So much all or nothing thinking in this article. What I would tell graduates is that life is a balance. In this case, a balance of what you are passionate about and what you need to do to get on with life. Life without passion is nearly worth living. Life without taking care of the basics is chaos and dysfunction. Life with both is the sweet spot of happiness.
15
Well said, but a red flag always goes up for me when I read articles like this -- that much of it could be a recipe for narcissism.
2
Just wondering when was the last time Roger mowed the lawn?
12
There are old mowers of lawns and bold mowers of lawns, but no old bold mowers of lawns.
7
expending effort in a way that enriches lives of others, generally (shake the salt) makes life a more happy place, but not necessarily a financially richer reward. education, the large topic of this time of year, often yields results only when it has an application to be used for, aka a job or perhaps a grand social gesture that actually enriches others, rather than suck the richness from others. a child is an investment, at least for those who care to invest time, attention, resources and (again) sharing of vital experiential knowledge upon. the children are the garden, they grow, just as the old folks, some thrive, some don't. we are all temporary, unable to change that fact, yet we try to extend that brief dance with life through the very natural capacity that has allowed us all to live, some long some less.
5
Not that I'm a fan but its funny that when Cohen basically has the exact same advice as David Brooks he is lauded in the comment section while Brooks is lambasted.
6
How about not using a lawn as a metaphor? Those of us in CA are anti-lawn now for the obvious reasons.
16
Yep, this rings true to my heart. When the going get's tough the tough get going. Take the garbage out, tidy up your habitat, weed your garden, No complaining just do it. I swear it works & if I can bestow any gifts to my children it's " get err done and then go play. " As Roger Cohen shares " In the everyday task at hand, for woman and man, happiness lurks." Yep!
18
Emerson (Ralph Waldo, not Keith) noted that “Life is a journey, not a destination.” But journeys still suggest someplace else, and usually another time. As I get older, now seems a bit more important.
8
Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.
35
One cannot dump all of humanity into one pot. Some can find happiness in the mundane. Others need a raison d'être to really shine. For the latter, Mr Cohen's commencement speech is perfect. Fo the former, this piece is a great exhortattion. Whatever group one belongs to, the lesson is to keep at it - laboring to find your calling so as to find happiness or being happy as you labor away at the ordinary.
12
Hmm. . .Standing the Myth of Sisyphus on its head reminds me of Markham's The Man with the Hoe:
Bowed by the weight of centuries he leans
Upon his hoe and gazes at the ground. The emptiness of ages in his face, And on his back the burden of the world Who made him dead to rapture and despair,
A thing that grieves not and that never hopes.
Stolid and stunned, a brother to the ox?
Who loosened and let down this brutal jaw?
Whose was the hand that slanted back this brow?
Whose breath blew out the light within this brain?
Is this the Thing the Lord God made and gave
To have dominion over sea and land;
To trace the stars and search the heavens for power;
To feel the passion of Eternity?
Is this the Dream He dreamed who shaped the suns
And marked their ways upon the ancient deep?
Down all the stretch of Hell to its last gulf
There is no shape more terrible than this —
More tongued with censure of the world's blind greed —
More filled with signs and portents for the soul —
More fraught with menace to the universe.
Mow the lawn instead of pursuing your dreams. . .People who are falling out of the middle class don't even have a decent place to live--let alone a lawn to mow!
Bowed by the weight of centuries he leans
Upon his hoe and gazes at the ground. The emptiness of ages in his face, And on his back the burden of the world Who made him dead to rapture and despair,
A thing that grieves not and that never hopes.
Stolid and stunned, a brother to the ox?
Who loosened and let down this brutal jaw?
Whose was the hand that slanted back this brow?
Whose breath blew out the light within this brain?
Is this the Thing the Lord God made and gave
To have dominion over sea and land;
To trace the stars and search the heavens for power;
To feel the passion of Eternity?
Is this the Dream He dreamed who shaped the suns
And marked their ways upon the ancient deep?
Down all the stretch of Hell to its last gulf
There is no shape more terrible than this —
More tongued with censure of the world's blind greed —
More filled with signs and portents for the soul —
More fraught with menace to the universe.
Mow the lawn instead of pursuing your dreams. . .People who are falling out of the middle class don't even have a decent place to live--let alone a lawn to mow!
2
"The thing is to perform the task well and find reward even in the mundane."
----------------------------------------
This an amoral capitalist creed.
It is best to pursue happiness by performing tasks that are good - doing them well is secondary.
----------------------------------------
This an amoral capitalist creed.
It is best to pursue happiness by performing tasks that are good - doing them well is secondary.
After reading this reuse of a commencement speech, I decided to go back to gazing at my navel.
3
Happiness can indeed be found in hard work, no matter how menial, especially if it is work one chooses. It is much more difficult if the work is assigned, meaningless, or overseen by the incompetent. When I owned my own business I took joy in sweeping out the shop, repairing fixtures, going for supplies. Prior to that, I worked for a man who took joy in making the lives of his employees miserable.
5
Life is about meaning. Our inner worlds are what makes each of us unique. Each of us 'imagines' our lives every hour of every day. Each of us 'hopes'. Meaning, imagination and hope keep each of us getting out of bed in the morning. They are what makes us human.
3
I failed to see what this article has to do with the collapsing Sykes-Picot order.
Lawn mowing in California is done by illegal immigrants. $10 bucks a week, under the table. With their 2-3-4 kids in school, kids that wouldn't be here if they weren't, its a serious fiscal loser.
I for one at tender age of 20 spend some 21 days at the Outward Bound School on the slopes of Mt. Kilimanjaro among some 100 strangers : Africans, Asians, Europeans, Arabs, Germans, Italians, British etc. Average age 21, different cultures with English being common. 5 groups of twenty each, with the objective of acclimatization and every one being responsible for each other and every member of their group, living together, in small dormitories with two tier bunk beds. The course consists competitive rope walking, wall / rock climbing, abseiling. 10 miles cross country run, Three nights solo at with 65 Lbs back pack, three matches an un-boiled egg. The final 4 days of the course involved the whole school under the supervision of 10 instructors taking five different routs up the 20.000 feet snow covered mountain to top of the KIbo's Crater rim and reaching the Kaise Spitze Peak as the sun arise from the East. The funny part of the experience is that the German Warden's wife, the nurse referred to the climb a walk and in some sense it is indeed a walk up that majestic mountain. Which at times when the fog lifts appears to be in the back yard , where one can reach out and touch it.. However in reality it is some five plus miles away from the School that is at 8,000 feet altitude. Nevertheless on a clear day at twilight one glimpse the over hanging pinkish top from some 500 miles away. My sisters in law use to joke my gazing at it as it was some beloved. cont...
1
Conti...
The whole 21 days is a life time experience of character building and ones own respect for him/ her self . Caring and being responsible for one self and each and every member of the group, that one one cannot not leave behind nor look down upon with any kind of prejudice, bias or indifference. I my group we had a Arab fellow a prince of the Saudi Royal Family , who had an very expensive Rolex Camera, that he found midway up the second acclimatization trip too heavy to carry in his rucksack and threw it away. Of course the climbs and acclimatization trips are toil and sweat with the menace of horse files that bite. For the solo three nights one gets three matches and one un boiled egg to carry around for the third days breakfast,when the instructors comes around to check up. The innovation is how to carry the egg and only three matches. Best place to carry the egg was in the middle tube of the paper toilet roll. First thing after using the pancho to make little tent is go looks for wood etc with some kindling to light small fires and keep or embers and use one match and save the other two.
On the final assent up the mountain using five different routs the whole 100 plus contingent meets up at Kibo Hut . Where there are bunk beds to rest and try to sleep a few hours. At 2 AM. on a moon lite night 100 strong in five separate groups 10 minutes apart start up zig zag climb through the scree.
The whole 21 days is a life time experience of character building and ones own respect for him/ her self . Caring and being responsible for one self and each and every member of the group, that one one cannot not leave behind nor look down upon with any kind of prejudice, bias or indifference. I my group we had a Arab fellow a prince of the Saudi Royal Family , who had an very expensive Rolex Camera, that he found midway up the second acclimatization trip too heavy to carry in his rucksack and threw it away. Of course the climbs and acclimatization trips are toil and sweat with the menace of horse files that bite. For the solo three nights one gets three matches and one un boiled egg to carry around for the third days breakfast,when the instructors comes around to check up. The innovation is how to carry the egg and only three matches. Best place to carry the egg was in the middle tube of the paper toilet roll. First thing after using the pancho to make little tent is go looks for wood etc with some kindling to light small fires and keep or embers and use one match and save the other two.
On the final assent up the mountain using five different routs the whole 100 plus contingent meets up at Kibo Hut . Where there are bunk beds to rest and try to sleep a few hours. At 2 AM. on a moon lite night 100 strong in five separate groups 10 minutes apart start up zig zag climb through the scree.
2
conti...
During the Zig Zag climb up if not careful one can slip down three steps rather then climbing one. Then as the sun peaks at about 7 am. One reaches the rim and then circles up to the Kaiser Spitz Peak ( Uhuru Peak) For my own personal experience and partial task completed, there is nothing like it. One does not think about conquering the mountain. Because the majestic mass is unconquerable. The real accomplishment is let it allow one to visit the top an appreciate the feeling and also see the Peak of Mount Kenya some 500 miles.
After the climb up now comes the time to start back down. Where in an hour or less one can reach down to Kibo Hut and check in with the team leader and make sure every member of the group is accounted for. Then with two hours before sun-set the walk down through the central route one reached back the school compound and gets ready for the final feast and the next day back on the lorry ride back to Nairobi. I fortunately live in Nairobi and got back home after some 7 hours ride.
The best memory that I brought back was some bunches of ever lasting flowers that grow in abundance of the slopes for my sisters and sister in law. Now some fifty plus years, I still have some of flowers and some some actual framed butter fly wings in art form depicting African Women carrying their babies on their back.
Above every thing else in life how can I not feel that happiness and the thrill of it all.
During the Zig Zag climb up if not careful one can slip down three steps rather then climbing one. Then as the sun peaks at about 7 am. One reaches the rim and then circles up to the Kaiser Spitz Peak ( Uhuru Peak) For my own personal experience and partial task completed, there is nothing like it. One does not think about conquering the mountain. Because the majestic mass is unconquerable. The real accomplishment is let it allow one to visit the top an appreciate the feeling and also see the Peak of Mount Kenya some 500 miles.
After the climb up now comes the time to start back down. Where in an hour or less one can reach down to Kibo Hut and check in with the team leader and make sure every member of the group is accounted for. Then with two hours before sun-set the walk down through the central route one reached back the school compound and gets ready for the final feast and the next day back on the lorry ride back to Nairobi. I fortunately live in Nairobi and got back home after some 7 hours ride.
The best memory that I brought back was some bunches of ever lasting flowers that grow in abundance of the slopes for my sisters and sister in law. Now some fifty plus years, I still have some of flowers and some some actual framed butter fly wings in art form depicting African Women carrying their babies on their back.
Above every thing else in life how can I not feel that happiness and the thrill of it all.
2
To paraphrase Tom Waits "Got to get behind the Mule
in the morning and plow . . ."
in the morning and plow . . ."
4
Chop wood. Carry water.
8
Realistic work advice to a young person about to enter the workforce?
Actually the advice I have to give should be stated much sooner. There is no question study, repetitive task in general, should be something a person should get used to sooner rather than later. Perhaps the value of such is seen most easily in music: Before one can improvise, move freely, one must understand the essentials and this takes years of practice. Improvisation, freedom, inspiration, is based on much which can be described as repetitive task.
That said, society has a very serious problem: There is no question many people in society lack great intelligence or talent so these people especially should get used to the repetitious, even monotonous, jobs. Intelligence and talent are rare. But it is also very true that we all are human beings so all people should have a mixture of repetition and true freedom of mind and body in workplace environment. But our society operates in very different fashion: Many people even though with talent and intelligence are condemned to work repetitive and dull jobs (all we mean by underemployment) while others, the few, get plum positions.
It would make better sense if society had people on rotation schedules, especially if they have intelligence, talent. For example, one day I might work in retail, another day as an electrician, and two or three days--"main" job--as a writer. For most people pure repetition in workplace is torture, no wonder "drinks, vacation".
Actually the advice I have to give should be stated much sooner. There is no question study, repetitive task in general, should be something a person should get used to sooner rather than later. Perhaps the value of such is seen most easily in music: Before one can improvise, move freely, one must understand the essentials and this takes years of practice. Improvisation, freedom, inspiration, is based on much which can be described as repetitive task.
That said, society has a very serious problem: There is no question many people in society lack great intelligence or talent so these people especially should get used to the repetitious, even monotonous, jobs. Intelligence and talent are rare. But it is also very true that we all are human beings so all people should have a mixture of repetition and true freedom of mind and body in workplace environment. But our society operates in very different fashion: Many people even though with talent and intelligence are condemned to work repetitive and dull jobs (all we mean by underemployment) while others, the few, get plum positions.
It would make better sense if society had people on rotation schedules, especially if they have intelligence, talent. For example, one day I might work in retail, another day as an electrician, and two or three days--"main" job--as a writer. For most people pure repetition in workplace is torture, no wonder "drinks, vacation".
1
Happiness comes with happenings....but contentment comes from within. They are not the same. Contentment is that inner peace that allows you to do what needs to be done and not be caught up in the external pursuits of life (ie. The pursuit of money, for example). When one pursue happiness, you're letting external factors control your inner feelings and the 'happenings' around you influences how you feel within.
Happiness is a part of joy, but joy does not necessarily have to involve happiness.
Happiness is a part of joy, but joy does not necessarily have to involve happiness.
4
A very wise man, my father, offered this advice to me around my 12th birthday, "Make all the small decisions carefully and the big ones will take care of themselves." Thanks Dad.
12
I've been saying this for many years. Having attended too many graduations over the years, I am well aware of the silly commencement speeches which urge the new graduates to pursue their dreams. This false hope helps about one person in a million; for the majority of poor souls who follow that lousy advice, a life of disappointment awaits.
To be clear: life (especially in this unequal modern world) is very tough. Suck it up, and work hard. When you just want to quit, don't. Hang in there. Try to find a job that you are good at, which usually means you will not enjoy it. Work is not a fun activity for most of us.
If you are lucky enough to be born rich, this advice does not apply to you.
Side note: I gave a speech at my high school graduation in 1968. Different times. I spoke out against the war in Vietnam, when doing so was very unpopular with the majority of school administrators, teachers and fellow students.
To be clear: life (especially in this unequal modern world) is very tough. Suck it up, and work hard. When you just want to quit, don't. Hang in there. Try to find a job that you are good at, which usually means you will not enjoy it. Work is not a fun activity for most of us.
If you are lucky enough to be born rich, this advice does not apply to you.
Side note: I gave a speech at my high school graduation in 1968. Different times. I spoke out against the war in Vietnam, when doing so was very unpopular with the majority of school administrators, teachers and fellow students.
8
Our corporate overlords would undoubtably be pleased with this advice.
13
Wild-eyed immature inspirations and aspirations of youth are too easily clobbered by the blunt instrument of daily life, we don’t need graduation speeches extolling our young dreamers to acquiesce. Yes, of course, there is reward in doing a mundane task well, but let that mundane task be what should become of youthful aspiration: the everyday practice in preparing for a concert, the daily headache of getting a bill through congress, the mundane march of patients through a doctor’s office, the one step at a time, one foot before the other, climb up the Himalayas, the daily frustration before a canvas in the studio, or a million other inspired pursuits that ultimately necessitate doing mundane tasks well. Without youthful inspiration, and it’s fostering by wise adults, there would be no great achievements.
7
My husband of forty-five years always laughs at me because I always have a plan and he always plays life by ear. Having a path each day makes me comfortable but when I advise young high school graduates I don't tell them to emulate me. I simply tell them to be interesting people. Thomas Merton advised people to think of repetitive tasks as opportunities for reflection--attitude affects understanding.
15
Good column. Reminds me of the MLK speech, "All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence".
8
I only disagree with the sentiment of getting it done. Do it, yes, get it done, we'll have to discuss what that means.
2
Being sort of a dinosaur myself, I agree with Mr. Cohen, but what he does not take into consideration is the way we grew up in contrast to how kids these days grow up.
We had the time to do these sometimes boring tasks as we had no other distraction.
When I look at my kids, all they seem to do is to connect via all kinds of gadgets.
I can't imagine my kids mowing the lawn in full concentration while at the same time telling all their 86483746 million online friends what they are currently up to.
So yes, ZEN like doing a task perfectly and totally concentrated is a good way of getting something done, but these days that has become the way of us dinosaurs :-)
We had the time to do these sometimes boring tasks as we had no other distraction.
When I look at my kids, all they seem to do is to connect via all kinds of gadgets.
I can't imagine my kids mowing the lawn in full concentration while at the same time telling all their 86483746 million online friends what they are currently up to.
So yes, ZEN like doing a task perfectly and totally concentrated is a good way of getting something done, but these days that has become the way of us dinosaurs :-)
23
Yes the little things, the daily minutia can bring a sense of peace, that all is neat in my little world. A perfectly organized closet, or chest of drawers that is opened and appreciated every morning; stepping out into a well-mowed (and edged!) front yard every day, just sets me on the right path into a what will always be a busy workday. I love mowing the lawn; raking up 16 full bags of leaves in the fall gives me a great sense of accomplishment. The dog enjoys my company and conversation too!
12
Thank you, Mr. Cohen!
2
Voltaire gave the same advice 250 years ago. Cultivate your garden.
7
Yes: So listen to the voice from your soul, quiet but insistent, and honor it.
“It’s very important,” said Buffett, “always to live your life by an inner scorecard, not an outer scorecard."
“It’s very important,” said Buffett, “always to live your life by an inner scorecard, not an outer scorecard."
4
Perhaps Mr. Cohen, in the numerous and very erudite citations about happiness, forgot Colonel Saito's (played by Sessue Hayakawa) words to the prisoners of war in "The bridge on the River Kwai": "be happy in your work".
The same words might have been applied to Sysiphus or anyone whose work and life are drudgery. I wish Mr. Cohen's youngest daughter not to have a cultural shock upon moving from London to California.
The same words might have been applied to Sysiphus or anyone whose work and life are drudgery. I wish Mr. Cohen's youngest daughter not to have a cultural shock upon moving from London to California.
3
"Most of us have jobs that are too small for our spirits.....Most of us, like the assembly line worker, have jobs that are too small for our spirit. Jobs are not big enough for people." -- Studs Terkel, Working.
____ the lawn.
____ the lawn.
5
A fantastic, profoundly wise piece. Thank you.
8
And if you seek true lawn-mowerhood, you must remember that one o'clock is time for lunch.
Bum de dum de dum.
Bum de dum de dum.
Have thrown down the gauntlet of truth.........
Rilke's usually good value.
My cat is dying.
For fifteen years he's filled our lives with grace and laughter. He's got a huge spirit, a lion's spirit, in his elegant little body.
And, he's my best friend. He's sitting here now, up on the plastic bookshelf next to the computer. He's too heavy for the little shelf and it's cracked from his vigorous pounces. He likes it because the female cat sits there, she of the exquisite perfume and terrible claws. He's spent his life trying to catch her. He's caught her a couple of times, to his sorrow. He's got a razor-like scar right across his nose and the memory of torn ears. And now, with his heart failing, he can only dream of chasing her up and down the hall.
So, he sits where she's been, huge eyes glowing.
When we got him, he could sit in my hand. Together, we painted, danced, made costumes, taught, studied, performed, memorized choreography, watched our students blossom and excel. It was all about inspiration!
Then, one night, he was curled in my arms and his breathing grew ragged. In a breath it all vanished, all the years of struggle and creativity - over, as fragile and perishable as the little creature in my arms.
Each day since we've waged a war we cannot win. We sit together all night and watch the sky grow light.
We never could win, but in a fever of zills and color, in flaring skirts and arcing wrists and pounding feet, in the slow patient application of transparent color, I thought we'd won.
For fifteen years he's filled our lives with grace and laughter. He's got a huge spirit, a lion's spirit, in his elegant little body.
And, he's my best friend. He's sitting here now, up on the plastic bookshelf next to the computer. He's too heavy for the little shelf and it's cracked from his vigorous pounces. He likes it because the female cat sits there, she of the exquisite perfume and terrible claws. He's spent his life trying to catch her. He's caught her a couple of times, to his sorrow. He's got a razor-like scar right across his nose and the memory of torn ears. And now, with his heart failing, he can only dream of chasing her up and down the hall.
So, he sits where she's been, huge eyes glowing.
When we got him, he could sit in my hand. Together, we painted, danced, made costumes, taught, studied, performed, memorized choreography, watched our students blossom and excel. It was all about inspiration!
Then, one night, he was curled in my arms and his breathing grew ragged. In a breath it all vanished, all the years of struggle and creativity - over, as fragile and perishable as the little creature in my arms.
Each day since we've waged a war we cannot win. We sit together all night and watch the sky grow light.
We never could win, but in a fever of zills and color, in flaring skirts and arcing wrists and pounding feet, in the slow patient application of transparent color, I thought we'd won.
14
Well someone once told me the only thing money buys is a better set of problems. Now that your children are through college, the next thing will be grandchildren. And as the song goes, you will realize there is no one home to raise them.
And, if your daughter is like my own, her career will take off and she will be handed more and more responsibilities, taking trips here and there, leaving the kids and the house to whoever can manage it in their schedule. Then there are the concession stands that need managed and the ball games. You will be dead trying to keep up with the help. And, then if matters aren't worse, they will find swollen lymph nodes on your daughter ---- I'm sure the result of a full time job, a family, and a home. Roger, I am completely fed up with the life that has been sold to us all.
And, if your daughter is like my own, her career will take off and she will be handed more and more responsibilities, taking trips here and there, leaving the kids and the house to whoever can manage it in their schedule. Then there are the concession stands that need managed and the ball games. You will be dead trying to keep up with the help. And, then if matters aren't worse, they will find swollen lymph nodes on your daughter ---- I'm sure the result of a full time job, a family, and a home. Roger, I am completely fed up with the life that has been sold to us all.
3
It feels as if my parents are the last of the generation that worked hard, because that is what you were supposed to do. There was no wondering if you were following your passion. If you had a job you worked hard. That was the measure of a man or woman, how hard they worked.
Sometimes I miss the simplicity. It wasn't a perfect system by any stretch of the imagination. But oh the pressure we place on ourselves to find a job we love so it doesn't feel like we have to work a day in our life.
Sometimes I miss the simplicity. It wasn't a perfect system by any stretch of the imagination. But oh the pressure we place on ourselves to find a job we love so it doesn't feel like we have to work a day in our life.
6
Am old and dying, literally, and have lived through being married to, at one time, the Secretary of the Interior of this country.
I can tell you firsthand, they never slept, they went without meals, to Learn the TRUTH......
I can tell you firsthand, they never slept, they went without meals, to Learn the TRUTH......
4
This article brings to mind ideas expressed in the following song lyrics and book.
- From song - "Sometimes When I Get to Thinkin"
Recorded by Buffy Sainte-Marie (On album - "Little Wheel Spin And Spin")
"Think of the years before we were a pair
Years lived apart we spent learning to farm
Sowing, growing, and learning to care for ourselves
And preparing for each other's arms"
- From book - "The Creative Habit: Learn It And Use It For Life"
By dancer and choreographer, Twyla Tharp
- "... I've learned that being creative is a full-time job with its own daily patterns."
- "Creativity is not just for artists."
- "The routine is as much a part of the creative process as the lightning bolt of inspiration, maybe more."
- "There's a paradox in the notion that creativity should be a habit ... That paradox intrigues me because it occupies the place where creativity and skill rub up against each other."
- "I combat my fears with a staring-down match ..."
- "Movement stimulates our brains in ways we don't appreciate."
- "Everything feeds into my creativity. But without proper preparation, I cannot see it, retain it, and use it."
- From song - "Sometimes When I Get to Thinkin"
Recorded by Buffy Sainte-Marie (On album - "Little Wheel Spin And Spin")
"Think of the years before we were a pair
Years lived apart we spent learning to farm
Sowing, growing, and learning to care for ourselves
And preparing for each other's arms"
- From book - "The Creative Habit: Learn It And Use It For Life"
By dancer and choreographer, Twyla Tharp
- "... I've learned that being creative is a full-time job with its own daily patterns."
- "Creativity is not just for artists."
- "The routine is as much a part of the creative process as the lightning bolt of inspiration, maybe more."
- "There's a paradox in the notion that creativity should be a habit ... That paradox intrigues me because it occupies the place where creativity and skill rub up against each other."
- "I combat my fears with a staring-down match ..."
- "Movement stimulates our brains in ways we don't appreciate."
- "Everything feeds into my creativity. But without proper preparation, I cannot see it, retain it, and use it."
4
This made me think of the Rudyard Kipling poem "The Sons of Martha," about how non-glorious jobs are what make the world work, and how the people who benefit from those things don't properly appreciate the labor involved.
For those less up on their biblical allusions than the average Victorian, see Luke 10:38-42.
For those less up on their biblical allusions than the average Victorian, see Luke 10:38-42.
1
Chop wood; carry water.
Unless there is deforestation and drought.
Unless there is deforestation and drought.
7
Zen and the art of lawn mowing, Roger tell us something new from you pampered perch.
6
Doing ones dharma is taking and accepting the ordinary tasks of every day,harnessing ones inner flame and being obedient to their life's work. But for us in this new age of illusory communication, limited global resources, and living in cultural melting pots (rather than mosaics bound by a firm grout), identifying what ones dharma actually is -is daunting. So for those of us who may be a little confused, weren't born into the scion's family, taking some time for introspection and reflection, might not be a bad thing. Not necessarily always in search of inspiriation, but be sensitive to what inspires, to learn about your innermost heart's desires. It's what lasts.
6
Mr Cohen connects with his inner Calvinist!
1
Regarding the myriad doers of everyday good....I met one recently at the Houston International airport at 1am after serious weather related flight delays for many. In addition to directing people to the ideal spot to queue for a taxi, suggestions of which car rental companies were still open with car availability, hoisting baggage on and off his bus, he then chatted and amused my 4 year old daughter en route to the Car Rental Center. Just doing his job, he would say. Going above and beyond, I would say.
16
If you are good, the world is good. It takes one to know one. I'll bet you would have done the same thing.
2
I love the celebration of the mundane and the routine, and the feeling of exhaustion honestly earned. So nice to hear someone else is tired of all the commencement exhortations to find bliss, inspiration, and your unique and wonderful YOU. Find your inner "soldier ant"....
16
In this wonderful essay, Roger Cohen says to "perform the task well." But American culture militates against doing our tasks well.
When I worked in high tech as a software technical writer, speed rather than quality was valued. In fact, to work somewhat more slowly and produce a superior product was perceived as NOT doing a good job. Since I prefer to produce a high-quality product, I felt endlessly frustrated in my job.
I know the emphasis on speed rather than quality applies to the American workplace across the board. I think this is one of the reasons our country is going downhill. There are still countries that reward production of high-quality products and services: eventually these countries will leave the U.S. in the dust.
So how are Americans supposed to be happy (according to Roger Cohen’s definition) if they in effect discouraged from doing good work?
When I worked in high tech as a software technical writer, speed rather than quality was valued. In fact, to work somewhat more slowly and produce a superior product was perceived as NOT doing a good job. Since I prefer to produce a high-quality product, I felt endlessly frustrated in my job.
I know the emphasis on speed rather than quality applies to the American workplace across the board. I think this is one of the reasons our country is going downhill. There are still countries that reward production of high-quality products and services: eventually these countries will leave the U.S. in the dust.
So how are Americans supposed to be happy (according to Roger Cohen’s definition) if they in effect discouraged from doing good work?
34
Good question, Pam - "How are Americans supposed to be happy if in effect...they are discouraged from doing good work?". Prior to the industrial revolution, the Guilds' primary focus was to ensure uniformly high quality in manufactured goods and apprenticeships provided the framework to pass on time-honored standards of quality from generation to generation. The demise of the Guilds at the hands of dehumanizing mass production techniques of the industrial age along with the shift in emphasis from quality products to return on investment to absentee stockholders, in my opinion caused this status quo. I think the long term answer is for us as Americans to value the independent artisan performing high quality work by being willing to pay a higher price for the products of his or her labor, as opposed to buying cheaper alternatives mass produced in off-shore factories, with no labor or environmental laws.
3
Lovely essay, and it rings true to what I'd like to say to my children. Actually just one of them, the other two already get it. Just do the job. Pay your way first and follow your dream when the dishes are done. People don't care how creative your excuses are, they want the job done.
Mow the lawn, for crying out loud.
Thanks.
Mow the lawn, for crying out loud.
Thanks.
31
Good column. It's easy to get caught up in waiting for the marvelous to happen, while ignoring the fact that your time on earth is ticking away slowly, breath by breath. Your life is right this moment, so you'd do well to learn how to find joy in the small things. And pride. I believe there is dignity in any work performed well.
31
Nice column, Mr. Cohen. I was reminded immediately of Admiral McRaven's commencement speech at the Univ. of Texas where he reminded students the best they could do was to start the day by making their bed and, thus, starting by accomplishing something.
When you cited Camus' book about the man asked what decency is, I had to laugh because the first thing that came to my mind was how much the answer sounds just like the Supreme Court's on the subject of pornography, to wit, "I don't know how to define it, but I know it when I see it" (or words to that effect). It's all about perspective then, isn't it?
Great success to your daughter from this native Californian. Tell her if she decides to stay to remember that most of us really are quite decent.
When you cited Camus' book about the man asked what decency is, I had to laugh because the first thing that came to my mind was how much the answer sounds just like the Supreme Court's on the subject of pornography, to wit, "I don't know how to define it, but I know it when I see it" (or words to that effect). It's all about perspective then, isn't it?
Great success to your daughter from this native Californian. Tell her if she decides to stay to remember that most of us really are quite decent.
13
I think there is confusion about what the founding fathers meant by life, liberty, and the 'pursuit of happiness' The emphasis should be on the PURSUIT of happiness, not on happiness as a right or a goal.
16
If "doing the task at hand" is to be a value then "the task" needs to have "value". Too many tasks are based on false performance measures that ignore the fact that their accomplishment fosters bad outcomes. Short-term vision equals long-term tragedy. Look what's been accomplished since 1850 in the fewer than 200 years since humanity achieved a planet-affecting position: biosphere degeneration, cities where you can't breathe....
4
For me, it is doing the task, and doing it "for God," in the sense of not doing it for its accomplishment or for my own achievement -- the task can be anything, and everything done "for God" becomes equal in a certain way, whether the task happens to be mowing the lawn or academic research or caretaking or driving or anything else.
2
This was a good column.
If anyone wants to read the most amazing commencement address of all time it was given by David Foster Wallace at Kenyon College several years ago.
It's titled "This is Water".
Google it and prepare to be astonished by something radically different.
If anyone wants to read the most amazing commencement address of all time it was given by David Foster Wallace at Kenyon College several years ago.
It's titled "This is Water".
Google it and prepare to be astonished by something radically different.
5
Agree....the DFW speech This is Water is amazing.
Well, that was one of the most rambling, incoherent columns I've ever read in the Times. Now that I've experienced pretentious stream-of-conciousness on the Op-Ed page, I can't say that I like it.
4
@ Larry from San Francisco - Too many "Larrys" one who dislikes, two who like. Time for you to add a last name.
Yes, duty, that all but forgotten, derided idea. If we all just did our duty, we'd be a lot happier and the world would operate a whole lot better.
All this feel-good and "find your passion" philosophy is hogwash. Do what needs to be done and do it as well as possible. "Don't sweat the details"? Really? It's the details that will trip us up every single time - it's ALL in the details!
Having just spent a week trying to get a prescription refilled, including my doctor spending an hour of his time in the evening, also attempting it, I can't help but think that if we did a better job at our duties and the details it would be a far better world.
All this feel-good and "find your passion" philosophy is hogwash. Do what needs to be done and do it as well as possible. "Don't sweat the details"? Really? It's the details that will trip us up every single time - it's ALL in the details!
Having just spent a week trying to get a prescription refilled, including my doctor spending an hour of his time in the evening, also attempting it, I can't help but think that if we did a better job at our duties and the details it would be a far better world.
8
Good one. When I served in Dover, Delaware, I bought a push mower and cut my own grass, a section at a time, at my own pace. I deemed it "mowing meditation".
6
Mowing an oversized lawn with a little electric mower was my high school summer torture near Dover. Lately, I replaced an overly heavy Craftsman with a lighter Honda and was surprised at how much easier mowing has become. That's a good thing in summer, when the lawn wants to be levelled every five days.
3
Working hard day in day out, and trying your best to excell in your field probably lead to success but not to lasting happiness.
I mowed the lawn and did the housekeeping for quite a long time, merrily and without whining. As time went on, the spark in me began to flicker and gradually waned simply because there was no space left in my life to cultivate the pleasures of the soul.
At the moment, I am gathering the bits and pieces left of me to start from scratch. Although I have nothing against physical work --in fact I relish gardening --, I share your view that it is compelling to find one´s voice. It is the only way to (re)build a life on solid foundations.
"The aim of life is self-development. To realize one´s own nature perfectly -- that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to oneself." Oscar Wilde
I mowed the lawn and did the housekeeping for quite a long time, merrily and without whining. As time went on, the spark in me began to flicker and gradually waned simply because there was no space left in my life to cultivate the pleasures of the soul.
At the moment, I am gathering the bits and pieces left of me to start from scratch. Although I have nothing against physical work --in fact I relish gardening --, I share your view that it is compelling to find one´s voice. It is the only way to (re)build a life on solid foundations.
"The aim of life is self-development. To realize one´s own nature perfectly -- that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to oneself." Oscar Wilde
12
When I’m in California I have mixed feelings. When I wander up the Pacific Coast Highway from L.A. to Carmel and San Francisco beyond it, I sympathize with Roger’s bafflement as to why one ever leaves. Then, there’s Modesto; or Stockton; or Oxnard; or Compton; or Barstow. While the list above the line is impressive, the list below the line sometimes appears quite endless. Hence … mixed feelings.
Have I offended yet enough perfectly good California towns?
But it takes a “special” soul to find an expression of happiness in the fate of Sisyphus. May as well declare the cons of a bygone age condemned to mere breaking of Mississippi rocks in the Noontime heat as “happy”, because they have something to do rather than merely contemplating their navels in a 7’x7’ cell. It’s a good message for those who might be tempted to grab the mounted guard’s shotgun, but it’s not otherwise compelling.
I prefer Roger’s original speech to graduates of the American School in London. Early self-analysis and efforts to assure, despite the mundaneness of everyday activities, that they somehow move us toward some identifiable end, is valuable stuff to an 18-year-old. I’m afraid that the inherent meaningfulness of rolling a rock up a hill only to watch it roll back down and needing to repeat the cycle for all eternity … isn’t.
Have I offended yet enough perfectly good California towns?
But it takes a “special” soul to find an expression of happiness in the fate of Sisyphus. May as well declare the cons of a bygone age condemned to mere breaking of Mississippi rocks in the Noontime heat as “happy”, because they have something to do rather than merely contemplating their navels in a 7’x7’ cell. It’s a good message for those who might be tempted to grab the mounted guard’s shotgun, but it’s not otherwise compelling.
I prefer Roger’s original speech to graduates of the American School in London. Early self-analysis and efforts to assure, despite the mundaneness of everyday activities, that they somehow move us toward some identifiable end, is valuable stuff to an 18-year-old. I’m afraid that the inherent meaningfulness of rolling a rock up a hill only to watch it roll back down and needing to repeat the cycle for all eternity … isn’t.
10
I can guarantee you that it takes more than 10,000 hours to be a good linguist, and much more than that to publish a serious, extensive work. It was estimated that a scientific work takes an average of 4 years, $50,000 dollars to produce an article read by an average of 25 people. What if you do not get the funding? I have been doing cutting edge research, and I am being marginalized by the capacity to be driven out of departments in favor of yes-men who will merely obey what their professors want. Those of us who challenge theories on solid, scientific grounds or who work with understudied and cutting edge topics find our funding cut or departments unwilling to take us on as PhD students. I have 4 peer-reviewed publications and an 800 on my GRE, yet find myself working without a department or institutional affiliation. Tell me more about that dream. yet, my well-received articles have had more than 25 readers.
7
It took it me 15 years of 12 hours a day 6 days a week to master my subject. Then, when I was able to do ground breaking work on long range weather forecasting using Machine Learning, I was forced out of the field for being out of tune. Now, I have found true happiness and purpose in the insurance industry where they value my insights and abilities. I suggest you do the same. Find somewhere where your talents are appreciated, put in a reasonable work week and enjoy life. I gave up my passion to find happiness and made two lives (mine and my wife's) better in the process. Good luck to you.
1
I feel for you. But my advice is to tough it out. I too had the grind of graduate school, but I persevered. You can look at all of the barriers and challenges as learning experiences and you will benefit from them. I toughed it out in grad school, then worked in the trenches of science for many years. But in the end it worked. From the graduate training you will learn to very deeply know a very specific topic, which is a very specific skill set (which few people have). If you slog through the trenches, as soul-sapping as that an feel sometimes, you can use it as an opportunity to learn very broadly in a wide range of ares, which is again a specific skill set (which again few people have). I did this, and in the end I have been able to turn this deep/broad learning into the most awesome "job" in the world. I get up each day and work with a variety of people on a huge variety of products and technologies, and it is indeed very satisfying. I have found many, many people in the academic fields who are brilliant in their particular areas, but don't have the slightest idea of how to think about a problem outside their area. The fight and the slog are part of the process to get to a higher, and more deeply satisfying, level. Humble yourself, open your mind, and push on. Every, single, solitary task can be seen as a learning experience, from glassware washing to cutting edge research. Learn from them all.
"To find happiness, perform the task well" that jumped off the page at me. I heard those words before. From my dad back in 1973. He worked as a copywriter and had been laid off when he hit 50 and replaced by someone much younger. Lucky for me he hung around the house for a while finding his bearings. I have never forgotten some of the wisdom he shared with me which helped me to prepare for all of life's inevitable disappointments and challenges. Dad was washing a sink full of dishes one day. A task that I must say required organization and effort considering the small sink and the pile of dishes from a family of seven. He turned to me when he finished and said "if you ever find yourself struggling in life do the dishes and do them well. There's value in doing that simple task"
There was a wonderful sense of satisfaction in making order out of chaos and it made an impression on me that has lasted all these years. Doing a simple task and doing it well can lift your spirits when you are down and often jumpstart a day. It worked for dad and it works for me. I highly recommend it.
There was a wonderful sense of satisfaction in making order out of chaos and it made an impression on me that has lasted all these years. Doing a simple task and doing it well can lift your spirits when you are down and often jumpstart a day. It worked for dad and it works for me. I highly recommend it.
19
What is right up there next to your father's wisdom and grace was your own. I wish that I, probably the same age as you in 1973, had been as appreciative of my father, who was also laid off at 50 in that recession and relegated to increasingly lesser jobs thereafter.
"In the everyday task at hand, for woman or man, happiness lurks."
indeed
indeed
1
I very much agree. And I have just truly learned this, though it's been sinking in for some time. The remarkable thing is how much your family, in small quiet ways, show their appreciation. Of course, I'm 85 years old. But better late . . . etc.
3
I know, to enjoy your life while doing day to day chores, you need your health, a good friend, and a little money. You also need to ignore your ambitions and limit your horizon. I do not know if this brings happiness or deliberate ignorance.
4
Nice article. I get it. But, for some reason, it brings to mind the sign that says "Work Will Make You Free." Mr. Cohen must be thinking of pleasant and mundane tasks, rather than those that limit personal growth or crush the soul. The latter are not so difficult to find in our economy. Because of this, beyond acceptance and commitment to the task at hand, people (collectively) need a measure of control over their working and living conditions. That also is key to increasing one's happiness.
11
Commentary and insight of the highest order. Wisdom is rare -this is a true reflection of it -thank you!
Am reminded of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's brilliant book "Flow" on the nature of optimal experiences and the need to develop autotelic behavior.
Am reminded of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's brilliant book "Flow" on the nature of optimal experiences and the need to develop autotelic behavior.
1
Tragedies are endless hard realities.
Complex problems are also infinite, while "utter satisfaction/happiness" is probably an unachievable.
Pulling weeds, separating recyclables, trimming bushes, walking dog, and loading birdfeeders are routine chores & maybe some mild fun, while considered non-achievements in our overall ordinary culture.
NY TIMES columns that are often mutually enjoyable ARE accomplishments.
Complex problems are also infinite, while "utter satisfaction/happiness" is probably an unachievable.
Pulling weeds, separating recyclables, trimming bushes, walking dog, and loading birdfeeders are routine chores & maybe some mild fun, while considered non-achievements in our overall ordinary culture.
NY TIMES columns that are often mutually enjoyable ARE accomplishments.
2
Decency is the core of civilized life but it is surprising how frequently ordinary intelligent and sane people depart from it, particularly on the liberal-left. They seem attracted by the romance of what seems inspirational, by a Che Guevara or Ho Chi Minh or Fidel Castro or Mao, forgetting the toll many of these exacted on their rise to power or influence. They are too willing to ignore or excuse flagrant breaches of decency by people who often are simply misfits, disturbed or sociopathic. It's a misplaced empathy but also an expression of simple fear, I think. An injunction to decency always is a salutary reminder of what really counts and it is no surprise you found one expression in Camus' work, he stood firmly against the leftist illusions which have writ today.
1
Sad to see you throw everyone that doesn't agree with your views under the bus - no wonder the country is so divided and little gets done
I recently read a biography about Louisa May Alcott. I was struck how single-mindedly her father pursued his passions: transcendentalism and philosophy, at the family's expense. He was gone for months at a time on speaking tours, earning little money, and leaving his family home to largely fend for themselves. Follow your passion indeed, but maybe put bread on the table too.
3
Always entertaining to see the rich and influential lecture everyone else on the virtues of hard work.
Roger, I could do your job with one frontal lobe tied behind my back. You, on the other hand, could never do mine.
And I'm quite certain I could give a much better commencement address than you did. Too bad I won't get to do it.
Roger, I could do your job with one frontal lobe tied behind my back. You, on the other hand, could never do mine.
And I'm quite certain I could give a much better commencement address than you did. Too bad I won't get to do it.
1
i question everything that you say
So at the end of the day the last of the hippies has to come full circle and admit it's nothing more or less than 'carry water, chop wood.'
2
Voltaire had the same idea. More or Less
The secret of happiness is the fulfillment of duties, not of desires.
3
And it is desires that shape one's duties
1
That is one of the most depressing things I've ever read. That's existing, not living.
1
Unfortunately most people no longer mow their own lawn: they hire noisy (and of course mostly illegal) "landscaping" companies to do it. thus depriving themselves of the satisfaction of a simple achievement, and their neighbors' peace and quiet.
Actually, when was the last time you got outside and admired what used to be called a "landscape"?
Actually, when was the last time you got outside and admired what used to be called a "landscape"?
5
Ok, ok, then walk your dog.....wait, people hire others to do that now too.
I think it's fair to say that a large part of present day discontent is the disconnect so many have between their actions and the results. Between hiring others to do our "dirty work" to the internet as our source for shopping, conversing, even mating. Theirs something deeply satisfying about the tangible hands on experience of simply doing things, the direct experience. Even if it's something we "don't like to do". It keeps things in perspective.
Surely this can't be the same Roger Cohen who wrote the searing take down of the Greeks earlier this week. 50% of the young people, most of them eager, smart and ambitious do not have the same bright shining future as your children do. AND its NOT their faults by and large. It the Oligarchs as usual who are at the root of the misery. Tsipris is the face of the future and the voters know it.
3
And by the way, Mr. Cohen, congratulations on your daughter's graduation, I hope she learns much and prospers in California.
4
That doctor had a good job but you certainly can't say that for most people.
Maybe you might be satisfied to slave away your life but in doing you are bolstering a slave society. Is it human nature to be a happy slave? I really hope not.
Maybe you are afraid to go to California.
\
Maybe you might be satisfied to slave away your life but in doing you are bolstering a slave society. Is it human nature to be a happy slave? I really hope not.
Maybe you are afraid to go to California.
\
1
Good stuff, Roger. I have had it with the "live your dream" ethos. Life does not come with any guarantees. If you want to follow your dream, fine, but be prepared for disappointment and don't complain when your dream goes unfulfilled. You're better off if you've learned to take some satisfaction in the ordinary. There is plenty of opportunity for this.
2
"So listen to the voice from your soul, quiet but insistent, and honor it. Find what you thrill to: if not the perfect sentence, the beautiful cure, the brilliant formula, the lovely chord, the exquisite sauce, the artful reconciliation. Strive not for everything money can buy but for everything money can’t buy."
Thank you Mr. Cohen, for those wise words.
Thank you Mr. Cohen, for those wise words.
1
Thank you Marcus Aurelius. But should I have unloaded and begun re-loading the dishwasher instead of taking the time to read this? I will ponder that on Saturday morning as I mow the lawn.
2
"Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans." John Lennon told us so in his 1980 song, "Beautiful Boy."
I am fortunate. I am in my mid 40's. Unlike so many others, I have financial security, food, shelter, health, and an engaging and challenging job. Yet like so many type A personalities, I consciously seek to delay my sense of being completely alive, telling myself:
"Wait until next year, when I have advanced to the next rung of responsibility and company management."
"When I retire I will travel the world and do x, y, and z."
"Once the kids are grown up and out of the house, we will do this and that."
John Lennon was right. Life is happening. It goes on all around us, every day. And, for those of us like me, for whom life is good, we should enjoy it. Enjoy the day-to-day work and the challenges and the child raising and all the other experiences of a full human life.
Thanks for the reminder, Mr. Cohen. And, I so dearly hope that John Lennon was able to live his lyrics.
I am fortunate. I am in my mid 40's. Unlike so many others, I have financial security, food, shelter, health, and an engaging and challenging job. Yet like so many type A personalities, I consciously seek to delay my sense of being completely alive, telling myself:
"Wait until next year, when I have advanced to the next rung of responsibility and company management."
"When I retire I will travel the world and do x, y, and z."
"Once the kids are grown up and out of the house, we will do this and that."
John Lennon was right. Life is happening. It goes on all around us, every day. And, for those of us like me, for whom life is good, we should enjoy it. Enjoy the day-to-day work and the challenges and the child raising and all the other experiences of a full human life.
Thanks for the reminder, Mr. Cohen. And, I so dearly hope that John Lennon was able to live his lyrics.
1
I had job as a janitor. Each time I mopped the floor or threw out the garbage I got great satisfaction even knowing full well that the floor would start to get dirty and people would start to throw out their garbage almost immediately after I finished. One day I couldn't do it and immediately got fired.
4
Great column that is much needed in this day and age, especially now that "inspiration" has been rendered meaningless. Quotes on facebook and Beyonce are inspirational. Get real, get to work.
2
Our obligations choose us, not the other way around. That's why you can never be from California.
"To serve your personal vision, protecting it from all plausible substitutes, reasonable approximations, and cowardly compromises, is still the knightly duty of contemporary man. If you shirk this duty, you will never know inner peace. But if you accept the challenge of your vision, even if it is never confirmed, then your life will achieve something that is more important than mere happiness or unhappiness, and that is meaning. Your life will achieve meaning."--THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF JESUS CHRIST
"To serve your personal vision, protecting it from all plausible substitutes, reasonable approximations, and cowardly compromises, is still the knightly duty of contemporary man. If you shirk this duty, you will never know inner peace. But if you accept the challenge of your vision, even if it is never confirmed, then your life will achieve something that is more important than mere happiness or unhappiness, and that is meaning. Your life will achieve meaning."--THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF JESUS CHRIST
1
I have decided I find Roger Cohen to be my favorite NYT columnist. One day we are reading his well informed thoughts about the Iran-USA-Israel triangle and on another, today, just some reflections from someone like me, secure, not facing a terrorist attack, and more interesting and even helpful things to do than I can ever manage.
At 83 I find I am happier every single day than at any time previously. It is the mix of things to be tackled and people to engage with, near and far, and then having each thing work-that is happiness.
And in case you have never lived at 58 degrees N latitude or greater the near absence of darkness probably helps.
Have a good TGIF and the same for the weekend, Roger.
Only-NeverInSweden.blogspot.com
At 83 I find I am happier every single day than at any time previously. It is the mix of things to be tackled and people to engage with, near and far, and then having each thing work-that is happiness.
And in case you have never lived at 58 degrees N latitude or greater the near absence of darkness probably helps.
Have a good TGIF and the same for the weekend, Roger.
Only-NeverInSweden.blogspot.com
2
'Vous devez avoir, dit Candide au Turc, une vaste et magnifique terre? — Je n’ai que vingt arpents, répondit le Turc; je les cultive avec mes enfants; le travail éloigne de nous trois grands maux: l’ennui, le vice, et le besoin.'
~
'Surely you must have,' Candide asked the Turk, 'an extensive and magnificent estate?'
'I have no more than twenty arpents*' replied the latter; 'my children and I look after them; the hard work saves us from three great evils: boredom; vice; and want.'
[*An arpent was about 0.85 of an acre.]
~
'Surely you must have,' Candide asked the Turk, 'an extensive and magnificent estate?'
'I have no more than twenty arpents*' replied the latter; 'my children and I look after them; the hard work saves us from three great evils: boredom; vice; and want.'
[*An arpent was about 0.85 of an acre.]
2
"Try to buy happiness, by the quart or by the yard, and you never find it. Motion it away from you while you turn to duty, and you will find it siting beside your chair." Stephen Leacock
3
Do your work well. Burn your ego. Leave no trace.
2
As in the end of Voltare's Candide... when Pangloss keeps philosophizing about life's meaning and all being for the best stuff... Martin and Candide basically tell him to shut up and just take care of the garden as work, or duty as Roger's describe it, "it is the only way to render life supportable"
1
Such wise words, thank you Mr. Cohen. To do the small and repetitive tasks in life with grace, awareness, and even curiosity, takes discipline and focus. Once these muscles are built, though, they serve well. The result is not really happiness, but contentment.
1
Truly great teachers [and those who aspire thereto] teach for no other reason than the desire to perfect the means to reach the minds --- and souls --- of their students. It's certainly not the financial or sociological (held in high esteem) rewards; so I believe it to be a good example of Mr. Cohen's "thesis."
Mr. Cohen, you're killin' me. The dirty dishes are stacked in the sink, the laundry (tons of it) is waiting to be ironed and/or put away let alone the dirty laundry that's been waiting forever. I'm such a workaholic when it comes to work (teaching) but a real bum when it comes to "mundane" tasks. My friends look around my little, messy apartment and sigh. I have been praying for the INSPIRATION to do my chores and what do I get? Roger Cohen telling me to stop whining and do the task(s) at hand, and not "just do them" but do them well. Ugh! I feel like a 5-year old headed for a meltdown. I can't believe I'm such a baby about chores! But your article is good medicine. I needed it, thank you.
3
Was Sisyphus unhappy or happy? I imagine Sisyphus grinding his way up the hill, sweaty, dirt encrusted with shinned knees not focused on whether or not he was happy or not, but rather completely absorbed with pushing the boulder up the hill, and making sure that he does not slip lest the boulder roll back over him. Sisyphus is not aware that he is sweat and dirt covered nor has skinned knees, nor whether he is happy, unhappy, fulfilling his goals, living up to his peers, getting ahead, living a fulfilling life, etc. etc. Maybe it is all about something else. By the way, "mowing the lawn" is about as Sisyphean as it gets.
32
Well the story goes that Sisyphus got his revenge on the gods by, at one point, as he walked back down to get the boulder, he laughed. Seems pretty danged weak to me as vengeance goes. Anyway as he's in hades or whatever, it doesn't matter if the boulder rolls over him as he can't die, and I'd assume there's no possible way he could be happy.
1
Pulling the dandelions by hand (forsaking chemicals), is more so.
"Was Sisyphus happy?" -- a good topic for the next Room for Debate.
"Was Sisyphus happy?" -- a good topic for the next Room for Debate.
He probably slept well at night.
Brilliant, Roger.
12
Echoes of Tolstoy...Levin tended the farm
13
What a wonderful essay.
Please send a signed copy to Mr. David Brooks. He has certainly lost his way and your words may help him find it.
Please send a signed copy to Mr. David Brooks. He has certainly lost his way and your words may help him find it.
111
Brooks is right -without proper nurturing by evolved and loving parents and a solid education the outcome for happiness is bleak.
Simon and brooks are BOTH brilliant humanists.
OH and while there is dignity in mundane labor, for most it is just mindnumbing enslavement soothed by booze and drugs and TV and self denial.
Simon and brooks are BOTH brilliant humanists.
OH and while there is dignity in mundane labor, for most it is just mindnumbing enslavement soothed by booze and drugs and TV and self denial.
1
My thoughts, exactly!
I'll pay the delivery charges.
2
"Mow the lawn. Collect the dead leaves. Paint the room. Do the dishes. Get a job. Labor until fatigue is in your very bones. Persist day after day. Be stoical. Never whine. Think less about the why of what you do than getting it done. Get the column written."
It seems evident from this and other columns of his that, except for the last thing listed, Mr. Cohen has done none of the others as a job.
Somebody once told RFK that it was easy for him to visit slums and comfort the downtrodden, because in the evening he could go back to his mansion.
Mr. Cohen, let's switch jobs.
It seems evident from this and other columns of his that, except for the last thing listed, Mr. Cohen has done none of the others as a job.
Somebody once told RFK that it was easy for him to visit slums and comfort the downtrodden, because in the evening he could go back to his mansion.
Mr. Cohen, let's switch jobs.
51
I was LOLing at that myself! Yeah, I'll bet he's never cut a lawn in his life. I'd love to test this out by pitting him against a balky old lawnmower.
"Hard work" always makes lazy rich people get misty-eyed with nostalgia.
"Hard work" always makes lazy rich people get misty-eyed with nostalgia.
1
John Xavier III
It is warm comfort for a person to know after a hard day's work of showing compassion to those living in slums that a castle awaits their return in the dusk of the evening.
Here is a story that just came in from an elderly friend in Paris where a nephew of hers, a royal prince, has no intention of resting on his laurels. Recovering from his wounds, he continues the battle, with the help of dedicated public servants from the Congo, to save the vanishing mountain gorillas of Virunga, and many of these dedicated workers have perished.
The battle rages on; a relentless one, where he may never visit his castle again. But he found his mission early in life and nothing will change his mind when it comes to working for the greater cause of humanity and saving our animal sanctuaries.
A fine example of where a true kingdom may be found in one's heart, while living in the dangerous red zones of the world.
National Geographic (google video June 12): A Prince Battles to Save Gorillas Amid Brutal Conflict. Emmanuel de Merode, director of Virunga National Park and a National Geographic Society Explorer of the Year, gives on interview on his life mission and those around him.
It is warm comfort for a person to know after a hard day's work of showing compassion to those living in slums that a castle awaits their return in the dusk of the evening.
Here is a story that just came in from an elderly friend in Paris where a nephew of hers, a royal prince, has no intention of resting on his laurels. Recovering from his wounds, he continues the battle, with the help of dedicated public servants from the Congo, to save the vanishing mountain gorillas of Virunga, and many of these dedicated workers have perished.
The battle rages on; a relentless one, where he may never visit his castle again. But he found his mission early in life and nothing will change his mind when it comes to working for the greater cause of humanity and saving our animal sanctuaries.
A fine example of where a true kingdom may be found in one's heart, while living in the dangerous red zones of the world.
National Geographic (google video June 12): A Prince Battles to Save Gorillas Amid Brutal Conflict. Emmanuel de Merode, director of Virunga National Park and a National Geographic Society Explorer of the Year, gives on interview on his life mission and those around him.
And how come that you are so certain that Mr. Cohen has never mowed the lawn, collected the dead leaves, painted the room, did the dishes? He probably did all those tasks - which are not jobs anyway - before and even while finding his real calling, the one as a commentator about both domestic and foreign policies.
As to RFK, you assert that neither the super rich nor the very well off - including yours truly - can not feel for the less fortunate among us being kept in poverty due to constant cuts in safety nets, all while at the same time lowering the taxes for the highest earners and fat corporations.
As to RFK, you assert that neither the super rich nor the very well off - including yours truly - can not feel for the less fortunate among us being kept in poverty due to constant cuts in safety nets, all while at the same time lowering the taxes for the highest earners and fat corporations.
The world turns on the backs of decent people - who do more for the rest of us than we seem willing to pay them. The economist/sociologist JK Galbraith pointed out that no economic system succeeds with out exploiting someone and something - by underpaying and undervaluing people, places, and things that do more than they need to. Certainly our resources have gotten the short end of that stick. But for people, it sometimes works out for the better? For those taking advantage of the decent ones, maybe they think so, but only if they ignore the immorality of the situation.
23
JFR is so right. There seems to be an inverse correlation at work. The more your job involves helping others face-to-face, the less it pays.
1
Roger: only the wasteful virtues earn the sun.
Dead on the money, Mr. Cohen. I had the good fortune ending up doing ( being a physician ) what gives me extreme pleasure. And loving my job makes it easier to do my job, easier to be decent and do right by my patients. But I did not get there without being Sisyphus first. I toiled and toiled endlessly keeping my mind solely on the toil and nothing else. But unlike Sisyphus, I was able to role my boulder to the top of the hill. Now my two kids have graduated from college. Both the key-note speakers had the same refrain - go out into the world, the world is an oyster, follow your dreams and you will succeed. I thought to myself, what a bunch of baloney. The world is not waiting out there with open arms. It is very cruel draining your mind and soul. Dreams have to take a long rain check. You have to be Sisyphus first. You may have to have a mind-numbing job in the mail-room while you await your dream job. But like Sisyphus one should not mind the monotony. But kids these days are a different breed or rather a product of their times. It's like they have ADD. My kids tell me how old-fashioned I am. When I do dishes, I do dishes. When I fold laundry, I fold laundry. And when I at work, I don't take or make personal calls. So though I work hard, mindless dish washing and laundry is cathartic. As for my kids they are chasing their nebulous American dreams, flitting, anxious instead of putting in Sisyphus time.
136
Your paragraph is better than the entire article.
1
Bring quality to the experience. People will take notice.
Which is the better approach: to fly under the radar or be the man in the arena? The debate remains an interesting one on the path to human progress.
http://lifeamongtheordinary.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-main-in-arena-part-...
Which is the better approach: to fly under the radar or be the man in the arena? The debate remains an interesting one on the path to human progress.
http://lifeamongtheordinary.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-main-in-arena-part-...
3
Voltaire's Candide ends with the phrase "Il faut cultive notre jardin", we must go work in the garden. Some things never change. Those old guys still have valid ideas. Open old books, everybody.
40
Most folks agree that the ending is deeply ironic...
...and certainly not supposed to be a world-view.
...and certainly not supposed to be a world-view.
Be mindful that each moment, we are not separated from the divine, but are imbued with the very stuff of life and existence. In both a scientific and poetic sense, we are literally stardust, coalesced here to glow like froth on the sea of dark matter, dark energy and mystery that gives us shape.
When I'm down, I remind myself of our unity with existence. Whether we are mowing the lawn, nurturing our children, or thinking our thoughts, our "separation" is only part of experience, we are in fact all in this, whatever "This" is, together.
When I'm down, I remind myself of our unity with existence. Whether we are mowing the lawn, nurturing our children, or thinking our thoughts, our "separation" is only part of experience, we are in fact all in this, whatever "This" is, together.
54
Maybe we have to think less about pursuing happiness and more about responsibility, duty, and the dignity of work. Instead of making things easy for our children, we should teach them to persevere and take pride in the effort rather than paving the way for their success. Decent human beings think of others, roll up their sleeves and get the work done. There is a different, deeper happiness in that than the narcissistic pursuit of a selfish kind of happiness. As I get older, material things mean less to me. Life's pleasures are in the small and quiet moments of beauty, love, and contentment.
29
We have really over done the "live your dream" trope. We have collectively beaten it to death, but it springs back to life, especially at commencement time.
I suspect that one reason the dream ideal is so pervasive is that so many people, probably a majority, get to be 50+ and discover ashes in their hands. Marriages fray around the edges and sometimes rot in the middle. The great joy of having children and the pride that follows lessens as kids go through the teen years and often look on their parents as bumbling fools. Then, off to college or life and, Dad, "preserve your memories/that's all that's left you".
One result of overplaying "the dream" is that millions of American kids find themselves adrift. They don't have a dream. Many don't have a clue. Since hitting that big dream target is the goal, they neglect the simple joys of learning how to do things, working in whatever job comes along and growing in the process. They wander around more or less aimlessly, looking for that dream. We are wasting brain power and energy that could be put to use. Meanwhile, those who are eager, such new immigrants from Asia, come in and snatch up the abundant opportunities America offers.
Mr. Cohen is right: the injunction to graduates should be this: do something. Do something well with the intention of helping others and making a better world, but don't let "saving the world" drive out the ordinary good that can be produced in your life. This applies to older people, too.
40
"You should be ashamed to die until you have won some victory for humanity." - Horace Mann
1
However your perspective evolves, Mr. Cohen, you remain a poet.
4
Mr. Cohen will soon start thinking about himself and what HE should be doing. For decades, your life is so dominated by your children that when you're finally free it takes a while for your new freedom to sink in. For a while you mow the lawn but freedom is like a disturbing undercurrent. No need to rush a decision. It will find you.
7
Wonderful column. Thank you.
6
She is off to California? Fuhrgedaboutit. She is gone for good. Took me 35 years after getting there to even think off another place.
3
Just wait until the effects of the drought hit in full -- high water bill costs, dry misery everywhere, high food costs.
It won't seem so much like Paradise. To think of California as this sunlit place of the future, requires that one never gets on the LA freeway system during rush hour.
It won't seem so much like Paradise. To think of California as this sunlit place of the future, requires that one never gets on the LA freeway system during rush hour.
DOING WHAT IT TAKES I like Roger Cohen's piece, as it makes me think of the meaning of life. I dismiss Shakespeare's description in Macbeth: 'Tis a tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. It is nihilistic. It describes a universe where everything about life has no meaning, reflecting a profoundly depressive attitude. I rather prefer the simplicity of the Chinese proverb attributed to Laozi: The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step. Its attitude is both optimistic and pragmatic. So let's invite those starting embarking upon their lives as adults to put one foot in front of the other, until they arrive at their goals. Then walking on beyond them to live fully.
11
I attended public schools and high schools administered by The Protestant School Board of Greater Montreal. When we studied John Milton the Unitarians spoke very much in a soft inaudible whisper and Satan became the heroic figure. It was not until adulthood that I was informed of Milton's contribution to the American Constitution and the education of its founders.
America was meant to be the country that was the Heaven in which we were meant to serve. I understand the dominant position the Protestant minority had in the Quebec economy at the time and why Milton was portrayed to support the better to rule in Hell position but Milton was a "Liberal Puritan" and Jesus was his flesh and blood hero.
Roger, you have written another wonderful essay and seeing it written from Oxford maybe it is time to reintroduce Milton into American Studies and have him be requisite to constitutional scholarship. The perversion of the likes of Bork and Scalia are too dangerous to go unchallenged as we seek a more perfect union.
I offer my congratulations and trust your daughter will be of service to her community wherever she resides.
America was meant to be the country that was the Heaven in which we were meant to serve. I understand the dominant position the Protestant minority had in the Quebec economy at the time and why Milton was portrayed to support the better to rule in Hell position but Milton was a "Liberal Puritan" and Jesus was his flesh and blood hero.
Roger, you have written another wonderful essay and seeing it written from Oxford maybe it is time to reintroduce Milton into American Studies and have him be requisite to constitutional scholarship. The perversion of the likes of Bork and Scalia are too dangerous to go unchallenged as we seek a more perfect union.
I offer my congratulations and trust your daughter will be of service to her community wherever she resides.
17
I would expect that the author would reply that your attempt to inject the petty politics of SCOTUS-divination is not in keeping with the ethos of living honorably in the moment.
But then... it is a subject easier to pontificate about as opposed to actually inhabit.
But then... it is a subject easier to pontificate about as opposed to actually inhabit.
2
SteveRR,
When Milton wrote Paradise Lost it was after Cromwell had turned Jolly Old England into a Hell on Earth Theocracy. I would like to believe my comment was about the interpretation of the constitution and not petty politics. Satan and Jesus both provided excellent arguments on what should be the nature of society. All I am suggesting is that the founders believed in the Jesus side of the argument and that is that we are here to serve.
I am not even suggesting that Bork and Scalia are wrong in their belief system I am only saying that two men one of whom got in a position to interpret the American Constitution have and had little if any understanding of its intent.
When Milton wrote Paradise Lost it was after Cromwell had turned Jolly Old England into a Hell on Earth Theocracy. I would like to believe my comment was about the interpretation of the constitution and not petty politics. Satan and Jesus both provided excellent arguments on what should be the nature of society. All I am suggesting is that the founders believed in the Jesus side of the argument and that is that we are here to serve.
I am not even suggesting that Bork and Scalia are wrong in their belief system I am only saying that two men one of whom got in a position to interpret the American Constitution have and had little if any understanding of its intent.
Sweet column Mr Cohen. Perhaps the ordinary open and transparent are best experienced away from overstimulating phenomena. Perhaps Being is noumenal which we are never separated from ... come what may.
2
Cool column, though it restates an old but legitimate thesis - that life is not a series of milestones, but what happens between those events.
I wound up in a career that had absolutely nothing to do with my passions in life. I was fortunate to be able to get the joy of accomplishment from the mundane. Most jobs well-done necessitate a significant Sisyphean orientation, even while you are looking at the stars. Gotta make the donuts. Better to make them good.
The only other thing I might add - Learn to enjoy collective accomplishments as well as your own. Sometimes, even more. And sports isn't the only avenue for this. Share the load with a couple of friendly neighbors. Help a friend of your child's.
Think global, do local. Do what you can.
I wound up in a career that had absolutely nothing to do with my passions in life. I was fortunate to be able to get the joy of accomplishment from the mundane. Most jobs well-done necessitate a significant Sisyphean orientation, even while you are looking at the stars. Gotta make the donuts. Better to make them good.
The only other thing I might add - Learn to enjoy collective accomplishments as well as your own. Sometimes, even more. And sports isn't the only avenue for this. Share the load with a couple of friendly neighbors. Help a friend of your child's.
Think global, do local. Do what you can.
98
l was born in middle east, a middle class family, my father left us when l was 8, my late brother came to USA,l was in Turkish army for 3 years after my mother than me came to USA, till than l have no idea what was happiness , till than if l was not hungry and my mom and health was ok. that was my happiness, after l came to America l dream to mow the lawn do the dishes, get a job, get marry, have kids, l done that l thought l found happiness but l did not, because l choose a wrong partner for myself so after 25 years marrige and two kids l lost my house and every thing l work for it age 60 now l am 81 years old have 4 grand kids whom l love them so much, and YES first time in my life l am HAPPY, leaving all by myself, but l found happiness and do not ask me where or why or what, l have not the dammest idea, but my kids and grand kids are healthy and l am still kicking that is happiness for me
Having put my three through college, and seeing them more or less happily married and raising their broods, I live on a 15 acre rural property, happily mowing, caring for and improving my property. I belong to a rural service organization that helps others. Caring for my property and helping others is at least as rewarding as my 25 year career in publishing. At 75, I enjoy good health, a good marriage, and my family. I can't imagine a happier outcome. I can only wish the same for my children and grandchildren.
13
Many interesting points but I would hold as still true the comments in his comencement speech. As Joseph Campbell would say "follow your bliss". In today's society of working to live, loving what you do each day is vastly important.
3
The inspirational isn't just over-rated, it's over-promoted. "I dropped out, founded a startup and made a billion". Yeah, that's you out of how many other dropouts? "I achieved security and satisfaction as a writer". Well, you don't hear much about writers who don't achieve that, do you? "My degree in creative writing/political anthropology/social differentiation studies was worth all the money I borrowed to get it". Tell that to the barista paying off a loan on minimum wage.
The tragedy is that many of the "inspirational" stories are published, without a contrary voice being heard, by outlets such as this one.
The tragedy is that many of the "inspirational" stories are published, without a contrary voice being heard, by outlets such as this one.
7
Happiness is a state of mind which is and can be different for different people.
The Seven Deadly Sins comes to mind. It was Warren Buffet who said "envy" is the most deadly sin of all. When people live with envy, happiness is not possible. Contemporary culture thrives on envy.
The Seven Deadly Sins comes to mind. It was Warren Buffet who said "envy" is the most deadly sin of all. When people live with envy, happiness is not possible. Contemporary culture thrives on envy.
5
"Contemporary culture thrives on envy". Couldn't agree more.
And envy's twin is greed.
And envy's twin is greed.
Thank you for this. It isn't like the naive "when I was young" drivel spoken by valdictorians I suspect I'll be hearing at my son's high school graduation in a couple of weeks.
2
Polish the silver. It's more fun. Young people don't want to inherit the family silver and prefer ,once they can afford it, to hire someone to mow the lawn while they're at the restaurant. They work and work and work for fear of losing the precious job that they feel they must keep. SAD!
1
Another beautiful column from Mr. Cohen and a stark contest to David Brooks today.
8
Roger! This is one of the best columns you wrote! "I’ve grown suspicious of the inspirational. It’s overrated" I could not agree more.
Unless of course you derive your inspiration from ordinary people doing ordinary tasks which are so essential to our lives. Hello! Good Morning! Have Nice a day! Kinda thing.
And I beg the editor to refrain from posting stupid comments at least for this special column. Some of the comments that I have read so far are Both Amazing and INSPIRATIONAL!
Unless of course you derive your inspiration from ordinary people doing ordinary tasks which are so essential to our lives. Hello! Good Morning! Have Nice a day! Kinda thing.
And I beg the editor to refrain from posting stupid comments at least for this special column. Some of the comments that I have read so far are Both Amazing and INSPIRATIONAL!
5
>>>Want to be happy? Mow the lawn. Collect the dead leaves.
I love mowing the lawn with my world war II era push mower, hearing it chirp like crickets, pushing back against the ever-encroaching wild areas on the fringes, occasionally seeing a frog or a small snake in the grass, and having the satisfaction of its neatness when mown. In fact, I do the mowing in 15-20 minute increments on different days, rather than all at once. That way, it never becomes a chore.
I don't like the raking at all.
And as for work, I write, like Cohen, and some of what I write is stuff I'd write even if I weren't paid for it (and often I'm not) while other stuff pays the bills. The latter is often satisfying, but the former brings joy.
But what is most satisfying in life is connecting with other H. sapiens, whether in a coffee house, in a bar, in Whole Foods (where I frequently talk to strangers), or being with friends or relatives. We are, above all, a highly social species.
I love mowing the lawn with my world war II era push mower, hearing it chirp like crickets, pushing back against the ever-encroaching wild areas on the fringes, occasionally seeing a frog or a small snake in the grass, and having the satisfaction of its neatness when mown. In fact, I do the mowing in 15-20 minute increments on different days, rather than all at once. That way, it never becomes a chore.
I don't like the raking at all.
And as for work, I write, like Cohen, and some of what I write is stuff I'd write even if I weren't paid for it (and often I'm not) while other stuff pays the bills. The latter is often satisfying, but the former brings joy.
But what is most satisfying in life is connecting with other H. sapiens, whether in a coffee house, in a bar, in Whole Foods (where I frequently talk to strangers), or being with friends or relatives. We are, above all, a highly social species.
7
I recall the words of an old halibut fisherman from Alaska who said, "The best thing about this job is the quitting." On the other hand, there's the old saying, "Find something you love to do & you'll never work a day in your life." Those of us who've found the latter have to be thankful. Those of gnarled & bent body, who've lived a life of hard knocks, are the ones who told us, "Get that sheepskin." It is for those we have the greatest fondness, even if we never took their advice.
1
A point learned over 60+ years - there is happiness in the mundane, much more so than in the "excitable". Mr. Cohen is saying much the same.
3
After the destruction of the World Trade Towers, there was an enormous pile of bricks and rubble that needed to be cleared before rebuilding could begin.
Someone paid tribute to the laborers from Brooklyn and Queens and Long Island who understood that the project could only proceed with the removal of each single brick and block, each coil of ruined wire, piece by piece until the job was done and the site cleared.
I do agree that life proceeds by the stitch and in each stitch is happiness found.
Someone paid tribute to the laborers from Brooklyn and Queens and Long Island who understood that the project could only proceed with the removal of each single brick and block, each coil of ruined wire, piece by piece until the job was done and the site cleared.
I do agree that life proceeds by the stitch and in each stitch is happiness found.
8
perhaps it's even simpler than that: we've evolved to be on the move nearly constantly, so we get a sense of well-being from being active (it's what we're 'designed' to do) - and don't feel right when overly sedentary. evolution favored fattening up when possible, resting when possible, so we have built-in preferences that, put frankly, will speed us to an early death from heart disease if we overindulge them. in other words, keep moving, and understand that our bodies give us messages that, while useful in a bygone time, now should be seen as potentially dangerous. no need to invoke loftier concepts when simpler ones suffice.
Excellent. The notion of common, everyday decency, so much forgotten in today's world of superheroes and megamoney.
5
Great essay, but the formula for happiness is to transcendental for today's American youth, mired as they are in the muck of marketing propaganda, consumerism and status.
6
Give up your ego, that is the source of your problems. I am an overachiever who listened to my ego for a long time and while it has brought me success, I found contentment by experiencing ego deaths.
10
Well said Mr. Cohen. I try to live up to certain standards myself. I don't do the dishes often enough, and I never mow the lawn (got asked to do it once, and did such a catastrophic job of it I was never asked again). But I do try to live up to my word, and I realized long ago after doing some not-so-great things, that whatever actions I undertook, I'd have to live with the memory of having done them. I'll always remember that girl in college I broke up with in an unkind way, or that pointless petty vandalism, and so on. So I try to always do things that will give me memories I can accept and live with.
Also as an aside, since Mr. Cohen often writes about Iran and Israel, when I saw the title "mow the lawn", I figured the article was an exhortation to Bibi to get back to 'cutting the grass' in Gaza only with a metaphorical riding lawnmower. It's an unfortunate world we've inherited, that this assumption was so easy to make.
Also as an aside, since Mr. Cohen often writes about Iran and Israel, when I saw the title "mow the lawn", I figured the article was an exhortation to Bibi to get back to 'cutting the grass' in Gaza only with a metaphorical riding lawnmower. It's an unfortunate world we've inherited, that this assumption was so easy to make.
4
My thought is that Roger Cohen is at a phase in his life when inspiration does not inspire because he has already crossed several life stages. Many of those life stages did include inspiration in some form. When we are youthful we may be inspired by great athleticism; when we are in middle age we may be inspired by spiritual matters. In our later years we may find comfort in the mundane where the ordinary doesn't look inspiring but somehow provides great joy. That joy is what we call happiness.
It's all good.
It's all good.
69
Wonderful article. A saying I'v heard around tables while drinking coffee is: "We act our way into good thinking, rather than think our way into good acting."
Thanks for the thoughtful column.
Thanks for the thoughtful column.
2
Duh, Roger, it's called being an observant Jew.
2
Lovely. Hope your colleague David Brooks reads this. he seems to be very muddled about bringing up kids and adulthood, college apps, finding happiness etc etc. He seems to be seeking formula for success. What he doesn't understand is that 7 billion people on earth, all - each and everyone - is seeking happiness in their own way. There is no formula, there is no one glove fits all. As many minds that many unique and original ways to follow containment, happiness, bliss and calling.
5
Chop wood, carry water. Good job Mr. Cohen.
6
Well if mowing the lawn is the answer, California might not be the place to go. Get out of the city and look up on a cloudless night, behold the wonders.
5
Sitting here reading this wonderful essay as I watch another possibly severe Oklahoma storm rolling in. Wondering if I'll be able to get the grass cut today.
2
Stand up straight,
Smile,
Pay attention to your breath,
Observe the miracle,
Repeat.
Smile,
Pay attention to your breath,
Observe the miracle,
Repeat.
3
The 10,000 hour rule and doing the mundane well is missing from a culture that continually pushes the role of inspiration-genius in becoming successful and that becomes easily bored by doing small tasks well. As I write this I am watching my next store neighbor mowing his lawn while texting. Must go to protect my garden from the mundane run wild.
3
"Do what you must before you do what you want." Cohen is right. Not one of these words has more than six letters. Every kindergartener could understand them. But precious few are taught them.
116
Yes, before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. But if you are not seeking enlightenment, you are wasting your life.
First be a man, yes. But don't knock heroism and sainthood. Fulfill your everyday tasks, yes. But if you're not experiencing ecstasy, you're experiencing maya; illusion. Know thy Self.
First be a man, yes. But don't knock heroism and sainthood. Fulfill your everyday tasks, yes. But if you're not experiencing ecstasy, you're experiencing maya; illusion. Know thy Self.
4
Yes your are right on, but ecstasy is sometimes not there, so keep chopping and carrying.
"Want to be happy? Mow the lawn."
Absolutely. Just not in California, okay? We're getting rid of them. Drought and all, y'know?
Absolutely. Just not in California, okay? We're getting rid of them. Drought and all, y'know?
6
Well said, Mr. Cohen. Thank you.
6
Mr. Cohen, you write for a paper that has raised whining to an art form and yet your essay counsels don't whine. Your piece is an affirmation that actually doing something (not sniping about something) is rewarding and fulfilling. Well done. Now let's hope your observations rub off on your colleagues at the NY Times.
3
If I was giving a graduation speech today, I'd say find your heroes in life early and stick with them. Mine were my parents, Abraham Lincoln, H.L. Mencken, Willie Mays and the soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen who defeated
Hitler and made it possible for me to live free in this blessed country. Over the years, I discovered that Lincoln and Mencken had a few
flaws, but I never discovered any in my parents, Willie or the soldiers.
Hitler and made it possible for me to live free in this blessed country. Over the years, I discovered that Lincoln and Mencken had a few
flaws, but I never discovered any in my parents, Willie or the soldiers.
4
"You put four children through high school, and you find yourself reflecting"
Three for me, at the same point just now.
I disagree somewhat. Yes, application to the task at hand and hard work are vital to happiness.
However, one must balance that by looking up from the grinding wheel to see a longer view. Otherwise, one can grind away and get nowhere, not happy either.
Also, one must work to live, not live to work. Happiness is in the living, not the working. It includes work, and hard work, and paying attention doing that work. It also includes much more, a more that is at least as important to real happiness.
Three for me, at the same point just now.
I disagree somewhat. Yes, application to the task at hand and hard work are vital to happiness.
However, one must balance that by looking up from the grinding wheel to see a longer view. Otherwise, one can grind away and get nowhere, not happy either.
Also, one must work to live, not live to work. Happiness is in the living, not the working. It includes work, and hard work, and paying attention doing that work. It also includes much more, a more that is at least as important to real happiness.
39
I'm with you. I'm towards the tail end of a career which has been for the most part satisfying and which many would deem successful. However, when I reflect on the highlights of my life so far, they include the couple of years spent ski bumming, the extended family trips taken and the efforts supporting those less fortunate than I have been. I have friends and co-workers, good earnest folks, who have let their jobs/careers become the be-all and end-all of who their existence, missing out on all types of opportunities to enrich their lives in other ways. I grieve for them.
1
Ideals are the vessel in which we place are actions. They are the labels for what we do. There is no ideal without the tasks that inform it. Ideals which are not given substance by acts are mere postures. So when someone preaches love for our fellow man but fails to offer a hand, be it in form of actual work or supporting measures to help people, he is nothing but the seller of snake oil. Unfortunately, we have many of them.
10
I may have underestimated Mr. Cohen. His essay today is probably the best in terms of substance and style that I'll read today--and I read a lot of other op-eds. Cohen identifies an issue that interests me greatly. As a second-generation American and a geezer, I can clearly see how the disciplined work habits of my Germanic grand-parents and parents are increasingly diluted in the third and fourth generations of my family here in America. In contemporary America, habitual hard work, frugality, responsibility, and similar values persist to some extent, but a lot of slackers also survive and prosper. I'm trying to believe that all in all this trend is not such a bad thing.
40
If you think that is good, you should read it in the original German.
1
unfortunately i think it is a "bad thing" and although it is definitely increasing in strength i don't think that it is a benefit to the world......i don't know if it can be stopped or somehow reversed and whether this is another part of what will eventually turn civilization backwards
If you want happiness for an hour—take a nap. If you want happiness for a day—go fishing. If you want happiness for a month—get married. If you want happiness for a year—inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime—help others.
I've seen it written that if you want happiness for a lifetime - get a garden.
Both work as far as I'm concerned
I've seen it written that if you want happiness for a lifetime - get a garden.
Both work as far as I'm concerned
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Keep a garden, and it will keep you.
Actually the saying is, not "get" a garden, but make one. Which is sort of the point Cohen is making.
I got a fish. That's just as good for happiness.
Another gem from Roger Cohen. Congratulations to Adele.
And now, before it rains in upstate New York, I have to mow the lawn.
And now, before it rains in upstate New York, I have to mow the lawn.
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I would add just two things to this thoughtful column: Be kind. And, live in the moment, for that is what we have.
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My college commencement speaker told us to pursue our dreams !!! If I pursued my college dreams I would still be in prison.
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It sounds like happiness is being compassionate and being content with that compassion.
18
I forwarded your column to my granddaughter who just graduated from college and in July will begin a career in New York City. Seldom do I see her for time and age are now limiting; but your words are advice to be respected-and taken.
Jim,
Wilmette, Illinois
Jim,
Wilmette, Illinois
8
And I thought the column was going to discuss Netanyahu's policy "mow the grass" which likens Palestinians to blades of grass. Instead---talk of happiness. Quite a jump.
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Or maybe it could have been directed at the Palestinians, who rather than try to deal with the mundane, they develop ways to attack Israelis instead of developing their civil society.
2
Unlike the ancient Spartans and Romans, Jewish civilization was not dominated by warriors, but rather religious leaders, physicians, lawyers and academics. However, since the establishment of modern Israel, necessity has become the mother of invention and consistent with the "10,000 hours" of Malcolm Gladwell's "Outliers," they have mastered the skills and technology of the warrior to maintain their nation's independence and territorial integrity.
The necessity of developing warrior skills long preceded Mr. Netanyahu's ascendance to Prime Minister, however his military service in one of the I.D.F.'s elite units provided him the necessary knowledge and experience in military operations.
"Mowing the Lawn" has become one of those routine responsibilities of Israeli leaders due to the repetitive nature of Hamas' repeated rocket attacks on Israeli civilian communities. Ordinance, including defensive measures, such as the "Iron Dome" anti-missile system are expensive to develop and deploy; when they are no longer needed, they will no longer be deployed.
The necessity of developing warrior skills long preceded Mr. Netanyahu's ascendance to Prime Minister, however his military service in one of the I.D.F.'s elite units provided him the necessary knowledge and experience in military operations.
"Mowing the Lawn" has become one of those routine responsibilities of Israeli leaders due to the repetitive nature of Hamas' repeated rocket attacks on Israeli civilian communities. Ordinance, including defensive measures, such as the "Iron Dome" anti-missile system are expensive to develop and deploy; when they are no longer needed, they will no longer be deployed.
as a pediatrician, i can relate. i don't save lives. i don't staunch bleeding. at my best i connect with people, reassure, and try to model civility and humanity as i go about my vocation. that is something all of us can do, and are indeed called to do, regardless of our "job" - spouse, parent, sibling, child, co-worker, consumer, citizen. go forth and be happy, whatever hat you wear!
A Musing Pediatrician
A Musing Pediatrician
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Life is not about doing what inspires you as much as finding grace and inspiration in what you do.
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The wisdom of Roger Cohen's piece is clear. But it is a stage-of-life matter. The young are ignited by inspiration, glory, the reach to the beyond, the battle for an ideal. Not toil in the service of ordinariness. They, if they are fortunate, will replace the search for glory with integrity and genuine productivity. And they will do it without falling into cynicism and bitterness.
62
This essay defines my father. Over the 61 years of my life, I have grown to have so much respect for his attitude and way of life. At 84 he continues to mow the lawn and affably take care of business -- and my mom. He's my role model.
34
I had a grad school friend years ago who spoke in glowing terms about his desire to help those in need. His thoughts were large and magnanimous. Yet, when another friend and I needed help moving, he could not find the time. I always thought that he missed engaging in life and love while he dreamed himself into the glorious.
I am also reminded of a reaction I have when I used to visited the home of my brother as my nieces and nephew were growing. It was a home with 5 kids. What struck me was the never-ending and repetitive nature of so much. My sister-in-law would clean up the kitchen, but in no time it was messy again. She'd finish with cleaning up with one meal, but soon be started on the next. Life is, indeed, lived out in acts of do-finish-repeat. If we cannot fully live into such sameness with some joi de verve, we will most certainly either sink into despair or need to escape into fantasy of the grand life.
I am also reminded of a reaction I have when I used to visited the home of my brother as my nieces and nephew were growing. It was a home with 5 kids. What struck me was the never-ending and repetitive nature of so much. My sister-in-law would clean up the kitchen, but in no time it was messy again. She'd finish with cleaning up with one meal, but soon be started on the next. Life is, indeed, lived out in acts of do-finish-repeat. If we cannot fully live into such sameness with some joi de verve, we will most certainly either sink into despair or need to escape into fantasy of the grand life.
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Joi de verve is a beautiful discovery. There's unexpected wisdom in smartphones, I'm starting to think.
7
Joi de verve - choix de vivre.
3
joie de vivre!
1
It took me a long time to get that. It seemed like making a virtue, a dull one at that, out of necessity. But the Zen of it is that occupying the body frees the mind.