Dave Iztkoff (sp?) has a lovely sensitivity when writing about vulnerable people, which is apparent in his work. Hats off to him for proving once again what a fine writer he is.
20
She's a fine actress and gracious human being. Apparently this book took courage far beyond the average celebrity bio.
My very best to her and I look forward to her book.
36
Not mentioned in the article is “Maybe I’ll Come Home in the Spring,” about a girl who runs away from home. To watch her go from Gidget to a troubled teen was astounding. And, as I grew up identifying with her, it made me realize that people who seem happy may be hiding their angst.
It was all acting but the message seemed real enough. That’s why I think she’s one of the great ones.
24
"Places in the Heart"is one of my all time favorite movies that
starred Sally Field. I think,possibly, some of the horrific life
experiences of Ms.Field's life may have been important emotional
archives that she could tap into to breathe life into certain
characters such as the widowed mother in the movie I
mentioned above. I admire her for writing such a book.
22
How to write a book:
*Be a celebrity
*Have a stepfather
*Make sure Stepfather is evil behind his jolly good guy persona
*Dig up as many unhappy sexual encounters possible especially as child (by stepfather or mother's friend etc)
*Make sure to name other celebrity names negatively and don't tell them you are writing about them.
*Blame as many people as possible for your so called sad life even though you are famous and have had a great career
*End the book by sobbingly confessing to your old and dying Mom who tells you "you are not alone and cries forgiveness etc.
*Write a book about all your sad perceived ills in life especially about someone who just died eg: Burt Reynolds.
I never liked Sally Fields and now I like her less.
*Next actor.....please step up and tell us your sad story which none of us are really interested in anymore. How about just appreciating your success?
20
Zeldie, in your criticism of a successful person who complains about her difficulties, remember that success doesn’t equal happiness.
Given some of the things that happened to her, there’s a good chance you and I are happier people than she, if less famous. Why shouldn’t she tell her story? It is what it is, and her fame means it’ll sell better than your story or mine would. She’s using her fame to show us that success doesn’t confer happiness; something we’d all do well to remember.
56
@Zeldie Stuart
but that's her story. you mean, ... just keep quiet...don't share? why....? when an artist chooses to tell.. to be honest and share the ugly stuff... someone out there will not feel so alone or be so alone... you are wrong. I have not read the book yet... but it is hard to believe Sally sees her life as 'sad" She has had vast success, and three wonderful sons... this is your interpretation.
45
Not my first choice for mom in Forrest Gump (she and Tom Hanks are, what, 10 years apart?), but always enjoyed her in her many other films.
3
@sthomas1957
When Forrest was in elementary school in the beginning of the film Sally Field was 39 years older than Forrest played by Michael Conner Humphreys. So the producers kept her on and aged her. Makes sense!
13
By coming forward with her story of abuses Sally Field shows us once again what it's like to be a female in a world where most of the money and power is held by males. Does anyone doubt that casting couch ultimatums still occur on a regular basis? Or that stepfathers, uncles, neighbors, family friends or clergy still sexually assault underage girls and boys? These are not isolated incidents. They are common occurrences that affect both sexes in every demographic. They are most often not reported, to anyone, let alone to law enforcement. The #metoo movement has helped illuminate the problem to the general public, as will Ms. Field's book, but we know from experience that the threat of being caught is not a deterrent for males who will use power and money to sexually abuse both females and males. A stepfather holds power over a stepdaughter. A Catholic priest holds power over a child left in their care. A movie director holds power over an actress who's auditioning for a role. Shaming the abusers, suing them or throwing them in jail is too little, too late. If we are truly outraged by what's been revealed to us in the past 20 years we must create solutions that stop the abuse in the first place. I applaud Ms. Field for coming forward. And I will likely read her book. But blowing the horn is not enough. We need a #nomore movement.
47
I worked with Jock O'Mahoney and found him a delightful and accomplished actor and stuntman. Now, I'm shocked and disgusted with him.
No surprise now how so many in Hollywood have feet of clay.
Yet Hollywood's full of talent willing to tell us how to vote.
8
Those of us born in 1945-1955 lived in turbulent times in which secrets were kept and children were seen but not heard. For too many of the young girls of the era the secrets were of the men called 'fathers' who quietly molested us-too often with the 'mother's' enabling the actions.
We had nowhere to run, or to hide, or to tell-not even a county judge would entertain the idea that a child has no reason to lie about her(or his) abuse. For myself, I was looked at askance, called an ingrate, and labeled incorrigible by the court and adoptee! by the community. Neither of which were meant as complements.
Fields at least escaped this, but her molestation was a shadow to her life, just as mine has been. She has my empathy and sympathy. Her book may well be the catharsis she needs to fight the slings and arrows of outrageous fortunes.
71
I'm about a decade younger than you Ms. Fields, and I remember watching you as a child. Over the years, I've enjoyed your performances, especially Norma Rae and Hello, My Name is Doris. I'm sorry that you personally have had to suffer so much pain. Do rest assured, though, that you have given joy to many others, and continue to be a source of inspiration for actors at the beginning of their careers, and those who will come after.
32
Celebrity confessionals offer plenty of titillation, but little real insight. The conclusions about the social and psychological forces that shaped the writer and contributed to his or her happiness, suffering, success or failure, almost always turn out to parrot the pop mythology and ethos of the day. But they do sell nicely.
7
I’ve always respected her talent and her honesty. Obviously, this book is primarily for her own therapy. It also helps her immediate family and close friends. But why reveal the names of living persons who apparently treated her badly decades ago. Jimmy Webb and Bob Rafelson didn’t need to be dragged through the mud. Why not just refer to “a well-known singer” and “a successful Hollywood Director”?
5
@Cloud 9 Perhaps because women have been protecting men from the men's own bad behavior for too long? Why shouldn't she be able to be honest about something that happened to her? Why are we still trying to silence women in 2018?
79
Brava. The Norma Rae story....but of her own life. The courage of women is so much greater because they are disadvantage in power and physical strength....but often greater in heart and soul.
A lesson learned in my youth from my mother who was paralyzed when I was one, who lived a life of spirit and love that transcended her flaccid body.
8
There is an aura of sadness about her presence, even in her comic performances. Now we can see why. She's had a tough life even in her success apparently.
34
@Snip. She made choices
1
every time I read about one of these Hollywood
celebrities and their tell all books,I am amazed
that not one of them ever calls the police.even
the victims of Weinstein, in spite of all that he
allegedly did to them,went back again and again
to beg him for work.I make it a point never to
waste my time reading these books, but your
fine work both in interviews and the Weinstein
exposes convince me that for years and years,
possibly even now, this is the accepted way
of playing the Hollywood game.until the
victims,alleged victims,start complaining to
the police, I will remain skeptical, as very
uncomfortable as it makes me feel
6
Do any of these Hollywood celebrities have good sexual relationships or is it always bad and abusive?
17
Sadly makes me wonder if Burt got a hold of an advance copy
7
Before my wife of now 53 years of faithful marriage and I met in Los Angeles, my wife took a high school drama class with Sally Field.
Funny how life turns out. One never knows.
10
@SK beyond irrelevant
8
Norma Rae...best ever..
18
Thank you Sally - thank you so much for doing this - so many women thank you since we don't have a voice and have similar memories from our childhood/adolesece - it is so hard to come forward and so frightening - thank you for doing this - we all know it is hard to talk about these memories that have been suppressed but we need to do this for this new generation - to prevent this from happening again and again - we are united by you and we never had this before - thank you - thank you
35
Knowing what I know at my advanced age (sigh), I believe Sally Field is telling us what really happened. I believe her.
I also believe that Burt Reynolds was a generous, wild, free-spirited man, and I want to believe that his bond with Ms. Field was mostly a wonderful romance and an enduring friendship, no matter what problems they might have had in their relationship.
Before reading this piece, I had never before heard of the film director who required a sexual bribe from Ms. Field. I am inclined to believe that back in the day this kind of quid pro quo was standard fare in the movie industry. The director is likely little different from many of his contemporaries in this respect.
The incident with the singer is hard for me to understand without knowing more, but for me the lines are clear: forcibly having sexual pleasure (or any pleasure) with an non-consenting woman (or any person) is wrong. It is a matter of showing ordinary respect for another human being. If that is what happened, it was wrong when it happened. If it was a drug-induced, ambiguous encounter, I do not have anything to say, except that I prefer to avoid such encounters!
As for the step-father, he must have been a disordered, sick man, who did not understand his own perversion, and who caused lifelong suffering in his wake.
Above all, Sally Field is a wonderful, soulful, sincere person, who I hope will fine every happiness and every consolation that this life can offer her.
57
no matter, i liked this woman. i loved to watch her portray her characters.....i regret her sorrowful youth.
51
@cathyO
Yeah, me too (all of it).
5
After reading this “review”— I think Sally Field is one tough woman.
50
I always held Sally Field in high regard. I think she is a terrific actress and she seems to be a charming woman. I do feel protective of Jimmy Webb, however. My husband and I are avid Jimmy Webb fans. We have shaken his hand and chatted with him after his shows. He has always been attentive and kind. In his show, he is very open and honest about a druggy past, is sober now and has embraced the religion of his youth. He is married to a nice woman who is often at his shows. He’s in his early seventies. Since both Ms. Field and Mr. Webb were quite high on drugs at the time of the incident in the sixties, I don’t see the point of this story. Back in the day, I can remember how strong hash was. It could leave you addled and totally out of it, almost paralyzed. If she is not accusing Mr. Webb of rape, and admits that he was “stoned out of his mind,” then what is her intent, other than to embarrass or hurt him now. How is this story helpful to either of them? I feel terrible that her stepfather sexually abused her and that that his atrocities had lasting effects regarding her life choices. How could they not? But I am wondering if a memoir must reveal every unfortunate sexual encounter. People make mistakes in life, especially when under the influence of powerful drugs. Seems like she isn’t taking any responsibility whatsoever here. Maybe if I read the book, I would have an understanding of why this story was included, but I don’t feel compelled to buy it now.
23
@Kathryn
Her own behavior - her choice of the men she was with - her need for approval from them even if their behavior was not always loving, and possibly at times abusive, and was shaped by being sexually abused and exploited by her stepfather - not once, but repeatedly, a part of her young life. She was trained to deal with a self centered pedophile stepfather and that sets a pattern.
That she could grow beyond this shows strength.
She had to disown her childhood through her her young life: there was no one to share it with. Not even her mother. It causes great shame and confusion in children.
She has the right to access every part of her own life. The encounters are part of HER complicated existence.
I was fond of Burt Reynolds as an entertainer -- but is it really a shock that he was controlling? He was vicious in his attacks on Loni Anderson - -
What is her intent? To explain who she is and what she has lived through.
80
@Kathryn Then don’t buy it. Who cares? It’s not YOUR story, it’s HERS. Just because you like Jimmy Webb doesn’t mean he never behaved badly.
22
@MJ and Cheryl - i don’t doubt that something exactly as Ms. Field describes or something close to it happened. I’m not questioning her veracity. I’m wondering why she told it publically, (since she now says Mr. Webb didn’t have ill intent), except to embarrass or hurt him. The sixties were sexually wounding for many - sex, drugs and rock and roll held opportunities for bad things to happen. She could have confronted Mr. Webb or written him and told him the incident still haunted her. Seems like he was blindsided by her revelation and said he chose not to “out” her publically when he wrote HIS memoir. Apparently, they did heavy drugs together while dating. She has the right to say anything about anyone in her book and of course her childhood history informed her choices of men to be with. She has every right to her fury. I just question why trash a man now who has cleaned up his act and is finding happiness in his later years. Men have feelings too and can be very tenderhearted and sensitive. What she chose to relate seemed mean-spirited and sensational. AND, I haven’t read the book, just this article. It is starting to seem to me that most men are the bad guys and that takes away from the fact that some men are VERY bad guys. Her stepfather was a monster.
2
Very few can write a good memoire. Most have no perspective on themselves or what makes a time or happening interesting. I wish Ms. Fields well but I can't find anything in this article that is more than a People Magazine style reveal.
9
@Jana Weldon
FYI: This article is not a sample of Sally Field's writing.
16
Honestly, I have been secretly enamored with Ms. Fields since the Flying Nun.
A truly beautiful women and human being.
(and that one shot from "Stay Hungry", still one of the best ever).
MB
7
sally field...........of course you have a voice........more than a voice......know how much you have been loved and are certainly still now loved, by your admired. .
20
Is there no decency?
Readers who are reasonably perceptive can sense the ax being ground, to a fine sharp edge, in the backroom.
This is not the plucky twin, the busy flying nun, the standup union organizer, the woman "we like, we really, really like", not the thespian I knew as a kid.
This version has pegged all of life's confusing hurts on...well,
Jimmy Webb is responsible, the lout.
And Burt. The lout. Didn't like "parts of my personality."
Oh, the louts.
And 'I kissed a man to get a part', though the man doesn't remember it that way. Nor does Jimmy Webb. Who said he left her out of his book because...well, decency.
We can't ask Burt.
Am I cynical to say that this book has a flavor of influence from a particular movement, and the career and relationship portions given us here, comport well with women courageous to come forward but with stories (I'm not talking about the rape cases, but the muddling 'squeeze' in photographs, or a pass, or request for a kiss that is not followed by assault...hopefully that's clear now) that suddenly show the subject in a passivity inconsistent with their age and being an adult.
Did #MeToo do this to the book, with boxes checked off now,
We'll have to see when more than excerpts are available. Maybe modesty will show up. Because, honestly, to suggest as she has that "learning another craft", called writing, and 'that's real hard...' probably has a few writers biting a knuckle.
16
@Scotty: i grew up in a house full of women. i can tell you with absolute certainty that your lofty & dismissive tone is the very reason that "particular movement" exists. your attempts at denigrating women will never hide the fear you have of them... i actually pity you.
122
@Scotty If a stepfather abuses his daughter, then no, there is no decency. And I, for one, welcome the daughter’s story if it helps others. People think these things are their own dirty secrets, and their own fault, before they learn it didn’t just happen to them.
103
I always had a soft spot for Sally Fields. She was strong, yet vulnerable or the other way around. I pray for her to find peace and hope to see more of her going forward.
46
I worked for Sally in the early 1990s when she had her own film company. She was the least star-y of the several stars and producers I worked for at the time and was unfailingly unguarded, kind, and genuinely interested in what I had to say. She even hand-picked meaningful and thoughtful Christmas gifts for the people who worked for her (in addition to quietly dispensing cash bonuses) -- something that was unheard of among her peers, who would, at best, have their assistants pick up something generic. Even recently, when she was appearing onstage in New York, she lived simply in my friend's apartment building and was often seen carrying dirty laundry to and from the laundry room in a hamper, doing her own household chores while giving eight performances a week. That may seem like nothing outside of the business, but given that virtually no one of her stature lives that way, it indicates what her priorities are -- to stay connected to the grounding reality of everyday life. I wish her all the best with this memoir and in all things.
307
I remember Ms. Field's riveting, brilliant performance in "Sybil" -- how it raised the hair on the back of my neck; the fear and fascination evoked watching her breathe life into the splintered selves of a horribly abused young woman. Joanne Woodward's character's fierce commitment to meet "Sybil" and to hold all of her fragmented parts with kindness and compassion was equally life-changing to watch. Their acting was a tour de force embodying both horror and redemption. Now reading this interview provides an enlightened understanding of how Ms. Field's was able to imbue this and other characters so powerfully. Her finding her voice is a significant triumph.
60
How unsurprising that Rafelson and Webb refute Sally Field's accounts, as have many of the men who've commented on the article. Gaslighting is the first step in men's abuse of women, and obviously it's as popular as ever.
139
Ms. Field gave an incredible performance as Abby's mother on the TV show ER. Her portrayal of bipolar disorder and its impact on her adult daughter was remarkable.
37
What a testament to the transformational power of the arts. Certainly undeniable for Sally Field, who found her voice through acting and now writing, We have all gained something in the process.
44
"You like me! You really like me!"
This was laughed at, made fun of, imitated (Jim Carey, for example, in "The Mask") and gave us one impression of Sally Field, a wrong one of a shallow, silly, insecure woman.
Now we know that Ms. Field's reaction comes from a far deeper and darker place, a place no woman or man, should have in their past, of being abused solely for the selfish perverted pleasure of some sick adult. The only part of our impression that was correct, was the insecurity, now well understood, and undeserved on her part. She doesn't deserve what happened to her, that clearly poisoned her success and talent.
Look around you, men and women. I'll bet you know those who have been raped, abused as children, sexually assaulted. Despite ALL the news, all the reports, all the branding as "Sex offenders" it just keeps happening.
All those children abused by 300 clerics in Pennsylvania, who actually MARKED children (with a particular gold-colored cross) who had been abused so other abusers could abuse them again!
Even the President of the United States has been accused of such abuse, during his friendship with billionaire Jeffrey Epstein, a CONVICTED pedophile!
How do we stop it? How do we identify and treat potential predators before they start violating victims? Even a former Senator, Nancy Kassebaum, daughter of Alf Landon, was a victim! 1 out of 5 women, 1 out of 10 men are victims
Sally Field is another victim, famous or not.
134
Well, I don't know about "poisoned her success and talent". Obviously, she is and has been a talented and successful person. :/
7
@kynola You misunderstand me. I mean that the horrible actions of her stepfather and others made success, for Sally Field, less sweet, and harder to enjoy.
6
we should have known, we should have guessed.
Always sunny, never a bad word about anybody.
Victims of abuse are the best cover-uppers we will ever know.
Good for you Ms. Fields, good for you.
YES, you DO have a voice, and I for one am glad you did not pull the book back.
Peace, I wish you peace.
173
Dear Sally,
We like you! We really like you!
Looking forward to the book.
73
@Agrwhv
A lot of us really love you, Sally, and your amazing body of work.
7
This was a very sad story about more men abusing their daughters. When is it going to end. We know President Trump has abused 19 women . The fact that they can't testify against him is sending a wrong message it is ok for men to abuse the women. He needs to be in jail for those crimes. As long as the same like minded men see him getting away with this they will do it over and over again. Very sad. Lock the violators up.
93
@D.j.j.k.
Better yet, turn them all into eunuchs.
20
Always liked Sally Field. She seems like one of those people who belongs to the human club but got swept up in celebrity to make a living. Of course she was strong enough to share these personal stories. She's a real human being.
107
@Turgid-And a genuine one who's been willing to be vulnerable and tell the truth time after time, while in the public eye.
26
“I can’t deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me.” Sally Fields March 25, 1985
13
Instill really really like Sally Field
All the best
25
Sadly, in my small two-block neighborhood in the late 1950s, there were 3 men who became known for victimizing girls. Two were fathers who abused their daughters. One man abused four of his children. The other used his elder daughter as his "wife' when his actual spouse became crippled in an accident. The third man abused my young female cousin who lived in the apartment above my family's. My mother discovered the abuse and had him prosecuted. Ultimately, he was jailed. My cousin, who just turned 70, still suffers from the consequences of that abuse. Who know how many others he victimized? Who knows who is yet suffering? The other two men were never prosecuted or punished for their offenses. I will bet their daughters are hurting even now from their actions. This was in a small, deeply religious neighborhood in a tiny town in Massachusetts. All this occurred at a time when "Father Knows Best" was a highly watched program, when life was considered ideal, when mothers were home all day baking cookies and maintaining "perfect" homes. I don't understand how anyone can be surprised, shocked,or bewildered, by what Ms. Fields is revealing. I am especially disconcerted and appalled by the negative judgements of her. This behavior was and is as common as air - or dirt.
316
@Ihaveanotheropinion
Someone in your neighborhood knew and they did, and I suspect it was more that just one person.
Better yet they took action. Many married women of that era just produced children and lived horrid lives of denial, stupor and emotional and spiritual emptiness. At age 70 I still deal with resolving my 'core primal issues' of that era: My sadistic violent father and my additionally cold violent mother who was a poseur and a textbook borderline personality nut. Then the Roman Catholic Convent School in Vermont and its daily diet of total control, guilt and sex negative abuse of all variation and perversion!
Having very wealthy neighbors, it's more than easy to say how fully crazy, narcissistic and self absorbed 99% of them all were. How could they not be. Aside and apart from Ms. Fields journey in never never land, the more this is discussed at a higher therapeutic level, the better off we all will be long term as we turn towards ture mental health, authentic love and caring for oneself and others.
Men and yes, women who sexually abuse children are oddly an understudied group psychologically as about 50% were never sexually abused directly, but are frozen developmentally at an infantile age. Worse, children of that era were more like objects and products than the children of loving and deeply caring parents. How could it not go on then. Today? It's all on the table for discussion and decades overdue.
13
@Ephemerol
So sorry for your pain. I agree, we need to have these issues on the table. And perhaps some of the pain of the past can be mediated.
6
Thank you Sally Fields for telling the truth.
We, the freedom loving Americans, seem to believe that ours is the only true way, but Sally's story will shatter false ideals that have and may never be attained. But with truth we can begin to open to new possibilities and to actually achieve these ideals, instead of pretense. We must change to survive, but unless we hear the truth we will not change.
Thank you Sally Fields for your courage to set the story straight. Peace. You did a good thing for all of us, as disappointed and angry some will be to learn the truth.
50
Kierkegaaard said, “I see it all perfectly; there are two possible situations — one can either do this or that. My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do not do it — you will regret both."
Ms. Field's need to write a "tell-all" demonstrates that she hasn't learned enough about the mishegoss of living, even at 72. If she ever figures things out, she will regret writing her book.
9
@judgeroybean I concur. "I didn't want to hurt him any further," referring to Reynolds, and then, "recreate a version of relationship with her stepfather."
Then mind reading - "have to defend himself or lash out, which he probably would have. I did not want to hurt him any further."
Yes, you did. Hurt him further? Means you hurt him before - meaning you're not a saint, or solely, a victim, as this piece does it's best to lay out. 35 years after the end of a relationship with Burt, and she's able to position well in the current climate.
The need to air dirty laundry, get those 15 more minutes, is really something. Maybe Burt was no prize, but he left the stage with more respect, IMHO.
I guess 82 teaches more than 72.
7
She hardly seems like someone who is trying to 'get those 15 more minutes' since she's had a lifetime of fame.
18
@Jason Powers You said more explicitly what I was trying to say, but in particular, I thought your take on Burt's passing -- that you felt with what is missing from the memoir: respect. Respect for yourself, and others.
As a young girl, her "Gidget" was the personification of everything I was not. But now I know we had something much more important in common.
90
Ms. Field had "a secret abortion in Tijuana when she was 17"? So that would have been around 1963.
Thank goodness for Roe v. Wade, ten years later.
214
@G. Your math is off. I was born in 1945 and a HS graduate in 1963, just two months into my 18th year. At 71 now, Fields was most likely born in 1947, the same age as my younger sister. The point, in 1963 she would have been 16, not 18.
As for R v W … taking another's life at the convenience of your own is morally and ethically wrong.
You are so loved Sally Fields. I'm glad you can talk about what happened to you and help us understand better who you are. You are human after all, first and foremost. And that is why there are so many of us who care. I have empathized with your tender heart forever even though I didn't always understand it. Thank you for being real and being kind.
75
Wow Sally, how lonely and how we failed you. My heart goes out to you.
28
Did she have any good, positive relationships with anyone? Seriously. If all of the things that she tells about actually happened to her, then she is one of the most abused people on earth. But she is such a soaring success. I don’t get it.
5
@Tom Actually, her story is not showing her as being " one of the most abused people on earth", but rather an unfortunately all too "normal" example of the stories of many many women. You need some educating I believe.
64
@Tom
Well, Tom, how do you, especially as a man, define success?
9
She is not the most abused woman on earth. She is pretty typical. It unfortunately is not at all rare to have been abused as a child, raped, and sexually harassed at work. I know all of these things to be true of myself and many women friends.
84
Oh my heart, dearest Ms. Fields. As I was reading this profile, I kept thinking of the cartoon published not long after Marilyn Van Debur wrote her book, showing her adult hand reaching for a child shaking in her bed. Thank you for telling your story. I cannot imagine the courage it took to write it. Every time a remarkable, beloved, accomplished woman like you says, "Yes, this happened to me as a little girl. I, too, was shattered by it, and my life has been messy and painful," a little of my shame falls away. May you know that you are loved and admired, no matter how others respond to your book. Congratulations on reclaiming your voice.
167
Real. True.
And painful.
Beautifully written.
Just when I think humanity has taken a left turn, her words bring it back.
Thanks Sally.
52
I haven't read all the comments here, but after reading some "reader's picks" I'm surprised no one had mentioned what I consider her best performance in "Steel Magnolias." I thought she was truly great in that role.
Here's hoping she gets some good scripts in the future. She'll do them well.
28
I really don't understand the need to tell the entire world ones most personal things. Should she have told her mother about the sexual abuse from her step-father? Absolutely! Too bad she felt she could not tell her far sooner. Should she share this with her 3 boys? Maybe, maybe not - that's a hard call to make. But the rest of the world? Who needs to know this? Is it so we will admire her more? Isn't admiring oneself enough? Clearly, not enough for Sally Field - we all still remember her '"You like me! You really like me!" moment.
As for her relationships with men...well, those should be kept private. I have no idea what her relationship with Burt Reynolds was like, nor do I care. But I do hate to see someone trashed when there is no way for that person to defend himself and when she knows it will be hurtful. Do we really need to know if he hurt her so now she's going to hurt him? No, we don't.
My son was either in her son Peter's class or one year behind him at Harvard School in LA. I saw Ms Field many times in the car pool line and at various school events. I assume she was a good mother - at least she provided this child with an excellent education.
Her instincts were right. Perhaps she needed to WRITE the book, but she should have pulled it from publication.
11
@India
The more people who come forward to reveal the abuse in their past, the easier it will be for others to resist when they are aassaulted.
And, btw, no one forced you to read this profile of Sally Field.
And we certainly have absolutely NO interest in your son or your opinion of her parenting skills.
13
@India I don't understand why Sally telling her story is an issue for you, unless you have issues that are not resolved yourself. Her stories are no different than than the millions of people who have no outlet or voice. Let hers ring.
38
@India Writing a memoir is therapeutic for oneself
16
A fine actress but her story, one of millions, would only be told on our immature culture of celebrity and fame. What of any use can come from reading it and it troubles me that celebrities cannot simple fade to black like everyone else must.
11
@Carry On
So you believe that abused children should just shut up and let the adult men do what they wish? Good to know.
39
@Carry On
There are many names I wish to call you for this untoward remark, but what use would it be for you to read them? I will simply let them fade to black - as is the color of my feelings toward you.
24
@Carry On If it bothers you to read it then don't.
11
Seems everyone always has different “recollections.”
5
We like you, Sally Fields. We really do!
29
Her title, "In Pieces", resonates well with anyone who does not experience the "self" as something homogenized. Her portrayal of a woman with multiple personalities in "Sybil" (1976) was a tour de force for a relatively young actress. I also especially liked the way she played the reporter in "Absence of Malice", a women who, in the end, lost face both professionally in journalism and humanly in love, and apologized in a manner that was way deeper than the words "I'm sorry" .
I am close to Sally Field's age and welcome her invitation to read "In Pieces".
43
@Athawwind wrote: "...in the end, [she] lost face both professionally in journalism and humanly in love, and apologized in a manner that was way deeper than the words "I'm sorry".
I'm glad Ms. Fields is an icon for you, as she was for me...the flying nun for a catholic altar boy was the coolest thing next to John F Kennedy. I might be exaggerating, but there was lots to love.
However, in reading your comment above, I couldn't help that you seem to imply she perhaps should also be personally recognized for a role played facing life's travails, as someone who commits offenses of the human kind which accumulate with time, but nevertheless finds a way to construct an apology far deeper than a simple and glib, "I'm sorry." I'm afraid some will say she followed an opposite strategy as an author.
A good deal of confessional material and so forth, that's what is under judgement. The Stepfather? Evil.
But Burt and Jimmy? What is "doesn't like parts of my personality." My wife didn't either, but she stayed with me, as I did with her.
Sally Fields really didn't find a way to say "I'm sorry" for past problems, but rather her emphasis seems to be in showing the inadequacy of others in fulfilling her needs, which may or may not be true, but as a strategy for writing, is by some people seen as unconvincing, perhaps self-serving as well.
2
As a genre, I’m tired of these abuse narratives. They’re purposefully exploited by publishers riding a cultural wave to titillate a readership insatiably hungry for the lurid. While I’m glad people no longer feel a need to suffer in silence and I’m truly sorry for Sally Field, what really do you want me to do with this?
14
@Anonymous
Apparently you can do nothing with this. So do nothing. Leave it to those who have something to gain.
41
@Anonymous
how about you speak out on behalf of victims of abuse whenever the subject comes up?
Being a child taken away from his or her parents, or a child being abused by his or her priest, or a man grabbing women by their genitals.
try it.
You'll feel better about yourself because you spoke up for someone who had a hard time finding his or her own voice.
38
It's a memoir. No one is being exploited.
16
Thank you Sally - for having the strength and courage to speak out!
50
Dear Ms. Fields,
You have no idea of how many people you will help with this book- the courage you will give them, the solace of knowing they are not alone, the self-forgiveness of the adult to the child who could do nothing.
But some of them will write you and thank you.
God Bless
92
Always liked Sally, but don't know how much of her, or any celebrity's, memoir actually happened as they say it did. And, in these sordid days, who knows how much of the accused "abuse" was just as she remembers it to be? So much of all of these books are done for the sensationalism factor, and let's face it, done to sell more books. At least some of all of them are greatly exaggerated, and maybe a lot of it is just plain fabrication. That's why they wait until most/all of the people in the book are dead. No lawsuits that way.
4
Unless you have first-hand evidence that Ms. Fields’ book is, as you put it, “plain fabrication” written “to sell more books,” how about keeping your mouth shut?
How dare you. She was THERE. You were not.
How dare you.
85
@richard conner - Sounds like you've never been sexually abused, assaulted or harassed. Lucky you. As a school social worker I dealt with so much sexual abuse of children that I had to leave the job. It was overwhelming. It happens ALL THE TIME.
184
@richard conner
After the priest scandals, Trump, the Michigan State doctor, Weinstein, Woody Allan and the Me Too movement why on earth would you question her story?
Get real.
138
She was my idol. I wrote to her and received a photo autographed. I never missed The Flying Nun. It’s sad but true, girls didn’t speak out, nor most children, during that time. We were so “well behaved “. It’s also sad to learn she didn’t have the most perfect life we all thought. I’ve enjoyed many of her movies, and admired the characters she played. Take care Sally. Tell your story for you because you need to.
70
Sally, you are a great actress of your time. I am going to read your book in English, but very hopefully to get one in Portuguese next future.
24
Like "Father Knows Best" and other family shows I watched growing up, I always thought life was especially good for the child actors. It is shocking and a real pain, a slug in the chest, when I hear it was not.
I look forward to reading this memoir for her whole life! This book may be the beginning of healing for her bad times. It was sheer cruelty (and more) that her stepdad knew he should be protecting her; and instead perversely, abused and betrayed both her and her mother. He severed them in such an evil way; the child must have felt cut off to telling her mother. He not only abused her but he obviously, emotionally separated her from her mother, or Sally would have felt free to tell her other protector, her mom.
29
To the negative commentators who also think they know what is a lie and what isn't:
Think about how complicated all humans are, think about dysfunction in your own family, think about your intimate relationships. Will others contradict your own recollections and feelings?
Now imagine you're a celebrity, in the public eye, reviewed, praised, criticized, a public persona.
People think they know you, they don't.
For Gods sake, this is a memoir. Do you know what a memoir is?
We don't know any celebrity, we only think we do, just as we can never fully know anyone.
On How Sally views Burt : why would that match your opinion?
Further, this interview was obviously after his death. However she recalls the relationship, you have to have a lot of love remaining in your heart, to care about hurting someone in a memoir. Memoir writing workshops are full of people wanting revenge through words. Her being unsure if the book should come out reinforces that she wrote this for herself. She needed to.
Finally, you either "get" the memoir genre or you don't. Just because you wouldn't tell your truth, doesn't mean Sally Field shouldn't. And, your either interested in her life as she sees it, or you're not.
Why are you getting miffed over a celebrity whose basically been quiet her entire life? Bravo Sally! Your "you really, really like me," takes on new meaning.
123
Sally Field has always done right by women in her films; now she does it in her writing. May her story add to all of us finding more peace as we learn how sadly common it is for men to use their power against women, against girls.
112
We kind of need to come to terms with the rampant sexual abuse that goes on in this country. It's pretty disgusting, and it's not just the Catholics, either, not by a long shot. They, at least, are trying to deal with it. Anybody else???
50
Yeah. So true. Me too.
17
Typical that so many men come here to comment this 71-year-old woman does not have the right to tell the story of her life, some of which involved incest and bad men. Some things viagra cannot fix.
251
Sally Field was dealt a hand, certainly not perfect but many have it worse without the outlet of talent and perseverance she had. She supported her family with grace and hard work. She's had ups and downs as most do, some worse, some better and getting it down on paper is both cathartic and interesting.
Ultimately she survived, has a lot to be proud of, what more can anyone ask of life? For her fans, an incredible body of work and who knows, maybe the best is ahead.
32
I am going to keep this really simple. I have always found Ms. Field to be one of the warmest and most likable celebrities. Knowing her story only makes her more so. I wish I could take away the pain of her childhood experience, but hopefully the book will help her with that :-)
86
I have looked up to Sally Field through her roles since I was a little kid watching the Flying Nun then later Sybil, Stay Hungry, Norma Ray and onward. As I would expect she has been able to take the braver side of self and reveal those skeletons from her closet that so many women in particular have had to endure over the years. Her bravery needs to be commended along with all of those who bring out their personal stories that will hopefully set examples and present a better future for those coming up behind them.
25
Now I see why Sally Field was so relatable. We are only a few years apart and came from very similar backgrounds. No one was allowed to speak about abuse in my family either. That kind of life never stops affecting you. I look forward to his book to read about all of what made her such a creative and powerful woman.
64
Between her and Olivia Newton John, a 13 year old boy in 1978 didn't stand a chance! Talk about puppy love!
11
A great actress. Looking forward to reading her book...
18
A fan since I was a kid and wanted to fly just like she did, I look forward to reading her book. Of course she has a voice — she had it all along — but I’m grateful she paused long enough to give it an airing.
She never disappoints in her work; I look forward to knowing a bit more about what made her tick all these years.
19
Just reading the first paragraph of this article makes me know Field's book is worthwhile.By her acknowledgement of being abused she will help thousands of other women who have been abused. Hopefully, also, she will prevent thousands of other young women from being abused by educating them about the "grooming" of abusers.....Thanks Sally!
68
I thank her for being such an inspiration in many of the roles she played on the screen.
It sounds like acting was a necessary outlet for Sally. I hope she has found peace; but if not, I hope she will find a good therapist.
7
This article is drearily written. I have always thought Sally Field was a bit too taken with herself. Working mothers all around work at jobs, juggle that and parenthood; most of them don't have the money to afford nannies and others to help, they do it all themselves, it feels false to hear a rich actress complain about it. Perhaps her relationship with Reynolds was real. But if you are as old as I am to remember, she faked for publicity purposes, a "relationship" with Davey Jones while he and she were married to others. So what made the Reynolds relationship real.
4
Because Burt said so too..."(She's) the one that got away..."
Why so cynical? Who cares if their relationship was real or not? It is called "entertainment," after all.
2
@Connie Beck
Why are you bitter about entertainers you don't even know - especially after 30+ years?
20
@Connie Beck, Boy are you a sour pooper. She did not complain about juggling family and career as far as I can tell. It was not uncommon especially for an actress, to be one picture away from failure. With kids to support that could be stressful, especially if you had spent your early years only acting.
And interesting you know so much ancient gossip, and of course you have known Sally and her family and friends for years and have first hand accounts so you must be an expert about her life and loves or fake loves.
I would love to read the many riveting and fascinating articles you must write. Humble me found this article very well written and quite moving, and far from dreary, so I applaud you forcing yourself to read through the whole thing. And on top of that to take the time to comment on a person you have no respect for and a badly written article. Oh and by the way, I am an actress and I do feel a bit qualified to say Ms. Field, is a brilliant, stunning actress, on stage and screen. Her great and rare talent is a wonderful gift for all.
11
I’m proud Sally was strong enough to complete this book detailing her abuse. Now the true healing of her heart can begin.
12
I have admired her for years and years. Sharing her story has taken tremendous courage. Thank you Sally Field and Kudos!
34
Pure coïncidence but last august I borrowed the DVD in my public library of the film "Norma Rae" to see it again of course, I had such an incredible memory in 1980 of your performance Ms Field it was unforgettable. I was 17 then and the rendering of your character had a real impact on me. Your name was engraved as "best actress" forever in my heart after that one. Such compassion and sadness I'm feeling at the thought of what happened to you.
29
Ron Leibman was also outstanding, as was the script and direction.
13
She is so personable and charming it is hard not to believe her. But, unless you have personal knowledge or there is a smoking gun or admission, it is very hard, if not impossible, to tell for sure what happened. Obviously, we all have biases and some people may just believe her b/c she is a woman or a celebrity or personable and others the opposite. I have heard enough people tell me things about the past that I know aren't true (unless my memory is wrong) or illogical, that I am very cynical. People often change things in their head to make themselves sound or feel better or less their fault. I'm not saying that this is the case here - but it is possible and I suppose I am writing about it b/c Jocko is dead and can't defend himself. Still, even if not completely true, she obviously was affected by something.
I have met women and some men who have told me they suffered sexual abuse, if not outright rape, mostly when I was younger and it would come up in conversations. It was a lot of people. I knew them so I believed them - or most of them. Some of them were devastated, but others said not so much - or at least they thought they had gotten past it. In any event, if the metoo movement doesn't self-destruct as a result of the overkill, which is perhaps inevitable, you have to hope it will make life better for everyone. I admit I'm cynical about that too.
2
Dear Sally Field,
I have always enjoyed your performances and you are one of my favorite actresses. I'm sorry that you had to suffer for so long. Thank you for sharing your experience. I hope your sharing brings you comfort in knowing that telling your story will help many others as well.
77
Talk about bridging the generations, as a 6th grader in 1967, attending a Catholic grade school I enjoyed watching sally Field as The Flying Nun. Currently, my 28 year old daughter's gmail profile photo is that of Sally Field as Gidget.
10
"You like me! You really like me!"
10
Did Ms. Fields look out for her younger sister? I sure hope so.
8
It’s worth noting that her abuser was her step-father - not related to Ms. Fields - but her younger sister was her half-sister, and I believe the child of her step-father and mother. Not that this excuses him from abusing his step-daughter or anyone else. Additionally, it is not a child’s responsibility to defend another child from the sexual abuse of an adult. To imply that it was is doing a disservice to children who are victims of abuse.
33
@Melissa H. Sally was an adult when the stepsister was still a young teen. She was also wealthy and powerful while the stepsister was still a child. She had an obligation because of these factors.
It looks like "love" may be a theme in these comments. I fell in love with Ms. Field (may I call you Sally?) when she first flew nunnishly and realize I feel the same way reading this article today. Congratulations Sally, for surviving and thriving. I look forward to reading your book and perhaps meeting you while on a long autograph line in a bookstore. I'd ask for a hug but after reading the article, perhaps not - a handshake, maybe?
10
I love Sally Field’s acting and her honesty in writing about the terror of sexual abuse in childhood. It was horrific. But then at times she lost me by playing the victim. Are all men THAT bad Sally? Jeez, where is the balance?
2
@Mike, here's a news flash for you----there are all too many men who do treat women badly, when they can get away with it. I doubt that you could easily find a woman who doesn't have a story to tell about her experience with some creep who doesn't know the meaning of consent. Well, it's a new day, and women like Ms. Field are finally standing up and saying, no more! And they are empowering more women to do likewise.
51
@Mike - Every woman I know has at least one story about a bad man - usually more than one. I'm always amazed that the good men always seem so surprised. Bad men are everywhere.
90
Wow, I can’t believe she is 14 in those photo booth shots. She looks so much younger. Heartbreaking to think what she had already endured.
149
My wife was sexually abused by her father, who abandoned the family of five when she was only six years old. Better off without him ! She has an underlying fear (understandably) from the trauma she endured, of being forced or abandoned. The abuse affected her ability to choose wisely in her relationships with men, however like Sally Field she worked hard and smart and has succeeded in life, in teaching an area of medicine benefiting thousands. She has spoken internationally. Yet she was part of the “do not tell” trap about her own abuse. She is amazing, yet she has suffered.
I wonder if in Sally’s book she will relate being helped by EMDR psychotherapy. Sally, if you have not, please look into this breakthrough therapy in treating Post Traumatic Stress. It would still benefit you significantly and then you would promote this to help so many others.
Read the book outlining the breakthrough therapy www.amazon.com/Movement-Desensitization-Reprocessing-Therapy-Third/dp/14...
www.emdr.com Thank you Francine Shapiro
Thank you Sally. I am now an even bigger fan of yours ….
38
I look forward to reading this sweet actor's painful childhood, young adulthood challenges and other recollections in her memoir. I always felt strong kinship to her portrayals of activist characters like NORMA RAE in the films of the 60's and 70's. She is a sweet, gentle person with a core of strength, I thought at the time. Maybe this is what she is now about to reveal?
34
In 1984, a couple of years after Sally Field and Burt Reynolds ended their relationship, Burt broke his jaw while filming City Heat with Clint Eastwood. Reynolds experienced severe mandibular joint pain and lost a lot of weight. Rumours circulated that he had contracted AIDS at a time when such stories could end careers. Producers chose not to hire him and he made few films.
Sally Field gave an interview in 1986, in which she was very critical of Reynolds. She was asked about the AIDS rumours. She could easily have denied them, but chose not to, which only made the "Does Burt Have AIDS?" story bigger. This devastated Reynolds and further damaged his career and finances.
Fields and Reynolds may not have had a happy ending together, but she didn't have to kick him when he was already down. I wonder how she will describe these events in her book.
13
When a woman owns her choices it often scares people. Good for Sally Fields!
149
Sally Fields is a continual dose of joy to the world.
79
Ms. Field has always been one of my favorite and what I consider, under appreciated and under rated actors of our time. She is as beautiful as she is bold. I am really looking forward to reading her book. Bravo for finding your voice and using it!
71
I know Sally Field's work. One time I was watching one of her movies where she played a patient in a hospital setting. The nurse told her she needed to walk out of this situation, or you are going to die in here. She walked out. Never forgot it, and appreciated the performance all my life.
31
I have nothing but respect for Ms. Field. Respect for the woman and artist, and the strength of character she has always shown. I grew up watching her grow from the Gidget and The Flying Nun days into a powerful and deeply nuanced actress. I look forward to reading her book, and much like Ms. Field, there are far too many of us that have a story of abuse to tell. I am cautiously optimistic that there is and will continue to be a sea change where abusers are no longer calling the shots.
203
While I love and admire Ms. Field, I find her comments regarding Mr. Reynolds to be somewhat strange. She says that she is "glad that he wasn’t going to read it, he wasn’t going to be asked about it, and he wasn’t going to have to defend himself or lash out, which he probably would have. I did not want to hurt him any further.” But the book is due out this month and Reynolds only died just recently. She could not have known that he would not have lived to read her comments and, by her own admission, be hurt.
20
@Lou
Quite simple really. She was going to publish the book anyway. His passing prior to the release date avoided the hurt it may have caused him, which she was relieved to see happen.
3
Thank you for this beautifully-written interview. I never saw "The Flying Nun," but was awe-struck by "Norma Rae." I thought Sally as Norma Rae was feisty and strong and fighting for something larger than herself, which sounds an awful lot like Sally. And just thinking about her role as the mother of the doomed Shelby in "Steel Magnolias" makes me cry. Again, she was feisty and strong and fighting for something larger than herself. I look forward to reading Sally's autobiography, and plan to have some tissues nearby!
26
Another woman speaks out about the sexual abuse she experienced as a girl and adolescent in her own home.. As seems to be so typical, she is revealing abuse that happened decades ago. When will we have a culture that encourages and supports girls and women to feel they are safe if they expose these predators when the abuse is happening? Probably never. As long as women experience economic insecurity they will be at the mercy of men who hold the purse string and sadly, so will the female children in these abusive households.
158
And if they are encouraged to complain about the abuse when it is happening, the abusers can be prosecuted at that time. In that way, abusers are prevented from abusing again, and statutes of limitations won't prevent them from being prosecuted years after the abuse.
16
“Outrage has to come first and it can’t just be quieted and go away.”
I agree. Sadly us survivors have only recently been allowed to even express our outrage... but we are still told eventually to be quiet and go away.
Thank you to heros like Sally for saying what so many of us can’t. Thank you.
86
There will be those that pillory Ms. Fields for her truth, but I'm glad she's told it. It will read like textbook manipulation and abuse by men from beginning to end, from step-dad to Burt Reynolds and the entire movie/TV industry. I don't know how any woman survives in this world, honestly. I don't know how I have, sometimes. Thank you, Sally. Keep swinging.
120
Brava, Sally Field! My family also refused to discuss what was really going on in our complicated, dysfunctional, sad lives and I ended up married an abusive man, about whom I remained silent for years, until I finally began to tell the truth to a best friend. Telling the truth is the gateway to effecting the changes needed and beginning the journey to wellness. I am so glad Sally found the courage and determination to share the personal and painful details of what occurred and I am quite sure the telling will inspire other women to ponder their own lives and any secrets haunting them. As more and more women report abuse, it becomes harder and harder for men to continue to take advantage of women in general. Courage, grace, and honesty and marvelous gifts and Sally is illustrating ways to honor and use those gifts.
193
Ms. Field is many people, and a number of them are impressive. When I saw her portrayal of Mary Todd Lincoln, I thought to myself that at least half of that fierce and vulnerable performance must be Ms. Field herself. We just don't see the fiercer one taken out much, and I wish we did.
30
Silence kills. I'm glad she was able to speak up.
207
Dear Ms. Field,
You have shared your art with us, to our benefit. Now you have shared part of your story.
Thank you for working to find your voice. It can't have been easy.
137
Wow! Had no idea this was going on in her life. She is the one star that I thought she was the same person, on and off the screen. Amazing that she could have such a successful career with such distractions.
3
Sally Field is truly an American treasure.
186
So interesting to find out how many celebrities who have been abused as children are motivated to present unreal, idealized images for the public to emulate.
13
Dearworthy Ms Fields, Thank you from all of us who cannot share our outrage, remaining silent for all the reason you ponder. Your voice is our voice, so many more than most would ever believe. So love you did want Mr Reynolds to suffer a truth because of your love and care for the ties the bind. That is an act of heroism and of so human! Thank you for your courage and grace.
37
Dearworthy Ms Fields, Thank you from all of us who cannot share our outrage, remaining silent for all the reason you ponder. Your voice is our voice, so many more than most would ever believe. So love your did not wish Mr Reynolds to suffer a truth because of your love and care for the ties the bind. That is an act of heroism and so human! Thank you for your courage and grace.
22
Bravo Sally Field for sharing your truth. Can’t wait to read what I expect will be something many, many women will relate to and appreciate.
63
from william wilson dallas texas . . . just a word to say what a life and how strong she is . . . she makes me recall which i do almost daily now as we are getting on, is ms. fields'role in norma rae . . . my relatives came from decatur county tennessee and everyone worked in textiile factories for next to nothing . . . "slant and slant" and "decatürville sportwear" to name but two and i hope i am not being too truthful here, but they got out as did my mother who could sew anything as a result of that life. ms. field nailed that life. thanks for never letting me ever forget where they came from. really . . . william wilson dallas press club 1981
90
Look forward to book. Have always been a fan of Fields. She was incredible (and unsung) in the recent production of The Glass Menagerie on Bway.
But need the Times turn every memoir and story featuring a woman into a #metoo moment (here, by a male reporter for goodness sakes)? It's reductive and narrow, boiling down every bad relationship or interpersonal conflict to abuse of male power and female victimhood. I find it condescending and patronizing.
8
@sansacro Maybe when the abuse stops happening the Times should stop writing about it?
8
@sansacro: Sorry for the inconvenience to your comfort level finding out about so much #Metoo-oriented reportage. You ought to try living with the aftermath of having been sexually abused as a female child or as an adult woman.
22
@sansacro Yet most of the women in this country can relate to her experiences of abuse and mistreatment by men and in the home and workplace.
So, did the Times turn her memoir into a condescending story, or did the men who held the reins in her life and career?
17
Kudos to Ms Field, and admiration for this years long work. She looks lovely on the cover of her book. I hope the end piece has a current picture of her, there are probably many photos in the book spanning her life and career...
16
Don’t apologize for the cards you’ve been dealt or the path you’ve chosen. In the end, our lives are informed and enriched when we read of others in whose stories we see our own experiences and from which we can draw parallels. As to whether you have a voice or not...well, as has been said before, what others think is frankly none of your concern!
69
Ouf, she seems fine. I am 57, so I remember her first and foremost for « the Flying Nun ». A fine woman, and I am sure everything is either true, or at least as true as she remembers it. Which is to say, very much.
2
I love you, Sally Field. For years I showed your greatest film, Norma Rae, to my high school social studies classes. I wanted those girls, especially, to see a woman’s life. The good, the bad, and the ugly and triumph at the end. I suffered sexual abuse, too, as a child but never have had anyone truly accept me with that damage. It is frightening to tell. They come after you. I understand why you waited so long. When I write my book, can I send you the manuscript?
226