for all special education students in NYC. There were still too many racial and ethnic minorities assigned to the "600 schools" where identified special education students with behavior problems were completely segregated from non-identified students. That changed after the Board of Education was put under that court order.
I was curious whether Josh was one of the students who was directly impacted by the passage of the I.D.E.A. It sure sounds like his first years were prior to its passage, and the rest of his time as a special education student was during the period of change from the old regime...well described in this column...to the current system where the default situation for students identified with learning or behavior problems is the regular classroom with supports provided by special education staff.
Great story, moving and inspirational. But I'm afraid this is inadvertently going to to open the door to ever more bashing of public education. Special education today in no way resembles what Josh described. Students have multiple interventions from one-to-one aides to resource room, reading and writing labs, consultant teachers, differentiated instruction, plus numerous other accommodations (testing, class size, etc.) to ensure that a child's unique needs are met. Teachers and parents meet regularly with the student to assess their individualized plan. It is not perfect, but it is also no longer the 1970's.
9
Thanks for writing this. I went through a program as well. Never really knew what was particularly wrong with me as I found the work to be incredibly easy to the point where I just stopped focusing on school around third or fourth grade and instead of doing homework I read up on a good portion of things; classics to modern stuff. There was always this lack of interest in the whole process of having to wake up at a particular time, having to leave the house and associate with other people. I would of been just happy with home schooling.
After kindergarten I was moved from that school of origin to another which was the only school in the district that offered the special ed program. I often reflect on the damages it did and the benefits that came with it. The damages, that little yellow bus for 6 years pointed out to the peers of my neighborhood that I was different. Often exclusion from local play, which further influenced this sense of difference from me and them. I was already an introvert when I started kindergarten. I remember having to be awoken and forced to leave home in a state of grogginess and tiredness for pre-k..and to deal with the chipperness of everyone in that program to only it be dragged on to the next year in kindergarten. I could write a book on this but character limits stops me here. The benefits is seem similar, an ability to step away from the cookie-cutter mob mentality. This benefit has been very good to me mainly in how I make money.
After kindergarten I was moved from that school of origin to another which was the only school in the district that offered the special ed program. I often reflect on the damages it did and the benefits that came with it. The damages, that little yellow bus for 6 years pointed out to the peers of my neighborhood that I was different. Often exclusion from local play, which further influenced this sense of difference from me and them. I was already an introvert when I started kindergarten. I remember having to be awoken and forced to leave home in a state of grogginess and tiredness for pre-k..and to deal with the chipperness of everyone in that program to only it be dragged on to the next year in kindergarten. I could write a book on this but character limits stops me here. The benefits is seem similar, an ability to step away from the cookie-cutter mob mentality. This benefit has been very good to me mainly in how I make money.
25
Although this is an important view of what "special education" looked like a few decades ago, it isn't anywhere close to what it looks like now. I have been a special education teacher in Colorado for nearly 15 years - my students have NEVER been segregated in a special building, and, no matter what their type of disability or behavioral challenges, all spend a significant part of their day being educated with all other students in the school. Their progress and their educational activities are reviewed frequently, and they are physically and, to the extent the adults in the building can ensure, psychologically safe.
However, an ex-relative also experienced special education in the 60's and 70's, and tells similar stories. As a teacher, I am grateful that things have changed.
However, an ex-relative also experienced special education in the 60's and 70's, and tells similar stories. As a teacher, I am grateful that things have changed.
9
I think all of us can relate to this story in some way, because we all grew up around many children, and some of them were 'misbehaved'. Whether it was us or someone else, anyone with empathy would learn the same things as the victims and perpetrators.
In 'normal' school, I witnessed temper tantrums that led to the throwing of a chair by one student, jumping out a window by another, and at the opposite end of the spectrum one kid that was picked on beyond comprehension. 2 of 3 ended up in special ed.
I always paid special attention to these kids because I was concerned for them. So I know some of the results.
The window jumper made reappearance and then disappeared back into special ed. He seemed the most confused. The chair thrower somehow avoided special ed and became one of the most well-liked people in our high school. The picked-on kid eventually reconnected and apologized to us all for his errors -- and this to me shows he was essentially hopelessly lost in Stockholm Syndrome. He should not have apologized, rather most of our class should have apologized to him.
The 2 of 3 that went to special end had the worst results. The one that stayed had the best results.
It sounds to me like you survived, and despite this one positive experience you relate to us, it was generally not helpful. What I learned from the kid who became so popular in high school (Prom King), is that early childhood behavior problems are not an indicator of character.
We're getting wiser.
In 'normal' school, I witnessed temper tantrums that led to the throwing of a chair by one student, jumping out a window by another, and at the opposite end of the spectrum one kid that was picked on beyond comprehension. 2 of 3 ended up in special ed.
I always paid special attention to these kids because I was concerned for them. So I know some of the results.
The window jumper made reappearance and then disappeared back into special ed. He seemed the most confused. The chair thrower somehow avoided special ed and became one of the most well-liked people in our high school. The picked-on kid eventually reconnected and apologized to us all for his errors -- and this to me shows he was essentially hopelessly lost in Stockholm Syndrome. He should not have apologized, rather most of our class should have apologized to him.
The 2 of 3 that went to special end had the worst results. The one that stayed had the best results.
It sounds to me like you survived, and despite this one positive experience you relate to us, it was generally not helpful. What I learned from the kid who became so popular in high school (Prom King), is that early childhood behavior problems are not an indicator of character.
We're getting wiser.
2
As a teacher, I need to say that this doesn't sound like "Special Ed" to me, as I know it in my school. This sounds like "separate but equal" explanation redux from the 1950s.
Special Ed as I understand is based on the philosophy that children may require individualized educational learning plans (IEPs) as a result of diagnosed learning disabilities or impairments. Having an IEP is both an explanation and a plan - not an excuse. The education, and learning, still needs to get done. It's up to the teacher to differentiate the instruction in accordance with the plan to ensure the students success in the class, at whatever level that may be.
As a teacher, I fully understand how difficult this may be. But I am appalled that you were subjected to the name calling and disrespect (something that typical needs kids shouldn't/wouldn't be expected to contend with either) in a separate room in a separate facility.
Special Ed as I understand is based on the philosophy that children may require individualized educational learning plans (IEPs) as a result of diagnosed learning disabilities or impairments. Having an IEP is both an explanation and a plan - not an excuse. The education, and learning, still needs to get done. It's up to the teacher to differentiate the instruction in accordance with the plan to ensure the students success in the class, at whatever level that may be.
As a teacher, I fully understand how difficult this may be. But I am appalled that you were subjected to the name calling and disrespect (something that typical needs kids shouldn't/wouldn't be expected to contend with either) in a separate room in a separate facility.
5
It is always sad to me that childhood decisions carry such heavy ramifications. That it was a decision rather than, say, a disorder, is evident given that he immediately changed his behavior when there was no longer a pay-off. It makes me wonder how much love and support Max rejected during his brawling, furniture-destroying period. Or when he carried weapons to junior high school.
1
When I was in 7th grade in the Albuquerque public school system, carrying a weapon was the most reliable survival insurance. Thank God my parents got me out of there starting the next year.
In most of California, we spend much less money on education than in many other states. We spend about half what is spent in New York on K-12 education. We spend a lot on Special Ed.
I worked one year and some summers teaching SPED Pre-school. There were times when there were more adults than students in my room. Everyone I worked with was dedicated to helping the children in their class and in other SPED classrooms. I would say that working with children who are emotionally traumatized, for a variety of reasons, is the most difficult work, in my limited experience. Often, children who are assaulting others are the most difficult to help. Getting head-butted by a four-year-old can be extremely painful, especially when you need to respond as if you are not hurt.
Currently, school districts are putting more and more special needs students in regular ed. classes, with few if any supports. It is easy to point to the special needs child and talk about the best environment for that specific child. The impact on the other 31 children in a typical CA fourth or fifth grade classroom is more difficult to assess. Even the hardest working, brightest teachers have only so many hours to prepare ways to manage and teach their classes.
It would be great if the NYTimes could devote some resources to investigating this growing trend in education, and the impact that is having on regular ed. students. School districts will of course invoke privacy at every turn.
I worked one year and some summers teaching SPED Pre-school. There were times when there were more adults than students in my room. Everyone I worked with was dedicated to helping the children in their class and in other SPED classrooms. I would say that working with children who are emotionally traumatized, for a variety of reasons, is the most difficult work, in my limited experience. Often, children who are assaulting others are the most difficult to help. Getting head-butted by a four-year-old can be extremely painful, especially when you need to respond as if you are not hurt.
Currently, school districts are putting more and more special needs students in regular ed. classes, with few if any supports. It is easy to point to the special needs child and talk about the best environment for that specific child. The impact on the other 31 children in a typical CA fourth or fifth grade classroom is more difficult to assess. Even the hardest working, brightest teachers have only so many hours to prepare ways to manage and teach their classes.
It would be great if the NYTimes could devote some resources to investigating this growing trend in education, and the impact that is having on regular ed. students. School districts will of course invoke privacy at every turn.
20
My mother lives by the junior high school I went to, and I walked by there today. Although I was not 'special ed', I can relate well to the scary feelings of attending new schools, because we moved from Paris to Taipei to Tokyo to Bellevue, WA between 1976 and 1979. The culture shock of coming to the U.S. at the start of my adolescence was overwhelming, and I've frequently looked back at those first couple years of junior high the same way Josh Max remembers his schools in New York. There are many bad memories of bullies and ultra competitive sons and daughters of the upper middle class Seattle suburb. I felt suicidal for two years, but ultimately made some good friends. I'm not sure whether special ed could have been much worse than the 'normal' school I attended. Kids reflect the belief systems of their parents in a crude way, and the kids I went to school with were Reagan youth, insensitive, selfish, materialistic, cynical, and ruthlessly determined to win at the capitalistic game.
2
Poignant and authentic. My now 19 year old daughter crashed, burned, and became aggressive and self-harming at age 14. Spent high school in a residential school 45 minutes from home, after two years of special ed., therapeutic day school, psychotropic meds in an attempt to keep her (and others) safe, and everyday chaos. The residential school the district paid for was filled with bright troubled kids with a variety of issues. Weaned off the meds that didn't much help her anyway, my girl slowly began learning coping skills and losing psych diagnoses. It took four years. They also discovered--no one else had noticed that a bright kid could also have learning disabilities--that she was ADD. The school--and music and art--saved her life. Thanks for sharing your story.
24
I hate special ed.
Don't get me wrong; I think it is important - no, imperative - to identify students, particularly young ones, who need assistance and give them what they need.
We do this well with "early intervention" where if a child is identified with a speech impediment, fine motor issues, sensory processing disorders, or other ailments, children are given physical therapy, speech therapy, psychological therapy, occupational therapy, and many other forms of treatment depending on their condition. Indeed, my twins, born three months premature, received a few of the above. And although it is impossible for me to measure the benefit (since I don't have a control group to compare), I know in my heart that the benefit was immeasurable.
Once a student enters school, any sort of "non-conformity" is lumped into special education. It is a place to put "those kids" who cause "problems" for teachers. I see children all day long who are lumped together in special education classes without any similar disorder. There are the children who learn at a slower rate, children who are hyperactive, children who are unchallenged, children whose home situation prevents them from success, all thrown in together in a place that is impossible to serve them.
The only way to fix this is to address each child's needs individually without removing them from the classroom. Obviously, some children with sever psychosis will have to be removed, but not to the extent to which we do now.
Don't get me wrong; I think it is important - no, imperative - to identify students, particularly young ones, who need assistance and give them what they need.
We do this well with "early intervention" where if a child is identified with a speech impediment, fine motor issues, sensory processing disorders, or other ailments, children are given physical therapy, speech therapy, psychological therapy, occupational therapy, and many other forms of treatment depending on their condition. Indeed, my twins, born three months premature, received a few of the above. And although it is impossible for me to measure the benefit (since I don't have a control group to compare), I know in my heart that the benefit was immeasurable.
Once a student enters school, any sort of "non-conformity" is lumped into special education. It is a place to put "those kids" who cause "problems" for teachers. I see children all day long who are lumped together in special education classes without any similar disorder. There are the children who learn at a slower rate, children who are hyperactive, children who are unchallenged, children whose home situation prevents them from success, all thrown in together in a place that is impossible to serve them.
The only way to fix this is to address each child's needs individually without removing them from the classroom. Obviously, some children with sever psychosis will have to be removed, but not to the extent to which we do now.
4
"The only way to fix this is to address each child's needs individually without removing them from the classroom."
How, exactly, is a regular ed. teacher supposed to accomplish that task? Given finite resources, how does the teacher continue to meet the very diverse needs of her or his regular education students while at the same time meeting the often extraordinary and time consuming needs of students well outside the norm?
Unfortunately the answer is that the teacher cannot meet all those needs and regular ed. students suffer greatly in lose of attention for their education. Violence, threats of violence, incredibly disruptive behavior, etc. really aren't helpful to a nine-year-old who is struggling to learn.
How, exactly, is a regular ed. teacher supposed to accomplish that task? Given finite resources, how does the teacher continue to meet the very diverse needs of her or his regular education students while at the same time meeting the often extraordinary and time consuming needs of students well outside the norm?
Unfortunately the answer is that the teacher cannot meet all those needs and regular ed. students suffer greatly in lose of attention for their education. Violence, threats of violence, incredibly disruptive behavior, etc. really aren't helpful to a nine-year-old who is struggling to learn.
16
Josh Max got a brutal form of behavioral modification, if teachers or parents treated children the way these children treated each other they'd be jailed. Josh shouldn't have suffered so much but he learned something valuable: that he wasn't completely feral or completely out of control. He could control himself under threat. Notice the active "I did this" or "I decided" and "carrying 3 knives, a pellet pistol, and a pocket full of rocks". The accounts are usually passive: I was lost, out of control, until I was saved by Adderall or whatever. I admire Josh Max for saving himself under overwhelming pressure as a child and as an adult in bad times.
He didn't tell us "what happened at home". I may be reading too much into "I felt for the first time what it was like to be supported and accepted, taken care of rather than yelled at, punished or shunted off ..." but his parents were, at best, unable to understand him or help him. We need to develop appropriate non-violent cognitive behavioral therapy for children - and their parents, too. It would be more empowering than drugs.
Today Josh would be diagnosed (probably with ADHD) and his symptoms would be controlled with Adderall or maybe he would be considered to be on the Autism Spectrum (due to no talking) and treated with other drugs. He might still be taking drugs. He would probably not have missed as much schooling or suffered as much - but would he own his life to the same extent?
He didn't tell us "what happened at home". I may be reading too much into "I felt for the first time what it was like to be supported and accepted, taken care of rather than yelled at, punished or shunted off ..." but his parents were, at best, unable to understand him or help him. We need to develop appropriate non-violent cognitive behavioral therapy for children - and their parents, too. It would be more empowering than drugs.
Today Josh would be diagnosed (probably with ADHD) and his symptoms would be controlled with Adderall or maybe he would be considered to be on the Autism Spectrum (due to no talking) and treated with other drugs. He might still be taking drugs. He would probably not have missed as much schooling or suffered as much - but would he own his life to the same extent?
12
Ahh… As someone who was a SPED kid, I would agree on the fact that it has a weird way of leaving a hideous mark. Looking back at my original SPED paperwork my iq hovered around a 61. Now, I am around 120. I certainly wonder if my low academic scores during my middle and high school years were because of being within a structure that values compassion, safety, exclusion, and charity.
What remains from my SPED years is a callous sense of rejection. On Facebook, when I was featured on multiple local news networks for a protest I organized, little to no individuals from my primary/secondary school years liked, or commented on the success I achieved with some of the activism I organized. But, when a co-student posted that she was going to be on those same news station five years later, students from my elementary, middle, and high school commented and liked with pride.
Now, I appear to most people to be a mature, independent, successful, and intelligent adult. I have been a manager in organizations, featured on the media, published, and been a consultant. All before I was 28. But, the scars of being an "other" remain. Real change for the disability community when the services tasked with helping us change their paradigm of thought about the services they provide. Instead of being about "charity" "safety" and "compassion", they instead should be about "inclusion", "equals", "us".
What remains from my SPED years is a callous sense of rejection. On Facebook, when I was featured on multiple local news networks for a protest I organized, little to no individuals from my primary/secondary school years liked, or commented on the success I achieved with some of the activism I organized. But, when a co-student posted that she was going to be on those same news station five years later, students from my elementary, middle, and high school commented and liked with pride.
Now, I appear to most people to be a mature, independent, successful, and intelligent adult. I have been a manager in organizations, featured on the media, published, and been a consultant. All before I was 28. But, the scars of being an "other" remain. Real change for the disability community when the services tasked with helping us change their paradigm of thought about the services they provide. Instead of being about "charity" "safety" and "compassion", they instead should be about "inclusion", "equals", "us".
11
While Mr. Max's experiences clearly derive from the Dark Ages of special education, I must applaud him for the innate positivity and resilience with which he responded to his appalling experience. As an experienced 2015 main-stream high school teacher who has always had very strong interest and care for the Special Ed students in my room, i can testify to how far things have come. And yet...those brave kids still have to go to separate rooms sometimes for tests, have different levels of attention, and other things that differentiate them from their peers. All of which they absolutely need. But in an adolescent world that mostly still values conformity over sameness, I know that they suffer from their peers, still. I am fortunate to work in a school where they aren't punched in the face. But I don't think it is easy, even now, even with the compassion and care so many educators like me bring, for those wonderful kids. i wish I had been there. It is hard to understand how Mr. Max's treatment could stand, even in the benighted 70s.
12
Josh Max asks a profound question about special education - did it help or did it hurt the student. After reading Mr. Max's account, I am tempted to suggest the question is too broad, and as a result, one can answer with both a "yes" and a "no." "No," special education appears not to have helped him academically, and it might even have hurt him, by not stressing academics for three years. However, "yes," it helped this particular student in an emotional breakthrough in which he experienced acceptance, care, and love from both peers and adults. It also apparently helped instill in the student self control. Those two lessons were extremely important for him to learn as he prepared himself to enter adulthood.
All in all, I would say he did well with his education, learning that which was most important to him. Good job, Mr. Max!
All in all, I would say he did well with his education, learning that which was most important to him. Good job, Mr. Max!
13
My mother was a Special Ed teacher in the pubic school system in Harrisburg in the 50's and 60's in Harrisburg PA, and she was one of the fiercest advocates for fighting tooth and nail for every one of her beloved students, seeing them as individuals (in junior and senior high) who each had shining capabilities. She would get after school jobs for some, or little advancements in other ways, and even as young as I was the, I recognized how 'special' she thought those kids were and how much she loved them, and how much they loved her too. God bless the Special Ed teachers like my mom.
43
Wonderful story!
I just heard Daniel J. Siegel , MD from UCLA who is a brain researcher speak about his new book
Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain (New York: Penguin Putnam, 2013). He spoke about the importance of giving adolescents hope that they can achieve and excel rather than classify them as special ed, failures, etc.
ADHD is a result of an immature pre-frontal cortex which some children grow out of, while others have it lifelong as adults.
Siegel showed several MRIs of teen's brains and the difference "exercising" the brain can make for teens by growing the pre-frontal cortex. According to Wikipedia, Siegel is known as a mindfulness expert and for his work developing the field of Interpersonal Neurobiology, which is an interdisciplinary view of life experience that draws on over a dozen branches of science to create a framework for understanding of our subjective and interpersonal lives.
Siegel's most recent work integrates the theories of Interpersonal Neurobiology with the theories of Mindfulness Practice and proposes that mindfulness practice is a highly developed process of both inter and intra personal attunement. He has led several clinical studies to show the value of mindfulness and how it results in growing the pre-frontal cortex.
I just heard Daniel J. Siegel , MD from UCLA who is a brain researcher speak about his new book
Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain (New York: Penguin Putnam, 2013). He spoke about the importance of giving adolescents hope that they can achieve and excel rather than classify them as special ed, failures, etc.
ADHD is a result of an immature pre-frontal cortex which some children grow out of, while others have it lifelong as adults.
Siegel showed several MRIs of teen's brains and the difference "exercising" the brain can make for teens by growing the pre-frontal cortex. According to Wikipedia, Siegel is known as a mindfulness expert and for his work developing the field of Interpersonal Neurobiology, which is an interdisciplinary view of life experience that draws on over a dozen branches of science to create a framework for understanding of our subjective and interpersonal lives.
Siegel's most recent work integrates the theories of Interpersonal Neurobiology with the theories of Mindfulness Practice and proposes that mindfulness practice is a highly developed process of both inter and intra personal attunement. He has led several clinical studies to show the value of mindfulness and how it results in growing the pre-frontal cortex.
3
Suggest you try Leonard Sax's "Boys Adrift," which addresses the issues of young men who end up 25 years old in parents' basements - due to a synergistic combination of ADHD medications (for "soft," prejudiced indications), video games, mixed boy/girl classrooms, etc. http://www.boysadrift.com/
"Excellent and informative references and information are provided . . . Powerfully and persuasively presented.”
— The Journal of the American Medical Association
"Excellent and informative references and information are provided . . . Powerfully and persuasively presented.”
— The Journal of the American Medical Association
Sadly, and all to often, the 'special education' program has become a money grab for many school districts. Once the child gets the label of 'special ed student', the child will mostly likely become eligible and get SSI payments from the Federal government. So, there is an incentive to get into special ed. In most urban school districts in New Jersey high proportions of students are in the program. One district, Elizabeth, has over 25% of its kids in the special education program. Over 40% of the Elizabeth school budget comes from Federal special education funds. Show me the money!
2
The fact that your response to Mr. Max's story runs immediately to the question of money makes me think you missed the entire point of the piece. And of education itself. The conditions of public education are ultimately imposed by a variety of stakeholders, yourself and myself included. But they are, in the end, imposed upon the children, the young human beings of our society. Try to keep them in your calculation.
As for this money grab you mention: What do you think the money is being used for, yachts, ice cream with chocolate sprinkles, luxuries and other non-essential items? I'm pretty sure it is being used to provide the multitude of special materials and programming needed to educate children with a wide variety of needs and abilities. As for the SSI payments that go to some families, that money obviously does not end up in the inflated bank account of the Elizabeth school district. It helps those families to deal with unforeseen costs associated with raising special needs children.
As for this money grab you mention: What do you think the money is being used for, yachts, ice cream with chocolate sprinkles, luxuries and other non-essential items? I'm pretty sure it is being used to provide the multitude of special materials and programming needed to educate children with a wide variety of needs and abilities. As for the SSI payments that go to some families, that money obviously does not end up in the inflated bank account of the Elizabeth school district. It helps those families to deal with unforeseen costs associated with raising special needs children.
1
For better or for worse, which is really the question that haunts you, can be answered this way, I think. Special Education classes serve the needs of more than just the student singled out to attend them. For one thing, they remove disruptive kids from classrooms where they interfere with the other students' ability to learn, and their teacher's performance overall. For another thing, they add government money (taxpayer's) to the school system and create jobs for special instructors and classrooms. Whether the classes help the chosen students depends on the quality of their Special Education and the individual student's desire and capacity to change his/her behavior. Even if you would have "turned out" okay without the Special Classes, others benefited from your having to take them. Of course, you will never know the answer to your question, but if you think about it, none of us knows for sure how much others have made us what we've become, and how much we ourselves had to do with it. My guess is that that is probably a good thing.
Their is always plenty of blame to go around.
Their is always plenty of blame to go around.
30
My husband worked briefly at an 'alternative' school, set up in a derelict building with tiny, windowless rooms. He and eight kids were packed in one of the closet-sized spaces. All eight of the needed special attention and care; accomplishing any 'teaching' was nigh impossible, these children needed counseling and support systems. One child arrived crying everyday, he said his mom cussed him every morning. I have never gotten over learning about the horrible way we treat 'special needs' children. Thanks for the story.
10
That wasn't the failure of the school system - it was the failure of the parents. Instead of enabling parents who abuse their children to the point the kid ends of in special ed for behavior problems we should be telling those parents the truth - "You wrecked your kid!" Instead we give the abusive/neglectful parents some psych labels they can hide behind and either route the kid into special ed or let him/her loose in a mainstream classroom where they terrorize and traumatize the other children.
The last paragraph or two, implying that blaming is a mental illness is false. Generally, those that were born privileged, the ones with the greatest assistance from society in life, tend to believe life is under their control*. Conversely, those who are born into bad situations and prospects might feel that the 'game of life' is rigged against them. Which sentiment is false, both, neither?
*Born on third place and believes he hit a triple.
*Born on third place and believes he hit a triple.
2
Josh--thanks for sharing this. Your experience validates the power of compassion. Special Education students in the 60s and 70s (when I grew up) were sequestered from the general population. Thanks to some thoughtful educators and legislators, sequestration became inclusion. I'm a teacher now, and I see how my students with learning disabilities thrive when integrated with the general population. The three guitars in my class may have something to do with it! Rock on, Josh.
21
There are instances where 'special education' is necessary. However, many children could be easily mainstreamed if parents would play a greater supervisory role in their education. Children need to be aware of their boundries and responsibilities. Reasonable educational goals with a definite minimum level of acceptability must be made clear to the child, parent and teacher. Ultimately, the parent is forced to put in some extra effort, but the rewards far outweigh the inconvenience. And, to see the look of accomplishment on a child's face is worth everything.
12
What a broad statement. Gosh, if only those parents would straighten out! SpEd populations vary tremendously among districts. Two of my three put in a total of 20yrs in '90's-'00's SpEd in our affluent suburban town. In all that time I never met a single family where lack of parental supervisory role, specifically failure to set clear boundaries & responsibilities etc figured into the picture. Most erred in the opposite direction. On the other hand, I had to work constantly with mainstream teachers [which is where SpEd kids are except 40mins Resource Room] to establish 'reasonable educational goals w/a definite minimum level of acceptibility'-- otherwise assnts which took my kid 2 hrs (& others 1/2hr) would never get pared back. Forget about differentiated instruction (haha). My kids leaped ahead when I insisted on a couple of yrs of "self-contained classroom" in hs-- which is nothing other than tiny classes, manageable for one excellent generalist who has 6 or 8 diff LD-types to deal with.
The ed I got in the '50's in small, 2-or-more-grades-per-room rural elementary schools-- on the outskirts of a university town-- was superior when it comes to educating kids w/hi IQ but slow output, dyslexic, & similar. Small total classroom sizes, broken down into smaller work groups. Lots of recess for the obstreperous. Lots of 1-on-1 w/teacher time. There was no 'norm'; 25 kids in 2 grades included everybody from professor's kids to Appalachian immigrants. Eccentricity expected.
The ed I got in the '50's in small, 2-or-more-grades-per-room rural elementary schools-- on the outskirts of a university town-- was superior when it comes to educating kids w/hi IQ but slow output, dyslexic, & similar. Small total classroom sizes, broken down into smaller work groups. Lots of recess for the obstreperous. Lots of 1-on-1 w/teacher time. There was no 'norm'; 25 kids in 2 grades included everybody from professor's kids to Appalachian immigrants. Eccentricity expected.
7
The sad reality is that unless parents know how to advocate for their child, they don't know how to insist on "least restrictive environment" and that teachers stretch their methods to reach more students. In my middle school teaching years, I saw too many children who had been shunted aside while in elementary school and got stuck in a special ed track. Read: lowered expectations. Imagine if Josh had found his voice earlier.
19
What a moving story! Certainly more than a vignette about a boy in special ed - although at its' core a lesson for us in that realm of education - Josh has written a reminder to all of us how compassion, caring and love for each other is how we should move about this earth, making a difference in everyone's lives with the little things we do for each other. It is also a reminder that psychology often bogs down in itself, forgetting to connect with the individual, leaving the child or adult in the lurch. Thanks for sharing!
29
My older brother, who is now 70 years old, and who was very bright but autistic, was forced to attend "special ed" in the early 1950's - 1960's until he was expelled from school for simply being "too odd". Special education at that time was, basically, a repository for kids who did not fit into the established school norms. At that time there were no IEP programs, no Americans with Disabilities Act, no concern or recourse for children with various forms of psychiatric disability and parents were blamed and excluded. Schools did not want to deal with such children and adolescents and did not care much about what happened during the special education school day. Thank goodness things have changed for the better and children such as the author, Josh Max, and my brother would have benefited immensely had they had access to the more progressive options available today.
21
Josh, you've obviously healed and done well. So look at Special Ed as a gift. We all have had challenges and bear scars, and you have dealt masterfully with yours-- witness this column. Kudos.
56
You made me cry.
Our daughter was diagnosed with ADHD at age four. The psychologist, one of whose twin daughters had severe Autism, explained she gave that diagnosis because no child should be saddled with the Autism label. But our daughter had Autism and hers came with both blessings and deficits. While she began teaching herself to read before age two, she spoke in full sentences well after age 3. Thus, we began our own journey with Special Ed and, save for a very brief period, what was offered was inappropriate for her. By the time she was six, we decided to home school and we never looked back. Epilepsy happened when she was eight, in the middle of a week day. She would have had her first seizure in the lunchroom or playground had she been in school. She's in college now.
Disability comes in all shapes and sizes, with all kinds of needs. All too many kids who are deemed disabled are also very bright, like you. The one size fits all approach of Special Ed fails all too many kids, and fools all too many parents into a false sense of security that their child is receiving the appropriate care and education, and that their child was properly labeled.
Doing what we did came at a great sacrifice. We had no idea what life would bring. Life brought the tech bubble and the Great Recession. But as hard as it has been, there is no greater joy than to see my child knock off milestone after milestone.
Oh, and Max? She was stone-faced in baby pictures. She smiles now.
With love
Our daughter was diagnosed with ADHD at age four. The psychologist, one of whose twin daughters had severe Autism, explained she gave that diagnosis because no child should be saddled with the Autism label. But our daughter had Autism and hers came with both blessings and deficits. While she began teaching herself to read before age two, she spoke in full sentences well after age 3. Thus, we began our own journey with Special Ed and, save for a very brief period, what was offered was inappropriate for her. By the time she was six, we decided to home school and we never looked back. Epilepsy happened when she was eight, in the middle of a week day. She would have had her first seizure in the lunchroom or playground had she been in school. She's in college now.
Disability comes in all shapes and sizes, with all kinds of needs. All too many kids who are deemed disabled are also very bright, like you. The one size fits all approach of Special Ed fails all too many kids, and fools all too many parents into a false sense of security that their child is receiving the appropriate care and education, and that their child was properly labeled.
Doing what we did came at a great sacrifice. We had no idea what life would bring. Life brought the tech bubble and the Great Recession. But as hard as it has been, there is no greater joy than to see my child knock off milestone after milestone.
Oh, and Max? She was stone-faced in baby pictures. She smiles now.
With love
153
Our story: A stroke of lightning and a gift
http://www.rimaregas.com/2014/10/personal-blog-a-stroke-of-lightning-and...
http://www.rimaregas.com/2014/10/personal-blog-a-stroke-of-lightning-and...
6
Congratulations, Rima, to your daughter and your family.
19
What does this have to do with Josh or his educational history? He can't turn back time and be home-schooled, nor is it obvious that that would be a good solution for him. He doesn't seem to have autism.
Rima's experience bundles together the two most popular answers to what to do with children whose behavior falls outside proscribed lines:
1. Diagnose the child, either by a physician or by lay dianosers as being on the autism spectrum.
2. Turn to home schooling.
According to increasing numbers of reports, autism is being grossly diagnosed and used as a catch-all for all sorts of physiological and social variations. Let's be wary of throwing this diagnosis around, especially about people we don't know.
And home-schooling is hardly a panacea. Not all parents have the time or skills to home skill, educational outcome from home schooling varies greatly, and some children actually benefit more from attending a school with other children.
Rima's experience bundles together the two most popular answers to what to do with children whose behavior falls outside proscribed lines:
1. Diagnose the child, either by a physician or by lay dianosers as being on the autism spectrum.
2. Turn to home schooling.
According to increasing numbers of reports, autism is being grossly diagnosed and used as a catch-all for all sorts of physiological and social variations. Let's be wary of throwing this diagnosis around, especially about people we don't know.
And home-schooling is hardly a panacea. Not all parents have the time or skills to home skill, educational outcome from home schooling varies greatly, and some children actually benefit more from attending a school with other children.
13
Josh Max writes that he quickly learned to tone down his outbursts, "purely for tactical reasons."
Well, I'd love to know whether he was told to knock it off firmly when he misbehaved earlier, before he was relegated to "special ed."
My guess is that if he had been in the presence of the nuns that taught me in first and second grade, he would have shaped up quick, and would not have ended up in "special ed." Could the author please comment?