Gail, I know why you really came back. The republican candidates offer priceless material for commentary.
30
Thank God you are back, Gail! You always have the pitch perfect response to the GOP circus.
48
Welcome Back, missed you!
50
All I can say is that if Hillary - (or Joe) runs and doesn't win, we are in big trouble, America.
69
Don't forget The Ted and Mike show, starring Kim Davis! And, heeeeere she is! Honestly, what else can we say about this bunch of miscreants? You've said it all! But, just wait, every one of them will come up with some other laughable stunt, still without a plan or a platform. Then, Ms. Collins can write another of her brilliant columns. Can't wait for it. On a brighter note, I'm really not bothered by the email thing, or the socialist thing. At least, Clinton and Sanders are actually talking about real issues, that most of the public cares about.
59
Gail,
Welcome back!! What fun this will be.
Welcome back!! What fun this will be.
20
Gail Collins, I missed you! And apparently so did the presidential candidates, they've been vying for top clown in your column for months. Your columns, with their humor and common sense, are better than blood pressure medication for those of us who can't believe the political state we're in.
46
How about Carly Fiorina as the Republican candidate vs. Hillary Clinton as the Democratic candidate? Then we would be guaranteed a woman President!
6
Welcome back!!! We cannot have a presidential election without your excellent analysis!!!
26
Yes, they are all cheats.
4
Bump Ted Cruz. Trump can speak for Ted, and do it in a more entertaining way. Anyway, Ted’s going to be busy with the government shutdown that his fellow Republicans are so excited about.
18
It's Christmas in September!
Welcome back, Gail Collins.
So many loonies,…so much time. You'll make a year's worth of endless campaign sound bites bearable.
Welcome back, Gail Collins.
So many loonies,…so much time. You'll make a year's worth of endless campaign sound bites bearable.
24
glad you're back gail! hey, does Christie's appointee live next door to mark "Appalachian trail" Sanford?
7
Your assessment of Ben Carson is spot on. He's only to happy to answer questions about his faith. But the following discussion seems to be missed by everyone but you. Evolution is not a theory any more than the germ theory is not a theory. Both are settled science. Dr. Carson undoubtedly prescribed antibiotics as a surgeon. The use of this type of drug requires an understanding of evolution since resistant bacteria occur through an evolutionary process. Therefore, how does he claim to not "believe" in evolution when his professional life belies that fact?
60
Too bad Ben Carson isn't a transplant surgeon. Donald Trump (and a few others) could use a brain transplant.
14
What a dull summer it's been without you! Hope you had a great
vacation and are ready with fresh observations about all these
people who think they know more than you.
vacation and are ready with fresh observations about all these
people who think they know more than you.
14
Just in the nick of time, "Alice", you have returned to Wonderland to guide us on the journey down the rabbit hole peeking behind curtains, knocking on doors where there is no ceiling and there is no floor. Welcome Back!
20
Thanks Gail. We need your insightful humor during these crazy times. Welcome back!
16
Gail, it's good to have you back. Now I don't have to cancel my NYT subscription!
7
Is it ever good to have you back!
6
Nobody can trumpet about Trump's triumphs like you. Giddy with glee and glad you're back Gail.
5
Reading your column sure vindicates Rush Limbaugh's
comment, "Republicans were not elected to govern!"
comment, "Republicans were not elected to govern!"
10
"But Carson really doesn’t believe in evolution. And he is, you know, a scientist."
BTW, for those that might be interested, I found out what happened to the dinosaurs... They didn't make it onto Noah Ark and were all drownded
BTW, for those that might be interested, I found out what happened to the dinosaurs... They didn't make it onto Noah Ark and were all drownded
16
The fact that Ben Carson is a Republican candidate for president is proof of evolution.
3
gail is back! hip hip hooray!!!
6
Yay, you're back! I admire your discipline - there must have been many times over the summer that you wanted to write your column and thought, I can write my book any old time! What I want to know is, did you ever think, even fleetingly, that perhaps the Democrats did secretly get Trump to run as a Republican to destroy the GOP? I'm usually quite anti-conspiracy, but every now and then I think, maybe in this case, I'm wrong.
9
Trump's experience in marketing luxury real estate would give him the edge in selling the White House.
28
I thought the Republican party went insane when Sarah Palin was on their ticket. But, maybe, it was just an unfortunate misstep. Now, seeing the present presidential contenders, I am convinced! Vote for sanity and Bernie Sanders!
22
I am not going to comment on this preferring to go sit in the corner an cry over the disappearing election process of a great country.
12
With each passing day, Republicans are giving us a new definition of what it means for America to be so "exceptional." What other industrialized country would have on offer, for the highest office in the land, the likes of Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Mike Huckabee, Carly Fiorina, Chris Christie, Ben Carrson et al? In what other country would the person leading the pack be a racist, bigoted, xenophobic, blowhard whose claim to fame is that he insults, insults, and insults anyone who deigns to disagree with him, or who calls him out for his insults? And in what other industrialized country would his followers be praising him for "telling it like it is," when he is actually "telling it like they want to think it is."
Gail, you captured perfectly the actors in the Republican Theater of the Absurd. Act one was the birther nonsense. Act two is the ant-immigration rhetoric. Are we seeing the Off Broadway version of this play, or has it now moved to the Big Time?
Gail, you captured perfectly the actors in the Republican Theater of the Absurd. Act one was the birther nonsense. Act two is the ant-immigration rhetoric. Are we seeing the Off Broadway version of this play, or has it now moved to the Big Time?
24
Gail, you owe these bozos a great deal of gratitude. They are such a laughingstock. You hardly need to work.
But I digress.
I struggle to understand why any woman would support any Republican. Between their collective stance(s) on hating Planned Parenthood and denying global warming (threatening a woman's children), what is in it for women? Just don't get it.
But I digress.
I struggle to understand why any woman would support any Republican. Between their collective stance(s) on hating Planned Parenthood and denying global warming (threatening a woman's children), what is in it for women? Just don't get it.
34
In other words a disappointing lineup of losers and liars. Might as well ask Dick Cheney to run.
8
Great to see your column again. I always enjoy it and learn something new. Didn't know Jeb! was really a John. Not that it probably matters as he seems to be fading fast.
9
You're back! Enough of this book-writing stuff & vacation. There's an election going on. And on. And on. . . .
20
Now that Gail is back I will keep up my subscription.
Saying that, we really could use some stories on Bernie Sanders.
He will not go away, no matter what the main stream press wishes, or thinks.
Saying that, we really could use some stories on Bernie Sanders.
He will not go away, no matter what the main stream press wishes, or thinks.
42
Sorry, but I'm badly out of sync with the Times' coverage of this election so far. To me it looks like a party that represents tens of millions of Americans and has served as a pillar of our republic has devolved into a dangerous mob. It looks like their candidates are explicitly running against the Constitution they say they want to preserve. It looks like their voters are spoiling for an excuse to separate from the body politic, overthrow standing law, and even kill other Americans.
Op-Eds like this suggest however that all that is just the amusing eccentricity of those funny bohunks who don't read the Times. Ms. Collins here sees it as cute (!), impish, worthy of a knowing chuckle and a bon mot. Oh those Trump rallies and their guns. Aren't those people just so silly?
I think I’m correct about this, and that you are not. I’m appalled at how insular the Times has become.
Op-Eds like this suggest however that all that is just the amusing eccentricity of those funny bohunks who don't read the Times. Ms. Collins here sees it as cute (!), impish, worthy of a knowing chuckle and a bon mot. Oh those Trump rallies and their guns. Aren't those people just so silly?
I think I’m correct about this, and that you are not. I’m appalled at how insular the Times has become.
9
I apologize for this double submission but the addition of 10 words at the end make it much better.
------------------------------------------
Dr. Ben Carson scientist?
There are three basic roles in the creation of the artifacts of our civilization: scientists, engineers and technicians. Of course there is lots of overlap and cooperation among them and some individuals perform in two or all three roles.
Scientists are trained to discover the laws of nature and biology; engineers are trained to use these discoveries to make useful things, like computers, space ships and miracle drugs; technicians are trained to keep these things running and to fix them when they break down.
Doctors, however well trained, are technicians. Belief in silly things like Creationism has no effect on their performance as technicians; it would seriously affect their performance in office.
------------------------------------------
Dr. Ben Carson scientist?
There are three basic roles in the creation of the artifacts of our civilization: scientists, engineers and technicians. Of course there is lots of overlap and cooperation among them and some individuals perform in two or all three roles.
Scientists are trained to discover the laws of nature and biology; engineers are trained to use these discoveries to make useful things, like computers, space ships and miracle drugs; technicians are trained to keep these things running and to fix them when they break down.
Doctors, however well trained, are technicians. Belief in silly things like Creationism has no effect on their performance as technicians; it would seriously affect their performance in office.
24
Homer Simpson throws his hat in the ring. Say what, Tom Brady?
1
Gail, so glad you are back. I missed your pithy commentary. Great column.
5
And there was no need to even comment on our Kentucky Senator Rand Paul. That, in itself, is great news!
6
Welcome back.
5
No wonder our kids' science and math rankings are terrible.
A good chunk of our leadership (who are supposed to be a reflection of the voters) don't quite believe in Math (remember the "magic asterisk" in supply side "trust us" budget balancing), climate change, evolution/creationism.......
A good chunk of our leadership (who are supposed to be a reflection of the voters) don't quite believe in Math (remember the "magic asterisk" in supply side "trust us" budget balancing), climate change, evolution/creationism.......
12
Ms. Collins ends her column with a reference to "President Newt Gingrich." That phrase used to scare me. Now it just makes me laugh. Thank you, Ms. Collins. Now, I just wish she could ease my fear of the 16 passengers squashed into the Republican presidential candidates' clown car.
4
This is the party that wants to govern America!! Anyway, welcome back, Ms Collins. Only you can make sense of these people.
8
I am so glad you are back from vacation Gail, I adore your columns and look forward to them each week
6
I'm so happy that you're back. Now, at least, I can actually smile sometimes about politics, particularly the republican's comic relief?
9
We Dems are just enthralled with the 2016 model of the GOP Clown Car. It's cruising for a bruising come next November.
George Walker Bush wanted to be known as Dubya. John Ellis Bush wants to be known as JEB!. What gives with these Bushes. None of them wants to sound too high falutin' for the common people? They'd prefer to dumb-down their name to capture the ignorant vote, which fits the Republican voter to a tee.
With JEB! representing a moderate Republican of this Magnificent Seventeen, a group so large it takes two stages to accommodate them, you would think they could manage to produce someone of enlightenment. Instead of the cream rising to the top, the crazies, mavericks, outsiders, are emerging as the faves of the GOP masses. Maybe one can't blame the candidates. When one looks at the mindset of the disillusioned folks who are supporting them - Angry, fearful, rapidly aging whites who bemoan losing "their" country - they are completely unaware America has always been a work in progress, changing with every generation.
But whose gonna tell 'em the truth? Not Right-wing radio conspiracy nuts that's for sure. Fear brings ratings.
But for Dems, 2016 shapes up to be one of the most hilarious campaigns to come down the pike in eons. Hillary, even while dragging Benghasi, her e-mails and a host of conjured Clinton conspiracies baggage in tow, will cross the 2016 finish line with ease, and a smile.
DD
Manhattan
George Walker Bush wanted to be known as Dubya. John Ellis Bush wants to be known as JEB!. What gives with these Bushes. None of them wants to sound too high falutin' for the common people? They'd prefer to dumb-down their name to capture the ignorant vote, which fits the Republican voter to a tee.
With JEB! representing a moderate Republican of this Magnificent Seventeen, a group so large it takes two stages to accommodate them, you would think they could manage to produce someone of enlightenment. Instead of the cream rising to the top, the crazies, mavericks, outsiders, are emerging as the faves of the GOP masses. Maybe one can't blame the candidates. When one looks at the mindset of the disillusioned folks who are supporting them - Angry, fearful, rapidly aging whites who bemoan losing "their" country - they are completely unaware America has always been a work in progress, changing with every generation.
But whose gonna tell 'em the truth? Not Right-wing radio conspiracy nuts that's for sure. Fear brings ratings.
But for Dems, 2016 shapes up to be one of the most hilarious campaigns to come down the pike in eons. Hillary, even while dragging Benghasi, her e-mails and a host of conjured Clinton conspiracies baggage in tow, will cross the 2016 finish line with ease, and a smile.
DD
Manhattan
7
Thank goodness you're back, Gail! Thursdays and Saturdays haven't been the same for too long!
10
Can you imagine Trump at Yalta or Munich with Chamberlain? Maybe Wharton has a department of Political Science that has been undiscovered. Someone needs to explain to him that international government relations at its most basic is about power /interest and not profit. This is no "winner winner chicken dinner" game.He thinks it's poker and while he may have a royal flush , he'll be checkmated without knowing it.
8
Ted Cruz has been on public radio a lot lately. So has Huckabee but his fifteen minutes smells like burned squirrel so it's easy to ignore him. But Cruz is weird & it's difficult to ignore his whiney voice.
Really difficult. He says things like "the blood will be on your hands" you Democrats. Which is bizarre since it's Republicans who start wars for no reason, and attack the wrong countries. Who would believe him when he sounds almost hysterical?
And Carson? A surgeon isn't a scientist. I studied Aquatic Bio & the classes were full of premeds who scored high but couldn't design an experiment & didn't understand the fundamentals of science. It used to annoy me but now I just avoid doctors. When I was partially disabled they told me I'd never scuba dive again. Then I went on to work underwater for twenty more years.
I suspect Carson is really good at putting down really lazy people but how much competition can a guy who separates conjoined twins have? Specialize in an area where there's no competition & you're the expert after one success.
Really difficult. He says things like "the blood will be on your hands" you Democrats. Which is bizarre since it's Republicans who start wars for no reason, and attack the wrong countries. Who would believe him when he sounds almost hysterical?
And Carson? A surgeon isn't a scientist. I studied Aquatic Bio & the classes were full of premeds who scored high but couldn't design an experiment & didn't understand the fundamentals of science. It used to annoy me but now I just avoid doctors. When I was partially disabled they told me I'd never scuba dive again. Then I went on to work underwater for twenty more years.
I suspect Carson is really good at putting down really lazy people but how much competition can a guy who separates conjoined twins have? Specialize in an area where there's no competition & you're the expert after one success.
15
I don't care what Ben Carson believes in or not. He is brilliant, smart, well-spoken, calm and thinks before he speaks or acts. That is not what we can say about Mrs. Clinton. As for Mr. Sanders; he is a socialist and an idealist not a realist.
1
Dr. Ben Carson scientist?
There are three basic roles in the creation of the artifacts of our civilization: scientists, engineers and technicians. Of course there is lots of overlap and cooperation among them and some individuals perform in two or all three roles
Scientists are trained to discover the laws of nature and biology; engineers are trained to use these discoveries to make useful things, like computers, spaceships and miracle drugs; technicians are trained to keep these things running and to fix them when they break down.
Doctors, however well trained, are technicians. Belief in silly things like Creationism has no effect on their performance.
There are three basic roles in the creation of the artifacts of our civilization: scientists, engineers and technicians. Of course there is lots of overlap and cooperation among them and some individuals perform in two or all three roles
Scientists are trained to discover the laws of nature and biology; engineers are trained to use these discoveries to make useful things, like computers, spaceships and miracle drugs; technicians are trained to keep these things running and to fix them when they break down.
Doctors, however well trained, are technicians. Belief in silly things like Creationism has no effect on their performance.
28
Welcome back! We anxiously await your Pets of the Candidates roundup and analysis.
6
Evolution denier?
Well, I guess you could learn the science and physical dexterity necessary to become a successful neurosurgeon awhile compartmentalizing and denying what your peers consider to be the undeniable body of scientific evidence for evolution...buy why would you? Unnerving is right. As was the length of that sentence.
Well, I guess you could learn the science and physical dexterity necessary to become a successful neurosurgeon awhile compartmentalizing and denying what your peers consider to be the undeniable body of scientific evidence for evolution...buy why would you? Unnerving is right. As was the length of that sentence.
10
Thank you for making the election season more bearable.
4
Welcome back, Gail. We missed you. Lots of good stuff here. I was especially moved by the news that Mike Huckabee voluntarily gave up his one and only heart for a higher cause; his own campaign. That seems to be working well.
I wonder who the lucky transplant recipient was?
www.endthemadnessnow.org
I wonder who the lucky transplant recipient was?
www.endthemadnessnow.org
5
Welcome back Gail you were missed.
4
Gail, where were you? Thank God you're back. Call in the clowns! Wait, they're already here.
5
Gail, It's great to see you back! When does the book come out? Don't let the Dems off the hook, plenty of good material there as well.
3
Welcome back Gail, missed your column.
2
Oh yuck!
1
Gail, where have you been? No one calls out the Repubs like you do. xo
1
Looking forward to the same snark applied to the Democratic field.
Gail, you didn't mention Lindsey Graham. He's done stuff this summer. I don't know what stuff particularly, but I'm pretty sure it's good stuff.
4
Ms. Collins:
Glad to see your byline again. However, I wish you could put some perspective
on more serious topics, like the Sanders campaign. As you point out, there is nothing new under the Republican sun.
Glad to see your byline again. However, I wish you could put some perspective
on more serious topics, like the Sanders campaign. As you point out, there is nothing new under the Republican sun.
6
Ben Carson is no "Scientist" he's a doctor. I'm tired of the "I'm no scientist" line.
3
Great column! And yet the rest of this newspaper is totally obsessed with how disastrous an email server is for Hillary Clinton.
You don't see or hear Republicans jumping all over their candidates for the nonsense as described in this column (sure, they bash each other but that is to be expected; they're not Democratic candidates after all.)
But on the Democratic side, the voter says let's do all we can to screw up a sure thing because she is cold, calculating, political and concerned too much with policy and she doesn't give me a tingle in my leg.
You don't see or hear Republicans jumping all over their candidates for the nonsense as described in this column (sure, they bash each other but that is to be expected; they're not Democratic candidates after all.)
But on the Democratic side, the voter says let's do all we can to screw up a sure thing because she is cold, calculating, political and concerned too much with policy and she doesn't give me a tingle in my leg.
9
A choice at election time I would like to have:
Democrat: Biden/Warren
Republican: Kasich
Sadly, I don't think either party is smart enough to do this.
Democrat: Biden/Warren
Republican: Kasich
Sadly, I don't think either party is smart enough to do this.
2
No matter how short the video you see of Mike Huckabee at the Kim Davis rally, he is gently wiping tears from his eyes- it was like he had stuck habanero sauce on his finger and then the croc tears doth flowed. The guy is clearly hoping to fill a religious niche, not seriously run for President. Clutching Kim for a lingering hug gave his crew time to give old Ted the down south icebox treatment in the back of the revival tent. Huck has needed an image/judgment reboot after championing Mr. Duggar who was again disgraced, lately for his porn addiction and marriage woes. New martyr = clean slate and fresh catnip.
The mission for the GOP seems to be to find a pilot who cannot fly the plane because someone who knows how would be an "insider". But where does that leave Ted Cruz or Scott Walker, both raised at the demon tit of the Republican party? I guess the old "statesman" idea is completely banished at this point.
The mission for the GOP seems to be to find a pilot who cannot fly the plane because someone who knows how would be an "insider". But where does that leave Ted Cruz or Scott Walker, both raised at the demon tit of the Republican party? I guess the old "statesman" idea is completely banished at this point.
14
I join the crowd in welcoming you back, Gail. You've been sorely missed, and we've had to turn to old SNL and Jon Stewart videos to stave off the withdrawal. Good, but hardly a replacement for the twice-weekly food for the soul you provide.
The other day I believe I saw a little announcement on the TV that Kanye West was running. Not sure which party. Did you forget him? Or was that just a dream I had? I mean, Kim Kardashian as First Lady? If this is true, it seems to fill in some missing piece we had. You know, the Hollywood celebrity turned politician?
The other day I believe I saw a little announcement on the TV that Kanye West was running. Not sure which party. Did you forget him? Or was that just a dream I had? I mean, Kim Kardashian as First Lady? If this is true, it seems to fill in some missing piece we had. You know, the Hollywood celebrity turned politician?
4
Yes Gail—there will never be a lack of good material with a crowd like this. They are the gift that keeps on giving.
2
Thank god your back. I've been desperately scanning the pages for what seems like months now. A genuine relief you are back! Now, no more time off until after the 2016 elections. We won't make it through them without you...
5
Gail is back. Let the games begin.
3
The sensible one is back her name is Gail Collins !
Now let`s read an impartial ( to a certain extent) column on Hillary R. Clinton.
The other columnist`s name I won`t mention who always seems to have an ax to grind.
There I said it.
Now let`s read an impartial ( to a certain extent) column on Hillary R. Clinton.
The other columnist`s name I won`t mention who always seems to have an ax to grind.
There I said it.
2
Oh thank goodness you're back. Election season is upon us and we need a little humor. It's going to be a long, long slog to the 2016 election. I'm already sick of it and there's more than a year to go. Keep poking fun at them because they all take themselves far too seriously.
4
Scott Walker reminded me of a friend's exasperated answer to her young son's umpteenth question: "A miracle is something that never happened." Like one of these GOP candidates getting elected president.
We get something from watching the Republican debates. We won't need a scorecard when Fox cable news announces its next crop of pundits.
It is great to have you back, Gail! I look forward to your thoughts after next week's momentous clash of Titans!
1
I look forward to Gail's column on the other side. We have a liar, cheat, .1%er who "feels" the pain of the poor and understands womens issues-provided they are not one of the hundreds who have dallied with her own hubby.
We have an "outsider" soicalist who having been in elected office for 30+ years knows how to fix things by blaming the rich and expanding the government.
Let's not forget that crazy uncle "stand-up" who is about as bright as a nightlight and suggests his wife fire the double barrel shotgun through the door at intruders.
We have an "outsider" soicalist who having been in elected office for 30+ years knows how to fix things by blaming the rich and expanding the government.
Let's not forget that crazy uncle "stand-up" who is about as bright as a nightlight and suggests his wife fire the double barrel shotgun through the door at intruders.
Thank you. What a style!
2
So happy you are back, Gail! Honestly, without the humor you are able to bring to this horror, I believe it could drive a person mad. Your column is the first one I turn to, and you never disappoint. Please, do not take any more time off until after President Clinton is inaugurated. She should make your job a whole lot easier and help restore the country to sanity as she schools the Republican children in Congress. But, until then . . .
4
First of all, physicians are not scientists (most of them anyway) - more like technicians.
Second, four months away from the Iowa caucuses, yes, but 15 months from the actual election. Far too early to worry about this. The Iowa caucuses are irrelevant anyway - certainly no guarantee of a nomination or winning the election!
So can't we all spend at least the next 6 months talking about something interesting and doing something productive rather than watching these clowns (although I admit, it is entertaining)?
Second, four months away from the Iowa caucuses, yes, but 15 months from the actual election. Far too early to worry about this. The Iowa caucuses are irrelevant anyway - certainly no guarantee of a nomination or winning the election!
So can't we all spend at least the next 6 months talking about something interesting and doing something productive rather than watching these clowns (although I admit, it is entertaining)?
7
Thanks for the humor, Gail. Your columns are always fun to read. We'd better enjoy it now, when no one's voting and the polls, candidates, and campaigns don't matter much. There's plenty to laugh at among the candidates, but the issues the country faces are drop-dead serious (literally, regarding Social Security, Medicare, ISIS, Iran, etc.).
8
Welcome back! I missed this wry sense of humor :-)
2
Gail Collins Column: better than a shot of bourbon with my morning coffee.
7
She's back! What a great column bringing the best sort of humor, the rib-tickling, true facts with just that little bit o'twist that makes these highlights on the GOP candidates ever-so-hysterical. Thanks for the update on Ben Carson; I just felt as Micheal from LA wrote that he had no biz being prez and to learn that he does not believer in evolution frankly stuns me. Watching Sarah Palin yesterday reminds one of the real embarrassment that could have been the nation's, not the mention the danger. But back to these guys and gals: gosh. Golly. Gee whiz.
6
The astonishing thing is that this whole gaggle of geese thinks the GOP nomination is worth winning.
5
Gail, This would be a really funny column if it wasn't so darn true!
7
What a challenge to list the republican candidates goings on this summer and limit it to just one short article. There have been so many good gaffes along the way. Good job though Gail.
3
It has been really difficult coping with a presidential race without your input! Nice to have someone back who can put things in perspective and show fools to be fools who deserve to be laughed at, which is what you do so well. Your challenge is to come up with something about what is on top of Donald Trump's head that will have the staying power of what was on top of Romney's car during the last election!
5
It's perfectly acceptable for candidates to have flaws, but the Republican clown van is occupied by those with really serious, dysfunctional, intellectually dishonest flaws. There is little to no evidence of abundant common sense and a firm grasp on reality. They are living proof of the inverse relationship between ideological purity and intelligence.
Eclectic Pragmatist — http://eclectic-pragmatist.tumblr.com/
Eclectic Pragmatist — https://medium.com/eclectic-pragmatism
Eclectic Pragmatist — http://eclectic-pragmatist.tumblr.com/
Eclectic Pragmatist — https://medium.com/eclectic-pragmatism
12
Gail
Another irrelevant column by you. I guess all of your childish taunts are suppose to obscure from the fact that Hillary Clinton is the subject of a criminal investigation by the FBI for violation of the Espionage Act? Yet all you seem to come up with is another column where you mock Republican candidates. But let's do a little recap shall we?
1) Hillary set up the server prior to taking office. But didn't she say that she used the one Bill set up as president?
2) March 11 press conference at the UN. Said she never sent or received classified emails over her server. How do you explain the email about North Korea or Tony Blair?
3) Why is it that Bill Clinton's office contradicted her regarding her claim they exchanged emails?
4) She refused to turn over the server repeatedly
5) Tell me Gail, the staff who helped go through the emails have the property security clearance?
6) Did David Kendall have the proper security clearance to be in possession of the thumb drive?
7) Can you explain to me how her server ended up in the bathroom closet of a mom and pop company that is no longer in business?
Can you also discuss the Clinton Foundation and the questionable means they raise money? How is it they "forgot" to list 1,000 donors? How is it they take millions of dollars from countries that have atrocious human rights records? Bill wanting to speak on Sudan? North Korea? Anything for a buck. They have been bought and sold many times over.
Another wasted column about nothing
Another irrelevant column by you. I guess all of your childish taunts are suppose to obscure from the fact that Hillary Clinton is the subject of a criminal investigation by the FBI for violation of the Espionage Act? Yet all you seem to come up with is another column where you mock Republican candidates. But let's do a little recap shall we?
1) Hillary set up the server prior to taking office. But didn't she say that she used the one Bill set up as president?
2) March 11 press conference at the UN. Said she never sent or received classified emails over her server. How do you explain the email about North Korea or Tony Blair?
3) Why is it that Bill Clinton's office contradicted her regarding her claim they exchanged emails?
4) She refused to turn over the server repeatedly
5) Tell me Gail, the staff who helped go through the emails have the property security clearance?
6) Did David Kendall have the proper security clearance to be in possession of the thumb drive?
7) Can you explain to me how her server ended up in the bathroom closet of a mom and pop company that is no longer in business?
Can you also discuss the Clinton Foundation and the questionable means they raise money? How is it they "forgot" to list 1,000 donors? How is it they take millions of dollars from countries that have atrocious human rights records? Bill wanting to speak on Sudan? North Korea? Anything for a buck. They have been bought and sold many times over.
Another wasted column about nothing
1
*Another wasted column about nothing
One could certainly argue the same thing about your comment. If you don't like Gail's column, why are you here? This column happens to be about the Republican candidates. You appear to be demanding that Gail write about what you want when you want it. Maybe you could write your own column and give Gail a chance. She normally skewers both Dems and Rs...just not all at once.
One could certainly argue the same thing about your comment. If you don't like Gail's column, why are you here? This column happens to be about the Republican candidates. You appear to be demanding that Gail write about what you want when you want it. Maybe you could write your own column and give Gail a chance. She normally skewers both Dems and Rs...just not all at once.
1
Gail, I'm so glad you're back! Now I can follow the Republican candidates without having to read anything that purports to be a serious article about them. Of course, this time none of them have driven to Canada with his dog on the roof of the car, but Trump looks like he has a dead animal glued to the top of his head, which is almost as gratifying.
18
A great article!!
5
Every candidate should be required to own an Irish Setter called Seamus. Gail's astute observations about how each candidate cared for his Seamus would sort out the field pretty quickly. I think the idea has legs.
3
Speaking of Rand Paul, is there anything more bizarre than a libertarian who doesn't believe in abortion rights? Is there such a thing as a "libertarian-but-only-for-men"?
383
Donald Trump has become "Professor Harold Hill" leader the Republican Parade going down the road to a deadend.
1
I think the most under-reported political story this summer surely has to be major remorse I have to believe Jon Stewart has to be feeling at announcing his retirement before how big of a clown car this election was going to produce.
We're talking pure comedy gold here.
Really, there may be TOO much material here.
From Jeb's idiotic exclamation point ("It's supposed to convey excitement") to Chris Christie's "plan" to track immigrants the way "Federal Express tracks packages" (Questions for the Gov of New Jersey: 1) Is your thinking we'll tattoo bar codes and/or numbers onto immigrants?, 2) Do you recall ever seeing photos of the numbers the Nazis tattooed on prisoners?)
We're talking pure comedy gold here.
Really, there may be TOO much material here.
From Jeb's idiotic exclamation point ("It's supposed to convey excitement") to Chris Christie's "plan" to track immigrants the way "Federal Express tracks packages" (Questions for the Gov of New Jersey: 1) Is your thinking we'll tattoo bar codes and/or numbers onto immigrants?, 2) Do you recall ever seeing photos of the numbers the Nazis tattooed on prisoners?)
14
The Republican Party has become entertainment, reminds me of those great Bob Hope Christmas Specials. Someone give the Donald a golf club.
6
I just echo all those folks who missed you. It took me about six calls and emails to find out you were writing a book. Good and let us know when it comes out. Let's start snapping at the clowns again.
1
We've missed you, Gail Collins! You've nailed them all!!
7
They are not running for President. They are all acting in an audition to become the next Saint Ronald Wilson Reagan.
There is no Texas Ted cowboy buried inside of Canadian Cuban Rafael Cruz. And no Louisiana Roman Catholic good old boy inside of the Indian Punjabi Hindu "anchor baby" Piyush Jindal. Carson is Republican while black. Fiorina is a female while Republican. The Donald has only one more wife so far than the Gipper. Jeb wisely picked his father and older brother to be President. Huckabee is no more a Christian than were Judas or Pilate. Rubio is the resurrection of Quayle/Palin. Christie is a corrupt cowardly bully Moby Chris. Walker has the charisma of melting ice. Kasich is from Ohio. Paul has curly haired hubris.
There is no Texas Ted cowboy buried inside of Canadian Cuban Rafael Cruz. And no Louisiana Roman Catholic good old boy inside of the Indian Punjabi Hindu "anchor baby" Piyush Jindal. Carson is Republican while black. Fiorina is a female while Republican. The Donald has only one more wife so far than the Gipper. Jeb wisely picked his father and older brother to be President. Huckabee is no more a Christian than were Judas or Pilate. Rubio is the resurrection of Quayle/Palin. Christie is a corrupt cowardly bully Moby Chris. Walker has the charisma of melting ice. Kasich is from Ohio. Paul has curly haired hubris.
12
I am so glad you are back. And I hope that your vacation allowed you to step back, take a deep breath and count your blessings. Hopefully, your restful vacation has put you in a position to explain to the vast majority of Americans who are afraid to take a vacation, that all is well in la-la-land and to just keep pressing on!
You do make me realize that we live in an exceptional country during an exciting time!
You do make me realize that we live in an exceptional country during an exciting time!
1
The writer seems unfamiliar with the epigenetic newly established evidence of the intelligent design theorists that runs contrary to the 1.5 century old theory of evolution. Whether one accepts it or not, it does have science central to it's theories. To toss this out the window when considering one of the most accomplished Americans of this century I find to be short sited. Carson's meteoric rise from abject poverty certainly leaves the author's ROAD to success dwarfed in my opinion. As such, she seems to have been a little hasty with her cheat sheet.
1
Intelligent design is, more or less by definition, not science.
So glad to have Gail Collins back
1
Ben Carson is a scientist? Noooo. He is a physician. Calling him a scientist is like saying a bank teller is a banker.
4
Great having you back, Gail.
Where to begin? How about the actual beginning: Evolution ... seeing this current lot of astonishingly ignorant jackals and yahoos, I'm starting to doubt the concept of evolution myself.
Where to begin? How about the actual beginning: Evolution ... seeing this current lot of astonishingly ignorant jackals and yahoos, I'm starting to doubt the concept of evolution myself.
8
We really missed you Gail.
4
Is it possible that Carson's surge is fueled by white racists Republicans happy that the 2016 GOP token African American considers Obamacare to be "worse than slavery " ? The lesson Huckabee learned about heart not being popular with GOP voters is only reinforced by Trump's success and the total failure of the Jeb! version of "Compassionate " Conservatism. Fortunately the Huckster's campaign is even more a failure than the Jeb !( "conotes excitement ) logo.
After a couple of hours watching coverage of these wackos I need to watch 2 hrs of Seinfeld to lower my blood pressure to a safe level.
After a couple of hours watching coverage of these wackos I need to watch 2 hrs of Seinfeld to lower my blood pressure to a safe level.
5
Gail, I've missed you so much!
Although I also miss the days of Seamus on the roof, I want to thank you for tossing in Shatner. I love the Shat, and quite frankly he'd do as well as President as any of the Republican clowns. Except he was born in Canada-Oh Wait! If Rafael Eduardo Cruz can run, so can the Shat!
Woo Hoo! Bring on Captain Kirk!
Although I also miss the days of Seamus on the roof, I want to thank you for tossing in Shatner. I love the Shat, and quite frankly he'd do as well as President as any of the Republican clowns. Except he was born in Canada-Oh Wait! If Rafael Eduardo Cruz can run, so can the Shat!
Woo Hoo! Bring on Captain Kirk!
5
Welcome back!! You were sorely missed!
1
That Carson doesn't believe in evolution is not surprising for an MD. The large majority of them are really NOT scientists.
3
Yay! Gail's back and all is again right with the world.
2
Check out the rest of Ben Carson's beliefs: The Pope is the anticrist; the Mark of the Beast is going to church on Sunday, not Saturday; Ellen White was a prophet from God, etc. Read White's book, The Great Controversy, for a full list of off-beat beliefs that Carson holds.
5
Welcome back Gail!
Jeb? was certainly entertaining on The Late Show. His tap dancing could put Earl Hines to shame.
Jeb? was certainly entertaining on The Late Show. His tap dancing could put Earl Hines to shame.
1
I have missed you, too. But the truth is Donald Trump doesn't need a satirist. And he already has Maureen, who writes about nobody else.
4
Welcome back, Gail. Where you been?
1
"The one great thing about Christie is that his scandals almost always involve our national yearning for seamless transportation."
Lest we forget, he killed the tunnel that would have doubled the commuter capacity to Manhattan. Oh, wait, that was PUBLIC capacity, not a double-wide private plane.
Lest we forget, he killed the tunnel that would have doubled the commuter capacity to Manhattan. Oh, wait, that was PUBLIC capacity, not a double-wide private plane.
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So glad you are back. I had to reread your book about Texas for a little of the Collins spirit
2
thank you ms gail collins for doing what you do and the nyt for helping her do it. gail, please work harder and turn the harsh light of reality on to local legislatures. like nc, you know there's a lot of choice material, some, possibly more, outrageous than the national clown posse. but oh so much more relateable due to the local nature. go get em gail. sounds like a national campaign slogan.
1
Jeb, et. al., can't handle Trump. How in the world will they ever handle Vladimir Putin?
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More importantly, how would Trump and Putin occupy the same room?
1
I'd like to know how Trump will handle Putin. Trump lives in his own reality; Putin, however, is an all too real nightmare. Trump won't be able to fire him.
Thank god you're back! You have been sorely missed!!
1
"Fiorina was the star of the backup debate in August, besting nationally known figures like Jim Gilmore, the former governor of … a state."
Best line -- signifying just how inconsequential the Repug candidates are.
Best line -- signifying just how inconsequential the Repug candidates are.
3
Yes! Good to see that smiling face again in my newspaper!
1
Finally! Every morning, the first thing I do after getting my tea is check to see if you're back. So many disappointing mornings! (Not a good way to start the day, being disappointed). But you're back now, and all is as right with the world!! I hope you're here to stay and I hope that you had a wonderful summer.
The American Primary has gotten very crazy (personally, my favorite was Huckabee's little security guy stopping Cruz from getting to the center of the action, onstage with the infamous Kim. It was hilarious. And, also, Cruz and Trump brought in a very...um....small crowd for their anti-Iranian deal.
I'm now going to read your column again. Oh, so delightful you're back. You're the one we need to get through these political times. We need to laugh!
The American Primary has gotten very crazy (personally, my favorite was Huckabee's little security guy stopping Cruz from getting to the center of the action, onstage with the infamous Kim. It was hilarious. And, also, Cruz and Trump brought in a very...um....small crowd for their anti-Iranian deal.
I'm now going to read your column again. Oh, so delightful you're back. You're the one we need to get through these political times. We need to laugh!
1
Gail, first: Welcome Back!! I've been worried about ya. Next time you disappear for a month or so, please give us notice so I (at least) can stock up on Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill and Rocky Mountain Reefer to keep the world a funny, and fun, place.
Second, I must cry, "Not Fair!" What's the first thing you do to us? Pen a column bringing up nearly everyone in the Sears Catalogue of Republican Presidential yammering action figures. How are we supposed to respond appropriately and in kind with only 1500 characters (depending on one's vocabulary, ranging from "duh" to pretentious ostentation, that's from 400 to about 17 words, or put another way, from 100 sentences to most of an introductory clause)? Just to name all the clown car occupants eats up close to half our ration allotment.
So, as for Trump, his shtick as scrawny schoolyard loudmouth (backed up by a goon platoon) is already becoming ho-hum. His life history and tales of adversity overcome (probably had to pick up his own socks at NYMA) is losing luster, if only for its monotonously predictable repeated repetition. I must point out, Gail, that you failed to offer appropriate praise for Donald's unprecedented generosity in gifting his chauffeur's wife with a car seat (THIRTY DOLLARS) so she could safely get her newborn home in the taxi.
Carson is a conundrum. Scientist in thrall with evangelical fundamentalism. Talk about a disconnect. Has some janitor been mucking around in his head?
To be continued...
Second, I must cry, "Not Fair!" What's the first thing you do to us? Pen a column bringing up nearly everyone in the Sears Catalogue of Republican Presidential yammering action figures. How are we supposed to respond appropriately and in kind with only 1500 characters (depending on one's vocabulary, ranging from "duh" to pretentious ostentation, that's from 400 to about 17 words, or put another way, from 100 sentences to most of an introductory clause)? Just to name all the clown car occupants eats up close to half our ration allotment.
So, as for Trump, his shtick as scrawny schoolyard loudmouth (backed up by a goon platoon) is already becoming ho-hum. His life history and tales of adversity overcome (probably had to pick up his own socks at NYMA) is losing luster, if only for its monotonously predictable repeated repetition. I must point out, Gail, that you failed to offer appropriate praise for Donald's unprecedented generosity in gifting his chauffeur's wife with a car seat (THIRTY DOLLARS) so she could safely get her newborn home in the taxi.
Carson is a conundrum. Scientist in thrall with evangelical fundamentalism. Talk about a disconnect. Has some janitor been mucking around in his head?
To be continued...
4
Doesn’t Christie’s call to track immigrants like UPS packages raise the question: who is going to pay for all those implantable microchips?
Bar codes tattoed on wrists are a little too reminiscent of WW II concentration camps. Other suggestions?
Bar codes tattoed on wrists are a little too reminiscent of WW II concentration camps. Other suggestions?
5
Great to see you back, Gail! This kooky primary season wasn't the same without you pointing out the absurd, which was starting to look much too normal.
They are all full of it and obviously bought and paid for. Bernie Sanders is the clear choice for any rational human.
2
Collins is back and as partisan as ever. At least Maureen Dowd is equally critical of Democrats and Republicans. Not Collins. It's all Republican bashing, all the time. Perhaps this is due to the fact that the short and sad list of Democrat candidates consists of only a congenital liar and an avowed socialist.
Don't forget Donald Trump channeling Charlie Sheen. Winning!
2
Good analysis Gail,
Don't forget Gov. Kasich....he's been doing well in his campaign stops in NH and elsewhere, has been picking up some key endorsements, and enjoying his time 'on the road'. He’s super smart, has a great resume from his experiences on the Hill and as a Governor, takes a candid approach to issues, responds directly to questions, and has a great sense of humor – all very strong attributes in a candidate for the Presidency.
Don't forget Gov. Kasich....he's been doing well in his campaign stops in NH and elsewhere, has been picking up some key endorsements, and enjoying his time 'on the road'. He’s super smart, has a great resume from his experiences on the Hill and as a Governor, takes a candid approach to issues, responds directly to questions, and has a great sense of humor – all very strong attributes in a candidate for the Presidency.
1
So happy you are back! I've missed you since July! Spot on as usual. Hopefully Christie, Cruz and Huckabee will soon be gone.
3
Mainly it's just so very nice to have you back Gail
4
Gail,
Do you remember Jimmy Breslin's 1969 novel about NYC mobsters, "The Gang the Couldn't Shoot Straight"? You have an equally rich vain of material here.
Welcome back.
Do you remember Jimmy Breslin's 1969 novel about NYC mobsters, "The Gang the Couldn't Shoot Straight"? You have an equally rich vain of material here.
Welcome back.
7
How funny, Gail. Too bad you wasted precious space on this web site by failing to provide any useful analysis that may help your readers make an intelligent choice in the Democratic primary. That is the primary that virtually all of them will vote in, I assume. You probably missed the story of the summer however - Hillary's reckless, if not felonious, handling of classified information while she attempted to be this country's Secretary of State for four years. That is NOT a laughing matter so you will probably ignore it. Thanks for nothing.
2
Oh, I don't know, as a former US Air Force officer I'm very interested in knowing how Trump compares his boarding school experience to active duty military experience "in the true sense". Because I'm curious about a future President Trump's willingness to engage in military interventions if he thinks military service involves little more than marching around a parade field.
Conservatives must have gotten the word out to troll Gail's column this am.
Gail normally writes humorous columns and this is an opinion piece, not a news piece. If you don't like her column because she isn't writing about what you want her to, you can always go back to Fox or one of the other reliably regressive websites and newspapers. I know that they are wall-to-wall coverage of Hillary's emails and Benghazi(!)
Gail normally writes humorous columns and this is an opinion piece, not a news piece. If you don't like her column because she isn't writing about what you want her to, you can always go back to Fox or one of the other reliably regressive websites and newspapers. I know that they are wall-to-wall coverage of Hillary's emails and Benghazi(!)
As they continually probe the depths of political depravity they should keep in mind that one of them will have to rise to compete in the general. The danger is that in quickly rising from those depths , the risk of a severe case of the "decompression sickness" is in the offing; make running for President difficult.
Since Ben Carson does not believe in evolution I have to believe that he does not believe in antibiotics either. He may not realize that because of evolution the CDC issues a new flu vaccine every year at this time. Please don't tell me he doesn't believe in vaccines either.
11
Al I can say is thank god you're back!
In these troubling times, we really need Gail Collins to make us laugh through the horror.
In these troubling times, we really need Gail Collins to make us laugh through the horror.
8
Horror is right!
Happy to see you back Gail!
My only comment to an otherwise hilarious and to-the-point OpEd, is that you give way too much credit to Carson by calling him a scientist. He is a brain surgeon and a successful one, but his work does not entail work that a scientist would do. He probably took science courses, like biology (before evolution was a viable part of it), chemistry and health related topics like radiology, immunology, etc. But it is probably doubtful that he ever did serious research in these fields (not that these would lead to his antievolutionary believes). I would further wager, that if he rejects evolution, he also refutes the overwhelming evidence of the origin of earth, the solar system and the universe, all contrary to biblical revelations. For to accept those origins critically you need extensive background in physics, astronomy, geophysics, geology and paleontology among other disciplines. What is striking with Carson and his ilk is that they accept the science and technology that allowed their career successes, but deny the findings of science branches that do not support their innate, faith-based believes. That alone disqualifies him as a scientist. And because of his intrinsic mistrust in science base knowledge, a consequence of uncritical thinking typical of the GOP presidential hopefuls, also disqualifies him as president in this evermore science and technology based world.
My only comment to an otherwise hilarious and to-the-point OpEd, is that you give way too much credit to Carson by calling him a scientist. He is a brain surgeon and a successful one, but his work does not entail work that a scientist would do. He probably took science courses, like biology (before evolution was a viable part of it), chemistry and health related topics like radiology, immunology, etc. But it is probably doubtful that he ever did serious research in these fields (not that these would lead to his antievolutionary believes). I would further wager, that if he rejects evolution, he also refutes the overwhelming evidence of the origin of earth, the solar system and the universe, all contrary to biblical revelations. For to accept those origins critically you need extensive background in physics, astronomy, geophysics, geology and paleontology among other disciplines. What is striking with Carson and his ilk is that they accept the science and technology that allowed their career successes, but deny the findings of science branches that do not support their innate, faith-based believes. That alone disqualifies him as a scientist. And because of his intrinsic mistrust in science base knowledge, a consequence of uncritical thinking typical of the GOP presidential hopefuls, also disqualifies him as president in this evermore science and technology based world.
14
I am so puzzled by the brain surgeon and his beliefs, that I have to think he probably only started the first least precarious cut on someone's brain and than the rest was done by capable residents or interns.
Actually I have read reports that he did research...using fetal tissue! Which he now wants to accuse Planned Parenthood of "trafficking" in. Where do you suppose his research materials came from? NB a neurosurgeon by definition has to be well grounded in science. Which is why his science denial ism is so bizarre. What other cognitive dissonances would emerge if he attained high political office?
Welcome back, Gail.
2
The Republicans should choose a candidate who is competent and engaging like Vice President Sarah Palin.
3
Gail,
Would You Please run for President??
Seriously. People think it's time for a woman president and no one wants Hillary.
Your only real problem is that you actually know what you talking about.
Recommend this comment to DRAFT Gail Collins for President!!
And NO, I don't care which party.
Would You Please run for President??
Seriously. People think it's time for a woman president and no one wants Hillary.
Your only real problem is that you actually know what you talking about.
Recommend this comment to DRAFT Gail Collins for President!!
And NO, I don't care which party.
6
Welcome back Gail! I have missed you. And I have missed your humorous yet insightful column. I actually laugh when I read it instead of feeling the anger and despair at what our political system has devolved into.
3
You've rejoined us just in time. Donald Trump is about to afix his hair to his helicopter and fly off to Canada and we need you to chronicle it all for us. Welcome back.
3
I'm just so disappointed that the dog-on-the-roof meme seems to have left the Republican big top tent. Welcome back.
1
Yea! Gail's back!
1
What about Governor Christie's desire to put bar codes on immigrants? Does he know that Adolf Hitler did that sort of thing, and that it didn't do much for his reputation?
11
Finally, I was able to exhale as I looked to see if you had returned. Can't wait for the democratic cheat sheet next time. Thanks for the primer.
1
"Sleazy of the Week Award" - Donald Trump for his gratuitously nasty misogynist comments in Rolling Stone about Carly Fiorina's appearance.
"Sleazy of the Week Award" Runner up: Mike Huckabee for, well, being Mike Huckabee.
Lock for next week's "Sleazy of the Week Award" - Ted Cruz if he can persuade his party to shut down the federal government again.
"Sleazy of the Week Award" Runner up: Mike Huckabee for, well, being Mike Huckabee.
Lock for next week's "Sleazy of the Week Award" - Ted Cruz if he can persuade his party to shut down the federal government again.
12
So happy you are back, as you are a great writer. Love your sense of humor
3
Thank you for demonstrating once again that these politicians are not completely worthless.
1
Welcome back Kot.., sorry, Gail!
2
Welcome back – you were missed. The New York Times has a very talented (mostly) group of columnists, but Gail Collins is the best summer-upper of the bunch. In this age of the search for increased worker productivity – and ignoring it when you find it, in favor of outsourcing to Asia – Ms. Collins is the most efficient journalist around. She conveys, by far, the most wisdom in the fewest words.
One criticism of today’s column. The readers who fully understand both the perceptiveness and humor of “A Presidential Primary Cheat Sheet” wouldn’t be caught dead voting in a Republican primary.
One criticism of today’s column. The readers who fully understand both the perceptiveness and humor of “A Presidential Primary Cheat Sheet” wouldn’t be caught dead voting in a Republican primary.
5
Boy, were you missed. And what's with the month long book tours? Just need to go on TV once and get back to work. There is too much going on. You didn't even mention my favorite Republican Candidate, Rick Perry. I've always rooted for him because if he gets far enough we'll have to talk about Todd Willingham.
As I say: WHAT ABOUT RICK PERRY?
As I say: WHAT ABOUT RICK PERRY?
1
Glad to see you back Gail, I missed you.
republicans are against contraception (which means they are against sex!)
you can't make this stuff up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
you can't make this stuff up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1
Finding Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal in this campaign is harder than finding Waldo. I can’t even spot him in this cheat sheet of Republican presidential candidates.
Maybe his campaign slogan should be: "Jindal, the stealth candidate!"
Maybe his campaign slogan should be: "Jindal, the stealth candidate!"
8
"t’s been a time-honored campaign tactic ever since the days of President Newt Gingrich."
It might just be worth it, just so we could say we had a President Newt.
It might just be worth it, just so we could say we had a President Newt.
1
Oh, Gail, thank goodness you're back. There has been so much to laugh at since you've been gone, but no one else seems to have your je ne sais quoi. We are ready to laugh in the face of so much idiocy and obduracy. Welcome back.
1
Welcome back! Sure did miss you. When does the book come out?
I'm another one of the many who welcome you back. I hope you'll train your sights on the Kentucky marvel, aka County Clerk Davis, escorted from the slammer by [let's hear it for ...] Huckabee! My personal view is that this nonsense is indicative of a state whose senior senator is none other than [let's give it up it for ...] Mitch McConnell! One wonders if it's possible to smoke blue grass.
3
With others, glad to see you back! Now, I do have a problem. Ted Cruz was born in Canada, no new documentation needed, so why is he still part of the presidential political scene at all? Are the media perpetuating his invalid candidacy just for fun? Because his nonsense is entertaining?
You are the one person who could debunk his candidacy once and for all. Or are you caged into some NYT party line?
You are the one person who could debunk his candidacy once and for all. Or are you caged into some NYT party line?
Whew! Finally, she's back. I hope the book will be worth the hiatus. Better be good to do that.
Welcome back Gail! We missed you. Please don't go away again for any reason. Thanks.
2
Gail, please don't do this again. An incredibly confusing summer goes by and you're writing a book or something. We really needed you to help us make sense of the Donald, the Kim, the Ted, and oh so many more nut cases on the loose this summer.
2
Latest CNN poll shows republicans favoring Trump by a whopping 32% with Carson at 19%. A majority of republicans want to turn over the keys to the nuclear arsenal to Trump and Carson?
1
Now that Gail Collins is back some sanity has now been restored to reading The Times on Thursdays. I had hopes that she was going to take over David Letterman's or Jon Stewart's spots.
The Republican candidates offer so much to mock you'd have to work 24/7 to keep up with them.
The Republican candidates offer so much to mock you'd have to work 24/7 to keep up with them.
2
There is a reason another Hollywood entertainer is leading this year's Republican entertainment.
3
Welcome back, dear Gail! We missed you and your wise cracks about the "Gang of 18" GOP Wannabe POTUSes sprinting for the White House.
We know JEB!s name is John Ellis Bush, and we know he is boring -notwithstanding his new White House North manse in Bar and Poppy's compound at Kennebunkport.
Ben Carson surging? Please! The fine neurosurgeon is a good man, but not a potential leader like his memorable predecessor up on the GOP Caucus Stage Shows in '12, King Pizza - the man who couldn't remember unimportant names of foreign countries - cf "bekki bekki stans". Dr. Carson is a scientist who doesn't believe in evolution or climate warming.
And Donald Trump, the less mentioned, the better. He went to military school in New York State because of his behaviour problems and knows all there is to know about the military. Not to speak of international diplomacy and foreign policy. Grade F+.
Carly Fiorina is dogged as the pretty Michele Bachmann - who mistook John Wayne Gacy's birthplace for movie great John "Duke" Wayne's.
CNN should circular file the following from their Tea Party Debate show next Wednesday night: Huckabee, Kasich, Rubio and Walker who have deflated like giant balloons in the Macy*s Thanksgiving Day parade. Chris Christie, whose star has fallen . And Ted Cruz who has hitched his star to Donald Trump. Odd Couple. The other 8 of the declared Hobson's Choice horses in this GOP Primary caucus don't deserve post positions in this race.
We know JEB!s name is John Ellis Bush, and we know he is boring -notwithstanding his new White House North manse in Bar and Poppy's compound at Kennebunkport.
Ben Carson surging? Please! The fine neurosurgeon is a good man, but not a potential leader like his memorable predecessor up on the GOP Caucus Stage Shows in '12, King Pizza - the man who couldn't remember unimportant names of foreign countries - cf "bekki bekki stans". Dr. Carson is a scientist who doesn't believe in evolution or climate warming.
And Donald Trump, the less mentioned, the better. He went to military school in New York State because of his behaviour problems and knows all there is to know about the military. Not to speak of international diplomacy and foreign policy. Grade F+.
Carly Fiorina is dogged as the pretty Michele Bachmann - who mistook John Wayne Gacy's birthplace for movie great John "Duke" Wayne's.
CNN should circular file the following from their Tea Party Debate show next Wednesday night: Huckabee, Kasich, Rubio and Walker who have deflated like giant balloons in the Macy*s Thanksgiving Day parade. Chris Christie, whose star has fallen . And Ted Cruz who has hitched his star to Donald Trump. Odd Couple. The other 8 of the declared Hobson's Choice horses in this GOP Primary caucus don't deserve post positions in this race.
1
Welcome back, Gail! We missed you? Where else could we read about the political penchant for "seamless transportation?"
2
Welcome back Gail!
1
Welcome back, Gail. Where have you been? We've missed you. Please don't go away again. You are a bright spot in a depressing political season that never ends.
4
Actually, that's John Ellis Bush, hence that good ole boy-sounding Jeb. To paraphrase H. L. Mencken: "I shall not vote for John Ellis Bush." (Warren Gamaliel Harding in the original.)
2
Apart from the scary religious thing, I like Ben Carson, like a lot of Americans. But brain surgeons are not scientists -- they're glorified auto mechanics by another name. You can believe in God and not in evolution, and still recognize that a carburetor mixes air with a fine spray of liquid fuel, or that the cerebellum coordinates muscle movements.
CNN should throw out Heidi Klum, because The Donald believes that she's no longer a ten (could'a fooled most of us).
Marco Rubio is keeping his head low because summer's almost over and he can no longer depend on pool-party games to keep his name before the people.
Gail must be saving up spit for The Donald -- probably keeping something about a dog strapped to the top of his chauffeured limo.
But nothing on the Democratic Clown Car. Such a disappointment.
Twenty declared candidates and almost a dozen possibles, with Biden causing all the stir just now. Then, of course, nobody's paying attention to most of THEM, because it's really Hillary and Bernie who count. THAT first debate really should be limited to them, unless Biden declares. We'll be sure to insist on a can of Ensure at every lectern. Of course, if Biden doesn't declare and Hillary participates remotely from a minimum-security jail cell in CT, Bernie gets ALL the Ensure.
In the end, though, it'll be Hillary. The killer for Bernie will be publically pining for an America that looks more like Sweden, and with that he'll lose all the Democrats who belong to the NRA.
CNN should throw out Heidi Klum, because The Donald believes that she's no longer a ten (could'a fooled most of us).
Marco Rubio is keeping his head low because summer's almost over and he can no longer depend on pool-party games to keep his name before the people.
Gail must be saving up spit for The Donald -- probably keeping something about a dog strapped to the top of his chauffeured limo.
But nothing on the Democratic Clown Car. Such a disappointment.
Twenty declared candidates and almost a dozen possibles, with Biden causing all the stir just now. Then, of course, nobody's paying attention to most of THEM, because it's really Hillary and Bernie who count. THAT first debate really should be limited to them, unless Biden declares. We'll be sure to insist on a can of Ensure at every lectern. Of course, if Biden doesn't declare and Hillary participates remotely from a minimum-security jail cell in CT, Bernie gets ALL the Ensure.
In the end, though, it'll be Hillary. The killer for Bernie will be publically pining for an America that looks more like Sweden, and with that he'll lose all the Democrats who belong to the NRA.
These frauds, fools, phonies with self deluded notions of competence and relevance crowd the news with their blathering spouting hideously insensitive nonsense. Do they care about anything that really matters other than themselves and their cynical campaign contributors who themselves suffer fatal grandiosity? They prance about as though they meant something. They are self deluded jerks who threaten our democracy that would come crashing down should any of them be elected. We are profoundly endangered by their misjudgments and offensive braggadocio. GET OUT THERE! GET INVOLVED! VOTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5
Hooray! You're back! And I see you got the memo that you're not supposed to write about Bernie Sanders.
2
Welcome back, Gail! I've missed you.
2
Let's hope one of them straps a dog to the roof of a car before winter. Good to have you back.
Welcome back Gail! I have sorely missed your witty and hilarious musings on the campaign circus!
Hooray!! You're back!
1
Good to have you off book leave!
1
Wonderful to have Gail Collins back--especially now that Jon Stewart is gone!
2
I am glad you have returned. Unlike many of the NYT columnists, you have a sense of humor. Thank goodness.
Until this morning I did not know that Ben Carson does not believe in evolution. Thank you Gail. I will now be spending most of my conscious day trying to wrap my brain around this. Am I the only one who is fascinated by this?
5
Gail, I'm so glad you are back!!!! Hilarious and insightful column.
1
Another Thursday, I thought bleakly. Another op-ed page without Gail Collins. Then I opened the paper and...wow, there she is! Welcome back, Gail and thanks for the rundown. I'll keep it handy by my bed when I'm counting Republicans to help me fall asleep.
4
America's best and brightest. Pathetic.
1
Missed you. Glad you're back.
2
With Stephen Colbert having left a void at Comedy Central Gail Collins could not have come any sooner back to the NYT columns.
My sanity has almost fully recovered!!
My sanity has almost fully recovered!!
5
It’s really simple.
Our president and the lawmakers work for us. I want the body cameras on them at any moment they conduct the governmental business, especially between 8 am and 5 pm.
If they ever claimed that there is something we the voters should not know they must resign immediately.
Every time they hid something from us we paid a terrible price.
Do you remember them invoking repeatedly some confidential information shared between the allies that got us involved in waging the useless wars in Afghanistan and Iraq?
Do you remember their claims that those two wars would change the Middle East, spread democracy and contain Iran?
Do you remember them claiming the free trade would create better paid jobs here in America? Do you remember them claiming the tax cuts would eliminate the budget deficits and the national debt?
Our elected officials got everything wrong.
It means we the people are smarter than a handful of elected officials. Thus they must wear the body cameras and share every available information with us because 300 million people as a whole are smarter than mere 536 politicians…
Our president and the lawmakers work for us. I want the body cameras on them at any moment they conduct the governmental business, especially between 8 am and 5 pm.
If they ever claimed that there is something we the voters should not know they must resign immediately.
Every time they hid something from us we paid a terrible price.
Do you remember them invoking repeatedly some confidential information shared between the allies that got us involved in waging the useless wars in Afghanistan and Iraq?
Do you remember their claims that those two wars would change the Middle East, spread democracy and contain Iran?
Do you remember them claiming the free trade would create better paid jobs here in America? Do you remember them claiming the tax cuts would eliminate the budget deficits and the national debt?
Our elected officials got everything wrong.
It means we the people are smarter than a handful of elected officials. Thus they must wear the body cameras and share every available information with us because 300 million people as a whole are smarter than mere 536 politicians…
3
Everyone could agree that Ben Carson is a gifted surgeon. But, contrary to Gail Collins' statement, the fact that Ben Carson is a gifted surgeon does not make Ben Carson a scientist, at least if being a scientist includes making observations and drawing conclusions based on scientific evidence. Were Carson truly a scientist, he would have not dispute the findings related to evolution.
1
Gail is just using a kind of shorthand for the fact that Carson has had extensive scientific training, and that because of this, he really SHOULD know better.
Gail needs to give her take on whether or not America will have to endure the excruciating pain of "Cruzifiction".
107
Gail... I love your columns. But surgeons (Ben Carson) are not scientists. Physicians are not scientists. They are not trained in the scientific method. This may explain the dismal state of much medical/health - related "research". Plenty of medical doctors have some pretty screwy ideas.
7
Welcome back, Ms. Collins. I have awaited your return, and you do not disappoint. Ever.
That said, a surgeon is not necessarily a scientist, any more than a chef, or a juggler, or any pro athlete who uses his hands. Surgeons learn procedures and perform them. Some, of course, have learned much more, but it's not necessary. The designated hitter in baseball doesn't need to catch or throw, just hit the ball. The surgeon just has to know where and how to cut and sew.
That said, a surgeon is not necessarily a scientist, any more than a chef, or a juggler, or any pro athlete who uses his hands. Surgeons learn procedures and perform them. Some, of course, have learned much more, but it's not necessary. The designated hitter in baseball doesn't need to catch or throw, just hit the ball. The surgeon just has to know where and how to cut and sew.
7
Gail, thank you for giving me something to smile about this morning regarding this pathetic circus. Although I am a Democrat I find it sad and scary that the opposition party has sunk this low and even worse that according to Nate Silver's recent predictions they stand a good chance of winning in 2016.
5
Whatever happened to the idea of logic in the modern Republican party?
Ronald Reagan once proclaimed that cutting taxes would decrease our deficits, then proceeded to bankrupt our country.
Did the GOP learn from this? The modern GOP loons are selling the same snake oil.
Ronald Reagan once proclaimed that cutting taxes would decrease our deficits, then proceeded to bankrupt our country.
Did the GOP learn from this? The modern GOP loons are selling the same snake oil.
4
Welcome back, again. You know what the hardest part of all of this is --- yesterday, someone asked me if my grandson would be interested in one of the military academies. (he's somewhat smart, is extremely athletic - think gods --- and has quite the eye) But, then I look at the lineup you have just presented us with --- and they want my grandson, my blood, the apple of my eye, to defend this? I think, I will cry.
3
First I want to say for many we are thrilled you are back!
But I want to quibble about under-appreciated Scott Walker. He is the only candidate to call for a big wall to keep the illegals (presumably criminals and rapist) penetrating through the much longer northern border with Canada. Scott managed in an ocean of total silliness to out-silly all of them. He is not a run or the mill buffoon like the rest of them.
But I want to quibble about under-appreciated Scott Walker. He is the only candidate to call for a big wall to keep the illegals (presumably criminals and rapist) penetrating through the much longer northern border with Canada. Scott managed in an ocean of total silliness to out-silly all of them. He is not a run or the mill buffoon like the rest of them.
9
Perhaps Christie's wanting to treat human beings like FedEx packages is just as silly. And possibly more evil.
It's hard to believe this is the 21st century in America.
The religious and militaristic tone of the candidates, is unapologetic, our we entering the modern equivalent of the dark ages, or has reality taken a holiday.
The religious and militaristic tone of the candidates, is unapologetic, our we entering the modern equivalent of the dark ages, or has reality taken a holiday.
13
Understanding the issues facing us and having a clear plan for dealing with them, other than tithing, is not brain surgery.
3
Ben Carson is not a scientist, he is a surgeon. There is an enormous difference in rational thinking there.
3
The fact that Ben Carson doesn't believe in evolution despite being a physician is not unusual. I once worked with a geneticist who didn't believe in it either. For that matter, how many lawyers don't believe they need to obey the law?
5
It's amazing to me that someone who would be laughed out of a 9th grade science class can really be considered a serious candidate for a national party's nomination.
5
Sorry, Gail. I haven't even finished reading, but a surgeon is NOT a scientist. Perhaps an analogy to engineer is more appropriate.
Surgery and the scientific method have nothing to do with each other.
Surgery and the scientific method have nothing to do with each other.
4
This would be hysterically funny except that it isn't. I think you see the distinction. Even though the actual election is 14 months (plus or minus a few days) from now, the point is that one of these people *could* become the next president. And then what...
6
Always appreciate Gail's ability to codify the national yearning. And her ability to see humor in that dismal bunch of neanderthals we like to call the grand old party.
7
A minor point. Actually, doctors such as Carson are usually not scientists. They're mostly like engineers.
2
I am very disappointed in Jeb Bush. Although I will vote for the Democratic presidential candidate in 2016, I was hoping that a viable Republican would be nominated for the simple reason that if the Republican wins America will still have a talented president. Yesterday, Jeb announced his tax plan, and big surprise it contains very substantial tax cuts for those with incomes over 10 million dollars. Jeb's Super Pac has apparently raised over 100 million dollars, so like many of the other candidates, he is beholden to his wealthy donors.
215
Republican check sheet:
Over inflated sense of self or family silver spoons: check all
Believes in trickle-down economics: check all
Believes in absolute American exceptionalism in everything: check all
Desperate for newsworthy political statements or stunts: check all
Doesn't believe in science: check all (Carson is a medical mechanic)
Pandering to the base: check all
Extreme confidence in their governing ideas: check all
Devoid of thoughtfulness, intelligence, nuance, practicality, realism and empathy for the common citizen: check all
Over inflated sense of self or family silver spoons: check all
Believes in trickle-down economics: check all
Believes in absolute American exceptionalism in everything: check all
Desperate for newsworthy political statements or stunts: check all
Doesn't believe in science: check all (Carson is a medical mechanic)
Pandering to the base: check all
Extreme confidence in their governing ideas: check all
Devoid of thoughtfulness, intelligence, nuance, practicality, realism and empathy for the common citizen: check all
13
Re: "Carson is a scientist." Medical doctors are not scientists! They are essentially highly trained (some would say overly-trained) technicians. Unless they have gone to a MD-Ph D program (i.e., actually trained to be a scientist), it is simply incorrect to call a medical doctor a scientist. Anyway, why is it of interest that Carson doesn't believe in the Darwinian theory of evolution? He is simply showing himself to be a contrarian and believer in dogma. What would be of interest is for him to advance an intelligent argument against the Darwinian theory of human evolution. But he hasn't.
1
Not all doctors are scientists but the idea that only those who also have Ph.D. can be considered ones is ludicrous. Would you not consider Fred Banting, the discover of insulin, Jonas Salk, Albert Sabin, and many other M.D.'s who have made major contributions to science to be scientists?
Ben Carson may be a neurosurgeon, but a neurosurgeon is not a scientist, he's a skilled technician. Being an electrician doesn't make you Nikola Tesla. Being a carpenter doesn't make you Christopher Wren. Writing computer code doesn't make you Alan Turing.
The theory of evolution has no bearing on what Carson does; if he knows the physiology, structure, and function of the brain, it makes no difference whether he believes it developed over millennia from H. erectus or H. naledi (welcome to the family!), or whether he believes God made it.
In 'A Study in Scarlet' Sherlock Holmes stunned Dr Watson by remarking casually that he believed in a geocentric solar system. When Watson told him otherwise he replied he'd strive to forget the fact; 'a man's brain is like a little empty attic' and every useless fact elbows out a useful one. 'You say that we go round the sun. If we went round the moon it would not make a pennyworth of difference to me or to my work.' Thus he could churn out a monograph on the dozens of different types of cigar ash or mud in the London area - facts useful to his detecting - but not care a whit about astronomy.
A technician applies his training to accomplish a task with expected, predictable results. A scientist applies his knowledge to uncover new knowledge and unexpected results. This is appropriate; I don't think you want your neurosurgeon opening your skull and experimenting.
The theory of evolution has no bearing on what Carson does; if he knows the physiology, structure, and function of the brain, it makes no difference whether he believes it developed over millennia from H. erectus or H. naledi (welcome to the family!), or whether he believes God made it.
In 'A Study in Scarlet' Sherlock Holmes stunned Dr Watson by remarking casually that he believed in a geocentric solar system. When Watson told him otherwise he replied he'd strive to forget the fact; 'a man's brain is like a little empty attic' and every useless fact elbows out a useful one. 'You say that we go round the sun. If we went round the moon it would not make a pennyworth of difference to me or to my work.' Thus he could churn out a monograph on the dozens of different types of cigar ash or mud in the London area - facts useful to his detecting - but not care a whit about astronomy.
A technician applies his training to accomplish a task with expected, predictable results. A scientist applies his knowledge to uncover new knowledge and unexpected results. This is appropriate; I don't think you want your neurosurgeon opening your skull and experimenting.
5
Underestimating the enemy's ideas is always refreshing;
"What a bunch of idiots" makes sense looking at the ideas presented in the GOP forum.
But rhetorical emotional discourse beats ideas in any election.
They are not as stupid as they pretend to be.
Donald Trump could beat Hillary Clinton in the general election.
"What a bunch of idiots" makes sense looking at the ideas presented in the GOP forum.
But rhetorical emotional discourse beats ideas in any election.
They are not as stupid as they pretend to be.
Donald Trump could beat Hillary Clinton in the general election.
Gosh, Gail - we missed you! However, one of the reasons Americans have grown ever more obese and diabetic over the last few decades is because we've imbued doctors like Ben Carson with the attribute "scientist." Doctors are medical technicians with an ever ready prescription pad.
As for Trump believing he served in the military because he went to military school, it's clear that even Stephen Colbert's "Truthiness" is insufficient to describe or contain his inner narcissist. What The Donald needs is a word that captures him in all his self-worship glory: Trumpiness.
As for Trump believing he served in the military because he went to military school, it's clear that even Stephen Colbert's "Truthiness" is insufficient to describe or contain his inner narcissist. What The Donald needs is a word that captures him in all his self-worship glory: Trumpiness.
13
So much journalism, so early, while we all know we have two choices. Another Clinton or another Bush, and more dysfunction awaiting the US, the prior worlds policemen. All while we are going through another blip of Racism, a new important gay rights phase, and all whipped up about inequality, after a major couple decades of promoting free trade, that matured into full blown globalization, as in rent slave labor with no benefit cost. Comprehensive tax reform is our biggest problem, and our lawmakers cannot begin to deal with it, it is beyond them.
1
I don't see the Cheat Sheet: there is no guidance here.
Remember this truism: money is the root of all evil; moderation is the solution to self-control. If you keep that in mind, you will vote for the stable one.
Trump's appeal is his accumen for making money: it's an addiction, and that makes him vulnerable for more money. Yes, he could be in the pocket ....
Power is also an addiction: that's why we have a checks and balance government. State Rights limit the President's domestic influence.
The Presidency is essentially a Federal job: experience and moderation in international decisiom making leads to international stability. That's the job.
Trump knows nothing about this, nor do others on the cheat sheet, but for Hillary Clintons's expereince as Secretary of State, and Jeb Bush's family of coaches who experienced by trial and error.
The clsoest substitute for experience is a good heart for fairness -- that is what governed Obama. Obama was/is good at wanting lasting peace: peach that both sides can accept, like the Iran Deal. Trump is warrior; that's his foreign policy directive. He wins by the threat and action of war. We don't need unnecesarry dead American soldiers when there are reaonable options.
Calm leads to insight. Who is the calmest of those with no federal experience? Rubio. Rubio could compete with Clinton's or Biden's experience -- that's it.
Remember this truism: money is the root of all evil; moderation is the solution to self-control. If you keep that in mind, you will vote for the stable one.
Trump's appeal is his accumen for making money: it's an addiction, and that makes him vulnerable for more money. Yes, he could be in the pocket ....
Power is also an addiction: that's why we have a checks and balance government. State Rights limit the President's domestic influence.
The Presidency is essentially a Federal job: experience and moderation in international decisiom making leads to international stability. That's the job.
Trump knows nothing about this, nor do others on the cheat sheet, but for Hillary Clintons's expereince as Secretary of State, and Jeb Bush's family of coaches who experienced by trial and error.
The clsoest substitute for experience is a good heart for fairness -- that is what governed Obama. Obama was/is good at wanting lasting peace: peach that both sides can accept, like the Iran Deal. Trump is warrior; that's his foreign policy directive. He wins by the threat and action of war. We don't need unnecesarry dead American soldiers when there are reaonable options.
Calm leads to insight. Who is the calmest of those with no federal experience? Rubio. Rubio could compete with Clinton's or Biden's experience -- that's it.
1
Maybe the Republican Party is logically consistent after all--the anti-government party selects anti-presidential candidates who could destroy our government in no time.
Almost any of these 16 men and 1 woman could probably do a heckuva job wrecking the federal government through: sheer stupidity, clear lack of frontal lobe activity in controlling their obnoxious statements, and/or intentional crony capitalism (which is what they think government is for anyway).
How did the U.S. ever get to such a ridiculous point, and why do so many Americans think destroying the government of the richest (for some people anyway), most powerful country in the world is a really good idea?
Almost any of these 16 men and 1 woman could probably do a heckuva job wrecking the federal government through: sheer stupidity, clear lack of frontal lobe activity in controlling their obnoxious statements, and/or intentional crony capitalism (which is what they think government is for anyway).
How did the U.S. ever get to such a ridiculous point, and why do so many Americans think destroying the government of the richest (for some people anyway), most powerful country in the world is a really good idea?
10
Nice piece, Ms. Collins.
The only problems I have with it are:
1) I love the Shat.
2) You left out CC's most recent outrageous idea: to brand immigrants electronically like FedEx packages. (Reminds one of a certain 1930's leader who branded human beings the old fashioned way.)
The only problems I have with it are:
1) I love the Shat.
2) You left out CC's most recent outrageous idea: to brand immigrants electronically like FedEx packages. (Reminds one of a certain 1930's leader who branded human beings the old fashioned way.)
11
True -- how could Gail have overlooked the FedEx thing? Hope she's saving it for another column, soon. So glad she's back!!!!
1
I used to ship live sea urchins via said service & when they lose a package or delay it, roughly 15% of the time, it was really bad.
In revenge I'd make them ship it back, which they did by ground. Christie is just clueless.
In revenge I'd make them ship it back, which they did by ground. Christie is just clueless.
1
The list of religious fundamentalists on the GOP slate of presidential candidates goes on and on. Science denial is (perhaps has) becoming built into the GOP platform. If you can deny evolution, then it is obvious that global warming is an east coast secular hoax.
Voting for the GOP is voting to go back to the middle ages.
Will I ever cross party lines? Yes, for dog catcher.
Voting for the GOP is voting to go back to the middle ages.
Will I ever cross party lines? Yes, for dog catcher.
10
Welcome back, Gail! The Republican candidates seem to lack any sense of social justice. Their experience in American political life seems to be derived from getting contributions from very wealthy people and as a result they have no idea of what concerns working people. Why else would some of them rant and rave about the national debt, abolishing Social Security and shafting immigrant families. As representatives of the party of wealth they have a grossly distorted image of American life. Keep up the fire!
5
I felt I was drowning, my life passing before my eyes, I was accepting that it would never happen again and then it did. Gail Collins wasn't on some endless sabbatical or retired! No, she was back! Outside I heard the laughter of children playing in the street and I was once again at peace.
9
What a relief that Gail is back to give us a smile. That is, if the reality show that is the presidential campaign didn't have such potentially scary consequences. I'll take the Real Housewives over the Real Candidates any day.
5
If the antics of the Republicans hopefuls seem ridiculous and bizarre, just remember that the ever-lengthening election cycle is only just getting under way. Fasten your seatbelts, people. The silver lining of all this absurdity is that it will provide ample fodder for many more entertaining columns from Gail.
5
If this were a high school election movie:
John E. Bush drives to school in a Camaro some in the 70s thought was cool. His Dad is the old principal, and his brother was school president. JEB is backed by the teachers who know that having him as president will assure them another year of running the joint themselves.
Scott Walker's candidacy began as a joke: One of the Koch twins, who sponsor pro-pollution field trips, bet a la Henry Higgins that he could take the biggest loser in the school, groom him a la My Man Godfrey, and drum up excitement sufficient to get him elected. Eagerly, Koch's friends agreed and designated Scotty as Most Likely to Waste Millions.
The English lit crowd that digs paradoxes has coalesced around Ben Carson. Much like the late policy wonk Paul Ryan, whose absence is sorely missed by those who enjoy the memory of Joe Biden laughing, Carson benefited from government programs but now vows that future generations won't. The ironic twist is that this biologist believes that the Bible is the ultimate scientific authority. A surgeon who measures in cubits.
Disappearing from view are the bit players including Marco, Huck who believes that he should be President of a country that's ruled by laws he considers inferior to those of the Almighty, Christie the scourge of commuters, Carly who nearly reinstalled the glass ceiling, and Graham, who is hiding under the bed.
Results will be announced soon unless Ted shuts down the government so nobody wins.
John E. Bush drives to school in a Camaro some in the 70s thought was cool. His Dad is the old principal, and his brother was school president. JEB is backed by the teachers who know that having him as president will assure them another year of running the joint themselves.
Scott Walker's candidacy began as a joke: One of the Koch twins, who sponsor pro-pollution field trips, bet a la Henry Higgins that he could take the biggest loser in the school, groom him a la My Man Godfrey, and drum up excitement sufficient to get him elected. Eagerly, Koch's friends agreed and designated Scotty as Most Likely to Waste Millions.
The English lit crowd that digs paradoxes has coalesced around Ben Carson. Much like the late policy wonk Paul Ryan, whose absence is sorely missed by those who enjoy the memory of Joe Biden laughing, Carson benefited from government programs but now vows that future generations won't. The ironic twist is that this biologist believes that the Bible is the ultimate scientific authority. A surgeon who measures in cubits.
Disappearing from view are the bit players including Marco, Huck who believes that he should be President of a country that's ruled by laws he considers inferior to those of the Almighty, Christie the scourge of commuters, Carly who nearly reinstalled the glass ceiling, and Graham, who is hiding under the bed.
Results will be announced soon unless Ted shuts down the government so nobody wins.
11
You have to feel a bit sorry for old Jeb. When he was growing up, his nickname was golden in the south due to its association with the most famous Jeb in history, Jeb Stuart. Unfortunately for him, outright associations with the Confederate cause have become somewhat toxic of late.
As to Ben Carson, he's only a scientist if you consider all physicians to be scientists. As a physician myself, I'm not sure that's true. However, I must admit he may be right about that evolution thing. Even Darwin might doubt it if he compared the current crop of Republican candidates with Lincoln. Even that thing on top of Trump's head bears an uncanny resemblance to that on the top of great apes.
As to Ben Carson, he's only a scientist if you consider all physicians to be scientists. As a physician myself, I'm not sure that's true. However, I must admit he may be right about that evolution thing. Even Darwin might doubt it if he compared the current crop of Republican candidates with Lincoln. Even that thing on top of Trump's head bears an uncanny resemblance to that on the top of great apes.
335
If this is a circus it would be entertaining. Rubio and Christie would look good dressed as clowns. Cruz could be the barker. Trump could be the master of ceremony and Jeb Bush could lead the elephants to demonstrate his courage. As presidential candidates it is quite scary.
4
Going from 10 to 11 as a maximum is a precedent set by the band Spinal Tap. Yes, also fictional, they too needed louder amplifiers that didn't just go to 10. They went to 11! Just like TP GOP Presidential debators.
2
Yesterday I finished 6.5 weeks of radiation therapy, and today Gail Collins is back to help keep us in perspective--or from going completely batty in this most exceptional country. Life is good!
14
Just for the record: Ben Carson is not a scientist; he is a physician (as is Rand Paul). Scientists do not "believe in" evolution, they accept it in light of evidence.
20
Exactly.
Gail, how could you fail to mention Trump's over-comb?
It's The most serious and important feature he has for lampooning.
It's The most serious and important feature he has for lampooning.
3
And you thought it couldn't get better than the 2012 GOP Clown Car show, when Thurston Howell III, portrayed by the ever so lovable Mittens Romney in the entitled role of his lifetime, flip-flopped, insulted and sashayed his way to another guaranteed Republican Presidential loss.
It's hard to win a national beauty contest when your insides are ugly, mean and rotten.
Just yesterday, Jeb Voodoo Bush came out with an exciting new Voodoo Tax Cut plan.
It cuts taxes for almost everyone who pays income tax, with by far the largest tax cuts at the top.
Jeb's Voodoo plan would reduce the effective income tax rate on those making $10 million or more.
The average taxpayer in this group earned $29.2 million in 2013, meaning the plan proposed by Mr. Bush would have saved them an average of $1.5 million that year.
Isn't a brand new dose of Voodoo Economics what this country desperately needs ?
Isn't subsidizing millionaires what made America great in first place ?
How else in the world is America going to drown education, science, infrastructure, voting, Social Security, common sense regulation and the common good in a Republican bathtub unless you starve the government of revenues to create a fake fiscal crisis first ?
It's good to see that Jeb! the sleeping giant has finally woken up and started to focus on the serious public policy issues that is most important for 321 million Americans......big tax cuts for the 236,000 millionaires in America.
Greed Over People 2015.
It's hard to win a national beauty contest when your insides are ugly, mean and rotten.
Just yesterday, Jeb Voodoo Bush came out with an exciting new Voodoo Tax Cut plan.
It cuts taxes for almost everyone who pays income tax, with by far the largest tax cuts at the top.
Jeb's Voodoo plan would reduce the effective income tax rate on those making $10 million or more.
The average taxpayer in this group earned $29.2 million in 2013, meaning the plan proposed by Mr. Bush would have saved them an average of $1.5 million that year.
Isn't a brand new dose of Voodoo Economics what this country desperately needs ?
Isn't subsidizing millionaires what made America great in first place ?
How else in the world is America going to drown education, science, infrastructure, voting, Social Security, common sense regulation and the common good in a Republican bathtub unless you starve the government of revenues to create a fake fiscal crisis first ?
It's good to see that Jeb! the sleeping giant has finally woken up and started to focus on the serious public policy issues that is most important for 321 million Americans......big tax cuts for the 236,000 millionaires in America.
Greed Over People 2015.
121
Next week let's have a look at the (must be) hundreds who have been mentioned as "possible running mates."
Convicted ex-governor of Virginia has still not been locked-up and if selected can start campaigning today.
Convicted ex-governor of Virginia has still not been locked-up and if selected can start campaigning today.
8
Great stuff. Thanks
Atta-Girl, Gail. Give 'em all a poke int the eye with a sharp stick. They ARE amusing, but 'amusing' is not what America needs, just now. The specter that any one of the Republicans might be elected to the Oval Office keeps me awake at nights.
12
Gail Collins and Bloom County are back - my life is complete....
5
Gail you picked the worst time to take your vacation! Welcome back and not a moment too soon.
The Don should change his name - he's doing to the presidential race what Katrina did to New Orleans. The rest of republican field is a joke (bad one too) with the exception of Ben Carson. He's a double joke. Thank God I can't vote,
and good luck to all of you who do.
The Don should change his name - he's doing to the presidential race what Katrina did to New Orleans. The rest of republican field is a joke (bad one too) with the exception of Ben Carson. He's a double joke. Thank God I can't vote,
and good luck to all of you who do.
8
So glad you are back! We have desperately needed a chuckle in this dreadful political circus.
14
I'm waiting for that scandalous moment when a former patient or a former patient's family member comes forward to declare that Dr. Carson did indeed recommend he or she get an annual flu shot, thus proving that in order to be even a minimally competent physician, one has no choice but to accept that basis for all modern biology, the theory of evolution. Dare I confess that I've been saving popcorn?
13
The theory of evolution is the basis for all modern biology? Obviously you are not a scientist.
1
Where have you been, Gail Collins? Treatment? Forced vacation? Stocking up on more "dog on the roof" gimmicks.
We've missed you, lass....and all those "ha-ha" laughs of yours. I'm still trying to catch my breath after all those hoots you inserted today.
We missed you Gail Collins, even though you too have name that sounds like something on a credit card.
We've missed you, lass....and all those "ha-ha" laughs of yours. I'm still trying to catch my breath after all those hoots you inserted today.
We missed you Gail Collins, even though you too have name that sounds like something on a credit card.
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These Republican Debates are more fun than SNL, Rowan & Martin's Laugh-in, and the 2nd Clinton or Bush Administration combined. Where else can the people who may force themselves to get out and vote next year learn so much about why they might as well just stay home and search for another episode of the Army of the 12 Monkeys?
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Great column!! One comment - Dr. Carson is not a scientist - he's a doctor of medicine. In that profession he obviously used the tools of science and the knowledge gained from science, but he has no ability to look at the universe in a scientific manner (pick your definition of science, it doesn't matter, he doesn't get it).
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Hopefully one of them will take a family vacation with the family pet strapped to the roof of their car.
Actually the entire election process is rather sad, considering that there is not a single candidate that many people respect. So again, those of us who vote will have to do so while holding our noses. In the general election we now vote for a party instead of individuals. Almost parlimentary.
Actually the entire election process is rather sad, considering that there is not a single candidate that many people respect. So again, those of us who vote will have to do so while holding our noses. In the general election we now vote for a party instead of individuals. Almost parlimentary.
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Glad to have you back.
Molly Ivins had a grand time with the follies of the "Texas Lege" and these Republicans are giving them a run for the money -- of course we've got a reasonable dose of Texans to show them how.
I'm not going to vote for any of them, so one might presume I see all of this with the schadenfreude one reserves for seeing the high school bully at age 40, balding and fat, picking up trash alongside the highway in an orange jumpsuit under the watchful eye of the guy with the paddy wagon and the shotgun.
But sadly, it's not funny anymore, it's just pathetic. The only funny part of it is watching the Donald prove that the Republican voters don't like their party elites at all. What a surprise! Who knew? That ordinary Republicans want social security, healthcare, a job with a decent wage?
But Trump's vicious and callous sides, and the approval they get aren't funny. Those pesky Republican elites know what a disaster they have on their hands now. The Republicans cannot win with Trump, and the elites wouldn't want him to win in any event. But they can't get rid of him and they need the 25% of the Republican voters who support him.
They need to find a way to send him to war and get him killed, in a way that blames the Democrats -- sort of Benghazi plus Uriah. Lacking that, it's going to be a long ugly runup to the election.
Molly Ivins had a grand time with the follies of the "Texas Lege" and these Republicans are giving them a run for the money -- of course we've got a reasonable dose of Texans to show them how.
I'm not going to vote for any of them, so one might presume I see all of this with the schadenfreude one reserves for seeing the high school bully at age 40, balding and fat, picking up trash alongside the highway in an orange jumpsuit under the watchful eye of the guy with the paddy wagon and the shotgun.
But sadly, it's not funny anymore, it's just pathetic. The only funny part of it is watching the Donald prove that the Republican voters don't like their party elites at all. What a surprise! Who knew? That ordinary Republicans want social security, healthcare, a job with a decent wage?
But Trump's vicious and callous sides, and the approval they get aren't funny. Those pesky Republican elites know what a disaster they have on their hands now. The Republicans cannot win with Trump, and the elites wouldn't want him to win in any event. But they can't get rid of him and they need the 25% of the Republican voters who support him.
They need to find a way to send him to war and get him killed, in a way that blames the Democrats -- sort of Benghazi plus Uriah. Lacking that, it's going to be a long ugly runup to the election.
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Our long national nightmare is over, Gail is back. You were missed.
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Isn't that the truth. I actually researched so I could find out where she was. Gail, I really, really missed you. Sometimes the laughter your column brings is the only way I can read the news without crying.
Congratulations Gail! I am sure you are probably recovering from having your tongue so firmly planted in your cheek!
This column actually had me laughing out loud....but that comes from a bittersweet humor. I long for the boring campaigns of Dwight D. Eisenhower v. Adlelai Stevenson when elections had to do with the quality of the candidates and whether their policy visions were good for America and its people.
Our current political climate, while entertaining, is a sad destination for those Americans who survived the Depression, who fought valiantly in WWII and who changed the world by their protests over the Vietnam war and Freedom marches. We now seem to be at the table of the mad hare with Alice, a Cheshire cat and the Queen of Hearts swinging a razor edged pendulum.
The upside? Pundits, columnists and comedians can be assured that at least for the next year they will have enough material to assure their job security!
This column actually had me laughing out loud....but that comes from a bittersweet humor. I long for the boring campaigns of Dwight D. Eisenhower v. Adlelai Stevenson when elections had to do with the quality of the candidates and whether their policy visions were good for America and its people.
Our current political climate, while entertaining, is a sad destination for those Americans who survived the Depression, who fought valiantly in WWII and who changed the world by their protests over the Vietnam war and Freedom marches. We now seem to be at the table of the mad hare with Alice, a Cheshire cat and the Queen of Hearts swinging a razor edged pendulum.
The upside? Pundits, columnists and comedians can be assured that at least for the next year they will have enough material to assure their job security!
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The best neurosurgeon has no more business trying to be President than the best President would have in an OR.
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He has signed the front of a paycheck. Raised in Detroit on welfare. Has seen all sides of healthcare.
No, he was not a community organizer first term junior senator from a deep blue state-so he does have that against him.
No, he was not a community organizer first term junior senator from a deep blue state-so he does have that against him.
Why? Why must we elect professional politicians as president? What would the men who wrote the constitution have to say about your statement? They were citizen legislators who had no interest in being politicians. Those are the kind of people we should elect.
And a real estate developer, self promoter gone bankrupt stiffing his co-investors four times is an OK candidate? All of these 17 Dwarves are pathetic.
Welcome back, Gail, you have been missed!
Don't forget Christie's call to track immigrants like UPS packages.
As for Cruz, the Tea Party crowd is in ecstasy over either a Trump-Cruz ticket or sometimes a Trump-Palin (yes, her) ticket. Too crazy for words either way.
Don't forget Christie's call to track immigrants like UPS packages.
As for Cruz, the Tea Party crowd is in ecstasy over either a Trump-Cruz ticket or sometimes a Trump-Palin (yes, her) ticket. Too crazy for words either way.
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Trump is stupider than I give him credit for if he thinks that pairing himself with Cruz or Palin will help him.
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Hope you enjoyed your summer, glad you're back.
Trump and Cruz were hugely entertaining at the Tea Party rally in DC. I was struck by how much Trump reminded me if the character in 'American Hustle' played by Jennifer Lawrwnce in the scene in which she almost burned down the house with the science oven..." Thank God for me."
Trump and Cruz were hugely entertaining at the Tea Party rally in DC. I was struck by how much Trump reminded me if the character in 'American Hustle' played by Jennifer Lawrwnce in the scene in which she almost burned down the house with the science oven..." Thank God for me."
Actually, Christie called for FedEx tracking. But we get the picture ....
GOP free for all vs. Democrats limiting debate and unlikeable, untrustable Hillary, roped off from reporters, marching for a coronation.
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Which of the GOP candidates do you think is the most likeable? That bundle of charm, Donald Trump? Or Mr. Personality, Ted Cruz (whose own dog growls whenever the senator enters the room)?
At the top of the "trustable" scale--well, it's gotta be Chris Christie, right? Sure, his explanation of events surrounding [name that scandal] strain credulity, but he's so forceful and sincere. How can you not trust the guy?
As for the so-called coronation, the third Bush in the line of succession is discovering that it's not so easy. It's not enough to win over the donor class. You have to have a small shred of talent as a candidate.
At the top of the "trustable" scale--well, it's gotta be Chris Christie, right? Sure, his explanation of events surrounding [name that scandal] strain credulity, but he's so forceful and sincere. How can you not trust the guy?
As for the so-called coronation, the third Bush in the line of succession is discovering that it's not so easy. It's not enough to win over the donor class. You have to have a small shred of talent as a candidate.
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Which of the GOP candidates do you think is the most likeable?
John Kasich.
John Kasich.
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Sorry, but I believe you are confusing "likeable" with "seemingly competent" and "reasonable". Don't forget that so many people thought GW Bush likeable that he almost beat the stiff Al Gore in an election (only took office because his Daddy cashed in some chips with the Supreme Court, which completely overturned the concept of being politically conservative by intervening in a State's rights to resolve their own election results). BTW, Kasich is much too rational to ever get through the current Republican nominating process.
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I have missed your wonderfully jaded look at our government's foibles. Seriously, in the 5 weeks congress was on vacation things went well. Now they are back to be against almost everything that should be dealt with: immigration, the budget, roads, mass transit, and education.
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Congress was hired to be "against almost everything". The Koch brothers wouldn't have it any other way. They would rather see the tower of Babel than the government take action on carbon exchanges or carbon markets or carbon taxes. The market has to be adjusted for the externality of carbon pollution but that would cost them money and they won't have it no matter the cost to the rest of us.
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At the beginning of the campaign season, this was lauded as the deepest and most qualified slate of GOP candidates in years. The truth is that Bush and Kasich are arguably the only top-tier candidates remotely qualified to be President.
Can you say "President Trump" (or Cruz, or Huckabee, or Paul, and so forth) with a straight face?
Can you say "President Trump" (or Cruz, or Huckabee, or Paul, and so forth) with a straight face?
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As a 36-year Florida resident, I will tell the world that Jeb! is a fraud. He was not a competent governor and rather, sought to impose his Catholic religion on state policies as well as people's private decisions that had little to do with administration of the state government. He's just not very smart at all...maybe a few IQ points above his older brother, but he's not intelligent relative to many other presidents this country has had. That is well revealed by his many mistakes that then have to be explained away a few days later.
The idea of a 3rd Bush in office with a continuation of this incompetent Congress is terrifying.
The idea of a 3rd Bush in office with a continuation of this incompetent Congress is terrifying.
Ugh. How I've longed to not have Kasich as our Governor. But President Kasich? Yikes!
He's just a mild-mannered (now...it's an act) clone of Scott Walker. Same attempt at public union busting. We had to pass a Constitutional amendment before he would accept defeat. Same corruption of the state department of development into a public-private partnership whose expenditures are hidden from public view.
Early in his first term, he invited us to get on the Kasich bus or get run over. Disagreements will not be tolerated! He lambasted a cop who pulled him over and lectured him for driving unsafely past an accident with squad cars present and police working the accident. He called the lecturing cop an IDIOT!
Our charter schools largely run by Kasich campaign supporters are considered a travesty even by a national association of charter schools.
And now I hear most out-of-state democrats christen him the reasonable one.
None of them are reasonable. None of them are remotely qualifies to be President. Please, let us in Ohio suffer under Kasich for three more years. We deserve it having elected him twice.
Don't call him the most acceptable of this bunch.
He's just a mild-mannered (now...it's an act) clone of Scott Walker. Same attempt at public union busting. We had to pass a Constitutional amendment before he would accept defeat. Same corruption of the state department of development into a public-private partnership whose expenditures are hidden from public view.
Early in his first term, he invited us to get on the Kasich bus or get run over. Disagreements will not be tolerated! He lambasted a cop who pulled him over and lectured him for driving unsafely past an accident with squad cars present and police working the accident. He called the lecturing cop an IDIOT!
Our charter schools largely run by Kasich campaign supporters are considered a travesty even by a national association of charter schools.
And now I hear most out-of-state democrats christen him the reasonable one.
None of them are reasonable. None of them are remotely qualifies to be President. Please, let us in Ohio suffer under Kasich for three more years. We deserve it having elected him twice.
Don't call him the most acceptable of this bunch.
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How can you say that John Bush is presidential material? However, I do enjoy the name john bush because it can be typed without generating a capitalization/punctuation error!
OMG we missed you. Don't ever go away again.
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I agree. We all need your satirical view on the actual satire that is American politics. Welcome back.
Right, don't leave us without our daily humor please. None of the columnists have your very true but also very funny vision of what's going on in the political arena.
That's OmiGail, isn't it?
Fundamentalist Christians against Obama and the Iran deal. Fundamentalist Muslims butchering their own in Syria and Libya. Fundamentalist Jews in Israel objecting to any kind of Palestinian accommodation. Let’s talk about the origins of dangerous deathly religious Fundamentalism in the three Abrahamic religions. That is where the problem lies.
www.InquiryAbraham.com
www.InquiryAbraham.com
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From the dictionary:
Fundamentalism: strict adherence to any set of basic ideas, beliefs or principles
You're right about the root of the problem being very closely related to fundamentalism, but, it doesn't have to be the three religions, anybody can be a fundamentalist.
Fundamentalism: strict adherence to any set of basic ideas, beliefs or principles
You're right about the root of the problem being very closely related to fundamentalism, but, it doesn't have to be the three religions, anybody can be a fundamentalist.
Don't forget Fundamentalism in the US, e.g., the unmentionables in KY glorifying their inedible heroine.
Amen, my Brother!
When I read the line "our national yearning for seamless transportation", I chuckled and realized how much I have missed you. Welcome back.
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While in elementary school we used to be told that "Anyone can become the President of the United States." Today, it's possible that 'Anyone' may be our next President. To think that I wasted all that time doing other things when I could have been an Anyone, too!
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At last! You were missed.
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Glad to have you back, we need a seriously humorous perspective on the political campaign/gong show that has become the Republican race.
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You do have to admit that the Republicans and Hillary Clinton have done their best to provide laughs to us while Ms. Collins has been away.
Glad to have Gail! back, of course. She was sorely missed.
But to suggest that the Republican political campaign is without serious humor?
But to suggest that the Republican political campaign is without serious humor?
Yeah!! That's all I have to say...just Yeah!!
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You're back! Thank heavens! Some of your colleagues at the Times tried to pinch hit, but, really, they just couldn't quite make it. I fully expect you to be my sole source of news about the presidential campaign until the day I actually vote. Let the good times roll.
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Gail nails it especially with Chris Christies penchant for "seamless" transportation for himself and his cronies while he closes down bridges and kills tunnel projects for the people. The republican field of presidential nominees gets an "a" for arrogance but Christie takes the cake.
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Now that you are back (where were you anyways?) perhaps you can write a column about Senator Bernie Sanders. Then the NY Times will have at least recognized that he is running for the nomination and doing pretty well despite the lack of corporate media coverage.
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Oh, I actually heard him mentioned on Morning Joe this morning. Maybe we should set up a site where people can report any mention of the man, and where that happened. It will be at least as exciting as bird watching.
But the Times did do a piece today on how the Democratic establishment is thinking of drafting a candidate in the face of Hilary's stumbles and Bernie Sander's growing popularity.
The trouble with her writing about Bernie is that I don't think she can make fun of him.
No, Ben Carson is not a scientist. He was trained in the sciences but his work is basically as a technician. A scientist, you know, actually carries out research.
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It's worth noting that although "brain surgeon" is used as a term synonymous with brilliance in fact neurosurgery is considered among the medical specialties that require the least brain power. Other physicians largely consider them to be technicians like car mechanics. They need to be good with their hands but their work doesn't require a great deal of intellect (and I apologize to car mechanics who might feel insulted with being so compared).
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Nicely put.
Dr. Ben Carson has said he has used fetal tissue for research, so yeah, I think he does do research (or used to before he began this Anybody Can Be President Quest). He said the fetal tissue was just put before him, he just found it there, he didn't know where it came from. Uh-huh. It's like saying milk comes from the store, now a cow.
My husbands comment was that he has military experience because when he was an ornery teenager he used to blow up army ants with firecrackers. (He has since become a very gentle man)
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I really missed Gail. If she takes another break, maybe you could be a fill-in.
Save us from ourselves! Other than that I'm speechless.
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Gail, You are back and today is our 49th wedding anniversary. Let the festivities commence!
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Happy anniversary!
Gail, you forgot to note that Jeb has changed his last name to avoid confusion with the disastrous reign of his inept brother. He is now officially John Ellis Exclamation Point, but still being a "dim Bush" he has confused the issue by hiring virtually everyone responsible for his brother's Iraq Fiasco (Wolfowitz, Bolton, etc.).
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Thank God you are back.
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At last some comic relief from the clowns.
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Fear not!
I cannot but hope that come October 20th there will appear the Republican dream candidate that embodies all the virtues conservatives dream about in a President and Commander in Chief. The Right Honourable Stephen Joseph Harper may find himself rejected by the socialism loving 70+% of the Canadian public may accept the task of leading America in the 21st century.
Harper not only has the executive experience he looks Presidential. His policies are not just mainstream Republican he is on the cutting edge of 21st century American conservative thought.
Those who served under him say he is a bigger bully than Trump. He is more Christian than Huckabee or Carson more anti-science than Santorum, more Texas than Perry, more successful than Fiorina and much smarter than Paul. He is more American than Cruz or Rubio and is more cunning than insane. He has the foreign policy experience of Hillary Clinton with the benefit of being a good friend of both Netanyahu and the Saudi King. He is able to negotiate secret weapons deals with Saudis and be Israel's staunchest defender. He is comfortable on Wall street and in Colorado Springs largest mega-churches and when it comes to playing his political chips rewarding friends and punishing enemies he makes Christie and Walker look like a rank novices.
He is not incompetent like a Bush or insane like a Cheney Stephen Harper is better than a natural born American citizen he is the quintessential GOP Presidential dream.
I cannot but hope that come October 20th there will appear the Republican dream candidate that embodies all the virtues conservatives dream about in a President and Commander in Chief. The Right Honourable Stephen Joseph Harper may find himself rejected by the socialism loving 70+% of the Canadian public may accept the task of leading America in the 21st century.
Harper not only has the executive experience he looks Presidential. His policies are not just mainstream Republican he is on the cutting edge of 21st century American conservative thought.
Those who served under him say he is a bigger bully than Trump. He is more Christian than Huckabee or Carson more anti-science than Santorum, more Texas than Perry, more successful than Fiorina and much smarter than Paul. He is more American than Cruz or Rubio and is more cunning than insane. He has the foreign policy experience of Hillary Clinton with the benefit of being a good friend of both Netanyahu and the Saudi King. He is able to negotiate secret weapons deals with Saudis and be Israel's staunchest defender. He is comfortable on Wall street and in Colorado Springs largest mega-churches and when it comes to playing his political chips rewarding friends and punishing enemies he makes Christie and Walker look like a rank novices.
He is not incompetent like a Bush or insane like a Cheney Stephen Harper is better than a natural born American citizen he is the quintessential GOP Presidential dream.
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Excellent idea. As I hover on the brink of Lunenburg Bay, about to cast one of my passports into the rolling waves, it seems eminently suitable that I might be able to make the US this valuable present in return.
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Lest I forget. Harper is the master of the art of condescension. I have seen William F. Buckley throw out words whose origin were in a far off galaxy and become seemingly flummoxed when his guest did not recognize the words he should of learned in kindergarten. I have watched Dick Cheney engage in the most convoluted of illogical arguments and become enraged that the interviewer did not understand what any grade would find simple and coherent. Who will forget the Mormon Elder and financial genius Mitt Romney's dismissal of 47% of the American population as social parasites.
Harper has them all beat as anyone who watched his interview with the consummate Canadian news anchor Peter Mansbridge a man old enough to be Harper's father and how Harper talked to "Peter' like we might talk to an unruly four year old.
The GOP controls the house, the Senate and the Supreme Court surely they can find a way to have their perfect candidate carry their banner in 2016.
Harper has them all beat as anyone who watched his interview with the consummate Canadian news anchor Peter Mansbridge a man old enough to be Harper's father and how Harper talked to "Peter' like we might talk to an unruly four year old.
The GOP controls the house, the Senate and the Supreme Court surely they can find a way to have their perfect candidate carry their banner in 2016.
2
Wow Montreal Moe you are so generous, how can we thank you? I know, we'll send you the entire Clown Car, plus we'll even throw in Hillary!
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you mentioned Newt at the end of the column. I have been missing his vast pomposity and extravagant pseudo-intellectualism. Christie and Walker together cannot match Newt's blowhard qualities, though your quote from Walker is Newtonian. Happily, Newt is staying on the sidelines this time.
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Nor Newt's smarts--he is actually intelligent which is more than you can say for Christie or Walker.
1
. . . but Newt was great for generating the best headlines, especially in the New York Post. I still have a copy of the paper proclaiming 'Newt Seen Edging Santorum.' I don't see any of the current GOP lot having the same panache. So sad.
Newt has been outcrazied by the candidates and Dick Cheney.
Trump: The New American Nightmare
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Or, as Gail says, the quintessential Ugly American.
Where have you been? We’ve missed you! SO glad to have you back writing! I haven’t even read your column yet - just had to say how glad I am you’re finally back!
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Welcome Back!!! I was just wondering if my New York Times subscription was worth it without your scintillating columns!
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Not to digress, but today we read in another Times article of Homo naledi, a human ancestor that buried its dead and a remote predecessor of Homo politicus, which buries its mistakes.
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And I thought it was an ad for the next GOP contender.
OMG!! All I can say is thank god you're back!!
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It would be funny....if it wasn't true. The Republican nominating process has all the makings of a really bad reality TV event. Pass the popcorn, this is going to be fun to watch.
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Gail, We truly appreciate your ability to simplify the unintelligible positions, of the current field of simpleminded Republican Presidential candidates.
Their ability to dismiss the falsehoods of climate change, their popular goals such as; abolishing the Affordable Care Act, eliminating Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, replacing the VA with "vouchers" and shutting down most of our Government, has been an inspiration to their many supporters and voters!
You may also consider evaluating the "extreme" positions of the one "radical" Democratic running for office, Bernie Sanders!
He intends to actually address and attempt to solve our nations problems through legislation! He has advocated making state schools tuition-free for all, in part by passing a tax on financial transactions.
Contemplate an administration that offers legislative solutions to our current problems of lingering unemployment, immigration reform, crumbling infrastructure, skyrocketing level of income and wealth inequality, overturning the Citizen United Supreme Court decision, climate change and the many more problems facing our Nation.
That is way beyond the Republican game plan to block, stymie, shut down and essentially decimate our current form of government!
These positions are inconceivable and beyond "radical" in today's world of right wing dominated America, would the voters even consider such fantasies? Imagine
Their ability to dismiss the falsehoods of climate change, their popular goals such as; abolishing the Affordable Care Act, eliminating Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, replacing the VA with "vouchers" and shutting down most of our Government, has been an inspiration to their many supporters and voters!
You may also consider evaluating the "extreme" positions of the one "radical" Democratic running for office, Bernie Sanders!
He intends to actually address and attempt to solve our nations problems through legislation! He has advocated making state schools tuition-free for all, in part by passing a tax on financial transactions.
Contemplate an administration that offers legislative solutions to our current problems of lingering unemployment, immigration reform, crumbling infrastructure, skyrocketing level of income and wealth inequality, overturning the Citizen United Supreme Court decision, climate change and the many more problems facing our Nation.
That is way beyond the Republican game plan to block, stymie, shut down and essentially decimate our current form of government!
These positions are inconceivable and beyond "radical" in today's world of right wing dominated America, would the voters even consider such fantasies? Imagine
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Gail, you failed to address Trump's latest insult to Carly Fiorina and women in general. It's front and center on The Guardian's website but no where to be found on the NYT's, for shame. On Wednesday, he was quoted during an interview with Rolling Stone as saying; "Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president? I mean, she’s a woman, and I’m not supposed to say bad things, but really, folks, come on. Are we serious?”
How can any woman even THINK of voting for this jerk (and I'm being kind, what I really want to say would never get past the screener). Why isn't this being covered by the NYT's? The man is beyond repulsive...
How can any woman even THINK of voting for this jerk (and I'm being kind, what I really want to say would never get past the screener). Why isn't this being covered by the NYT's? The man is beyond repulsive...
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Trump must not look in the mirror or look at photos of himself to see his ugly puss.
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Not being covered due to Ms. Dowd's affection for Donald.
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I wouldn't vote for Trump if you held my hand in a fire BUT -- the beauty of his "candidacy" is that he's more obnoxious, more bullying, more boorish, more crass etc. than all of the other Repugs -- he's also more "honest" because he's saying the stuff that they are thinking and none of them can criticize him for it because if they did == he'd level his aim at them and expose them further as the dirtballs that they are. His comment that he doesn't respect most people because they don't deserve respect is the MO of the GOP -- they hate and demean and disparage everyone except themselves because in their eyes, no one is worthy of a second thought. We only need to look at the record of the Repugs in Congress over the past seven years -- spitting in the eye of the American public every chance they get -- same MO of the Repugs on the Supreme Court. The Citizens United decision is the ultimate "spit in your face" moment bought and paid for by the rightwing 1% and wholly backed by the GOP.
Missed you Gail Collins..must you ask such tough questions ?
Who should be thrown out to suit twice fired Carly Fiorina ? One advice to her tone down that several layers of glossy lipstick which might be too distracting. Showing a few wrinkles seems to be more appropriates to tell the voters you are one of them and care.
Who should be thrown out..Ben Carson highly educated yet denying evolution is scary. Is Ted Cruz American with Cuban father , born in Canada ? He sounds like Mr. Haney in Green Acres. Jeb or John is boring, so is Huckabee who is loony...
On now I feel exhausted..to list all of them.
Who should be thrown out to suit twice fired Carly Fiorina ? One advice to her tone down that several layers of glossy lipstick which might be too distracting. Showing a few wrinkles seems to be more appropriates to tell the voters you are one of them and care.
Who should be thrown out..Ben Carson highly educated yet denying evolution is scary. Is Ted Cruz American with Cuban father , born in Canada ? He sounds like Mr. Haney in Green Acres. Jeb or John is boring, so is Huckabee who is loony...
On now I feel exhausted..to list all of them.
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Oh, Gail, how I've missed you! Welcome back, and whatever book you've written or still writing, I'll get it.
I'll get it because you get it--in your unique fashion. This is honestly the first time I've truly laughed about what's passing for an endless summer in our body politic.
JEB! was about as lackluster as ever on Colbert's debut, looking like an anxious puppy about to get smacked again. If that's energy, you can have it. I wish Colbert were in a position to really grill him...like on the "everything old is new again" tax plan he announced yesterday. His timing was impeccable for sure.
I frankly don't get the surge for Carson. I have such a hard time believing his fantastic list of medical accomplishments when I listen to what he's saying now. It goes beyond naivete--his views on anything scientific are really astounding. Did he go straight to medical school, bypassing geology and the history of scientific ideas?
I'm sure to Europeans, if they feel like taking the time to seriously look at the baker's dozen of candidates, must wonder how American lost its collective sanity in just a few short years. The fact that so many--pols and their audiences--seem to have forgotten whatever they were taught (if they were) about constitutional law, the founding of our nation, basic science, and economics 101, is really embarrassing.
America the beautiful has morphed into America the dumb. And getting dumber with each passing day.
I'll get it because you get it--in your unique fashion. This is honestly the first time I've truly laughed about what's passing for an endless summer in our body politic.
JEB! was about as lackluster as ever on Colbert's debut, looking like an anxious puppy about to get smacked again. If that's energy, you can have it. I wish Colbert were in a position to really grill him...like on the "everything old is new again" tax plan he announced yesterday. His timing was impeccable for sure.
I frankly don't get the surge for Carson. I have such a hard time believing his fantastic list of medical accomplishments when I listen to what he's saying now. It goes beyond naivete--his views on anything scientific are really astounding. Did he go straight to medical school, bypassing geology and the history of scientific ideas?
I'm sure to Europeans, if they feel like taking the time to seriously look at the baker's dozen of candidates, must wonder how American lost its collective sanity in just a few short years. The fact that so many--pols and their audiences--seem to have forgotten whatever they were taught (if they were) about constitutional law, the founding of our nation, basic science, and economics 101, is really embarrassing.
America the beautiful has morphed into America the dumb. And getting dumber with each passing day.
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Christine, I can assure your that Europeans are taking the time to look at the baker's dozen of our candidates by reading French, British and German papers on a regular basis.
But, and that is a big but, they are not doing it seriously. They ridicule the low-information and low education general population of the US that made it possible to elect a B-movie actor to do his acting as President of the US, and years later the bumbling 'Decider' who was rewarded with the presidency courtesy of our Supreme Court.
The press buzz abroad even from center right publications - although those center right ones would be considered in this country by the right as being akin to the Prada - , is nothing but laughter and ridicule about the assembled wannabe presidential contenders of the Republican party.
But, and that is a big but, they are not doing it seriously. They ridicule the low-information and low education general population of the US that made it possible to elect a B-movie actor to do his acting as President of the US, and years later the bumbling 'Decider' who was rewarded with the presidency courtesy of our Supreme Court.
The press buzz abroad even from center right publications - although those center right ones would be considered in this country by the right as being akin to the Prada - , is nothing but laughter and ridicule about the assembled wannabe presidential contenders of the Republican party.
1
That is the Koch's brothers goal, America the dumb.
We can maybe understand interest in Ben Carson. Surely, to be his neurosurgeon self he must have a steady hand. Maybe people are also banking on his head to be steady as well. But we can't have him too calm yet because it seems Americans are looking for a pretty good free rowdy show these days on those campaign stages.
On the other hand, from campaigns of old, John McCain had to wonder how he ever got near Sarah Palin and the idea of sharing the White House with her; I mean, unicorns? With as much hate in her for President Obama, that she still carries with her, these Republican Christians could maybe say a few prayers for Sarah. Come on, Mr. Huckabee - perhaps you could start a prayer ring for Sarah with Ms. Kim Davis in charge. Just raise your hands, let people be strong, and bring Sarah down from the unicorn ring. Let John McCain become somewhat unembarrassed (out of respect).
We cannot imagine if Sarah had been in office with Senator McCain and become angry with him. What indeed would she have concocted as his imaginary image? Maybe even a unicorn would have been mild in her wrath had she come any closer to McCain. She's still Sarah the Scary.
Well, people did come to their senses with the McCain/Palin ticket in the end. Maybe they will come to their senses at the polls with these other ---- I guess we could just call them --- candidates (for now).
On the other hand, from campaigns of old, John McCain had to wonder how he ever got near Sarah Palin and the idea of sharing the White House with her; I mean, unicorns? With as much hate in her for President Obama, that she still carries with her, these Republican Christians could maybe say a few prayers for Sarah. Come on, Mr. Huckabee - perhaps you could start a prayer ring for Sarah with Ms. Kim Davis in charge. Just raise your hands, let people be strong, and bring Sarah down from the unicorn ring. Let John McCain become somewhat unembarrassed (out of respect).
We cannot imagine if Sarah had been in office with Senator McCain and become angry with him. What indeed would she have concocted as his imaginary image? Maybe even a unicorn would have been mild in her wrath had she come any closer to McCain. She's still Sarah the Scary.
Well, people did come to their senses with the McCain/Palin ticket in the end. Maybe they will come to their senses at the polls with these other ---- I guess we could just call them --- candidates (for now).
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Welcome back. And just in time. I, for one, was starting to worry that the Republican lineup was going to be taken seriously.
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Welcome back Gail! Praised be! Now get to work, you gave a lot if republican garbage to wade through and dissect. Happy hunting!
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You were so very missed! Glad to have you back to brighten the depressing morning news read. You are awesome.
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Gail, I could write a book on why Ben Carson would make a horrible president. Frankly, the guy impresses as some kind of idiot savant who knows everything about neurosurgery and very little about anything else.
I know -- A person's religious affiliation isn't supposed to affect electability. However, Carson's naivity when talking about "God" and some of evangelicals' other favorite topics can be especially disturbing.
It would be one thing if he merely sounded as if he'd just walked out of a Baptist Sunday School. But does he have to sound like a member of its "kindergarten" class?
I know -- A person's religious affiliation isn't supposed to affect electability. However, Carson's naivity when talking about "God" and some of evangelicals' other favorite topics can be especially disturbing.
It would be one thing if he merely sounded as if he'd just walked out of a Baptist Sunday School. But does he have to sound like a member of its "kindergarten" class?
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Yes but you have to hand it to him that he does have the solution to gun violence: instill better values in our people.
After suffering through the Huckabee/Davis spectacle in KY, reminiscent of an old-time tent revival, and Huck's rants Wednesday on every talk show in the universe, I'm praying I don't have to endure another minute of the man.
Huckabee's ignorance of Separation of Church and State is astonishing.
Huckabee's ignorance of Separation of Church and State is astonishing.
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Where is Sinclair Lewis when you really need him? Huckabee's grotesque display seems less a product of woeful ignorance than naked ambition to me.
Was anybody else reminded of the movie and play "Inherit the Wind" upon seeing that scene.
And frightening.
Interesting to watch Cruz muscled away from the Huckabee spectacle - each of them trying to keep the lead in the race for top evangenital....no sic. Great to have you back!
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This is truly historic, but not in a good way. It is historic because it raises the question of whether, in the history of our country, there has ever emerged a more hapless set of grifters seeking the highest office in the land?
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"hapless set of grifters" Good line!
Hey Gail, we missed you, it's been a while since we have heard your voice. I would love to read something about the book tour.
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What a republican line-up of reality TV stars! It really is a shame Sarah Palin can't get in on this. Oh well....
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Gail! What about Bobby J, the invisible candidate?
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I fear Bobby Jindal has been "disappeared" into one of those "no-go" zones he warned us about.
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Not even worth mentioning, he's that insignificant.
She's back! Yay! And just in time....
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What a joy to get the wit, wisdom, and sheer fun of Gail Collins back after these long months!
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My fervent wish is that each of them finds a favorite billionaire or two which will assure they'll be able to stay in the race for many more months of entertainment. And Gail, couldn't you have snuck in at least one little anecdote about Rick "Oops" Perry? And it's too bad that Herman Cain hasn't joined the fray but that would might take things right over the top. Clown car, indeed....
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Welcome back! (Where in the God's green earth have you been, not that it is any of my business, but, I was beginning to think you slipped and fell in the butter cow?) "Just four months to the Iowa caucuses!" I have decided to support "Bernie"! I'm sure I will hear about it from the girls, but I tried. It was when she said, "like with a cloth...." That did it for me.
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I want a woman president before I die and I'm hoping I have at least 15 years left. But I don't want Hillary and I don't want Carly. I want Amy Klobuchar or Kristen Gellibrand.
Hillary has really, really done serious damage to herself. All self-inflicted. She should be riding high right now and I'm sorry she is not, but it also makes me very angry at her, that because of her need for secrecy and self-protection we may get a Republican. And that is very scary to me.
Hillary has really, really done serious damage to herself. All self-inflicted. She should be riding high right now and I'm sorry she is not, but it also makes me very angry at her, that because of her need for secrecy and self-protection we may get a Republican. And that is very scary to me.
Best part of the column? No mention whatsoever of Santorum. Brilliant!
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Rubio's and Jindal's strategy apparently is to bypass the spacetime continuum, and find a wormhole connected directly to the Presidency.
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Welcome back Ms. Collins!
First rate column as always, except for one point. If you had been reading the comments in this paper, especially those of one Larry Eisenberg, you would know that Jeb! is actually short for Jebenezer. The exclamation point is to thank his parents for not naming him Thomas Gradgrind.
First rate column as always, except for one point. If you had been reading the comments in this paper, especially those of one Larry Eisenberg, you would know that Jeb! is actually short for Jebenezer. The exclamation point is to thank his parents for not naming him Thomas Gradgrind.
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Or Jebrina, since he's "the smart one" of Poppy's Angels.
Gail does giggles again. Strange, Gemli returns at the same time. And the NYT carries another article on candidates (for evolutionary classification) on the front page. Do all of the GOP POTUS hopefuls fit the classification of hominids, or have some evolved as high as hominins? Trump's hair suggests a more orangutan-ish trait, but his gibberings and social history put him closer to bonobos.
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Gail is back! Yay!
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Gail, I think you're brilliant, but come on, William Shatner is NOT irritating.
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I've always liked William Shatner. I find myself wishing William Shatner could run for President, but he was born in Canada. Although Ted Cruz doesn't seem to think that's an obstacle.
We'll have to agree to disagree on that. Every time one of Shatner's godawful commercials come on TV, I can't change the channel fast enough to get me away from him. Ugh.
And unlike Tom Cruise and the Republican candidates, he doesn't go around propagating nutty ideas about religion.
Thank God you are back, Gail! ( Sorry for the ! )
Now, would you consider running for president? Nobody, to my mind, has as much editorial experience on a variety of topics than you! And you are truly an outsider. Plus, wouldn't it be fun to put some humor in the White House? Plus, we know your real first name already.
Gail for President! You have my endorsement!
Now, would you consider running for president? Nobody, to my mind, has as much editorial experience on a variety of topics than you! And you are truly an outsider. Plus, wouldn't it be fun to put some humor in the White House? Plus, we know your real first name already.
Gail for President! You have my endorsement!
17
So glad Gail Collins is back! How would we get through primary season without her?
12
is the Godfather Pizza guy still in the race or it was the 2012 election. It is hard to keep up. One thing I learned don't ever make Chris Christy mad any anyone.
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While I enjoy the satire and how you manage to poke fun and disclose the insane and impractical things these candidates stand for, it is still a very sad and grave commentary on the state of American politics and in particular the Republican Party. None of these people should even be in the conversation to become President of the United States. Running on a know nothing agenda that relies not on science but bible quotes that feed the base , xenophobia, homophobia and of course to quote John Bush's Dad, " voodoo economics". Tried, tested , failed too many times to count yet still invoked in the name of their patron Saint Ronald Reagan who campaigned on states rights and governmental excess yet increased the deficit more than any other President in history. When will the American electorate wake up and realize these people and their party do not in any manner represent anything other than their own self interest and that of the top one percenters!
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Welcome back. We missed your humor. And, of course, the story about Mittens and the dog on top of the car. But I am sure there is a skeleton in the closet of one of these outstanding GOP candidates that will equal or perhaps surpass the brilliance of the dog on top of the car.
There is so much to write about this election season that I think your column should be twice as long as currently. Dr Carson really doesn't believe in evolution? Hmm.
There is so much to write about this election season that I think your column should be twice as long as currently. Dr Carson really doesn't believe in evolution? Hmm.
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Yes Jordan, that brain Dr. Carson operates with is unevolved.
Not to upset the old liberal applecart, Jordan, but maybe Carson just has trouble with the classical version of evolution....you know, the one that explains all the changes as random and fittest.
I've always thought that a mindless stretch. Maybe Carson thinks the Lamarckian "Intendedness" hypothesis makes more sense. I know I do.
Hmmm. You Libs ought to open your mind to more Politically Incorrect ideas.
I've always thought that a mindless stretch. Maybe Carson thinks the Lamarckian "Intendedness" hypothesis makes more sense. I know I do.
Hmmm. You Libs ought to open your mind to more Politically Incorrect ideas.
Unfortunately, our friends only seem to expect an update about the presidential campaign in the same gossipy terms as we would discuss Tom Brady rumors.
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Gail,
You give them way too much credit. The GOP candidates are not as intelligent or caring as you paint them.
You give them way too much credit. The GOP candidates are not as intelligent or caring as you paint them.
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I missed you Gail! Thankfully, you are back just in time to bring your deadpan wit to our dreadfully dreary presidential election political narrative.
Although you were absent our discontented summer of Trump, hopefully, with the leaves soon to turn and the frigid wind approaching the farms of Iowa and the hills of New Hampshire, your intelligent writing will lift our spirits during the upcoming winter of what will be an "interesting" time; interesting, that is, as the Chinese curse.
Although you were absent our discontented summer of Trump, hopefully, with the leaves soon to turn and the frigid wind approaching the farms of Iowa and the hills of New Hampshire, your intelligent writing will lift our spirits during the upcoming winter of what will be an "interesting" time; interesting, that is, as the Chinese curse.
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Welcome Back!
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Indeed! You were sorely missed.
Ih this is the best the Republican Party has to offer it is going to be a primary race to see who can do best being dumb, illogical and catering to the worse element in the party.
I think it says it all when Donald Trump, the billionaire that thinks a military academy equals being in the military, is in first place with Ben Carson , a neurosurgeon who made it through medical school without believing in evolution or homosexuality (it is a choice according to him), in second.
At this point I have no faith in any kind of good government and I can see the mainstream media is just along for the ride, and we will all sink lower into nastiness and ignorance until our country falls apart.
I think it says it all when Donald Trump, the billionaire that thinks a military academy equals being in the military, is in first place with Ben Carson , a neurosurgeon who made it through medical school without believing in evolution or homosexuality (it is a choice according to him), in second.
At this point I have no faith in any kind of good government and I can see the mainstream media is just along for the ride, and we will all sink lower into nastiness and ignorance until our country falls apart.
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Lily
Ben Carson is further proof that one doesn't have to be highly intelligent to be a doctor: what is important is having a good memory. As for surgeons , they require good hand-eye coordination and manual dexterity. Nothing against physicians but don't expect too much of them in the brains and political judgment departments.
Ben Carson is further proof that one doesn't have to be highly intelligent to be a doctor: what is important is having a good memory. As for surgeons , they require good hand-eye coordination and manual dexterity. Nothing against physicians but don't expect too much of them in the brains and political judgment departments.
Good government is being managed by the man in the White House and a number of others in his party.
Democrats might be beholden to some of the same big money to get elected, but they do believe in the theory of good government and understand that it is that government (aided by the Constitution) that makes America exceptional.
Democrats might be beholden to some of the same big money to get elected, but they do believe in the theory of good government and understand that it is that government (aided by the Constitution) that makes America exceptional.
Gail,
You are back! Life hasn't been the same without you! And look what a rich stew of politics you have returned to! Republican debaters! The Donald! Government shut-downs! (Thursday and Saturday) Mornings in America will be bright again!
You are back! Life hasn't been the same without you! And look what a rich stew of politics you have returned to! Republican debaters! The Donald! Government shut-downs! (Thursday and Saturday) Mornings in America will be bright again!
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There is still more than a year to go until the election. You know things are bad when I'm already so exhausted by the presidential race that I almost passed up a Gail Collins column on that subject.
Imagine if all the energy spent on this election had been directed instead toward -- for example -- rebuilding infrastructure so that one need not fear crossing American bridges or be embarrassed by the state of many of our airports and transportation systems. Or educating our children so that they grow up understanding that Kim Davis is undermining our Constitution, not bolstering it. Oh well.
Imagine if all the energy spent on this election had been directed instead toward -- for example -- rebuilding infrastructure so that one need not fear crossing American bridges or be embarrassed by the state of many of our airports and transportation systems. Or educating our children so that they grow up understanding that Kim Davis is undermining our Constitution, not bolstering it. Oh well.
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Let them expend all the energy they want so there's no energy left when the real election starts. It's all the money being spent that is the obscenity. It's the energy of the populous I'm worried about. By November 2016 what enthusiasm will any of us have left that will drag us to the voting booths? Politics is such a dreadful business in this country.
Hi Gail, how I missed you...we need all the humor and insight you give us to get us through these dark times.
Hi Gail, how I missed you...we need all the humor and insight you give us to get us through these dark times.
The thing is this though: There are 10 Republicans who are head and shoulders better than anyone running on the Dem side.
The Dems are old, white, socialist, under criminal investigation and corrupt. That's quite a bunch. Where's Gail's article on these mutants?
The Dems are old, white, socialist, under criminal investigation and corrupt. That's quite a bunch. Where's Gail's article on these mutants?
3
Uh, Texas A&M guy cheerleader, Viet Nam dodger Oops Perry is actually under felony indictment.
Governor Bridgeghazi teeters closer every day.
Third Bush should still be in a federal joint for corrupting the 2000 election.
The entire inner circle of the administration of Andover Prep guy cheerleader, Viet Nam dodger Boy George should be on a plane to Den Hague for war crimes.
The record is held by Eureka College guy cheerleader, WW II dodger Reagan. 138 Reaganauts went to federal prison,
Governor Bridgeghazi teeters closer every day.
Third Bush should still be in a federal joint for corrupting the 2000 election.
The entire inner circle of the administration of Andover Prep guy cheerleader, Viet Nam dodger Boy George should be on a plane to Den Hague for war crimes.
The record is held by Eureka College guy cheerleader, WW II dodger Reagan. 138 Reaganauts went to federal prison,
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OK. Corrupt Democrats? Name names and give proof, or shut up! Every single Republican from south of Long Island Sound and west of the Hudson belongs on a gallows. And that doesn't begin to deal with "Republicans" in NYC.
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This comment is satirical right? I mean it HAS to be satirical. How about we leave the really good satire for Gail?
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Great to have you back Gail!
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Glad to have you back, Ms. Collins. Far too much material out there to do without you.
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Do not confuse surgeons with scientists. Many good surgeons are fundamentalists.
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Scientists seek truth. Surgeons follow procedures. BIG difference.
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True enough, but all the same, a surgeon who doesn't believe in evolution is a bit like a car mechanic who doesn't believe in internal combustion.
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That's because when they enter the inner chambers of the masterpiece human body they realize there's no way that it could have evolved.
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It's very difficult for me to imagine any of these candidates (Maybe John Kasich) as actually getting the nomination. The fact that one of them actually will, most likely Jeb! who certainly doesn't deserve the !, is quite terrifying. In the meantime, I demand to see Cruz's birth certificate. The wealthy certainly have a big stake in this election. The low-income and politically illiterate who will cast a Republican vote don't seem to understand that any gains secured for them by Mr. Obama will be lost. Quite possibly however, the ACA will just be renamed rather than infuriate the redneck base....perhaps W-care.
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I'd be willing to vote for Kasich if he promises that when his daughters are old enough to serve they will enlist in the military to fight in the new conflict that he promises to get us into in the mid-east. He's like most of the other candidates, including Hillary, who are willing to give the blood of other peoples' children to fight wars but not that of their own children.
John Kasich is a theocrat that could, in his 'moderate' way slip way more religion into the United States. I am very wary of the Christians running who want religion not only in our government but they want a STATE religion of their own version of Christianity. I don't want a christian form of sharia to ever get the upper hand of our government and John Kasich could do that. Be very wary of John Kasich, people!
Kasich is a wolf in sheep clothing, trying to be the "moderate" one & stand out from the crowd of decidedly immoderate clowns. Don't be fooled.
Gail it is really great to see you back.
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Welcome back, Gail! You have been missed during this long summer of such foolishness and embarrassing behavior by all Republican candidates. Hoping to see similar analysis of the Dems whose front runner doesn't look so hot right now either. As a senior citizen I am appalled by the ignorance and/or venality of our candidates overall. Watching this country tumble into a free fall of greed, prejudices, hostility, anti-science, and inequality has been a disheartening experience. Remembering the old line from the radio program The Shadow, "No one knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men," I see now that indeed we do know. And high percentages of those of us who vote, a way too low percentage of our citizens, are enthusiastically supporting one of more of these people grievously ill-suited to be president. The return of your astute analysis injected with humor is soooooo welcome!
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"Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The Shadow knows."
But best was the closing line, "The weed of crime bears bitter fruit, Margot."
And it is so wonderful to have you back, Gail! You have been sorely missed during this very silly season.
But best was the closing line, "The weed of crime bears bitter fruit, Margot."
And it is so wonderful to have you back, Gail! You have been sorely missed during this very silly season.
6
"similar analysis of the Dems whose front runner doesn't look so hot right now either."
A lot of think Bernie is real hot, and he is the front runner who never gets any press.
Gail, do some columns on Bernie.
A lot of think Bernie is real hot, and he is the front runner who never gets any press.
Gail, do some columns on Bernie.
The weed of crime bears a bitter fruit, the Shadow knows --- and so does Gail
1
Gail Collins and Stephen Colbert back in the same week! We've missed you!
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Welcome back Gail. If I weren't laughing I'd be crying
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welcome back, Gail! missed you sooo much!
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Welcome back, Ms. Collins. Your wit was missed, very missed.
19
Welcome back Gail! Nobody analyzes this bunch of clowns running for the highest office in the land better than you do.
33
Dear Ms. Collins,
Welcome back although you were gone, perhaps, too long; really, the campaign is getting serious?
Maybe it is; Mr. Huckabee showed up at a rally for Kim Davis claiming he would "go to jail" for any amount of time for what he believed in at the moment. Right now, he believes showing up and getting noticed ANYWHERE beats hanging around in Donald Trump's shadow.
And Mr. Trump is becoming more "political"; I don't think he's insulted any ethnic, feminine or minority group in at least two days unless one calls his screaming about the "Iran Threat" a swipe at Iranians, it being the GOP/TP/KOCH AFFILIATE's issue de jour.
Jeb was on the Late Show without David Letterman and managed to spend a lot of time proving he's as exciting to watch as paint drying.
Mr. Walker owns a Harley so HE's got the "Hell's Angel" vote almost certainly locked up.
Mr. Carson is a scientist just born in the wrong era. 14th or 15th Century science just may be his "thing", you know, changing lead to gold, burning heretics and ignoring evolution.
Ms. Fiorina is still running? Thanks for the tip!
As for the rest of the male attendees at the Republican "Scrum For President", well guys, good luck with that whatever the "that" is which you are trying to promote; immigration one day, anti gay marriage the next, invading Cuba for at least two of them and Mr. Kasich just trying to poll better than "Deez Nuts".
It's a perplexing time for voters; lots of folks running, none of them real candidates!
Welcome back although you were gone, perhaps, too long; really, the campaign is getting serious?
Maybe it is; Mr. Huckabee showed up at a rally for Kim Davis claiming he would "go to jail" for any amount of time for what he believed in at the moment. Right now, he believes showing up and getting noticed ANYWHERE beats hanging around in Donald Trump's shadow.
And Mr. Trump is becoming more "political"; I don't think he's insulted any ethnic, feminine or minority group in at least two days unless one calls his screaming about the "Iran Threat" a swipe at Iranians, it being the GOP/TP/KOCH AFFILIATE's issue de jour.
Jeb was on the Late Show without David Letterman and managed to spend a lot of time proving he's as exciting to watch as paint drying.
Mr. Walker owns a Harley so HE's got the "Hell's Angel" vote almost certainly locked up.
Mr. Carson is a scientist just born in the wrong era. 14th or 15th Century science just may be his "thing", you know, changing lead to gold, burning heretics and ignoring evolution.
Ms. Fiorina is still running? Thanks for the tip!
As for the rest of the male attendees at the Republican "Scrum For President", well guys, good luck with that whatever the "that" is which you are trying to promote; immigration one day, anti gay marriage the next, invading Cuba for at least two of them and Mr. Kasich just trying to poll better than "Deez Nuts".
It's a perplexing time for voters; lots of folks running, none of them real candidates!
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Well....Trump just made very disparaging remarks about Carly in a Rolling Stone article. So there's that. Of course, he was very crude and rude about it and had no business commenting on anyone's appearance, especially not the only female in the R field. But it did make me laugh - because I agree with him about Carly. But it's her snarky personality that causes me to want to run away from her...and that shows on her face. It's what is inside coming out that is ugly.
So glad you're back....and not a moment too soon! We've missed you!
18
Rand Paul is not even mentioned by name. Is the mainstream media doing what they did to Ron Paul last time to Rand this time. We do not have a John Stewart this time to mock the media for turning Ron Paul into the "13th floor" and pretending he does not exist. But nyt at least is supposed to have an intelligent and we'll aware audience who can notice such omissions by the media.
3
Why would Paul be mentioned? He has no chance of winning and he hasn't said or done anything interesting or entertaining lately.
"The libertarian who doesn't believe in reproductive rights."
What else do you really need to know about Rand Paul, as this negates everything else he claims to stand for. Although it's no mean feat to make Barry Goldwater look reasonable in comparison, I'll grant you that.
What else do you really need to know about Rand Paul, as this negates everything else he claims to stand for. Although it's no mean feat to make Barry Goldwater look reasonable in comparison, I'll grant you that.
Thank God you're back! We need you. America needs you.
All summer, every time Trump erupted with another bilious bloviation, I said to myself, we all did: 'Where's Gail when we need her?'
All summer, every time Trump erupted with another bilious bloviation, I said to myself, we all did: 'Where's Gail when we need her?'
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Gail, you are so unfair. What about Pataki?? Give your fellow NY'er some love.
22
Welcome back, Ms. Collins, you were missed and I hope you had some time off to recharge your batteries, while writing your book. Please keep us posted at leisure and enjoyed this early morning your update on the list of this political knot of toads.
In speaking to a family friend at Versailles who lived WWII, she asked about our presidential elections and I told her it was a mess. Have you heard of Trump, the big fat business man I asked, who leaves no opinion unexpressed? I started to mention as an example some of his comments on bloodshed, but decided against it, while she inquired about a Bush. He's his brother, she exclaimed! Wait and see, we're going to vote for this infamous name in a weak suit. We always go Republican. 'I like Mrs. Clinton'. So do I, but Americans do not like her despite her strength and experience, her character.
Carson goes up against the theory of Evolution, so does Cohane, my father in his Paradox, proving that our ancestors were extra-terrestrials. Pops, however, was not running for the Presidency although he was far more passionate and charismatic than Trump or John Bush, and I can see the twinkle in his eye, had I asked if any of our superior ancestors were black.
Better to laugh than to cry, while a helpful reminder from you, to fasten our seat belts. We're in for a rum time of it either way, and I hope as an American that I am not right about this.
In speaking to a family friend at Versailles who lived WWII, she asked about our presidential elections and I told her it was a mess. Have you heard of Trump, the big fat business man I asked, who leaves no opinion unexpressed? I started to mention as an example some of his comments on bloodshed, but decided against it, while she inquired about a Bush. He's his brother, she exclaimed! Wait and see, we're going to vote for this infamous name in a weak suit. We always go Republican. 'I like Mrs. Clinton'. So do I, but Americans do not like her despite her strength and experience, her character.
Carson goes up against the theory of Evolution, so does Cohane, my father in his Paradox, proving that our ancestors were extra-terrestrials. Pops, however, was not running for the Presidency although he was far more passionate and charismatic than Trump or John Bush, and I can see the twinkle in his eye, had I asked if any of our superior ancestors were black.
Better to laugh than to cry, while a helpful reminder from you, to fasten our seat belts. We're in for a rum time of it either way, and I hope as an American that I am not right about this.
24
There should be a law passed to prevent Gail Collins from writing a book during presidental election season!
Then again, unfortunately, electon seaon runs for years now!
Then again, unfortunately, electon seaon runs for years now!
Welcome back Gail. We missed your take on Chris Christy's apparent bar code, conveyor belt, identification system for illegal immigrants, Jeb! Bush's admiration for slave owning,Mexico invading president, James Knox Polk, "The Donald's"various "secret"plans to fix stuff,including the bombing of Iraqi oil fields, Scott Walkers briefing by George W. Bush's "Iraq foreign policy experts", and the mysterious disappearance of Marco Rubio.
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Welcome back Gail; missed your satirical sense of humor!
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We missed you Gail. Glad your back!
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You forgot to mention that at least none of the Republican candidates tied a dog to the roof of their car.
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I picture future generations of historians, poring over ancient documents (Gail Collins columns) trying to understand the importance of this strange political rite that garnered so much attention in the media - presidential candidates tying dogs to car roofs.
1
that we know of, anyway...
Not yet, at least.
1
Thank goodness you're back... You've been missed.
14
Jeb is so dull I am not sure he is even still in the race. Trump may punch himself out soon but right now he is getting all the attention.
14
Oh how I've missed you! Welcome back!
17
Glad Gail is back as someone has to make sense of the amalgam of goobers running for the GOP's chance to be crushed at the next elections. I hope it is Huckster and I hope he and Hillary get to debate about the out of control libido that all the ladies have for Uncle Sugar, that would be as sweet as the Huckster himself. Yahoo, we are going to have us a shindig of Stupid. I think Scott Walker just proved he is the king of the Stupids, "out there", I only wish he was the one who crashed his union made motor bike that somehow square man Scott thinks makes him cool- yea cool as the scores of dentists who ride Harley's on the weekends when they aren't irradiating heads to see the teeth that are in front of their faces. Stupid is a winner for the GOP this fall, but which one is the most stupid of all? Very hard to say definitely at this stage because there is just so much on offer.
14
All in good fun, I guess. However, the mere fact that this whole presidential campaign circus is happening speaks volumes about who we have become as a nation. The myth that either conservatives or progressives are going to emerge from any national election season with a "winner-take-all" mandate is what drives a lot of this nonsense. It also poisons the well when it comes time to govern.
At this point in time, the Democrats seem the saner of the two parties, but I think that the two party system is dead and it's time to turn off the life support. Whatever emerges may be better or worse, but right now the only things happening are what President Obama is doing on his own or with the Senate. That is not a sustainable model for governance.
Maybe the presence of some of these candidates will hasten the inevitable.
At this point in time, the Democrats seem the saner of the two parties, but I think that the two party system is dead and it's time to turn off the life support. Whatever emerges may be better or worse, but right now the only things happening are what President Obama is doing on his own or with the Senate. That is not a sustainable model for governance.
Maybe the presence of some of these candidates will hasten the inevitable.
253
The problem with destroying the two-party system is that it's going to be like getting out of the bottom of a gravity well. A semi-viable third party all but guarantees a loss to whichever side of the political divide it most resembles (see, e.g., both Ross Perot and Ralph Nader, as well as current Republican fears re: Trump).
In order to break that dynamic, we may need to upend the system itself, but with the political well as poisoned as it is it's hard to see how we build anything more sensible. Even if only one party tries to do an end run around democracy via gerrymandering and the like, the other party is apt to get into the act out of self defense, if nothing else.
And if we go deeper still, flat-out revolutions tend to have a poor rate for positive outcomes. Also, some of our electorate might be getting to the point of "taking back [our/their] country" by force of arms. It seems to have quietly occurred to a lot of people in the last decade that democracy's only great if your side has a chance of winning. If we're restructuring the whole political system, extremists on either side have a real shot at marginalizing the other.
So....
Screwed up as it is, maybe we can let the system stagger along for now? We may arrive at a place where reforms can be made without having to knock the system down first.
It's not great, but it beats civil war.
In order to break that dynamic, we may need to upend the system itself, but with the political well as poisoned as it is it's hard to see how we build anything more sensible. Even if only one party tries to do an end run around democracy via gerrymandering and the like, the other party is apt to get into the act out of self defense, if nothing else.
And if we go deeper still, flat-out revolutions tend to have a poor rate for positive outcomes. Also, some of our electorate might be getting to the point of "taking back [our/their] country" by force of arms. It seems to have quietly occurred to a lot of people in the last decade that democracy's only great if your side has a chance of winning. If we're restructuring the whole political system, extremists on either side have a real shot at marginalizing the other.
So....
Screwed up as it is, maybe we can let the system stagger along for now? We may arrive at a place where reforms can be made without having to knock the system down first.
It's not great, but it beats civil war.
Anyone else up for a 3rd term for Obama???
Welcome back, Gail, we have missed you. As an educated secularist, I will vote for a theocratic republican when they invent time travel. It somewhat alarming that I find The Donald to be the most engaging rider on the 17 seat circus clown bus. He can be repulsive, but I don't consider him brain dead. He is the only person the bus that would consider rating taxes or enhancing social security. As a retired Air Force officer and Vietnam vet, with a son who served 27 months in Iraq, and a daughter who retired with a DOD Sustained Superior Service medal, I think that all Vietnam draft dodgers should be mute on military matters.
760
Just as important - every presidential candidate who has no loved ones in the U.S. military should vow that he or she would not start any war or war-like action unless there is a direct danger to the United States.
2
I served as a naval officer during the Korean war, and I fail to see why draft dodgers should be mute about military maters. If everybody dodged the draft, here and abroad, the world would a much better place than it is now.
8
Jimbo,
I greatly appreciate and applaud the service given by you and others in your family. However, I disagree with your conclusion.
Military intervention in Vietnam was a terrible mistake. We knew it then; we know it now. So was the Iraq War. While soldiers who served in the Vietnam War were "patriotic," those who opposed the war and "dodged" the draft were also acting with great patriotism. And the latter had a much better understanding of the issues involved.
It was honorable and correct to avoid serving in Vietnam; one might say that the greatest "hero" of the Vietnam War was John Kerry, who fought in it but also was intelligent and courageous enough to come home and demonstrate against it.
What we should NOT do is listen to those people who avoided service in wars when they advocate for new, ridiculous, unjustified wars. I do not condemn the Republican politicians' avoidance of service in Vietnam; I condemn their idiocy and venality in arguing for wars like those in Iraq (past) and Iran (future).
I greatly appreciate and applaud the service given by you and others in your family. However, I disagree with your conclusion.
Military intervention in Vietnam was a terrible mistake. We knew it then; we know it now. So was the Iraq War. While soldiers who served in the Vietnam War were "patriotic," those who opposed the war and "dodged" the draft were also acting with great patriotism. And the latter had a much better understanding of the issues involved.
It was honorable and correct to avoid serving in Vietnam; one might say that the greatest "hero" of the Vietnam War was John Kerry, who fought in it but also was intelligent and courageous enough to come home and demonstrate against it.
What we should NOT do is listen to those people who avoided service in wars when they advocate for new, ridiculous, unjustified wars. I do not condemn the Republican politicians' avoidance of service in Vietnam; I condemn their idiocy and venality in arguing for wars like those in Iraq (past) and Iran (future).
2
"But Carson really doesn’t believe in evolution. And he is, you know, a scientist."
Actually, he's not a scientist. He's a physician. There is a large difference.
Actually, he's not a scientist. He's a physician. There is a large difference.
54
Doctors are heavily schooled in the sciences, biology and chemistry come to mind so even though Carson is technically NOT a scientist by profession I think it is safe to state that he has more scientific background than say, a truck driver or a business manager. He willfully ignores all the science required for him to become a physician. That makes him more disingenuous and dangerous than college dropout buffoon Walker or "successful business woman" Fiorina. What other evidence would he willfully ignore if it didn't fit the agenda?
Welcome back Gail! I was starting to get worried. But with that much material to work with im glad you took some time off to recharge. Looking forward to the next column.
12
ANOTHER "CHEAT SHEET"
JEB! If not for "W," he could have easily gotten the GOP nomination. His main criticism about Bush2 on Colbert was spending too much Really? This makes him just another inauthentic pol.
THE DONALD: He is nuts .... but, uses it to his advantage knowing how uniformed the Tea Party and that the right wing lower class are so uniformed vis-à-vis their own interests. To be concise: he is as crazy as a fox.
CARSON: I like him but would never vote for him. He doesn't realize that the Bible is mere poetry written by men millennia ago. And, his combination of religion and science makes no sense.
FIORINA: Excellent campaigner but is there a correlation between that and being a good president?
HUCKABEE: Takes his brand of evangelical religion as being literal as written ... No!
WALKER: Any worker who votes for him is voting against themselves. Works for the Koch bro's.
CHRIS: Good act as being "authentic" but, he is long gone.
CRUZ & RUBIO: As they castigate Castro and bro,' they seem to forget Batista, the CIA and the Mafia. Their adherence to religion is dangerous.
KASIICH: Problems ... but he seems to be the best of the GOP clown car, circa 2016.
[I am not ashamed of being a progressive (what's wrong with progress?). In my life I've contributed to only two candidates: Obama and Bernie.]
JEB! If not for "W," he could have easily gotten the GOP nomination. His main criticism about Bush2 on Colbert was spending too much Really? This makes him just another inauthentic pol.
THE DONALD: He is nuts .... but, uses it to his advantage knowing how uniformed the Tea Party and that the right wing lower class are so uniformed vis-à-vis their own interests. To be concise: he is as crazy as a fox.
CARSON: I like him but would never vote for him. He doesn't realize that the Bible is mere poetry written by men millennia ago. And, his combination of religion and science makes no sense.
FIORINA: Excellent campaigner but is there a correlation between that and being a good president?
HUCKABEE: Takes his brand of evangelical religion as being literal as written ... No!
WALKER: Any worker who votes for him is voting against themselves. Works for the Koch bro's.
CHRIS: Good act as being "authentic" but, he is long gone.
CRUZ & RUBIO: As they castigate Castro and bro,' they seem to forget Batista, the CIA and the Mafia. Their adherence to religion is dangerous.
KASIICH: Problems ... but he seems to be the best of the GOP clown car, circa 2016.
[I am not ashamed of being a progressive (what's wrong with progress?). In my life I've contributed to only two candidates: Obama and Bernie.]
100
Most of "The Bible" was written less than three millenia ago, but before humankind had advanced significantly in mathematics, medicine, science, etc. Yeah, I agree that it's old. But it doesn't predate significant Asian, Indian, and pre-Columbian 'American' cultures.
8
"CraigiBob." Good points. My reference to religion and the Bible (I should have used the term 'holy books' or orthodoxies of the Abrahamic faiths). It is amazing that Judaism, Christianity and Islam are at their roots so similar.
They can be referred to as "the same old song with a difference in the melody."
And, the most significant problem with the Muslim religion is that there has been no major reformation.
They can be referred to as "the same old song with a difference in the melody."
And, the most significant problem with the Muslim religion is that there has been no major reformation.
5
The best part of the surprise column is the return of your byline! Welcome home, Ms. Collins. And none of the names on your giggle-list are worth a mention. It's great to have you back!
21
Hard to argue with anything she says. Of course it was from a whimsical perspective. None the less you cannot argue with her points made about the rancid 16 or 17. As we move forward these 16 or 17 show themselves to be not worthy of the top they seek, the presidency, but it is a marvel how so many of them have achieved what they currently have. I count at least six sitting or current governors. After seeing their boys melt in the bright lights how must the voters of these states feel? "I was tricked" must be on their minds. No matter, even if we get one of these dolts the sun will rise in the East and set in the West. Given what this bunch will say I hope it will. Maybe? Guess you can ask Ben Carson.
19
This column would be hysterically funny if it were fiction.
41
And what about our Bobby Jindal, Gail? What's he been up to?
19
The republican slate of candidates we unfortunately see now on our tv screens
have hit the pinnacle of imbecility not seen in recent history. This group might
even be worse than the last crew we had to view. Mr.. Trump , to me , represents the ugly American - met his ilk before - thought they might have
evolved due to globalization. Not so. He hates just about everyone, calls them
stupid, talks about winning as if it is an honor badge regardless of decency;
is a birther, a misogynist, an ignoramus . We can only hope this group disappears in the annals of our history as misfits of an era.
have hit the pinnacle of imbecility not seen in recent history. This group might
even be worse than the last crew we had to view. Mr.. Trump , to me , represents the ugly American - met his ilk before - thought they might have
evolved due to globalization. Not so. He hates just about everyone, calls them
stupid, talks about winning as if it is an honor badge regardless of decency;
is a birther, a misogynist, an ignoramus . We can only hope this group disappears in the annals of our history as misfits of an era.
72
welcome back gail. i missed the snark.
16
Welcome back Ms. Collins.....I missed you dearly!!!!
28
Odd that Third Bush never brags about his most significant contribution to our nation, corrupting the 2000 election, which saddled the nation with his brother, another cowardly Viet Nam dodger like Trump, Carson and the disappearing Oops Perry.
Had Third Bush not corrupted that election American's wouldn't know the words quadruple amputee, enhanced interrogation (torture) extraordinary rendition (kidnapping followed by torture) or Abu Ghraib. The lives of 4,489 GI's would not have been wasted, 13,000 GI's would not be maimed for life and hundreds of thousands of GI's would have PTSD for life.
But for Third Bush corrupting the election The Charge of The Fools Brigade into Iraq would never have happened.
Had Third Bush not corrupted that election American's wouldn't know the words quadruple amputee, enhanced interrogation (torture) extraordinary rendition (kidnapping followed by torture) or Abu Ghraib. The lives of 4,489 GI's would not have been wasted, 13,000 GI's would not be maimed for life and hundreds of thousands of GI's would have PTSD for life.
But for Third Bush corrupting the election The Charge of The Fools Brigade into Iraq would never have happened.
999
The Republicans are very successful in bamboozling the public like they did with the Iraq debacle. Imagine what would have happened if 9/11 happened on Al Gore's watch. (if Jeb hadn't rigged it with Katherine Harris's help) The rage and hyperbole against him from the Republicans would have been so over the top that it would make Donald Trump look like Lincoln Chafee. They would have immediately called for impeachment and possibly execution once convicted.
9
As I said before, all of the Republican presidential contenders, the ones that now prefer war instead of a P5+1 accord with Iran, should be forced to walk the halls of Walter Reed National Military Hospital right at their door steps in Bethesda, Md. at least thrice a week. The many, often very young men and women lacking one or more limbs and having been in rehab there for years already might wake the up to the horrors of war one of 'theirs' started.
But then, they always let the children of others fight their bloody conflicts and are completely numb to the life long suffering of others.
But then, they always let the children of others fight their bloody conflicts and are completely numb to the life long suffering of others.
18
Plus Al Gore would have done something about the environment so that when Obama became president he didnt have to play catch up.
5
Whew. I was distraught thinking that you had decided to give up the opinion pages and I was doomed to go through the Presidential cycle without your insight and humor. Imagine my relief when I saw your byline and felt the world reestablish its axis. You should have plenty of fodder in the coming months to keep us readers waiting for your columns. I truly enjoy your writing. thank you.
109
Great to have Gail Collins back!
16
Gail, are you back from book leave? I hope so! I don't know how we all could get through the election season without you.
21
.
Well, the 2015 election season -- which is where we are -- will not be too tough on us.
My local Primary today is only about who should be our Party District Leader.
Well, the 2015 election season -- which is where we are -- will not be too tough on us.
My local Primary today is only about who should be our Party District Leader.
“Everybody wants to talk about hypotheticals; there is no such thing as a hypothetical.”
My question for him would be: "However, what if there was such a thing? What then?"
Honestly, this mix of bland and crazy is only to be expected with 17 candidates. The only way to stand out from the pack is to do something outrageous, but this often backfires. The only memorable event mentioned in this article that didn't bring bad press in this article is Fiorina's victory in the debate.
My question for him would be: "However, what if there was such a thing? What then?"
Honestly, this mix of bland and crazy is only to be expected with 17 candidates. The only way to stand out from the pack is to do something outrageous, but this often backfires. The only memorable event mentioned in this article that didn't bring bad press in this article is Fiorina's victory in the debate.
20
As each election cycle comes around and I see the throng of republican presidential wannabes, I'm reminded of "Fantasia" wherein Mickey Mouse (the Koch Bros.?) plays the sorcerer's apprentice and haplessly creates a phalanx of zombie brooms (the perfect analogy for straw men) to carry his water. With a deft segue to Lewis Carroll, we see Grover Norquist as the anti-Jacob Marley, rattling his chains to ensure no candidate goes soft on the penury and suffering of "those people". Many of these candidates managed to disappear like the Cheshire Cat when it come to serving in the military they want to use to impose American exceptionalism on the rest of the world. Listening to their "positions" and plans to refurbish American glory, I'm reminded of the adage about buying hay: Premium fresh hay brings a premium price, hay that's been through the horse can be had for less. Most of their "plans" have been brought up more times than a cow's cud, and have pretty much all wound up at the same destination. Unfortunately, this is NOT what nurtures the new growth of fresh ideas. It just sticks on our boots and bogs us down.
9
I give Ted Cruz a lot of credit. He's emerged as the most despicable candidate, against a lot of tough competition. It can't have been easy, but Cruz simply refuses to give up.
735
"most despicable"
Perhaps the best comment to date. After they eliminated the swim suit competition, poor Christie fell in the rankings!
Perhaps the best comment to date. After they eliminated the swim suit competition, poor Christie fell in the rankings!
20
What?! Rick Santorum is not running?!
4
I don't know--Huckabee is surely giving him a run for his money.
£
£
Welcome back! Our long national nightmare is over!
We were sorely in need of this rundown of would-be Presidents. I will be much better-informed now!
£
Welcome back! Our long national nightmare is over!
We were sorely in need of this rundown of would-be Presidents. I will be much better-informed now!
62
Dear Gail, book or no book, we knew you couldn't resist the siren call of the Republican Clown Car much longer. Enjoy yourself deflating their tires, and welcome back!
153
It gets so dreary around here without you, Gail. You're the only one that makes this circus funny.
216
Welcome back, Gail. The collection of clowns and wanna-bes seeking the Republican nod for president is just too easy a target for any political satirist, humorist, or exaspirationist. Low-hanging fruit indeed. Are there any Republican statesmen, deep thinkers, philosophers, or maybe just someone who got past adolescence? Are they all cheap-suit salesmen?
My parents were Stevenson/Kennedy Democrats. I learned from the cradle that Richard Nixon was the anti-christ. Yet Nixon had more presidential gravitas than every Republican that has followed him combined. including Saint Reagan.
The party of Lincoln has turned into the party of Inkin, Blinkin, and Nod.
My parents were Stevenson/Kennedy Democrats. I learned from the cradle that Richard Nixon was the anti-christ. Yet Nixon had more presidential gravitas than every Republican that has followed him combined. including Saint Reagan.
The party of Lincoln has turned into the party of Inkin, Blinkin, and Nod.
252
What he said!
8
They had a deep thinking candidate last go round. John Huntsman. He never got out of the gate. Deep thinking doesn't seem to be one of their requirements. Hate filled, bombastic, misogynistic, bigoted, homophobic, xenophobic, anti working man, anti intellectual, anti science and above all pseudo "Christian", then I'm your "guy"! Intelligent, deep thinking, mature, diplomatic statesman? Not so much!!
47
yep, Hillary is just so much smarter
Yes she is. She shows the love for the people by appearing in parades surrounded by a moving rope line to keep her supporters at bay.
But the Repubs are just well sooooooooo stupid right?
Keep up the big words coming from your small, snug mind.
Yes she is. She shows the love for the people by appearing in parades surrounded by a moving rope line to keep her supporters at bay.
But the Repubs are just well sooooooooo stupid right?
Keep up the big words coming from your small, snug mind.
Wonderful succinct piece, Gail. I have missed seeing your columns on a regular basis. I wish you would appear more often.
43
What a great surprise to see your byline in the paper today. Wonderful column. Welcome back!
143
I think I speak for us all when I say, Welcome back!
169
And seconded.
20
Thank you Gail for more of the same. Why not recap what the Dems have been up to, and that includes Sanders and O’Malley? At least MSNBC interviewed Martin O’Malley tonight on Chris Hayes, so the poor guy gets some exposure to the voters!
Too bad the Dems delayed their few debate to start in mid Oct, after about 3 Gop debates have already gotten enormous media spotlight since early August. That itself is a good topic for analysis by a political expert.
If the debates could alternate parties we could get more of a real debate in this country. This is a democracy? Where is the ‘competition’ of issues? Issues?
Too bad the Dems delayed their few debate to start in mid Oct, after about 3 Gop debates have already gotten enormous media spotlight since early August. That itself is a good topic for analysis by a political expert.
If the debates could alternate parties we could get more of a real debate in this country. This is a democracy? Where is the ‘competition’ of issues? Issues?
22
If you actually READ the second paragraph of her column, you would see that she wrote: "Today, the Republicans,"
This, to me, implies that the next column will say, "Today, the Democrats."
Tune in and see....
This, to me, implies that the next column will say, "Today, the Democrats."
Tune in and see....
6
Really? We are STILL talking about the Republicans?
25
We're making fun of the Republicans because really, that's all we can do.
17
It’s hard to say that the Republican campaigns are getting serious. There’s nothing serious about any of them, except in the sense of ominous, or dangerous or medically worrisome. And it says something that Jeb!’s comment about W. was, unintentionally, the funniest thing on The Late Show (if by Late we mean moribund).
It was a surprise to find that Jeb was really John. Next we’ll learn that his middle name isn’t !. It might as well be \ the way he threw W under the bus for Medicare drug coverage. He’d better look after his own health, though. If he wants to be > his brother he’ll have to – to the finish line, and keep his : healthy by eating plenty of ^ ^ ^.
Republicans don’t send a good message about health. Ben Carson hasn’t evolved a beyond an 18th Century understanding of biology. Kasich said he wanted to “break the backs of teachers unions” in Ohio. Ouch. And Carly Fiorina nearly killed Hewlett-Packard.
Maybe that’s why so many Republican candidates are against drug coverage, medical care and making a living. They’re clearly not concerned about this life, but they’re gung-ho about the next one--you know, the one we get after we’re dead. For people who stake out the Unknown as their territory they sure seem to know an awful lot about it.
Just don’t put Christie in charge of traffic on the River Styx. We may never get to the great beyond.
It was a surprise to find that Jeb was really John. Next we’ll learn that his middle name isn’t !. It might as well be \ the way he threw W under the bus for Medicare drug coverage. He’d better look after his own health, though. If he wants to be > his brother he’ll have to – to the finish line, and keep his : healthy by eating plenty of ^ ^ ^.
Republicans don’t send a good message about health. Ben Carson hasn’t evolved a beyond an 18th Century understanding of biology. Kasich said he wanted to “break the backs of teachers unions” in Ohio. Ouch. And Carly Fiorina nearly killed Hewlett-Packard.
Maybe that’s why so many Republican candidates are against drug coverage, medical care and making a living. They’re clearly not concerned about this life, but they’re gung-ho about the next one--you know, the one we get after we’re dead. For people who stake out the Unknown as their territory they sure seem to know an awful lot about it.
Just don’t put Christie in charge of traffic on the River Styx. We may never get to the great beyond.
607
Their "clearly NOT concerned about this life.
Unless you are an unborn fetus or being kept alive on life support, THEN they care about you.
Unless you are an unborn fetus or being kept alive on life support, THEN they care about you.
18
serious = medicallly worrisome.
Gemli, YOU write a column.
Please.
Gemli, YOU write a column.
Please.
19
Gemli-"Just don’t put Christie in charge of traffic on the River Styx. We may never get to the great beyond."
One of your best!!
One of your best!!
24
A motley crew we clearly see
Comprise Repub candidacy,
Oh Jebenezer's looking wan
It seems that he's aka John,
He's being mocked by Trump, a jewel,
Who served in Military School,
Ben Carson, surgeon in a surge,
Charles Darwin's ideas longs to purge,
And Carly once a corporate mess
Blithely runs on her "success"
Mike Huckabee, and Ted Cruz, too,
Who run with nothing else to do,
Scott Walker, whose ideas appall
Would build 'neath Canada, a Wall,
And Chris, emblem of purity
Who'd kill Social Security
A brilliant crew and yet how strange
Not one admits to climate change!
Comprise Repub candidacy,
Oh Jebenezer's looking wan
It seems that he's aka John,
He's being mocked by Trump, a jewel,
Who served in Military School,
Ben Carson, surgeon in a surge,
Charles Darwin's ideas longs to purge,
And Carly once a corporate mess
Blithely runs on her "success"
Mike Huckabee, and Ted Cruz, too,
Who run with nothing else to do,
Scott Walker, whose ideas appall
Would build 'neath Canada, a Wall,
And Chris, emblem of purity
Who'd kill Social Security
A brilliant crew and yet how strange
Not one admits to climate change!
619
Thank you, Larry Eisenberg, as always for the smile. Not easy to describe this pitiful smack of jellyfish, but you did it with flair. Since I am into the editing this morning on various 'country profiles', I might have suggested that you include the word 'dangerous' because all this political Grotesque we are facing may end up costing our Country and its people a lot.
24
Well said, Sir. And odd that none of them admit to climate change. The political climate has certainly changed. There was a time when normal Republicans like Dwight Eisenhower and Nelson Rockefeller flourished in the presidential candidate habitat. But now, that scene is so heated up that the only strong surviving GOP species seem to be outliers like Mike Huckabee, Ben Carson and Donald Trump.
11
As a boast this was not very wise,
And could yet be the Trumpster's demise,
For many don't find it cool,
To be in "military" school,
Re-enacting THE LORD OF THE FLIES.
And could yet be the Trumpster's demise,
For many don't find it cool,
To be in "military" school,
Re-enacting THE LORD OF THE FLIES.
13
The rest are stumbling all over themselves trying to out-Trump Donald Trump. What a circus!
So we are left with the most absurd group of candidates from the right in living memory. It is the Democrats' race to lose.