Isn't this in "The Dummie Guide to Narcicissm" chapter 3 - Great Locations for Taking Selfies
4
We recently built a new addition to our home and added a third bath. It has beautiful porcelain tile floors and other decorative tile around the new soaker tub. I think I'm going to recruit neighbors and friends and make a new hit video! Imagine a bunch of seniors in their 70s and 80s! Wow! We'll start with a great bubble bath scene! Maybe our grandkids will help us navigate this new world! Can't wait to get started! The clock is ticking! TikTok!
12
There ought to be a moratorium on writers/journalists using the collective 'WE" as in the title of this piece.
You have no way of knowing what the overwhelming majority of people actually do--in their bathrooms, or anywhere else.
1
and you wonder why we have Trump in office..
6
"We’re All in the Bathroom Filming Ourselves"
Actually, we're not. I get frustrated when the Times, apparently in an effort to be perceived as hip, runs superficial pieces like this. This tendency is bleeding into other sections.
Examples:
-- The Editorial Board reality show endorsement process which didn't result in a decision for one candidate.
-- The section "Work Friend," which is too busy being snarky to offer useful advice.
-- The constant, gratuitous animations and gifs like the one illustrating this article that make me feel as if I'm going crazy. Are we in a post-literate phase already? It sure feels like it.
11
The generation divide in these comments is so wide, there is a 10 second sound delay. It's almost comical. I'm Gen X and I'm no stranger to bathroom videos. I believe the appeal for the bathroom backdrop is that it is... so real. It's relate-able. I think people have tired of the perfect Instagram backdrop of yoga poses on sunset-lit beaches, of seeing perfect outfits lounging at five star hotel pools, etc. The bathroom videos show real people, in their real clothing, blemishes and bed head and all. It's exactly low-key. I get to see my favorite models who look almost goofy without makeup. The social media landscape has gone mediocre with curated perfection (LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, etc.) and shooting in the bathroom is kind of a reflex to all that baloney.
3
I think it's great that there are these new platforms where young people can vent their creative energies. But I have to confess, I'm 65 years old and I don't get it.
2
If you can film in the bathroom then you can go make a movie on your phone with your friends. Or go volunteer in a political campaign. Or a soup kitchen. Is the brave new world going to be created by people who think watching someone floss is a step forward in human progress?
31
Not in locker rooms.
American narcissism at it's finest.... ladies and gentlemen, this is why we can't have nice things.....
10
Evidence of NYTimes' decent into pop culture morass: An article stating that "We're All..." doing dumb stuff.
No we're Not. What UP, NYT? We expect rational reporting from you. Not day-sensation pretense that a relatively small, cancerous cell of society is setting the trend for the rest of us.
16
I apparently am missing out on one of the key components to a full life. Sorry - too late to start now.
11
Just remember boys and girls, what you post on the Internet remains there forever...regardless of the assurances by the service provider. What may "disappear" is likely kept as a screenshot by a follower of your group, thus providing that loophole for the vendor. Finally, facial recognition is big business for these companies and it will provide them with troves of opportunities for future use.
7
I guess these people don’t mind their future including college admissions, scholarship selection and job opportunities being impacted by these posts. And yes selection committees etc. do look at social media.
8
Just imagine a company requiring you to present a photo ID or to have your photo taken before an interview...and the during the interview, they will process that photo through facial recognition software to pull up all of your drunken college party photos. Just imagine.
5
I was really hoping this was going to examine why we are using private places to generate public content and what that says about how we view ourselves online vs irl.
7
We are in Gen K. (K for Kardashian). The dumbing down of America can’t get too much lower at this point. Can it?
27
@sam Here's a potential future NYT headline: Trump Re-Elected.
It can.
5
Point to ponder,
TikTok is the delivery agent for sexually explicit content, cyberbullying, depicting adolescent pregnancies and deepfakes. Subscribers are in the billions!
6
So - yeah - that collective "we" might be a tad over-stated...
especially for folks who say 'tad'
12
So now we're living not in a cancel culture, but in an "elimination" culture. Wow. Great subject, great contribution to the human race.
5
Mental note: install hideous/embarrassing wall paper in my kids’ bathroom.
22
Different day, same inescapable postmodernism that the Talking Heads identified in the late 1970s. We want to escape the mass culture with differentiation, and in doing so, become the media. For better or (mostly) worse. Indeed, like Dave Byrne’s characters, it’s the desire to “[Find] a Job” that gets many Gen Z’ers into the influencering game in the first place.
Judy's in the [bathroom], inventing situations.
Bob is on the street today, scouting up locations.
They've enlisted all their family.
They've enlisted all their friends.
It helped saved their relationship,
And made it work again
Their show gets real high ratings, they think they have a hit.
There might even be a spin off, but they're not sure 'bout that.
If they ever watch T.V. again, it'd be too soon for them.
Bob never yells about the picture now, he's having too much fun.
4
Hi everyone,
I’d just like any TikTok users who might be interested to know that the whole ‘film yourself over months or weeks in the bathroom’ is actually a parody of trans people filming their transition periods as they change. The trend was initially a form of mocking these people, and as such I think we should be cognisant of the possibility that this trend might be in poor taste.
Obviously it has evolved so far as a trend, and been used by so many who are unaware of its origins, one might argue it no longer carries the same connotations. Nevertheless, for those who are hurt by this mockery, intentional or not, perhaps we should consider focusing on other bathroom-mirror-related TikTok activities.
This piece was really great by the way. I am always so amazed by NYT writers’ abilities to explore the potential reasons behind why trends are successful. It speaks to my interest in what makes seemingly meaningless content like TikTok dances so popular and watch-able.
8
Now that modern industrial society has eliminated the need for people to spend most of their time surviving - we are left with bathroom videos.
7
@Thomas "Post-industrial" We don't make anything anymore except entertainment.
2
Short-Attention Span Theater, redux.
7
No thanks. I'm glad I'm not part of this generation and can't wait for it to be all grown up. Please don't have kids until you can rip yourself away from the phone and pay attention to them.
8
@D.
Or not walk into people on the street whilst checking for likes.
5
My 60-year-old knee jerk reaction to selfie culture is to roll my eyes and write off the participants as rampant narcissists. Then I think about all the under-40 friends and family members who partake and I realize they are smart, interesting, engaged people. So I guess I have to accept that it is me that has crossed over into "get off my lawn" land. I could be sad about it, but it's kind of amusing, so I'll just be thankful for these peeks into the "new normal".
10
And also, the acoustics are best in the bathroom - sometimes I jump in there to do some of my warm up vocalizing before I settle down to practice!! :-)
As a 40-something (closer to 50 than 40), I’m too old for Tik-tok (did I spell that right?) but if kids want to have fun then who are we to complain - at least they’re giving themselves the best acoustics in the house!
4
I think people are going crazy. Literally. Out of their minds. Where is this going to stop??
12
So many of these comments warrant an "OK Boomer."
10
A lot of us do not even have social media. I realize that since the Times is run by people who do have social media, we on the other side seem like an irrelevant and invisible subgroup.
Social media has made us invisible to you, and that's fine, but there are more of us than you think. We are online, and we access content via browsers. We communicate with email, and we make phone calls.
But we aren't a small group, and we are going to be around for some time more. And all of us refuse to participate in the Kardashianizing of society. And here's the other deal: by the time we are gone, Gen Z (those of Gen Z that make it into late adulthood without killing themselves) will end up outlawing it anyway because they will have realized what it has done to them.
So enjoy doing ducklips on the toilet while you can, because this won't last.
13
We're all writing headlines about things that only our circle of friends are doing.
8
Although I’m not on any social media, I did ask my wonderful cat “Moon” if she regretted that we are unable to post a TikTok of her racing dementedly round and round the bathtub chasing a laser point. She said “no,” and that my husband and I are enough of an audience for her.
12
No we're not all in the bathroom filming ourselves. Somehow, I resist the urge every day!
6
I just developed a new app! It's called E-COLI. It's so popular it's on every bathroom user's phone!
15
@Frank Don't forget E-COLI's companion app: Drip-Drop.
And they both funnel all of your personal information straight to China.
4
Tik tok is all over the world and is not just for teens, I have seen all ages from all countries and most of them are fun to watch, to those that tik tok keep it up your creativity is amazing
2
"We" are not "all" under 30 with nothing else to do.
7
I feel so very, very old.
6
When do they read a book?
8
Some teenagers crusade against climate change, others take selfies in the bathroom.
12
"We’re All in the Bathroom Filming Ourselves."
No. we're not.
16
Gross! What goes on behind that door should stay there.
2
i get it. you can't film climate change from a bathroom.
clever.
4
Wow, I hope you're not all self absorbed egomaniacs deluded by the literally fake world of apps and likes. For those that are, I feel so sorry for you.
6
No, we are not!
4
Um, okay. Not me, but I guess whatever floats your boat...
5
No we are not.
3
Put down your phones and pick up a book, or better yet, a newspaper.
7
one of the most ridiculous, self-degrading social media phenomenons EVER: bathroom selfies ....that said, how do I tell the few people I know who still do it, some DAILY (??!?!?!) that it is a mental disorder, and that it's not cool ...??
4
48 year old woman: yes i take bathroom selfies,, let's be honest here! i see the other comments,, if you are not taking them you are lame or you are lying. what's wrong with it?
1
@cait farrell 60+ yr old man: no I've never taken a bathroom selfie and I cannot even imagine a reason for doing so. That's 100% honesty, and don't call me lame. As to your question, I don't really know "what's wrong with it" because I'm not a doctor. Maybe you should ask one.
8
@cait farrell nope, nopeity, nope. 57 year old here, lame? really ? constant self love validation in a room which is really for bodily functions. sheesh, no one needs to take a daily selfie in the bathroom its gross, selfish, kinda disgusting. many, many, many people use them for what they were designed for. and wash your hands before and after us
3
I'm a single woman in my mid-30's in NYC. Whenever I see an online dating profile with mirror or bathroom selfies (whether it's shirt on or off), it's a hard pass for me. The potential narcissism issues are too much to take on.
15
I have three grandchildren, all boys under 5. As soon as they were able to recognize themselves in pictures, they have been fascinated with the phenomenon. Narcissism is a severe personality disorder, being fascinated with ourselves is normal. In fact, people who are not have some serious esteem issues. Of course, as we grow older most of us know ourselves well enough to not always be checking in.
7
This is so cringe-worthy.
41
@Mark F I so agree. I've seen pictures on dating sites that were taken in public bathrooms and I'm talking about middle-aged men doing it. Automatic reject for me.
8
Good grief, what narcissistic absurdity.
26
“I’ll be in the bathroom making tiktoks”
12
@Gross
awesome response
i got it...
2
@Gross “I’ll be in the bathroom making tiktoks” Words destined to go down in history.
4
Umm, no. We are ALL definitely NOT filming ourselves...anywhere, especially not in the bathroom.
Nor are we tweeting in our bathrobes .
Some of us are actually following the impeachment trial.
59
@Babs some of us can do both
Jitterbug = "we're doomed!"
Elvis = "we're doomed!"
Hippies = "we're doomed!"
Walkman = "we're doomed!"
Video Games = "we're doomed!"
Internet = "we're doomed!"
Smart Phones = "we're doomed!"
Get over it, people. You were all 15 once, you all did questionable, self-expressing things older people mocked and didn't understand. Sure, cycles move faster now. But there will always be lawns protected and lawns trampled.
39
But in previous generations, teens and tweens could not send something out into the ether from their bedrooms that could materially damage their futures.
42
@AKW
Please don't tell me what to get over. I'm quite capable of knowing and adhering to my own values. When you say "get over it" what you are really saying is "think like me." Pretty much reflects the tawdriness described in this article.
27
@Babs Good point, Babs. But by the time all these kids are older, AI and robots will have replaced the need for intellect and labor. So there won't really be any material futures to ruin.... just everyone Hologramming from their underground pods.
9
I didn't "get" the craze of TiKTok until I installed the app myself.
All these commenters giving the kids a hard time for doing something that's interesting and relevant to their generation makes me wanna say "Ok Boomer."
Who CARES if they ARE filming in the bathroom. It's fun! It's creative! It's their life! 99.9% of the TikToks I come across are funnier than any stand-ups and/or comedy films.
These kids are doing a great job. I cannot wrap my head around their creativity at all.
So to everyone that don't "get it" or think "this generation's brains are collectively rotting" think about what your elders said about YOU and YOUR weird interests. It's a constant cycle of belittling the kids. Stop that. If they are having fun and not hurting themselves or others, why not let them continue to have fun and be CREATIVE.
52
@JZ
OK Boomer? Here's reality.
We formed the civil rights movement, the environmental movement, the womens rights movement, the anti-war and anti-nuclear movements. We were behind the explosion of the tech revolution - think Jeff Bezos, Steve Jobs, Paul Allen, Bill Gates. We worked hard on the revitalization of central cities all across America - those places that are now "awesome." The list goes on. Decades of actual work.
So, you would prefer that those things didn't happen? Or they're illegitimate because we did them? OK, so go back in time, undo all that we did, and start from there. What, you don't want to do that? Too hard? Sounds selfish to me. Far easier to take pictures of yourselves. Now there's a contribution.
26
@JZ I am not a boomer (on the cusp) but would be proud to be one, if this is what the younger generations are doing.
12
@JZ I'm quite often the first to speak up on behalf of younger generations, because I do believe that they often get a bad rap. In this case, I think it's a red herring: Even if you narrow the scope of "we're all" in the headline to just the Millenials and Gen Z, I still don't think it holds true. It's someone's imagination that this is a common thing. Most people, young or old, don't regularly, if ever, film themselves in the bathroom. So, I think one can mock this article without risking slandering a whole generation. It's the headline writer who did that.
8
I turned 40 last November. The age-ining was subtle; at first, I couldn’t identify half of the people in US Weekly. Then, I couldn’t identify half of the words my students were shouting. Now, social media. I don’t begrudge young people (under 30), with their Tik Toks and Knock-knocks. I am bemused, though, with the seemingly daily updates on what a loud minority of teenagers are taking part in, these ephemeral “experiences”that have lessened their critical thinking skills and have rendered 5-page essays obsolete.
52
@Jared Wood If you turned 40, then you were part of the MTV generation or actually came a bit later. In any event, MTV's choppy edited videos I think gave rise to the short attention spans we see now. I mean look at 70s music with their 30 minute song and so on and by the time 80s came around, it was all 3 minute hits.
But it has been a continuum. I think attention spans have been decreasing exponentially as technology has been increasing accordingly.
4
The average Beatle song is less than 3 minutes long. Pop music (not all music) for my entire life (I'm 60) has consisted of short and repetitive songs (the exceptions just prove the rule).
6
@Steve G
Correction: the average early Beatles song is around 3 minutes. Their later stuff is longer.
5
If you say so, but that comes as a surprise to those of us who don't spend much time taking selfies in the bathroom or anywhere else.
30
“. . .flipping on a light switch, low-key extraordinary.” I guess I’m old. I can’t really think of any thing more boring than watching someone doing whatever in the bathroom. We’re doomed.
19
@Kb I think you're missing the point of the article. The bathroom is just the easiest place to film. Flip the switch Tik Toks are transformations. Where when the light comes back on something extraordinarily different is happening.
1
@Kb We sure are. Anything these people buy or shill for is all that matters.
1
@Alana "Where when the light comes back on something extraordinarily different is happening."
Alana- The "OK Boomers" truly hope the light comes back on for the Water Closet Chroniclers soon. This too shall pass.
It's really disappointing tor read these comments and see how dismissive the readers here are of things they don't understand, or take the time.
This is just the new way that people are expressing themselves, many of the videos are unflattering - they may be narcissist in their attempts to be seen as funny or clever, but it's not to show yourself off in the way a lot of these comments assume.
Yea, a lot of kids are self-absorbed they're teenagers, but no more so than the people here making fun of how kids are entertaining themselves to feel better about their own boring lives and hope they get a lot of "recommends" that agree with them.
12
No we ALL are not. Would never do this.
26
Nuh-uh...
I'm in the bathroom reading Michel Foucault.
22
@oogada Better you should read the book "The Seventh Function of Language" which explains a lot about Michael Foucault.
@oogada Ouch. "Discipline and Punish" is one book no one should ever read while sitting on the john!
1
How very...sanitary. Yuck.
Please, could a Millennial or two reply to this article to let us know that you're not ALL obsessed with taking stupid videos of yourselves. Otherwise, I'm going to cry for the future of humanity.
18
@AGJ
The people mentioned and interviewed in this article are not Millennials. They are Gen Zs. Different generational cohort.
1
@AGJ I’m not, but I did take some photos (for a significant other) in the (clean) bathroom just this week.
1
TikTok is primarily used by the generation AFTER millennials— if you’re going to criticize an entire segment of the population based one article, at least inform yourself on which (entire) generation you’re criticizing. (Coming from a millennial who does not use TikTok, by the way).
Not me!
16
On my You Tube channel I made a number of "Bathroom Reality TV" Episodes. I said that I did so because the subjects were very important, such as "Fukushima Bathroom Reality TV".
"There is truth in the kitchen." is what I said of kitchens early in my life from my experience of working in a kitchen at a dinner theater.
In my art centered around the values of strength, wisdom, beauty and humor, disrupted by spontaneous affections it has been a consistent search for the truth.
Between the kitchen and the bathroom the connection is clear.
@Russell Scott Day - In some people's minds the connection might be clear.
3
I blame their parents for failing to teach them that there is a time and a place.
22
too bad i spend my freetime recording history on social media, instead of my bathroom.
this article explains why i cant get my millennial high school friends into Nietzsche or Hegel or even Jung
6
If it leads to Teens keeping their bathrooms clean, I’m for it!
25
@Molly Bloom I bet most of their parents are doing it for them, to help them launch their respectable careers.
2
No, not "we."
"You."
40
I'm a millennial and I had a phase last year where I was addicted to TikTok, (Not anymore now. I've deleted my account and the app for good.) but I never ever liked the bathroom videos. I always quickly skip them. I just don't like the sight of random people's sinks and toilets. Ugh. I can't understand why people like them.
35
If Every Last One of these (18yo/+) don't vote Trump out of office, I will personally revoke their bathroom privileges for 4 YEARS, NO EXCEPTIONS.
Outhouse videos, anyone?
58
Narcissism reaches new pinnacles of achievement - previously unimaginable --
Right here in your own bathroom --
Future generations will look back on us with bewilderment - while asking the question - "What were those people thinking back then?" --
And they will not make the distinction between "those people" who shot videos of themselves in their bathrooms - and "those people" who voted for Donald Trump --
Why would they...?
9
I guess it's a generational thing. When I was active on Match, there were two profiles of women that were automatically dismissed: photos in the bathroom and photos behind the wheel. Anyone unable to select a better setting for their pics was of no interest.
24
@David Klumpp The worst is when someone's the victim of a crime and it's that sort of photo that is distributed all over the media. You want your loved one remembered in duckface?
3
A bathroom more than any other room in a home is the one that signifies privacy. Messaging an intimate environment suggestive of taking and distributing a provocative selfie on social media. This is me, a me in my private space and I’m allowing YOU out there the privilege of admittance.
8
@Rose That is the most hilarious thing I've read today. Thank you
4
@Rose
You mean it's a privilege to be in your possibly semi-sanitary bathroom?
5
Any of these selfie obsessed kids or adults that think we need to be reminded on a daily basis of what they look like need to get on with their lives. Or can't they because there's not much else going on?
Selfie culture is just admitting publicly how insecure you are.
47
Once again it's proven that the internet and electronic devices are dumbing down humanity. It's a freak show with no end in sight.
66
@LiquidLight My thoughts exactly.
5
@LiquidLight New technology always has that feel. Think about what people said about the telephone, the radio, the TV, video games, etc. People always say that and yet civilization still goes on, people create amazing things, art is not dead, writing is not obsolete, and we keep coming up with amazing things. And we will always have those who use technology in non-helpful ways and who are not very intelligent but that has also always been the case.
2
@Patricia there was a huge uproar when the printing press came to be too!
A couple Freudian ideas: the bathroom implies privacy--literally, but figuratively. It says, "What I'm about to say is what I really think, political correctness aside." When one leaves that space, they are subject to societal norms, and pressured to say the "right" things. That said, there is nothing intrinsically appealing about s bathroom. It just has become that place online for a panoply of reasons.
I can promise you with all of my sincerity, that in my 66 years of life, it has never, not even once, occurred to me to film myself (or anyone else) in the bathroom. Social media has monetized narcissism and become a primary tool for stunting the development of healthy social engagement.
140
@solar farmer AMEN to that. The only thing I want to see published in a bathroom is the tile and the fixtures.
30
@solar farmer Well stated. I pray for our future as I note the narcissism, the self-absorption, the need to be an influencer....
25
@solar farmer Get over your self. I know many, many teens and millennials who love social media and also have extremely well developed and healthy social interaction
6
OK KIDS.
I’m old.
50
Every time I believe we have discovered all of the facts we need to confirm our society has officially, and certifiably, gone insane yet another data point surfaces to prove we have not hit bottom yet.
80
“You open the door, you point the camera at the mirror, it’s a hook.”
We're finished as an informed society.
109
"We're all in the bathroom filming ourselves."
No. We're all really not.
200
What's this "We're all" stuff? I'm not doing that, and I don't know anyone who is. Must be a generation gap.
90
Agreed. Also cannot abide them ordering us about with "You Must" do, read, etc. XYZ. No, we mustn't, and I neither need nor want some whippersnapper ordering me about. Especially one who thinks taking videos of yourself in the loo is a good thing.
It's scary that the people who propel this nonsense are so other-directed that they measure themselves and others by their views. By which I don't mean politics, but now many times their snippets of nonsense are looked at. That's so pathetic, it's embarrassing.
5
I always used to wonder why do I look good in bathroom pics and not in other pics, I guess I know the secret now. Thanks @nytimes for the clarification!
5