Recently bought a one plus phone (because I was one of the select to get an invite) and then realized the folly of it. I had a perfectly working HTC One for last two years. After a few days of internal delibration (without opening the package), I decided I did not need it and sold it off in Amazon, recovering my entire cost. First time ever I have taken action on my buyer's remorse and feel pretty good about it.
17
And just who is "we" of this classically myopic op ed? A huge percentage of America's and, even more so, the world's population doesn't own enough to produce clutter. Worrying about clutter is an anxiety for the privileged and entitled.
23
I've seen two types of interesting Comments here. One type is those who have had to clean out (and/or live with) folks who clutter or hoard. That can be a real lesson (I've experienced it). Another type is those who live on boats (I've considered it). How does an individual test for his/her appropriate level? A key reason I love backpacking is that it forces you to get to the essentials of life. You typically carry everything you need for a week, and hopefully are out of cell range. If you get lost, no worry, where ever you are becomes your home for the night and you have everything you need. That's a little too ascetic for me long term. But when I return home my discernment is sharper, as if seeing in a new light. I recognize stuff that I don't need and other stuff that I truly appreciate..
22
In the recent past, my parents passed away unexpectedly one year apart. We already had an established household and my sister took what she wanted from my parent's home. She, too, had an established home. That left me with tons of stuff to either sell, incorporate or store elsewhere.
We sold everything we could and still have two storage units we are paying for holding the rest of the "stuff."
My suggestion is that, before this happens to you (God forbid), have a clear plan of who gets what and what to do with what's left.
It will save a lot of hard feelings, time and overwhelming clutter trying to incorporate two or more households.
We sold everything we could and still have two storage units we are paying for holding the rest of the "stuff."
My suggestion is that, before this happens to you (God forbid), have a clear plan of who gets what and what to do with what's left.
It will save a lot of hard feelings, time and overwhelming clutter trying to incorporate two or more households.
20
My cousin has a lovely 3 room apartment on the UWS that is overrun with books and newspapers. He also pays for storage lockers of newspapers and his parents' belongings - none of it furniture! He is 77, mentally ill and it has probably caused if not exacerbated (sic) health and financial problems. He has old toothbrush heads that should've been replaced years ago but declines my offer to bring him new ones.
Several years ago, he was forced to get rid of the newspapers and put all the books one some sort of shelving. He was on probation and subject to random inspections. Once the probation period ended two years ago, the newspaper piles came back. When I was last there in October, the newspapers were now in a giant heap. That is when I realized that there was some sort of mental problem going on.
However, because of him, I tend to keep my place clutter free. When my father passed away 11 years ago, I went through my parents' papers and reduced them to fit into a plastic tub that went under my bed...that I haven't looked at since.
With respect to my parents, what's in my heart is more important than what's in my home.
Several years ago, he was forced to get rid of the newspapers and put all the books one some sort of shelving. He was on probation and subject to random inspections. Once the probation period ended two years ago, the newspaper piles came back. When I was last there in October, the newspapers were now in a giant heap. That is when I realized that there was some sort of mental problem going on.
However, because of him, I tend to keep my place clutter free. When my father passed away 11 years ago, I went through my parents' papers and reduced them to fit into a plastic tub that went under my bed...that I haven't looked at since.
With respect to my parents, what's in my heart is more important than what's in my home.
17
Mind clutter IS the bigger problem. Mind clutter is probably part of the reason for age-related memory loss (outside of medical causes). Without down time to process experiences, we don't have an opportunity to review them, consider their import and effect on us, which is all part of making a memory.
I used to lie in bed at night, waiting for sleep, and think about the day I'd had, maybe get a few ideas for the morrow. Now I light up the phone and play scrabble with CPU until my lids get heavy. I might learn a new word, but I'm forgetting what what's-his-name asked me to do in the morning.
I used to lie in bed at night, waiting for sleep, and think about the day I'd had, maybe get a few ideas for the morrow. Now I light up the phone and play scrabble with CPU until my lids get heavy. I might learn a new word, but I'm forgetting what what's-his-name asked me to do in the morning.
32
"Visual Noise" is a phrase I used to help illustrate to my brother and parents of the negative affect my brother's massive amount of stuff he'd brought back to our parents' house as he moved back home at the age of 29. Each piece was a task to do, and a disraction, obscuring or obstructing the more important issues he needed to deal with. The noise can be as inrusive as loud music in a bar, where you cannot think clearly nor have a meaningful conversation.
25
Any suggestions on how to streamline USA bureaucracy???
It is a tsunami of redtape, busywork, paperwork, forms, numbers, rules, regulations, paper and digital clutter at every level of government imposed on the individual.
Corporations are bad too. Every transaction generates more digital and paper clutter. Insurance, healthcare, you name it. Even shopping for food or office supplies generates complexity with reward programs.
All of this is sucking up our valuable time. We only have one life and so much is wasted on overly-complex bureaucracy.
HELP!
It is a tsunami of redtape, busywork, paperwork, forms, numbers, rules, regulations, paper and digital clutter at every level of government imposed on the individual.
Corporations are bad too. Every transaction generates more digital and paper clutter. Insurance, healthcare, you name it. Even shopping for food or office supplies generates complexity with reward programs.
All of this is sucking up our valuable time. We only have one life and so much is wasted on overly-complex bureaucracy.
HELP!
22
After my father died, and the estate sale, my mom packed a couple bags and came to live with me. Soon she found a small in-law apt., and there lived for 7 years, as carefree, she remarked, as when she was in college. Ten years ago she bought a medium McMansion nearby, with a Wolf, a Subzero, tons of closet space.
And things to fill it.
If you have the space, and a cycle of life that brings things into it, it's very hard to stay uncluttered.
And things to fill it.
If you have the space, and a cycle of life that brings things into it, it's very hard to stay uncluttered.
15
So easy to get another polo shirt, another pair of running shoes - these are just right, and I might need them soon! Weekly magazines that pile up unread. Books we have read, and some we haven't. Textbooks from college some time in the previous century.
Thanks, Pamela, and good luck to us all.
Thanks, Pamela, and good luck to us all.
14
I've always enjoyed her pieces. I like this particular one so much I printed out and placed it on top of other ones I've saved over the last few days.
On the floor alongside my desk. Right next to the ones from last week.
On the floor alongside my desk. Right next to the ones from last week.
34
Now that I found out from Ms. Druckerman's entertaining article that "de-cluttering" is trendy I'm far more comfortable with my clutter and have no intention of doing anything about it.
26
Organizing is a lot like money: when you don't have it, you worry about it; once you get it, it's no big deal; it can't buy happiness (an illusion in itself); once your basic needs are met, it doesn't seem like much, but if your basic needs aren't met, you need it a lot. Then you can worry about all your other problems.
9
On NYT advice, I read Maria Kondo's book, and found it uniquely helpful. I put her technique into effect (partially; how can one do this in one-fell-swoop, pray tell?), and have more space and more organization, and have just received permission from my accountant to throw out LOTS of documents. It all feels REALLY GOOD. But Pamela is right, and her last sentence is spot-on, it is not the definition of lasting happiness, and the acquire-get-rid-of cycle, goes on. What I like about M. Kondo's advice is the attention to the mindfulness aspect of clearing out. Her little ceremonies help to eliminate the tastes of aversion and self-judgment at accumulating the objects in the first place. Nothing is beneath acknowledgment and gratitude.
16
Possession of many things has is like Janus; it has two faces. Organized; your possessions give you a sense of security, many times, no need to run to the store (I live 25 miles from the nearest hardware store) and a possible sense of success. Disorganized, it becomes clutter where you do not know what you have and a pain in the neck { and with that run to the hardware store, you'll find some day that you already had two boxes of the (e.g.) screws you just bought}
18
The cure -- If you move to NYC you quickly learn that you cannot keep clutter. Spaces are too small even in multimillion places to store random stuff.
12
I think that clutter comes about because humans are hard wired to save those things that might be needed later. It is probably an evolutionary trait developed because humans did better when they had more "stuff" at the ready, than those who were vagabonds or nomads and kept few possessions. It just makes sense. You buy a new roasting pan to accomodate a big dinner party group. You use it, it's a success. What are you going to do? Throw or give it away, and then have to go buy one the next time? Not most folks.
Clutter, or squirreling away items, is also related to "art". You collect a tangible item because it gives you pleasure to look at it, or to own it. The object is (to you) beautiful, or it is rewarding, or makes you smile. When and if the items get overwhelming, or take too much time or space to maintain, most people have a garage sale, or contribute to Goodwill. Unless it's pathological and damaging, people are making too much of clutter just to have a new thing to complain about. Or sell a book with "the answer".
Clutter, or squirreling away items, is also related to "art". You collect a tangible item because it gives you pleasure to look at it, or to own it. The object is (to you) beautiful, or it is rewarding, or makes you smile. When and if the items get overwhelming, or take too much time or space to maintain, most people have a garage sale, or contribute to Goodwill. Unless it's pathological and damaging, people are making too much of clutter just to have a new thing to complain about. Or sell a book with "the answer".
13
As the climate worsens, as our economies therefore fall apart, we may need a few things we own but don't currently use--big pots to feed the neighborhood, warm, warm clothes and bedding for power outages and blizzards, and so on. But mostly, we need to stop generating the production of essentially useless products that clog up the earth. It's the earth that needs to be decluttered. We need to stop indulging, via our passivity and consumption, those who make profits out of excess production of unimportant, unneeded objects.
34
My daughter has made me promise to start decluttering. Every time, I begin going through stuff, I find something else I'd rather do. Instead of actually decluttering, I read numerous books and articles on how to do it. It's a struggle!
19
My first thought: Where did artist Sarah Lazarovic put all her new paintings?
13
This reminds me of the famous George Carlin routine about finding a place for your stuff.
But whereas George Carlin said clutter was essentially a question of ownership ("get your s**t away from my stuff"), this article suggests people are finally getting sick of even their own stuff.
Clutter, however, concerns the volume of space we have for stuff, which gets to our desire for storage space. The same collection of stuff may look minimal in a palace but become clutter in a 450-sf studio. If we can at least hide our stuff in closets and cabinets, we can sometimes minimize the illusion of clutter.
Hoarding also seems to be in inverse proportion to financial security. Poor people are packrats because they feel like they can't afford to throw things away.
But whereas George Carlin said clutter was essentially a question of ownership ("get your s**t away from my stuff"), this article suggests people are finally getting sick of even their own stuff.
Clutter, however, concerns the volume of space we have for stuff, which gets to our desire for storage space. The same collection of stuff may look minimal in a palace but become clutter in a 450-sf studio. If we can at least hide our stuff in closets and cabinets, we can sometimes minimize the illusion of clutter.
Hoarding also seems to be in inverse proportion to financial security. Poor people are packrats because they feel like they can't afford to throw things away.
7
with a mug of tea and a cookie, it is almost fun to do.
7
I have a friend who used to develop rental housing projects who now develops mini storage factitious. He found they were much easier to fill and the tenants were problem free.
I think the problem as the author eludes, is not too much or too tittle, it is the aspiration we attach to our stuff. Most Westerners believe that stuff is all theire is, so it follows that our lives would be defined by what we do or do not have. But I think our problem is one of meaning and the current believe in meaninglessness leads many of us to accumulate both things and relationships without a unifying narrative. In the past and in communities still rooted in the past, there is still belief in a story that turns clutter into narrative elements which eventually define a life.
I believe their is a transcendent narrative and it guides my approach to accumulation and redistribution. When stuff becomes a means and not an ends, it not only creates order, but delivers joy. At least thats what I have experienced.
I think the problem as the author eludes, is not too much or too tittle, it is the aspiration we attach to our stuff. Most Westerners believe that stuff is all theire is, so it follows that our lives would be defined by what we do or do not have. But I think our problem is one of meaning and the current believe in meaninglessness leads many of us to accumulate both things and relationships without a unifying narrative. In the past and in communities still rooted in the past, there is still belief in a story that turns clutter into narrative elements which eventually define a life.
I believe their is a transcendent narrative and it guides my approach to accumulation and redistribution. When stuff becomes a means and not an ends, it not only creates order, but delivers joy. At least thats what I have experienced.
9
As a third generation, at least, clutterer, I'm glad I saved some of the things from my great-grandparents to pass along as part of our family history. The family I've shared them with appreciate them.
Tho, I must admit, I have too much - some of the knick-knacks I have on the shelves give me pleasure to look at and cheer me up. The others I've sold at consignment shops.
Clothes in three sizes - never know when you're going to gain/lose weight and one's prepared which ever way it goes. No need to go out and buy more stuff.
And there are times I've been able to find things in a drawer or on a shelf that I need occasionally - no need to go buy a new one.
It's always puzzled me how people rush out to buy a new snow shovel at the warning of a snow storm - didn't they save the one from last year?
Tho, I must admit, I have too much - some of the knick-knacks I have on the shelves give me pleasure to look at and cheer me up. The others I've sold at consignment shops.
Clothes in three sizes - never know when you're going to gain/lose weight and one's prepared which ever way it goes. No need to go out and buy more stuff.
And there are times I've been able to find things in a drawer or on a shelf that I need occasionally - no need to go buy a new one.
It's always puzzled me how people rush out to buy a new snow shovel at the warning of a snow storm - didn't they save the one from last year?
14
If they bought a cheaper plastic shovel for winter snow (which is the typical shovel these days) then yes they will need a new shovel every year because the one from last year broke.
A good rule for clothing is "Have I worn it in 2 full years?" No? Throw it away or donate. You wont miss it.
A good rule for clothing is "Have I worn it in 2 full years?" No? Throw it away or donate. You wont miss it.
7
Read Roz Chast's award-winning graphic book about her parents (and their monstrous clutter) -- you'll laugh, you'll cry!
"Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant?" excerpt here:
http://projects.newyorker.com/story/chast-parents/
"Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant?" excerpt here:
http://projects.newyorker.com/story/chast-parents/
24
Read the Roz Chast piece: spot on, funny, and heartbreaking. Strongly recommend.
9
I've had the "less is more" mentality for as long as I can remember. Although it seems like like it is becoming a more mainstream trend, there are still many times, such as birthdays and Christmas when such ideals are disregarded.
I hope for this movement countinues to gain steam, as it will cause nothing but good for people as well as our planet.
I hope for this movement countinues to gain steam, as it will cause nothing but good for people as well as our planet.
6
No, de-cluttering your home will not de-clutter your mind. It's not a spiritual practice. Thinking that it will, will lead to disappointment. What de-cluttering will do is give you more space, make it easier to find things, and make it easier to keep things clean and organized (physical things, not your work life, not your social life). If not being able to find things quickly when you want them; bumping into stuff in your house; and not particularly liking to look at a messy room, but not particularly enjoying the task of cleaning it cause you some stress and anxiety (as they do for me), then de-cluttering will give you some emotional benefit as well. If you want a less stressful relationship with your stuff, de-cluttering is for you. If you want a quieter mind, I recommend meditation.
26
Yes, that's it exactly. I don't like not being able to find things when I want them, or having to unearth them from the bottom of a pile or stack of other things that are put in front or on top of them. I hate looking at a messy room! I would love to have a well-organized, color-coordinated room with artful and meaningful furnishings and decorations, not junk. I don't want to worry about knocking my husband's bike over when I walk down the hallway. I don't like going into my daughter's room because she has clothes, books, papers, craft projects, etc. all over her floor, desk, bed, bedside table, etc. Because of all this, I am not able to relax in my own home. I always feel I need tidy up before I can sit down and relax. Too bad my husband and kids don't have the same urge.
8
My cousin-in-law was an executive with a large company. He and his wife lived in a large well-kept house in the foothills in the Bay area...They had been married 40 years when he retired and they sold their home to move to a smaller place. I have never forgotten visiting them as she stood looking forlorn amid large boxes marked 'save', 'donate' and 'trash' ...she teared up as she said, "I'm now discarding what I spent 40 years accumulating" . I heard that while her husband rejoiced in their down-sized life, she never quite got over her sense of loss...
12
“Clutter isn’t a new problem, of course. But suddenly, it’s not just irritating — it’s evil.” In cold blood?
2
Decluttering might just be avoidance of, or preparation for, the creative act. Hemingway: How do I know when I am ready to write? I find myself cleaning out the fridge.
14
I have heard there is a saying in the military, "three moves equals one good fire". I've moved three times in the past 10 years, and I believe it.
It's fine to declutter on your own initiative. It's awful when someone declutters you without your permission. I know of two second husbands, one of them mine, who took the opportunity to declutter when he moved in. Not his stuff - mine. Six years later I'm still realizing that things I thought were stored in the attic were, sadly, just gone. My best friend went looking for her pasta maker one day, and the answer was, "oh, I wasn't going to use it, so I got rid of it". So she threw away a frying pan he'd brought with him, and when he asked her where it was, she said, "oh, I wasn't going to use it, so I got rid of it." They didn't speak for two days.
It's fine to declutter on your own initiative. It's awful when someone declutters you without your permission. I know of two second husbands, one of them mine, who took the opportunity to declutter when he moved in. Not his stuff - mine. Six years later I'm still realizing that things I thought were stored in the attic were, sadly, just gone. My best friend went looking for her pasta maker one day, and the answer was, "oh, I wasn't going to use it, so I got rid of it". So she threw away a frying pan he'd brought with him, and when he asked her where it was, she said, "oh, I wasn't going to use it, so I got rid of it." They didn't speak for two days.
30
This is crazy. The author has not even gone through the exercise, but is merely reflexively assuming that decluttering is a new fad that has no substance. I think the author has no real understanding of the point of this. This is shown by her statement, "I can sit in an empty room, and still get nothing done." The obsession with productivity is part of the problem. Not doing anything, having anything or striving for anything is actually pretty OK, and doesn't mean you are a useless and boring person as many of us assume. The meaning of your life does not have to be in your accomplishments and possessions.
19
I have read that there are psychological reasons for clutter. Some people surround themselves with clutter for protection (protective clutter) and some people collect clutter to fill their empty lives (pump clutter) and some people substitute clutter for love (no-sex clutter). All I can advise is never buy a bunch of plastic containers or de-cluttering books before coming up with a plan to eliminate your clutter. I now have added plastic containers filled with "stuff" and more books to my original clutter and have duplicated whatever I originally had because I can't find a damn thing.
18
Took a move to Boston after living abroad for 14+ years to address some serious clutter from our London flat, as well as the stuff in the attic from my parent's house of 40+ years. Now my mind is free to contemplate all this snow that has fallen in our new city...lucky us. I think.
5
Pamela Druckerman just described my life.
2
When too much of everything becomes
a burden instead of a comfort, it's time
to let it go.
a burden instead of a comfort, it's time
to let it go.
7
I got divorced and moved twice in 14 months. The combination is a good recipe for reducing one's inventory of miscellaneous stuff. I also got to leave a collection of mismatched, hand me down and grungy furnishings and replaced them with a smaller collection of items that actually go together. However, there are some days when I come home and sit in my 110% clutter free living room and it feels like a hotel suite. I think there is a certain level of clutterage that contributes to a warm, lived in, homey look. So my new challenge is how to get to that point but not go beyond it.
23
Classic Pamela Druckerman. Thoughtful and precise, leaving the reader with that feeling of "let me read the other stuff she wrote". Weekly column from Miss Druckerman at the Times? It is time. Thome Nicocelli, MD. Brooklyn, NY.
7
Perhaps the problem of clutter is similar to the law of parsimony in science (Occam’s razor). Although there have been many formulations of this law, perhaps in this context the formulation attributed to Einstein is most appropriate: “Everything should be as simple as possible, but no simpler.”
8
Pascal diagnosed the problem four centuries ago: "All of men's miseries derive from not being able to sit quietly alone in an empty room." Why conditions that are so inherently comforting as silence and emptiness seem to be this terrifying to us is a puzzle.
11
Re-reading Druckerman's column, I discovered that she made a very sly reference to Pascal's thought in her second-to-last paragraph, which is probably what made me think of it in the first place.
2
I have to agree with those commenters who urge caution. Our precious daughter passed away last May and my Mother passed away last week. My family always teased my parents about their clutter. They have saved every get well card, birthday card, etc from the past 20 years! We actually found long lost relative names/addresses for notification on Mother's services. Our daughter kept an online blog during her illness. We printed that out and it's now in a binder we can glance at anytime we choose. We have a small collection of her baby clothes and other treasured childhood items. It brings us great comfort to know we still have those.
100
Whenever I get exited and enthused about de-cluttering, I make a
big mistake. I watch Antiques Roadshow and worry that I may be
throwing away something worth a fortune!
big mistake. I watch Antiques Roadshow and worry that I may be
throwing away something worth a fortune!
49
Less is more
3
Very well written Ms. Druckerman.
5
i had my own "road to Damascus" moment a few years ago when i bought a captain's bed and realized that I had enough space to make my apartment look more spare by putting things away. It's very much an ongoing process, which is OK, because the one thing all clutter consultants apparently agree on is that it should be done as a project but a part of one's life.
So every few weeks, inspired by an online episode of "Hoarders," the ultimate schadenfreude in clutter porn, I tackle T-shirts or CDs or old electronics or boxes of pens.
One thing I've noticed is how much has become extraneous thanks to the Internet. I have discarded nearly all of my once quite-large collection of reference books. Next to go are the cookbooks, at this point purely for sentimental reasons since I haven't looked in one in years. Why bother when dozens of applicable recipes are a click away?
Unlike many avid readers, I find getting rid of books very liberating. When I'm done with a novel, if a friend expresses interest, it's his.
So every few weeks, inspired by an online episode of "Hoarders," the ultimate schadenfreude in clutter porn, I tackle T-shirts or CDs or old electronics or boxes of pens.
One thing I've noticed is how much has become extraneous thanks to the Internet. I have discarded nearly all of my once quite-large collection of reference books. Next to go are the cookbooks, at this point purely for sentimental reasons since I haven't looked in one in years. Why bother when dozens of applicable recipes are a click away?
Unlike many avid readers, I find getting rid of books very liberating. When I'm done with a novel, if a friend expresses interest, it's his.
8
Every time I pass a storage unit,, Shurgard, UHaul, whatever, I recall that their rents are some of the highest per square foot and I wonder how that compares to the aggregate value of their contents. My economics background screams "opportunity cost".
But those units are not full of useless merchandize or personal property. They are instead a study in optionality (should I keep it or toss it) or perhaps deferred decision/procrastination...(I'd rather pay the $200 a month than deal with it).
We have three of them.
But those units are not full of useless merchandize or personal property. They are instead a study in optionality (should I keep it or toss it) or perhaps deferred decision/procrastination...(I'd rather pay the $200 a month than deal with it).
We have three of them.
12
I knew a couple who had 3 storage units @ $100. each per month. After four years of "out of sight, out of mind", when they finally decided to deal with the contents, hauling it all back to their house for a big garage sale, they cleared about $300. or about a month's rent in storage fees. That was five years ago and they are still fighting over it.
5
For myself, one of the greatest tools for battling clutter is the eReader. I read a lot, and a lot of that is books in series, sometimes of more than 20. (And yes, sometimes I do re-read books I love.) My eReader has made it possible for me to no longer agonize over what to keep and what to donate (with the series books, it has to be all or nothing). In fact I now have a rule that if a novel, even a much-loved one, is available in digital format, the print copy goes to the used book sale. (Although sadly, I never miss the sale myself, but I try to stick to non-fiction topics like pet care and gardening.)
4
Oh the pain this topic evokes. I cant pull anything out of a cabinet without starting an avalanche. I cant find space on a table to work. I cant find things, and this gives me great anxiety. My wife won't stop bringing more and more stuff in. It's starting to pile up outside. She'd say clutter is just life in action, and won't relent. I tried to organize and to fight, but lost. I can't feel connected to my home environment any more. I worry my child is getting used to it, and will flood her own home like this one day.
14
The collectibles part of my house is quite neat, as is the library (except for the newest acquisition of three boxes of books which haven't found their way to the shelves). It is my work area that is not just cluttered, but swamped in paper. Yes, I know - everything can be kept in computer files. They are on the computer, but having had crashes in the past, I play safe by having a paper back-up as well as the cloud and a second hard drive. What clutter artists really need is roomies who love to file...
5
I am always aghast when I visit homes with children's toys all over the living room, especially in small apartments. It makes the home look like a chaotic preschool classroom, except that unlike what you find in most schools, the stuff tends to stupid, plastic crap, most it broken or missing parts. For the record, I have two young children and we live in a small apartment - my son doesn't even have a "real" bedroom but rather a converted dining room - but I insist that the living room area be neat, clean, and free of toys and other clutter. And I feel strongly that kids don't need THAT many toys. Think about it: They're in school all day, have on average two if not more after-school activities, and are (or should be) outdoors on the weekends or visiting with friends. So when are they actually home playing? Hardly ever. They don't really don't NEED all that junk which usually is just sitting there collecting dust. A bookcase full of books, some fun and intelligent board games, a couple of favorite stuffed animals and dolls, some arts and crafts supplies, a collection of whatever they are into (dinosaurs, sea shells, etc..) and a handful of well made, imaginative toys is more than enough.
16
People who don't mind letting their kids play in the living room might have equally smug and judgmental remarks to make about your apartment.
9
But my kids DO play in the living room - I just have them clean up afterwards and their toys don't live in it. You completely misread my comment.
9
A friend who is a realtor told me that before she shows a house for sale, she removes half the furniture. It makes it more appealing. I keep that in mind and have told my husband that if we buy something, like a couch, we have to give the old one away. He is one of those people who gets attached to material goods, so we never buy anything new. It's a good way to save money.
11
I am not a zealot that insists on having only 100 things or wants to be able to stuff my whole life in a duffle bag, but i do find the less physical clutter that surrounds me, the more productive I am. It's a matter of being able to focus on the very few things that really matter: family, friends, career, health.
4
The things I keep, and will always keep, have memories attached. As Pablo Neruda wrote in his "Ode to Things":
"...all bear
the trace
of someone’s fingers
on their handle or surface,
the trace of a distant hand
lost
in the depths of forgetfulness."
"...all bear
the trace
of someone’s fingers
on their handle or surface,
the trace of a distant hand
lost
in the depths of forgetfulness."
6
Was it Thoreau or Emerson who said "Simplicity, Simplicity, Simplicity."?
1
Unless my memory is cluttered, it was Thoreau, and it was "Simplify..."
1
When I take a screenshot of comments I like, it clutters my IPad photo collection. Will I look at those screenshots again? Still in the acquisition mode here.
3
My Stuff...hey I may need that some day. Being in my 50s, I have gathered lots of things-some more useful than others. Some things that are nothing more than nostalgic and are the ones I grapple the most with when time comes for one of my raging decluttering missions. Other things I keep for the the intended (good intentions)purpose for having it in the first place. I kinda take pride in the fact that I can tackle most problems requiring various types of tools and required materials to do the job. Need that watch battery replaced-I got the tools to do it. Have a plumbing problem, got the tools. Feel like creating some art - I got the supplies. Want to make some music and get happy- grab an instrument. Want to plant a garden--I've got everything you need. I could go on and on... Is stuff the problem? Maybe if you're planning to travel extensively or your place is just too small to accommodate the things you have, otherwise it may be a bigger problem than just things.
Happily burdened.
Happily burdened.
7
Get a big dumpster- 20 yards or so. Hire some kids to throw stuff out. Do it. I did, and don't miss all that stuff. Who's gonna want my H.S. yearbook? Chuck it. If you hire some kids, they'll be merciless and humorous, and it'll be a fun couple of days. Then you can paint the place, sell it and move on. Just what we did. Simple.
4
Very good article.
Not from giving readers a sure-fire solution to clutter,
But interestingly written-
-how and why other nations must cope with the same problem
-humorous
yet one suspects truthful.
Not from giving readers a sure-fire solution to clutter,
But interestingly written-
-how and why other nations must cope with the same problem
-humorous
yet one suspects truthful.
2
When music went digital, my husband and I sold our CDs at around $5 each. Since together we had about 500 CDs, you can do the math on how much we made. Good money! And we loved having so much more space on our shelves for other things. I will not get rid of books, though. I don't enjoy e-books. And I think large bookshelves make a home beautiful and warm. So long as they are well organized, of course!
5
I agree with Druckerman that we cannot simply be fulfilled by having or not having many possessions. There is something more, something transcendent that we long for as a part of the human condition. The most fulfilling things are the non-material aspects of life such as relationships, love, self-gift.
4
The pathological feeling of need fostered by our consumer culture results in so many self destructive behaviors. Consuming is what is happenening while your life runs out.
If you have so much crap you can't properly clean your house it is time to deal with your stuff issue.
If you have so much crap you can't properly clean your house it is time to deal with your stuff issue.
7
Sheesh. Talk about #FIRSTWORLDPROBLEMS
5
"The wealth of bourgeois society, at first sight, presents itself as an immense accumulation of commodities..." Marx
4
Those of us obsessed with clutter often suffer from obsessive-compulsive behaviors and/or anxiety, which I am convinced is involved in a wide number of emotional and mental health problems. If you read between the lines of the story of the author of 'Seabiscuit', Laura Hillenbrand, behind her mysterious illnesses, you will see that each of her major episodes have been preceded by nervous breakdowns, or major anxiety attacks. This has not been mentioned in any coverage I have seen about her. I am not certain she is aware of this.
I think of different famous peoples' lives in regard to the matter of clutter. Many high-powered New Yorkers' desks are very cluttered. When Andy Rooney was still alive and doing his segments on '60 Minutes', his desk and office always had a marvelous, cluttered quality to them. But, his laptop where he wrote was always open and to his right.
Being overly organized can be a hamper to creativity, or even just to getting things done. There is no magic ideal. I think behind the idea of reducing clutter is our desire to find a peaceful place, a nirvana, our own Zen state, but, as Ms. Druckerman observed, lack of external clutter doesn't necessarily bring this inner peace to our lives. For those of us perpetually anxious, finding peace is elusive.
7
The intent of decluttering is to free up your time: less time shopping, less time cleaning, less time looking for things, less time thinking about your stuff, and maybe even less time working as your cost of living could decrease if you need less house because you have less stuff. And this is why Marie Kondo recommends decluttering ONCE in one big push -- less time decluttering. What you choose to do with your freed-up time is up to you. I did not experience a magical spiritual awakening after I decluttered, but I did have to give some thought to how to spend my freed-up time, which meant thinking about what I like to do. My apartment isn't empty, but I know exactly what is in it and exactly where everything is.
7
The author is forgetting one of the foundation laws of Physics, Conservation of Mess. Mess can neither be created or destroyed it can only be moved. If I cleaned up my the mess in my bedroom this law would mean some other poor sucker would have his mess increased. I just could not bare the thought of that so I will leave my mess alone. Altruism can be hard work sometimes......
37
David, thank you so much! Best advice I've gotten in eons. ;-)
1
What is astounding is that so many Americans live in huge houses, five thousand feet or more, for only two people, a couple who share a bedroom.
Bizarrely, even couples who downsize and sell their homes will then buy an equally large home so their adult children can visit and stay with them a few times a year, which means that a four to five bedroom house is usually empty. (Hint: Your adult children don't really want to stay with you, they value their privacy too, so get them hotel rooms.)
Living in Manhattan for most of us means living in a small space, as 500 square feet is a generous size for one person in this expensive city. It also means making sure that for everything that comes in, something equal goes out, which makes a person think before buying, not a bad way to live.
Bizarrely, even couples who downsize and sell their homes will then buy an equally large home so their adult children can visit and stay with them a few times a year, which means that a four to five bedroom house is usually empty. (Hint: Your adult children don't really want to stay with you, they value their privacy too, so get them hotel rooms.)
Living in Manhattan for most of us means living in a small space, as 500 square feet is a generous size for one person in this expensive city. It also means making sure that for everything that comes in, something equal goes out, which makes a person think before buying, not a bad way to live.
10
Another great thing about living in the city: Nowhere is it more true that one's man trash is another man's treasure. I've furnished much of my apartment from street finds — most of them replacements for previous street finds. When I, in turn, put that stuff on the street, it's usually snapped up in an hour.
When I threw out some old filing cabinets, at 4 a.m. that morning, I heard the sound of pounding on metal outside. Some African immigrants in a van apparently drive around neighborhoods before large-size items are picked up by Sanitation Dept. They break down the metal and sell it as scrap, which is pretty cool.
When I threw out some old filing cabinets, at 4 a.m. that morning, I heard the sound of pounding on metal outside. Some African immigrants in a van apparently drive around neighborhoods before large-size items are picked up by Sanitation Dept. They break down the metal and sell it as scrap, which is pretty cool.
4
It is satisfying, and a liberation of the mind. Nothing is worse than wasting valuable time managing "things."
9
I intentionally accumulate old castoff items to sell for my antique business. I’m convinced we humans are hardwired to gather. Memory appears to be a deep trigger: “My mom had one of these!” My weekly search for more clutter is specific, with found objects priced, cataloged and sold for a profit. I would have no market for these old things if customers did not feel value or affection for an item’s history, stories or materials. It’s stunning how much stuff surfaces in American thrift stores, things once held close to the heart for a lifetime, then tossed away when it no longer has an emotional tie, only to find another person to cherish it. I call the process catch and release. My own home is spare. Years of weekly visits to the landfill of Thrift Stores has short circuited the wiring to consume.
11
I was glad to see Karen Kingston's name mentioned here. Every since I read her book in the early 90s (and actually did what she said), I have remembered her advice on how to bypass all the back and forth in my head about whether I would use or repair or otherwise want or "need" this or that in some imagined future. That chatter when clutter-clearing is ALSO burdensome clutter.
To paraphrase, her advice was to note in your gut/heart if an object rings you or up or brings you down when you look at it or think about it. If it the latter, it is clutter, and can be gotten rid of; if the later, it probably has some good function in your life." The beauty part is you know RIGHT AWAY which one it is, and can move through the garbage bags. For example, I once saved every old love letter I had ever gotten from every (now failed) relationship. Realizing it made me sad and actually brought me down (rather than warm and mushy) when I thought about them prompted me to get rid of them, and I have never missed them for even a second.
To paraphrase, her advice was to note in your gut/heart if an object rings you or up or brings you down when you look at it or think about it. If it the latter, it is clutter, and can be gotten rid of; if the later, it probably has some good function in your life." The beauty part is you know RIGHT AWAY which one it is, and can move through the garbage bags. For example, I once saved every old love letter I had ever gotten from every (now failed) relationship. Realizing it made me sad and actually brought me down (rather than warm and mushy) when I thought about them prompted me to get rid of them, and I have never missed them for even a second.
6
It's not that lack of clutter is freeing or joyful, but it's the realization that having more stuff doesn't give us happiness. Letting go of the NEED to have more is freeing.
12
As a lifelong cluttered and beatnik, I have never found a solution, and when I had to move last year, it was a major disaster. I lost a lot of my long life. I love paper and a lo got tossed I wanted preserved. Thank god for Google
But now living in a senior facility, I now give my magazines to the community library. Paper can cause serious dire. Am I a good citizen?
But now living in a senior facility, I now give my magazines to the community library. Paper can cause serious dire. Am I a good citizen?
3
"I’m starting to suspect that the joy of ditching all of our stuff is just as illusory as the joy of acquiring it all was."
I would offer this thought: "joy" over having less isn't really the point. When we clear space in our daily lives our attention is free to roam. Without that open space, we're likely to stay right where we are; stuck, for instance, in sad, ungrateful thought patterns such as, "Less may be more, but it's still not enough."
I would offer this thought: "joy" over having less isn't really the point. When we clear space in our daily lives our attention is free to roam. Without that open space, we're likely to stay right where we are; stuck, for instance, in sad, ungrateful thought patterns such as, "Less may be more, but it's still not enough."
9
Clutter fills up the local landfill! I will not forget the movie "the Graduate" with Dustin Hoffman who is the graduate and is advised-- go into plastics my son.
How did we shop before the plastic bag came on the market? How did we carry liquids before BPA ( biphenyl A) was contaminating even the inside of metal cans let alone all plastic containers and even cashregister receipt. BPA produces estrogen type of chemical that is a carcinogen stimulating breast cancer and other things.
An old piece of furniture is history. A piece of plastic or cloth that is indestructible nylon plastic is the kind of clutter we should avoid to buy in the first place.
Recycle and stop tearing down old buildings to build a beautiful looking new floor and great mahogany panels to indicate the wealth of the owner at the expense of felling a forest and producing tons of construction waste.
OK I have a small mess near myself- it is part of sorting and recycling properly and I am not ashamed of it. I am happy to hear that Picasso had a messy studio.......
How did we shop before the plastic bag came on the market? How did we carry liquids before BPA ( biphenyl A) was contaminating even the inside of metal cans let alone all plastic containers and even cashregister receipt. BPA produces estrogen type of chemical that is a carcinogen stimulating breast cancer and other things.
An old piece of furniture is history. A piece of plastic or cloth that is indestructible nylon plastic is the kind of clutter we should avoid to buy in the first place.
Recycle and stop tearing down old buildings to build a beautiful looking new floor and great mahogany panels to indicate the wealth of the owner at the expense of felling a forest and producing tons of construction waste.
OK I have a small mess near myself- it is part of sorting and recycling properly and I am not ashamed of it. I am happy to hear that Picasso had a messy studio.......
5
Clutter to me not necessarily means clutter to someone else. If I have saved anything at all in my lifetime of 61 years I have found that losing a piece of your history is gaining a new future. Especially when you move which I have done on a couple of occasions.
I like new things and like my brother who deals in antiques after retiring from his job of 24 years doing something totally different is like ridding yourself of the clutter you don't really need anymore. Like a relationship who has either died or a family member who divorces. But we carry the burden of loss in our memories we don't want to live over again.
If I were to move from my apartment now after 20 years it is not the end game. It would be a new beginning. Would I bring we me things I have over that 20 year period? I think so. Would I want to leave anything behind. I think yes. I have lost and I have won most of what I have gained. It's not what I want to remember as what I want to forget. And that can be material gains. Like a bank account. It can be a job. It can be a death. Nothing will leave me with satisfaction then for someone to say to me sorry for your loss. How I respond well that is how I've accomplished what I've lost in life.
I like new things and like my brother who deals in antiques after retiring from his job of 24 years doing something totally different is like ridding yourself of the clutter you don't really need anymore. Like a relationship who has either died or a family member who divorces. But we carry the burden of loss in our memories we don't want to live over again.
If I were to move from my apartment now after 20 years it is not the end game. It would be a new beginning. Would I bring we me things I have over that 20 year period? I think so. Would I want to leave anything behind. I think yes. I have lost and I have won most of what I have gained. It's not what I want to remember as what I want to forget. And that can be material gains. Like a bank account. It can be a job. It can be a death. Nothing will leave me with satisfaction then for someone to say to me sorry for your loss. How I respond well that is how I've accomplished what I've lost in life.
4
Why is it all or nothing? Clutter can be a sign of a disease or it can be a desire to collect and enjoy things that we love. Organize the clutter and display it, or see a psychiatrist if you can't function and your surrounding becomes unlivable.
3
Have less then half the clothes and books and "stuff" of a couple of years ago. It wasn't easy, but totally worth it. I don't miss it. Not minimalist, but it's great.
6
Lady on Freecycle requested a sewing machine. I use my little portable about every couple of years. This article/comments made me decide to give it to her today. And a few more things are coming off my wall and table tops as well. Enough is enough.
3
I've always thought everyone should live out of a seabag for four years. You quickly learn what's really important.
34
When my wife died, I sold the house and moved onto a sailboat with four Rubbermaid tubs of stuff. That was fourteen years ago and i haven't opened those tubs in ten years. It's what I remember that is important, not what I have.
63
A luxury problem if ever there was one.
2
I lived next door to a woman who left every dish, pot and pan, canned good, bathroom and utility room item out on the counters. It looked as though her house had thrown up all over itself. She tried to justify this by saying she read somewhere that neat people may be claustrophobic. Sounded to me like a slob trying to justify her behavior.
Frequently now I ask family members to give to the Wounded Warrior Project instead of a gift for me. I have minimal clutter now and find I am just reorganizing it. I gave away all the books in the library but I just started filling up the shelves again as authors insist on writing new ones. Maybe caring for living plants would slow us down.
4
as you say the possessions have lost their value... the avalanche of cheap stuff is in truth worth less (if not worthless) but we all have memories of having lost something dear to us, only to find it was now impossible to replace. Things change so much, so fast, that i find most people hang on to things because they are afraid they will not EVER be able to replace them.
its a way of trying to gain control over the rapidly changing world we live in...
but it is doomed to fail.
its a way of trying to gain control over the rapidly changing world we live in...
but it is doomed to fail.
5
Keeping everything because you might need it at some point in the future is the old frugal Yankee way, steeped deeply into the culture of rural New England. Finding it when you need it can sometimes be a problem, however. But I hope you people will continue to dispose of everything. That way, 20 years from now, all this common stuff will be incredibly rare and valuable, and I can retire on the magnificent income I will derive selling all this junk back to you pathetic sheep who will be desperately attempting to achieve that posh, retro look some bestseller will tell you is the decade's hottest fashion trend...I love it!
6
An end to gift giving at Christmas would do wonders for reducing clutter. Socks only please!
14
And chocolates and homemade cinnamon buns, please!
7
None of us may ever discover (or uncover) an "authentic" self, even with the help of innumerable therapists and advice-givers. Many of us can recall, however, an existence that did not make us feel we were leading cluttered lives, even though we were surrounded by possessions, whether old, new, beloved, or loathed.
The author's penultimate paragraph (which mentions emails, photo-printing, Facebook, heightened demands, phones) suggests the villain responsible for the misery of clutter is the computer, in all its gadget-ized variations. I'd suggest that what we've lost as a result of universal computerization is time, both actual time in which we accomplish necessary tasks or bring creative ideas to fruition and a more abstract time in which we take stock of ourselves. I think I'd have to begin my own attempt to rid myself of clutter by first throwing my computer, my iPhone, and my printer into the nearest trash bin.
The author's penultimate paragraph (which mentions emails, photo-printing, Facebook, heightened demands, phones) suggests the villain responsible for the misery of clutter is the computer, in all its gadget-ized variations. I'd suggest that what we've lost as a result of universal computerization is time, both actual time in which we accomplish necessary tasks or bring creative ideas to fruition and a more abstract time in which we take stock of ourselves. I think I'd have to begin my own attempt to rid myself of clutter by first throwing my computer, my iPhone, and my printer into the nearest trash bin.
5
The clothing that doesn't fit any longer, the obsolescent technological equipment, the unused kitchen gadget that was a gift from someone; these things are clutter, certainly, and it's a good idea to take a day now and then and get rid of it. I don't think it is possible to get through a life without that kind of gradual accumulation and divestiture. But two things about this article, and many of the comments I have read, make me uncomfortable.
One is the reliance on someone else (author, professional organizer) to decide what we need and organize it for us. The other, and more serious aspect of so-called decluttering, is that it represents an erasure of our past.
What we collect can often be an expression of important, perhaps lifelong interests; items that resonate with our emotional or intellectual imagination; or simply what might be called tangible memory--the beautiful watch that my wife gave me that I don't wear now because I can check the time on a cell phone, but that I have no intention of parting with. (Once again, I'm not talking about an outdated modem.) Does one really want to through those things out, especially because is it stylish to do so?
One is the reliance on someone else (author, professional organizer) to decide what we need and organize it for us. The other, and more serious aspect of so-called decluttering, is that it represents an erasure of our past.
What we collect can often be an expression of important, perhaps lifelong interests; items that resonate with our emotional or intellectual imagination; or simply what might be called tangible memory--the beautiful watch that my wife gave me that I don't wear now because I can check the time on a cell phone, but that I have no intention of parting with. (Once again, I'm not talking about an outdated modem.) Does one really want to through those things out, especially because is it stylish to do so?
4
If you have other tangible items that remind you of your wife, if the watch doesn't have specific memories associated with it, I'd suggest you probably don't need to keep it.
Clutter is essential to our posterity. Without it we leave no record of what our society achieved and we valued. Today's clutter is tomorrow's priceless archaeological relic. But there's future relic and then there's junk. A water-damaged Ladies Home Journal from 1993 isn't a priceless treasure, it's junk. Do your children a favor and learn the difference. Then toss all the junk.
4
Could it be that decluttering is as materialistic as hoarding? Don't both say that it is through things that we express ourselves and seek redemption? If we preoccupy ourselves with things -- what to have, what to discard, what they mean, etc. -- isn't that materialism? Is decluttering really an escape?
6
Couldn't clutter clearers feel overwhelmed by choices?
I was an assistant to a man with hoarding tendencies for a while. It changed my idea of what "too much stuff" means.
Moving every few years has taught us to be choosy about what to add to our possessions. We get most of our books from the library nowadays, for example.
I was an assistant to a man with hoarding tendencies for a while. It changed my idea of what "too much stuff" means.
Moving every few years has taught us to be choosy about what to add to our possessions. We get most of our books from the library nowadays, for example.
2
The gospel of decluttering seems, to me, to play into overconsumption cycles: throw it out, replace it later if you need to, make room for more. It also serves the container and storage market well. I'm much more interested in decluttering on the front end: stop buying.
That said, I think this piece, and many of the comments, conflates different notions of what 'clutter' is. Are we talking about clutter from the overconsunption of cheap stuff? Or clutter from saving things to reuse them? Are we talking about too much stuff, or disorganization?
That said, I think this piece, and many of the comments, conflates different notions of what 'clutter' is. Are we talking about clutter from the overconsunption of cheap stuff? Or clutter from saving things to reuse them? Are we talking about too much stuff, or disorganization?
3
I strongly disagree. People who hoard at any level find it a life-changing experience actually to be able to throw things away. It causes a change in one's thinking in most instances.
4
I find it extremely valuable to have at least one place where there is no cutter- physical, or mental. In my house it's one large table that I never allow anything to accumulate on. I use it every day, but I always remove everything from it when I leave it. This discipline gives me a sort of refuge, a place where there is nothing demanding to be dealt with; a place, so to speak, where there is nothing on the table. It's a place where I can find peace.
11
Both my partner and I came from families that were voracious hoarders whose greatest entertainment was shopping, accumulating and adding to their various prized "collections". Thankfully, they were fairly organized and selective (no stacks of margarine tubs and decades of magazines)-- but all those commemorative plates, spoons, bells-- you know, the collectibles made by the millions yet marketed as "limited editions" held no monetary value. Don't get me started on all the different gadgets advertised on tv at the same price, $19.95, since I was a kid. Who needs eight different coffee makers, all working (two still in the boxes), especially when you have switched to instant decaf?
As our parents aged and their lives transitioned, the dreaded task of clearing out their things, each and every time, was left entirely up to us. Siblings, various family members and charities were the primary recipients. My partner and I took photos of the things that held fond memories and only took a few things that would fit in our suitcases. Not living near them made the project difficult and expensive.
We have purposefully lived without clutter, collectibles, gadgets, multiple sets of dishes, glassware, sheets, towels... stuff that starts to own you instead of you owning it, for many years.
I don't know the origin but I truly believe in the saying that you will never see a hearse pulling a U-Hall trailer. Oh, and at least for us, when the time comes we won't even need the hearse.
As our parents aged and their lives transitioned, the dreaded task of clearing out their things, each and every time, was left entirely up to us. Siblings, various family members and charities were the primary recipients. My partner and I took photos of the things that held fond memories and only took a few things that would fit in our suitcases. Not living near them made the project difficult and expensive.
We have purposefully lived without clutter, collectibles, gadgets, multiple sets of dishes, glassware, sheets, towels... stuff that starts to own you instead of you owning it, for many years.
I don't know the origin but I truly believe in the saying that you will never see a hearse pulling a U-Hall trailer. Oh, and at least for us, when the time comes we won't even need the hearse.
4
Last June, when I'd made the decision to move out of my two-bedroom NYC apartment that I'd inhabited for 20 years, I was overcome by a desire to get rid of accumulated belongings that I did not absolutely love as well as things I no longer used. I've never had clutter, but I did have too many things all neatly in place. But still, a lot of stuff that no longer served me. By the time I'd finished selling furniture, unloading cartons of books daily on my stoop for others to scoop up, bagging up clothes for Goodwill and giving earrings and necklaces to nieces, when it was all done I felt lighter than air. It was an amazing feeling. Gone (I hope forever) is the need to impulse buy. Space to me is a great luxury!
8
You'll be back. Once a packrat, always a packrat! There's no such thing as even remission. That old dabil begins to get a grip right away! It starts with a knick knack with no usefulness that gives you a little kick! Before you know it there are bookshelves on your kitchen counter. I have new clothes that sit around in piles because there's no room in closets or bureau drawers. Sometimes I look around and I want to flee. I still the impulse. But maintaining two apartments, one for stuff, the other for me, starts me on a new accumulation jag. One solution is to find a way to eat those books on your shelves in the kitchen!
2
Clutter is inversely proportional to mobility.
12
I have a modicum of control of the house clutter. The barns and 20 acres...another story. What I notice I have been doing in recent times is to satisfy my "buy something" urge by buying food. Those purchases satisfy me, are not clutter per se, and are consumable by me and others. The current food-clutter problem is now...3 freezers full, enough to feed dozens for months, and no more room for more for cold storage from the grocery. Arrghhh...
5
I don't mean to be insensitive but three freezers full of food is hoarding, just as much so as the person with stacks of old magazines and 500 empty pill bottles and garbage bags of beanie babies.
Not to mention the fossil fuels being burned to keep those freezers cold.
Not to mention the fossil fuels being burned to keep those freezers cold.
6
We now have commercials to sell us extra space to store our junk. Yes, junk. Despite what writer has to say, it may not clear your mind but by all means, do not leave your junk to your children. Get rid of it!
7
Clutter has always been a problem— but mostly its not the problem at all.
Its the result of the problem.
likewise cluttering up isnt always bad if its done thoughtfully— and that is the hard part.
Its the result of the problem.
likewise cluttering up isnt always bad if its done thoughtfully— and that is the hard part.
4
All this clutter is going to be a terrible problem...for my children.
8
We're decluttering not to make our minds more spacious but our house. If you live in the land of million-dollar shacks, you simply need the room. I hate the act of decluttering: it's a chore. But afterwards, at least the dog has a place to lie down and the kid has a place to colour with her 12,000 crayons.
6
This morning my elderly father found a box of pasta. Dated 1989. When I suggested we throw it out, he got very annoyed, insisting that it's STILL GOOD. He thinks it's a waste of perfectly good food to throw it out. He said he's sorry he showed it to me because now he won't get to use it.
I know this little story isn't really about clutter. But it made me laugh so much I cried, so I thought I'd share it!
I know this little story isn't really about clutter. But it made me laugh so much I cried, so I thought I'd share it!
24
Pamela, perhaps you are missing the point, as per your tacitly stated sadness about ever achieving a state of "mindfulness."
Paring down means making room to ponder what truly represents us, on all levels. Letting go includes ditching socially conditioned ways of thinking and living that keep us trapped in someone else's idea(s) of what a fulfilling life "should" be. And you "doubt" ever achieving a state of authentic living? Sad.
Somehow you "suspect that the joy of ditching all of our stuff is just as illusory as the joy of acquiring it all was." You're really equating the two? Less stuff is less to pay for, clean, keep track of, think about, look at, and so on. "Less" opens the doorway to an expanded currency of more time instead of things.
Paring down means making room to ponder what truly represents us, on all levels. Letting go includes ditching socially conditioned ways of thinking and living that keep us trapped in someone else's idea(s) of what a fulfilling life "should" be. And you "doubt" ever achieving a state of authentic living? Sad.
Somehow you "suspect that the joy of ditching all of our stuff is just as illusory as the joy of acquiring it all was." You're really equating the two? Less stuff is less to pay for, clean, keep track of, think about, look at, and so on. "Less" opens the doorway to an expanded currency of more time instead of things.
4
The answer is simple: delete the Facebook and Twitter accounts, stop watching so much TV, and start meditating seriously, every day. There are free 10-day meditation courses you can take to get started. It's so worth it.
7
And stop posting comments on newspaper stories!
3
From the column: 'I can sit in an empty room, and still get nothing done.'
Perhaps Ms. Druckerman's difficulty is her idea that she must always be getting something done.
Perhaps Ms. Druckerman's difficulty is her idea that she must always be getting something done.
15
De-cluttering is often classic procrastination. It's just more fun to clean sometimes than it is to file taxes or work on that short story. Spend a little time working each day on what matters and clean house or not your happiness will increase. De-cluttering is just a mirror to consumerism, an individualistic reflex that temporarily readies the house for a new round of over-consumption, driven by expert marketing and a weak social fabric. It's a sad state. We should be happy with possessions and welcome real improvements to goods, but that would mean cell phones that could last 10 years instead of 2, and a different way of living for all of us.
69
Are you kidding? For most Americans, filing taxes or writing a short story is procrastination from having to face clutter!
7
I wasn't interested in reading the article, but the title made me think of my enjoyment of removing the clutter from my house. After 27 years of marriage and two grown children, it is easy to have accumulated a lot of “stuff”. What started my wife and I on our purge of “stuff” was listening to friends talk about how many dumpsters they filled cleaning out the homes of their recently deceased parents and the video that can be found at http://storyofstuff.org/.
4
First - how wonderful and exciting about your work with the Cahaba River - now that is Synchronicity!
Second, thank you for keeping in the know with these articles!
I just read this one and was trying to write the author, but don't want to go through all the log-in password first child stuff,
so, you, lucky you, will receive my response to her op-ed:
Thank you Pamela for addressing the de-cluttering fad sweeping the globe.
I am caught up in it and am using Marie Kondo's book as my guide. I have almost completed the throwing out old papers phase of tidying up.
Can you feel me tap dancing as I type this? I do feel better, freer, and memories of things long gone are appearing
and delighting me in my dreams and while awake, too.
Is this the answer to life? No! Is there AN answer to life? No!
But the little tidying up book does ask a fundamental question - does this bring me joy?
Yes, I thought the lycra mermaid pants would bring me joy, too - and they did for a time!
Letting them go and hoping they bring joy to someone else delights me to no end.
Your point about acquiring these items not doing what we had hoped is excellent.
However, discarding them with intention and even, as Marie Kondo directs, with gratitude
is working for me. Ms. Kondo promises no more tidying if done correctly.
And, I, for one, am already enjoying more time, silliness, and energy - and hey, I am only half way through the book!
Second, thank you for keeping in the know with these articles!
I just read this one and was trying to write the author, but don't want to go through all the log-in password first child stuff,
so, you, lucky you, will receive my response to her op-ed:
Thank you Pamela for addressing the de-cluttering fad sweeping the globe.
I am caught up in it and am using Marie Kondo's book as my guide. I have almost completed the throwing out old papers phase of tidying up.
Can you feel me tap dancing as I type this? I do feel better, freer, and memories of things long gone are appearing
and delighting me in my dreams and while awake, too.
Is this the answer to life? No! Is there AN answer to life? No!
But the little tidying up book does ask a fundamental question - does this bring me joy?
Yes, I thought the lycra mermaid pants would bring me joy, too - and they did for a time!
Letting them go and hoping they bring joy to someone else delights me to no end.
Your point about acquiring these items not doing what we had hoped is excellent.
However, discarding them with intention and even, as Marie Kondo directs, with gratitude
is working for me. Ms. Kondo promises no more tidying if done correctly.
And, I, for one, am already enjoying more time, silliness, and energy - and hey, I am only half way through the book!
5
A juste mot for old girlfriends; merci: "clutter". And for prospective ones--"more clutter".
Must be getting old!
Must be getting old!
2
So clutter is but a symptom of deeper confusion. Big surprise ?
2
Sadly, the final possession to be tossed is one's corpse.
6
We’re also overwhelmed by the intangible detritus of 21st-century life: unreturned emails; unprinted family photos; the ceaseless ticker of other people’s lives on Facebook; the heightened demands of parenting; and the suspicion that we’ll be checking our phones every 15 minutes, forever.
Thank God I chose not to get a smartphone
Thank God I chose not to get a smartphone
6
I so need to declutter. Went from a 5500 sq ft Victorian to a 2000 sq ft mid century modern. We have rid ourselves of 90% of the stuff we had, but still our closets are full, we have some heirloom antiques still lurking about and far too much clothing. It's still too much.
4
I have my books, and so does my wife, with my old science fiction magazines and when get them in order and out of the moving boxes I can look up any short story I care to read again. Stacks of photographs from world travels are in there with class papers and financial records. No garbage. No stacks on the floor - all is in a basement that is quite sufficient to hold the stuff.
5
I love my stuff. There are memories attached to everything, my children, my childhood. I have boxes of my babies' clothes. I have often gone to those boxes to declutter and to donate these items, but instead find myself sitting amidst these tiny articles of clothing and baby toys, vividly remembering my child's first words, their first steps. I can remember how they smelled as I look at my favorite onesie. Then I stuff everything back in the box and look forward to the future when I can do it all again.
17
The key ingredient to a Stuff Cure is knowing what to keep. Is it
currently functional,
really valuable, or
outrageously sentimental?
Everything else becomes a candidate to unstuff from your life.
currently functional,
really valuable, or
outrageously sentimental?
Everything else becomes a candidate to unstuff from your life.
5
When I moved from my house to my smaller condo with little storage, I ended up giving most of my stuff away that didn't go with the garage sale. Later, I moved to larger digs with a yard. I started to find that I'd given away things that I actually needed! It's possible to go too far.
6
After I read this article, I moved my basket of folded laundry from my living room to my bedroom - gosh, it felt good. Tomorrow I will put the laundry in my dresser.
10
Moving is the secret to clearing away excess. When you gotta pack it up, pick it up, put it down, unpack it and find a place to put it, the hard choices are easy to make. I'm famously ruthless with letting go of possessions and get invited by friends to help streamline spaces.
Nonetheless, I have a lot a hobbies, and l-o-v-e all the accessories that go with each one, but I'm also a bit of an organizational freak, so I can have all of those things without it being "clutter."
Nonetheless, I have a lot a hobbies, and l-o-v-e all the accessories that go with each one, but I'm also a bit of an organizational freak, so I can have all of those things without it being "clutter."
4
Tax means taxonomy, so yesterday was the time of compiling lists of such as charitable donations. This was my opportunity for celebrating the uses and joy those many objects my lovely Lady had packed up for ST Anthony over the year, to lament their loss.
I could not think of a single object.
I could not think of a single object.
3
Well, that certainly fits the stereotype: a book about being organized is a best-seller specifically in Germany, Japan and two other Asian nations. And the US, which has many descendants from all of these countries. I couldn't help laughing. I lived in both Germany and Japan for years, and I did find a greater sense of tidiness and organization there than in most places. I suppose stereotypes start in a seed of truth.
7
Many years ago when I lived in Ithaca, NY I discovered an old-timer who lived way out in the countryside who was a beekeeper and sold his own homemade honey. He was a real character, unlike anyone I had met in my predictable suburban childhood. "Honey Bill" would spin stories and keep me enthralled for hours with his tall tales. He was also a hoarder. His rickety old farmhouse was filled to the gills with old magazines, broken furniture and mysterious farm tools and implements that probably hadn't been used in decades. When I commented on all his stuff he looked at me with a twinkle in his eye and proudly stated, "If you always save everything, you'll never have nothing." Not exactly my philosophy of life, but it worked for Honey Bill.
11
This capitalization of decluttering and its attendant call to buy more "new" things, including books, foods, and experiences to help you "purify" yourself is at its apotheosis reminiscent of Singer's Satan in Goray and some Hawthorne-Thoreau amalgam of sincere, absurd Puritanism. Yes, we are constantly bombarded by screeching calls to buy things we didn't know we wanted or needed, from the annoying pop-ups in the New York Times to wasteful circulars in our mailboxes. And yes, as one with a mother who hoards everything from soup cans to pants, and who finds a trip to the mall at Christmas time a near-religious experience while I find it closer to a visit to the lip of Hell, we do have too much stuff. However, to work I need some clutter and spreading out; others may need their space clean-slated. It's a pain hauling, thinking about, or curating it. The best way to get rid of it is to move, knowing that accumulation will start again. Collecting things, including books, pretty objects, and mementos of experiences, is a human aesthetic. However, there's no glory or purity in getting rid of everything either; the claims for this process are over-stated for most people. The hardest thing is balance; you do need to cull, especially books and papers(and seashells!), or whatever you have to much of in an on-going way. But life and thinking does not improve by purging either the body or the basement. I agree with Ms. Druckerman's conclusion.
59
If the NY Times editorials were less well written and the comments not so darned good, I would feel less compelled to spend an hour or more most mornings reading them, and my life would be much less cluttered!!!!!!
228
and much less interesting....my excuse this morning is that we're snowbound with the university closed for the second day and the looming threat of freezing to death when the cold moves in. ....This is in Lexington..the mind boggles at the thought of Boston.
4
As a minimalist who is married to a hoarder (and now with little hoarder children), my work is never done.
81
After nearly 40 years of family life and acquisition, we've been there and done that, so we're keeping more than a hundred boxes of our adult childrens' "good stuff" in the attic and garage, with an ever-changing, but now dwindling, mass of other good stuff in two smallish storage units.
Naturally, my own "good stuff" - a hand woven coverlet made by an itinerant weaver in country NY state in the 1840s, quilts made by or bought by family members over seven decades, 19th century cooking tools - are in the house with me.
The point of my rambling is that I'd like to ask you to remember that for the rest of your family, just owning that specific stuff brings joy, comfort, a clear sense of being grounded in our own history - and for your kids (as for my kids), the certainty that your parents care enough about you, to take good care of your stuff.
Naturally, my own "good stuff" - a hand woven coverlet made by an itinerant weaver in country NY state in the 1840s, quilts made by or bought by family members over seven decades, 19th century cooking tools - are in the house with me.
The point of my rambling is that I'd like to ask you to remember that for the rest of your family, just owning that specific stuff brings joy, comfort, a clear sense of being grounded in our own history - and for your kids (as for my kids), the certainty that your parents care enough about you, to take good care of your stuff.
2
“I had three pieces of limestone on my desk, but I was terrified to find that they required to be dusted daily, when the furniture of my mind was all undusted still, and threw them out the window in disgust.” -- Henry Thoreau
4
I once received a new address notice from a friend: "We've moved! The old house was full." Maybe that's the solution. Just sell your home with contents included.
5
Well written -- less clutter and great ending!
2
Please don't make the NYT opinion page the equivalent of the NPR voice essay.
2
I think you are unduly pessimistic at the end, but it was an excellent apercu.
2
"But is it really satisfying?" A resounding Yes!
5
That dissatisfaction that dogs you when the physical clutter is reduced is important. It's not that reducing clutter automatically makes you happy; it's that it frees you to get on with doing what you need to do, and then you will find more satisfaction. At least that's the story back here in the overflowing zone.
5
Blaming China for our clutter? That seems pretty xenophobic.
3
"Less may be more, but it’s still not enough."
Great sentence.
Great sentence.
3
I. love hotel rooms. There's no clutter. They gentle the mind. No clutter, no responsibility, free of one"s. own important collections. (in my case, boxes of books) , projects left undone blah, blah, blah, I'll never remember you once you're gone. Free at last. I've learned my lesson. Or...
6
Being clean and tidy is great. But blank canvases beg to be painted upon...
3
For a somewhat silly but practical way to get your life in order go to Flylady.com. She will make you crazy with the cuteness sometimes but the process is just chipping away (you can do anything for 15 minutes a day), and the musings and messages reflect her philosophy of not beating yourself up - "You're not behind, just jump right in where you are now", "Your house didn't get that way overnight and it won't get cleaned overnight"
6
I also recommend the original clutter buster, Fly Lady. After more than 10 years I still go back to read basic Flylady.com She does not preach minimalism. She points out how clutter robs you of your time without the guilt of not being a perfectionist, zen minimalist. Eleven years ago a hoarder friend had sent me torn magazine pages with craft ideas. On the reverse side of that magazine page was a Fly Lady article.
"You can not organize clutter. You can only throw it away. CHOAS Can't have any one over syndrome. Clutter robs you of your time with friends and family and stops you from going on vacation." Fly Lady Her followers write in and say how even their children now cherish family time rather than shopping for more stuff.
"You can not organize clutter. You can only throw it away. CHOAS Can't have any one over syndrome. Clutter robs you of your time with friends and family and stops you from going on vacation." Fly Lady Her followers write in and say how even their children now cherish family time rather than shopping for more stuff.
4
Yes! I've always had as my watchword "A clean desk is a sign of a sick mind."
6
I agree with you about digital clutter - all those photos that need to be sorted/deleted/organised. All the emails that I should store somewhere, versus the ones I should delete.
Still, one of the best de-cluttering devices ever is the iPad - all the unread magazines and books no longer sit on shelves, glaring at me, reminding me that I haven't got to them yet.
Still, one of the best de-cluttering devices ever is the iPad - all the unread magazines and books no longer sit on shelves, glaring at me, reminding me that I haven't got to them yet.
4
I love it!!!
1
We have written an insightful book on this topic: The Stuff Cure: How we lost 8,000 pounds of stuff for fun, profit, virtue, and a better world. Our book sells in the top 10% of all books on Amazon because it is a proven method. Learn more at www.stuffcure.com and watch the TedX talk "Getting to the right stuff"
3
My mother used to say: If you need something, shop in the basement before you go to the store.
14
Decluttering is like going on a diet. It's not a once and done thing. It's a new program for the rest of your life. Maintaining any organizational system requires work. You'll be putting time into following your neat system that you could be using to read books, for example, or write books, and what do you have to show for it? A nice collection of nothing!
4
But it's easier in the long run.
1
Pamela - you are such a keen observer and thinker. Keep these columns coming!
4
With the economic problems in recent years, a lot of people have lost their jobs and homes and lost their "clutter" without intending to throw it out. Having some old stuff around to remind you of where you came from, your grandmother etc., or how pretty you were when you were younger, is very comforting.
108
For the most part, my 'clutter' is files that I've been toting around the world on my computer disk drive.
But I seem to have a knack for deleting a file a couple of weeks before I need it again. Besides that, the effort of sorting through things is so much greater than the cost of buying a larger disk drive. So I just keep buying bigger drives.
I still remember when one Terabyte was an almost unimaginably vast amount of data. Recently I bought a three Terabyte drive and I'm considering a four Terabyte drive. But bigger drives don't take up more space! So why worry?
But I seem to have a knack for deleting a file a couple of weeks before I need it again. Besides that, the effort of sorting through things is so much greater than the cost of buying a larger disk drive. So I just keep buying bigger drives.
I still remember when one Terabyte was an almost unimaginably vast amount of data. Recently I bought a three Terabyte drive and I'm considering a four Terabyte drive. But bigger drives don't take up more space! So why worry?
4
Wondering what Sarah Lazarovic did with all those pictures she painted....
Seriously, purging has to bring about some sort of satisfaction, but not sure if the aftermath is as climacteric as we would wish, as the author points out. The kids look around and sigh and I know exactly what they're thinking - "she better get rid of this stuff before we have to!"
I got on a purging kick last winter and accidentally let a very favorite picture slip by and get thrown out. It was of a younger day when the kids (and myself) were so much younger - they were little, I was young. I used to drag it out every Christmas time as it was a Christmas time moment. The picture now gone forever. So - just be careful. Those purging rambunctious moments that take precedence to prove our "I'm not afraid to do this" need caution sometimes. I did miss getting it out at Christmas this year - much more than the boxes of ornaments, stars, lights, etc.....you get it.
Seriously, purging has to bring about some sort of satisfaction, but not sure if the aftermath is as climacteric as we would wish, as the author points out. The kids look around and sigh and I know exactly what they're thinking - "she better get rid of this stuff before we have to!"
I got on a purging kick last winter and accidentally let a very favorite picture slip by and get thrown out. It was of a younger day when the kids (and myself) were so much younger - they were little, I was young. I used to drag it out every Christmas time as it was a Christmas time moment. The picture now gone forever. So - just be careful. Those purging rambunctious moments that take precedence to prove our "I'm not afraid to do this" need caution sometimes. I did miss getting it out at Christmas this year - much more than the boxes of ornaments, stars, lights, etc.....you get it.
5
I inadvertently gave away a treasured Christmas book I'd had since childhood (and still set out under the tree each year) in my zeal to pare down. That was a couple of years ago and it still brings me near tears of frustration every time I unpack the holiday decor. A hasty "rambunctious purging moment" gone awry.
I have a modern-day knock off but it lacks the patina of age and memory.
I have a modern-day knock off but it lacks the patina of age and memory.
6
It is not that hard to own things and yet not be owned by your things. I am not a minimalist with an artificial limit to my possessions (100 things? Really? Why?) but try to live by the aphorism that "if you don't use it, need it, like it, or want it, then get rid of it."
6
Great article - and great conclusion! Thanks so much.
1
Purging your life of unused/unwanted/unneeded things is greatly liberating. For me, it was brought on by a triple trauma: my brother's untimely death, the unexpected death of my mother-in-law, followed by my mother being placed in a nursing home. When you see other person's possessions up close and personal, you realize how we've all been taken in by mass commercialism. It is also obvious that it becomes increasingly difficult for the elderly to tackle their hoard, however large or unruly.
I do not equate physical possessions with email and the like. It is easy to disconnect yourself from getting pings every second of the day, only to learn that some distant acquaintance had a bowl of soup. Sorry, not for me.
Ultimately, I disagree with the author's final premise. It's not that you emerge from clutter beaming with authenticity, but it does clear your mind of all those nagging thoughts in the "should do" category. It provides a relief that when you go, your heirs won't be shaking their heads wondering what in the world you did with your life.
I do not equate physical possessions with email and the like. It is easy to disconnect yourself from getting pings every second of the day, only to learn that some distant acquaintance had a bowl of soup. Sorry, not for me.
Ultimately, I disagree with the author's final premise. It's not that you emerge from clutter beaming with authenticity, but it does clear your mind of all those nagging thoughts in the "should do" category. It provides a relief that when you go, your heirs won't be shaking their heads wondering what in the world you did with your life.
12
Decluttering was on my top of the list for 2015. Together with other resolutions other useless things took it`s place.
Perfect column on a snowbound day for ode to joy into a practice of mindfulness.
Perfect column on a snowbound day for ode to joy into a practice of mindfulness.
5
I thought I invented the idea that the artist Lazorovic uses. I just keep a list of things that I would buy if I wanted to and it's satisfying enough that I don't need to buy the items.
I suppose to keep capitalism going, we'll have to buy better food grown locally, better clothes sewn locally, and lessons in how to do art and sports. I would like that.
I suppose to keep capitalism going, we'll have to buy better food grown locally, better clothes sewn locally, and lessons in how to do art and sports. I would like that.
6
It is not just the clutter that drags us down, but its cause: constant and unneeded accumulation.
3
Ms. Druckerman is correct in small part but grievously misguided in the balance.
Toyota's Taiichi Ohno often said that decluttering (as in the 5S: sort, set-in-order, sweep, standardize, sustain) was the foundation of the Toyota Production System. 5S will make your home happier, if you can execute that last S -- sustain.
But, as Mr. Ohno would have told her, Ms. Druckerman understates the values of avoidance of poor quality goods, including junk from Facebook/Twitter, and acquisition, instead, of quality stuff. The sine qua non of building cars, flying airplanes, or managing stuff, is controlling the quality and fitness of incoming material.
Let's stop buying poorly designed, poorly manufactured stuff: it's the raw material of clutter.
Toyota's Taiichi Ohno often said that decluttering (as in the 5S: sort, set-in-order, sweep, standardize, sustain) was the foundation of the Toyota Production System. 5S will make your home happier, if you can execute that last S -- sustain.
But, as Mr. Ohno would have told her, Ms. Druckerman understates the values of avoidance of poor quality goods, including junk from Facebook/Twitter, and acquisition, instead, of quality stuff. The sine qua non of building cars, flying airplanes, or managing stuff, is controlling the quality and fitness of incoming material.
Let's stop buying poorly designed, poorly manufactured stuff: it's the raw material of clutter.
6
There is the existing pool of clutter, and there are the little streams that feed it. It's as important to work on those little streams as it is on the pool (or dump). Think about the purpose of the object you are acquiring .. what specifically does it do for you? (makes me feel good, etc. are warning signs!). Focusing on the purpose can help reduce or stop the incoming stuff, while you slowly clean out the dump.
3
I have a photograph of our 1875 sq ft loft before we and our stuff moved in.
I want that space back!
I want that space back!
7
I have some keepsakes close to my heart which takes minimum space..a silver ring by my beloved uncle, a small crochet bag knitted by my aunt. The paintings by my aunt, mom are hanging in our walls. Then letters written by my Mom and Dad.
The biggest clutters are the photograph in the albums when all we had was simple cameras. Too many pictures I already started purging...so many of them pictures of folks I no longer have any connection with, why keep them ?
The biggest clutters are the photograph in the albums when all we had was simple cameras. Too many pictures I already started purging...so many of them pictures of folks I no longer have any connection with, why keep them ?
4
People who create with old photos might appreciate them; rather than adding to the landfills you might Google around for uses for old photographs.
3
Good article. The satisfaction of stuff is fleeting, as is the zen of having 'everything in its place'. I think your last paragraphs sum it up. We still live in time. Thanks.
7
The comments on this article are pure poetry. People can be so beautiful.
12
I think the tendency to keep stuff is partly driven by economic uncertainty. You never know when your finances might turn south and you won't be able to afford new stuff, so hey, why not keep the old stuff just in case. More people fall into this category now than at any time since the Great Depression.
And I've lost track of how many times I've finally gotten rid of something after months or years of not using or needing it, only to find that a week after I give it up, I need it. Aargh!
And I've lost track of how many times I've finally gotten rid of something after months or years of not using or needing it, only to find that a week after I give it up, I need it. Aargh!
31
I just got rid of a large ball created out of rubber bands, thinking "when was the last time I needed a rubber band?" naturally ... it was about a week after I gave away my entire stockpile.
7
Clutter fill a large spiritual void in many people's lives.
2
Utility. If one uses that "stuff" it is not (necessarily) clutter. Mind you, I did not say if it was useful', for everything is potentially 'useful', which is the primary excuse of the hoarder ("I might use that someday.") Yes. I might use those 47 empty boxes that I've accumulated over the last year along with that extra-large garbage bag of packing peanuts...but it's unlikely. Hence, it is garbage that needs to be recycled and put to *use*.
5
I think the uptick in the "decluttering conversation" can also be attributed to the large group of boomers reaching the point in their lives when "down sizing" requires some decluttering. Throw in the technology that allows us to peruse websites, articles and blogs about downsizing and decluttering, and you have a hot topic. But I agree, for some it may be a transformative experience, for the rest of us...it just leads to better sight lines.
17
Another factor inspiring that conversation: Many of us have now experienced clearing out the belongings of the first generation of parents who had the wherewithal to accumulate material possessions on a large scale. We have discovered what a massive undertaking it is and have vowed not to leave such a task to our heirs.
8
I'm preparing my home for the benefit of my family and especially my executrix so that the dumpster they hire will not be too large.
I'm old and recognize that I've lived far longer than I will live. So I have tried to rid myself of most of the things that, even though they once might have meant a great deal to me, probably will not to those I leave behind.
AND...it is far harder than I thought it would be when I first started. Decluttering often has taken the way of "do you want this" asked of everyone in the family. All 'no' it gets tossed. Any 'yes' and it becomes their problem.
After I'm gone, I am hoping that, as I said, the dumpster won't have to be too large to hold what they will throw away.
I'm old and recognize that I've lived far longer than I will live. So I have tried to rid myself of most of the things that, even though they once might have meant a great deal to me, probably will not to those I leave behind.
AND...it is far harder than I thought it would be when I first started. Decluttering often has taken the way of "do you want this" asked of everyone in the family. All 'no' it gets tossed. Any 'yes' and it becomes their problem.
After I'm gone, I am hoping that, as I said, the dumpster won't have to be too large to hold what they will throw away.
10
'...Decluttering often has taken the way of "do you want this" asked of everyone in the family. All 'no' it gets tossed. Any 'yes' and it becomes their problem...'
Having recently moved into a small apartment, which is the perfect size for just me, over past few months I have been selling many of my possessions on Craigslist or donating them to a thrift store. Every unwanted and/or unneeded item that exits my home for a better home makes me feel lighter and happier.
I prefer to do this alone, but if friends or family are around when I am purging my bookshelves or closets, one of them will inevitably ask, 'You're getting rid of that?'.
I offer it to them, 'Would you like it?'.
Occasionally I get a 'Yes' and everyone is happy, but usually (to my amusement) the person asking quickly steps back and shakes their head, so into the box it goes.
My boyfriend once wisely told me that for everything that comes in, something of equal size must go out, so every new item is a 'replacement item'. What beautiful vase am I willing to part with for this beautiful vase? Or book? Or sweater? Helps focus the mind.
Love it, use it, or let it go.
Having recently moved into a small apartment, which is the perfect size for just me, over past few months I have been selling many of my possessions on Craigslist or donating them to a thrift store. Every unwanted and/or unneeded item that exits my home for a better home makes me feel lighter and happier.
I prefer to do this alone, but if friends or family are around when I am purging my bookshelves or closets, one of them will inevitably ask, 'You're getting rid of that?'.
I offer it to them, 'Would you like it?'.
Occasionally I get a 'Yes' and everyone is happy, but usually (to my amusement) the person asking quickly steps back and shakes their head, so into the box it goes.
My boyfriend once wisely told me that for everything that comes in, something of equal size must go out, so every new item is a 'replacement item'. What beautiful vase am I willing to part with for this beautiful vase? Or book? Or sweater? Helps focus the mind.
Love it, use it, or let it go.
6
Wow, it's always a wee bit disappointing when trends catch up to what you've already practised for years, whether it's seasonal cooking and eating (started that in the 1980s with a dip into macrobiotics), staying in rented homes or flats instead of cookie-cutter hotels (yep, been doing that for around 15 years), or avoiding clutter by not accumulating too much STUFF (paging George Carlin) in the first place.
I suppose it's pointless to hope that people will stop living their lives through their smartphones (I have the dumbest phone on the market), but at least I can say I've avoided the ceaseless ticker of other people's lives by never joining Facebook in the first place.
Yep, I'm a snob about some things. There, I've said it first.
I suppose it's pointless to hope that people will stop living their lives through their smartphones (I have the dumbest phone on the market), but at least I can say I've avoided the ceaseless ticker of other people's lives by never joining Facebook in the first place.
Yep, I'm a snob about some things. There, I've said it first.
10
Thank you! Thank you! "We" are not all following the "ticker" of other people's lives on Facebook or checking "our" phones every 15 minutes. I have a "dumb" phone, too, and the volume is turned off most of the time. Anyone else remember eating a meal and looking the people at the table in the eye?
4
Last two paragraphs should be the first two. Also, this piece ignores the pathological clutterer, i.e., someone who phyically can't move around their house, because it is filled with junk. These types really do need to ditch their stuff.
4
I often look around my house and wonder how we ended up with all this STUFF. It is neatly organized and there is no clutter but there is A LOT of it. However, most of it are mementos of our life together, our travels, our joys. It brings me great pleasure to look at those items. In the storeroom, we have our camping and hiking gear and gardening equipment and supplies. We have books. Lots and lots of books.
What we don't have is junk. We don't accumulate because I am allergic to getting more stuff. We spent an entire year getting rid of the accumulated stuff in my parents' home. Every piece of garbage that every bank gave out with new accounts. Dozens of nail clippers, every bow and ribbon off every box. Every greeting card that ever came in the mail. Old magazines, stuff they received as wedding gifts and never used. And tons of tschotschkes. It was exhausting.
We don't bring it into the house unless we really need it. If we aren't using it, it goes. And yes, getting rid of stuff feels great.
What we don't have is junk. We don't accumulate because I am allergic to getting more stuff. We spent an entire year getting rid of the accumulated stuff in my parents' home. Every piece of garbage that every bank gave out with new accounts. Dozens of nail clippers, every bow and ribbon off every box. Every greeting card that ever came in the mail. Old magazines, stuff they received as wedding gifts and never used. And tons of tschotschkes. It was exhausting.
We don't bring it into the house unless we really need it. If we aren't using it, it goes. And yes, getting rid of stuff feels great.
7
We peaked when we built a beautiful house on 20 acres in the Sierra Nevada foothills, with a big barn garage to fill up with stuff, and lots of ground on which to put trailers, a yard tractor, wood chipper, a generator and a sailboat.
Then came the move downhill to a duplex in the city. All that outside stuff, and a lot of the inside stuff, had to go.
A few years later and another move--this time onto a 41-foot sailboat. Although we still had to keep a 10x20-foot storage unit for stuff, ALL the furniture was sold.
(The boat was named Buoyant by her first owner. After making fun of the name, we realized how symbolic it was of our new, far lighter, way of life.)
Finally our last big downsizing--choosing what stuff was important enough to box up, inventory, and ship 3,000 miles to our retirement home in Mexico. And the funny thing is that the most important items were things that might be at the very top of the Clutter list--those boxes of old photos, greeting cards and other bits that tell the stories of our lives, and our families' lives, going back decades.
Now we are settled far south of the border and our house has lots of space to fill up, but I think we'll resist the urge and let these important things that have been boxed up and hidden for so long and then shipped so far stand out.
Because there's stuff, and there's Stuff.
Then came the move downhill to a duplex in the city. All that outside stuff, and a lot of the inside stuff, had to go.
A few years later and another move--this time onto a 41-foot sailboat. Although we still had to keep a 10x20-foot storage unit for stuff, ALL the furniture was sold.
(The boat was named Buoyant by her first owner. After making fun of the name, we realized how symbolic it was of our new, far lighter, way of life.)
Finally our last big downsizing--choosing what stuff was important enough to box up, inventory, and ship 3,000 miles to our retirement home in Mexico. And the funny thing is that the most important items were things that might be at the very top of the Clutter list--those boxes of old photos, greeting cards and other bits that tell the stories of our lives, and our families' lives, going back decades.
Now we are settled far south of the border and our house has lots of space to fill up, but I think we'll resist the urge and let these important things that have been boxed up and hidden for so long and then shipped so far stand out.
Because there's stuff, and there's Stuff.
118
It may be a little off-base, but perturbing nonetheless to see another person say "Now that I live in Mexico..." or where-ever, and then note that with their handle they say they live in the USA. You can't have it both ways. If you choose to bail on the USA and make your life elsewhere, own up to it.
2
I used to be the top corporate and political speechwriter in Vancouver. My skills bought me a middle-class life -- wife, children, mortgage, what Zorba called "the full catastrophe." Then the children grew up and I said to my wife, "I'm going to wander around the world as a housesitter. You can come if you want."
So we sold or gave away everything of value and tossed the rest, and now it's more than seven years later and we're in a little village in the middle of Brittany, looking after a friendly dog and two cats. Last night, we tried couchenne, a Breton mead aperitif. Never heard of it until we got here.
We've been around the world, literally -- have lived in twelve countries and passed through a half a dozen others. We've paid no rent or utilities, although occasionally we've ponied up for car insurance. We get our clothes from thrift shops then give them back when it's time to pare down to a single suitcase and a carry-on. If we're staying somewhere for a few months, we invest in a waffle iron.
I've written and sold a dozen sf novels and short story collections since I took to the road . None of them are bestsellers, but I'm a lot happier spinning my offbeat tales for whatever they bring -- I love the fan emails -- than I was when I wordsmithed rhetoric for $200 an hour.
Freedom is worth more to me than any pile of possessions could ever be.
So we sold or gave away everything of value and tossed the rest, and now it's more than seven years later and we're in a little village in the middle of Brittany, looking after a friendly dog and two cats. Last night, we tried couchenne, a Breton mead aperitif. Never heard of it until we got here.
We've been around the world, literally -- have lived in twelve countries and passed through a half a dozen others. We've paid no rent or utilities, although occasionally we've ponied up for car insurance. We get our clothes from thrift shops then give them back when it's time to pare down to a single suitcase and a carry-on. If we're staying somewhere for a few months, we invest in a waffle iron.
I've written and sold a dozen sf novels and short story collections since I took to the road . None of them are bestsellers, but I'm a lot happier spinning my offbeat tales for whatever they bring -- I love the fan emails -- than I was when I wordsmithed rhetoric for $200 an hour.
Freedom is worth more to me than any pile of possessions could ever be.
280
That freedom includes freedom from your children?
2
This sounds both bracing and lovely but there nonetheless must be some sort of financial safety net beneath you that you are not revealing. Lucky you to be so free.
4
It would be a good education for his kids to visit him around the world.
1
My mother, who was just this side of a hoarder, died in December 2012 and my husband, who never threw anything away either, died 10 months later. I spent two weeks going through my mother's effluvia and it took my sister another 5 months to clear out her house to sell. In addition to a few furniture pieces I wanted to keep, my sister sent up 23 large moving cartons of my mother's teddybear collection -- at least 300 teddybears, most of them worth nothing because there is no secondary market for such things. I've given away, freecycled, and donated so many bears, clothing and jewelry from my mother's belongings, and comic books, old magazines, clothes never worn, etc. from my husband that I'm only starting now to go through my own stuff. As much as it saddens me that my husband's life is now distilled into three storage bins in the basement and a half-dozen dress shirts I can't bear to part with, I now look at my stuff through the prism of "Would I Want My Sister To Have To Deal With This?" On the plus side, I have friends enjoying comic books and magazines, people have furniture that they can use, animal shelters have money from selling teddybears, my colleagues at work wear my mother's costume jewelry, and there are men fighting their way back from adversity wearing my husband's suits to job interviews. All help me to feel better about these losses, but it is profoundly selfish to leave so much crap for your survivors to have to deal with.
429
It seems selfish to leave a lot of clutter for survivors to deal with after you die, but maybe people are doing the best they can.
3
My mother, who hasn't worn size-6 shoes since I was born in 1963, still has all of her size-6 shoes. She still has every coat she's ever bought, no matter how decrepit it is (regarding her parka from the early '60s: "It's perfect to go feed the birds in"). Her closets are so full that she has to dismantle their contents like a 3D jigsaw puzzle to get to anything. Her beds are supported by the stacks of catalogs & magazines from the last 25 years that she has hidden under the frames. When my daughter was born in 1998, as a gift I received my Snoopy towel from the early '70s...the pile was completely gone (the backing material had the ghostly print of Snoopy) & the "towel" wouldn't have absorbed more than a teaspoon of water. I dread having to sort through her home when the time comes.
11
Beautiful. You've captured my concerns re clutter. And you wrote a happy story about the futures of the belongings you had to curate.
To your point - I hope not to burden my survivors with the curating job.
To your point - I hope not to burden my survivors with the curating job.
6
It's not the stuff----it is our relationship to the stuff. If we understand that nothing we "own" is critical to health, productivity, and contribution to a civil society, we can use the things we own in a positive and healthy way. When the "stuff" becomes more important than our face to face relationships with family and the world, then we have entered the realm of the unhealthy.
1
After a lifetime of saving photos, documents, old letters, etc. for sentimental reasons, I've found scanning them into digital form helps me dispense with the physical items (even knowing I'd rarely consult the digital copies). And for sentimental objects -- the collection of clay items made by my daughter, my various old dolls, etc. -- I've discovered that just taking a photo of the stuff before giving it away has helped me declutter so much more!
5
Digital clutter is real clutter, so any decluttering efforts need to include both the earth and the "cloud." We can't let digital's "false invisibility" fool us into thinking it doesn't count.
For me the point of decluttering isn't to try to discover my "higher" self; rather, it's to help me better manage and take advantage of the limited time I have, both in the near term and over the arc of my life. It's about setting priorities and taking control of my own narrative. The more I can reduce unnecessary noise, the more I can focus on the signal I want to dominate the arc of my remaining life.
Nothing about this effort is easy - in fact, I often remark that simplifying one's life takes an incredible amount of work - but there is great satisfaction in it, as well as a sense of accomplishment and relief. Those things, along with the time that gets freed up to focus on what's most important, does indeed lead to joy.
For me the point of decluttering isn't to try to discover my "higher" self; rather, it's to help me better manage and take advantage of the limited time I have, both in the near term and over the arc of my life. It's about setting priorities and taking control of my own narrative. The more I can reduce unnecessary noise, the more I can focus on the signal I want to dominate the arc of my remaining life.
Nothing about this effort is easy - in fact, I often remark that simplifying one's life takes an incredible amount of work - but there is great satisfaction in it, as well as a sense of accomplishment and relief. Those things, along with the time that gets freed up to focus on what's most important, does indeed lead to joy.
8
No matter how many e-books and e-magazines are cluttering up our kindles they won't be hiding dust bunnies, lost pairs of glasses or that one piece of paper you actually do need. They won't make your home embarrassing to walk into. Digital clutter doesn't even begin to bring the level or chaos to ones life that actual clutter does. After seeing the tragedy that is real clutter, I know that any intellectual exercise in trying to compare the two is mostly invalid.
7
The issue I have is the emphasis on things ...either having them or not having them. It seems in both cases Ms. Druckerman talks about status and objects. Perhaps a focus on contentment, with or without things, would be closer to enough. Contentment and compassion would surely is enough.
2
Actually, I loved the line at the end about feeling 'overwhelmed by the intangible detritus of 21st century life." It's so true for me. I considered sharing it (with attribution, of course) on Facebook.
2
First - reducing unnecessary material possessions is a financially smart move. Develop the habit of accumulating less and you'll save more to spend on things that are relevant. Yes - rampant purchasing of cheap, low quality Chinese goods via Walmart and KMart led to households accumulating far more junk than they needed, by any measure. And in the long term, it also lead to a mentality that cheap, easily available goods will always "be there" so why pay a little more for quality? I went through a phase of buying cheaper kitchen utensils and pans and realized that my Lodge cookware and Kitchen Aid were outperforming the cheaper (or moderately cheaper) stuff. And 20 years down the line, it's the solid stuff that is still around while the cheaper tools are gone. Ridding ourselves of the need for cheap may also lead to better local manufacturing and recharging the US economy. We've made China rich enough, let work on the back home economy.
Second, the author says "Less may be more, but it’s still not enough." Perhaps, but the starting point is to declutter... and it will work more of the time than not. The physical freedom gained from wining back your space from the junk is only a first step. But it frees up your mind from having to worry about the possessions. And that's a big first step towards spiritual freedom and enrichment.
Second, the author says "Less may be more, but it’s still not enough." Perhaps, but the starting point is to declutter... and it will work more of the time than not. The physical freedom gained from wining back your space from the junk is only a first step. But it frees up your mind from having to worry about the possessions. And that's a big first step towards spiritual freedom and enrichment.
9
Maybe it's an easier way for us to lose weight than all that exercise and calorie counting we're supposed to do.
4
Now, in some well-off circles, people boast about how little they own, or curate small collections of carefully selected items.
Maybe the wealthy are secretly thinking it will be easier to fit through the eye of the needle once they have less stuff.
Maybe the wealthy are secretly thinking it will be easier to fit through the eye of the needle once they have less stuff.
14
Besides the distraction that clutter provides and I could well get rid of, my primary goal in de-cluttering is to spare my children the task of some day going through all my possessions. I want to sift the "important" from the "unimportant" for them. My jewelry box, for example, contains some heirlooms and some junk. How are they to know the difference between their great-grandmother's broach and one I picked up at a yard sale?
Clutter itself is not the problem, although will admit to enjoying living without when I'm traveling. The problem is in what you keep. My bother-in-law said it perfectly: keep only what is beautiful or useful. I would add to that: keep also sentimental objects that bring you memories and joy.
Chuck the rest or some day your kids will be cursing you as they wade through it all.
Clutter itself is not the problem, although will admit to enjoying living without when I'm traveling. The problem is in what you keep. My bother-in-law said it perfectly: keep only what is beautiful or useful. I would add to that: keep also sentimental objects that bring you memories and joy.
Chuck the rest or some day your kids will be cursing you as they wade through it all.
8
Less clutter but more throwing away. I have a cluttered cabinet of bags and upper wares but then i can go to the grocery store and buy most things bulk. My point being, Americans create more trash than anyone per capita, and that is a lot of "stuff". Victorians hoarded doodads in an attempt to stave off death, that was ineffective. Today it is popular to pretend death doesn't exist at all. When are we going to start living honestly?
2
My aversion to clutter arose after cleaning out my parent's house before they moved to a smaller apartment, including emptying an attic that they hadn't been able to climb up into for 30 years. I'm never doing this to my kid, I thought. I came home and began 'paring,' and I haven't stopped.
16
Books are my main clutter, but they're also crucial to my life. Unfortunately, many of the books I want are not out digitally, and I prefer paper to electronic pages anyway, so the volumes do pile up. I donate boxes to the Vietnam Vets of America; others, I have a harder time giving away.
I do believe that in seeing the titles on the bookshelves, some memory of the contents is probably awakened in the brain; or maybe, I'm just justifying the clutter.
I do believe that in seeing the titles on the bookshelves, some memory of the contents is probably awakened in the brain; or maybe, I'm just justifying the clutter.
5
The precious one in search of a modern day, "Forty acres and a mule," cure for ennui, somehow always finds a circular path back to her unsolvable heart. As much as a rose has thorns and battles the indignities of blight upon its perfectly scented petals, there is still a wonderment about it's existence. Just as the Hebrew word, "Shalom," has multiple meanings including peace, completeness, prosperity, welfare and both hello and goodbye, the rose is content to peacefully co-exist with outside forces plotting its demise. The rose doesn't seek to create problems outside its perfect existence. It simply exists like the word "Shalom," balancing precariously on an absurdly pink cloud above the Mediterranean sea coast.
1
"A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone." -- Henry Thoreau
"Our life is frittered away by detail. An honest man has hardly need to count more than his ten fingers, or in extreme cases he may add his ten toes, and lump the rest. Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand; instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb nail. In the midst of this chopping sea of civilized life, such are the clouds and storms and quicksands and thousand-and-one items to be allowed for, that a man has to live, if he would not founder and go to the bottom and not make his port at all, by dead reckoning, and he must be a great calculator indeed who succeeds. Simplify, simplify." -- Henry Thoeau
"Our life is frittered away by detail. An honest man has hardly need to count more than his ten fingers, or in extreme cases he may add his ten toes, and lump the rest. Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand; instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb nail. In the midst of this chopping sea of civilized life, such are the clouds and storms and quicksands and thousand-and-one items to be allowed for, that a man has to live, if he would not founder and go to the bottom and not make his port at all, by dead reckoning, and he must be a great calculator indeed who succeeds. Simplify, simplify." -- Henry Thoeau
2
Over the last five years (and several moves) I have gradually and substantially reduced the amount of stuff I own, through yard sales, donations, the trash bin, and gifts. Moving frequently will really help you focus on what you need and don't need. At this point I am running much lighter and leaner than I had been, and it feels unbelievably great. Less to clean and I can find what I need. Perhaps many of us had bought too much stuff due to the onslaught of advertising, commercialism, consumerism, and an attempt to fill holes in our hearts.
10
The world seems divided into those who file by category and those who file by geography, and they often seem to marry. I've always felt tho' that categoricalness clutters creativity.
The need to keep a lot of useless stuff is a sign of financial (or other) insecurity. It might be worth something someday. I might need it.
When I worked for the US census in 2010 I visited the rich and the poor and everyone in between. When you walk up on the porch, and it is filled with old TV's, broken furniture and other detritus the occupants are probably poor. When you walk into a sparsely furnished house with lots of open space it is generally a sign of wealth.
When I worked for the US census in 2010 I visited the rich and the poor and everyone in between. When you walk up on the porch, and it is filled with old TV's, broken furniture and other detritus the occupants are probably poor. When you walk into a sparsely furnished house with lots of open space it is generally a sign of wealth.
20
I agree that just getting rid of clutter isn't enough. I'm not one of those people who believes in counting my possessions to reach a magic number, for instance. I do, however, feel that decluttering can open up a new world of opportunities.
Because we spent a few years slowly getting rid of about half of what we own, we've been able to move to a much smaller home. This frees up time as well as money.
My husband and I have been spending much of our new free time taking long walks together - good for our relationship and for our health. Some of the money will be used for travel; some is being set aside for retirement.
Since we have less stuff, and aren't all that attached to most of what we've kept, we're toying with a bunch of interesting ideas for the early years of retirement that would not have seemed like options a few years ago.
On a less practical note, we both feel happier in a way that isn't explained by saving time or money. We feel lighter and freer.
Because we spent a few years slowly getting rid of about half of what we own, we've been able to move to a much smaller home. This frees up time as well as money.
My husband and I have been spending much of our new free time taking long walks together - good for our relationship and for our health. Some of the money will be used for travel; some is being set aside for retirement.
Since we have less stuff, and aren't all that attached to most of what we've kept, we're toying with a bunch of interesting ideas for the early years of retirement that would not have seemed like options a few years ago.
On a less practical note, we both feel happier in a way that isn't explained by saving time or money. We feel lighter and freer.
5
I must admit my most recent "de-cluttering" involved reducing my NYT, New Yorker and Economist subscriptions to "digital". I no longer have stacks of newsprint and weekly magazines making me feel guilty when my actual life prevented me from reading them. Of course, I now feel free to expand my subscription list to other publications whose articles I read, but never often enough to want to add another few inches to the stacks. Replacing physical clutter with digital clutter may seem like progress, but I agree with others who commented that digital clutter can be just as annoying.
10
Clutter is the result of dysfunctional coping mechanisms. Anxiety about overcommitment or debt can be temporarily relieved by shopping which leads to more anxiety and debt and more shopping.
6
Almost five years ago, my home was totaled. Half was destroyed and half left unrepairable. Many of my possessions were lost; some were salvaged. I didn't get to choose. It was not the optimal way to declutter. I realized that there is a comfort in being surrounded by familiar objects accumulated during one's life, even if there is too much of it.
133
There was a NYTimes video interview with Dr. Ruth Westheimer that I thought provided thoughtful insight into how some people relate to what others might see as "clutter" in their living space. It had to do with providing both the comfort of a nest and the strength of a launching pad, as I remember what she said; my memory may be inaccurate, but I know I thought she had some good points that often get overlooked in discussion of these issues.
7
The best way to identify a real Yankee is by counting the stuff in the barn or basement after the subject's death. The more stuff, the more the departed was a Yankee. If the stuff is books and inherited furniture, it was an erudite Yankee. If the stuff is clothes and tchotchkes, it was an impersonator from away.
65
Hmmm...In another post here, I noted that I have less than half the "stuff" (including books and furniture) of a couple of years ago. I can count four old family pieces -- half the previous number -- and they all have a use and purpose (very Yankee). Yankees wouldn't waste usable stuff, but try to find it a home elsewhere if it is good material. I recognize that it is too easy to let the amount of "good" stuff creep up on you. I also have less than half the books -- a true erudite Yankee knows the value of the Internet and is no Luddite (there is an exception for the few exceptional books and historical items). Yankees like to be reasonably comfortable and spartan (keeping the winter thermostat relatively low -- save the environment, health, and money) and keep their long underwear forever.
Or maybe it's just that I am a Quaker Yankee, still revolting against my Puritan forebears.
Or maybe it's just that I am a Quaker Yankee, still revolting against my Puritan forebears.
2
Clutter is the expression of a culture that has replaced meaningful pursuits with shopping. We've plundered the earth for this clutter, and now we're like King Midas. We wanted wealth, and what we got was death. Getting rid of clutter is about something much bigger than just creating a restful living space. What we really need to get rid of is the whole economy that exists for the purpose of making us buy things.
411
Spot-on.
1
Quaint.
1
I think we give away a lot of our power when we say the economy makes us buy things. It doesn't. People have choices and one can choose to get off the conspicuous consumption train.
4
Ms. Druckerman, what a great article. A lot of us in the northeast have been getting pounded by snow and have been house bound off and on for a few weeks. Not only is "cabin fever" kicking in for me, I feel suffocated just looking around the house. I have so much stuff. A lot of it is definitely not junk but a lot of it is. And my house is on the larger side so you never really notice until its all you have to look at.
Couple that with the fact I work from home anyway which means I am used to my clients thinking that my hours of operation are.....constant! I don't wake up to an alarm clock, I wake up to the buzzing notification that while I slept for a few hours, I received about forty emails (work related, make it triple high double digits of I include the junk). Being inundated constantly with clutter of any kind, work, possession, children needing your attention) is extremely stressful. Lightening any of those things is a positive move. I'm actually motivated to make that my project today in between shoveling.
Couple that with the fact I work from home anyway which means I am used to my clients thinking that my hours of operation are.....constant! I don't wake up to an alarm clock, I wake up to the buzzing notification that while I slept for a few hours, I received about forty emails (work related, make it triple high double digits of I include the junk). Being inundated constantly with clutter of any kind, work, possession, children needing your attention) is extremely stressful. Lightening any of those things is a positive move. I'm actually motivated to make that my project today in between shoveling.
11
I would add that the crusade against clutter is actually just another manifestation of self-righteousness. These crusades divide (surprise!) by political leanings, and this one is particular to the left: The conservative red-state blue-collar home is crammed with the sons' high school football trophies, overstuffed chairs, kitschy collectibles, etc. The liberal's living room is streamlined Ikea and a rug that's whitewhitewhite.
Just one more thing to beat someone else over the head with. Behold, I ascend toward my 'shining authentic self' as my possessions drop away, as Dante discarded his sins climbing the Mount of Purgatory: while you, poor unenlightened sap, wallow in your material goods.
As for me, I will die surrounded by my possessions and take as many with me as I can. They bring me authentic pleasure long after I have aged out of sex appeal and have no money left to lend, and 'friends' and 'lovers' have gone their way, and well after my memories of experiences have grown vague.
Feel free to feel superior.
Just one more thing to beat someone else over the head with. Behold, I ascend toward my 'shining authentic self' as my possessions drop away, as Dante discarded his sins climbing the Mount of Purgatory: while you, poor unenlightened sap, wallow in your material goods.
As for me, I will die surrounded by my possessions and take as many with me as I can. They bring me authentic pleasure long after I have aged out of sex appeal and have no money left to lend, and 'friends' and 'lovers' have gone their way, and well after my memories of experiences have grown vague.
Feel free to feel superior.
28
As a serial organizer and de-clutterer, I find the topic endlessly interesting. Being in the empty nester stage of life, this topic always seems to come up in conversations among my friends, some of whom are moving to smaller quarters and others who are staying put. I found the end of this article a little depressing, but it does ring true. Maybe it's not fewer teapots that we crave, it's fewer distractions of all sorts.
10
Hoarding is an illness and i have been a witness to the chaos it creates in the life of those affected. I am a neat person by nature and enjoy the feeling of having just what is necessary, but also enjoy having a few possessions that are there only for the pleasure of having them, mostly for their aesthetic value.
Disorganization is another issue. People who are disorganized are so in their physical space and in their mental space. Organizing the physical space may help, but just for a time. It is organizing the mental space what will help in the long run. That is just much more difficult than throwing away accumulated stuff. That means not succumbing to the temptation of the so called social media. It also means planning ahead with space for the unexpected events that tend to disorganize our lives. It means you have to know what you want to do with your life but also you know that life brings a lot of surprises and you must be ready to grab the moment and make the most of it. Just throwing away accumulated objects and organizing your house will not work the magic.
Disorganization is another issue. People who are disorganized are so in their physical space and in their mental space. Organizing the physical space may help, but just for a time. It is organizing the mental space what will help in the long run. That is just much more difficult than throwing away accumulated stuff. That means not succumbing to the temptation of the so called social media. It also means planning ahead with space for the unexpected events that tend to disorganize our lives. It means you have to know what you want to do with your life but also you know that life brings a lot of surprises and you must be ready to grab the moment and make the most of it. Just throwing away accumulated objects and organizing your house will not work the magic.
110
Visit a farmer, a mechanic, a carpenter, an artist or an experimental scientist and you will find clutter everywhere. Broken machinery. Bits and pieces of old stuff stored in bottles. Odd tools that are needed once in a while. A scientist at Los Alamos told me that periodically when a new lab director comes in, he orders people to clean up the clutter and throw away the broken old equipment. After that nothing gets done for months because experiments can no longer be assembled from bits and pieces of old equipment.
People who make a living building things are the ones who keep the world running. They put food on your table and electricity in your wires. They cannot afford the luxury of the "minimalist lifestyle."
People who make a living building things are the ones who keep the world running. They put food on your table and electricity in your wires. They cannot afford the luxury of the "minimalist lifestyle."
43
There is a difference between clutter in a workshop and clutter in a home/
3
I'll bet that anything pursued obsessively robs the pursuer of satisfaction and joy. No doubt one could become just as agitated trying to get organized as one could surrounded by clutter. The pursuit of "stuff equilibrium" may take longer if there's years of accumulation, but once you get there, staying there should be relatively simple and stress-free. Consume only what you need and replace only what breaks.
I've seen thousands of people change their lives and enjoy a sense of spaciousness and freedom by getting rid of clutter and focusing on what's important to them ... which was seldom the stuff to begin with. In most cases it's misplaced intimacy. Once they identified or remembered what they actually valued in life, it was relatively easy to make that the focal point and eliminate the physical obstacles standing between them and their happiness. Maybe it's a question of trying too hard to be perfect rather than organized? www.andrewmellen.com
I've seen thousands of people change their lives and enjoy a sense of spaciousness and freedom by getting rid of clutter and focusing on what's important to them ... which was seldom the stuff to begin with. In most cases it's misplaced intimacy. Once they identified or remembered what they actually valued in life, it was relatively easy to make that the focal point and eliminate the physical obstacles standing between them and their happiness. Maybe it's a question of trying too hard to be perfect rather than organized? www.andrewmellen.com
5
Well, that makes sense, particularly when taken into consideration with what I found to be helpful in dealing with clutter: moving and divorce. Used wisely, divorce can actually be a great way to get rid of lots of shuhh, stuff.
4
I'm surprised there's no mention of the storage unit boom in this article. Storage facilities have been common in cities for decades because many people live in small apartments, but I was surprised to see them start springing up in the countryside several years ago. It seems that when the garage and basement are full people are willing to pay a sizable monthly fee for a place to store their cheap plastic possessions from China via Walmart. This has spawned another weird television phenomenon: reality shows about auctions of the contents of abandoned storage units. I moved from a seven room house to a one bedroom apartment a few years ago and I'm still downsizing. I still have boxes of old papers to sort through, but I deaccessioned about three quarters of my books, a third of my yarn stash and lots of old clothing. It was very satisfying and even somewhat lucrative. A used bookstore bought many of my books and I donated others to the local library booksale and clothes to a nonprofit thrift store. Yard sales brought in several hundred dollars for furniture that wouldn't fit in my new home. The donations were deductible. I gave away many other possessions, and recycled what I could.
11
Perhaps the human-centered goal of achieving elusive "joy" or "mindfulness" through decluttering is irrelevant. With ever-growing garbage patches in our oceans and a planet choking on pollution in the air, land, and water, we should be consuming less and "ditching all of our stuff" (better yet, let's not manufacture all this "stuff" in the first place, since its production takes a toll on the planet during its production and afterwards when it is cast off) for the sake of the environment and our collective well-being...
6
I keep a bemused mental list of things that should never be manufactured again, due to their ubiquity in homes, on thrift store shelves and at garage sales, including but not limited to: coffee mugs, t-shirts, wicker baskets, bud vases, popcorn tins and plastic children's toys.
15
We copied over 400 CDs using the highest import quality in iTunes on our computer, then we donated the entire CD collection to the public library. We now actually get to enjoy our music collection far more than when we had the physical media. We also loaded photographs into the computer where we can easily find them and view them on computer or on TV via AirPlay.
5
I am a part-time dealer in antiques and collectibles so I have a somewhat different perspective on this topic than many. I basically buy and sell lots of things so I can afford to have "better" things in my home. Curating is an over used word but I think it is appropriate for what I am doing. I enjoy the shared spaces of my home much more and I see my trading up as an ongoing project. That said, the ever growing pile of clothes in my bedroom is a constant source of agitation. I need to be bring myself to give up the clothes I have not worn in ages or have never worn because I am waiting to fit in them again. I have to embrace the concept that the clothes overfilling my closet are easily replaceable and I really do have to limit myself to what I wear now. Easier said than done.
7
I enjoyed this piece, especially about how the different cultures experience clutter. The best part, however, is the last paragraph. Sure, let's be mindful of what we acquire, but let's not make decluttering our lives' mission. (By the way, the last sentence of the last paragraph is very nice, too.)
2
For a great humor routine on this, google 'George Carlin's stuff." On a more serious note, there are two topics here: one is about accumulating so many unneeded and unused things that simply get in the way of our lives (have a look at garages in Texas filled with unused junk, requiring cars be parked outside and storage units rented for the stuff that should be in garages); the other is about our popular culture and its alienating, anxiety causing, wastefulness. Neither are hopeless problems. They are related to a materialism that says shopping in and of itself is fun, possessing goods will make you happy, and what you already have is out-dated. This is largely a product of advertising and the needs and "mindlessness" of a culture manufactured by greed and symbolic of an education increasingly devoid of a soul and increasingly devoted to those who push their products on us. As noticed in the article, even family gets minimized in such a world.
6
Good article. It is very important for people, if they are fortunate, to create an environment with light and space. If one has time, or can make the time to rethink what is important to them, becoming organized can be a joyous and creative endeavor. Folders, baskets, pottery and plants can help.
5
I ride a bicycle and a motorcycle, I play guitar, I like to hike and ski, and I have a small library of books. Activities associated with these things bring me joy.
I cherish and maintain the material objects that enable me to pursue these these interests, and I take pleasure in keeping everything organized and functional. The number of my possessions seems irrelevant. Daily quality of life is a better yardstick.
I cherish and maintain the material objects that enable me to pursue these these interests, and I take pleasure in keeping everything organized and functional. The number of my possessions seems irrelevant. Daily quality of life is a better yardstick.
12
This is actually consistent with Marie Kondo's philosophy. If an item 'sparks joy,' as yours evidently (and wonderfully) do, then it's something you should keep. She's really more about not hanging onto stuff that has no purpose, functional, spiritual, or otherwise, and, like you, cherishing those items that do.
3
I recall the cluttered homes of my grandmothers, filled with the objects that come from family life unfolding over decades. Those homes were cozy and inviting, filled as they were with pictures, books, and objects that had strong associations for everyone. A grand kid who needed materials for a school project always knew where to look because grandma had a bit of everything, string, buttons, paper, yarn, bric-a-brac of all sorts. There were old puzzles and games, books and photographs, old magazines, and comfy chairs to sit in and warmth. I hope to emulate grandma's cluttered home and am well on my way, to my (and hopefully others') comfort and pleasure.
17
My possessions didn't clutter up my house. I moved most of them in two shifts, 2006 as I moved overseas and rented the place, and when I sold the house in 2008. I didn't come back to live in the city where the stuff was stored and it took me until this year to get around to emptying the storage units.
There was little that I wanted and nothing that I needed. So after approximately $17,000 in rental fees for the units, I gave away about 95% of my stuff. An expensive lesson, but I am getting along just fine with much less.
There was little that I wanted and nothing that I needed. So after approximately $17,000 in rental fees for the units, I gave away about 95% of my stuff. An expensive lesson, but I am getting along just fine with much less.
14
I am all over the map when I read these comments and I jump into each person's world. I own a store and I sell stuff so the topic is always on my mind. Family china, for instance what to do with the tea set my dad brought my mom from an overseas stint during the war. There were many jokes made about this particular tea set and that dad was lucky that is the only thing he brought home. I doubt tea has ever been drunk from it. I know I have not and I also do not have the space or desire to show it off in a glass cabinet. My daughter in her tiny Brooklyn apartment does not want it. Stuff is complicated or I make it that way and I appreciate all the confusing/clear humanity here. It is making me deal.
4
A key step is, I think, to stop or at least slow down the acquisition of new stuff. Then one can more systematically start getting rid of old stuff without feeling out of control. Of course there are times in one's life when there is a specific motivation or deadline for getting rid of old stuff, e.g. when moving homes, when a child grows up and leaves, when an older relative passes on. The reverse is also true, that there are times when acquisition is beyond our control. Of course, that happens when we inherit things from said older relative, but also, e.g., at Christmas when the obligatory gift exchange leaves us with lots of things we really do not want, including "stocking stuffers." Really so much better to give and receive consumable gifts, whether food or gift certificates to movie theaters or restaurants or spas.
7
'...but also, e.g., at Christmas when the obligatory gift exchange...'
Which can be changed to a 'under $20 gift' or my favorite, an 'under $20 edible or drinkable gift'.
No one really wants to do this and if someone suggests it, everyone will be relieved.
Which can be changed to a 'under $20 gift' or my favorite, an 'under $20 edible or drinkable gift'.
No one really wants to do this and if someone suggests it, everyone will be relieved.
4
Ah, the results of our market-driven, consumption-based economy- the tyranny of stuff! Perhaps this trend is the beginning of a fundamental change in how we live and define ourselves. But where will all the cast-offs go? The ultimate de-cluttering project: the environment.
10
I often think of the vast collective sigh of relief by other species (those that we don't destroy first) when the final human being is decluttered from this planet.
Imagine earth with no wars, no building booms, no oil drilling and transport, no man-made light washing out the night sky, no guns firing at defenseless animals for sport, no factory farms, no Roundup-laden fields of chemical-treated "crops," etc.? I do enjoy living and the hedonistic pleasures of being human but can't deny that we are the clutter on this otherwise lovely planet.
Imagine earth with no wars, no building booms, no oil drilling and transport, no man-made light washing out the night sky, no guns firing at defenseless animals for sport, no factory farms, no Roundup-laden fields of chemical-treated "crops," etc.? I do enjoy living and the hedonistic pleasures of being human but can't deny that we are the clutter on this otherwise lovely planet.
5
I think you're right about the electronic clutter. It can be stressful dealing with it too. I have physical clutter accumulated over my 50-year lifetime and also things I inherited when my mom and sister died. And then I think of my daughter. Do I want to leave her with all of the this? The electronic clutter? Digital photos on CDs, hardrives, computers. How to organize them in one central place? Do I print them or not? Articles that I've bookmarked because I don't have time to read them now. The too many free Kindle books I've downloaded. Electronic or physical -- it's all the same clutter to me.
3
I love de-cluttering and EBay has facilitated this newish passion. It is a relief to know that our excess stuff is not bound for our ocean dumps, at least not immediately. It is rewarding to know that my cast-off treasures that once meant something to me will be in the hands of someone else rather than unceremoniously swept aside by surviving children who may resent having to clean out mom's house once I'm gone. Is it the answer to the question of my search for peace? No. Does the cellphone and iPad and ubiquitous assault on the senses undermine the attempt to stop the relentless inner clutter that has displaced the outer clutter that I've rid myself of? No, although it creates a similar demand for attention, adding to the sense of time urgency. Bottom line: beautifully written article! And although it took time to read and time to respond, it's just plain more fun than buying a new shirt made in China by who knows what age person, a shirt that will surely end up at the bottom of the Pacific.
5
Speaking of clutter, in my infrequent forays into Facebook I sometimes encounter people who boast more than 1,000 friends - or at least people who are supposedly interested in the minutiae of their lives. The assumption is that, in turn, they invest some amount of time and thought to those 1,000 + people. Usually those are people in their 20s and 30s. It may be a status symbol of sorts, but it also seems to be a colossal waste of time. Those people tweet, disqus, insta-this and that. Now this is clutter.
21
To save my sanity, overnight I left my 2 bedroom house and everything inside it and flew out of the state with just a suitcase. I then moved into a studio apartment--400 sq ft. I have a flat screen, and internet. No mattress or bed frame to clean under and around and stealing precious space. Two chairs, one closet and some pots and pans. No microwave. A stove and refrigerator. Cupboards. Some forks, knives, and spoon. A coffee cup or two. It's hard to describe the relief of having a clutterless space that is simple to clean. It feels almost like wide open space!
Admittedly though, at times I think of the material stuff that I was forced to leave behind. But I know that if I really wanted all that stuff I can easily buy it all over again. It's material stuff that that has a value for all the wrong reasons. And those reasons are irrelevant in the pursuit of happiness. They are reasons that I am diligently trying to clear from my mind so it to can be free from clutter. Memories are all I need to carry in my brain.
Admittedly though, at times I think of the material stuff that I was forced to leave behind. But I know that if I really wanted all that stuff I can easily buy it all over again. It's material stuff that that has a value for all the wrong reasons. And those reasons are irrelevant in the pursuit of happiness. They are reasons that I am diligently trying to clear from my mind so it to can be free from clutter. Memories are all I need to carry in my brain.
2
I think I'd draw the line at no mattress. Do you sleep on the floor?
1
Um, no mattress? Where do you sleep?
1
Same way the Japanese do. I lay down memory foam mats. Nice and comfy.
4
"Less may be more, but it's still not enough." That says it all.
I have gotten rid of lots of stuff and my house is much easier to maintain and easier to live in, but when the few things that are out are put in their places, what is there left to do? I can read, but I could read when my house was cluttered. My life is still the same.
I have gotten rid of lots of stuff and my house is much easier to maintain and easier to live in, but when the few things that are out are put in their places, what is there left to do? I can read, but I could read when my house was cluttered. My life is still the same.
8
Try moving through an oncoming Nor'Easter, and another, a blizzard two days after than, and then record cold with another Nor'Easter on the way, all in the space of a week. It took a whole week of storms to get through it. You can throw money around like hotcakes at a fundraiser and you still cannot find anyone who can come to pack up your China, your Crystal, your Espresso Machine, fuzzy rice cooker, and 5 different kinds of coffee maker, a steamer and every make of kitchen utensil. While stressing about this conundrum, I made a decision based on the low quality of "moving specialists" I kept sending packing, albeit lighter a couple hundred dollars each time. I changed my tactic. The next crews (of folks able to get out of their houses and down the road following massive storms) were tasked with packing up and moving the fine things I had collected, three truck loads worth between storms. Having learned to let it all go rather than fret about moving 10 rooms of fine things to a new place: I sent them all to the donation centers a couple of miles away. 3 weeks out from that decision, I do not regret it too much. I had to also give up boxes of unused eco-friendly household cleaning products. Why did I need all that? I got rid of all of my cooking utensils. Place settings. World Series caps, vases and nic-nac's, teapots and cheap fripperies made overseas. Quite addicting judging from the end result. I feel great. I'll question all purchases: Will I regret this next time I move?
4
I can't help but wonder if there is a house vs. apartment disconnect going on in these comments. I've had to get rid of many items fairly recently and among those were easily 400 books. De-cluttering has meant stripping down to what I absolutely have to keep (work- and paperwork-related) and tossing many items that I enjoyed having around me. A lot of our stuff is about selfs we wanted to be, activities we could only rarely get to but still imagined ourselves someday doing again. I'm still sad about the novels.
9
One time I hired a decluttering consultant to get one room cleared out. It was expensive and basically involved cleaning together and putting things in giant ziploc bags to be sorted through later. After 4 hours of this, the consultant told me that most of her clients couldn't finish the sorting or keep it decluttered without hiring her to come back again. At that point I kicked myself for having hired her in the first place. Clearly this was just a band-aid. It wasn't getting to the root cause of the problem. She had no magic system, no clutter teflon coating, that would turn me into a person who doesn't create clutter.
So what is the root cause? I don't think it's just the amount of stuff that is available. I wonder if it has something to do with ADD/ADHD. Have we done something to the way our brains work, either biologically or through the way we use technology, that makes it hard to deal with a thousand little things? Or is it because we spend so little time present in daily life? I find that my brain wants to be entertained with information all the time instead of doing boring cleaning.
Someone should help us all by finding the root cause of the clutter problem.
So what is the root cause? I don't think it's just the amount of stuff that is available. I wonder if it has something to do with ADD/ADHD. Have we done something to the way our brains work, either biologically or through the way we use technology, that makes it hard to deal with a thousand little things? Or is it because we spend so little time present in daily life? I find that my brain wants to be entertained with information all the time instead of doing boring cleaning.
Someone should help us all by finding the root cause of the clutter problem.
5
the root cause of cluttering, as of so many things, is psychological/emotional. We tend to cling to things that have "meaning" for us. And, we often hope that we can pass on many of these things to our children, as a way of perpetuating our immortality. The reality is that most of these things that have meaning for us don't have nearly the same meaning for our kids, who see the stuff as junk.
8
Hi Hdb, someone has. The book is called "SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life: A Four-Step Guide to Getting Unstuck" by Julie Morgenstern. I found it very helpful in uncovering root causes of collecting/clutter.
1
I actually had a short article published in The Sunday Times LI section, I think in 1978, about the clutter in my room when I was growing up. Tell the truth, over a quarter century later, the major difference is that my gf cleans up instead of my mom. At least I've made progress.
4
I think of clutter not as an ideal or its opposite but how much is or is not impacting creative flow. Matisse always maintained a neat studio, Picasso a messy one. My studio and my office at work are always growing and contracting organically by my needs, the clutter being the combination of my own production and the introduction of stuff from the outside world that needs to be sorted into useful or not useful for my needs within a certain amount of time. I sort the piles when they interfere, but a completely austere environment is not productive for me either. I've lived in the forest and the plains, in the city and the country I would not cut down forests or destroy cities because they are too sensorily rich to be easily deciphered. Simplicity is illusory, it is all complex, full of dust motes and bacterial worlds. Do what works for you---we are all different.
195
There is a big gray area between 'clutter' and 'austere'.
38
I'd always sourced part of the material decluttering fad to the modern day predicament of digital information bombardment. With screens and devices constantly in our faces, as we multitask, stay abreast of social media, and close pop up windows, I am pretty sure my quest for decluttered order in my apartment is a sort of coping mechanism against all that NOISE!
But on a separate point, I am certain the minimalist style is a trend much encouraged by all the sleek and tiny devices and accessories that bundle functionality that used to come in much larger packages. Computers, stereos, tvs. So it is not so much less stuff as compact, tiny stuff. Are we really as minimalist as we think?
But on a separate point, I am certain the minimalist style is a trend much encouraged by all the sleek and tiny devices and accessories that bundle functionality that used to come in much larger packages. Computers, stereos, tvs. So it is not so much less stuff as compact, tiny stuff. Are we really as minimalist as we think?
13
Some of us feel oppressed by our possessions -- we prefer to have less and absolutely love getting rid of stuff. Others feel comforted by their stuff, as if it will insulate them from all that is scary in life. It often seems like this difference is ingrained. But I've seen many people have an epiphany when they let go of and get rid of possessions. A twentysomething couple I know gave up their apartment and spent several months traveling in Europe with a single bag each. Coming home, they wondered why they owned most of what they'd put in storage and have been getting rid of much of it.
Out of sight, out of mind applies: Most people aren't even aware of all that they own, and use or enjoy only a small portion of it. Even so, getting rid of things seems far, far harder than acquiring them -- perhaps because in our culture we experience constant reinforcement to buy more stuff, but absolutely no encouragement to abstain from materialism.
Out of sight, out of mind applies: Most people aren't even aware of all that they own, and use or enjoy only a small portion of it. Even so, getting rid of things seems far, far harder than acquiring them -- perhaps because in our culture we experience constant reinforcement to buy more stuff, but absolutely no encouragement to abstain from materialism.
41
If we ditch with the same superficiality with which we acquired, you are correct, the joy is illusory. The joy, and the mindfulness, will not appear as a result of the ditching unless they are also in the process.
20
Excellent observation that the clutter of our lives today is not just the material items. We are all acting like good soldiers, "just keep going", more connectivity, more overtime, more activities on the calendar, and all thinking that one day, we will get "caught up" and achieve peace. How delusional.
"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" - Steven Wright
"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" - Steven Wright
23
Perhaps for some of us decluttering is our last best chance to meet others' expectations, to finally this once satisfy the world's agonizingly demanding standards. Here's my one successful decluttering idea, which just barely works: I buy most of my clothes at the local thrift shop and when I've worn them to my limit I donate them back to the thrift shop. Someone else will wear them out differently just as was the case with myself and the previous owner. Thus, my clothes are like birds in flight, never completely mine, alighting and then gone.
36
Cool idea, although I have to admit I wouldn't do it.
2
Per your closing angst...
As they say:
It's not what you discarded - it's who you discarded...
As they say:
It's not what you discarded - it's who you discarded...
12
We live in a culture where your possessions define who you are. And in the absence of actual connection to other people or a vocation, confer meaning.
I fluctuate between finding my modest clutter stressful or a fact of modern life. I do think that decorating magazines, not unlike fashion magazines, depict idealized realities that are pretty hard to sustain. And when faced with any level of personal clutter, it's easy to feel woefully inadequate as a result.
Managing stuff requires a fair share of one's human capital- but the energy that maintaining a clutter free world also entails a lot of effort as well. I am still searching for some happy medium. Who knows if I'll ever find it!
http://curbappealinsleepyhollow.blogspot.com/
I fluctuate between finding my modest clutter stressful or a fact of modern life. I do think that decorating magazines, not unlike fashion magazines, depict idealized realities that are pretty hard to sustain. And when faced with any level of personal clutter, it's easy to feel woefully inadequate as a result.
Managing stuff requires a fair share of one's human capital- but the energy that maintaining a clutter free world also entails a lot of effort as well. I am still searching for some happy medium. Who knows if I'll ever find it!
http://curbappealinsleepyhollow.blogspot.com/
14
Far too many pets- dogs, mostly- in America have been relegated to "unused object" status and it is extremely disturbing. Single people owning dogs that are locked up alone for long, lonely hours each and every day. Twice daily walks that barely make it to the nearest intersection, tethered to owners completely absorbed in their phones- unaware of the nuisances, hazards, and abuse in their wake. It's not just irritating, it's evil.
110
I recommend 2 cats. Two cats that are devoted to each other. That's the ideal pet for too-busy people who want pets. The cats provide each other's play, companionship, and affection.
10
Why point out single people as "only" walking the dog twice a day. That seems to be what many people do regardless of marital status.
3
I know of more pet animals neglected by "families" than by single people, frankly. Especially poor sad, bewildered dogs that get "rehomed" after babies start coming along. The disposable creature.
7
Without knowing anything about this book, or even that the subject of de-cluttering had become "de rigueur," I began de-cluttering my apartment - a process I expect to take about three to four months. I did not have nearly as much as many others seem to have, but my clutter had prevented me from entertaining - or even having anyone over other than my closest friends (who I knew would not judge me for it) - for almost 20 years. It took having a goal (I am celebrating a 50th anniversary of sorts in July, and want to have an actual party) to get me past the combination of laziness, procrastination and "nostalgia" (i.e., the "sentimental" value of certain items) that had paralyzed me.
I am only about six weeks into the process - and thus far from the ultimate goal - and yet not only am I already feeling a sense of accomplishment and relief, I am actually enjoying the process. (Despite the copious amounts of dust that have all but destroyed my sinuses. LOL.)
Want to de-clutter? Simply find a "goal" that will motivate you to begin the process...and then watch as the process becomes a joyful "end in itself," even before you reach the goal.
I am only about six weeks into the process - and thus far from the ultimate goal - and yet not only am I already feeling a sense of accomplishment and relief, I am actually enjoying the process. (Despite the copious amounts of dust that have all but destroyed my sinuses. LOL.)
Want to de-clutter? Simply find a "goal" that will motivate you to begin the process...and then watch as the process becomes a joyful "end in itself," even before you reach the goal.
62
I don't know if it's so much joy, but relief or release.
I moved for the second time in two years, and about the 10th time in my adult life, last year. Each move, I've tried to purge as much stuff as possible. The only regret I have is a small box of old photos I accidentally lost in a move, but nothing I intentionally discarded.
Some people I know clutch their pearls over the mere thought of culling their book collection. But pack those boxes enough times, and you realize that Kindles, Nooks and public libraries are much better options sometimes.
There is also another reason behind the decluttering urge. Many adults from their 40s on up have had to deal with all their parents' accumulated stuff, either after their deaths or in helping them downsize to a smaller home or assisted living-type place. Not wanting that for yourself or your own kids is a big incentive to PURGE ALL THE THINGS! (cribbed from Hyperbole and a Half)
There was a great quote from that '80s show "thirtysomething" -- "Some things are old and have value, and some things are just old." Which is which is up to you.
I moved for the second time in two years, and about the 10th time in my adult life, last year. Each move, I've tried to purge as much stuff as possible. The only regret I have is a small box of old photos I accidentally lost in a move, but nothing I intentionally discarded.
Some people I know clutch their pearls over the mere thought of culling their book collection. But pack those boxes enough times, and you realize that Kindles, Nooks and public libraries are much better options sometimes.
There is also another reason behind the decluttering urge. Many adults from their 40s on up have had to deal with all their parents' accumulated stuff, either after their deaths or in helping them downsize to a smaller home or assisted living-type place. Not wanting that for yourself or your own kids is a big incentive to PURGE ALL THE THINGS! (cribbed from Hyperbole and a Half)
There was a great quote from that '80s show "thirtysomething" -- "Some things are old and have value, and some things are just old." Which is which is up to you.
68
I used to keep books, just because I liked the look of lots of books on lots of shelves. But after too many moves, and too many dreary days spent dusting the shelves (good blizzard activity though) I have gotten rid of most. A book should be one I cherish, refer to again, reread, or urge others to read if I'm going to keep it.
6
A few years ago we downsized from a small house with a large (full of stuff) two-story garage to a 2 bedroom apt downtown. A year later I asked spouse (the packratty one of us), "Do you miss the stuff we got rid of?" Reply: "I don't even remember what it was"
10
I love my books too much to get rid of them. I'm one of those people who can't even lend a book to someone, for fear of never seeing it again (which in the past happened all too often). Books stay. Everything else can go.
3
Is this anti-clutter movement really 'mindfulness' or an attempt to put a trendy, if not exactly happy, face on a fact of life for those engaged in high-pressure careers in high-priced cities: a lack of not only places to put your stuff, but even time to enjoy it? After all, those of us who are still trying to live out the 'New York, New York' fantasy (the song, that is) are, for the most part, Alices being admonished by the Red Queen: "Hurry! It takes all the running you can do to stay in the same place!"
42
Unfortunately, after the uncluttering, little by little stuff can find its way back into the home (in the form of rewards for having reduced the clutter)
14
Endless Facebook posts. Following the twitters of someone you don't really know who pays someone else to write and post the tweets for him. Afraid to miss a phone call or text for fear that your friends -- or the entire world -- might somehow leave you behind.
This is our generation's real clutter. And if we're not careful, the clutter of the future.
This is our generation's real clutter. And if we're not careful, the clutter of the future.
274
At least that's clutter I can abstain from. Usually.
I for one am happy that I'm no longer considered strange for wanting to offload what's no longer useful, or never was useful.
I for one am happy that I'm no longer considered strange for wanting to offload what's no longer useful, or never was useful.
Wow, talk about first-world problems. I'm sure lots of companies love this trend, because the less stuff you have, the more services you have to hire. Don't have an iron? Guess you'll have to get that shirt dry-cleaned. Let's call de-cluttering what it is: a bourgeoisie affectation that atrophies important self-maintaining skills.
47
An iron that is used is not clutter. Clothes in the closet that is unworn--that's the clutter.
14
Iron? What's an iron? Oh, wait, I vaguely remember gliding something across sheets and pillowcases as a kid until my mother discovered permaprest fabric.
2
Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without!
Thankfully, I'll never know how good it might feel to declutter.
I do know how good it feels never to have accumulated so much unnecessary stuff in the first place.
It's really depressing that humans keep purchasing useless trinkets in an ever escalating but unattainable pursuit of happiness, only to fill our landfills and oceans with plastic; buy, dispose, repeat.
Reduce, reuse, recycle - but most importantly, reduce!
Thankfully, I'll never know how good it might feel to declutter.
I do know how good it feels never to have accumulated so much unnecessary stuff in the first place.
It's really depressing that humans keep purchasing useless trinkets in an ever escalating but unattainable pursuit of happiness, only to fill our landfills and oceans with plastic; buy, dispose, repeat.
Reduce, reuse, recycle - but most importantly, reduce!
112
I would say most important is Refuse. Don't buy it or bring it into your home in the first place.
6
I remember being five years old.. waking up, looking around my room and thinking " I have GOT to organize this mess!".. That was over fifty years ago and....
.....One thing that does seem to work is sorting like items with like items. It's very easy and requires not deep thought or parting with anything. Books with books, letters with letters, 1950's casserole cookbooks with 1950's casserole cookbooks...
Oh.. never mind.
.....One thing that does seem to work is sorting like items with like items. It's very easy and requires not deep thought or parting with anything. Books with books, letters with letters, 1950's casserole cookbooks with 1950's casserole cookbooks...
Oh.. never mind.
114
What is depressing about a lot of blogs, as well written and poignant they might be, that they usually arrive at the really interesting question only at the end.
'Less may be more, but it's still not enough'.
Why does the estimable author not start with this premise and write about what might be enough or at least, in which direction to go to answer that question.
'Less may be more, but it's still not enough'.
Why does the estimable author not start with this premise and write about what might be enough or at least, in which direction to go to answer that question.
81
Whatever happened to the first rule of journalism: "Don't bury the lead."
2
best comment here. "We all can relate to the notion of clutter" is just about everything the article is aiming to say, which is not much.
What's behind this mass urge to purge? A deeper analysis would be in order.
36
Unlike New Yorkers we in modest towns have attics and basements where things can be deposited for future consideration. As a frugal person now retired I do not need to be decked out in the latest fashion. I can sift through things and in a sense shop in my own storage units. I can re-purpose pieces and, yes, also put things in bags and give them away. Some in couple-dom notice they are more assiduous in getting rid of their partner's stuff. This is happening at the moment with my husband's arcane collection of APBA baseball cards which I have found fetch some dollar rewards on ebay.
22
Wait until he finds out!
4
Unlike people in Pennsylvania, many of us here in Virginia live in apartments or trailers or rooms in assisted living or even houses with no attics and only a crawl space at best. We had no idea that all living arrangements in Pennsylvania came equipped with attics and basements.
3
Clutter, it is all in the eye of the beholder. Me, I call it 'my mess', something to take care of in my retirement when I will hire others to run an endless garage sale. For now, I choose to not be burdened by de-cluttering fever. I know that if I took the cure, getting rid of 'my mess', I would fall victim to starting another mess. Better the mess you have, rather then the mess to come. Keeps things simple.
53
"when I will hire others to run an endless garage sale"
Will that actually happen though or is that another way of saying "maybe tomorrow"
Will that actually happen though or is that another way of saying "maybe tomorrow"
3
Clutter has its uses. Take the recent bankruptcy of Radio Shack, for example. Like millions of other Americans, I have hundreds, nay thousands, of electrical parts of varying types and descriptions scattered all around the house, some of them apparently dating back close to the time of Edison. There is no electrical need these wires, batteries, cables, transistors, coils, capacitators, magnets and other odds and ends cannot fulfill. Who needs Radio Shack, when they already are Radio Shack? All I lack is a manual to tell me what my parts are and what they do.
131
After inheriting the tool chests, plastic-drawered hardware organizers, power tools and painting supplies from four households, my basement rivals Home Depot. No matter how obscure the size or shape of nut, bolt, nail, tack, washer, picture hanger, cup hook, upholstery brad or other fastener, I can supply it in an instant. And some of those heavy-cabled rusty old power tools -- each in their upright metal case, ID'd with a Braille-like plastic Dymo label, are probably ready for the nearest history museum.
Lots of "might come in handy someday" fodder down there and thus very difficult to part with.
Lots of "might come in handy someday" fodder down there and thus very difficult to part with.
67
And I have been in there buying more.
2
Oh yes! When I retired and moved to Arizona I packed up wires, cables, CPUs, batteries, speakers (dating back to the 60s) in boxes and boxes and boxes. Then Goodwill showed up at my door and hauled it all off. Ooooh. What heaven!
3
I agree completely with Druckerman's final statement. About two years ago, I made my move from NYC to living as an expat in Europe. It was a glorious opportunity to compact everything I owned into two very large suitcases, thus having to get rid of most of my material belongings. I temporarily enjoyed a quiet mind ... until the running to-do list in my head resumed. Despite fairly empty closets, my mind filled quickly with nagging pressures: re-start exercise routine, learn new language, find new friends, and the list went on and on. What really needs de-cluttering in this day and age? Well, starting with our closets might help, but it's the manic 21st century mind that truly needs the zen infusion.
439
That pressure is self-inflicted. Learning a new language, making new friends in a new place can be joyful and satisfying challenges/new additions to a life, and not strictly time-sensitive to-dos.
Hope you EMBRACE/ENJOY your new situation!
Hope you EMBRACE/ENJOY your new situation!
4
I agree completely! We human beans have always needed ways to fill our natural emptiness, but our "age of electronics" has introduced a new kind of emptiness. The old kind gave us time to watch the birds, take a nap, deadhead flowers in the garden, people-watch almost anywhere. With the advent of smartphones, laptops, Facebook and Twitter, many of us have become unable to focus on our natural rhythms. I can no longer walk down the street and make eye contact with anyone, because 95% of people are either texting, talking on the phone or reading Facebook--or taking pictures with their cell cameras. In a plaza yesterday, I watched a group of people taking selfies. Our completely digital world is kinda scary!
8
So true. As long as there is a laptop or tablet nearby, there is the risk of "cluttering" one's mind - and having time sucked away. A vital step in handling any kind of clutter is deciding what possessions are worth the time to dust, clean, and store because life is indeed too short to miss out on what brings us joy. So I'll gladly keep - and maintain and treasure- the vintage portrait of my mother but ditch the extra wine glasses and dishes I'll never use.
4
I inherited my in-laws possessions and most of my brothers in the last eight years. Needless to say my basement is full of “clutter,” mostly in the form of labeled boxes on shelves. In the course of assembling all this “stuff” lots of things were discarded (old textbooks, decades of “National Geographic’s”) or given away to charity and the local library. Many of the things that were saved have little value--letters, old books with inscriptions on the fly leaf, remnants of past interests (who knew my genteel mother in law once was outfitted with knapsack and canteen for a hike in the great outdoors!). Sometimes opening a copy of a work by Dickens brings a smile to my face and a
fond memory as I read the comments penciled in the margins, other times I handle an object that I know my brother cherished. Most of the time things wait for that mythical rainy day when I sort through my cache of treasured artifacts. Archaeologists search through the discarded clutter of the past looking for clues on ordinary lives that were lived where people didn't record the details of their daily existence. I don’t feel my life to be full of clutter but rather full of lives once lived and now ready to be rediscovered in the details that get missed as we rush through each day. I’m the curator of these past memories and deeds and my only worry is that someone will pick up where I leave off when my curator-ship ends.
fond memory as I read the comments penciled in the margins, other times I handle an object that I know my brother cherished. Most of the time things wait for that mythical rainy day when I sort through my cache of treasured artifacts. Archaeologists search through the discarded clutter of the past looking for clues on ordinary lives that were lived where people didn't record the details of their daily existence. I don’t feel my life to be full of clutter but rather full of lives once lived and now ready to be rediscovered in the details that get missed as we rush through each day. I’m the curator of these past memories and deeds and my only worry is that someone will pick up where I leave off when my curator-ship ends.
58
I solve the clutter problem with the simple motto "Procrastinate NOW!"
43
"Less may be more, but it’s still not enough."
Just about my favorite bon mot of the year. Thank you!
Just about my favorite bon mot of the year. Thank you!
11
i'm more an animist with this topic – if you respect the object, keep it. if not, throw or give it away. the objects in your life tell a story, so ask yourself, is it at least an interesting narrative? i started an instagram blog on this top called thing love actually, @thinglove there.
8
Why is it that everything is so important that it is now "curated"...?
46
"Curated" is a word that tries to elevate acquisition into an art form. It's not an art form. All the tastefulness and trendiness in the world will not disguise pitiful waste and vacancy.
6
Although electronic detritus isn't quite comparable to 'stuff', it IS a time burden.
There's a reason that the DELETE key on my laptop has been worn to an unreadable status. If you don't do facebook, you don't have that time waster to worry about...
But then there are our two rented storage sheds; hers and mine. Unfortunately, mine is 2/3 filled with plastic storage tubs of stuff we've carried through two moves, unopened.
Has anyone come up with a good way to scan and archive family photos electronically? We've got boxes of pics that would do better stored on a RAID drive. Far too many to use a multi-function flatbed scanner.
There's a reason that the DELETE key on my laptop has been worn to an unreadable status. If you don't do facebook, you don't have that time waster to worry about...
But then there are our two rented storage sheds; hers and mine. Unfortunately, mine is 2/3 filled with plastic storage tubs of stuff we've carried through two moves, unopened.
Has anyone come up with a good way to scan and archive family photos electronically? We've got boxes of pics that would do better stored on a RAID drive. Far too many to use a multi-function flatbed scanner.
8
'...Has anyone come up with a good way to scan and archive family photos electronically?...'
Online services do this very cheaply but, sad to say, it is still impossible to throw out your children's baby pictures.
Online services do this very cheaply but, sad to say, it is still impossible to throw out your children's baby pictures.
Clutter is perhaps the best open held secret of all times. Once we are in possession of certain things, mostly disposable, it is mighty difficult to get rid of...as we never know when we might need them. The famous saying that some people 'are', while most just 'have' (not you or me, of course) is too simplistic to explain our clutter, within ourselves (poor brain) and without. For now, we have been renting a couple of 'rentals' to de-clutter our place, at a cost that may, as our income is cut, become prohibitive, at which time the hope is that our garbage will become somebody's treasure. If all fails, there is always a poor soul grateful to take it, charity donations becoming more discriminating (one must wash the clothing before it is accepted, the old car must be in running condition, some do not accept toys without the batteries). If that fails, you could try selling your house and move into a small apartment that does not have much storage. What a headache, the 'cluster' type.
43
When you add up the cost of the rental, you find out quite quickly how improbable it is that selling your junk in the future will come even close to the rent money you spent holding on to it, not to mention the time and trouble of maintaining it as you add to the crammed storage unit or try to fish something out of the back, or just get rid of the stuff that no longer has any use as time and progress has made it unusable.
3
One person's clutter is another person's memories. I get rid of junk but I can't imagine ditching or not buying art if it speaks to me. The family heirlooms in my house aren't just rugs and furniture, they are family history that spans time and continents. Plus I am a quiltmaker, an innately clutter filled activity. I will never be a modern aesthete.
53
Memories are not things, they live in your mind and heart, just as people who have died live on there too.
Well, yes, memories are ephemeral or lasting, accurate or flawed. But I wish I had a "thing" that my late sister valued not just old photos. You can have your idea of ideal living and I can have mine because there is no right path.
2
I disagree with the author's disbelief that "beneath all these distractions, we’ll discover our shining, authentic selves, or even achieve a state of mindfulness” while agreeing that simply decluttering not will achieve that state.
In fact, that quiet gap is always there underneath it all, quietly waiting for your return, but it's your thoughts and storylines that you need to - not declutter - but rather accept without buying into their false reality and shouldism. It's the cluttering thoughts of woulda, shoulda, coulda's that distracts us from that quiet gap of stillness and self. The outward things are just a ramification of the mind muscling and asserting itself over the quiet stillness in each of us.
In fact, that quiet gap is always there underneath it all, quietly waiting for your return, but it's your thoughts and storylines that you need to - not declutter - but rather accept without buying into their false reality and shouldism. It's the cluttering thoughts of woulda, shoulda, coulda's that distracts us from that quiet gap of stillness and self. The outward things are just a ramification of the mind muscling and asserting itself over the quiet stillness in each of us.
122
I like the story of a Buddhist monk who goes to the apple store because his computer would not run. The young technician did manage to turn the computer on. But what he noticed on the desktop was an overflowing trash bin. He asked the monk when did you empty your trash bun last and he replied it had been a while. The technician then emptied the trash for him by deleting the files in it and woah, the computer responded like a purring kitty. It was running smoothly again, high speed and all. The monk relates this story to the clutter and trash in our heads and minds. Unless we make it a practice to routinely get rid of the things we have dumped within, we cannot operate smoothly. Our shining self cannot emerge past the clutter that bogs us down with its non essential chatter.
7
Yes. Decluttering does indeed bring joy. No lots of e mails or Facebook posts to wade through is not equivalent to clutter. That's silly and pretentious and a sure sign you really either have never had an issue with clutter or that you still have one so large you'd like to pretend you don't.
After spending a great deal of time in the clutter filled home of my outwardly appearing neat and together cousin at the time of her death and realizing how chaotic such living really was when one viewed it from the outside I vowed to change. The amount of extra time one has when ones homeis not filled with stuff one does not need is amazing. It's not about getting rid of everything or being a minimalist it's about having the stuff you do need and that brings you pleasure easy to see and find.
For those who want a more practical more decidedly low brow method for de cluttering I recommend the blog A Slob Comes Clean. I have virtually nothing in common with the small town religious crock pot cooking woman who writes it but her methods are so good and practical and realistic and she's so genuinely warm and funny that anyone who wants to de clutter but can't imagine the fastidiousness of Ms Kondo should give her a try.
After spending a great deal of time in the clutter filled home of my outwardly appearing neat and together cousin at the time of her death and realizing how chaotic such living really was when one viewed it from the outside I vowed to change. The amount of extra time one has when ones homeis not filled with stuff one does not need is amazing. It's not about getting rid of everything or being a minimalist it's about having the stuff you do need and that brings you pleasure easy to see and find.
For those who want a more practical more decidedly low brow method for de cluttering I recommend the blog A Slob Comes Clean. I have virtually nothing in common with the small town religious crock pot cooking woman who writes it but her methods are so good and practical and realistic and she's so genuinely warm and funny that anyone who wants to de clutter but can't imagine the fastidiousness of Ms Kondo should give her a try.
45
But the question is, did your cousin feel that her life was chaotic? It's unfortunate that you have been left with what is for you a mess to take care of, but I wonder if it really bothered your cousin or if she was perfectly happy with things as they were.
2
For a long time I've been down-sizing so that I can right-size my life. I have followed my cousin's mantra: "Work hard to simplify your life." So I consume less, recycle everything possible, and often re-use others' cast offs. As I have helped a lot of people shed the entire contents of their homes and lives, I know simplifying one's life has many rewards. Giving away things while your alive can benefit those in need and bring loved ones joy; so why not learn to lightly on the planet?
140
Ann....Sounds rather strange. You have helped people shed the 'entire' contents of their homes and entire contents of their lives? A lot of people? Be concrete---how many people, what's left in their homes and lives. Are they in institutions then? Just curious. Thanks.
15
>re-use others' cast offs.
It can be depressing/bewildering to think about what is thrown away, by individuals and corporations. Here's a crazy story about dumpster diving: http://www.wired.com/2015/02/high-end-dumpster-diving-matt-malone/
I'm in my 40s. I have never bought a new car (nor owned one since college), a single piece of new furniture, a refrigerator or washing machine or microwave. I have bought 1 new TV, 2 cell phones and 3 computers in my life.
It is amazingly easy to live perfectly comfortably/simply on second hand goods, whether from a thrift shop or discarded by others.
It can be depressing/bewildering to think about what is thrown away, by individuals and corporations. Here's a crazy story about dumpster diving: http://www.wired.com/2015/02/high-end-dumpster-diving-matt-malone/
I'm in my 40s. I have never bought a new car (nor owned one since college), a single piece of new furniture, a refrigerator or washing machine or microwave. I have bought 1 new TV, 2 cell phones and 3 computers in my life.
It is amazingly easy to live perfectly comfortably/simply on second hand goods, whether from a thrift shop or discarded by others.
8
I was glad to see Karen Kingston's name mentioned here. Every since I read her book in the early 90s (and actually did what she said), I have remembered her advice on how to bypass all the back and forth in my head about whether I would use or repair or otherwise want or "need" this or that in some imagined future. That chatter when clutter-clearing is ALSO burdensome clutter.
To paraphrase, her advice was to note in your gut/heart if an object rings you or up or brings you down when you look at it or think about it. If it the latter, it is clutter, and can be gotten rid of; if the later, it probably has some good function in your life." The beauty part is you know RIGHT AWAY which one it is, and can move through the garbage bags. For example, I once saved every old love letter I had ever gotten from every (now failed) relationship. Realizing it made me sad and actually brought me down (rather than warm and mushy) when I thought about them prompted me to get rid of them, and I have never missed them for even a second.
To paraphrase, her advice was to note in your gut/heart if an object rings you or up or brings you down when you look at it or think about it. If it the latter, it is clutter, and can be gotten rid of; if the later, it probably has some good function in your life." The beauty part is you know RIGHT AWAY which one it is, and can move through the garbage bags. For example, I once saved every old love letter I had ever gotten from every (now failed) relationship. Realizing it made me sad and actually brought me down (rather than warm and mushy) when I thought about them prompted me to get rid of them, and I have never missed them for even a second.
1