The kind of people David Brooks refers to - those souls whom others admire for their deep selflessness - are ones who integrate that kind of thinking into all areas of life. The mark of a true person of character, in my mind, sublimates the self in the interest of the other. In all interactions, in all ways of thinking, it is the other that matters. As almost all world religions claim, such is the essence of the Golden Rule - "Let me love and serve the other AT LEAST as much as I love and serve myself." If every person, in all their thinking and acting, practiced such an ideal, violence, hate, anger and inequality would cease.
50
Well said and well written. One point that Mr. Brooks only briefly touched on is self-delusion. The biggest step for most in achieving a better moral compass is realizing that we are animals with an incredible ability to self-delude--to rationalize our immoral behaviors as moral, or at least not that big a deal. That 4 bedroom home out in the burbs burning through power all winter and summer, the gas-guzzling SUV, all needed for the benefit of children (moral? immoral?). The job with negative externality after negative externality? Well if I don't do it, someone else will anyway. etc, etc. Kids, teenagers, adults, everyone should be taught that when making decisions, stop for a second and ask yourself how might I be foregoing morality through self-delusion in this case.
50
Has anyone else noticed that the specific examples Brooks gives are of women ... ?
75
Mr. Brooks has described the essence of the Christian life--one which so many Christians who are prisoners to doctrine and formalism (as well as love of "the world") do not understand. The problem for reaching the state he describes is the fraility of the human psyche and logos. A Christian recognizes that a human is inherently unable, on her own steam, to reach the states (humility, etc.) he describes. Human pride, that most wicked of sins, inevitably interrupts the journey. It is only by accepting Christ as Savior and letting his Spirit work in you that there is hope. Christ then receives the credit, not the human. If there is one part of Mr. Brooks' essay that troubled me it is that he seemed to imply that Dorothy Day was transformed by the birth of her child when her life change was the direct result of her conversion to the Christian faith.
27
This might be one of the best things I've read by any regular NYT columnist. It lacks the hokey, simplistic narrative of so many "seize your life!" books and tracts, it doesn't set me up to get me to spend money on something, and keeps it real about the difficulties of pursuing a more meaningful life in this society.
There's a lot we can all add here about the larger systemic and institutional factors, like commercial capitalism, colonialism, white supremacy, etc., that make such a shift in one's life difficult, and provide the foundation for a society that makes such people unfortunately so rare. But I think this column can inspire and deepen those conversations.
Mr. Brooks, I am generally dismayed by much of what you write. Today I want to give you a hug, and say thank you from the bottom of my heart for a beautiful piece.
There's a lot we can all add here about the larger systemic and institutional factors, like commercial capitalism, colonialism, white supremacy, etc., that make such a shift in one's life difficult, and provide the foundation for a society that makes such people unfortunately so rare. But I think this column can inspire and deepen those conversations.
Mr. Brooks, I am generally dismayed by much of what you write. Today I want to give you a hug, and say thank you from the bottom of my heart for a beautiful piece.
88
This essay is beautiful. Marvelous, perceptive insights. Hard to believe the cynical comments from readers. So many unhappy people. Good that they read this. Upon reflection It may help them.
43
There is reason to believe that, though I fully understand what Mr. Brooks is saying, Education has a hand on working in the opposite direction, seeing students from the head up, only, and as vessels to simply fill with "information," when the path of education should be towards enlightenment.
I read a great piece, today, about this and that compliments Mr. Brooks' article, but shows a way through this in Education. Here's a teaser (the rest can be found here: http://www.communityworksinstitute.org/cwjonline/essays/a_essaystext/vil...
"A re-moralization of U.S. society is not going to happen if we push students away from themselves, if we demand that they park their angst and fear somewhere and just take the information we're imparting. This just makes matters worse since it suggests a lack of care, an inability to recognize that a student's life matters, that a student already brings into our classrooms philosophies and ideas—and that it's our responsibility to let these live, to use these as ways into difficult and challenging ideas, to test them through inquiry.
We must help the notion that different voices can be help to solve problems because we have all the resources we need to tackle our challenges—but we may not have the will.
But how can we have will if passion and desire are directed towards material objects and the importance we give tasks and degrees, not what a person can imagine? This is the moral conundrum."
I read a great piece, today, about this and that compliments Mr. Brooks' article, but shows a way through this in Education. Here's a teaser (the rest can be found here: http://www.communityworksinstitute.org/cwjonline/essays/a_essaystext/vil...
"A re-moralization of U.S. society is not going to happen if we push students away from themselves, if we demand that they park their angst and fear somewhere and just take the information we're imparting. This just makes matters worse since it suggests a lack of care, an inability to recognize that a student's life matters, that a student already brings into our classrooms philosophies and ideas—and that it's our responsibility to let these live, to use these as ways into difficult and challenging ideas, to test them through inquiry.
We must help the notion that different voices can be help to solve problems because we have all the resources we need to tackle our challenges—but we may not have the will.
But how can we have will if passion and desire are directed towards material objects and the importance we give tasks and degrees, not what a person can imagine? This is the moral conundrum."
15
A lovely column for a beautiful Sunday morning. Food for thought about what really matters. Good work David. Very inspirational.
25
"They are not thinking about what wonderful work they are doing. They are not thinking about themselves at all."
Some versions of Christianity and of Buddhism offer disciplined paths to such an attitude. I would expect other religions as well.
Secular ideals don't go where Brooks wants, at least not in the West in 2015. Their goal is the enhancement and perfection of the individual, a focus on self that clashes with what he describes. On the one hand: "Be all you can be.On the other: "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.
Some versions of Christianity and of Buddhism offer disciplined paths to such an attitude. I would expect other religions as well.
Secular ideals don't go where Brooks wants, at least not in the West in 2015. Their goal is the enhancement and perfection of the individual, a focus on self that clashes with what he describes. On the one hand: "Be all you can be.On the other: "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.
15
More and more, people are becoming part of the obscene enterprise of, earning a living as part of dishonest, profit-seeking 'enterprises'.
More and more, profit-earning companies are at a loss to compete at all, money, unless they are part of a 'crony' capitalist system.
So for a person with any conscience whatever, there's no choice except: 1) to take no job and suffer the consequences of poverty;
2) live on an inheritance; 2) ask for government help, i.e. help from same government that has chosen more or less to condone a capitalist system that has gone rogue.
So what is left in terms of 'free time'? A person can keep 'beating his head against the wall' if he tries even to think of any 'practical' means of living in a society totally given in to compromising with such a system, or can perhaps vainly just try to ignore any such thoughts of being a useful or good member of society.
Very few people can both compromise their principles in the first place so as to gain any credibility as a person, and at same time care to add something of value, or help bring American society and its declining values back to decency and meaningfulness as an actual civilization instead of sorry end result of a republic run amok.
People can hardly do that if they have forgotten what is meant not to compromise any values they may ever have had in the first place.
And these are the same people who don't appreciate anything except the money motive or something produced only by that.
More and more, profit-earning companies are at a loss to compete at all, money, unless they are part of a 'crony' capitalist system.
So for a person with any conscience whatever, there's no choice except: 1) to take no job and suffer the consequences of poverty;
2) live on an inheritance; 2) ask for government help, i.e. help from same government that has chosen more or less to condone a capitalist system that has gone rogue.
So what is left in terms of 'free time'? A person can keep 'beating his head against the wall' if he tries even to think of any 'practical' means of living in a society totally given in to compromising with such a system, or can perhaps vainly just try to ignore any such thoughts of being a useful or good member of society.
Very few people can both compromise their principles in the first place so as to gain any credibility as a person, and at same time care to add something of value, or help bring American society and its declining values back to decency and meaningfulness as an actual civilization instead of sorry end result of a republic run amok.
People can hardly do that if they have forgotten what is meant not to compromise any values they may ever have had in the first place.
And these are the same people who don't appreciate anything except the money motive or something produced only by that.
10
Whenever I read your column, I am reminded of a quote by Emerson, "Your actions speak so loudly, I can not hear what you are saying.”
You can "preach" all you want about what makes a moral person, but by actively supporting the GOP, the party of intolerance, I cannot hear what you say.
You can "preach" all you want about what makes a moral person, but by actively supporting the GOP, the party of intolerance, I cannot hear what you say.
93
"She made unshakable commitments in all directions. She became a Catholic, started a radical newspaper, opened settlement houses for the poor and lived among the poor, embracing shared poverty as a way to build community, to not only do good, but be good. This gift of love overcame, sometimes, the natural self-centeredness all of us feel." Nothing stopping you from doing that as a Jew. Even if you don't live among the poor, starting a radical newspaper would be an extraordinary example of the powerful transformation that you seek for yourself.
12
This unusual column (at least from a pundit originally offered as a commentator on public affairs -- clearly much less so recently) understandably evokes sharply contrasting responses.
It is a strong, personally risk-taking, statement of support for seeking an authentically moral life, with an admirably broad array of examples, sources, and testimonials.
At the same time the sharp contrast between the sort of moral sensitivity advocated, and the public policy prescriptions of those for whom Brooks seems generally to be an apologist, is too glaring not to arouse fierce retorts.
Does this suggest that the blind spot that afflicts us all when we try to see ourselves is one of the very greatest obstacles to living an optimally moral life?
It is a strong, personally risk-taking, statement of support for seeking an authentically moral life, with an admirably broad array of examples, sources, and testimonials.
At the same time the sharp contrast between the sort of moral sensitivity advocated, and the public policy prescriptions of those for whom Brooks seems generally to be an apologist, is too glaring not to arouse fierce retorts.
Does this suggest that the blind spot that afflicts us all when we try to see ourselves is one of the very greatest obstacles to living an optimally moral life?
27
I enjoyed this and shared it.
I think if you consider all others as your equals, you are well on your way to developing that inner light. This is difficult to do. If you have never been poor, how can you understand the ghetto drug addict's need to escape? If you have never been in the lower half of the IQ curve, how do you understand those for whom additional education will be meaningless? If you have never been wealthy, how do you understand the avaricious, isolating nature of the rich and powerful?
Forgive all you meet for their shortcomings, and yourself for yours.
I think if you consider all others as your equals, you are well on your way to developing that inner light. This is difficult to do. If you have never been poor, how can you understand the ghetto drug addict's need to escape? If you have never been in the lower half of the IQ curve, how do you understand those for whom additional education will be meaningless? If you have never been wealthy, how do you understand the avaricious, isolating nature of the rich and powerful?
Forgive all you meet for their shortcomings, and yourself for yours.
30
I sought my soul, but my soul I could not see. I sought my God, but my God eluded me. I sought my brother, and I found all three.
I am not quite sure who wrote this, but it was a revelation to me when I first read it. It's through forgetting our own problems long enough to be of service to others, that connects us to our true selves and God. The inner light happens to people, it is a product, but I don't think it's ever the goal.
I am not quite sure who wrote this, but it was a revelation to me when I first read it. It's through forgetting our own problems long enough to be of service to others, that connects us to our true selves and God. The inner light happens to people, it is a product, but I don't think it's ever the goal.
28
David, thank you for this column. It seems to me, and to many others, that Barack Obama is at core the kind of "good people" you admire and are aspiring to become. I am often puzzled by your overlooking this core aspect of our President, whether or not you choose to agree with his policies. After reading this column I am hopeful that in this phase of your life, you will view Obama from a different perspective, rather than continue to demean him in your public and influential work.
75
Please ask Mr. Brooks to supply members of the House of Representatives and the Senate with copies of this column. And sooner rather than later.
47
So if the "meritocracy" requires you to promote & sell this superficial version of yourself, it's not really a "meritocracy", is it? More like a "race to the bottom." This is a fundamental contradiction that Brooks is always trying to gloss over, the contradiction between human values & market values.
28
For the past 3 years, I have been giving Easy buttons from Staples, as thank you gifts. The buttons simply says, "that was easy". The idea is to encourage people to take simple easy steps in life, especially to give to others.
So, now I have give away over 100 Easy buttons, one at a time. Staples has a new Global Easy button, which speaks in 7 languages, from 12 countries. They can be gotten online for $7 each.
Sending this comment was easy, but I did not have to do it. It took one easy step. THANKS David Brooks
So, now I have give away over 100 Easy buttons, one at a time. Staples has a new Global Easy button, which speaks in 7 languages, from 12 countries. They can be gotten online for $7 each.
Sending this comment was easy, but I did not have to do it. It took one easy step. THANKS David Brooks
5
I do worry that most people won't ever have a defining moment that spins them in an altruistic, life-changing direction. The majority of us need to pay attention to the everyday examples of helping others in a consistent and devoted way. These don't have to be grand movements; simple can be life-changing, too. I don't think people who are actually doing the good works are searching for or would even say that they have an "inner light." Unselfish people don't have time for such self-reflection. Sometimes you just have to keep doing the good works and there is great beauty and satisfaction in that.
7
Every trait is double edged. It has a softness and a hardness. There's no right in the abstract.
3
What a beautiful mind David Brooks has and just the inspiration I needed for a Sunday morning. (But I have to admit he had me at his use of the feminine pronoun!) Thank you!
9
David Brooks is searching for meaning in his life. Realizing the hourglass runs out and saying "Who do I want to be?" in his twilight years, while perhaps there is still time to make a mark, or maybe-- experience true happiness--the happiness and contentment that he sees in other people who have found their life's calling? But he forgets that his life's calling has provided millions of people with information, perspective, and knowledge and helped them shape their vision of their lives and the world. Maybe what he is lamenting is that he didn't generate this through some selfless, altruistic goal of making the world a better place. He didn't suffer enough. Or, maybe he did. (Deadlines are a horror). But he did well and he did good through his work--even if that wasn't necessarily his intention. I'm not sure suffering has to be a prerequisite to salvation, but I might be in the minority.
9
Thank you for the moral uplift and paean to left-of-center figures. I certainly agree that these attitudes are a positive contribution to discourse.
I guess for non-resume morality, you want me to vote for Rand Paul, doctor w/o board-ers approval, or Cruz, the eternal nay-sayer, or Jeb the non-Hispanic Hispanic, or Bachman, the tireless crusader against injections of autism, or Perry, the guy who can't count past 2, or the neurosurgeon who opposes MediCare, ObamaCare, and any care for the non-carefree.I do not doubt your sincere care for moral leadership, just wonder how you can hold that, describe Obama-like qualities when praising Lincoln, and walk a straight line. Tell us which GOPer has the Lincoln's spiritual qualities, Perkins' concern for government aid for the poor, and Day's leftist concept of society. If you say Romney or Santorum or Palin or McCain, I'll know this column was meant for April 1st.
I guess for non-resume morality, you want me to vote for Rand Paul, doctor w/o board-ers approval, or Cruz, the eternal nay-sayer, or Jeb the non-Hispanic Hispanic, or Bachman, the tireless crusader against injections of autism, or Perry, the guy who can't count past 2, or the neurosurgeon who opposes MediCare, ObamaCare, and any care for the non-carefree.I do not doubt your sincere care for moral leadership, just wonder how you can hold that, describe Obama-like qualities when praising Lincoln, and walk a straight line. Tell us which GOPer has the Lincoln's spiritual qualities, Perkins' concern for government aid for the poor, and Day's leftist concept of society. If you say Romney or Santorum or Palin or McCain, I'll know this column was meant for April 1st.
29
"To be happy, be compassionate. To make others happy, be compassionate" (Dalai Lama)
17
Oh, my greatest hope is that David Brooks, who really seems like a good person, is choosing to eschew those dog-eat-dog, me-first values he supports in the Republican Party. There is always hope.
15
David, you make references in your article to the admirable good deeds people like Dorothy Day and Frances Perkins accomplished largely for the poor and downtrodden, and the "outstretched arm" of the stumbler, ready to receive and offer assistance, and your cogent reference to "eulogy virtues". Aren't your tredding on thin ice? You sound suspiciously like a Democrat.
12
'Being good' is the basic challenge for human life and all of us trying to reach that state consciously or unconsciously. Only two practices is recommended by Eastern thought that can take a person to that state - discrimination and non-attachment. Discrimination is to understand the difference between real and unreal, truth and false , knowledge and ignorance at every point in life. And non-attachment is to become free from material and intelectual desire, free oneself from chasing name and fame and become fearless. This is a difficult path - as Somerset Moughm said walking on rezer edge. Once a person can do that and reach this state of personhood, he can deal this world vigorously and become the lighthouse for many - we feel elevated in presence of them.
The difficulty of a rational and scientific society - how we can keep the positive effects of material success and still reach that state - we get confused and accept a piece of rock as diamond and chase a wrong path.
The difficulty of a rational and scientific society - how we can keep the positive effects of material success and still reach that state - we get confused and accept a piece of rock as diamond and chase a wrong path.
6
What a lovely piece. But I should probably learn to skip reading the comments afterwards. I'm discouraged by the number of readers that think that this column should be interpreted through a Republican vs. Democrat lens. (Maybe it's easier to appreciate David Brooks if you don't live in the United States.)
19
What is a good person? Does goodness lead to true happiness? Is this synonymous with "enlightenment"?
My belief is that we live in an age in which there is a crisis with respect to definition of "goodness" and that this crisis will only increase. Over history we have seen something of this progression: Generally few people step forward as good, courageous, etc. and this goodness is usually defined by people by actions such as "helping the poor" (the list of good things, ways to be) and the good people, those who follow the path arrive at a deep satisfaction with life, happiness, even though often missing the lesser values such as money, status, power, etc. and the entirety of this progression is often equated with "enlightenment".
The problem in our age of overpopulation, environmental degradation, etc. is that no route at all can be taken for granted as good let alone a person find deep satisfaction in choices made--that is, if a person is honest. As for enlightenment--well, perhaps that still exists. Is it good to bring millions out of poverty? Can the planet handle that? Good to prevent sickness? I suppose I am bad for saying all this...My experience of being connected to the human race--feeling the whole in mindfulness sense--is to feel immense suffering and no obvious course of fixing suffering, no obvious "good" course, and certainly nothing of stable happiness. However in a certain sense I am enlightened--enlightened about a tragedy about which I can do little.
My belief is that we live in an age in which there is a crisis with respect to definition of "goodness" and that this crisis will only increase. Over history we have seen something of this progression: Generally few people step forward as good, courageous, etc. and this goodness is usually defined by people by actions such as "helping the poor" (the list of good things, ways to be) and the good people, those who follow the path arrive at a deep satisfaction with life, happiness, even though often missing the lesser values such as money, status, power, etc. and the entirety of this progression is often equated with "enlightenment".
The problem in our age of overpopulation, environmental degradation, etc. is that no route at all can be taken for granted as good let alone a person find deep satisfaction in choices made--that is, if a person is honest. As for enlightenment--well, perhaps that still exists. Is it good to bring millions out of poverty? Can the planet handle that? Good to prevent sickness? I suppose I am bad for saying all this...My experience of being connected to the human race--feeling the whole in mindfulness sense--is to feel immense suffering and no obvious course of fixing suffering, no obvious "good" course, and certainly nothing of stable happiness. However in a certain sense I am enlightened--enlightened about a tragedy about which I can do little.
3
A country that allows school employees who cheated on tests to be sentenced to 35 years in prison while the bankers who bankrupted tens of thousands of our fellow Americans were never even indicted for their criminal behavior is morally bankrupt...no matter how you define morality. Mr. Brooks, if you want to be eulogized as moral you will need to stop defending the economic status quo and start advocating for the rights of working people.
85
Mr. Brooks conflates supererogatory behavior with moral behavior.
Although some religions do this - there is no reason to believe that they are the same thing - although both can be laudable.
One can be very moral - indeed it is probably more sustainable for most folks to be moral without the requirement to go beyond.
Although some religions do this - there is no reason to believe that they are the same thing - although both can be laudable.
One can be very moral - indeed it is probably more sustainable for most folks to be moral without the requirement to go beyond.
1
At least you are looking in the right direction.
At this crucial, strategic moment in our world, we are unable to understand why? What is good or moral? Why do you offer up moral idealism in a world that so lacks the shared ideals that can motivate us to find this commitment, humility, love, selflessness and conscience that you so long for? Politics and Religions don't do it. Christianity is inadequate to the task. Our history of and present dedication to religious hatred and bloodletting so obviously shows us a yawning cliff edge. The evolution of our morals- from being based on Christ, Mohamed, Yahweh or whatever- to a new understanding that sees pure shared human wellbeing as the source and conscience- as our ultimate evolution- is all we have left, if we have yet time enough to mature to that final understanding.
At this crucial, strategic moment in our world, we are unable to understand why? What is good or moral? Why do you offer up moral idealism in a world that so lacks the shared ideals that can motivate us to find this commitment, humility, love, selflessness and conscience that you so long for? Politics and Religions don't do it. Christianity is inadequate to the task. Our history of and present dedication to religious hatred and bloodletting so obviously shows us a yawning cliff edge. The evolution of our morals- from being based on Christ, Mohamed, Yahweh or whatever- to a new understanding that sees pure shared human wellbeing as the source and conscience- as our ultimate evolution- is all we have left, if we have yet time enough to mature to that final understanding.
3
Erikson described a task of late adulthood as the development of Generativity, a sense of hopefulness and helpfulness to guide and smooth the way for the next generation, a commitment of "giving back". Your column seems to represent an admirable shift toward others. Its mystifying to me how someone who has such deeply held conservative values can also be capable of this kind of insight, because our planet has been sorely in need of some Governmental Generativity for a while, and your voice has been somewhat contradictory on this score. Redemption awaits, and change is possible.
6
What a wonderful, thoughtful essay by one of our greatest minds. How very sad, then, to read through the responding comments and see how how many miss the point. Just rip up your list of people, parties whatever that you spend so much time and energy hating, and try to be a better person. Like roadrage, give up your "life rage" and help just one other person--someone other than yourself.
7
I didn't forge my character worrying about whether I'm capable of deep love.
I forged my character being uninsured because of a pre-existing condition and struggling with illness. Then enduring bankruptcy. Then homelessness. Then contempt when I used my food stamps.
I don't know what planet you live on with these concerns, sir. I lived in homeless shelters and met fine, loving, God-fearing people suffering there. These were the people society brands its dregs and some of them were better than me and I admired their decency. They weren't lit from within or ennobled by their suffering. Their lives were frightening and exhausting.
Mr. Brooks, I believe you put this focus on the nobility of suffering/feeling deeply because it makes it easier to feel okay when you see people suffering great material privation. You convince yourself that suffering puts them on a fast track to goodness since they aren't sitting around thinking about trivial matters like whether they kid will get into Princeton.
I don't care for you homilies about deepening yourself and experiencing great love. I heard the same stuff from Mitt Romney's mouth - when he wasn't saying privately that half of the good people of this country are moochers and takers.
There's no spiritual beauty in being homeless, exhausted or hungry. Stop listening to Paul Ryan - he doesn't know. And for sure there's no spiritual beauty in believing that living in pain and squalor ennobles people. Jesus wept, sir.
I forged my character being uninsured because of a pre-existing condition and struggling with illness. Then enduring bankruptcy. Then homelessness. Then contempt when I used my food stamps.
I don't know what planet you live on with these concerns, sir. I lived in homeless shelters and met fine, loving, God-fearing people suffering there. These were the people society brands its dregs and some of them were better than me and I admired their decency. They weren't lit from within or ennobled by their suffering. Their lives were frightening and exhausting.
Mr. Brooks, I believe you put this focus on the nobility of suffering/feeling deeply because it makes it easier to feel okay when you see people suffering great material privation. You convince yourself that suffering puts them on a fast track to goodness since they aren't sitting around thinking about trivial matters like whether they kid will get into Princeton.
I don't care for you homilies about deepening yourself and experiencing great love. I heard the same stuff from Mitt Romney's mouth - when he wasn't saying privately that half of the good people of this country are moochers and takers.
There's no spiritual beauty in being homeless, exhausted or hungry. Stop listening to Paul Ryan - he doesn't know. And for sure there's no spiritual beauty in believing that living in pain and squalor ennobles people. Jesus wept, sir.
46
Nonetheless, the reality is more similar to what Francis Fukuyama wrote in "The End of History" (1989):
"The end of history will be a very sad time. The struggle for recognition, the willingness to risk one's life for a purely abstract goal, the worldwide ideological struggle that called forth daring, courage, imagination, and idealism, will be replaced by economic calculation, the endless solving of technical problems, environmental concerns, and the satisfaction of sophisticated consumer demands. In the post-historical period there will be neither art nor philosophy, just the perpetual care taking of the museum of human history..."
"The end of history will be a very sad time. The struggle for recognition, the willingness to risk one's life for a purely abstract goal, the worldwide ideological struggle that called forth daring, courage, imagination, and idealism, will be replaced by economic calculation, the endless solving of technical problems, environmental concerns, and the satisfaction of sophisticated consumer demands. In the post-historical period there will be neither art nor philosophy, just the perpetual care taking of the museum of human history..."
3
David--excellent essay. Now your task is to suggest policies that reflect the tolerance and compassion suggested by the experiences of the people you cited as examples. Tell us how to change the direction of American corporate capitalism so the Perkins and Days are the multitude.
14
These are some wonderful words to live by, David. Recently, I came across similar powerful words from a millenia ago, and I thought you and the Times's readers might appreciate them:
"Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.
O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console,
To be understood as to understand,
To be loved as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life."
(Source: http://www.easwaran.org/the-prayer-of-st-francis.html)
This a translation of St. Francis' prayer by Eknath Easwaran, one of those people, as you say, who radiated an inner light, and similar to one we want to be.
"Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.
O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console,
To be understood as to understand,
To be loved as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life."
(Source: http://www.easwaran.org/the-prayer-of-st-francis.html)
This a translation of St. Francis' prayer by Eknath Easwaran, one of those people, as you say, who radiated an inner light, and similar to one we want to be.
14
A recent study suggests that the most deeply held prejudices in the US are not racial or religious, but rather political. People are more frightened of Democrats (or Republicans) than of other groups. Stereotyping is part and parcel of these prejudices. David Brooks is a Republican. This does not mean he identifies with all topics on the agendas of all stripes of Republicans. I am a lifelong Democrat, but there are plenty of things about my party's agenda that I am not too happy about. So, dismissing David's column by saying that it is written by someone who lives in a political party with dismal views on various topics is a non-thinking response.
So let us have more substantive discussion. How many truly good people can society afford? Is the intense energy and commitment required for the creative process inconsistent with the moral stumbling described in the column?
This is one of the best columns I have read this year, by anyone. Do not trivialize it by ad hominem arguments.
So let us have more substantive discussion. How many truly good people can society afford? Is the intense energy and commitment required for the creative process inconsistent with the moral stumbling described in the column?
This is one of the best columns I have read this year, by anyone. Do not trivialize it by ad hominem arguments.
13
Great article, especially at times when human success ,acceptance and respect is measured by money and fame, not how they got there or how they achieved their goals, as long as they can show it, this is what matters. we have a huge moral gap in our culture, maybe more than ever. I wish every one would read and discuss this article.
I'm a grandchild of Armenian genocide survivor, I grew up with all their stories of sacrifice, hardship, faith, and moral strength, millions lost their lives for their moral believes, and yet almost 100 years later it is still not recognized as a genocide in US and some other countries, but today we are getting global attention, not because of the lost heroes, instead because of a famous reality show star, who is famous for everyone knows why!!! because she is half Armenians and is visiting her ancestorial home, at one hand it is good millions of her followers are getting to know Armenia, on the other hand by someone that if any of those survivors were alive today, I know what names they would be calling her, just lets say it would not be in the moral and kind or being proud category, but this is the stark reality of today,and many will argue with me, that I'm old fashioned and out of line, since she is famous, beautiful and rich, everything else should be ignored.
well then what are we teaching to our kids and the future generations. thanks again for opening this important and often forgotten dialogue.
I'm a grandchild of Armenian genocide survivor, I grew up with all their stories of sacrifice, hardship, faith, and moral strength, millions lost their lives for their moral believes, and yet almost 100 years later it is still not recognized as a genocide in US and some other countries, but today we are getting global attention, not because of the lost heroes, instead because of a famous reality show star, who is famous for everyone knows why!!! because she is half Armenians and is visiting her ancestorial home, at one hand it is good millions of her followers are getting to know Armenia, on the other hand by someone that if any of those survivors were alive today, I know what names they would be calling her, just lets say it would not be in the moral and kind or being proud category, but this is the stark reality of today,and many will argue with me, that I'm old fashioned and out of line, since she is famous, beautiful and rich, everything else should be ignored.
well then what are we teaching to our kids and the future generations. thanks again for opening this important and often forgotten dialogue.
2
Thank you for sharing this rich template of self enhancement. It has the capability for people to develop unlimited potential in becoming more gracious and generous throughout their lives.
The wonderful examples given really do put things in perfect perspective because each one made a conscious effort and decision to make changes within their own lives which consequently benefited others greatly.
Merely being content with my lot in life often times leaves me feeling empty, milling about aimlessly with no real sense of fulfillment or joy or purpose This article was like a slap across my face, waking me to what really should matter in life. At the end of each day, I should be questioning how I could be a better person to myself and others. This kind of self-reflection is essential and necessary in attaining inner happiness, love and sustainability of the soul.
The wonderful examples given really do put things in perfect perspective because each one made a conscious effort and decision to make changes within their own lives which consequently benefited others greatly.
Merely being content with my lot in life often times leaves me feeling empty, milling about aimlessly with no real sense of fulfillment or joy or purpose This article was like a slap across my face, waking me to what really should matter in life. At the end of each day, I should be questioning how I could be a better person to myself and others. This kind of self-reflection is essential and necessary in attaining inner happiness, love and sustainability of the soul.
53
Mr. Brooks is setting new landmarks for cognitive dissonances.
But then: we have been told by prominent Republicans that they are eligible to set their own reality.
Who winders?
But then: we have been told by prominent Republicans that they are eligible to set their own reality.
Who winders?
2
A beautiful and uplifting piece. THANK YOU David. I was a bit surprised by all the "sour grapes" of the comments. Upon closer reading of these comments, I heard much competitiveness and resentment. I once heard a rabbi say that his job included comforting the afflicted and afflicting the comfortable. GO DAVID!
7
The well-intentioned but poorly-informed have a champion in Brooks. "Amen," I hear the legion whisper collectively, sip their last drop of coffee, then head out to bungle the world again anew.
4
Brooks has gotten more interesting, more relevant as he has strayed further and further from politics. His introspection provides ample food for thought, agreement not necessary.
Many commenters will again yell at him for not denouncing the Republican Party in this column, or some variation of such. In doing so they are cheating themselves. Most certainly one can criticize things Brooks has written, said, and done. However, if one gives in to the easy, intellectually lazy, Manichean impulse and simply ignores the substance of what Brooks is currently writing, then one is the real loser, waylaid by one's own doing you-know-what into the wind.
To waste one's energy reading Brooks just to chastise him seems an incredible waste of one's time and energy. I, for one, largely ignore those whose writings do not engender respect from me. However, I suppose those who are prone to do you-know-what into the wind are also likely to do you-know-what on a hydrant, trying to stake out turf, oblivious to the indifference of all but those others crowding around the same hydrant.
One line alone in this piece makes it worthwhile, even if you look no farther:
"It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues."
Many commenters will again yell at him for not denouncing the Republican Party in this column, or some variation of such. In doing so they are cheating themselves. Most certainly one can criticize things Brooks has written, said, and done. However, if one gives in to the easy, intellectually lazy, Manichean impulse and simply ignores the substance of what Brooks is currently writing, then one is the real loser, waylaid by one's own doing you-know-what into the wind.
To waste one's energy reading Brooks just to chastise him seems an incredible waste of one's time and energy. I, for one, largely ignore those whose writings do not engender respect from me. However, I suppose those who are prone to do you-know-what into the wind are also likely to do you-know-what on a hydrant, trying to stake out turf, oblivious to the indifference of all but those others crowding around the same hydrant.
One line alone in this piece makes it worthwhile, even if you look no farther:
"It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues."
9
"wonderful people are made, not born"
Plato/Socrates asked "Why are the children of the virtuous sometimes not so? Can virtue be taught? Is it a by nature (vs "second nature")? Or a gift from the gods?
Homer, Calvin and Martin Luther took the "gift" line--following Paul's "divine grace"--perhaps a reward for faith--making irrational dogmatic belief the root "gift."
The James advocated "salvation by good works "(vs faith alone). But the question remains--"Whence the will/drive for good works?"
Socrates argued paradoxically that virtue (in general) could and could not be taught: "Could"--in principle--it is knowledge; but "could not"--in practice--none have the knowledge and will to teach it.
Plato and Aristotle distinguished know-how from "know-truths" and their variations on education--teaching principles vs skills--requiring practice--habituation. Plato's "Politeia" outlined an education system for teaching both. But also recognizing that "nature" plays a part too--in effect genetically based virtues/talents/abilities--making "second nature" easier for some and allowing them to go farther.
The Calvinism-Capitalism ties were outlined by Tawney--the rich are deserving due to a god's selection--not due to tax law.
Nonsense. But the "making of wonderful people" is not a matter of self creation either. That Sartrean "individualism" makes school systems irrelevant--punting virtue back to the gods and their dealers. We now know what damage that does.
Plato/Socrates asked "Why are the children of the virtuous sometimes not so? Can virtue be taught? Is it a by nature (vs "second nature")? Or a gift from the gods?
Homer, Calvin and Martin Luther took the "gift" line--following Paul's "divine grace"--perhaps a reward for faith--making irrational dogmatic belief the root "gift."
The James advocated "salvation by good works "(vs faith alone). But the question remains--"Whence the will/drive for good works?"
Socrates argued paradoxically that virtue (in general) could and could not be taught: "Could"--in principle--it is knowledge; but "could not"--in practice--none have the knowledge and will to teach it.
Plato and Aristotle distinguished know-how from "know-truths" and their variations on education--teaching principles vs skills--requiring practice--habituation. Plato's "Politeia" outlined an education system for teaching both. But also recognizing that "nature" plays a part too--in effect genetically based virtues/talents/abilities--making "second nature" easier for some and allowing them to go farther.
The Calvinism-Capitalism ties were outlined by Tawney--the rich are deserving due to a god's selection--not due to tax law.
Nonsense. But the "making of wonderful people" is not a matter of self creation either. That Sartrean "individualism" makes school systems irrelevant--punting virtue back to the gods and their dealers. We now know what damage that does.
2
A thoughtful and moving essay. Brooks' image of a moral life as a kind of adventure or even battle against oneself, invoked an older image - from the Mahabharata - of Arjuna standing paralyzed before a difficult task. Commentaries on this episode of the myth have suggested several distinct pathways out of such moral paralyses - often translated as the path of devotion (to someone/something greater than the self), the path of knowledge (to extinguish the ignorance that produces the problem) or the path of action (doing what needs to be done for the problem). This is a simple account of those threads, but there are echoes in Brooks' essay of a very old conversation that needs to continue. Gurcharan Das ('The Difficulty of Being Good', 2009) added a novel idea to the traditional rendering above. He asked: what would have been said before the great battle if Siddhartha (post-enlightenment) and not Krishna were Arjuna's charioteer? One implication was that the Buddhist prescription - of a combination of deep knowledge of our predicament in the world (panna) and compassion for the suffering of others (karuna) - might have resulted in a different course than the genocidal war that followed. I cannot imagine what that course might have been - after all, assertive diplomacy had been tried, and the cruel Kauravas could not be left to rule - but I daily appreciate the costs of this failure of imagination (on my part) in the smaller and less outwardly bloody battles of daily life.
5
"But people on the road to character understand that no person can achieve self-mastery on his or her own." – David Brooks
Additional point: I also recall being Hillary Clinton attacked and ridiculed by all those "self-made" conservatives for her "It takes a village (to raise a child)" speeches. Perhaps those conservatives never traveled on the "road to character" which Mr. Brooks so eloquently describes?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It_Takes_a_Village
Additional point: I also recall being Hillary Clinton attacked and ridiculed by all those "self-made" conservatives for her "It takes a village (to raise a child)" speeches. Perhaps those conservatives never traveled on the "road to character" which Mr. Brooks so eloquently describes?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It_Takes_a_Village
5
Goodness to me is about having a realistic idea about oneself. To consider yourself a 'pundit' is not a good start.....a journalist, however excellent, can only ever be seeking the truth, not proclaiming it. A sense of realism also comes from the humility of not considering oneself superior to others because of one's station in life. There is absolutely nothing, for example, that makes a journalist (or a banker, or a professor) intrinsically better than a garbage collector or burger flipper....and to think otherwise is to be seduced by a dangerous fantasy. A deeper sense of realism emerges from the identification of oneself as the eternal, universal and unchanging spirit....as opposed to the ego, which is only a fragile mental construct. There can be no real peace without the ability to forgive....others, to be sure, but also oneself. Then there is the ability to be satisfied with what one has, and to seek out joy and aesthetic appreciation in the humdrum events of daily life; the alternative is to become utterly mundane. But perhaps the most essential element of virtue (and from that, happiness) is the restoring of childlike innocence, which is so easily corrupted and contorted in this often harsh and brutal world.
4
Applying the Golden Rule of treating people the way you would like to be treated is very enabling in ones pursuit of a virtuous existence. Keeping this at the forefront of ones thoughts is difficult at best in our culture where our definition of success focuses on what you have with little value given to how you got there.
People who fight the good fight, so to say, in their pursuit of a valued existence are the ones who are not typically found in the main stream of our culture, they live more on the sidelines than in the limelight. Perhaps it is time for those of us who value integrity over possessions to be more vocal in the face of the reality of our main stream culture that has run afoul of traditional values.
People who fight the good fight, so to say, in their pursuit of a valued existence are the ones who are not typically found in the main stream of our culture, they live more on the sidelines than in the limelight. Perhaps it is time for those of us who value integrity over possessions to be more vocal in the face of the reality of our main stream culture that has run afoul of traditional values.
2
Might I suggest that Mr. Brooks consider create a Rhetorical Device Bucket List for his future columns so that he might expand beyond the tiring and repetitive "this or that" dichotomies he so often uses? The world is rarely as rigid or as black and white as the false frameworks he creates.
4
Perhaps we need to be telling young people that not only is it important for their own self-interest to "follow their bliss" as the saying goes, to identify what it is that they are drawn to and go for it - but it is important for society at large. Self-actualized people , people who are doing what they are doing because it is in harmony with their nature, are people who generally speaking, will contribute to society and mature as individuals; they will be able to endure the inevitable struggles that will shape and strengthen their moral backbone. Whether the contribution is concrete or abstract., whether it is a vocation or an avocation, society is nourished by people who are energized and fulfilled. "Imagine what a harmonious world it could be if every single person, both young and old, shared a little of what he is good at doing." Quincy Jones.
2
It is a relief today, from a kind of oppression thrust so often by columnists who delve into the problems of a nation, to see Mr. Brooks' concern for matters beyond the circumscription of things by simply our human condition ...
And such a circumscription such as prescribed by the preponderating 'leaders' in industry & government.
That there is anything to ponder, anything that can really amaze us, seems lost upon a generation so self-consumed in the matters of economics and simply 'making a living'.
We need to aspire to a higher consciousness ... more than ever in our present condition, in so secularized a society .
Because it is not mentally-healthy to have lost so much of inner mental or spiritual resources with which to cope with anything society, journalists, and politicians thrust upon us.
We become unwittingly, prey to being used for purposes which work against us, against our actual best interests. In other words, too easily led, so falsely led, into what they so often want us to think is what counts, a material 'well-being' exactly such as those in power: in government, in media, in the business world, want us to subscribe to. So they keep thrusting it upon us, and leading us inexorably, to 'believe in', which really amounts to a false idolatry. So fewer people can adhere to any really non hypocritical way of thinking or believing.
And such a circumscription such as prescribed by the preponderating 'leaders' in industry & government.
That there is anything to ponder, anything that can really amaze us, seems lost upon a generation so self-consumed in the matters of economics and simply 'making a living'.
We need to aspire to a higher consciousness ... more than ever in our present condition, in so secularized a society .
Because it is not mentally-healthy to have lost so much of inner mental or spiritual resources with which to cope with anything society, journalists, and politicians thrust upon us.
We become unwittingly, prey to being used for purposes which work against us, against our actual best interests. In other words, too easily led, so falsely led, into what they so often want us to think is what counts, a material 'well-being' exactly such as those in power: in government, in media, in the business world, want us to subscribe to. So they keep thrusting it upon us, and leading us inexorably, to 'believe in', which really amounts to a false idolatry. So fewer people can adhere to any really non hypocritical way of thinking or believing.
4
I am reminded of Carl R. Rogers' interest in the quest for meaning. A book he wrote explores this issue: "On Becoming A Person."
A couple of quotes of his come to mind; not from that book, I think. One is, "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." and, "What I am is good enough if I would only be it openly."
A couple of quotes of his come to mind; not from that book, I think. One is, "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." and, "What I am is good enough if I would only be it openly."
12
A great article. I wish people would stop bashing David Brooks in a knee-jerk reaction. Yeah, I disagree with a lot of his politics. But it's articles like these that he's at his best. This article speaks of issues that are relevant to everyone.
6
There are many times I disagree with David Brooks but as I watch him interact with Mark Shields and have seen his reports, I have sensed a person I could like.
This may be the reason.
This may be the reason.
3
How do ideological posturing, political mudslinging and ad hominem attacks help this conversation?
2
I would add a paragraph -- no, maybe three or four paragraphs -- under the "gratefulness" attribute about life's many joyful times, including those of self-indulgence. Mr. Brooks is right about everything but, like nearly all treatises on morality, this one comes off more dour than sweet. I grew up surrounded by folks who "did the right thing," but who rarely had enough fun -- in my eyes, anyway.
1
This is a wonderful article, but I was struck by what is missing: the word "values". A person's values are probably the strongest motivator for action (after satisfying basic needs), and people will organize their actions around their values whether they realize it or not - hence the maxim "actions speak louder than words". But people do get confused by external pressures, or by what they think they should do.
A useful exercise for anyone who is feeling "lost" because their life isn't making sense is to find some quiet time to reflect on what their values are, true values, not what they wish their values were. Write them down and put them in order of importance. Then look for all the ways to align your actions with your values and stop doing those things that aren't in alignment. It is simple, but it's not easy. It will take time, but over time you will find that you are living a value-centered life that matches your own values.
A useful exercise for anyone who is feeling "lost" because their life isn't making sense is to find some quiet time to reflect on what their values are, true values, not what they wish their values were. Write them down and put them in order of importance. Then look for all the ways to align your actions with your values and stop doing those things that aren't in alignment. It is simple, but it's not easy. It will take time, but over time you will find that you are living a value-centered life that matches your own values.
5
I know I might be setting the bar is rather low, but "as long as you are not obviously hurting anybody and people seem to like you, you must be OK" sounds OK to me. We have an entire political class at home and abroad that would do very well to aspire to such a lofty level of moral achievement.
We're not even close.
We're not even close.
3
There is clearly a class of people, and they are not defined by political affilliation, that can benefit from David's remarks, and as it seems, the example he is setting on this 'moral quest.' But I have to say that the people David often defends will exploit this to no end, as has been the case more often than not. David's most recent efforts being directed at the religious freedom crowd who for nearly two thousand years exploited those they should have been serving, Yes, those possed of an over abundance of self centeredness which seems to have helped them achieve, could expand themselves by a sense of self-abnegation, in the service of something higher than personal victories. But for most of the rest of folks who are sacrificed in the service of actualizing the values and lifestyles of the few elites, this is hogwash. Their first step should be a denial of the larger worlds demands on them, and ask themselves: "Is this what I want?" Is this what is serving my needs?" "Am I really content with the bulk of the fruits of my labors being consumed by others?" Only then can they find an authentic path that serves others, while they serve themselves. There is a larger moral discourse that forms part of what David is suggesting here. But more often than not it has served the intersts of a few at the expense of most others.
2
Brooks has gotten more interesting, more relevant as he has strayed further and further from politics. His introspection provides ample food for thought, agreement of little relevance.
Many commenters will again yell at him for not denouncing the Republican Party in this column, or some variation of such. Actually, in doing so they are cheating themselves. Most certainly one can criticize things Brooks has written, said, and done. However, if one gives in to the easy, intellectually lazy, Manichean impulse and simply ignores the substance of what Brooks is currently writing, then one is the real loser, waylaid by one's own doing you-know-what into the wind.
One line alone in this piece makes it worthwhile, even if you look no farther: "It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues."
To waste one's energy reading Brooks just to chastise him seems an incredible waste of one's time and energy. I, for one, largely ignore those whose writings do not engender respect from me. However, I suppose those who are prone to do you-know-what into the wind are also likely to do you-know-what on a hydrant, trying to stake out turf, oblivious to the indifference of all but those others crowding around the same hydrant..
Many commenters will again yell at him for not denouncing the Republican Party in this column, or some variation of such. Actually, in doing so they are cheating themselves. Most certainly one can criticize things Brooks has written, said, and done. However, if one gives in to the easy, intellectually lazy, Manichean impulse and simply ignores the substance of what Brooks is currently writing, then one is the real loser, waylaid by one's own doing you-know-what into the wind.
One line alone in this piece makes it worthwhile, even if you look no farther: "It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues."
To waste one's energy reading Brooks just to chastise him seems an incredible waste of one's time and energy. I, for one, largely ignore those whose writings do not engender respect from me. However, I suppose those who are prone to do you-know-what into the wind are also likely to do you-know-what on a hydrant, trying to stake out turf, oblivious to the indifference of all but those others crowding around the same hydrant..
4
Brooks is right in his observation that "...our culture and our educational systems spend more time teaching the skills and strategies you need for career success than the qualities you need to radiate (an) inner light. Many of us are clearer on how to build an external career than on how to build inner character." Our culture is based on the capitalist premise that the acquisition of things will make us happy, that happiness comes from the outside and not the inside. Consequently the value of our schools is based on their ability to prepare students for careers that are financially rewarding and they rely on external reward mechanisms. If we wanted schools that focus on character development we would eliminate the ranking of students and schools based on test scores and emphasize collaboration over competition.
2
I just feel a disconnect between what is said here and some of the other columns defending the GOP.
Conservatism is well, most of us want to live under the framework of current society. Some others would like improvements that would sooner or later become mainstream. For example, minority rights became mainstream after a long struggle, and now it is part of what society should keep and 'conserve'.
But political parties are another thing, lacking the integrity to call themselves moral, specially the GOP. It seems to me racism, and bigotry are tolerated, and where the line "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" seems one of the principles of opposition. It also seems that ideas and policies that would benefit society as a whole are rejected by the GOP on the basis of party affiliation of the proposer rather than on its own merits. And despite Obama has not done much to recognize the opponent, specially at the beginning of the first term, the opposition to Obama seems more hidden racism than anything else, as if the elected leader of USA does not have one good policy idea.
Mr. Brooks, it seems hypocrite to me to write this article and at the same time defend a political party that seems amoral to me. Maybe if you did not have the cowardice to ignore the contradictions in the GOP and its disregard for truth and honor, I would believe you.
I am sorry Mr. Brooks, I really believe you are more moral than you appear, but your survival instinct I think have the upper hand.
Conservatism is well, most of us want to live under the framework of current society. Some others would like improvements that would sooner or later become mainstream. For example, minority rights became mainstream after a long struggle, and now it is part of what society should keep and 'conserve'.
But political parties are another thing, lacking the integrity to call themselves moral, specially the GOP. It seems to me racism, and bigotry are tolerated, and where the line "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" seems one of the principles of opposition. It also seems that ideas and policies that would benefit society as a whole are rejected by the GOP on the basis of party affiliation of the proposer rather than on its own merits. And despite Obama has not done much to recognize the opponent, specially at the beginning of the first term, the opposition to Obama seems more hidden racism than anything else, as if the elected leader of USA does not have one good policy idea.
Mr. Brooks, it seems hypocrite to me to write this article and at the same time defend a political party that seems amoral to me. Maybe if you did not have the cowardice to ignore the contradictions in the GOP and its disregard for truth and honor, I would believe you.
I am sorry Mr. Brooks, I really believe you are more moral than you appear, but your survival instinct I think have the upper hand.
3
Having spent my share of time and money on therapists and self-help books, meditation, medication, physical challenges, and career achievement, It seems to me that if you want to become a better person, one such as Mr brooks describes, there isn't a clearer path than working a 12-step program.
"Progress, not perfection" as they say. We are not saints.
"Progress, not perfection" as they say. We are not saints.
4
It is always humbling when I encounter these souls.
2
Mr. Brooks,
Perhaps among your most wonderful and meaningful essays. Thank you.
Perhaps among your most wonderful and meaningful essays. Thank you.
5
Mr. Brooks, there is a quite simple set of instructions for making oneself the kind of person you describe, one who radiates an "inner light." It is the Great Sermon on the Mount. As you exit the Republican Party (as you must if you are sincere), or are evicted from it because of columns like yours today, you might provide the Party with a copy of the Great Sermon. Seems few of them have heard of it.
1
(Sundays with Brooks?). David, maybe you are selling yourself short ---- this "generosity of spirit" and this "moral bucket list" -- maybe you are already there? Everyone is given gifts --- yours is to write on Tuesdays and Fridays and stir us up, and you are doing a good job! However, I am a little suspicious of your true leanings, especially if you admire the work of Frances Perkins? I think, you are caught in comparing yourself to those that serve and not everyone is a server -- someone has to cook. And, then, there are those that need to prepare, shop, and the list goes on.
1
Interesting examples. My jaw dropped when Brooks repudiated the individualist worldview as not sufficient for reaching our highest purpose. Is he about to make a "conscience leap" away from the GOP? He seems conflicted, and today's GOP gives him much to be conflicted about.
4
It seems to me being worried about what people will say about you at your funeral is a strange motivation for changing your life. Sounds kind of self-centered, Mr. Brooks.
2
I suppose we are now waiting for Mr. Brooks to put all of this spiritual info into action and renounce the simple-minded tropes and hazardous policies of his long-term rightwing paymasters. (I suspect we will wait a long, long time.)
Thank you for the beautiful and inspirational column, Mr. Brooks. Perfect for a Sunday morning, as spring arrives and we all think about what and who we should strive to be.
Kirstin Downey
Kirstin Downey
4
Based on the comments, I am sorrowful that people's preconceived notions of David Brooks have blinded them to the lessons contained in this article. If you are interested in being able to approach situations, thoughts, people more openly and without bias, I would suggest the following for further study - "Sacred Fire" by Ronald Rolheiser , "The Way of Love" by Anthony de Mello and/or "The Miracle of Mindfulness" by Thich Nhat Hanh.
Thank you David for this article. This is a hard way. My pray is that I and others grow in it day by day.
Thank you David for this article. This is a hard way. My pray is that I and others grow in it day by day.
1
Thank you for an insightful article and a great guide to becoming the person we all deeply want to be.
5
Mr. Brooks, this may be the most important column you've ever written...
7
"But people on the road to inner light do not find their vocations by asking, what do I want from life? They ask, what is life asking of me? How can I match my intrinsic talent with one of the world’s deep needs?" Life is asking of me at this minute that I write a note to Hillary Clinton who has a chance to match her intrinsic talent with the world's deep needs and beg her to add Elizabeth Warren to her ticket as running mate. You have some popularity but you need to add greater courage and idealism to your list of skills. Warren knows what life is asking of her. It is to protect democracy for the people of this country and, at least by our example, for the world. Together you could set our entire nation on the road to inner light. Together you could take up the banner of change and hope. Otherwise, the boys will outspend and outtalk you and a great opportunity for humanity will be lost.
5
so incredibly deep, gives me sinus pressure
1
And then there was Mother Theresa.
3
I really wish that all of us could read a non-political column and be inspired by it instead of using absolutely everything a columnist writes as a cudgel to beat him over the head because in other contexts he support a political viewpoint that is not ours. Can't we be better than all of this constant nit-picking? David Brooks wrote a great column and frankly we should all aspire to live the words he wrote today. I don't care if he is a Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, or the man in the moon. Can't we just all take his first point - be humble - to heart? No one is angrier at the Tea Party, conservative politics, etc., than I am. But, really, where is all this snarkiness getting us? Please, let's give one another a break.
3
David Brooks needs to reapproach the young liberal that he once was and question whether his rejection of liberalism was a product of wisdom or of impatience with imperfection. Liberalism is very much about stumbling on, acknowledging that collective solutions are difficult to achieve but that we need them to build a fabric of society where people (not only some) have room, economically and otherwise, to be moral beings.
Onesided individualism is turning the US into a country without mercy and one of the political parties only wants to accelerate that development. It's paradoxical that a person writing with insight about moral awakenings would support that party.
Onesided individualism is turning the US into a country without mercy and one of the political parties only wants to accelerate that development. It's paradoxical that a person writing with insight about moral awakenings would support that party.
4
"For most of their lives their inner and outer ambitions are strong and in balance."
It is the "balance" that we should strive to achieve as both an individual as well as part of the larger circles from our surrounding world(s) and beyond...
But that balance does not necessarily need to be of equal weight to keep the scale always parallel and level, but slight waves or a see-sawing motion would broaden our perspectives...
Should we plan for somewhat of the "worst" but strive 200 % more for the best or best possible outcome? Growing to know ourselves and planning with a touch of the art of "improvisation" and an understanding of faith as personally defined, is a recipe that can shine a light on those hum drum days...
It is the "balance" that we should strive to achieve as both an individual as well as part of the larger circles from our surrounding world(s) and beyond...
But that balance does not necessarily need to be of equal weight to keep the scale always parallel and level, but slight waves or a see-sawing motion would broaden our perspectives...
Should we plan for somewhat of the "worst" but strive 200 % more for the best or best possible outcome? Growing to know ourselves and planning with a touch of the art of "improvisation" and an understanding of faith as personally defined, is a recipe that can shine a light on those hum drum days...
I was reminded as I read this of hearing a young man speak last week at a gathering of American Red Cross volunteers (I'm not one, not yet anyway, I was a guest). He was an Army veteran of at least one tour in Afghanistan and had seen War. He said that when he returned home he saw his country with different eyes...a country of 'I' and 'Me.' He had a simple message: "I don't like what I see. I want a country of 'We.'"
Thank you, David, for a thoughtful essay.
Thank you, David, for a thoughtful essay.
4
An imagined Book Club...Gen Eisenhower, Dorthy Day, Francis Perkins and George Eliot have come together to discuss Ayn Rand's "Fountainhead". Would it be a glowing review?..Imagine.
6
Bravo, Mr. Brooks. Religious people have the Decalogue, the Beatitudes, the corporal works of mercy (feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, etc.) If anyone reading this is looking for a sound, secular path to virtue, pick up Aristotle's Nicomachean Ethics. It is the most beautiful explication of the moral life journey I've ever read.
5
The ultimate journey, the flight from self, is very difficult for most people to
take. The sphere of self (as exemplified in the selfie) makes such a leap
impossible.
Thank you for a beautiful article that holds the mirror up to humanity while
shining a light on our deficiencies.
take. The sphere of self (as exemplified in the selfie) makes such a leap
impossible.
Thank you for a beautiful article that holds the mirror up to humanity while
shining a light on our deficiencies.
3
Mr. Brooks's essay is sweet and inspiring in places, one supposes, but pales in comparison to the affective and practical valus of ts newsprint neighbor, the reflections of reporter John Burns and the drawing forth of the contents of his moral sachel. From these contents the imperative to fight ideology, and orthodoxies, is brought into focus and summons us to do battle. Brooks distills his ideas admirably, but in the end his hopes are cautious ministrations and run to the personal those losing the energy needed for cultural change. Burns, on the other hand, a journalist who has seen and smelled physical death and cultural destruction over and over, has the credentials (and, importantly, the literary skill) needed to provide a contemporary revelation of Armageddon, at once terrifying and universal rather than warm and pretty and individual.
1
"...our educational systems spend more time teaching the skills and strategies you need for career success..."
Yeah, well, if you let us teacher actually teach important life and person-hood skills instead of forcing us to prepare students for tests all the time, we might do otherwise.
Yeah, well, if you let us teacher actually teach important life and person-hood skills instead of forcing us to prepare students for tests all the time, we might do otherwise.
1
The lament of the hollow man who sees but does not understand.
5
This is a beautifully written piece, David. I cried, I laughed, and I became quite. It's just beautiful and a keeper.
5
Lovely and a thoughtful article. I hope it serves me.
3
This piece, and I suspect the book on which it is based, are the result of dissatisfaction with what would appear from the outside to be a wonderful life. The dissatisfaction results from a comparison of self with certain others. I have met just a few people with the " inner light" and I very much understand the desire to be more like them, to get some of that kind of light. However, I don't believe the essay gets to the core of what characterizes these people. Specifically, these rare people are all at peace with who they are and the journey they are on. High self awareness and the desire to be of service to the world are necessary for finding such peace, but I believe there is one more element, and it is something that Bill George writes about in True North. It's the well examined moral compass. To be at peace, we must be confident in our notions about what really matters and disciplined enough to keep that consideration in working memory. People with the inner light have a clear and honest vision of how the world can be better as a result of how they are living their lives. They actively design and redesign their live to stay true to that vision.
1
Eternal adolescence is a wonderful thing. To be pursued with earnest? I doubt not. Efficacy of mind trumps phony ideology of which you seem to be carrying around a boat load.
2
David, write Barney Frank's name down. Then before you tear it up, call him and apologize. Do the same for Nancy Pelosi and Dianne Feinstein. Going forward find a liberal do-gooder and publish something positive about their work. Stop worrying about what house and senate staffers think and focus on your readers.
5
When morality can exclude equality, feeding the hungry, caring for the sick, housing the homeless and instead use hunger and privation to "incentivize" the poor, deny education and healthcare to those without means, or use racial, gender, and sexual bias to exploit other it is not morality bu hypocrisy. When the perpetrators of cruelty and greed claim moral superiority some of us are fooled because our baser instincts or fears are evoked.
Much of Brooks column illustrates moral intent but the manner and actions all fail to deliver moral outcomes. Deception about a "moral" course that deprives and harms others is contemptible and must be recognized as trickery in service of vice.
Much of Brooks column illustrates moral intent but the manner and actions all fail to deliver moral outcomes. Deception about a "moral" course that deprives and harms others is contemptible and must be recognized as trickery in service of vice.
7
I don't agree with David's pronouncement on George Eliot's going off with a married man. Why didn't he get a divorce?
2
Thank you, Mr. Brooks, for an insightful column. It has given this poor soul, who votes regularly democratic, much to chew on.
1
My, the luxury of being able to work on the highest level of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, when most of us are just trying to get through the day to ensure that we can keep our jobs and take care of the basic needs of our families.
5
You are a wonderful writer if not always a great thinker. This beautiful essay I admire as writing. That's why I enjoy reading your column. There is truth in the essay, but you and I should humbly agree that we are blessed to have the ability and time to muse and compose our thoughts because our lives are not a daily struggle to survive.
Don't forget those less fortunate than we are, those for whom life is a frightening forest in which survival keeps them moving, but gives them no time for careful thought.
Don't forget those less fortunate than we are, those for whom life is a frightening forest in which survival keeps them moving, but gives them no time for careful thought.
5
"But people on the road to character understand that no person can achieve self-mastery on his or her own. " – David Brooks
So Mr. Brooks is acknowledging President Obama's point about collective contributions (". . .you didn't build that [on your own]")? As I recall, the President's point was widely ridiculed by all the "self-made" conservatives and that ridicule even became a Romney campaign meme.
What a difference a few years makes, I guess.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/You_didn%27t_build_that
So Mr. Brooks is acknowledging President Obama's point about collective contributions (". . .you didn't build that [on your own]")? As I recall, the President's point was widely ridiculed by all the "self-made" conservatives and that ridicule even became a Romney campaign meme.
What a difference a few years makes, I guess.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/You_didn%27t_build_that
1
I enjoyed Brooks's piece and am surprised by the anger in some of these comments. Sure, he's a pundit. Sure, he's a Republican. Does that necessarily relegate him to a de facto collection of descriptors? Isn't the point that one is not defined by job titles? And that socioeconomic standing doesn't determine which of us is entitled to search for meaning? It's dispiriting that he was trying to convey his own questioning and has been met with a reflexive outcry about politics and privilege. I laud not only his introspection but his courage in trying to share it.
4
Barack Obama has something of this inner light. Other than that, the only people whom I have met who truly have it are those who eschew worldy possessions, fame, and its trappings.
1
David, we pray for your soul. I suggest you take a year off from social science and the Republican Party, try the alternatives, and see if that doesn't help. Call us in the morning.
2
One of the joys of being whether you are a "stumbler " or a " high achiever ", is the recognition that your efforts and life are worthy. The great boost to a persons positive look on his or her life is simply any achievement no matter how small or large . Achievement is always relative . An artist whether great or unrecognised can be both, but the moment his efforts are appreciated they are equal in acheivement and content.
Nice Sunday sermon without any religious affiliation necessarily
Good job Brooks making us think more spiritually than materially
Good job Brooks making us think more spiritually than materially
2
We have a tendency to overanlyze stuff. I like Vaclav Havel's simple aphorism 'Live in the truth'. Do that and the transcendent moments will come - do it fully and it may even infuse one's whole life.
1
When Mr. Brooks writes an insightful, thoughtfully philosophical piece like this, why do readers feel a need to attack his politics? I mostly disagree with his politics, but Mr. Brooks has a lot to say about human nature, what makes us tick, and what makes for a fulfilling life. This is a courageous, open hearted piece. Back off people, there's more to life than politics.
7
It's somewhat ironic how unironically many here read will this piece and then immediatly reach the conclusion that Mr. Brook's morality would be greatly enhanced if he only thought exactly as they do. This is immediately followed by throwing out strawmen of anyone who would dare to follow a disperate political or philosophical path.
Be kind, be humble, be generous, but don't be a doormat.
Be kind, be humble, be generous, but don't be a doormat.
2
Oh my, Mr. Brooks! If Dorothy Day, Frances Perkins and Mary Ann Evans were alive today and as active in their causes, they would all be demonized across all fronts by the GOP!
357
A 'moral bucket list'? Perhaps we should try this: Imagine you're near the end of your days. Just what sort of life did you live? One that was for the most part on your terms, sharing what you chose to share with people you felt right sharing it with? Or did you live for the esteem of others who may or may not have even cared about you, even strangers? Just whose life was it, anyway? Did it belong to you, shared with your friends and family, or were you merely a tool used by others for their benefit, with no say over anything meaningful? What mattered the most - keeping up with the Joneses, or your own moral inner self?
"First to thine self be true, thou canst then be false to a man.", as Polonius advised Hamlet. For Polonius, political hack extraordinaire, that was ironic, but for the rest of us it shouldn't be. Unless we really want to live our lives as, well, political hacks (in the office, the family, the club, or wherever) extraordinaire.
"First to thine self be true, thou canst then be false to a man.", as Polonius advised Hamlet. For Polonius, political hack extraordinaire, that was ironic, but for the rest of us it shouldn't be. Unless we really want to live our lives as, well, political hacks (in the office, the family, the club, or wherever) extraordinaire.
You really did it this time, my friend. I felt, while reading this piece, that you talked about and made sense of a way of looking at one's life that is very difficult to explain, but is worth the effort. You put a lot in clear perspective for me that I feel and experience at this point in my life. I am now 72, but instead of feeling old and useless, I feel that I can be a role model by showing what things are worth paying attention to and what things are not so lasting in importance. One of the best things I do is spend time with my grand children, and like my grand parents before me, I learn from treating them as people; the people who will pick up the mantle of "treat others as you like to be treated." This "rule of life" is perhaps the most important single lesson and has always served me well. G-d bless us all!
3
15 months ago, via email, somebody told me that I should see a shrink. After 15 months of thinking about it, I am 100℅ sure that's it's not true, not at all, and the reason the person said it was because she is half nuts herself. Frankly, I want to write to her and insult her, and I could, but I have resisted the temptation. Oddly, as the months pass, I feel that I am becoming somebody better. And I think if more people in this world just stopped responding likewise to the insults they receive, the world would be a better place.
1
Unlike V from Los Angeles, I think I do understand David Brooks--and I agree with him here. As I see it, Principles matter.. Integrity matters... Character matters... We are all on a journey from the kind of people that we are today to the kind of people that we are becoming. Brooks is challenging us to take that journey on "The Road to Character"--it is a worthy objective.
Brooks describes two sets of virtues... "The résumé virtues are the skills you bring to the marketplace. The eulogy virtues are the ones that are talked about at your funeral." And Brooks says that as we go through life for many people "...a humiliating gap opens between your actual self and your desired self.."
If Brooks' approach to "character" doesn't work for you, consider how Washington Post sports columnist Thomas Boswell approached it when reflecting on baseball in the 1980s: "“There is no substitute for excellence--not even success. Success is tricky, perishable and often outside our control; the pursuit of success makes a poor cornerstone, especially for a whole personality. Excellence is dependable, lasting and largely an issue within our own control; pursuit of excellence, in and for itself, is the best of foundations... Desire for success and love of excellence coexist in all of us. The question is: Where does the balance lie? In a pinch, what guides us?"
Unfortunately, the drive for success dominates our politics today. For more, Matthew Dowd's piece http://abcn.ws/1z7s1oM
Brooks describes two sets of virtues... "The résumé virtues are the skills you bring to the marketplace. The eulogy virtues are the ones that are talked about at your funeral." And Brooks says that as we go through life for many people "...a humiliating gap opens between your actual self and your desired self.."
If Brooks' approach to "character" doesn't work for you, consider how Washington Post sports columnist Thomas Boswell approached it when reflecting on baseball in the 1980s: "“There is no substitute for excellence--not even success. Success is tricky, perishable and often outside our control; the pursuit of success makes a poor cornerstone, especially for a whole personality. Excellence is dependable, lasting and largely an issue within our own control; pursuit of excellence, in and for itself, is the best of foundations... Desire for success and love of excellence coexist in all of us. The question is: Where does the balance lie? In a pinch, what guides us?"
Unfortunately, the drive for success dominates our politics today. For more, Matthew Dowd's piece http://abcn.ws/1z7s1oM
Can one who is often merely a trumpeter for the Oligarchs suddenly become a
herald for justice, fairness, sharing, and compassion? So many years of work on behalf of grindingly unimaginative Conservative "solutions" for American problems (that always equate to lower taxes on the rich and women in chains)
make me very dubious of pious platitudes from Mr. Brooks today. Careful David you'll lose your key to the Heritage Club.
herald for justice, fairness, sharing, and compassion? So many years of work on behalf of grindingly unimaginative Conservative "solutions" for American problems (that always equate to lower taxes on the rich and women in chains)
make me very dubious of pious platitudes from Mr. Brooks today. Careful David you'll lose your key to the Heritage Club.
6
"Eulogy virtues"?
Mr. Brooks, you have not been paying attention at Jewish funerals. Eulogies tend to stretch one's virtues (or "virtues") beyond recognition and always have.
Perhaps better would be remembrance virtues, and even that is at different levels: how do your children remember you? rest of the family? friends and colleagues? Students or proteges? Even enemies? Often it does not even have to be true but can rather just be a perception. That too reflects success or failure.
As for the categories? One bucket list is as good as another.
Mr. Brooks, you have not been paying attention at Jewish funerals. Eulogies tend to stretch one's virtues (or "virtues") beyond recognition and always have.
Perhaps better would be remembrance virtues, and even that is at different levels: how do your children remember you? rest of the family? friends and colleagues? Students or proteges? Even enemies? Often it does not even have to be true but can rather just be a perception. That too reflects success or failure.
As for the categories? One bucket list is as good as another.
It's ironic to see a Republican pundit speak kindly of a champion of workers' rights these days. The "core moral weakness" of every currently prominent Republican, and especially the ones who are said to be running for President, is their lack of any commitment to better the lives of working people. For them, it's about stripping working people of any protections, any power, any security, and increasingly, any ability to move up the economic ladder, in order to allow the most privileged in society to accumulate more wealth and power. As Ted Kennedy famously asked Republicans, "When does the greed stop?"
254
David, your column today made me very sad. All the things you said are true, especially about Dorthy Day, of which I have read many of her writings. Why sad? Your column reminds me of all the things that are missing in the political life of this country, knowing generosity of spirit, and that depth of character are nowhere to be found in those running for the highest office. Perhaps these people should read C.S. Lewis' 'Surprised by Joy', it reinforces many of your thoughts.
8
You are looking for the fruits of the Spirit.
Galatians 5:22 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
Develop and deepen your relationship with Jesus Christ. He will send you the Spirit, and you will enjoy the fruit of the Spirit.
Galatians 5:22 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
Develop and deepen your relationship with Jesus Christ. He will send you the Spirit, and you will enjoy the fruit of the Spirit.
3
I love this line from the movie/play "Harvey: "'In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.' Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." Truer words were never spoken.
There is the face we give to others, and the face we give to ourselves. Sometimes, in some, they are the same, but for most of us they aren't. One of my favorite quotes is from C.S. Lewis, “True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.”
I try each day to follow this path, and each day I fail in some way. I will continue until my cup is empty.
I try each day to follow this path, and each day I fail in some way. I will continue until my cup is empty.
1
Reading this was painful. Mr. Brooks, you describe meeting people that exude a sort of inner light and express a wish to be more like them, but then only use examples of people that you have not met, and thus are projecting what you can't know.
This column rests on assumptions essentially bound to a repressed upper middle class sensibility. You can't develop virtues by listing them in bold print, and philosophizing raptly for a paragraph or two. Transcendence comes from being dealt a hand you didn't ask for, and emerging from the experience with your head held high. It comes from not accepting the stress others put on you, certainly not the expectations to achieve vaguely definable goals, such as "The Dependency Leap" or praying to hear some "Call Within The Call".
Life treats no person better or worse than they deserve; that places all the onus on "life" and very little responsibility on the person. If you're thinking of developing personal virtues as merely filling the bucket, you'll never be satisfied, never have achieved enough 'goodness.'
If, however, that is truly what you want to do, you should stop being a pundit trying to rationalize Republican ideals. It's forcing you into a perpetual dissonance.
This column rests on assumptions essentially bound to a repressed upper middle class sensibility. You can't develop virtues by listing them in bold print, and philosophizing raptly for a paragraph or two. Transcendence comes from being dealt a hand you didn't ask for, and emerging from the experience with your head held high. It comes from not accepting the stress others put on you, certainly not the expectations to achieve vaguely definable goals, such as "The Dependency Leap" or praying to hear some "Call Within The Call".
Life treats no person better or worse than they deserve; that places all the onus on "life" and very little responsibility on the person. If you're thinking of developing personal virtues as merely filling the bucket, you'll never be satisfied, never have achieved enough 'goodness.'
If, however, that is truly what you want to do, you should stop being a pundit trying to rationalize Republican ideals. It's forcing you into a perpetual dissonance.
1
Imagine my surprise to see a Brooksian offering on a Sunday, apparently in Douthat absentia. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth …
My initial reaction to David’s concern that he hasn’t in his life achieved the elevation in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs that others have is that self-actualization is an effort essayed at different intensities and paces by different people. My second reaction is that David’s life isn’t over yet.
And, entertainingly, David seeks to generalize the ability to seriously develop the “eulogy” virtues. If anything can be generalized convincingly, it’s the ability to develop the “résumé virtues”: we don’t admire people who succeed at developing depth in the “eulogy virtues” because a lot of people have, or even because we think that many CAN: we admire such people because their accomplishments are so rare. He’s certainly right that such people are “made” and not “born” to their achievements.
1500 characters (including spaces) is hardly sufficient to comment on all of David’s characteristics of a life well-lived; but I think they’re very good ones. I would say that Dorothy Day sounds a lot like I see myself to be: like St. Augustine, who said “give me chastity and give me constancy, but do not give it yet”.
That was fun. Thank you, David.
My initial reaction to David’s concern that he hasn’t in his life achieved the elevation in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs that others have is that self-actualization is an effort essayed at different intensities and paces by different people. My second reaction is that David’s life isn’t over yet.
And, entertainingly, David seeks to generalize the ability to seriously develop the “eulogy” virtues. If anything can be generalized convincingly, it’s the ability to develop the “résumé virtues”: we don’t admire people who succeed at developing depth in the “eulogy virtues” because a lot of people have, or even because we think that many CAN: we admire such people because their accomplishments are so rare. He’s certainly right that such people are “made” and not “born” to their achievements.
1500 characters (including spaces) is hardly sufficient to comment on all of David’s characteristics of a life well-lived; but I think they’re very good ones. I would say that Dorothy Day sounds a lot like I see myself to be: like St. Augustine, who said “give me chastity and give me constancy, but do not give it yet”.
That was fun. Thank you, David.
If Mr. Brooks faces himself and acknowledges that he does not have the generous spirit or moral character he wishes he had, then his seeking to become that better version of himself is only for the good.
I don't think everyone, or even a majority of people, were raised, educated, or motivated as Mr. Brooks suggests he has been. I think many people, in fact, live first to love others, to lend a hand to their fellows, and to cooperate, and many were raised to value integrity and humility, whether they were raised poor or affluent. Many consistently set such an example for the young people with whom they come in regular contact.
I see no harm in Mr. Brooks' looking at people around him in all walks of life who are better in meaningful ways than he has discovered himself to be and to try to become better himself.
Deeply good people don't think of the way they live as any kind of bucket list, though. They just live from the heart.
I don't think everyone, or even a majority of people, were raised, educated, or motivated as Mr. Brooks suggests he has been. I think many people, in fact, live first to love others, to lend a hand to their fellows, and to cooperate, and many were raised to value integrity and humility, whether they were raised poor or affluent. Many consistently set such an example for the young people with whom they come in regular contact.
I see no harm in Mr. Brooks' looking at people around him in all walks of life who are better in meaningful ways than he has discovered himself to be and to try to become better himself.
Deeply good people don't think of the way they live as any kind of bucket list, though. They just live from the heart.
1
I recognized myself in this essay. But I am not the "person who radiates an inner light." I am the person who has lived for achievement, and now find myself, at a rather advanced age, "separated from the deepest meaning of life", as I have begun to notice in the last few years. I have strongly experienced "the humiliating gap" between what I want to be and what I actually am. When you are young, active, working, it is easy to fool yourself. When you are old and less is going on--not so much.
A related thought: I recently saw a film titled "The Dhamma Brothers", about the introduction of a Vipassana meditation program in a maximum security prison in Alabama. It is hard to think of a setting where participants have more genuine cause for regret, or fewer resources to improve their lives than a maximum security prison. Most of the men were serving life or LWOP. It was most impressive to see the growth of moral consciousness in some of these men.
Some will say their changes are superficial, but how would another person know? In that last paragraph,David writes that we don't build our lives "by being better than others", but by being better than we were. We can only know that about ourselves, not for others.
A related thought: I recently saw a film titled "The Dhamma Brothers", about the introduction of a Vipassana meditation program in a maximum security prison in Alabama. It is hard to think of a setting where participants have more genuine cause for regret, or fewer resources to improve their lives than a maximum security prison. Most of the men were serving life or LWOP. It was most impressive to see the growth of moral consciousness in some of these men.
Some will say their changes are superficial, but how would another person know? In that last paragraph,David writes that we don't build our lives "by being better than others", but by being better than we were. We can only know that about ourselves, not for others.
6
"But our culture and our educational systems spend more time teaching the skills and strategies you need for career success than the qualities you need to radiate that sort of inner light. "
Actually, the mission of places of higher education was precisely to nurture the best of the human spirit in each of us. All those 'useless and indulgent' courses - poetry, literature, philosophy, history, criticism - were valuable tools in this. This was before political expediency and short-sightedness decided to turn colleges and universities into 'economic powerhouses' or 'skills-training hubs' - much as the author has advocated himself.
This paean to the true education of a person is lovely. But it is too late, because we collectively (including the author) put a price tag on our souls, and then held a flash sale.
Actually, the mission of places of higher education was precisely to nurture the best of the human spirit in each of us. All those 'useless and indulgent' courses - poetry, literature, philosophy, history, criticism - were valuable tools in this. This was before political expediency and short-sightedness decided to turn colleges and universities into 'economic powerhouses' or 'skills-training hubs' - much as the author has advocated himself.
This paean to the true education of a person is lovely. But it is too late, because we collectively (including the author) put a price tag on our souls, and then held a flash sale.
1
What an amazing essay. I just read this piece twice and I have to say, I feel as though Mr. Brooks was describing me to a T. I have struggled quite a bit in my life, going down a dark path that wasn't who I was. But I pulled myself out of it, put myself through college for a second time and am not graduating with honors and going onto graduate school in NYC to get my master's in International Affairs to do work in human rights in some of the most conflicted and poorest nations in the world, to help the most vulnerable populations. It actually scared me how much this piece spoke to me. Now I have to buy his book. Thank you, Mr. Brooks.
1
I probably haven't agreed with a word Mr. Brooks has written in years, but this column made me pensive. For me it sums up the dichotomous human condition of doing right for the wrong reasons as well as doing wrong for the right reasons. I hope a few members of Congress read and think about this essay. Names withheld to protect the guilty.
3
I always read your columns, Mr. Brooks, and for years have watched you on PBS news. I have long appreciated the ways you make me think. In the last year or so, I've noticed a shift in your NYT columns, away from politics, policy and cultural issues to the inner self. Because I am about the same age as you are, I think this stage of life -- seeded as it is with the things that resonated when we were adolescents -- finds us more attuned to the inner self.
You, along with the other incredible op-ed writers/thinkers in this newspaper, teach me so much, help me to deal with the realities of the world right now, and keep me focused on what matters. Thank you.
You, along with the other incredible op-ed writers/thinkers in this newspaper, teach me so much, help me to deal with the realities of the world right now, and keep me focused on what matters. Thank you.
2
I am in awe of this beautifully written, deeply emotional, heart-felt and mind-challenging (I can truly say) piece of literature! I am so happy I woke up to read something that inspires a spiritual journey into morality rather than the usual stories of self pity, "society hates us" and the world is against me. I am going to recommend it to everyone I can!
2
Our true nature is peace and love, the unconditional non judgmental kind. Each and every one of us. We are meant to peel off our layers of negative emotions, underneath which is an everlasting happiness and peace of an indestructible kind. Wouldn't it be nice if we taught kindergarteners to discover who am I. To understand that the false self, the small me, is not worth embellishing and inflating.
1
So wonderfully put. I've been trying to put into words these two types of "success" for so long now, and here you've done a beautiful job describing them, and giving the one that matters most, the most attention. Of course it is this moral list that proves most challenging for me. My flow through life matches this arc you put out there so well.
I recently had the good fortune of finding financial independence and quite literally woke up one day trying to understand how I could have been so successful in one area, while quite possibly a complete failure on the moral front. I'm only a year into the journey of trying to understand this, and your column is a fantastic distillation of how to consider this stuff. Thank you.
I have found one of the biggest joys in life to be catching the spark of a stumbler out of the corner of my eye. I reach for it, and sometimes catch it, but it often feels like grabbing at smoke; it's there, but I can't touch it.
I recently had the good fortune of finding financial independence and quite literally woke up one day trying to understand how I could have been so successful in one area, while quite possibly a complete failure on the moral front. I'm only a year into the journey of trying to understand this, and your column is a fantastic distillation of how to consider this stuff. Thank you.
I have found one of the biggest joys in life to be catching the spark of a stumbler out of the corner of my eye. I reach for it, and sometimes catch it, but it often feels like grabbing at smoke; it's there, but I can't touch it.
2
Thank you, David Brooks!
1
I think I would have to read the entire book from which this essay was adapted to know if I agree or not. It all sounds like something a Catholic would have been taught, not necessarily something original, but I would not know because I am not a Catholic myself. The sentence that absolutely confirmed this for me was "There’s joy in freely chosen obedience to organizations, ideas and people." Yes, that's what the Catholic church wants you to think. If you yield the very capacity that makes you human - the capacity of reason - then you will become a better person, they say. On the other hand Buddhism is all about introspection and using your faculties to become a better person. So I cannot sing praise to Brooks like some others here based on just this essay.
2
Brooks has gotten more interesting and more relevant, as he has strayed further and further from politics. His introspection provides ample food for thought, one's agreement with all his observations not necessary.
Many commenters will again yell at him for not denouncing the Republican Party in this column, or some variation of such. In doing so they are cheating themselves. Most certainly one can criticize things Brooks has written, said, and done. However, if one gives in to the easy, intellectually lazy, Manichean impulse and simply ignores the substance of what Brooks is currently writing, then that person is the real loser, waylaid by one's own doing you-know-what into the wind.
To spend one's energy reading Brooks just to chastise him seems an incredible waste of one's time and energy. I, for one, largely ignore those whose writings do not engender respect from me. However, I suppose those who are prone to do you-know-what into the wind are also likely to do you-know-what on a hydrant, trying to stake out turf, oblivious to the indifference of all but those others crowding around the same hydrant.
One line alone in this piece makes it worthwhile, even if you look no farther:
"It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues."
Many commenters will again yell at him for not denouncing the Republican Party in this column, or some variation of such. In doing so they are cheating themselves. Most certainly one can criticize things Brooks has written, said, and done. However, if one gives in to the easy, intellectually lazy, Manichean impulse and simply ignores the substance of what Brooks is currently writing, then that person is the real loser, waylaid by one's own doing you-know-what into the wind.
To spend one's energy reading Brooks just to chastise him seems an incredible waste of one's time and energy. I, for one, largely ignore those whose writings do not engender respect from me. However, I suppose those who are prone to do you-know-what into the wind are also likely to do you-know-what on a hydrant, trying to stake out turf, oblivious to the indifference of all but those others crowding around the same hydrant.
One line alone in this piece makes it worthwhile, even if you look no farther:
"It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues."
5
Gumption is what I know I lack. My hands are shaking so that I could hardly type. This is the first time I was so moved after reading your essay I felt compelled to make a comment. The word that came to me after reading your essay was AMEN.
2
My grown sons, my husband and I all simultaneously read your piece David Brooks and found such meaning. I am sorry for those Democrats who commented who could only see your political leaning and could not see you as a person, a human being. They are as bad as those Republicans who might demonize all democrats.
2
I work hard. I spend most of my moral capital on family and close friends. I vote Democrat when feeling philanthropic, Republican when less so, and Libertarian when wholly selfish. I am truly a work in need of progress. I hope to do better in future. I long for a nobility of character grounded in selflessness and moral purity. Thanks David for the uplift as clearly I need all the help I can get in my stumbling pursuit of happiness. Cheers to all!
3
Good column don't beat yourself up, Mr. Brooks, we need people who can write and shine light on goodness. It takes big ego to get anywhere in this competitive world, and" big ego" is a strong and dangerous drive; it is how one uses their platform once they have achieved it. All have different gifts, and all can bring a more compassionate world. Our leaders in government , education and business would benefit from reflecting on the ideals of this essay.
2
Best David Brooks column in years. Thanks, David.
4
Bravo! Well plotted and written. We'd all do well to absorb and act on these concepts.
1
The biggest question is why is there something rather than nothing? Not far behind is the question of when is their something rather than nothing? David, thanks for trying to answer the second question.
2
O.K., Mr. B.: your excellent essay reminds one of those high-falutin' Greeks; they began each day with an attempt to do "good". Right?
Even if some of us have had no choice but to be "independent", it's the right approach, isn't it?
Currently, having had a Christian education (with the Sisters of St. Joseph), I learned to regret missing an "education" that included street smarts. For years, I appeared to be gullible and ignorant of "the ways of the world". But coping with any number of corrupt people changed that.
Hence, I appreciate the theory in your fine op-ed; one that could serve as a guide to us all. Thanks.
Even if some of us have had no choice but to be "independent", it's the right approach, isn't it?
Currently, having had a Christian education (with the Sisters of St. Joseph), I learned to regret missing an "education" that included street smarts. For years, I appeared to be gullible and ignorant of "the ways of the world". But coping with any number of corrupt people changed that.
Hence, I appreciate the theory in your fine op-ed; one that could serve as a guide to us all. Thanks.
2
A friend of mine, over the past almost four years, speaks to me about 'going deeper' when I think I've reached new levels of insight about racial bias, prison reform as well as shedding my own biases throughout my six decades of living. Even after I think I've reached greater plateaus and have embraced a core of fiercely strong and selflessly loving people whose lives have intersected mine and I wait for his praises, he challenges me to dig deeper and to break down more of the wall I've built up over the years to finally acheive the "Ah hah moment". I am so grateful for him and for those who are helping me to continue to explore this path that I am walking.
Thank you, David Brooks, for articulating what this man and I are working to achieve together.
Thank you, David Brooks, for articulating what this man and I are working to achieve together.
2
Dear Mr. Brooks,
What is this - The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Saints? Some folks are genuinely humble, loving, and good. That you run into one of them once a month must be so frustrating. Perhaps they forgot to take a course in self-promotion.
Cordially,
S.A. Traina
What is this - The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Saints? Some folks are genuinely humble, loving, and good. That you run into one of them once a month must be so frustrating. Perhaps they forgot to take a course in self-promotion.
Cordially,
S.A. Traina
5
Immediately, I thought of a friend who works as a home health aide for a ridiculously low hourly, and who's also worked as a teacher and in a number of other "service professions." She is both very smart --- a self-learner --- and empathic almost to a fault, many of us, her friends, trying to help her establish appropriate boundaries to keep her from getting used by charlatans. Her life illustrates the tremendous unfairness of our society in failing to value such individuals as bulwarks of its moral center, failing to pay them a living wage because it cannot recognize their immense value. She turns 66 next month --- thank goodness for social security, which will help her live with far less of a financial struggle. And like Mr. Brooks, I have spent the past 10 years growing as a person --- in her direction --- recognizing that my employment/accomplishment CV has become irrelevant to who I want to be. Regardless of anything else, we, her friends, love, value, and admire her far beyond her own résumé. If I had a million dollars . . . .
3
In Barack Obama's second book "The Audacity of Hope" he wrote why he entered public service as an elected official.
Coming out of Harvard Law, he easily found a very well-paying job in a private Chicago law firm. But he felt restrained in this role...so he quit and ran for state senator...and lost. But he ran again introducing himself to every person in his district. He chose the Dems as he felt that they were the party who took care of their fellow man. That a safety net was necessary for a fully functional society. A rising tide should lift all boats.
God knows I have tried to place other needs above mine. I chose to set up and run rural clinics, work with the disenfranchised and give them the best care I could even when I was working with cast off equipment, clinics I could lease at $1/year...then renovated it mostly myself. I strived to never feel superior to others, that my housekeepers made a living wage along with all my workers.
I think I have "sucker" written across my forehead as I give my patients my business card with my personal cell phone...heck I will give it to people I meet in the grocery store.."Call me I can help you get that electric bill paid, find a service dog for your son with seizures." I set up a way for our returning vets to all get service dogs and we had no suicides.
I had watched my father a business executive do all this, worked for his church, helped others in the community...and when he died his eulogy was "Howard was a good man."
Coming out of Harvard Law, he easily found a very well-paying job in a private Chicago law firm. But he felt restrained in this role...so he quit and ran for state senator...and lost. But he ran again introducing himself to every person in his district. He chose the Dems as he felt that they were the party who took care of their fellow man. That a safety net was necessary for a fully functional society. A rising tide should lift all boats.
God knows I have tried to place other needs above mine. I chose to set up and run rural clinics, work with the disenfranchised and give them the best care I could even when I was working with cast off equipment, clinics I could lease at $1/year...then renovated it mostly myself. I strived to never feel superior to others, that my housekeepers made a living wage along with all my workers.
I think I have "sucker" written across my forehead as I give my patients my business card with my personal cell phone...heck I will give it to people I meet in the grocery store.."Call me I can help you get that electric bill paid, find a service dog for your son with seizures." I set up a way for our returning vets to all get service dogs and we had no suicides.
I had watched my father a business executive do all this, worked for his church, helped others in the community...and when he died his eulogy was "Howard was a good man."
4
Charles Handy is a name that every American should know, he could easily have written this op-ed and perchance he did. Mr Handy is one of the great minds making its way around this planet but somehow he manages to avoid falling into an ideological box so that he can dismiss the rantings of "serious" thinkers like the Brooks Brothers.
Charles Handy is a philosopher specializing in organizational behaviour and has postulated and proven that paying minimal wages lowers productivity and paying obscenely high salaries in no way improves performance.
Charles Handy's belief that it is better to live free and be poor than to be rich at the service of others seems an excellent reminder of who and what David Brooks is and who he represents.
My father used to recall the two beautiful young cousins who were sacrificed to Mammon at the Triangle Shirtwaist factory I am deeply hurt by Mr Brooks shameful reference to an incident that epitomizes the shameful disregard for human life that his sponsors demand he support.
Charles Handy is a philosopher specializing in organizational behaviour and has postulated and proven that paying minimal wages lowers productivity and paying obscenely high salaries in no way improves performance.
Charles Handy's belief that it is better to live free and be poor than to be rich at the service of others seems an excellent reminder of who and what David Brooks is and who he represents.
My father used to recall the two beautiful young cousins who were sacrificed to Mammon at the Triangle Shirtwaist factory I am deeply hurt by Mr Brooks shameful reference to an incident that epitomizes the shameful disregard for human life that his sponsors demand he support.
8
I don't know that I've ever read the Op Ed before. I am not familiar with Mr. Brooks or his politics. But this piece is spot on. Spot on in its questions, its supposed "pontifications" and its ironies. That is the human condition and Mr. Brooks is trying to shed light on something that is hard to explain and even harder to live. It isn't consistent or easily achieved. But it is a journey worth taking. If only to learn to get out of your head and into a place that doesn't have clear rules and lines - where republicans can be democrats- democrats, republicans and human beings, the mass of contradictions that they are. In that place, between what we see and know and what we feel, is the place of individual truth - where inner light can find a path to the surface. Thank you for trying to touch it.
4
I have forgotten the source but in Jewish tradition it is noted that the quickest most effective way to self esteem is to do something good for someone else. In practice I have found that this method works instantly. And it's so easy.
2
What a thoughtful, perceptive column! Thanks.
1
Give me a break gentlemen. We all know words will never suffice to fully explain the human condition, but does that mean we have to nitpick someone who does it less imperfectly than most?
2
David Brooks "moral bucket list" is an interesting column, but for me it is missing something significant. His column seems more like a church sermon, not a way to really understand goodness. He ends with "there are the people we want to be" Really? All of us? My thinking is to focus more on what I would call "moral opportunity". What kind of society and inner personality leads to the moral person? To adopting a moral bucket? There are cultural factors that increase the probability of high morality -- for example, an open, egalitarian economic structure, models of good people that are widely shared and praised, society idealism and hope. There are the values taught at home and in community. There are the many potential experiences that can change us, such as interactions with a church leader, a social worker, a teacher,a well taught subject like science or history, a parent, a sports figure, even reading a book. There is empathy -- or not. In this same Sunday Review issue, there is a story about the pressures that children face to make a success of themselves, to get into the very best colleges, to beat everyone else. These pressures are not conducive to developing generosity of spirit, concern for the poor or disabled, and "getting outside oneself". Some may overcome these pressures, but many cannot and do not. David Brooks has just hit the tip of the iceberg here, and a lot more thinking has to go into why people develop their "moral buckets".
67
I love this reflection ( Mr Brooks, are you sure you're not a closet progressive?)
I'm so glad you mentioned Frances Perkins - who should be the 1st woman to be placed on the twenty dollar bill. But few know of her contributions.
At my stepson's graduation from SUNY Maritime some years back, the speaker was a Coast Guard Commander - I don't remember the name - but his central message was that no one achieves anything without others; that even if you achieve some title or rank, you cannot accomplish important work without other people - so you have to learn to value others. He took such a different approach to his commencement address that I still remember the core of it, years later.
I'm so glad you mentioned Frances Perkins - who should be the 1st woman to be placed on the twenty dollar bill. But few know of her contributions.
At my stepson's graduation from SUNY Maritime some years back, the speaker was a Coast Guard Commander - I don't remember the name - but his central message was that no one achieves anything without others; that even if you achieve some title or rank, you cannot accomplish important work without other people - so you have to learn to value others. He took such a different approach to his commencement address that I still remember the core of it, years later.
5
Humility is a wonderful trait for any human being to possess, but it is too often claimed by people who have really only known adversity, not humiliation. Adversity is experienced by almost every individual, but humiliation is really only known by those from very trying and rough socioeconomic backgrounds, the involuntary version, (a life of poverty, a life with a disgraced family name, a life as a member of the "wrong" ethnic group in the wrong place, in the etc.) or by those who, in dreaming big, tried for something worthwhile or even noble that was well beyond their reach and met disaster instead of triumph, the voluntary version.
One of the most personal questions one can ever ask another person is if he or she has known humiliation, and how that affected (and, possibly, still affects) him or her. The lucky ones are not the ones to have never known it, but the ones who have confronted and learned from it. It sounds, therefore, easy to say that this is something everyone should experience, at least once, except for the fact that almost by definition humiliation is a shattering event. Worst of all, what for some is an experience is known to others as their life.
Turning political, I don't think elite Republicans have even the foggiest notion of (real) humility or else they have forgotten it long ago. This is not to say that elite Democrats really know it that well, either, but relative to the other party, through their policies, they show a profound understanding of it.
One of the most personal questions one can ever ask another person is if he or she has known humiliation, and how that affected (and, possibly, still affects) him or her. The lucky ones are not the ones to have never known it, but the ones who have confronted and learned from it. It sounds, therefore, easy to say that this is something everyone should experience, at least once, except for the fact that almost by definition humiliation is a shattering event. Worst of all, what for some is an experience is known to others as their life.
Turning political, I don't think elite Republicans have even the foggiest notion of (real) humility or else they have forgotten it long ago. This is not to say that elite Democrats really know it that well, either, but relative to the other party, through their policies, they show a profound understanding of it.
108
Does humiliation promote humility? The surface form of the words ("-ation") could suggest it, but I doubt it.
Dear Mr. Brooks,
As an orphan who has worked his entire life, whose mother was shattered by the death of her husband, whose brother was traumatized into muteness, who has witnessed and participated in great poverty - and who has overcome it all with the great help of an extended family, the Catholic church, the grace of God and my great Uncle Sam - I pray for you.
I pray that you tell truth to power and reject the tribe of power.
I pray that you stand for the middle class and fight for their right to be treated fairly and humanely.
I pray you fight for education for everyone.
I pray that you have pity on the poor and you fight for them so that they can have dignity and healing in their lives - especially healing.
I pray that you simply fight for right and not just the right-wing
I pray you reject the soulness Machiavelli and discover the soulful Aurelius.
I pray you find your soul.
As an orphan who has worked his entire life, whose mother was shattered by the death of her husband, whose brother was traumatized into muteness, who has witnessed and participated in great poverty - and who has overcome it all with the great help of an extended family, the Catholic church, the grace of God and my great Uncle Sam - I pray for you.
I pray that you tell truth to power and reject the tribe of power.
I pray that you stand for the middle class and fight for their right to be treated fairly and humanely.
I pray you fight for education for everyone.
I pray that you have pity on the poor and you fight for them so that they can have dignity and healing in their lives - especially healing.
I pray that you simply fight for right and not just the right-wing
I pray you reject the soulness Machiavelli and discover the soulful Aurelius.
I pray you find your soul.
16
For me, the most important trait outlined here is humility. This trait is hard to really own because our culture trumpets pride and success and mastery and confidence. However, the humility to know one's failures an weaknesses, and the confidence to create community in sharing those, to expose oneself, leaves the door open to real moral evolution. This humility leads to a type of self examination that seeks help and needs others. The opposite is to walk around in a vain narcissism that blankets oneself from moral examination; these people know how to judge others very well. Without humility, moral growth is impossible.
87
David is at the age, and enjoys the privileges in this life, that allow him to appreciate that the pursuit of happiness is different than the pursuit of fame, power, success or other worldly pursuits. Good for him.
1
A profoundly nice essay.
America seriously could use many more such pieces.
America seriously could use many more such pieces.
In so many ways you have described Barack Obama. Thank you David.
16
Mr Brooks is someone with whom I do not frequently agree but that is exactly the point of this essay, the search for moral goodness and the recognition of one's own failings and the struggle to be better, the difficult and ever present task we all face. I wish him well.
1
As a young adult, I made a profound choice in an effort to lead a life of deeper value. I think my reasoning was correct, and that choice made an important difference in the life of someone weaker. But I am not quick to recommend a similar choice to the young. I lost much in a selfless choice. I am not sure I would want someone young to make a similar choice. It's one thing to think of being selfless when one has already had so much of what one wanted; another to suggest it to someone who might lose the chance ever to do so. I neither regret not celebrate my own choice: I simply recognize that there is hubris in suggesting selflessness to someone else.
6
Sadly David, you ultimately end up the "pundit" you seem so earnestly try to subsume with virtue....simply by assuming you have us all figured out. Using your observations of self and other as catalyst, you still believe you can explain the world to others...and yet, it would seem the very people you describe as content with themselves, with the world and their place in it would be unlikely candidates to turn their wisdom into unsolicited advice, just as you continue to do. Trying to tell us what we want, what we should want, or even what we are, is beneath the very content of the characters you clearly ache to be seen as. It's a pity really...because you do try so hard. And that is more than many do...according to you.
6
At least he gets people thinking and talking.
Rather than a set of rules, much could be done to improve ourselves by understanding and living by one word: mindfulness. An appreciation of everything else Mr Brooks writes about can follow from mindfulness - defeat, competition, morality, humility, goodness, etc.
I would submit that using the term morality is problematic since it is often used and interpreted in context of a particular religion (or religions). Many people do not subscribe to or are exposed to the faiths that put a lot of effort into defining and selling ideas about morality.
Mindfulness is a far more general and easily understood concept and one needs no books or churches or temples or synagogues to meditate on it or follow where it leads. Faith is strongest when it is personal. And nothing gets more personal than trying to understand and act on mindfulness.
I would submit that using the term morality is problematic since it is often used and interpreted in context of a particular religion (or religions). Many people do not subscribe to or are exposed to the faiths that put a lot of effort into defining and selling ideas about morality.
Mindfulness is a far more general and easily understood concept and one needs no books or churches or temples or synagogues to meditate on it or follow where it leads. Faith is strongest when it is personal. And nothing gets more personal than trying to understand and act on mindfulness.
79
David, thank you for this column. I have been moved by many of your recent columns which are clearly and interestingly not political. I read a lot of spiritual writings from people who are considered wise in this area of life and I must say, many of your observations of late have contained insights that resemble those of people considered spiritually mature. There's a whole community of seekers out there for whom your insights are what their lives are about. I recall a column you wrote years ago, maybe 2007, in which you said that people who occupy the White House must have examined themselves and know who they are in order to survive. I specifically remember that because I knew that Barack Obama was a person who had examined himself. An old axiom - Know Thyself - true across the ages. One of the last steps in this sort of maturity is to abandon either/or thinking and to embrace non duality, both/and thinking. Richard Rohr explains this is his book Falling Upward. What a concept! We could then find good qualities in both Republicans and Democrats, liberals and conservatives.
5
Mr. Brooks, once more floating in higher spheres when the reality of a poorly functioning state and planet poses some other risks. I assume Mr. Brooks sees those problems as well, alas the philosophy of his political friends creates a solid disconnect that he is not allowed to acknowledge.
And so he wanders. In higher morals and spheres...........and calls people that ask for general health insurance: socialists, that call for nuclear agreement with Iran: appeasers, and on...........
Sigh.
And so he wanders. In higher morals and spheres...........and calls people that ask for general health insurance: socialists, that call for nuclear agreement with Iran: appeasers, and on...........
Sigh.
7
Tis is not about republicans or democrats - its about what makes a human a "being"
4
I have often thought, reading Mr Brooks over time, that he seems like a decent person, a kind person. So, it has been hard for me to square that impression with his being a Republican, especially these days with this disastrous and destructive congress, and the frightening messages and practices seen in the potential Republican candidates. I can't imagine why anyone who appears to care about goodness and inner character, and, for goodness sake, has the platform to potentiality make a difference in people's hearts and minds, would not speak against the appalling behavior we have endured from his party in the past 2 decades.
13
I respect soul-searching, just not fumbling around in the dark soul-searching.
Read Abraham Maslow's modest, short book, "Towards A Psychology Of Being", David. Maslow spent a lifetime studying people who were exceptional. He called them "Self-Actualizing. He put innumerable soul-searchers onto a straight path to not must enlightenment, but how to read oneself and others to determine how to achieve one's best, "glowing" self.
I hope this helps you as it helped me when I studied Maslow as a freshman at Yale. It is still, decades late, guiding my life.
Read Abraham Maslow's modest, short book, "Towards A Psychology Of Being", David. Maslow spent a lifetime studying people who were exceptional. He called them "Self-Actualizing. He put innumerable soul-searchers onto a straight path to not must enlightenment, but how to read oneself and others to determine how to achieve one's best, "glowing" self.
I hope this helps you as it helped me when I studied Maslow as a freshman at Yale. It is still, decades late, guiding my life.
This so-called list is so out of touch with reality. Most of us have no difficulty knowing what it means to love deeply, to connect with neighbors and make the community better, to persist when the going gets difficult.
(Most of us have no particular difficulties with humility and character.
Living real life takes care of that, David.)
Here is the real problem-- moral distress.
Us ordinary folk know how we want to nurture children, make a warm community and loving home, serve others-- but we are working in a system that wants to crush every last ounce of initiative, compassion, and work hours out of us. We want to care for our patients, but we have to work 12 hour shifts and have 8 people to care for. We want to nurture our kids but we have to work such long hours that we have to drop them off early at day care and pick them up at the very last moment, when we are all completely frazzled. Who has the energy and time to do as much as we would like for our local school or other parts of our community? We know how we want to live with compassion and conscience, but we are more and more constrained to fall short. We know we are falling short, and it is deeply painful.
David, you can sit in your quiet office and imagine a more vibrant life for yourself, but in the real world,the 1% is squeezing everyone in the name of efficiency and cost-savings, with the subtext that those who don't work harder deserve to fall behind.
The future does not look good for inner virtue.
(Most of us have no particular difficulties with humility and character.
Living real life takes care of that, David.)
Here is the real problem-- moral distress.
Us ordinary folk know how we want to nurture children, make a warm community and loving home, serve others-- but we are working in a system that wants to crush every last ounce of initiative, compassion, and work hours out of us. We want to care for our patients, but we have to work 12 hour shifts and have 8 people to care for. We want to nurture our kids but we have to work such long hours that we have to drop them off early at day care and pick them up at the very last moment, when we are all completely frazzled. Who has the energy and time to do as much as we would like for our local school or other parts of our community? We know how we want to live with compassion and conscience, but we are more and more constrained to fall short. We know we are falling short, and it is deeply painful.
David, you can sit in your quiet office and imagine a more vibrant life for yourself, but in the real world,the 1% is squeezing everyone in the name of efficiency and cost-savings, with the subtext that those who don't work harder deserve to fall behind.
The future does not look good for inner virtue.
617
"They are not thinking about themselves at all." Seems remarkably inconsistent with: "I realized that if I wanted to do that I was going to have to work harder to save my own soul." People who are working to save their souls are thinking of themselves. That's a flaw in the author's thinking here. Still, people can decide to do good, to be good, for reasons that are selfish, and, that's ok - still is a net gain. Good is good - problem becomes how you define it. Ask some religious zealot what is good (or environmental, or political) zealot and it will differ from the other side - is their a defined "good"?
2
"They are not thinking about themselves at all."
Herein lies the beauty of language... the statement should be read to mean they are not self-ish or egocentric; not caring about self-gain.
Herein lies the beauty of language... the statement should be read to mean they are not self-ish or egocentric; not caring about self-gain.
Interesting that he chooses George Eliot, whose great book Middlemarch is essentially about failure and what happens out of that.
Then why are you a Republican Mr. Brooks?
Practice what you preach.
Practice what you preach.
14
This appears to be Brooks's wheelhouse-the thoughtful, a-political essay. Thanks, I thoroughly enjoyed this read. Now, if he'd just stay away from economics.
Why am I unmoved by David's discourse? Because from his perch above, it does not ring true. Come down, and experience the truth of the teeming masses. Yes, selfishness is not a good thing, but self care is. As in most things, balance is called for. Caring for self and caring for others. Suffering the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and coming out,a little bruised, on the other side. That's what builds character. Proselytizing from above does not.
3
Ingratitude is the greatest of sins. So says St. Ignatius, the founder of the Jesuits (Pope Francis' order). I've known such folks that David describes, and they exude gratitude (even though they're not Catholic, but I also have to say they actively avoid politics!).
Excellent! I firmly believe that young persons need to be somewhat egocentric to develop as individuals and reach a level of position and achievement to the point they attain a level of self assurance and economic safety. Then, if they are honest, they should recognize that their success was to a large extent due to important people in their lives, their parents, spouses, and mentors. At this point, they should experience what Brooks describes as The Humility Shift and also start looking outward rather than inward to nature and other people not so fortunate. What so many people like myself feel is so is unfortunate about the current state of the Republican party is a significant drift into more and more Meism which leads to greed and a lack of empathy with those less fortunate. This would not be so bad if it wasn't partnered with the lack of compromise that is apparent in the current Republican party.
Mr. Brooks, Please send this to the members of the Republican National Committee. Thank you.
if i were to succeed in becoming less narcissistic, how would i know?
Thank you, David Brooks, for a compelling column. I will share with my beautiful granddaughter graduating from high school this June. One small item - rather than using only the feminine pronoun in your last few paragraphs, more balance is needed. Men share the need for the lessons contained in your column; perhaps in greater proportions than women.
"moral and spiritual accomplishments"
David, all you need do is: stop accomplishing and achieving; stop considering the contents of your obituary; forget about the past and the future; live your life in real-time and be kind to everyone and everything you encounter. Whenever you are in a quandary as to what to say, do or write, ask yourself how the application love can be brought to bear. The more that you are able to do that, the more everything else will simply seem to come into focus. If you truly do want to change yourself, or the world for that matter, change your perspective - it is not as difficult as it may sound.
David, all you need do is: stop accomplishing and achieving; stop considering the contents of your obituary; forget about the past and the future; live your life in real-time and be kind to everyone and everything you encounter. Whenever you are in a quandary as to what to say, do or write, ask yourself how the application love can be brought to bear. The more that you are able to do that, the more everything else will simply seem to come into focus. If you truly do want to change yourself, or the world for that matter, change your perspective - it is not as difficult as it may sound.
3
Brilliant, Mr. Brooks.
1
Morality is as morality does.
6
"I'm a pundit, more or less paid to appear smarter and better than I really am."
Feel free to enter a sincere NOT GUILTY plea on this one, David. (joke)
Feel free to enter a sincere NOT GUILTY plea on this one, David. (joke)
1
With an essay such as this I suspect that you are soon to be expelled from the GOP. You posit that we are all in this together which is heresy to Republicans. What you speak of here violates the tenants of the party of Ayn Rand.
7
There are several self-validating posts herein ascribing what is essentially malice and hatred to those who disagree with the majority left-of-center opinion among NY Times readers.
Perhaps the journey Mr Brooks refers to could include not thinking that those with whom you disagree have base motives.
Perhaps the journey Mr Brooks refers to could include not thinking that those with whom you disagree have base motives.
As I read the responses to. Mr. Brooks' column week after week I wonder if he ever reads them. They hold up a mirror to himself that few of us ever are privileged to receive outside of group therapy. Take these comments to heart, sir, and use them to become the kind of person with the kind of philosophy that you say you admire but who seems completely absent from the party you hold up as preferable. Sad. Sad.
9
I'm not usually a David Brooks fan, but I was profoundly moved by this. Reading the comments by teacherinvt reminded me of the difference we could each make if we could 'be the change we want to see in the world.'
1
Thank you, Mr. Brooks. This is the wisest column you've ever written. More in this vein, please.
1
I could focus on the idea that I'm a wretch and embark on a quest for moral improvement. But why?
I'm happy, people love me and I love them. I'm fully capable of applying my considerable intellectual and emotional powers to any end I might choose. Sure, I could attach myself to Brooks's quest or follow the paths of other seekers and teachers like him. The reason I don't is I reject the premise that there's something essentially wrong with my way of thinking about myself and others and the universe.
Why throw myself down Brooks's rabbit hole when I'm already the person I and my loved ones want me to be?
I'm happy, people love me and I love them. I'm fully capable of applying my considerable intellectual and emotional powers to any end I might choose. Sure, I could attach myself to Brooks's quest or follow the paths of other seekers and teachers like him. The reason I don't is I reject the premise that there's something essentially wrong with my way of thinking about myself and others and the universe.
Why throw myself down Brooks's rabbit hole when I'm already the person I and my loved ones want me to be?
1
A while ago, David, you were enthralled by the "resume building" activities of your daughter's friends. Starting their own businesses (which were of marginal value to society). Its great that you see the other side, but people you praise in this article are probably not Republicans.
5
It is amazing that you hold such decent and honorable values, yet you David are loyal to the racist hatful party that is determined to destroy the Obama Presidency as well as the nation in their tantrum of that as a spoiled brat. Your contradiction is difficult to understand.
43
When you are too busy thinking about yourself, you cannot think about the other.
2
Now you're talking, Mr. Brooks. Thank you.
3
"About once a month I run across a person who radiates an inner light."
I found this in another article by Mr. Brooks: "And yet Heschel understood that the faith expressed by many, even many who are inwardly conflicted, is often dull, oppressive and insipid — a religiosity in which “faith is completely replaced by creed, worship by discipline, love by habit; when the crisis of today is ignored because of the splendor of the past; when faith becomes an heirloom rather than a living fountain; when religion speaks only in the name of authority rather than with the voice of compassion.”
Jesus said his purpose in coming was to teach the Way to the inner light - the kingdom within each of us, of love and peace and joy. That Way is love, shown by letting go of anything that is not loving - and doing unto others as we would have them unto do us. It's a natural law - like attracts like. Perhaps if we practiced that one rule, those jobs would show up, those happy experiences would be more likely to happen.
We need thousands upon thousands of churches to teach the way to that "inner light."
It seems like the natural place to do it. Governmental institutions are not allowed to do it, most parents don't know enough to do it. Church is the one place where they could do it!
Every moment of every day we have choices to make - does this express love, or does it not. Being aware is Step No. 1.
I found this in another article by Mr. Brooks: "And yet Heschel understood that the faith expressed by many, even many who are inwardly conflicted, is often dull, oppressive and insipid — a religiosity in which “faith is completely replaced by creed, worship by discipline, love by habit; when the crisis of today is ignored because of the splendor of the past; when faith becomes an heirloom rather than a living fountain; when religion speaks only in the name of authority rather than with the voice of compassion.”
Jesus said his purpose in coming was to teach the Way to the inner light - the kingdom within each of us, of love and peace and joy. That Way is love, shown by letting go of anything that is not loving - and doing unto others as we would have them unto do us. It's a natural law - like attracts like. Perhaps if we practiced that one rule, those jobs would show up, those happy experiences would be more likely to happen.
We need thousands upon thousands of churches to teach the way to that "inner light."
It seems like the natural place to do it. Governmental institutions are not allowed to do it, most parents don't know enough to do it. Church is the one place where they could do it!
Every moment of every day we have choices to make - does this express love, or does it not. Being aware is Step No. 1.
4
Refreshing to see Frances Perkins cited in David's excellent essay. The takeaway for many will be that tolerance and compassion is the right path. Does this not fly in the face of American corporate capitalism? David, your next assignment will be to capture these principles in policies that will turn America in a different direction. "...decenters the self." Well said.
8
I was amazed to see Perkins in this list given DB's normal lack of empathy for workers as opposed to the upper rungs of the corporate class.
1
A beautiful use of your role as a pundit, to inspire us to strive to be better than we were in the past and align ourselves with the greater good. It resonates with the longest run-on sentence in AA, (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 122, that ends 'True ambition is the deep desire to live usefully and walk humbly'. Well done.
4
Excellent article. Thank you DB. If we can find those quiet moments- like a breath of space in a crowd, or a feeling of unqualified love for a stranger for example- and really see them as they are, true happiness is possible.
2
A thoughtful and uplifting op-ed from Mr. Brooks once again. I feel compelled to nit pick though about some of his theoretical posits. First, as any adherent to Jungian theory is aware of, every soul contains elements of the shadow archetype. Though there are those who radiate an inner light and serve as a moral lighthouse beacon to others, it is wise to remember that they may be masking their "shadow self."
The mere image of the "good woman" planting seeds is pleasant although further enhances the societal stereotype of women needing to exude some moral purity & goodness in order to properly fit into society. Most of the examples of "moral" people that Mr. Brooks chooses are women, further underscoring his emphasis on proper female behavior. In fact, as my memory serves me, a few weeks ago he was diminishing women in teaching while exalting Apple founder, Steve Jobs, as some sort of demigod.
This sort of Machiavellian zig zagging in punditry needs to be examined from an overall analysis of the totality of writing, rather than one single column. When one's thoughts are inconstant as a sailboat on an open sea without a moral compass, there tends to be an undercurrent of insincerity in the message of the writer. In contrast, George Elliot, who is considered to be one of the leading female English novelists of the Victorian era, wrote with spotless conviction. Unfortunately, she was trapped into a Victorian mindset which constricted her ability to deepen her literary themes.
The mere image of the "good woman" planting seeds is pleasant although further enhances the societal stereotype of women needing to exude some moral purity & goodness in order to properly fit into society. Most of the examples of "moral" people that Mr. Brooks chooses are women, further underscoring his emphasis on proper female behavior. In fact, as my memory serves me, a few weeks ago he was diminishing women in teaching while exalting Apple founder, Steve Jobs, as some sort of demigod.
This sort of Machiavellian zig zagging in punditry needs to be examined from an overall analysis of the totality of writing, rather than one single column. When one's thoughts are inconstant as a sailboat on an open sea without a moral compass, there tends to be an undercurrent of insincerity in the message of the writer. In contrast, George Elliot, who is considered to be one of the leading female English novelists of the Victorian era, wrote with spotless conviction. Unfortunately, she was trapped into a Victorian mindset which constricted her ability to deepen her literary themes.
12
To find inner peace and true fulfillment in life, one needs only to give a gift, unconditionally. Ponder the option of being a non-directed, living kidney donor.
"Once in a while you can get shown the light
in the strangest of places if you look at it right"
"Scarlet Begonias" by the Grateful Dead (lyrics by Robert Hunter)
in the strangest of places if you look at it right"
"Scarlet Begonias" by the Grateful Dead (lyrics by Robert Hunter)
2
Brooks: "ABOUT once a month I run across a person who radiates an inner light."
David Brooks, in this article, provides some much needed light for the darkness that afflicts the belligerent milieu where we all are living at this time in history.
Like him, I have had the good fortune in my life to encounter people who radiate "an inner light." Many of these people I did not ever personally meet, but became aware of them by reading what they wrote or what others wrote about them. But I have also personally meet many of these virtuous people -- too numerous to mention here -- and I call them, for lack of a better term at this point in time, "saints." However, most them -- perhaps all of them --will never, I am most certain, ever be canonized as saints by my (Catholic) church, because many were neither very pious nor Catholic christians, members of a church that has a way or recognizing heroic virtue.
I got this idea of calling them "saints" from a book by Robert Ellsberg, who was influenced by the Dorothy Day noted in this article by Brooks. His book was entitled "All Saints," and the book includes people of all religions and some of no religion, but they all manifested "an inner light" to which Brooks calls our attention.
Thanks, David Brooks; others may not have needed this one by you but this is one reader that did. These folks that radiate that "inner light" have much to teach all of us, and we need to be paying attention to them.
David Brooks, in this article, provides some much needed light for the darkness that afflicts the belligerent milieu where we all are living at this time in history.
Like him, I have had the good fortune in my life to encounter people who radiate "an inner light." Many of these people I did not ever personally meet, but became aware of them by reading what they wrote or what others wrote about them. But I have also personally meet many of these virtuous people -- too numerous to mention here -- and I call them, for lack of a better term at this point in time, "saints." However, most them -- perhaps all of them --will never, I am most certain, ever be canonized as saints by my (Catholic) church, because many were neither very pious nor Catholic christians, members of a church that has a way or recognizing heroic virtue.
I got this idea of calling them "saints" from a book by Robert Ellsberg, who was influenced by the Dorothy Day noted in this article by Brooks. His book was entitled "All Saints," and the book includes people of all religions and some of no religion, but they all manifested "an inner light" to which Brooks calls our attention.
Thanks, David Brooks; others may not have needed this one by you but this is one reader that did. These folks that radiate that "inner light" have much to teach all of us, and we need to be paying attention to them.
5
I hate to say this, but if you only meet these people once in a rare while, its probably because you don't hang out with this kind or crowd. There's still people who care about others: many teachers, clergy, social workers, doctors, therapists, civil rights activists, etc. still care, in spite of those who try to drag them down.
1
I will admit that I am not usually a fan of David Brooks. However, this was a thoughtful and inspiring piece. His choice of Dorothy Day as an example was interesting. One of the things I take from her story, and from many of the people of the sort Brooks is writing about, it that her compassion and love were not dependent on the actions of the recipient. If we add to the sum total of love and compassion with our actions, that is enough. I guess the challenge is to develop our individual compassion, and in the process create a compassionate society.
175
Thank you for sharing this rich template of self enhancement. It has the capability for people to develop unlimited potential in becoming more gracious and generous throughout their lives.
The wonderful examples given really do put things in perfect perspective because each one made a conscious effort and decision to make changes within their own lives which consequently benefited others greatly.
Merely being content with my lot in life often times leaves me feeling empty, milling about aimlessly with no real sense of fulfillment or joy or purpose This article was like a slap across my face, waking me to what really should matter in life. At the end of each day, I should be questioning how I could be a better person to myself and others. This kind of self-reflection is essential and necessary in attaining inner happiness, love and sustainability of the soul.
At the end of every day I ask myself how could I have been a better person today.
I seem to be surrounded by so many individuals who are drowning in self-pity or anger for more reasons than I can count.
The wonderful examples given really do put things in perfect perspective because each one made a conscious effort and decision to make changes within their own lives which consequently benefited others greatly.
Merely being content with my lot in life often times leaves me feeling empty, milling about aimlessly with no real sense of fulfillment or joy or purpose This article was like a slap across my face, waking me to what really should matter in life. At the end of each day, I should be questioning how I could be a better person to myself and others. This kind of self-reflection is essential and necessary in attaining inner happiness, love and sustainability of the soul.
At the end of every day I ask myself how could I have been a better person today.
I seem to be surrounded by so many individuals who are drowning in self-pity or anger for more reasons than I can count.
110
I think the first key to happiness is to move those angry, self pitying people along...to other people. In other words, get rid of them. Let them drift away, don't find time to see them or meet with them. They will get the message and seek out other people who want to enable them in their anger and self pity. You can't be free and happy with people like that around you.
If we learn anything from this rehash of well.intentioned fluff, it is that Mr. Brooks has learned to compartmentalize his two apparent "worldviews", which are contradictory, and leave him sliding toward hypocrisy.
28
Although I would like to agree with your moral bucket list and see no harm in an individual attempting to check off the list of moral virtues in this article, but my association with people who radiate inner light tells me they are born not made. When I visit my sister, who would be classified as an inner light ideal, I am almost paralyzed by her unending kindness and endless giving of her time and talent to others, without ever taking her own needs into account. That is not to say, that we all shouldn't pay attention to this bucket list, but as much as I try, I will never match my sister's inner DNA moral bucket list.
1
What lovely choices for role models!
Francis Perkins "would have been famous simply by being the first woman cabinet member, but her legacy stems from her accomplishments. She was largely responsible for the U.S. adoption of social security, unemployment insurance, federal laws regulating child labor, and adoption of the federal minimum wage."
Dorothy Day "advocated the Catholic economic theory of distributism [Hi, Pope Francis!]. In the 1930s, Day worked closely with fellow activist Peter Maurin to establish the Catholic Worker Movement, a pacifist movement that continues to combine direct aid for the poor and homeless with nonviolent direct action on their behalf."
Dwight Eisenhower: "Although conservatism in politics was strong during the 1950s and Eisenhower generally espoused conservative sentiments ... [he] looked to moderation and cooperation as a means of governance.
"Although he sought to slow or contain the New Deal and other federal programs, [Eisenhower] did not attempt to repeal them outright ... Conservative critics of his administration found that he did not do enough to advance the goals of the right ... "
Ike also championed the Interstate Highway System, which is crumbling beneath our wheels. Fixing and maintaining it would put hundreds of thousands of Americans back to work for very healthy wages, but today's conservatives are disinclined to make that happen. I hope they read this column and take it to heart.
Francis Perkins "would have been famous simply by being the first woman cabinet member, but her legacy stems from her accomplishments. She was largely responsible for the U.S. adoption of social security, unemployment insurance, federal laws regulating child labor, and adoption of the federal minimum wage."
Dorothy Day "advocated the Catholic economic theory of distributism [Hi, Pope Francis!]. In the 1930s, Day worked closely with fellow activist Peter Maurin to establish the Catholic Worker Movement, a pacifist movement that continues to combine direct aid for the poor and homeless with nonviolent direct action on their behalf."
Dwight Eisenhower: "Although conservatism in politics was strong during the 1950s and Eisenhower generally espoused conservative sentiments ... [he] looked to moderation and cooperation as a means of governance.
"Although he sought to slow or contain the New Deal and other federal programs, [Eisenhower] did not attempt to repeal them outright ... Conservative critics of his administration found that he did not do enough to advance the goals of the right ... "
Ike also championed the Interstate Highway System, which is crumbling beneath our wheels. Fixing and maintaining it would put hundreds of thousands of Americans back to work for very healthy wages, but today's conservatives are disinclined to make that happen. I hope they read this column and take it to heart.
14
I wonder how David's Republican fellow-travelers would characterize these great Americans if they were alive and active today. Actually, I know: Liberals who HATE AMERICA!
The article started with a good promise but it did not deliver. It is always a put-off when certain steps are enumerated in order to achieve moral betterment. The article somehow reminds me of the way Buddhism goes about teaching: 4 or 5 *proven* principles that you have to follow in order to achieve such and such. Again suggestive of a seller listing the features of a vacuum cleaner he wants to sell you.
Beautiful and inspiring… David Brooks is at his best when he is not forced to defend those mean spirited Republicans.
3
Virtues are virtues. "Résumé virtues" is a self-serving phrase for "credentials", not virtues.
1
Your thoughtful and earnest article gave me reason to reflect on my journey. I shared it with those I love. Materialism provides transitory happiness and what is the value of accolades at life's end? I think it would be revealing to know the age of the readers who have commented on this article.
David and others,
I suggest adding this book and its work to your Moral Bucket List:
The Book of Forgiving, The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World, by Desmond Tutu, Mpho Tutu
https://www.forgivenesschallenge.com/book/
http://www.harpercollins.com/9780062203564/the-book-of-forgiving
The chapter Forgiving Yourself can help you on your personal journey, and help you to put into your past the affiliation with views and policies you have previously espoused.
I suggest adding this book and its work to your Moral Bucket List:
The Book of Forgiving, The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World, by Desmond Tutu, Mpho Tutu
https://www.forgivenesschallenge.com/book/
http://www.harpercollins.com/9780062203564/the-book-of-forgiving
The chapter Forgiving Yourself can help you on your personal journey, and help you to put into your past the affiliation with views and policies you have previously espoused.
1
Very thoughtful. You sound like a Democrat, David - why not join us?
14
Bravo! David!
How did you know how did you know what it feels like to have had critical brain surgery and almost died to understand all of this -- that i don't completely understand, but feel.
I want to do good work in the world, it is the only thing that satisfies me, that makes me happy. I will share this commentary with everyone I know.
How did you know how did you know what it feels like to have had critical brain surgery and almost died to understand all of this -- that i don't completely understand, but feel.
I want to do good work in the world, it is the only thing that satisfies me, that makes me happy. I will share this commentary with everyone I know.
There is hope yet for you David.
Next time you look in the mirror, try to see someone other than yourself, someone who wasn't granted the opportunities your were granted. Then ask yourself, what could I do to make life more bearable for the less fortunate? That is the moment you may conclude that you've made some choices based on the benefits you'll be given, not others. You may find the answer to the conundrum you're pondering. One must possess boots to have bootstraps to grasp on to.
Next time you look in the mirror, try to see someone other than yourself, someone who wasn't granted the opportunities your were granted. Then ask yourself, what could I do to make life more bearable for the less fortunate? That is the moment you may conclude that you've made some choices based on the benefits you'll be given, not others. You may find the answer to the conundrum you're pondering. One must possess boots to have bootstraps to grasp on to.
7
Thank you, David.
I wish I could get my teen-aged granddaughter to read
your column and take it to heart, especially the final
paragraph. If at some point in our lives, our hearts are
empty of untold gratitude, our emptiness controls
our lives.
I wish I could get my teen-aged granddaughter to read
your column and take it to heart, especially the final
paragraph. If at some point in our lives, our hearts are
empty of untold gratitude, our emptiness controls
our lives.
1
Reading these comments is a very draining experience. Liberal-conservative-red-blue blah, blah, blah. Frankly, you sound like a bunch of self-serving, jerks on both sides. David Brooks writes about ways to improve yourself, ways to reach out and help others, and all you can do is see politics in every word. No wonder this country is such a mess. Nobody seems to listen, but everybody knows what to do. A true ship of fools sailing to a cliff and arguing about whether they should go to the left or to the right for the lifeboats while the roar of the waterfall gets louder and louder.
12
Maybe it's because I don't enjoy being lectured about morality by someone who spends the bulk of his professional life supporting, in the most public way, the most immoral elements in American politics. I don't see what's self-serving or "jerky" about that.
Lecturing others about morality when you've made a career out of serving as lapdog to the 1% takes a good bit of what we in New York call chutzpah.
"David Brooks writes about ways to improve yourself." Gee, thanks David.
Lecturing others about morality when you've made a career out of serving as lapdog to the 1% takes a good bit of what we in New York call chutzpah.
"David Brooks writes about ways to improve yourself." Gee, thanks David.
2
I kinda feel like David Brooks, at times, when I run across a beatific being who radiates an inner light that infuses me with a preternatural, internal warmth of universal harmony. It makes me want to be the person Mr. Brooks describes.
I'm being a bit facetious, here, but, in all honesty, I've always enjoyed reading Walt Whitman's "Leaves of Grass." I've read his poems for over 40 years, in all kinds of emotional and mental weather, and he never strikes me as false. His last poem, "Goodbye My Fancy" probably constitutes the closest I can come to having a religious opinion about life, i.e., it's all a big mystery.
But coming from the working class (my dad worked in a shipyard), and having been around good, ethical people most of my life, I think that you can find these people everywhere, every day, and that is why we are not savages. I don't think finding moral people can be compared to, say, the Harvard acceptance rate. I don't think it's that hard to be ethical, sensible, humble, and, yes, even moral. It does take some effort, though, as Whitman says of the "Open Road." It's not just given to everybody.
Emerson shared Brooks's high-minded definitions of things, and in his essay, "The Poet," he despairs of every being that man, though he tried, unsuccessfully. He said, "I search in vain for the man I describe." To his credit, he welcomed Whitman's "Leaves of Grass," as rough and common as it was. Don't make moral perfection the enemy of the good.
I'm being a bit facetious, here, but, in all honesty, I've always enjoyed reading Walt Whitman's "Leaves of Grass." I've read his poems for over 40 years, in all kinds of emotional and mental weather, and he never strikes me as false. His last poem, "Goodbye My Fancy" probably constitutes the closest I can come to having a religious opinion about life, i.e., it's all a big mystery.
But coming from the working class (my dad worked in a shipyard), and having been around good, ethical people most of my life, I think that you can find these people everywhere, every day, and that is why we are not savages. I don't think finding moral people can be compared to, say, the Harvard acceptance rate. I don't think it's that hard to be ethical, sensible, humble, and, yes, even moral. It does take some effort, though, as Whitman says of the "Open Road." It's not just given to everybody.
Emerson shared Brooks's high-minded definitions of things, and in his essay, "The Poet," he despairs of every being that man, though he tried, unsuccessfully. He said, "I search in vain for the man I describe." To his credit, he welcomed Whitman's "Leaves of Grass," as rough and common as it was. Don't make moral perfection the enemy of the good.
174
All life is connected to all life. To look outward is a form of looking inward. When we deeply love and understand ourselves we attain the ability of understanding and loving all others, who, at bottom, are other versions of ourselves. Those individuals who possess the characteristics which David Brooks identifies have, through a combination of inborn talents and acquired skills, understood the basic fact that underneath all is one. That understanding is what produces the glow which David has seen.
1
A welcome surprise to read; free of political views but deeply appropriate to the gestation of self from which all decisions arise, political and otherwise. Notably absent from this wonderful narrative is reference to any deity. Our moral compass cannot be sourced from revelation, rather from reasoned reflection on what we are, and guidance by the real stories of those around us, not the tired stories promulgated by the religious institutions that pretend to purvey truth.
1
I deeply appreciate this column. Clearly much observation and thought went into it, and very useful insights came out. Thank you.
1
Thank you! Very thought-provoking.
1
Mr. Brooks, I applaud you for this article and am going to save it, which is frankly a rare thing for me because I read so many dozens of articles a week that I immediately forget about. So much of your piece (except that part about George Eliot living with a married man) reminds me of the call of Jesus Christ, to be humble, to pursue calling rather than success, to admit our faults, to serve others before ourselves, to depend on God rather than on ourselves. Thank you for pointing to me to Christ today!
2
Not a word about the natural world and how to become fulfilled in it? No reference to such people as John Muir or Henry David Thoreau, who speak to us of the truest kind of inner morality? At the end of this column, Mr. Brooks gives a nod to the inner peace that comes from looking out over a serene valley, but Republicans in Congress recently voted to sell America's public lands -- see Our Land, Up for Grabs, NY Times, op-ed section, April 2, 2015. There is a serious inner flaw in Mr. Brook's support for a political party that works to dismantle the country and corporatize our ability to reach the inner peace that comes from natural connections that Mr. Brook's cannot help but acknowledge, even if only tangentially.
316
This is thought provoking. Though we will all disagree with the answers to some degree, I give Brooks a lot of credit for asking the right questions. Funny (but predictable) how some people will respond with some version of "well that's nice, but you can't be morally good if you are a Republican." If the author were a liberal Democrat, many Republicans would be posting the converse comment. I recommend going back and reading Brooks' column "The Partisan Mindset."
2
The always worth reading Mr. Brooks confuses the ability to make others feel good with moral greatness/moral courage. Hickey--from O'Neill's ICEMAN COMETH--before he goes on his crusade to rid the patrons of Harry Hope's bar of their pipe dreams--was such a makes-you-feel-good person. He also bought free rounds! I've always felt that that the weakness in O'Neill's story was that one needn't be a self-hating wife-murderer to be compelled to speak truth to lies, in this case self-lies. Brooks example of Einsenhower is a poor one. Sometimes righteous anger is exactly what a situation calls for. Would you want a world WITHOUT difficult people, who make people uncomfortable, who stir the pot, who call a spade a spade, who have the courage to blurt out "The Emperor is wearing no clothes!"--the Charlie Hebdos of the world? I know I would not. That doesn't mean we shouldn't work on ourselves in our weak points. We absolutely should. But let's not confuse the ability to make one's fellow man feel-good with moral greatness.
1
Enough! Sentimentality is no substitute for critical thinking.
4
Ah, Mr. Brooks offers us a shiny example of his own "Conscience Leap".
Eliot and Lewes are presented here as enlightened individuals, but according to David's other columns, the poor, especially minorities, are mainly being held back by their moral failures and lack of strong family structures. In fact, according to David, this is the root cause of financial inequality, and most other problems, in America.
Once again, like a good Republican apologist, David recognizes that there are huge differences between what is good for rich and famous white people and what is good for poor minorities.
A truly astounding "Conscience Leap" but no less than what we can always expect from Mr. Brooks.
Eliot and Lewes are presented here as enlightened individuals, but according to David's other columns, the poor, especially minorities, are mainly being held back by their moral failures and lack of strong family structures. In fact, according to David, this is the root cause of financial inequality, and most other problems, in America.
Once again, like a good Republican apologist, David recognizes that there are huge differences between what is good for rich and famous white people and what is good for poor minorities.
A truly astounding "Conscience Leap" but no less than what we can always expect from Mr. Brooks.
6
I have met such people. Indeed I think we all live with some around but may not recognize them. As I look around at seniors especially where there are those with increasing disabilities, I see others looking out for them, helping here and there. Most if not all are past the working years, no longer competing for jobs and careers, just trying to make life work for them and those around them.
This isn't about politics it is more about ones ability to see life as it is in our fellow human being, being present and acting more on the instinct that comes naturally, it seems, to some, less so to others.
This isn't about politics it is more about ones ability to see life as it is in our fellow human being, being present and acting more on the instinct that comes naturally, it seems, to some, less so to others.
"ABOUT once a month I run across a person who radiates an inner light. These people can be in any walk of life. They seem deeply good. They listen well. They make you feel funny and valued. You often catch them looking after other people and as they do so their laugh is musical and their manner is infused with gratitude. They are not thinking about what wonderful work they are doing. They are not thinking about themselves at all."
Never fall in love with your waitress, David.
Never fall in love with your waitress, David.
12
The people Mr. Brooks described are not the norm, but exceptional people. I doubt he meets one a month, especially when you consider the type of people he interacts with on a daily basis.
I can recognize such a person, but I confess I have only met a few of these people in my life and I do not hang around with politicians and other pundits.
I can recognize such a person, but I confess I have only met a few of these people in my life and I do not hang around with politicians and other pundits.
A nice read David, but that's about it. You admit you have achieved a level of success being a paid pundit . Now that your résumé virtues have been achieved you can comfortably and without fear aim for the philosophically and morally higher eulogy virtues. The fact is because you have the time, space and money to do that. Try telling that to a harried mom with minimum wage, trying to hold onto two or three jobs for greedy corporations, or a two paycheck family which just tops the poverty line or all those young graduates with degrees not worth the paper they're on, to the cab-driver who takes you to your fancy restaurants. All these are people trying to keep their bodies to-gether, forget about their souls. They always will be in over-drive résumé mode. They are the mice on a spinning wheel never able to break their stride. So let's get real and stop the eulogy.
13
Very good article. I think there is only one "core" sin -- selfishness. All the other faults, failures, and character defects are the illegitimate step-children of selfishness. Less focus on self means less need to control and more time to think of others. It's not rocket science, but it's awfully hard to do.
1
David, if you want to save your soul, lift other people up. Emotionally, economically, spiritually; support them from below, rather than ruling over them from above. Read Greg Boyd's "Myth of a Christian Nation." And don't worry about people thinking that you are smarter than you really are. Vanitas vanitatum et omnia vanitas. bc
However unpopular with local party apparatchiks, David Brooks is clearly a philosopher as earnest as you'll ever see published in this newspaper. He's written a number of columns over the past couple of years that are evidence of genuine insight and attainment.
Enlightenment is attained by following a path of virtue.
Few people do so but those who do will recognize the signs that mark the sincerity of one on that virtuous path.
None of them are likely to belong to the crowd of money-seekers who've turned a blind eye to perpetual war and crony capitalist abuses of power for cynical political reasons.
George Orwell turned against his companions on the left when the left turned a blind eye to the mass murder of innocents during the communist purges. He took a lot of heat for that at the time.
Where there is light, there is heat...
Enlightenment is attained by following a path of virtue.
Few people do so but those who do will recognize the signs that mark the sincerity of one on that virtuous path.
None of them are likely to belong to the crowd of money-seekers who've turned a blind eye to perpetual war and crony capitalist abuses of power for cynical political reasons.
George Orwell turned against his companions on the left when the left turned a blind eye to the mass murder of innocents during the communist purges. He took a lot of heat for that at the time.
Where there is light, there is heat...
11
Morality from a Republican? Really?
When privation and hunger are "incentives" for the poor, their children, and the elderly, when lowering taxes on the rich is the only means of "balancing" the budget, when war is the best foreign policy, when foreign leaders get more respect than our President, when pollution and global warming take a backseat to profit, when lies about race, immigrants, and women take the place of equality we are shown a stark contrast between Republican policies and morality. It is easy to imagine Brooks telling fairy tales to unsuspecting children than it is to hear another narrative that is so hypocritical.
When privation and hunger are "incentives" for the poor, their children, and the elderly, when lowering taxes on the rich is the only means of "balancing" the budget, when war is the best foreign policy, when foreign leaders get more respect than our President, when pollution and global warming take a backseat to profit, when lies about race, immigrants, and women take the place of equality we are shown a stark contrast between Republican policies and morality. It is easy to imagine Brooks telling fairy tales to unsuspecting children than it is to hear another narrative that is so hypocritical.
47
Or maybe your self-validating assumptions about Republican positions are just plain wrong.
I'll bet not a single one of those kind, generous people with an an inner light who David describes makes assumptions about other folks' morality based on their political party.
I never comment on these things, and I am sure you don't bother with reading peoples' opinions; but, this is a really nice article. Well done, and keep up the good work. I always look forward to your articles.
12
Looks like quite a few people on this board are disparaging the contents of this column for no other reason than they vehemently disagree with the author's personal politics.
Striving to be a better human being is a good thing, isn't it?
Striving to be a better human being is a good thing, isn't it?
452
The problem here is not the contents of the column, nor the author's political bent; rather, that the two are in contradistinction. Mr. Brooks comes off as a hypocrite. Whence the snark and sarcasm.
9
Indeed, but it can be hard work.
Yes, but personal politics, especially for an opinion writer in a major newspaper, is how we express our morality and use it to influence society. One cannot separate the two so easily.
7
I hesitate to comment on such an earnest effort by Mr. Brooks, but I would like to offer a thought on a different direction his inquiry could take. The desire for "self-improvement" seems to be at play here, and that reminds me of a trenchant commentary on this enterprise by the Tibetan Buddhist teacher Chogyam Trungpa, that is summed up by the title of one of his books, "Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism". One of the many ways ego re-insinuates itself into the search for virtue is to cast that search as another accumulation of credentials- spiritual credentials- with which to adorn ego still further. That is a losing game.
So, then, Trungpa: "Enlightenment is ego's ultimate disappointment". Understand that, Mr. Brooks, and I think you understand those wonderful people of whom you speak.
So, then, Trungpa: "Enlightenment is ego's ultimate disappointment". Understand that, Mr. Brooks, and I think you understand those wonderful people of whom you speak.
25
Following in others footsteps seems a bit tantamount to not liking the person you are and not working hard at understanding others as they are in the sense that we all are unique. Everyone has a glow if you see them as individuals. When I visit the supermarket, I always make a point of having discussions w/strangers. Yesterday, it was with a few women (while waiting on line)about the cult of celebrity (and particularly the lies written about some) in the tabloids. They both acknowledged that they were happy not to be one and did not wish to live vicariously through them.Liked to be able to go to a supermarket without being recognized. I learn something every day this way. Seems like you are searching for some true meaning and value outside instead of within. Gotta look inside yourself- that is where you will find it. That is what Max Weber taught me about being a teacher- not imposing your judgments on others. In science, there are moments when one feels like wow, I get it. There is no way one can avoid those moments of individual accomplishment if one is serious about it. And I see nothing wrong w/ sharing what it felt like withoug going into details that would be the book.
I read your columns and think I am reading a sort of sacrificial labor to ingrates, because I can anticipate the sarcastic responses (and sources) without reading the comments.
Your words bring me to two, two-word reponses: Holy Bible and Jesus Christ.
As much as I admire you, this material has all been covered before; but it takes courage for you to write it in this paper.
Soldier on, David. You're a good and decent human being.
Your words bring me to two, two-word reponses: Holy Bible and Jesus Christ.
As much as I admire you, this material has all been covered before; but it takes courage for you to write it in this paper.
Soldier on, David. You're a good and decent human being.
14
You have expressed that which I cannot put into words. Thank you, David Brooks
3
If David is looking for the deeply good people in our society and longs to be like them, why is he a Republican? There are pretty slim pickings in the GOP according to David's list. Egomaniacs like Ted Cruz, cruel disregard for the poor and disadvantaged like Paul Ryan, lack of conscience like Chris Christie, and on and on.
If you take David at his word, what he really wants to be is a Democrat.
If you take David at his word, what he really wants to be is a Democrat.
945
You can't vote your way into personal sanctification, which is essentially what this article is about. Besides, Democrats frequently shun the moral core of life that David Brooks so eloquently defends, so I can't say I believe that either party adequately describes his beliefs.
2
I really do not know what the political affiliation has to do with wanting to better one self ? Seems to me you might want to read the article again and work on being less judgmental ! As a European I having lived here for 30 years , I can only say both parties are very similar on many levels -
Keep Politics out of self improvement or are the kind he is discussing who wants to be recognized???? The US is a country that values Extroverts and disregards introverts ! I see this every day in my work place -public schools ! An introvert maybe one who does wonderful deeds but does not want to be known for it .
Keep Politics out of self improvement or are the kind he is discussing who wants to be recognized???? The US is a country that values Extroverts and disregards introverts ! I see this every day in my work place -public schools ! An introvert maybe one who does wonderful deeds but does not want to be known for it .
4
Thank you for your comment! It serves as refuge for those of us who see David Brooks as one of the most interesting blind spots of our beloved Times, a columnist who manages at once to be intelligent and very self-serving.
A lot of damage has been done during this era in which narcissism is celebrated (and still is, I think, by Brooks). But even those of us who are life-long progressives have to admit the Democratic party hasn't altogether avoided the narcissism that has positively engulfed the political right.
I'd be curious to know how many of us were brought up (I was) to cast our vote for the general good, not for personal interest. For many, this may sound crazy. It was idealistic which is not the way to "get ahead" or make a buck in America!
Oddly, concern for the common good was considered to be conservative at a time before conservative came to mean self-protective and self-centered.
A lot of damage has been done during this era in which narcissism is celebrated (and still is, I think, by Brooks). But even those of us who are life-long progressives have to admit the Democratic party hasn't altogether avoided the narcissism that has positively engulfed the political right.
I'd be curious to know how many of us were brought up (I was) to cast our vote for the general good, not for personal interest. For many, this may sound crazy. It was idealistic which is not the way to "get ahead" or make a buck in America!
Oddly, concern for the common good was considered to be conservative at a time before conservative came to mean self-protective and self-centered.
2
Whenever David Brooks says something wise and true, like that humility is the foundation of morality--only recognition of one's own weak humanity makes real empathy possible, after all--the first response from the commenters is moral superiority that they are among the good, enlightened folk.
Even if saying these things while holding certain conservative beliefs necessarily made him a hypocrite, it would not make what he said in this column wrong. A few readers below might take the lesson before they start touting their own righteousness.
Even if saying these things while holding certain conservative beliefs necessarily made him a hypocrite, it would not make what he said in this column wrong. A few readers below might take the lesson before they start touting their own righteousness.
12
Thank you for one of the best editorials I have ever read. I'm inspired to do more for others beginning tomorrow morning.
8
Catherine: Why delay?
Why wait? Why not right now?
TO PURSUE ONE'S BLISS AS JOSEPH CAMPBELL SAID . . .
...is most important. And to achieve this transcendent state one must be honest -- especially concerning one's self.
And, be cognizant of one's undeniable mortality. I have met many people who are long gone and the ones I most remember are the men and women not for their world accomplishments... But, their sensitivity and kindness which they seemed to exude including a lack of self involvement.
Natural.
And, one's bliss will be spread to many others.
...is most important. And to achieve this transcendent state one must be honest -- especially concerning one's self.
And, be cognizant of one's undeniable mortality. I have met many people who are long gone and the ones I most remember are the men and women not for their world accomplishments... But, their sensitivity and kindness which they seemed to exude including a lack of self involvement.
Natural.
And, one's bliss will be spread to many others.
3
Yes, David, we write our epitaphs every day, but the point is how we live our lives now, not how we're spoken of posthumously. And being truly magnanimous is done for its own sake, not for our elegies. So stop thinking of our loved ones wearing funeral shrouds and try to make them smile today!
15
You mean so well, but (and you knew there would be a "but"), you slide so easily from honesty to preaching. My wish for you would be that you deepen your ability to journey inward and resist turning each little flash of insight into a sermon.
35
I just finished reading one of the most uplifting, encouraging, beautiful columns i have ever read in the NY Times. Certainly, i thought, nobody can drag Brooks through the coals for this one. Except for the first 3 comments the other 3 have. So Brooks was born rich, a silver spoon in his mouth. Did he have any say in that? He is no more responsible for that than some one born into poverty. Is he going to give up his riches, his position, and go live among the poor? No, and neither are the usual naysayers even if all they have are their computers, a subscription to the Times, 3 squares a day.. We can work on his politics, but give the guy a break.
I have known only a few people in my long life who seem to glow with this inner light and fortitude. With one exception, these few people are homeless or near so. These few people are also the people who work with the very poor. They have it. I don't. The other person was my Geology Professor who radiated that special something.
Thank you David Brooks for a beautiful, wise essay. And may i say God bless.
Maybe you could consider becoming an Independent?
I have known only a few people in my long life who seem to glow with this inner light and fortitude. With one exception, these few people are homeless or near so. These few people are also the people who work with the very poor. They have it. I don't. The other person was my Geology Professor who radiated that special something.
Thank you David Brooks for a beautiful, wise essay. And may i say God bless.
Maybe you could consider becoming an Independent?
55
Very well said - we live in a society that is very judgmental and the Internet has helped this process ! They surely would not be as critical in person !!!
1
How about Compassion as a life virtue! It would substitute for internships and exotic experiences? Begin with children. Volunteer the family with the homeless, soup kitchen. Teach CHILDREN how to use their privileged status to help others. Do not be a holiday giver! I leave the local meal center during Thanksgiving and Christmas when the once a year volunteer appears. Compassion is the answer.
14
In an ancient Hebrew text, compassion is another word for God!
Thank you for sharing your insights about yourself.
But perhaps you will need to become a Democrat or at least stand up to your Party before you can achieve this truly caring attitude you crave. Good luck in your quest.
But perhaps you will need to become a Democrat or at least stand up to your Party before you can achieve this truly caring attitude you crave. Good luck in your quest.
53
Demko gets it almost right. This column helps explain why real conservatives don't believe that Brooks is one of them. American conservatism today has become a synonym for Social Darwinism. Brooks ain't no Social Darwinist. He marries the fading tradition of 18th-century Enlightenment liberalism and 19th-century utopian socialism. He celebrates community and generosity, not greed. One of these days, he'll emerge from his ideological closet.
201
Riveting column. This was a hit for me.
14
Almost never is the virtue of doing good be attributed to people whom we recognize because of fame, fortune, notoriety, or self promotion, or because their name is the name on a charity.
I have noticed over my lifetime that those who truly act to perform good works don't think of that as a goal, but as something they know how to do. They have no expectation of being thought of as good people. I think, but cannot be certain, that such people are genuinely humble and live lives that reflect that humility. Sometimes, they practice self-deprecation. They don't purport to have the solutino but act only in aid of the problem's solution and are spurred to do their work-not necessarily to excel in their work-by self examination.
But mostly, the goodness those people exude seems to come naturally to them. They don't seem to work at it-it is as though what they are do is a natural extension of some other part of their being. I read once about a hospital orderly subjected to criticism of the hospital room's cleanliness by a relative of a dying patient, even though the orderly made special effort only moments before to clean that room. The orderly listened, apologized to the critic and cleaned the room again without responding because, in his words, he felt the sadness the critic was experiencing.
I will remember, however, Dwight Eisenhower's trick for dealing with those he loathed. It will be helpful (and humbling) during the political season which now seems to be upon us.
I have noticed over my lifetime that those who truly act to perform good works don't think of that as a goal, but as something they know how to do. They have no expectation of being thought of as good people. I think, but cannot be certain, that such people are genuinely humble and live lives that reflect that humility. Sometimes, they practice self-deprecation. They don't purport to have the solutino but act only in aid of the problem's solution and are spurred to do their work-not necessarily to excel in their work-by self examination.
But mostly, the goodness those people exude seems to come naturally to them. They don't seem to work at it-it is as though what they are do is a natural extension of some other part of their being. I read once about a hospital orderly subjected to criticism of the hospital room's cleanliness by a relative of a dying patient, even though the orderly made special effort only moments before to clean that room. The orderly listened, apologized to the critic and cleaned the room again without responding because, in his words, he felt the sadness the critic was experiencing.
I will remember, however, Dwight Eisenhower's trick for dealing with those he loathed. It will be helpful (and humbling) during the political season which now seems to be upon us.
6
Ignored totally is the fact that the resume self is all that counts in today's make a buck at all costs corporatocracy.
Try any of this touchy-feely stuff in today's workplace (which, with technology today, is actually 18-20 hours long) and see how quickly doors close.
Try any of this touchy-feely stuff in today's workplace (which, with technology today, is actually 18-20 hours long) and see how quickly doors close.
32
On the contrary, he addresses that in paragraph 4.
No, not really, he doesn't.
I think that is what he is saying. The person transcends. And that means choices made that go against the corporate grain.
The one thing I know about genuinely kind and generous people is that their kindness and generosity usually rubs off on others. This has been true of everyone I’ve met and known who has had these characteristics. The natural response, for me anyway, has been to imitate what’s best in them.
A prominent theme of the Sermon on the Mount is that we should love not only those who love us, but also those who don’t care for us and do us wrong and even take advantage of us. We’re to give freely without expecting anything in return. The reason to do this, of course, is that our love will rub off on others. Okay, so not everyone will be so moved, but even if they reject our gentle prodding it will be worth the effort. It will spread.
It seems that David’s search for goodness is hindered by a “chicken or an egg” analysis. It is enough that goodness simply exists. All we have to do is tap into it.
A prominent theme of the Sermon on the Mount is that we should love not only those who love us, but also those who don’t care for us and do us wrong and even take advantage of us. We’re to give freely without expecting anything in return. The reason to do this, of course, is that our love will rub off on others. Okay, so not everyone will be so moved, but even if they reject our gentle prodding it will be worth the effort. It will spread.
It seems that David’s search for goodness is hindered by a “chicken or an egg” analysis. It is enough that goodness simply exists. All we have to do is tap into it.
153
Those who are not good, I also treat as good.
In so doing I gain in goodness.
-- Lao Tzu
In so doing I gain in goodness.
-- Lao Tzu
Brooks has a thoughtful, profound piece, and ironically many of his regular, reactionary commenters seem to be some of the unhappy, unexamined people he alludes to. They are those who are perpetually lost on a horizontal, material plain that goes no higher than politics, and who desperately need perennial scapegoats for a world that will always be imperfect.
24
This is a thoughtful column that, I think, reflects the deepest aspirations of many of us. When I was in high school in Utah, I knew a young man who radiated that inner light that Mr. Brooks is talking about. His name was Steve Agbor, and his family had emigrated from Nigeria. Steve was very gifted in just about every conceivable way, but more than anything he was absolutely magnetic: everyone seemed to be drawn to him. The strange thing was, although he was the most popular person at my high school, he didn't look down on anyone. I heard him say once that every human being on earth had something to teach him. His humility was his greatest strength. I've lost touch with him over the years, but I have no doubt that he still lets that light shine. I would be truly successful if I could do the same.
18
.
Don't worry about your soul, David. Just pay your electric bill.
Don't worry about your soul, David. Just pay your electric bill.
3
Well done. I will save this one. Thanks, David.
11
Lots of bombast and hokum from Mr. Brooks. Most of us are just trying to muddle through our lives, Mr. Brooks, without your moral certainties. We would like to radiate inner light too, but circumstances prevent it. How can you radiate inner light when you struggle just to provide shelter and food for your children, when you realize that a college education for your children is as unattainable as a trip to Mars, when you understand that old age and retirement just mean destitution or, when you run from a policeman and are shot five times in the back because you have the wrong skin color? But, Mr. Brooks, I wish you well on your journey of moral improvement. Maybe you can impart some wisdom to the hatemongers in your party, but I doubt that their inner five watt bulbs would ever switch on.
48
Stop hating every minute of your life. Stop your envious focus on what others have that you don't. Stop thinking about every terrible thing that has happened and anticipating every terrible thing that will happen. Surely something nice happened today and is happening that you have overlooked. Stop putting such a high value on things you don't have and a low value on what you have. Switching on your inner light may mean switching off your nasty, grumbling self, and paying attention.
I liked your comment but give Brooks a break.
rajeeva, reading of your struggle to keep life positive seems to be a heavy burden. Negativity in attitude actually prevents you from moving through life with a positive spirit. The point is how to work with the circumstance of life. Keeping it simple. There are three things that work well and they are not new. One, love everyone and yourself; two, moderation in how you live. Desiring what others have is ruinous to the spirit. So you many not see college, but people need services. The NYT had a story about a young person became a welder, makes six figures and travels worldwide for his company; three,humility of person. People are grow weary of hearing negatives. You are potentially who you can become. David's points make that clear....
This is probably wasted on most here, but it is not what you are doing that matters, it is what you are being while you are about the doing.
Thank you Mr. Brooks, you will take many hits for this column, but keep it up, I think you are on the right track (for whatever that's worth).
Thank you Mr. Brooks, you will take many hits for this column, but keep it up, I think you are on the right track (for whatever that's worth).
9
Autotelic persuits create the greatest psychic energy and most fulfilling outcomes for everyone.
I recommend Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's book "Flow" -The psychology of optimizing experience which is so lacking in most people's lives and produces the malaise and psychic entropy so ubiquitous in our society.
I recommend Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's book "Flow" -The psychology of optimizing experience which is so lacking in most people's lives and produces the malaise and psychic entropy so ubiquitous in our society.
4
David Brooks is one of the few wise men of our times. Our Hearts are restless.... he speaks so often to this situation and he brings light and guidance. I cannot thank him enough for the gifts (like this piece) that he brings to my sojourn here on this planet.
8
Sanctimony is not to be confused with virtue, nor verbosity with depth.
Jesus spoke in parables for a reason.
When someone asked Rabbi Hillel to expound the essence of torah while standing on one foot, he replied" Do not to to others what you would not have done to you. All the rest is commentary". The Golden Rule is the same idea expressed as a positive injunction.
There is commentary, and then there is obfuscation.
Jesus spoke in parables for a reason.
When someone asked Rabbi Hillel to expound the essence of torah while standing on one foot, he replied" Do not to to others what you would not have done to you. All the rest is commentary". The Golden Rule is the same idea expressed as a positive injunction.
There is commentary, and then there is obfuscation.
11
Indeed. What would the world look like if we prioritized community, global thoughtfulness and respect, service, and integrity over monetization? Our shared mentors and heroes who embody this spirit show up in our lives over and over -- monthly for you, David, as you note -- and yet still we make decisions and accusations on what works for "me," and blame "them" for the ills that befall.
It matters not, ultimately, our political affiliations or leanings. What matters is we love the other, that is, when we accept the other as legitimate with no obligations or judgement, that we find those of whom you -- and all of us -- admire and aspire to be. It's love that defines our humanness. Love, biologically (see Humberto Maturana), is at the core of what makes us thrive, and let's us truly answer the question, "how will my intrinsic talent be matched with the needs of the world."
It matters not, ultimately, our political affiliations or leanings. What matters is we love the other, that is, when we accept the other as legitimate with no obligations or judgement, that we find those of whom you -- and all of us -- admire and aspire to be. It's love that defines our humanness. Love, biologically (see Humberto Maturana), is at the core of what makes us thrive, and let's us truly answer the question, "how will my intrinsic talent be matched with the needs of the world."
5
I hesitate to comment on such an earnest effort by Mr. Brooks, but I would like to offer a thought on a different direction his inquiry could take. The desire for "self-improvement" seems to be at play here, and that reminds me of a trenchant commentary on this enterprise by the Tibetan Buddhist teacher Chogyam Trugpa, that is summed up by the title of one of his books, "Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism". One of the many ways ego re-insinuates itself into the search for virtue is to cast that search as another accumulation of credentials- spiritual credentials- with which to adorn ego still further. That is a losing game.
So, then, Trungpa: "Enlightenment is ego's ultimate disappointment". Understand that, Mr. Brooks, and I think you understand those wonderful people of whom you speak.
So, then, Trungpa: "Enlightenment is ego's ultimate disappointment". Understand that, Mr. Brooks, and I think you understand those wonderful people of whom you speak.
16
With enlightenment, ego disintegrates. There is no disappointment...
1
Thank you for your observation, JohnG, and for mentioning this wise book.
Earnestness is fine by me.
1
This coming Thursday at 11 a.m. eastern time, David Brooks will be on the Diane Rehm show on National Public Radio to talk about a book of his ("The Road to Character") which will be released this coming Tuesday and which appears to deal in more depth with the theme of this column. Here is a link to the announcement of the radio program:
http://thedianerehmshow.org/shows/2015-04-16/david-brooks-the-road-to-ch...
Dorothy Day tried to help the poor through her Catholic Worker movement. The Republicans, whom David Brooks generally supports, want to get rid just about all government assistance to the poor while private resources like Dorothy Day's that exist to help the poor are overwhelmed with the problems. That is quite a contrast! Maybe in a future column or in his book or when he is interviewed, Mr. Brooks will explain why he is a conservative.
http://thedianerehmshow.org/shows/2015-04-16/david-brooks-the-road-to-ch...
Dorothy Day tried to help the poor through her Catholic Worker movement. The Republicans, whom David Brooks generally supports, want to get rid just about all government assistance to the poor while private resources like Dorothy Day's that exist to help the poor are overwhelmed with the problems. That is quite a contrast! Maybe in a future column or in his book or when he is interviewed, Mr. Brooks will explain why he is a conservative.
44
David, you are America's rabbi. Isn't that enough for anyone's moral bucket list?
How can Mr. Brooks write this column when his pro Israel stance flies in the face of how Israel treats the Palestinians.
31
I think Pope Francis could be added to this list. He has been an inspiration to Catholics and people of all faiths. He is selfless and caring and has humility beyond most. People are in awe of him and I certainly am. He has mingled with the poor and socialized with the forgotten. He is a credit to the Catholic Church and more of us should follow his example. He is a beam of light for the world.
16
"When I do good I feel good. When I do bad I feel bad. That's my religion." Abraham Lincoln
68
"The stumbler doesn’t build her life by being better than others, but by being better than she used to be."
This column is too theoretical for my tastes. All I know is my own experience which is this: overcoming a life challenge early on, and becoming part of a movement whereby one's salvation is contingent on helping others achieve the same success, has been tantamount to a relatively happy life.
Somewhere around mid-life it dawned on me that the greatest achievements I will ever be able to count as such aren't the jobs, or any professional accolades, any salary level, or even the strength of my family (I'm unmarried and childless). Rather, it's the number of people I've been able to help overcome some inner demons like those I experienced in m 30s. It's a basic instinct for kindness and generosity of spirit that accounts for the light of happiness Mr. Brooks describes in his opening lines when portraying a friend who exuded true happiness.
Inner contentment for me has been realizing my limits and trying to help others see the same, as well as building a self that's "better than before."
This column is too theoretical for my tastes. All I know is my own experience which is this: overcoming a life challenge early on, and becoming part of a movement whereby one's salvation is contingent on helping others achieve the same success, has been tantamount to a relatively happy life.
Somewhere around mid-life it dawned on me that the greatest achievements I will ever be able to count as such aren't the jobs, or any professional accolades, any salary level, or even the strength of my family (I'm unmarried and childless). Rather, it's the number of people I've been able to help overcome some inner demons like those I experienced in m 30s. It's a basic instinct for kindness and generosity of spirit that accounts for the light of happiness Mr. Brooks describes in his opening lines when portraying a friend who exuded true happiness.
Inner contentment for me has been realizing my limits and trying to help others see the same, as well as building a self that's "better than before."
248
Thank you for taking the time to write this.
2
We miss the point when we fire criticism and labeling at David Brooks. This column has meaning for us all if we take the opportunity to self-reflect. I have been soul sickened by the lack of respect for our leaders and our fellow citizens in the hateful belittling speech we choose instead of intelligent, idea oriented conversation about our fellows, laws, authorities, and institutions. Maybe, if we could all just for one week, seek to be the positive, respecting element in relationships, opinions, efforts, and laws, we could see a vast ocean of change towards our own moral good. It is the weak of heart, soul, and mind which spews animosity, contempt and dehumanization on our fellows.
742
@teacher
At first I was so repulsed by the venom I saw on Social Media that I wanted nothing to do with it...but I changed my mind. Instead I now try to moderate hate comments. I strive not to lecture but to offer insight.
I also find folks who are really hurting (There's my health care provider coming through!) in youtube comments. I happened on a youtube video where celebrities were eulogizing Robin Williams. A guy with barely decipherable writing was saying how he could see the times when Robin seemed to grow quiet as if depression was taking over his personality. That's when Robin would really come out with a great comedic line...causing all to laugh around him. This commenter then went on how he felt so depressed that he didn't see the reason to go on living...but he then talked about having sung in a rock 'n roll band, had refurbished a boat and rebuilt a motorcycle. He needed someone to say that he mattered..that he was just also important.
I responded with the most positive comments I could...focusing on HIM. I wrote that most of us only dreamed of being a front man in a band...that he was a decidedly unique person. We went back and forth and I could see his emotions lightening.
It's too easy to just slam someone--it takes no talent to write something cruel to a stranger while "hiding" behind a screen name. Sometimes I wish we had censored speech but speech should aways be free.
So I just remember Gandhi-"Be the change you wish to see in the world."
At first I was so repulsed by the venom I saw on Social Media that I wanted nothing to do with it...but I changed my mind. Instead I now try to moderate hate comments. I strive not to lecture but to offer insight.
I also find folks who are really hurting (There's my health care provider coming through!) in youtube comments. I happened on a youtube video where celebrities were eulogizing Robin Williams. A guy with barely decipherable writing was saying how he could see the times when Robin seemed to grow quiet as if depression was taking over his personality. That's when Robin would really come out with a great comedic line...causing all to laugh around him. This commenter then went on how he felt so depressed that he didn't see the reason to go on living...but he then talked about having sung in a rock 'n roll band, had refurbished a boat and rebuilt a motorcycle. He needed someone to say that he mattered..that he was just also important.
I responded with the most positive comments I could...focusing on HIM. I wrote that most of us only dreamed of being a front man in a band...that he was a decidedly unique person. We went back and forth and I could see his emotions lightening.
It's too easy to just slam someone--it takes no talent to write something cruel to a stranger while "hiding" behind a screen name. Sometimes I wish we had censored speech but speech should aways be free.
So I just remember Gandhi-"Be the change you wish to see in the world."
2
Your point is beautifully expressed and most compelling. It seems we are missing out on the extraordinary power that comes with collective goodness. That said, I think many of Mr. Brooks' readers are frustrated that he can support policies diametrically opposed to enlightenment, support of community, and, frankly, morals.
I hope you, Teacherinvt, keep teaching!!
I hope you, Teacherinvt, keep teaching!!
1
I don't often agree with you, but this is one of your best articles. The person who wrote this article is a thoughtful, compassionate man. Can you persuade your conservative friends to read this article?
43
And there you go, David!
Denying this liberal lion the opportunity of gleefully posting some superficial snarky response of the type that will undoubtedly flood in response to this sensitive, well written piece.
I will also be forced to purchase your book, and (hopefully) understand and learn from the important lessons contained within.
Thank you for ruining my morning...
Denying this liberal lion the opportunity of gleefully posting some superficial snarky response of the type that will undoubtedly flood in response to this sensitive, well written piece.
I will also be forced to purchase your book, and (hopefully) understand and learn from the important lessons contained within.
Thank you for ruining my morning...
23
You can make a buck doing what you do but your willingness to associate your philosophy of life with the anti middle class racists of the right will forever thwart your efforts to become what you describe in this piece. Unfortunately it is the juxtaposition of these opposing philosophies that defeats you. I have read much of what write with some admiration of the sentiments but some how I can never reconcile them with the people whose fews you represent.
56
"Eulogy virtues" what an interesting way of saying how we live our lives on earth will define our legacy for eternity. Who wants to be remembered for their money, anger, or intolerance or do they want to be remembered for being kind, generous and tolerant? Do we want to be remembered as ruthless and self serving or considerate and encouraging. Unfortunately we will not be here to be witness to what will be said of us during our eulogy,that is unfortunate because those are the virtues that will be our legacy.
2
Good luck Mr. Brooks and thank you for the edifying read.
8
Too bad you can't convince the GOP to be more like this, David.
38
David,
I guess you are here to be pummeled given the nature of your job and gauging the above comments.
This is one of your best articles and I've read many. It goes beyond cleverness or even the attempt to be wise. It goes to the bone which at this moment I'd rather not put into a politicized frame. I'd rather simply accept what you say as a reflection of your journeying.
I guess you are here to be pummeled given the nature of your job and gauging the above comments.
This is one of your best articles and I've read many. It goes beyond cleverness or even the attempt to be wise. It goes to the bone which at this moment I'd rather not put into a politicized frame. I'd rather simply accept what you say as a reflection of your journeying.
121
Look toward your Republican friends and then do the opposite. Anger, opposition, power, greed, selfishness, are not helpful traits unless they are directed to helping the less fortunate. Supporting tax cuts for the very wealthy is just one example. Taking away social security and medicare as it is today and going private is another example. Not considering peaceful options in the Middle East is a third option.
Love your neighbor as yourself goes a long way. By the way, your neighbor includes a healthy earth, the inner city, and people of all races, creeds, sexual orientation, sex, etc. Examine your ideas. I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.
Love your neighbor as yourself goes a long way. By the way, your neighbor includes a healthy earth, the inner city, and people of all races, creeds, sexual orientation, sex, etc. Examine your ideas. I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.
1001
Anger, opposition and certainly power can be used for good purpose, but greed and selfishness? I can't see how these can lead to any positive end. Re Republicans--you omit the example of racist hatred, and vilification of the President and spiteful obstruction of anything worthwhile he does or tries to do
solely to deny him any accomplishment and place in history. Has Mr. Brooks ever addressed this shameful behavior with the fellow members of his party?
solely to deny him any accomplishment and place in history. Has Mr. Brooks ever addressed this shameful behavior with the fellow members of his party?
2
Cut David Brooks a break guys. This is good writing that we all can benefit from.
100
This may indeed be good writing as you say, Scout. But knowing the context and background of the author more fully reveals it to be utter hypocrisy - or worse.
And THAT is precisely what so many posters are pointing out here. They'd be more than happy to "cut David Brooks a break" if he did indeed begin to actually practice what he preaches in this particular column. Alas none of us are holding our breath.
And THAT is precisely what so many posters are pointing out here. They'd be more than happy to "cut David Brooks a break" if he did indeed begin to actually practice what he preaches in this particular column. Alas none of us are holding our breath.
2
David,
You are already on your way, considering the insights you share here. What may be hardest on the path for you, given your intellectual stature, is simply to forget yourself as others see you. Don't examine yourself so much; reach out to those you admire and emulate what you see in small ways.
You are already on your way, considering the insights you share here. What may be hardest on the path for you, given your intellectual stature, is simply to forget yourself as others see you. Don't examine yourself so much; reach out to those you admire and emulate what you see in small ways.
5
Worthy of reading twice or three times
17
Thanks, David. This is a thoughtful piece that rises above the political turmoil of the moment. I wonder where it will take you and your readers. I will come back to it every now and again, I believe.
13
Please, Mr. Brooks, get your Republican pals to read and sign on to this philosophy and tear up their pledge to Grover Norquist.
200
"It occurs to me that I’ve achieved a decent level of career success, but I have not achieved that. I have not achieved that generosity of spirit, or that depth of character.
A few years ago I realized that I wanted to be a bit more like those people. I realized that if I wanted to do that I was going to have to work harder to save my own soul."
Yeesh. The lack of irony is strong in this one. :) Being a good person is not about your soul, Mr. Brooks. It's not about you 24/7. It means caring about others and helping them. It's about doing good, not giving lip-service to being good. It's about standing up for what's just and right. That's how you achieve generosity and character. Until you understand that, all of the moralizing in the world won't help.
A few years ago I realized that I wanted to be a bit more like those people. I realized that if I wanted to do that I was going to have to work harder to save my own soul."
Yeesh. The lack of irony is strong in this one. :) Being a good person is not about your soul, Mr. Brooks. It's not about you 24/7. It means caring about others and helping them. It's about doing good, not giving lip-service to being good. It's about standing up for what's just and right. That's how you achieve generosity and character. Until you understand that, all of the moralizing in the world won't help.
83
Much of what you speak of comes ftom good parening. As a parent, who you are and how one lives ones life has more impact on your child than what you say or what you do for a living.
A while back Mr. Brooks wrote an article about building character is part of succeeding in school. The same is true about life.... http://lstrn.us/1sZgBD0
A while back Mr. Brooks wrote an article about building character is part of succeeding in school. The same is true about life.... http://lstrn.us/1sZgBD0
4
Become a Liberal.
85
Enough of Mr. Brooks' petty moralizing. Who is he to tell us what is and is not an acceptable way to live? "Life is a process of commitment making?" Good lord, who wants that?
5
I sincerely hope you are successful in your endeavor. And I further hope you will share with us how you did it. By "us", I mean people like me who are in need of a similar "bucket list". Good luck.
4
You might note that not one of the people you profess to admire would ever consider judging anyone. That is the true measure of humility, to never even consider addressing the shortcomings of others.
19
They don't judge the people but do judge the action.
3
I would add that the acknowledgement of the freely given gifts received throughout life with a sense of continual gratitude should be included. From the moment we are born until the day we die, we are dependent upon others and should never forget that. When we accept that premise, it enables us to more easily step outside of ourselves and develop the traits that a thriving society needs: compassion, and respect of and service to others.
471
"But people on the road to inner light do not find their vocations by asking, what do I want from life? They ask, what is life asking of me?"
This is a transparent variation of JFK's famous line which itself is an adaptation of an older version.
Let me give you another version: There are two kinds of people, the 'wherever' and the 'whenever.' The first kind (wherever) make people happy wherever they go; the second kind (whenever) make people happy whenever they go. Moral: try to be wherever rather than whenever type.
This is a transparent variation of JFK's famous line which itself is an adaptation of an older version.
Let me give you another version: There are two kinds of people, the 'wherever' and the 'whenever.' The first kind (wherever) make people happy wherever they go; the second kind (whenever) make people happy whenever they go. Moral: try to be wherever rather than whenever type.
7
Deeply insightful powerful and inspiring article.
Perfectly describes the underpinnings of the start of a spiritual journey.
Should read at every graduation ceremony.
Perfectly describes the underpinnings of the start of a spiritual journey.
Should read at every graduation ceremony.
2
Classic David Brooks: a great essay. Thank you David.
2
A beautiful essay from Brooks. At a certain point, the sweet sounds of the sirens luring you to worldly success turn into a harpy cacophony of endless demands on your time and life. If you're rash enough, or angry enough, or have just enough childhood delight in life left you, enough that is to cast out the harpy/sirens, there's an agonizing quiet as they scurry off but take away the charms of success while they're at it. Yet so what? It turns out the silence they leave behind is a wonderful place to remember a life you once imagined. And then to go out and live it.
5
Mr Brooks: it's actually quite simple. The people you admire take a strong moral stand - not a prevaricating one, not a fence-sitting one, but they say what needs to be said regardless of the opprobrium that inevitably will fall on them from the ones who try to please everyone. In times of national crisis, which the U.S. is nearing in my view, such people are more valuable than ever. It is good that you glimpse their value as they are an inspiration to all of us.
5
The people David loves to celebrate here are called Christians, and certain parts of the country are full of them. They aren't perfect by any stretch, but they know the way of this world and have seen that there is a better choice and a better way to spend this life while here.
There may be a non-Christian who is also humble, but should you catch one you may well find him or her to be surrounded by Believers. Funny how that works. But at least this is one bit of elightenment that no hinest writer can force into anything political.
There may be a non-Christian who is also humble, but should you catch one you may well find him or her to be surrounded by Believers. Funny how that works. But at least this is one bit of elightenment that no hinest writer can force into anything political.
Matthew 6:1-5. It helps me and I do not believe.
Humility is not restricted to Christians, nor to people who associate with Christians.
20
Steve, I know you mean well, but please...
There are no small number of Christians whose souls are filled with hate and use the Bible to exalt themselves as believers in religious "values," then condemn and shun others. (Like those who justify discriminating against gay people and ignore Jesus' Golden Rule) And there are MANY humble and decent people who have come by those values on their own without the benefit of religion or via other faiths; they do no need to be "surrounded" by Believers.
I am not attacking Christianity, because just about EVERY religion has used their faith to abuse (and sadly, very often murder) "non-believers." I am no longer a believer in organized religion because of this; I try (and often not succeed, but I keep trying) to embody humility and empathy in my everyday life because I feel we are all One, not just with each other, but with every atom of the entire cosmos.
There are no small number of Christians whose souls are filled with hate and use the Bible to exalt themselves as believers in religious "values," then condemn and shun others. (Like those who justify discriminating against gay people and ignore Jesus' Golden Rule) And there are MANY humble and decent people who have come by those values on their own without the benefit of religion or via other faiths; they do no need to be "surrounded" by Believers.
I am not attacking Christianity, because just about EVERY religion has used their faith to abuse (and sadly, very often murder) "non-believers." I am no longer a believer in organized religion because of this; I try (and often not succeed, but I keep trying) to embody humility and empathy in my everyday life because I feel we are all One, not just with each other, but with every atom of the entire cosmos.
9
Yearning for something beyond mere success or accomplishment, beyond the conventional goals shouting at us from a tender age... This gets at the moral dilemma of our self-centered, cult of the individual, present. Brooks eloquently speaks to this in a very natural and human way, in a voice devoid of the shrill political posturing that deafens the the listening ear and provides a self-depicting way to find our own navigation toward a better self.
6
My first impression on reading this was that I hope DB reads and internalizes the current NYT editorial on the GOP campaign of denigration of Obama. (I might hope, for DB's sake, that he had actually written it, but I try to compartmentalize fantasy in my life.)
If Brooks really wants virtue, he should disassociate from the vile attacks on Obama and other Democrats. Focus on policy, David, and tell us why you remain silent in the midst of such vice-filled activity--and not just because you support Israel.
Then, when I came to the part where DB describes job skills as virtues, I gagged and gave up.
If Brooks really wants virtue, he should disassociate from the vile attacks on Obama and other Democrats. Focus on policy, David, and tell us why you remain silent in the midst of such vice-filled activity--and not just because you support Israel.
Then, when I came to the part where DB describes job skills as virtues, I gagged and gave up.
88
Yes, Mr. Brooks. You have a lot of power in Republican circles. How about using some of it for good?
1
You mean you don't think the job skill of writing partisan, divisive, polemic is a virtue?
1
Keep writing patronizing lectures to gay people about how we should suck up discrimination. That ought to help you "radiate light."
47
David, This must be one of the best pieces you have ever written. "The stumbler doesn't build her life by being better than others, but by being better than she used to be." I opened a notebook to add that sentence my collection of quotations. The first quotation on the first page is from Paul Tillich: "The passion fro truth is silenced by answers which than the weight of undisputed authority." And the second is "It is the loss of freedom to change that marks the beginning of the neurotic process." Lawrence Kabie
4
"There’s joy in freely chosen obedience to organizations, ideas and people."
Dear David, I'll help you along. Your core moral weakness is your penchant for authoritarianism. Work on it.
Dear David, I'll help you along. Your core moral weakness is your penchant for authoritarianism. Work on it.
207
Um, I think maybe he was talking about devotion to organizations that are our societal glue... Suggest reading, "Bowling Alone." Why turn everything into an opportunity to bash the essayist?
Item one on the moral bucket list: Walk away from the GOP. Give me one actual name of a spiritually advanced person who supports, say, Ted Cruz. Just not going to happen.
570
I like Ted Cruz. But then, I don't claim to be a spiritually advanced person, certainly not on the exalted level of NYT commenters.
9
Confusing necessary and sufficient, i suspect.
5
The question was 'supports' not 'likes'.
2
Another wonderful column, David. Late in life I have realised two things: it's basically all about relationships, and it's a practice. Without relationships we are lost. And in order to develop the inner qualities we need for strong, deep relationships, we need daily practice. Several times every day we need to notice beauty, express gratitude, and smile at a stranger. Sometimes they smile back.
61
"Without relationships we are lost." Excellent comment on tribalism.
1
Brooks is correct here. He could even do it for himself.
He'd have to choose between what he fully understands is moral, and being the Republican extolling selfishness that he is.
He'd have to choose between what he fully understands is moral, and being the Republican extolling selfishness that he is.
298
I really don't understand you at all, David Brooks.
You profess to want to do good. You say you are merely a pundit. But pundits help shape public opinion and you are a pundit for one of the most powerful publications in the world. Your position puts you on talk show and panels, where you are able to spread your opinion widely.
You reference Eisenhower, Day, and Perkins. Earlier this week you wrote a glowing article about Lincoln and his leadership qualities.
How in the world are you a Republican when you admire these kinds of people, people who were progressive, open-minded, people who made government and society a better place, people who spoke out against injustice and business, and warned about the military industrial complex.
Speak out against the nasty right, the tea party conservatives, the chicken hawks, the anti-regulators, the union busters, the "Don't Tread on Me" crowd who stomp on the rights of women, the oligarchy, the 1%, the bankers who never went to jail after causing the fiscal disaster of 2008, the Christians who bash gays, the rich who refuse to raise the minimum wage, the overwhelming incarceration of blacks, the NRA thugs who won't allow us to regulate at all even after children are massacred, Citizens United, the disaster of global warming, the voter suppression of minorities by the right, the lack of equal pay for equal work for women, the disastrous invasion of Iraq.
Start here and maybe this will make you into the person you want to be.
You profess to want to do good. You say you are merely a pundit. But pundits help shape public opinion and you are a pundit for one of the most powerful publications in the world. Your position puts you on talk show and panels, where you are able to spread your opinion widely.
You reference Eisenhower, Day, and Perkins. Earlier this week you wrote a glowing article about Lincoln and his leadership qualities.
How in the world are you a Republican when you admire these kinds of people, people who were progressive, open-minded, people who made government and society a better place, people who spoke out against injustice and business, and warned about the military industrial complex.
Speak out against the nasty right, the tea party conservatives, the chicken hawks, the anti-regulators, the union busters, the "Don't Tread on Me" crowd who stomp on the rights of women, the oligarchy, the 1%, the bankers who never went to jail after causing the fiscal disaster of 2008, the Christians who bash gays, the rich who refuse to raise the minimum wage, the overwhelming incarceration of blacks, the NRA thugs who won't allow us to regulate at all even after children are massacred, Citizens United, the disaster of global warming, the voter suppression of minorities by the right, the lack of equal pay for equal work for women, the disastrous invasion of Iraq.
Start here and maybe this will make you into the person you want to be.
2659
Perhaps Brooks is a Republican because Republicans donate both time and money to charitable causes than Democrats do (as confirmed by Kristof a few years ago). The question is, why are Democrats so stingy when the profess to care so much?
11
Maybe by speaking out in this amazing essay, he may make others look deeper into their values that will facilitate positive change. I would like to read something for its truth, instead of always thinking "party". Kind and thoughtful article which I appreciate deeply. Planting seeds of kindness...that is how I see it.
12
AMEN!
Though it is selfish and callous of them I understand the rich Republicans who want to protect their money. But what about the poor ones in that party? Why do they vote against their own self interest?
Though it is selfish and callous of them I understand the rich Republicans who want to protect their money. But what about the poor ones in that party? Why do they vote against their own self interest?
10
With you examples here, you answer your own question, Mr. Brooks. It is simple: change your life! Do something else!
I would imagine that as a pundit (as you note), your days are full of reading, writing, appearing, arguing (or pretending to argue), and so forth. How much engaged interaction do you have with others? What problems are you working with them to solve? How much time do you spend listening?
Making smart distinctions and coming up with examples is one thing. Doing something about it is another!
I would imagine that as a pundit (as you note), your days are full of reading, writing, appearing, arguing (or pretending to argue), and so forth. How much engaged interaction do you have with others? What problems are you working with them to solve? How much time do you spend listening?
Making smart distinctions and coming up with examples is one thing. Doing something about it is another!
101
I think it could be argued that David IS doing something but writing articles like this to get RDeanB, myself, and others to think along these lines. Thanks David.
1
Influencing thousands of people like yourself to do good is who David wrote for.
How about unwavering honesty?
48
David, you've written an eloquent column.
However, in the Tao Te Ching, Lao Tzu offers:
“True words aren't eloquent;
eloquent words aren't true.
Wise men don't need to prove their point;
men who need to prove their point aren't wise.
The Master has no possessions.
The more he does for others,
the happier he is.
The more he gives to others,
the wealthier he is.”
It strikes me that the people most likely to radiate the inner light you speak of are those who do and give, in the spirit that I most immediately associate with those lines from the Gospel of Matthew (no pun intended) that I sang as an impressionable youth:
"Whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers, that you do onto me."
I would argue that these lines remain central to the progressive vision of politics. We daily envision a world where people feel secure enough to live lives of authentic beauty and quiet dignity. If only the people you weekly spin for shared that vision.
However, in the Tao Te Ching, Lao Tzu offers:
“True words aren't eloquent;
eloquent words aren't true.
Wise men don't need to prove their point;
men who need to prove their point aren't wise.
The Master has no possessions.
The more he does for others,
the happier he is.
The more he gives to others,
the wealthier he is.”
It strikes me that the people most likely to radiate the inner light you speak of are those who do and give, in the spirit that I most immediately associate with those lines from the Gospel of Matthew (no pun intended) that I sang as an impressionable youth:
"Whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers, that you do onto me."
I would argue that these lines remain central to the progressive vision of politics. We daily envision a world where people feel secure enough to live lives of authentic beauty and quiet dignity. If only the people you weekly spin for shared that vision.
469
Also from Lao Tzu...... "The way that can be described is not the true way. "
Then there's the bit from Jesus about the left hand and right hand being utter strangers to each other.
Slippery fish, this enlightenment.
Then there's the bit from Jesus about the left hand and right hand being utter strangers to each other.
Slippery fish, this enlightenment.
Great response - I also like Alexander Pope's couplet 'Words are like leaves and where they most abound/much truth of sense beneath is rarely found'.
Why do you say impressionable when singing a wonderful verse?
This reminds me of a story a young widow at a grief group told, about how she went around her neighborhood one summer evening to see how people spend their time after dinner and before bedtime -- she needed some new ideas now that her husband and their old patterns were gone. She was kind of peering into other people's lives to get ideas for her own. The way she told the story was charming, and I am similarly a sucker for the earnestness of David Brooks when he writes like this.
67
You're not the only one. It's like Lucy teeing up the football for Charlie Brown all over again.
3
This column is almost too pretentious for words! Two kinds of virtue, come on! Most people I know lead lives with many kinds of virtue and certainly not an either/or kind of life-time. It is just not very illuminating to read this complacent view from on high. Too many people in our society live hard lives, made harder by the sanctimonious utterances from the crowd of elite and wealthy that Mr Brooksa and his GOP friends represent. Armchair morality, from the comfortable, rings hollow when the moralist has shown he is less interested in social justice and more interested in protecting an amoral status quo.
456
You lost me at "amoral," Jack. It's utterly immoral what they're doing and saying.
4
Why only almost?
1
"Two kinds of virtue, come on!"
David Brooks is the master of the false dichotomy.
David Brooks is the master of the false dichotomy.
12
You mention Dorothy Day and settlement houses (for immigrants) along with Frances Perkins and "worker's rights."
How do you square this with your support for a Republican Party who wants to end immigration and quash unions (and worker's rights?)
How do you square this with your support for a Republican Party who wants to end immigration and quash unions (and worker's rights?)
837
That's the question, is it not? The answer is that you can not.
9
When Ms. Day was working, this nation had fewer than 100 million people. Today we are over 320 million. It's a different world. We can no longer take in millions of immigrants, let alone have an insecure border that permits massive illegal immigration.
1
Debra
The only reply we ever got from David Brooks was when he recently whined about those of us who see through his monumental hypocrisy. In this column he had the audacity to point out his "career success, " success at bringing about war and diminishing the lives of the "99%."
The only reply we ever got from David Brooks was when he recently whined about those of us who see through his monumental hypocrisy. In this column he had the audacity to point out his "career success, " success at bringing about war and diminishing the lives of the "99%."
18
Who’s got time for all of this tortured self-improvement? Most of us aren’t quite as self-involved as Brooks thinks we are, nor are we as successful, or as competitive, or as focused on external achievement. Most of us are simply trying to get by as part of a middle-class cohort that has been saddled with debt, poor job prospects, ruinously expensive education and stagnant wages. I can only imagine that Mr. Brooks is projecting.
We all have our core sins. From the list provided, I’m proud to say that I have a rather balanced portfolio. But the “sins” of desperation and selfishness are the result of people feeling neglected and undervalued by the country that their efforts built.
Conservatives are always lamenting the individualist worldview. But economic abandonment has created a dispirited underclass in this country from which dissatisfaction and anger occasionally erupt, such as when they occupied Wall Street. Economic forces also prevent young people from affording an education, buying a home, and starting a family. Some see rootless iconoclasts where others see people who are forced to forego what were middle-class expectations just a few decades ago.
We’re all dependent on each other. I’m surprised that Brooks needs a bullet point to remind himself of it, although anyone who shills for our current crop of Republican ideologues might have a blind spot in that area. I wish him the best, though, and hope to see his self-growth reflected in future columns.
We all have our core sins. From the list provided, I’m proud to say that I have a rather balanced portfolio. But the “sins” of desperation and selfishness are the result of people feeling neglected and undervalued by the country that their efforts built.
Conservatives are always lamenting the individualist worldview. But economic abandonment has created a dispirited underclass in this country from which dissatisfaction and anger occasionally erupt, such as when they occupied Wall Street. Economic forces also prevent young people from affording an education, buying a home, and starting a family. Some see rootless iconoclasts where others see people who are forced to forego what were middle-class expectations just a few decades ago.
We’re all dependent on each other. I’m surprised that Brooks needs a bullet point to remind himself of it, although anyone who shills for our current crop of Republican ideologues might have a blind spot in that area. I wish him the best, though, and hope to see his self-growth reflected in future columns.
529
If David Brooks is really determined to improve, he should start by writing a completely honest column or two or twelve about the current Republican party.
Stop defending the indefensible, David, and come over from the dark side.
Stop defending the indefensible, David, and come over from the dark side.
67
Gemli--on the rare occasion when the wealthy get guilt-stricken over their ill-gotten gains, they either look outward and become great philanthropists (like Carnegie and Rockefeller) or they project like crazy and try to whip the rest of us sinners into shape. My gut feeling is that Brooks still can't let go of the projection. Ah, well, baby steps, baby steps...:)
27
Sadly, Gemli is attempting to politicize anything Mr. Brooks, or any such ideas, his political 'opponents' have to say. It is seen as a threat to the very thing he considers so important, which is exactly the point Mr. Brooks is trying to make. A one-sided selfish worldview is always threatened when the right of free speech is exercised and in such a way as to reflect something other than the kind of restricted circumscribed worldview taken today by the political left. Is anyone's very process of thought to be usurped by 'Big Brother'?
It is as if it would be almost a crime if anyone were to point out any error in their ideology. The leftist ideology is in fact the worst danger today to the continued existence of America's, and the whole worlds', very civilization!
They proclaim what civilization is supposed to amount to, and in this way reflect ultimate intolerance, the kind of intolerance that was incarnated at times in history, like during the Inquisition, and in today's continuing witchhunts.
It is as if it would be almost a crime if anyone were to point out any error in their ideology. The leftist ideology is in fact the worst danger today to the continued existence of America's, and the whole worlds', very civilization!
They proclaim what civilization is supposed to amount to, and in this way reflect ultimate intolerance, the kind of intolerance that was incarnated at times in history, like during the Inquisition, and in today's continuing witchhunts.
3
Which of the Repub candidates exhibits "inner light"?
Climate deniers, compassionless, with Super Pacs bedight,
What lies within their "Bucket Lists" but stooging for the Rich,
And if Brooks seeks a better self, is he ready to switch,
To support Ms E. Warren and Bernie Sanders, too?
Or is his self exploration bathetic bunkaroo?
Climate deniers, compassionless, with Super Pacs bedight,
What lies within their "Bucket Lists" but stooging for the Rich,
And if Brooks seeks a better self, is he ready to switch,
To support Ms E. Warren and Bernie Sanders, too?
Or is his self exploration bathetic bunkaroo?
642
Wow, Larry--one of your best. You nailed it!
3
Neither Ms.Warren nor Mr.Sanders are running for President. Furthermore, Mr. Sanders is 74 years old (Ms. Warren will be 67 in 2016!).
They are certainly not perfect, either of them anyways.
They are certainly not perfect, either of them anyways.
1
Jeb Bush of course! He was recently boasting how Florida has more concealed gun license holders than any other state. It is just that inner light shinning brightly
17
Many know that to have a different world, we, you, have to live a different life. It may be a long while before any of us reads such a gentle introduction as to how the trip on that adventure could start.
Beauty is not partisan - joy is not for a few. The shackles that constrain too many of our lives are mental, not physical. Our aversion to step on this path that Mr. Brooks has doodled so well is personal - what stops you, me, from finding something wonderful in someone, or something, today, and lovingly sharing it?