I love this. Going to share it far and wide.
18
I enjoyed the Mrs. Maisel episodes but I was struck by how out of time the whole schtick was compared to the actual women comics of the 50's and sixties. Women then did not say nasty things about men or their husbands. They said self deprecating things. Phyllis Diller, Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball were the losers being laughed at. Women's lib came into view again in 1972. We have more freedom to speak now, but still can be attacked on race, sex and other uncomfortable topics.
We all seek to connect except the hermits and they connect sometimes anyway.
14
Wonderful article!
Stepping publicly outside of your comfort zone in a creative area can lead to some wonderful outcomes. You will discover things about yourself and people in general, that you can’t find in other ways. Going out there, in front of an audience, brings out a lot that is both good and bad (but much more of the former).
I’ve done environmental improv acting (taking a character and performing that character amongst other performers and paying audience) for decades, and a lot of the skills I learned there helped me in my regular professions.
Just make sure success is measured internally (did I improve, etc.) and not externally.
12
Second piece I've read in the Times today about needing to connect. First, the popular online teenager whose account was closed by Instagram; now the writer who wants to perform comedy.
I have a couple of got to know them first on the WEB friends, but from an e-mail forum from disenfranchised adjunct faculty members (now sort of defunct and I am retired). I have one friend from the dressing room at Talbot's; another from a trip on a canal boat in France.
The issue of connection in an era when people eschew religion intrigues me. Need to connect? IMO try church, where they really do have to let you in. (Sometimes, even a nice coffee hour!)
4
@Auntie Mame No, actually, they don't necessarily "let you in" (at church). One of the fastest ways to get the cold shoulder from church-going women is to answer "No" to the question, "do you have kids?" (although why that question is asked of total strangers is beyond me). Ugh. Such a "judgey" place -- church.
21
Really interesting/disturbing to see the way race is handled in this piece. Are we to assume that everyone except Sunghi, the comedian "with dreads," and the "Pakistani-American" landlord are white? Because that's the norm? And the rest of us need racial markers (because we are outside the norm?). What was the landlord's response? Why does Mrs. Sohn choose to exclude it? Is she uncomfortable because of her own biases, perhaps?
11
@Randall
I saw the set--the landlord's background (as a Muslim woman) was relevant because the joke was about secularism. Ms. Sohn was being self-deprecating (and charming). If you want to hear the entire joke, you can go see her perform.
29
@Randall - lighten up.
19
the issue of reace stood out for me as well. in the article. with your comment, I realize what there problem was: assumption of whiteness, unless otherwise noted...
6
Having experienced it second hand - sometimes that old movie cliché that you only feel really happy and alive when you are on stage is true.
2
I have always thought stand up comedy must be the most difficult performing art. No one to fall back on, and no amount of prep can guarantee a good set. Humor is so subjective and idiosyncratic. I really admire those who do it well.
31
You rock.
7
One is the loneliest number. We humans are social animals. We all need community.
12
A few hundred years ago, a pal of mine moved to L.A. to do standup. It was a struggle. He wasn't breaking out. Johnny Carson wasn't calling his agent.
One night a man came backstage and said to him, "You're not gonna make it as a standup comic, but you can write gags, so write for my show." He left my friend his business card.
My pal wrote for the man's show, and for many other shows. He made a great career writing funny lines for other people to speak.
Just to say, You can't hit the ball unless you swing at the ball. So keep swinging, kiddo. I admire your spunk.
47
But being on stage is what keeps her going...
3
Why do folks just coming out of a break-up bounce off immediately to dating again? I don' t understand it.
9
@Sharon M I'm with you. As a divorce lawyer I tell my folks to wait at least a year to start dating or they will be back to see me again. They never believe me, and sure enough I do their second divorce two years after their first.
30
@Sharon M I'm so glad that I'm not the only one to pick up on that. I've been single for years & I can't wrap my brain around people NOT being able to be NOT dating. Sure, I get horribly lonely at times, but, the organic feeling(s) of being alone & not having someone special in life, sometimes offer an amazing & powerful opportunity to grow & to get to know myself. Sheesh.
9
Well now I want to listen to your set!
16
Growth is the only sign of life.
Good on ya, Ms. Sohn.
15
Amy: Your article moves me to patronize open mics to encourage new comedians. How does one find open mic venues?
5
@Molly Bloom badslava dot com is one good attempt at a list
2
Cheaper than therapy and just as humiliating.
37
Keep on keeping on!
2
Awesome op-ed. Keep writing, keep performing.
10
So ... what was the line?
7
Loved this piece. How about a joke or two to hook us into coming? Can't hurt.
11
rooting for you!
6
Well done, you!
6
maybe rickles....... hysterical but fear inducing. particularly when talking about sex life jokes, etc. sometimes joke telling is risky in its intimacy.
it wasn't mentioned, but my fear ( if i was a female comic in these venues) would be getting hit on by a bunch of sleazy guys. particularly with so much drinking involved.
3
I do wish you the best of luck in your comedic turns. You are braver than I.
(And I am shocked, *shocked* that the men you've been dating have been taking Viagra right in front of you. They should do it the old-fashioned way: privately in the bathroom, snorted using a lucky $2 bill inherited from his grandfather--like God intended)
(**please do not actually take Viagra this way)
12
Loved this! Best wishes for a funny future. We'll be waiting.
15
This is one of the most real, relatable stories I've read in the NYT in quite a long time. And I'm not divorced or Jewish or New Yorker. Amy Sohn's writing and humor seem to transcend labels and speak to the human soul. Thank you for sharing your humor -- and your story.
39
Geez, you thought you were funny but you brought me to tears. There’s something about rising up to confront vulnerability that always inspires. The world needs more transparency and nobody does that better than comedians. Thanks for the joyful ending.
33
Extremely inspired! Life is meant to be enjoyed, so why not have fun?
16
The writer keeps likening herself to Mrs. Maisel, but that character ignored and neglected her children to the point of abuse. I couldn’t get past the narcissism, immaturity and selfishness of the not so marvelous Mrs. Maisel. Or the disturbing ethnic stereo types in the show. I stopped watching before her career really took off.
Not a good role model.
17
@Passion for Peaches
Thanks for putting into words my intuitions.I only watched a few episodes so I couldn't quite articulate why I didn't like it. But it definitely made me uncomfortable.
9
@Passion for Peaches I think the children here were simply a plot device. Obviously her after marriage situation would have been totally different without children as a factor. The comedy was about her, not the children. I inhaled the whole series and I thought it and the period aspect was fantastic!
27
@Passion for Peaches Interesting comment. Although I loved Mrs. Maisel and am looking forward to seeing the next installments, I too was uncomfortable with her behavior (or lack thereof) with her children. However, then I thought about if Mr. Maisel had been a sucessful comic, left the kids with his wife or mother and gone off to clubs, would we be uncomfortable or angry with him. Her mother is taking care of the kids. Let Mrs. Maisel fly, I say!
46
Love this! So nice to read these real issues and how Amy Sohn is dealing with them.
One thing that confused me. She says "last month" she went to her first open mic at EastVille but the series of events after that seem to have taken place over more than a month. Is this really only a month?
1
Keep working, keep writing! Oh, that was my own joke! I find you so brave for going outside of your comfort zone, which certainly became suddenly uncomfortable! I love "Mrs. Maisel" for the same reason. I hope to see your act sometime, but I suspect you'll get alot out of it even if you don't hit it big! You're already a success!
14
Loved this.
10
Congrats and kudos to you, this seems to fit right into what Jerry Seinfeld and Eddie Murphy said on Comedians....
8
Keep going Amy ! See you on Amazon ( hint: more mature comedy than Netflix !)
10
She is far funnier than the show
7
I can't tell which is lovelier; the article or the person who wrote it.
23
2 February's ago I visited NYC with my then 21 year-old daughter, staying in an AirBNB on the LES.
We went to Old Man Hustle for an open mic night. When we walked in the bartender in this smallest club ever asked if I wanted on the list . . . that's how we found out it was an open mic night!
A few dreadful, a few ok-ish, a few funny, at least one was hilarious. All them courageous, including the bartender!
While my daughter and I sat and chatted at the bar, I said, "I could do 20 minutes on your my mother, but I can't do the first minute". Over my daughter's shoulder I saw an eavesdropper's knowing nod.
After Amy's story, I am compelled to try at least for the first five.
38
Hi Amy, Bravo for this piece, for your bravery, and for your encouragement. You made my whole day!
25
Comics turn terrible into funny. "Just give it some time, kid. If you survive, it'll be a joke someday." Is this because human existence is inherently funny but we can't see the joke when we are standing in the middle of it? I dunno. Think I'll go ask Samuel Becket. Or some other infinite jester.
The line about getting married, then divorced so the comic could come up with a good joke reflects the reality that they have to live through bad things to use them for material. Really bad things, better jokes. No wonder comics are off balance, they look for the bad in life and hug it till it starts laughing.
34
@Doug Terry this is exactly why the kids of rich people are bores, never having to face any strife in their lives. I know a few and not one has a funny story to tell.
4
absolutely brilliant! Courage and determination for renewal that all of us in the same situation hope for.
23
This is humorous, honest, insightful and encouraging. It seems to be about connecting without a full embrace. Sharing just a bit of oneself without stripping down entirely. At the same time, dipping the toes into the water to experience something different. However and wherever you go, I'll be applauding.
50
Amy, well done. I know what you mean when you say that you don't know why you keep going back to the mic's; and that perhaps it is a sense of community/fellowship with fellow-mic'ers.
Though I was singing and playing guitar for many years, it was only when I got past the age of 60 that I plucked up the courage to perform in public.
Last year I found an ('all ages') open mic in my town and I've become a regular there - performing and trying out songs. I keep going back because the community there is supportive. I'm old enough to be their father or grandfather, yet they greet me warmly and cheer me on each time I perform.
Lovely feeling.
Yes, I do some gigs now (some paid, some not) -- and I keep returning to my open mic spot because I'm most comfortable there.
Keep going, Amy.
72
Dear Amy
Thanks for writing this article. I would love to come and see you perform (and pay for it to boot)! Wishing you all the best in your new career.
From,
A fellow professional mom of 2 daughters
73