Happy Father's Day, to you and your husband!
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I’ve never been so touched by a letter to the editor. Thank you.
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My nephew grew up in the West Village - meer steps from Christopher Street and numerous gay bars...drag and not.
As a toddler he always looked forward to greetings from bar patrons - be they drag queens or bears.
The only thing better in his mind at the time would have been a drag firefighter - with the truck.
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The outrageous bravery of drag queens is to me eternally epitomized by their desegregation of the formerly all-male Philadelphia Mummers' Parade (2013). That they could walk that route in stilettos while tolerating the uber-dumpy fashion statements of the string bands (men in frocks that would suit Raggedy Ann dolls) is truly a miracle. How can anybody not love drag queens?
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The guy that said “some life for your kid” is the one with problems. The number one being mind your own business especially in NYC.
44
I did not expect this article to live up to the astounding artwork above it. I was delighted to find it otherwise.
38
Google Rollerena for a ton of pix, more power to her.
All the best to Corvette Hunt, be fabulous.
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"The real cure was a pride so fearless..."
This writer's words have said it all.
Thank-you.
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I love that Rollerena was in that parade!! How amazing that she spoke to you through her presence on TV as a child and then in person decades later! And her advice is terrific and spot-on for any parent! Yay for you and yay for Rollerena! Thank you for this wonderful piece of writing!
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Yes it is some life for your son, a life with caring parents. Thank you for your wonderful column.
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This is beautiful, thanks.
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Terrific story. Fierce, yet touching. Bravo.
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Be fierce, queen, and slay those dragons of childhood! Thank to so much for sharing your story, the hurt, the heartache, the bullying, none of which any of us wants to have happen to us, whether they are our family, people we thought were our friends, or kids at school or in our communities. Your son is so fortunate to have two loving parents, both of whom are not allowing your pasts to define your son's future, who's son is growing up in a much more accepting time despite recent setbacks by temporary events and close-minded people who will push themselves back into the dark corners from whence they came.
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Thank you
23
Years ago, my daughter from my first marriage (to a woman) was dating a young man who took her to his church one Sunday where she was blindsided by the sermon of the day, which was basically gays are going to hell. My daughter was always very close to me, and loves both me and my husband, who has been with me now for about 30 years. So the sermon infuriated her. I told her that if she was going to want her boyfriend to understand and tolerate her beliefs, she would need to understand and tolerate his. In hindsight, I think the message was wrong, but my daughter was smart enough to recognize on her own that you can't tolerate intolerance. She broke off with the boy and later married someone whose thinking was much closer to hers.
We try to protect our kids, and sometimes we make bad choices when we do. If it is all done in a loving spirit, though, I believe things will work out for the best in the end.
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@candideinnc
I don't think your message to your daughter was wrong. It's never wrong to try to understand someone else's point of view. And by telling her what you did, you communicated to her that you have confidence in her ability to arrive at conclusions that are in her best interests. I wish more people had your attitude.
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Excellent moral. Fabulous parenting skills. You're an asset to your country and community. If only every parent around the world understood the importance of acceptance, support, and unconditional love for their children, the world would be a much better place. As it is now, it's a world full of hate, blame, and judging.
You're a gift to this world, and so is your child.
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What a fine piece of writing. Thank you so much.
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There is good news in that many mainline denominations now too share the pride as the true manifestation of God’s unconditional love.
17
"Listen to your boy" and help him listen to himself. He will know. Help him know the pride in himself and in you that Rollerena knew. That will give him the courage to live in the world as the person he is and to politely but firmly say no to anyone who thinks otherwise.
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Your story brought tears to my eyes. I felt for the pain that ugly man brought to you on the West Village street and I applauded you for your strength and pride in yourself and your son. Great writing.
44
Thank you so much for this story of love and courage, please keep sharing. You are a wonderful parent.
34
What a joyful image of son atop dad's shoulders waving the flag of inclusion - truly, a moment of pride.
We should not lose sight of the facts that drag queens were the courageous front line of the LGBTQ movement long before it enjoyed a five-letter acronym and long before gay rights were the 'cause celebre' for liberal Americans.
If this were my child (and my husband and I raised seven of our own) I would consider that rainbow flag a blessing and perhaps an anointment that were signs of great things to come. How wonderful to see a child raised by open-minded parents in a community that cares about him.
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Bravo! I agree. At last a non political editorial not accusing President Trump of every imaginable wrongdoing. I continue to read the NYT because occasionally it prints an impartial and worthwhile article; and this piece is an excellent example.
13
There is nothing impartial about this article.
16
I love this! There is so much that is universal about parenthood in this story that is also very particular to the author. Bravo!
35
I took my kid to Stonewall once, not during an event of any sort. She looked for about 30 seconds, then made a beeline for the pet shop next door which had three French Bulldog pups in the window. So much for a sense of history.
But my wife and I are dog-sitting for her next weekend when she and her friends are attending DC Pride.
71
That cranky guy was right. It is going to be some life for your son. A life with dads that love him, protect him while allowing him to become whatever he will. He's a lucky kid to have someone like you for a father.
Each of us has within ourselves our own destiny and it is the fabulous parent who recognizes that and is thrilled with us while we search for that destiny.
Thank you for the wonderful story.
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I worked my church's booth at the annual "Family Pride" fair yesterday. While I cannot claim to have witnessed every possible variation on the idea of family, I saw and spoke with many of those possibilities. Two dads, one wearing a chubby baby in a sling while the other held a toddler's hand. A mom and and dad who asked for rainbow flags for their five kids. A multigenerational, "intentional" family of men who expressed their sadness at their own church's quiet rejection of them. And many families of all kinds who asked for temporary LOVE tattoos (in rainbow letters) for their cheeks so they could walk through the fair loving each other and broadcasting their support for the love shared by all the other families.
And there were drag queens, in their chaotic, excessive, larger than life wonderfulness.
Thank you for your beautiful piece. Blessings to you and your family. You are lucky to have each other.
108
What a revelation - we should ALL listen to our children! Your son is so lucky to be blessed with parents who love and want him. He'll have an amazing life!
77
Your child’s life will be full of love, support and the freedom to be whoever he wants to be. I always tell my daughter to love whoever she wants to love. If people can’t deal with that, then that’s how we know that those people aren’t worth knowing. Good luck to you and your family.
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I remember being in a now defunct "gay restaurant" (so named because of the gay staff and the welcome it gave gay customers), one night when Rollerena came it. She was galvanizing. My late partner and I said to each other, "That's why we moved [from Boston] to Manhattan."
I'm glad she was able to help you as much as she did.
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“Some life for that kid.”
Actually, it sounds like "that kid" - the author's kid - is going to have an amazing life with two caring parents who care deeply for their child and want to do what all parents do - protect their child.
I'm saddened that the author's parents were misguided in their attempt to protect him - their child - from pain. One can blame that on ignorance and ignorance-based fear of the unknown.
The comments from the passerby were just nasty.
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The discomfiting truth is that no parent can fully protect their children from any danger, be it the cruelty in others, or physical harms. There are at present two op eds from parents struggling with the unthinkable loss of their children, taken at different ages and under different circumstances, both painful beyond words.
What you and your husband offer your son is the best one can give to kids: a sense of dignity and confidence, enjoyment of the life they have, and your unconditional love. Someday, when your child reads this, he will understand and fully appreciate how much shelter he has with his family.
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