Why this constant reference to Mr. Romney tying his dog on the roof of his vehicle? It is not funny. He should be charged with animal abuse.
8
Gail thanks for pointing out an Obama appointee. Of coarse now this appointee might as well start packing. Again thanks for the outing.
As to the Mitt running for election again`st a puppy beater? A puppy beater would seem like an action figure next to Mitt the card board cut out and definitely capable of winning a debate with the Mitt.
8
Gail, you really got me thinking about buttons. I too have buttons.
My favorite button is the mute button. It really works well. Too bad it doesn’t work on everything. Believe me, I have tried.
I also like the buttons on my pants but here I only like one button. I have a pair of button down jeans and frankly, that’s too many buttons especially if your in a rush.
I also wear button down shirts. Now that’s a lot of buttons to me but the only ones I mind are the ones on the sleeves. I have such a hard time with those.
My mom had a big tin can full of buttons. My wife doesn’t sew so no button tin.
I never know what to do with the extra buttons that come with a new shirt or suit. I know that I saved them but I can never remember where. Note to self, get a button tin.
My cars as of late all have start buttons which is kind of cool but leaves me no practical place to put my car keys.
When I was a young kid, a few aunts told me I was as cute as a button. I just took it. Now I realize they must have been crazy. Comparing pictures of myself back then to all the buttons I know of, I simply can’t see a similarity.
My wife has a hot button. I try to never press it but things happen. I have learned to say sorry.
48
"a far-right puppy beater, who lives in a cabin surrounded by machine-gun turrets...." Laughed and laughed. Thanks Gail for some much needed comedy relief in this insane Punch and Judy show going on between Trump and North Korea.
16
Mine is bigger than yours. Geeeze. Why is more discussion or analysis required? This is the rant of a narcissistic, stupid 11 year old.
If this is the best America can do for a leader, I'm embarrassed for us.
13
Simply by making that (pathetic, Freudian) statement Trump has yet again caused psychological harm to probably millions of U.S. citizens, in breach of his oath of office. We know he said it on random impulse but for the sake of form I'll ask, what is the greater good that Trump calculated would follow, and therefore justify, this particular stress bomb that he has dropped on Americans? [Yes: crickets.] I'm sick of this buffoon actively making me miserable. With other presidents whom I abhorred on policy grounds at least I was able to get through most days without acute, president-induced angst. I wish the Constitution provided a way for us to boot this demonic dotard by referendum.
10
Don't vote for Mitt thinking (if he runs) that he will be a better choice than any generic Democrat. The generic Democrat is the country's better choice. In every contest in every state from dogcatcher to congress critter, vote Democratic so we can jumpstart our country again.
18
Would President Obama oblige Stephen Cobert from last night and save us from these crazy stupid morans.
2
I tried to smile at this well written piece, but I could not do so.
This unlearned reality show, book loathing man is leader of our country!
Its tough to laugh at the destruction of one's own country by some anti intellectual plutocrat, and the coarse charade of Republicans, corrupt sycophants, who care nothing about the attacks on the very soul of our country.
I watched Fox News during the holidays, and its astonishing they have not changed their name to Trump TV. It was a barrage of lies, an array of state run TV type commentary, and gross misrepresentations. Yet it is the most watched network in our country.
What a sad mess. This is not democracy. A Russian elected president was not within the imagination, I am sure, of our Founding Fathers.
14
Trump is on the emotional and sexual level of 12 year old boys in the movie, "Stand by Me" comparing his "button" with Kim's.
6
Wondering if that "aide with a briefcase" can run faster farther than old fat Trump! It would be the appropriate response to, "I've had it! Gimme that thing!"
8
Yup: bring on Mitt! Unfortunately, will he be too late, as the integrity of the presidency disappears in this White House jungle?
Even without the top-Banannon, Trump lives in a banana republic of the mind.
How long will it take for Congress to realize they have become part of the whole rotten, tainted bunch?
How long will it take for the laughable monkeys in the cabinet and the west wing, to shake out of the tree this self-serving, incompetent, nasty, and delusional president?
Shame on those with the power to stop Trump! Is your patriotism so dead?
5
Wait, a column that kinda features Mitt Romney... with no reference to the dog on the roof of the car? I felt empty at the end of the column. Perhaps next time.
2
Thank you, Ms. Collins, for a wonderful laugh. ( laughs have been scarce since...November 2016)
New York Times, please consider replacing Maureen "I still hate Clinton" Dowd with Gail Collins as the lead "Op-Ed by A Women." Ms. Dowd has been tired and tiresome for a long while, while Ms. Collins is bright and fresh.
Maybe even two women columnists? ( it is the 21st century....)
9
In another bit of good news for Trump, I hear they have decent barbers in prison.
9
Perhaps a guy you invited into your white house inner circle---and never once questioned why he was sitting on some couch at every meeting in every single office--- writes a big time book that asserts you might be fairly demented, and your staff totally compromised----as well as ineptly ineffective----then claims to have actual audio tapes of most of your staff--- don't prove it accurate to millions of us by so foolishly sending out an inept and depressed white house press secretary who ends up ensuring every single person in America can't wait to get that book--and devour it!!
2
Ugh - Trump sure has a bigger butt-on than Kim Jong Un and the Republicans are licking it with gusto...
6
Thank you, Gail. Your last line made me laugh, and we all need a laugh at times like this. Geez, could it get any crazier? (Don't answer that.)
3
It's time for another session of toadyism, led by Pence and Hatch.
4
Romney does look far better than he ever has before.
Let us not forget, though, he was willing to work with #45.
9
I'm surprised he didn't say, "Mine's bigger than yours, and mine can shoot further, too."
The allusion to the allegedly small size of Asian, ahem, manly parts was pretty obvious, as was his need to make claims about his own. I guess we can expect to go on hearing more of the same. I'm just afraid he may feel the need to prove it.
2
I think Trump should challenge Kim Jong Il to a duel and we should all pray hard that they tie.
5
It is beginning to appear the R's are going to lose their majorities in the house and senate. I suggest that rather than use that majority to push for impeachment, they trade that option for a Republican promise to help get rid of the Electoral College. Trump can finish his term a congress determined to make him a "one term president". Where have I heard that before? Just as Obama was unable to get any important legislation through congress after he lost his majority, Trump will also be so emasculated. Also, leaving Trump in office will be worse for the R's than having 2 years of Pense to perhaps patch things up.
2
We worry about Twitter while:
Trump just got rid of all regulations for off shore drilling.
Sessions has vowed that the feds will go after those who use marijuana.
Time to stop writing about tweets and look at how our country and the world are being decimated.
10
Romney is still a true red republican who believes government should not offer any service to its citizens. He praised teump's choice of Betsy DeVos for secretary of education. She is a champion of privatizing and profitizing public education with a good dose of religious indoctrination added. Romney like trump did not want disclose his tazes but finally was forced into it. That won't happen again. As a corporatist he will do nothing to gelp the working people.
9
We can only hope that his hands are too small to operate such a big button.
5
Isn't it nice that Mitt the clueless has five "homes" so that he can run for office all over the place. His compound on Lake Winnipesaukee in NH alone demonstrates on how difficult it is for this silver spoon politician to relate to real people.
6
Shame on congress for doing NOTHING.
3
Only solution to this problem is November 2018. let us get rid of these spineless repubs. The dealing with this big button guy is easy.
6
Thank you Gail for the big yuks . Total fantasyland between these two looneys ; and we have to laugh at this absurd but scary reality. Vonnegut could have penned this reality show .
3
as usual, one of the best columnists in the business. Good to smile when all is crashing around us!!
9
Call me stunned.
Gail has written a column about (well, partially about) Mitt Romney, without mentioning the time he put the dog carrier on the roof of the car.
I still don't like Mitt, but obviously it's a new day in America
4
Mock Mr. Trump if you must, but when Mr. Obama was president. Hurricane Sandy hit the East Coast, and he did NOTHING to stop it.
9
Here’s for Trump and Kim - the higher the pedestal, the bigger the fall.
2
two whinny little boys in the sandbox trying to outdo each other.
except that this is the real world and the potential for world wide annihilation is on the edge here.
frightening !!!
4
Empty boasts is what both are best at. In fact, they really could be buddies.
3
It is amazing how events change our opinions. George Bush Jr. Mitt Romney all looking like sane reasonable middle of the road guys. Trump has certainly opened up the political field.
7
Mitt Romney is a worn-out, hypocritical, not-too-bright, rich Republican politician who still dreams of being president. It's difficult to blame him for getting his hopes up: After all, look at the current incumbent - a demented, totally unfit narcissist who can't spell, read, or be expected to say anything sensible and consistent even a small fraction of the time. In comparison with Trump's ignorance, folly, and mental and emotional limitations and sickness, Romney is a shining example of traditional incompetence and the feelings of entitlement which come with being George Romney's son. Perhaps he even expects his path will be made easier if Mueller's investigation clears the way by removing Trump and Pence from contention. His foresight doesn't extend to considering that Trump could well plunge the country into a severe recession through his policies when this recovery comes to an end as it will; and/or conflict with his silly posturing and threats. Neither outcome is good for Republican prospects in the next presidential election.
4
As I recall trump already bragged about his "big hand" during the primary debates. What a horrible little man we have in the WH now.
6
Mitt Romney is the guy who stood in front of the cameras and call Donald Trump all kinds of despicable names. We applauded for a while, but then he proceeded to accept a private dinner with him when he thought that he might be in line for a top cabinet job (he was rumored for Secretary of State). Trump just wanted to take him to the woodshed, and Romney dutifully bent over.
The man looks and talks a good part, but he has no spine. We have enough of them already in Congress.
18
This situation is way beyond humor or even irony. Survivors (if any) will regard it as worse than a Twilight Zone episode in history. It's a horror story.
3
Gail, you made me laugh on this miserable cold blustery day in NE. It is sad what is happening but using humor to describe the mess we are in with the Troll in charge, helps us cope. Keep writing.
5
All the Progressives - howling - about Trump's latest "Button" tweet.
While they were focused on Tweets, Trump has been busy transforming the federal courts and eradicating the Progressive abuses of the past 8 years.
Useful idiots, are useful.
1
Wishful thinking... Votes will count... Pendulums swing...
Gail thank God you're around to help us see reality. Perhaps now the tide is finally shifting and we can really laugh again. We do really need an NYT photo comparison of haircuts!
5
How do you respond to a lunatic that threatens you. Trump's response was Ok. In fact, he should call a meeting of China, Russia, and the surrounding nation's ambassador and give them a list of sanctions that includes transfer of food that would go beyond water, bread and milk and the stuff eaten by the poor in North Korea so the elite know what it is like after a nuke goes off.
USA used nuclear bombs on Japan and to this day it justifies them. Japan has never had nuclear weapons. But N. Korea has nuclear weapons and missiles that it threatens to use, which is an act of war.
OK. How about if we lock Mr. Trump up in his own Trump Tower and give him a big red button to push anytime he feels the need. Also, take away his real Twitter ability and come up with a fake one that seems to be working, but goes nowhere. He would be happy, Kim Jun Un,and the rest of us could just get on with our lives and the government would be able to function without all this foolish distraction.
Seriously, I think Mr. Trump has some very, very serious medical problems. Some have been discussed at length in the media. Some, I hope will be dealt with at his physical next week. While I doubt that my expectations will be determined, I hope there will be evidence enough to caution the Cabinet and Congress about his ability to continue serving as POTUS. His speech, his strange behavior and constant repetition of phrases and his stated desire to eat sweets all lean to an old folks diagnosis that none of us over 70 ever want to get. However, it must be taken seriously and the subsequent removal of Mr. Trump from office must be considered.
6
So, you want to leave Kim Jon Un (a dictator who's developing nuclear weapons, wants to take over South Korea, and has absolute power over his country, missiles, and army) alone? That sounds like a very bad idea for everybody in South Korea, America, and anywhere else random nukes can fly.
Shhh! Don't publicize that the FAA is run by an Obama appointee! Dang, if Trump finds out, he's as good as fired.
18
I picked up on this slip as well. Darn you Gail!
2
Oh, Gail! I'm so glad to be able to laugh at the idiocy, though I was hoping to read another snarky reference to the dog on the roof of the car. Can I hope that will be coming soon?
4
She's beaten that trope to death. Let it go.
3
I'm just pleased as Punch to know that my country has the first Presidential limo ever from which, at every minor intersection, approximately 213 clowns spill out, run around the limo, whip out rags and of course dipsticks, and pretend frantically to be servicing the thing.
And then pile back in, for the 73 clown shoe distance before the next intersection.
4
"Next there will be a comparison of body parts." Ms. Collins, there already has! The 'button' is a metaphor.
5
My thought exactly.
I'm saddened that Gail Collins wrote a column about Mitt Romney that did not include any mention of the cantrip with the dog strapped to the top.
4
I'm thrilled. She'd beaten that hound to death.
2
Gail nicely shows that Trump and Kim are cut from the same badly flawed cloth. Ironic that Trump mocks those flaws in Kim but neither he nor his adulating followers recognize the same flaws in himself.
10
A far-right puppy beater with gun turrets surrounding his cabin would never be elected here. We love puppies!
3
With so much navel gazing, perhaps they are talking about their belly buttons!
4
Next thing you know they'll be comparing belly buttons.
1
Darn, Gail. No mention of Seamus? Every column discussing Romney deserves a Seamus mention.
3
Size has always been a fixation with Trump given his insecurity.
6
I fully understand how serious and worrisome ths is, but my first thought when I saw the accompanying photo was my gosh that man needs a haircut. What a bedraggled looking specimen.
4
Splendid column. Only one thing is wrong.
Trump does have a nuclear button. It's the same Trump button that he uses to order up daily Colas. His staff just switches up the labels. Imagine, one day he grows irate over the latest mock from Kim Jong-un and presses the button, but gets a butler with a fizzy drink instead. Both, after all, satisfy his 6-year-old urges. By the time his caffeine-boost-in-a-can arrives, of course, his fish-net brain has already forgotten about the bomb and he goes on with his day. Bombs, buttons, it's all boy-toys. Who knows how many bombings Trump has ordered, how many wars he has started, but certainly enough to evaporate the planet. He keeps slurping that sugary cola every day.
I wonder what Kim gets with his button. When you get down to brass tacks, Kim is a God. Trump is just a washed out TV actor.
4
I started with, button, button, button, who has the bigger button? Next: In the snow covered mountains of South Korea a new winter sport, Red Rover. North Korea vs. the USA, Team Captain Kim behind in points makes a bold decision against the surging USA. Red rover, red rover send Donnie right over...Team USA confers for a moment then decides...Yeah, they can have him. We have a deep bench. Next: Nuclear Whiplash, a new game to winter sports, around a central point on freshly groomed ice, all the world's nuclear powers circle at faster and faster speeds. The rules are, there aren't any. the last three left standing on the ice get to keep their nukes and the medals...RAW.
3
Oh hey, we have a Democrat in Alabama now. Why can't Hatch be replaced by a nice moderate Democrat?
I believe in miracles, having witnessed one in the White House ( I truly thought it would take a "Miracle" to elect him) and now another miracle in Alabama. One just never knows. Let's get behind that thought.
6
I think you have Romney all wrong. He stands up to Trump now because there is no political cost for him to do so. However if her were to attain actual power again, I assume he would fall in line like the rest of the GOP.
20
Very, very amusing.
I am looking forward to
your next column
about THE BOOK...
Ivanka's Presidential
aspirations, the on & off
Trump/Bannon bromance,
Bannon's tun for office,
the McDonald's feasts in bed,
the 17 tweets, whose what is bigger....
So much to cover.
This is catnip for y'all.
7
President Trump is scheduled for a medical examination at Walter Reed in a few days time.
Will that examination include a careful assessment of his incessant lying, his Tweeting habits, his constant insulting of President Obama and Mrs. Clinton, his refusal to release his tax forms, his inability to distinguish fact from fantasy when it comes to assessing his achievements as President, his frequent firing of staff, his strange television viewing habits, his aversion to reading, his sometimes odd behavior around women, his tendency to bully minorities and make wild claims about his success as a businessman?
Psychological problems -- even serious ones -- can sometimes be overcome by small, simple and temporary changes in one’s life style. Fewer Big Macs, a cup of hot chocolate at bedtime, less time spent outdoors on the golf course in the hot sun, a cutback in the number of his exhausting vacations and airplane trips, a few meetings with a therapist, maybe even a prescription for Viagra.
He is our President. We owe him the highest standard of care.
11
it would be more merciful and better for the country for Pemce and the cabinet to invoke the 25th Amendment and remove Trump from power. Then he could go back to New York and be a real estate grifter who does no work.
4
Sorry! That means "President Pence", maybe the only name on the Oval Office desk scarier than Trump, Ryan, McConnell, Grassley... Oh never mind.
3
A TV soap opera with consequence.
5
'Next there'll be a comparison of body parts.' Too late. Where have you been for the last couple years?
4
honestly, now is not the time for SNL humor.
2
When I was kid in the 1960s, we had to practice nuclear drills in class. We ducked and hid under our wooden desks or lined up against the interior halls, squatted and put our arms over our heads. Hilarious, but it worked - it sent the fear into us. I was just 6 during the Cuban Missile Crisis. But kids pick up and absorb events around them (even as they are today). Until my 20s, I had this slight sense of dread that we would not survive a coming nuclear war.
Even after I squared up with and disposed of that, I never Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb. I had to see Dr. Strangelove a couple of times before I realized it was OK to laugh.
But this is not comedy. It is no longer OK to laugh. Still, Trump will undoubtedly come back at some point and say he was joking. Sick joke, sick man.
11
I had an ancestor in Nauvoo. Apparently he joined the Mormons and decided to contribute his War of 1812 land grant to their cause. Like Joseph Smith, he died.
Anyone who thinks Mormons can be trusted with any governmental function -- especially one that Smith's, like Trump's, involved control of the state military, is in serious denial of reality.
9
You're painting with an awfully broad brush.
Thank you Ms. Collins for bringing such laughter into our household today. I just loved this piece. Hilarious!
2
The United States was created as a secular nation by founders who were products of the Age of Reason and Enlightment. Aren’t we long overdue for a president who doesn’t believe in Mother Goose? The evangelicals gave us Trump.
QED.
13
Oh no! Ms. Collins, don't tell me you are letting go of the Mitt-related "dog on the roof of the car" meme!?
5
Mitt Romney will not save us. He is a panderer. I used to have respect for him due to his time as governor of Massachusetts, but in retrospect I realize he acted as a liberal Republican because he led a liberal state. He turned red as a beet when he ran for president. And remember the cozy lunch he had with Trump when he thought he was in the running for Secretary of State? No, once he's in the Senate he will do whatever is necessary to take care of Mitt.
19
It's pretty sad when the point of reference for competency and morals has shifted to such a degree that all we ask is that future candidates be better than Trump. How high a bar is that? Who doesn't look sane next to Trump?
Romney is no model of virtue, not then and not now. He'd be singing a different tune if he was defending his seat and had to bow down and do what his big donors wanted him to do. The GOP is not interested in the welfare of the average American, and neither is Romney.
14
I think it's a sign of true despair when you can't even get any joy from a Gail Collins column.
6
This is a comparison of body parts.
5
This reflects the deep mental illness of the man which may well get worse in the next three years as his team (and / or family) is totally unable to control him, and because the party that elected him has decided to follow him blindly.
All this would be quite sad and very churlish if the N. Korea issue didn’t take us back to the worst period of the Cold War during which both superpowers raced for arms and developed atom bomb arsenals with the potential to destroy the planet several times.
From this point of view the stupid and childish claim "my button is bigger than yours" echoes the foreign policy of the 50's which was essentially based on the "I have more power to destroy the planet than you have” type of argument.
But there is a difference between then and now and that’s where things become very dangerous : the superpower is led by a man who is clearly insane and may become crazier; the other side is a small country with a despicable tyran who has only one card on his hand and who plays it well. Kim is horrendous but cannot but stick to his policy for two reasons : one, being anti-american is the way of being popular there; two, he is perfectly aware that if he fails his fate will be the same as Sadam Hussein and Khadafi. He has nothing to loose.
This is a most dangerous combination because rationality is slowly evading the whole issue and nobody can surmise what may happen next.
7
What? No comment about Mitt’s dog on the roof of his car? Saving it for next time I suppose.
3
Gail--no mention of the dog in the crate strapped to the roof of the car? I'm disappointed in you.
I will never get that image out of my head and the day I read that was the day I decided Mittens was dead to me.
2
Maybe the Bundy re-trial will be over by then and Bannon can put him up against Romney, you know--Roy Moore all over again!
2
Ms. Collins:
What about the Irish setter he strapped down on the roof of his car? I was waiting and waiting...then nothing. You're not getting soft, are you?
3
Seamus redux!
I worry about Trump having all his marbles, let alone a red button on his desk (which doesn't exist, thank goodness). Even when he's not invited to the table, as in the proposed talks between North and South Korea, he has to butt in to get attention.
All in all, this does make Romney look good. Fortunately, if he runs and supposedly wins, he is not taking a Senate seat that is likely to turn blue.
I never thought I'd say this, but at least when Trump is tweeting some idiotic remark or another, he's not dreaming up a new way to destroy America, though he is working against American interests.
1
Next up: "my covfefe is bigger and better than your covfefe."
9
Three years from now when Trump has thoroughly angered and disgusted nearly every Republican, and every American in the country Mitt might be a sure bet nominee. And be a formidable opponent.
We need to think deep on our strategies for November2018 and 2020. So far our elected Democratic leaders are mostly AWOL. And it seems the press is not interested in what Democrats say and do these days. What's up with that?
5
Trump would never consent to comparing hand size. He is very sensitive about his hand size.
4
President Trump was just joking around. Not only do liberal Democrats lack common sense, they also lack a sense of humor!
Trump's sense of humor has frequently seemed to be deficient. Perhaps that is the problem?
5
No, Mr. Murray, It is Mr. Trump who has no sense of humor. Have you ever, ever heard him make a real joke? Or laugh at himself? Or laugh at a joke about himself? Or any other joke? No, his jokes are very, very cruel - if they really are jokes. Sad, very, very sad.
By the way, my sense of humor is well intact. Thank heavens for Trevor Noah, Stephen Colbert, Samantha Bee, and my friends and relatives who still can see some humor in this very, very grim morality play.
4
We are living in a Kurt Vonnegut novel now. We may die in one.
4
Mitt, of course. We would welcome him in Canada too, if only he would return - not with Seamus strapped on his car roof - but with a similar creature this time named Donald.
AG
Calgary, Canada
4
Excellent. Anyone out there know how engineer that one? Bannon? Are you ready to step in and really help?
Perhaps the staff of both Kim and Trump mounted "Easy" buttons on their desks and told them that this is their nuclear launch button. They didn't get the joke.
4
I was a Massachusetts resident when Mitt was governor. He was a moderate, and a good governor. Then, he ran for President and decided that he was Ronald Reagan reincarnated, and became another Massachusetts losing Presidential candidate. We have a few to choose from in recent memory: 1. Ted, who should never have run against Jimmy Carter. 2. Mike Dukakis, who lost to Lee Atwater. 3. John Kerry, who lost to himself. 4. Mitt, who also lost to himself.
It's almost like the "curse of the Bambino" with the Red Sox. There is some kind of curse of JFK, or curse of Ted, or of JFK, or something going on here. Or, it's just that Massachusetts liberals can only get elected in an ultra liberal state, but not nationally, but Mitt was not a liberal, so it can't be that alone. Elizabeth Warren must be wondering about this right now.
So now maybe Mitt will try it again as a resident of Utah. Interestingly, when he was running for Massachusetts Governor, the Massachusetts Democrats spent something like $50,000 trying to prove that Mitt was a resident of Utah, because he spent so much time there dealing with the Olympics. They failed of course. So now he's running as a resident of Utah.
3
I would like to give both Mr. Trump and Mr. Kim a big red button for their desks. They can have it in any diameter and height they like. It will be a button just like the one you find in a server room, you know, the one that shuts off the electricity and engages the fire extinguisher system.
3
Gail, how did you not get the Seamus on the roof story into this piece? I thought for sure we were headed this way when you brought up a "far right puppy beater."
2
Just a reminder that Romney was the guy who put the family pet in the roof of the car for a trip to Canada. When the dog inevitably vomited, the family stopped at a car wash, hosed the dog down, and returned the beloved companion to the car roof. Maybe he didnt beat his dog, but there was a certain lack of empathy shared by the whole Romney family. Next, all the people of Utah will be on the roof of Romney's government sponsored limo.
7
It WAS a comparison of body parts. In parts of Manhattan,"Button" is just a polite euphemism used instead of, say, "Johnson".
4
This is ALREADY a conversation about body parts. Trump needs to be removed. I'm shocked that Pence has not convened the cabinet to invoke the 25th amendment. Unless there is dirt on Pence that is holding him back.
5
Pence is lawyered up and keeping a low profile hoping that no one will notice that he's up to his neck in the Russian debacle.
6
If anyone had told me, ten years ago, that we would have a dysfunctional president whose assistance by a foreign enemy helped him win with a minority of voters, and whose party shielded him by ignoring the evidence of malfeasance and even treason in order to accomplish their goals of giving tax breaks to their donors and cutting benefits for the middle class, I'd have said no, that has to be some other nation, some country without our laws and ideals. Now it seems that the nightmare is true, and we have to wake up the Republicans and the Trump-dazed voters, and sweep away the dangerous charlatans.
17
Right-oriented businesspeople are used to dealing with brinksmanship on a daily basis, and this little nuclear spat between boys is just something they and the entire plutocracy is willing to put up with.
Sorry, but Leonhardt's idea of building uncomfortable alliances with right of center businesspeople is what caused this problem in the first place. That's the Clinton solution that brought us to this point. It's totally the wrong approach.
Build the alliances with the Christians, yes, but not businesspeople that pretend to be Christians.
The voters you're after might be willing to walk those right-oriented businesspeople right to the brink until THEY blink this time. We're not going to blink out here despite our nightmares.
1
Mitt Romney really looks good. At least he has a head of real, brunette hair on his head unlike Trump's coiffed, sometimes orange, sometimes yellow, funny looking wisps on his bald pate. But at 73 Mitt will still be a sight for sore eyes. Also reassuring is the fact that there is gray matter inside the skull. Now if only he would stop flip-flopping. Even that seems acceptable when you are being bombarded by vitreous, vicious lies every two minutes where Trump flip-flops on his own flip-flops.
3
Great column. Watching WH briefing right now and the Huckabee girl repeated that the president wants to make sure that information is correct before pushing it out. She says this daily and I wait for it because it's my biggest laugh of the day. No sense of irony in that WH.
I agree that Mitt is looking pretty good at this point. The Freedom Caucus boys will hate him as he sucks up all the air on media outlets (except for Fox). As a liberal Michigander, I still appreciated when he said he missed the Michigan trees. So have I when I lived in other states. He will be a breath of fresh air among the stale Republicans in Congress.
Go Mitt! I am looking forward to more dog-on-the roof references in the coming months.
1
Is Mitt Romney now so welcome that you're no longer making Seamus jokes? Say it isn't so!
6
It is the time for everyone to write, call, twitter their representatives and senators and to write to every newspaper in the country asking when is
trump going to Walter Reed hospital for a physical and MENTAL HEALTH examination.
Sarah Sanders said on the record that he was going for examination in January. She said this after he gave a speech when his words slurred (although I heard clacking that sounded like denture came loose).
Where are his children and wife -- they know he is a very mentally ill person and they have not (apparently) taken their loved one to the doctor. OR, is he just a means to an end for his family and to everyone in the cabinet and republicans in the congress? Is their end goal how much money they can make, their donors can make, and how many people who are poor or sick can be further hurt? After all - the rich are wonderful. The poor are dirt to republicans.
Time to demand he go to hospital for examination !!!!
Time for uprising by We The People !!!!!
6
Yes, the poor are dirt to Republicans (bad cop) and mud to the Democrats (good cop). Both distrust the non-propertied to be inherently smart enough to participate in self governing. Nor do they really want to see the additional competition that these poor would add if they truly had the respect of each party ( or only one of them) and were offered a broad concern to providing "the poor" with viable opportunities (health care, education and nominal support for food and housing like the shrinking middle class is privileged to still have).
Blame morning TV, the educational system but mostly blame CONGRESS>... who don't seem to want to do any job at all but hope to quit nd become lobbyists...
We are supposed to have checks and balances. But we only seem to have lawyers who are not known for either their ethics or morality... but trained to win no matter what...
and the testosterone drive boys -- mine is bigger than yours --
Mitt Romney at last ... great.. Possibly he would have been a better choice than Obama who gave us after all Romneycare.
Seriously, is there not one other person in the entire state of Utah that could run for the Senate? Mitt? That's it? Someone wake up over there and give it a shot, please.
4
Just have to say that you made me laugh. Generally, I wince when I read about the latest scary, childish tweets, but you gave me a moment of pure amusement on a snowy day. Thank you.
2
How far have we fallen? How far have the goalposts moved?
The notion of Mitt Romney as moral leader of the GOP, someone to get excited about? What a disturbing exercise in perspective.
4
The GOP has fallen far enough that a Romney is better than most of those that the GOP today supports. And he's popular in his state, which is also important (a democracy - so representing the opinions of the voters IS a key qualification).
1
Ah - isn't moral Republican sort of an oxymoron?
2
What? You didn't mention Seamus.
2
Gail, Congratulations for taking the high road: you resisted the temptation to say that the buttons these fearless leaders have on their desks were extras of the big, red "EASY" buttons from the Staples commercials.
5
I was actually imagining the Staples buttons.
3
Thomas Anthony Harris wrote "I'm O.K...." Two recent presidents have been exemplary of the "I'm O.K., you are not O.K." model he proposed. I saw this with so many of the brats I had as classmates in an exclusive private school. Donald J. and George W. were both abandoned by their parents. Neither man was allowed into the home until he was "groomed" by babysittrs, including the "masters" they had as teachers. Sad. And we've suffered through their ego trips to the tune of trillions. I said this many years ago about George W., as he foisted his wars on us, but few agreed with me.
4
Seamus is already strapped on to the roof of the car and ready to go to Washington!
5
Thoughts:
Trump/Kim: Betcha they both have the same small, stubby, fingers.
Romney: Just another 21st Century Republican, not as smart as many, not as dumb as some, better dressed than most.
10
This is surprising news. I thought these two egomaniacs had lost their buttons long ago.
6
Gail, you brought up Mitt Romney but not Seamus? I'm heartbroken.
2
Gail: a mention of Romney with no reference to Seamus?
What gives?
5
I don't want to die-or have anyone else die, so that two fat bully-boys with silly hair can test whose buttons, bellies or egos are bigger.
Has civilization come to this? We can look deep into the universe, we can amend our DNA we can speak to each other day and night all around the world-and all of that is put in jeopardy for so little.
When Donald Trump says America, he means Donald Trump. When Kim Jung Un says Korea, he means Kim Jung Un. Un killed his brother for power, Trump has stabbed everyone around him who is not "loyal" to him personally- not the country.
When do we awaken and take back control over what we can-our nation?
16
Trump is an attention junkie walking around with accelerant and a bic lighter. "hey look I'm on fire". As long as the conversation is about him, he's happy. Sad little man.
8
No No.... The guy Bannon would pick to run against Romney in Utah of all places would be someone like Ms. Collins suggested but in keeping with tradition the candidate Bannon would choose would also have 4 wives. Because after all, like dating minors is acceptable in Alabama because "It was the norm back then, my own grandmother was married at thirteen!", Having more than one wife "is the norm" isn't it?
3
What you are saying is that Trump lacks the gravitas appropriate to a responsible national leader. Whether or not he is insane is somewhat speculative, but the lack of gravitas is self-evident. He's small potatoes.
4
Gail, You mentioned Mitt but not the dog on the car roof? Clearly it's a new era!
2
It's clearly a tie on their bellies. Neither can tie his shoes without help.
5
“next body parts?”
Gail, don't underestimate the intelligence of your readers with phony salacious innuendo. They have figured out it is already there - a long time ago.
1
Button, button, button, who has the button?
2
This all has the overbearing stench of "same old, same old."
1
I love your columns, Gail, and I try to laugh to keep from crying. Reading trump's deranged and delusional tweets makes me realize that I no longer fear of an international terrorist attack. We have a far more dangerous terrorist sitting in the White House who is capable of destroying the entire planet. And no responsible member of Congress is speaking out or doing anything to dissuade this mad man from his ignorant saber rattling.
8
Trump has already done a comparison of body parts. When Rubio teased him about the size of his hands he responded, defensively, that he’d never had a complaint in that department.
Then his childish vindictiveness took over and he called Rubio Little Marco, obviously not referring to his hight.
4
A return to a norm of Presidential sanity will be so welcome, evem if it is Mitt who brings it in 2021.
1
Toxic male egos comparing their "buttons". This would be quite humorous, if it was not so terrifying.
8
It's a deal when someone (trump) can make romney look good. Kudos to Jeff Flake. I'm still waiting for John McCain to make one last speech to denounce this mess. But then, it might be too late. Lesson for all of us.
3
What I want to know is, since Twitter's usage policies prohibit all sorts of Tweet activities - and Twitter has proven it is entirely willing to suspend or shut down transgressors' accounts - why does Trump get a pass for his regular violations of Twitter's policies?
7
For all their moralizing in Utah before the 2016 election, and containing up until the present, the state still gave more popular votes, and thus their EC votes to Trump. So much for moral principals, but welcoming a current Mass. resident onto their senate ballot this year may salve their conscience.
1
Romney's company owns Staples, or did own Staples, and they have a big "EASY" button for some reason. When Romney becomes president he could make a decal that says "NUKE" that goes on top of "EASY" and have it on his desk. Then, when he has visitors, he could entertain them by pressing the button. Or he could give it to Trump for now and tell him that it is the real thing.
I don't know--is there any possibility that his comments were an attempt at humor? I doubt it, but hope springs eternal.
1
Yes, my memory is also firmly storing the info about his dog having been constrained (?) onto the top of the sedan (?) which had been heading to Quebec(?) for the Family trip. On a different (?) occasion, the writer also reported on Mr. Trump's race horse in a state of severe (?) sufferings due to the lack of attention or affection, or maybe both.
There was one time during my childhood, in which I had not sufficiently sacrificed myself for a dog. But, I rescued abandoned kittens at *three times* in my life. All survived under my intensive care.
So, everyone, let's not divide all human beings simply into two categories; 1) those who rescue dogs/cats/animals or 2) the others who don't. This pre-cautious binary would, in the worst case, produce only antagonized feelings from 1) to 2) --unnecessary, meaningless, -- and possibly even create seeds of prejudgments in vain or malice.
Of course Trump has the bigger button. I bought a cellphone with big buttons for my grandma because she couldn't hit the small ones and Trump is quite old too!
4
I hope that Evan McMullin will not simply concede the seat and at least run a primary campaign against Mittens, but either would be a marked improvement over the worst hack in the $enate, Orrin Hatch.
Recall that after Scalia died, said, “Obama could nominate Merrick Garland, who is a fine man, but he won’t.” In 2010, he called Garland “a consensus candidate,” and promised to help him win confirmation for the seat that eventually went to Elena Kagan. So he threw away all of his principles on Mitch McConnell’s orders.
4
It is time for the American people to show Trump OUR button is BIGGER than HIS. #Vote #VoteEveryElection
11
The "button" or the "football" is not "his," it is "ours," part of a nuclear deterrent that we all paid for, but hope is never used. It is not to be used to impress others like a jacked-up big-wheeled diesel pickup rigged to "burn coal" and flying large U.S. and Confederate flags.
12
Mitt Romney may not have the medals, or all the right buttons, but at least he has a decent haircut. Oh how low our standards for politicians has fallen.
10
Stop on Mitt Romney. He has a record of a spineless weather vane, check the data from his last election. Enough old white rich men. We need democrats to get the sanity back in our government.
9
Romney's competition would also have to have at least eight wives. He'd have a pretty fair chance.
2
I used to use the thumb up gesture occasionally as an expression of "great job done" regarding someone else's achievement. I don't do so any more. Our Supreme Leader has made a mockery of it. To him it means "look how great I am." And he is anything but great. Sad.
12
Didn't Romney have dinner with Trump and supposedly asking Trump for a job in his administration? Unless Trump was lying about the job asking, what makes anyone think that Romney will be the Lone Ranger in the Senate if he is elected?
I'm willing to bet that Romney, who is a Republican first and then a man of principle, will, just like all the other Republicans, sign on the dotted line for whatever Trump wants and/or the Republican congress wants.
9
How quickly we've forgotten "corporations are people, my friend." Not as bellicose or flashy as Trump, but pretty icy and bloodless as I recall.
9
The only hope here is that each country has a professional, disciplined military (we do, them not so much), made up of basically smart people dedicated to their own country's wellbeing, who if necessary and pushed to very uttermost limit would say "no, Mr President, we are not going to initiate that launch sequence".
5
I do think the growing illegitimacy and dangerous policies of the US Executive demand trade sanctions against the US. Preferably from the EU and Asian/Pacific states.
Trade wars are impending this year- and irresponsible environmental and foreign policies- make sanctions necessary.
1
We shouldn't tell Trump that the nuclear launch is not from a button. On the first day of his office the Pentagon provided Trump with a big red button like what they sell at Staples and make him believe that is the bomb button. Now we have to find another toy for him.
5
ah, Ms Colilns, I have missed you.
There is no intellectual basis upon which to make comparisons of Trump to anybody else upon the planet. Sorry. In the old days, one could have found at least one name in a Manhattan telephone book, the same variety we used to put on a chair to raise a child to a higher level.
I have already seen cartoons of Kim's and Trump's [vital] body parts, neither of which is worth the space -such as it might be - that they take up.
For some reason, I now equate small hands etc., with a pea brain.. A hair style can do just so much.
6
2017 was bad enough because of Trump's surprise presidential victory. It's not any surprise that we are starting off 2018 on a dismal note with a slew of Trump Tweets, and the endless and often mindless analysis of them. The republicans and even many democrats seem to have accepted or forgotten that the person running this country is not only a corrupt conman but a pathologically sick and unstable person. And too often, the mainstream media seems to treat it like entertainment. It seems to me there's much too much laughter and joking going on. This only helps to minimize and excuse the gravity of this dangerous government. Televisions journalists need to stop treating this like it's a joke. Leave the comedy up to the comedians.
5
I would have loved to have been able to listen in on the re-installed North Korea - South Korea hot line. I bet they spent the whole first conversation sharing complaints about Trump.
5
I am convinced that, if Trump supporters were told he climbed Mt. McKinley in street shoes and his long red tie and never had to use the toilet, they'd believe it. Believe me.
13
At what point do responsible Congressional government LEADERS from both Parties and from within the President's own cabinet and from within the US military step up and say "Enough".
What would it take to get people of stature and influence such as Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan to invoke the 25th Amendment? Or in the alternative, to push for Trump's resignation in light of the strong appearance of coordinated criminal activity by Trump's campaign team during the run-up to the election?
Having a narcissistic, semi-demented clown in the White House is a bad thing. I honestly believe that given the overall strength of our institutions we can survive four years of Trump in the White House. But I also believe that, regardless of whether you are a Republican or a Democrat, a conservative or a liberal, wealthy or poor, America will be a far weaker nation is all the ways that matter after hose four years.
We need our leaders to actually step up and behave like leaders.
4
Stature? McConnell and Ryan?
Surely you jest.
3
Agreed. But you are not going to get that from the Republicans, who have consistently shown their preference for marching in sycophantic lockstep behind a single imperial leader (Nixon, Reagan, W., etc.) rather than showing true leadership and doing what's right for democracy and all the people of this country.
Did we not fight a revolutionary war to get rid of imperial leaders?
2
I suspect that in a men's prison, the button analogy would be much cruder than to haircuts. I also suspect this has crossed Ms. Collins's mind, though she is limited to news that's "fit to print." Have we not evolved to a stage where a display of manliness, in the zoo, or in the wild, for example on PBS's Nature program last night, gets the prize? Apparently not.
2
Honestly, I thought this conversation had reached its low when a GOP primary debate devolved into insults over hand size and what “they” say about men with small hands. Then came the inauguration and Spicer’s assertion that it was the biggest, most impressive crowd ever. The theme has continued throughout this hellish year.
At this point, how could anyone think this was about the size of buttons?
6
Better hair, maybe, but that's about all there is.
3
If Trump said about his button "it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his, and my Button works!” and if there is no such button on his desk then either Trump is delusional (nothing new) or his "button" is a metaphor for a body part, so they are already comparing body parts. In the latter case, Trump is also showing a good sense of humour and ability to be ironic. So he is a funny guy ! If he gets a decent haircut, then he will be almost perfect. Give the man some credit !
Fortunately his hands are too tiny to push that giant button.
5
Yes, yes, I clearly recall John F. Kennedy's similar exhortations directed at that insane despot Nikita Sergeyevich Khrushchev, when Kennedy similarly declared that we had a bigger button, etc. etc. No, wait a minute, that didn't happen, we'd all be dead now. Never mind. That Donald, he's so FUNNY!
4
For a guy in his eighth decade Trump sounds very immature. Does he remember nothing of the Cold War? Does he remember nothing of the Bay of Pigs or the Cuban Missile Crisis? Does he remember nothing about the treaties we negotiated and signed with the former Soviet Union? On all counts the answer is probably yes, he remembers nothing because it wasn't about real estate or him.
The Chinese have figured Trump out. They have played him for the fool he is. They know that they will be able to get away with a lot more with Trump in office than they could with his predecessors. Why? Because Trump has no interest in or understanding of diplomacy, history, or the world outside his window. He might as well be the last czar of Russia with Rasputin telling him what to do because he's about as aware of how the world words as Russia's last czar was. Nicholas might have been surprised that there was a revolution but no one else was.
Note to Trump: buttons don't save nations. Leaders save nations. Real leaders with experience, intelligence, competent personnel, and a sense of history and a willingness to reach out to others when necessary.
13
Trump has shorter fingers. His belly though is bigger than Kim's.
12
There once was a man with a button
The biggest; it’s beyond discussion
Its size was gigantic
Its purpose satanic
With one push our end would be sudden
19
Well, let's just think about the last week, sans the Staples buttons on the desks. South Korea has decided that the lunatic they prefer to deal with is Kim, not Trump. Let that simmer for a while.
19
We do live in sad times, Gail. Probably most of us were looking forward to the "peace dividend" from the demise of the Soviet Union, but instead we face two unstable tyrants, each with nuclear buttons.
Well, okay, Trump has a briefcase. I hope it's a decent one, maybe the Thom Browne leather attaché case with tricolor stripes, available a Neiman-Marcus for a mere $4,200, fitting for nuclear codes. Perhaps Trump and Kim could start an accoutrement war. It's right out of Jonathan Swift.
I'm not feeling real confident about the year to come, Gail, but having Mitt back in the news brings a sense of nostalgia about the bad old days that were better than today. Posters here hate him, but nothing was worse than Hatch's obsequious overtures to Trump. If we have to have Trump and a Republican government, at least we can have some Republican legislators with spines.
But remember, if Roy Moore got in, the Senate was going to have an ethics inquiry about him. That incident with the dog on Romney's car roof could do him in.
6
Ms. Collins: You are the one making Freudian innuendos about this. That's called "creating" news, setting up carnival dummies to knock down. Someone could just as easily ask what your issue is with "size."
1
Part of me -- the part that doesn't wake up scared to death every morning about what the day's news will bring -- believes that it is good for the Korean people to work out their own differences and leave us -- the nation that Phil Ochs referred to as "the Cops of the World" -- out of it.
8
Who knew that Trump would make us miss Mitt Romney. Mitt: the man who succeeded as a consultant by being the perfect courtier/companion/listener/enabler to rich, selfish, arrogant, over-confident leaders of companies. But not once has he bragged about his various body parts.
Leadership by obsequiesness. Definitely a step up from leadership by lies/corruption/treason, I suppose. And better than the leadership by ignorance and abject stupidity as shown by our own California Congress-vermin Nunes,
Vote for the Democrat, however flawed, as if your life depends on it.
9
Mark Johnson, I miss W and that's saying something because W gave us the 2008 recession.
4
W also gave us to senseless, expensive wars. My son and son in law fought in them, both of them lost friends in those wars.
2
Yeah, Mitt Romney. Just what this country needs is another republican sub-mediocre know-nothing who only believes in money for the already monied and his cronies, the other "makers". Not like the rest of us takers.
Who certainly knows where he [and adorable Ann] were born, as opposed to, you know, those who don't know where he was born, I guess. A little misbegotten touch of birtherism.
Then there were the New Hampshire trees and the cheesy grits and the incessant dog abuse and the ironing of his own clothes while said clothes were on his body.
You think Mitt couldn't replace Trump in the dumb department? I grant you Trump wins hands down in the demented-juvenile race, but Mitt can make up for that in his many obnoxious tics, his mincing shuffle, and the dog abuse. Whatever we think of Mr. T, he hasn't abused any animals that we know of.
He saves that for women.
6
Trump has a very big button and Kim Jong-un can't resist pushing it. He gets a reaction every time. Fun at parties.
12
I was disappointed. When Gail got around to Mitt I thought we would get a reference to the dog on the roof.
3
Kim Jong-un may have a button, but Donald has a bigger Button! A working Button!!
It has become a competition to see who is the bigger clown, our Dotard or Rocket Man. The president of the United States has reduced himself (and his brand) to the level of a third world, third rate dictator. It is impossible to imagine any other president, or that any of the other candidates from the past election, being so easily baited. It is depressing to think that we can probably look forward to 3 more years of this foolishness, and looking back that nearly 63 million Americans were gullible enough to vote for him. One hoped that Donald would change, rise to the level of the office and evolve into a leader. Instead, what we have are daily tweet storms and Covfefe!
5
Ms. Collins will be the first one to close her office door when the comparison of body parts starts...
2
Mitt Romney to the rescue. No so fast. Romney the phony religious fellow who trashed Trump during the campaign but ran as fast as he could to the golf resort to kneel before him for a job as Sec of State. Romney who wrote off 47% of Americans as trash that don't matter. Romney is supposed to save Congress, not a chance. He will be another gaslighter like Flake, McCain, Collins, Graham, Murkowski, and Sass. He will tow the line and smile for the cameras.
9
It's yet again deeply dismaying to see such a serious issue reduced by Gail Collins to cocktail party humor.
1
Indeed, no.
To relieve stress and tension with a touch of humor lets us set back, pause, think more clearly, and be more creative about the prospects of challenging the unthinkable.
3
Oh, buzz off. No one's done more for Americans' collective sanity than Gail Collins.
3
Breitbart centerfold- thanks for the laugh Gail Collins!
7
Romney to the Senate. Mike Pence is forced to resign because of some peccadillo, Romney is chosen as Vice-president, Trump is forced to resign, Romney is the new president. (They are just following the Nixon playbook)
2
One third of the country is so craven and corrupt that they think this is all just peachy. I sadly count two of my own (disowned) siblings in that number. I know all their gaps and deficits. Racism and religious fanaticism that has nothing to do with the words of Jesus are at the heart of their darkness. Beleive me, they are not policy wonks. Republican politicians might find the spine to act in defense of their country if these people did not persist in approving of Trump. The problem with America is Americans.
14
Don't count on Romney not to grovel before Trump. He's done it before, many times. May the Democrats have enough $$$ to run a good ad campaign.
13
Despite the humour we can all draw from the daily news to get us away from the insanity and sadness of it all, there is one conclusion to each day's episode of Presidential tantrum and dose of tweets: the Republican party is complicit, has done nothing to protect the American people from this monster and they will pay at the polls. They own this problem and the longer they wait to fix it the worse it will be for them. RIP the Gop!
11
Trump just stated a fact. It's the media that's "making a big thing" about it.
3
A usual, it's not Trump who concerns me. All of this was predictable. It's the millions of Americans who voted for him and continue to support Trump who worry me.
18
Ms. Collins, your article begins by referring to Trump as 'our President'. I along with many other Americans disavow any authority Trump may have claimed through his criminal occupation of the White House. He may be the president, but he is not our President.
10
Sad to say, he may not be "our president" in spirit but he definitely is in law. There lies the "stuck" button.....unless events take a sharp turn.
2
America is driving through the quagmire of misfortune in terms of leadership, values and national identity. We are to the point that even a politician like Romney looks great compared to the current shady characters of this administration. After just one year Trump has demolished the credibility of this country inside and abroad and now the world is even more scared because of his childish behavior toward a crazy dictator like Kim Jong-un. At this point I guess that only a miracle can save this nation from the abyss.
5
If only more commentators would mine the rocks for the gems Gail Collins regularly delivers. The more we laugh at the lunatics who've dedicated themselves to the defeat of reason the more likely we'll turn away from that lunacy.
10
"Who would ever have thought that Mitt Romney could look that good? But at least he has all his buttons."
True, Gail -- but what about his dog?!
4
Another story criticizing or mocking Trump is good for entertainment. However, he’s not the real problem. His supporters, his “base” (an appropriate word)...they are the real problem. To a point , I can understand how some people were duped into voting for him, but, 12 months into his term, can there be any logical or moral justification for supporting this cretin ?
The members of the base, should spend their time looking for a genuine conservative who’s intelligent, qualified and somewhat normal. I’m not conservative, but, not that many years ago, there were conservatives in this country who were worth listening to. They caused liberals like me to think, to re-examine my views, and, in some cases, to change them. Are there no conservatives like this left anymore, or, are they all too afraid of the the unreasoning “base”?
15
As pathetic and insulting as a "binder full of women" was and still is, somehow it no longer sounds as bad with trump in office.
Too many of trump's base and Republicon congressional minions believe in and worship the trump in the white house. They are as ignorant as the North Koreans who believe and worship the Kim dynasty. The difference is trump's base has no excuse for their ignorance.
14
Come on Ms. Collins; do you want us to believe that the Groper-in-Chief wasn’t metaphorically comparing body parts? If that’s the case, we’re never going to control sexual harassment let alone stop it.
5
It amuses me to no end to hear those who thought Clinton wasn't "progressive" enough are some of Romney's biggest supporters. Even Trump didn't think America was stupid enough to vote for him
7
Despite the fodder for late night comics, Randy Rainbow song parodies, and clever cat picture slogans, there is nothing funny about Donal Trump as President. It's not just the Office of the President, but for member of Congress and cabinet members as well. We not only expect but deserve people of intelligence, thoughtfulness and reflection, who seek wisdom and guidance from history and experts. When we instead get zealots, dialogues, and anything-for-power bloviators, we should weep, not laugh.
Still, when you look at the haircuts of these two guys, when Trump does his finger jestering while trying to sound sincere and convincing, while those North Koren troops do a high stepping moon dance, it's impossible to stifle a laugh. Let's just hope their "my momma can beat up your momma" posturing never goes any further.
10
Button, button, who's got the button? Two idiots that I know of. One sits as a dictator half a world away. The other resides in the people's house, courtesy of millions of equally poorly educated semi-literates and political opportunists who rode this parasite right into the White House and the most powerful position in the world.
Here's the big difference. Kim was not elected by his people. He was appointed by his dictatorial father. North Koreans have an excuse. They cannot be held responsible for endangering the world. They had no choice in the matter. What's America's excuse?
DD
Manhattan
20
“Since taking office I have been very strict on Commercial Aviation.”
As opposed to Obama, who was so weak when it came to plane crashes. Sad.
No Ebola outbreaks in northern Minnesota, either, Mr. President. Well done!
14
NA- my husband works for a natural gas utility. Who knew it was trump's efforts that kept the towns from blowing up? Silly hubby, he thought it was he and his crew who kept the townspeople safe! I'm sure he'll be both grateful and humbled to know where the credit really lies. As will his crew. Good thing we have trump to keep our loved ones and the whole world safe!
8
Egad! Mitt Romney! Calling him an empty suit insults empty suits everywhere!
6
Mr. trump is a pathetic and insecure little man. His team has been told to spoon feed him positive news and praise despite what is true in reality - And these same people call college students "snowflakes" for having safe spaces on campus (eyes roll).
13
When Trump got into office, I said that Americans will get what they deserve. Are you enjoying it so far? The White House looks like a mental hospital these days - people denying reality, raving, yelling at each other. Get these clowns out of there - or ask for a military take over !
7
Kim Jong Un is a loathsome, narcissistic dictator. But Trump makes him seem rational by comparison. Kim Jong Un has played Trump perfectly. The S. Koreans now realize that Trump is willing to sacrifice them in order to prove his manhood. Hence, the slight thawing of relations between North and South Korea.
The N. Koreans had no choice. N. Korea is a dynastic dictatorship.
What is our excuse?
16
If it does come down to a comparison of body parts, I vote for hair. I would love to see a smack down between the midget and the madman over who has the worst coiffure. Shoot, having a hairdo like either of these two guys should automatically exclude you from any public office due to an overwhelmingly obvious lack of judgement, self awareness, or mirrors in the bathroom. So I say...BRING IT ON!
11
Romney would be a breath of fresh air in the White House.Finally an adult in charge.From Milt to Mitt.Good luck all the way.
1
PLEASE don't tell Trump about Michael Huerta, the head of the FAA. Mr. Trump has been trying to clean house of all President Obama's appointees, and he'll fire Huerta once he finds out he missed one. Nevermind that he can't find enough people willing to work for him, to replace all the judges, administrators, etc. that he's let go.
5
And today Kim announced that he’s going to negotiate with the South, which should lead to a deescalation.
This has been a goal of ours for years. How did we get it? By goading Kim into idiotic gestures, by applying pressure to China, by ratcheting up international and US sanctions, and the whole while having our PR genius President keep the spotlight on Kim.
Only a silly progressive, the kind who might think a Bush, Clinton or Romney could beat Trump, would see this victory as a loss. And only a craven progressive, the kind who would rather see a win for a mass murdering tyrant than their own President, would be able to totally ignore what just happened today because of a Tweet from two days ago.
I think the Progressives should get used to staying in the political wilderness. I see no evidence that they’re adapting to reality, and I fully expect multiple attempts to run on Obama’s disastrous lead-from-behind legacy and identity-grievance politics in 2018 and again in 2020.
1
Butch, how could you have held your laughing self in check long enough to write, "...our PR genius President...?"
Or is "my whatchamacallit is bigger than your watchamacallit" really the new genius?
3
The Sub-Title of your column on the Home Page of today's edition reads 'Next there will be a comparison of body parts'. That's what this has been all along. Don't you follow DJT and his middle-school logic? Why are we tolerating this?
5
We have surely reached the point of no return when it comes to ridiculous rhetoric. At this point, we are all so saturated with Trump's grandiose and outlandish one-upmanship tweets that we no longer pay such close attention. "Oh yeah....he's back on the school yard with Kim Jong un ? Hahaha!!"
Example:
Media at Press Briefing: Sarah, today the President tweeted to NK's Un that we aren't afraid 'cause he (DT) has a bigger button.
Sarah Sanders: The President is definitely protecting the US by addressing Un directly regarding our ability to take control of the situation should war be the necessary course. However, the President, in this case, was speaking of his belly button.
Oh the media! Those Fake News guys! How could they misread that tweet? Haha!
And this rendition:
Media at News Briefing: Sarah, we understand that NK and Trump are at it again throwing around insults and bragging about their nuclear might. Is Trump trying to incite war?
Sanders: You media people are all alike, jumping to conclusions. No. The President clearly is NOT inciting war with NK. They're "pushing each other's buttons."
Oh my. What have we reduced this country to? I say, Trump should just eat one more Big Mac to prepare for a big belly bump w/Kim Jong Un at their next meeting and call it a win. That way both of them can claim victory. Until then, button button, where's the button? They games they play!
(hopefully this crazy duo will never get a chance to hit any real buttons)
7
What do the people who "knew" a war was inevitable should Clinton be in the WH think about Leghorn Foghorn a year in bragging about the size of his nuclear "button" on a "tweet"?? The oracle crowd needs to make amends to America.
So now Trump is telling the world he can *barely remember* Breitbart's button-kissing editor who was his own Chief of Staff, Coffee Boy George Papadapoulos his foreign advisor, or Paul Manafort, his campaign manager. The old boy's memory is like swiss cheese.
10
Wow!
Ms Collins is so excited about Romney running and giving Trump a hard time (as am I) that she forgot about Mitt's dog on the roof.
4
Collins is wonderful, but when it comes to Trump in 2018 I plan to liberally use the mute button. And the equivalent (X) on my computer to wipe out all Trump tweets or stories about Trump tweets. I can't stand the thought of another year of news driven by Trump and nothing but Trump.
5
They can compare feet, hands, etc. But what needs to be compared is brain function. Can either detect what is real?
On one side you have Trump, a 71 y.o. man with bad diet, who never exercises, and must be under a crushing amount of stress. He is never wrong, and will construct a fanciful world around himself to prove it.
On the other side you have a young man who feels like he has to be as tough as his family before him. He is never wrong. He can do miraculous things to the world around him. And he must live in fear that if he is not tough enough, the generals will find a way to move him out.
When they come into conflict, they are desperate to out-crazy each other.
That might even be entertaining without the red buttons both brag about.
7
I can't understand why Ms Collins would rail against Trump for his fabulous achievement in making the skies great again for flying. There are so many things that indicate his presidential success. Some examples (besides no gas explosions here, either): my hemorrhoids are not acting up; last spring, the rain actually did help the rhubarb; the sun continues to circle the earth every day; the price of tea in China has stabilized. I could go on and on, but I why bother? His greatness is obvious to all who have the special vision to see it.
14
What can you say about an ignorant, childish, schoolyard bully who is also a clueless dotard utterly unworthy of, and incapable of grasping the complexities of, the office he purports to occupy? Yet, if he is indicted or impeached, or if he has (unlikely as that would be) the good sense to resign, we would be stuck with Medieval Mike Pence and his own brand of 7th Century theocracy. Help!
7
Given the maturity levels of these two If this isn't a comparison of certain of their body parts, i would be surprised.
2
A child, it seems, has absentmindedly walked into the cockpit of our 707 and locked the door...
2
Romney, just as any other Republican, has no moral compass. As Governor of Massachusetts he revived an early 1900 rascist law that, at that time, forbid most blacks from marrying in Massachusetts and used that same law against same-sex couples when a Massachusetts Judge, raised in South Africa and familiar with Apartheid, found that same sex couples could marry. Forget the dog. This man is an an expert at "man's inhumanity to man".
6
Romney may have 'all of his buttons', but does he have all of his marbles? Remember the family dog on the roof of his car?
3
Collins: " But at least he has all his buttons."
Good one, Gail. But I wouldn't bet the farm on it.
2
I can't get too hopeful about Romney opposing Trump.
We saw him fold like a cheap suit when there was a possibility of becoming Secretary of State. And we've watched Lindsey Graham ride around in the golf cart. Besides, every day brings fresh reason for a principled man to stand up and say "enough." Bottom line, there are no trustworthy, dependable, country-first Republicans. Not a single one.
11
Uta Maryland
Great as always! Thanks.
1
Have you noticed that the Trump ascension, otherwise known as the Full Employment for Comedians Act, has become significantly less side splitting in recent months? This past Christmas the malls were more crowded than they have been in ages, the decorations were as sparkly as ever (but not more so, no merchant seemed out to out-do itself), but the music was downbeat and the faces even more downbeaten, downtrodden even.
Now you suggest that that small box hiding behind the tree stand with no recipient's name tag on it and nobody could remember buying it actually contained the ghost of Christmas past beneath its adorable Raggedy Andy wrapping paper. "Woof!" it barked, and out leapt Seamus and all the merry gang, straight from the snowy roof. "Joy to the comedy world" they chorused gleefully.
But I've stopped laughing. Something's caught in my throat. Maybe it's Alec Baldwin. It feels big as somebody's boot.
Trump's "mine's bigger than yours" comment is funny to all but pickled church ladies. Fact is he might share a certain sense of humor with KJU. Fact is he might be negotiating with KJU. Fact is KJU seems to be cleaning up his act a bit and maybe we will finally make some progress on this issue.
I agree that the aspect of Romney running for office is down there with the button size contest. But are we to presume that this is just life in the new alternate right wing reality? Or does it just a another misdirection of our attention to the serious money that is shaping this country into banana republic status?
4
At least with Gail's command of humorous contrasts, we will be able to die laughing.
Some hope though. As with the Alabama Senate race, with a more "woke" voting populace just one year later, Trump (Moore and less) -never- would have won over HRC (Jones, despite HRC's lack of support of leftward enthusiasts and Libertarians.)
We are in this national nightmare and at the brink of world calamity largely because the early November 2016 polls were predicting HRC's cake walk through the glass ceiling which turned out to be "so fake news".
Complacency kills.
2
It is all undeniably entertaining and even funny to a point, except that it is not; this is the President. If any of us encountered an individual in our professional or private lives who talked and acted like Trump, we would reach the obvious conclusion: this individual is not thinking clearly. And he is not; diagnosis aside, people who are thinking clearly simply do not behave like this. Trump is a clear and present, and daily, threat to our nation.
5
Ok, you didn't do it, so somebody has to:
"So it's likely that Mitt and his family will once again be taking that long trip from Utah to Washington, hopefully, this time, with the dog inside the car and not on the roof."
There, at least I feel better, more complete.
We need at last two new laws for our public officials. Term limits of two terms and nobody over 62.
4
The red button on Donald's desk calls the valet for another diet Coke. Isn't that chilling?
5
Au contraire, that's appropriate. That's the only button he should have. If he didn't have such a unique look, maybe General Kelly could find a few "Daves" out there who could take his place while he plays with his special button.
1
Imagine his grand arrival back to DC, as he navigates a turn onto K Street, ever proper and prim, yet inexplicably, with a DOG perched on the roof of his car. My. How bizarre.
let's all chip in and get them both a STAPLES EASY button...
4
Oh yes, his button is bigger and apparently Mr. Wolf and Mr. Bannon has pushed it big time. Only hope that N.Korea & S. Korea can maintain their open dialogue. Diplomacy works.
3
we shouldn't shame donald just because his hands are so small. obviously, he's lived his life trying to overcome his disability. but to lead a racketeering enterprise to overcome that disability is a step too far. his children, especially his daughter, should have a talk with him.
2
Sadly, a Senator Romney voting record will look exactly like a Senator Hatch voting record, but the upside is:
1. Senator Romney will never refer to Donald Trump as "possibly the best president ever."
2. During his tenure as a Senator, there will be many opportunities to revisit the one question that all Americans have about Mitt Romney: was the movie "Vacation" the inspiration for his decision to transport the Romney family dog on the roof of the car when they went on a a 600-mile road trip?
1
Romney came close to Hatch-like comments after that famous dinner. I was shocked by it at the time.
Another terrific piece from Ms. Collins.
A real nuclear-button backstory: Air Force Major Harold Hering, a nuclear missileer who held the real nuclear "button" (actually a set of pretty ordinary keys that unlock and arm a group of nuclear-tipped missiles) – once asked, "How can I know that an order I receive to launch my missiles came from a sane president?"
Mjr. Hering was discharged for the asking. Is it time to provide an answer? I think it is.
As a small side order - the President can order a nuclear launch but does not have the capability to physically do so. The nuclear "football" contains code that verifies who he is along with some targeting information. Other's also have launch authorization - so-called "pre-delegates" - as one presumption is that no one at National Command Authority (Washington, DC) would be alive.
1
A year and more of allowing Donald Trump to compose and craft your world, the way you see yourself, your peers, your nation, and your future. With every weekly attempt to diminish his stature you confirm his influence over you, and you're inability to do, and think, of much else. I'm sure he's very pleased to have such unshakeable control over so many. Perhaps, at some future time you'll look back over these years, the time we didn't spend thinking and writing of other things, dreams, and people, thinking about something other than a man you hate.
I'd rather hoped you'd be better than this. Perhaps you still can.
Best wishes in 2018 and the future.
I'm hoping we can learn some precise body measurements when the results of Trump's upcoming medical exam are made public. Size matters in international diplomacy!
3
A BIG thumbs up to whomever decided to contextualize Tom Brenner's great multi-layered photograph for this article !
Have you forgotten? That comparison of body parts actually happened during the primaries.
1
My internal picture is that his button is one of those Staples "easy" buttons which has been modified with a sharpy. And I'm talking about Mr. Trumps desk, not Mr. Kims.
1
"Next there will be a comparison of body parts. "
I thought that's what this was. It began with comparing himself favorably to Little Marco Rubio, remember? Is Trump president of the United States, or president of the Seventh Grade?
3
Now that Kim has opened the door to South Korea he has made Trump look like a chump. Kim comes across as a man not to be underestimated which Trump does not seem to get.
Regarding Mitt Romney running for the Senate it won’t make any difference. Just another rich white guy in the Senate. And a Republican at that.
But thanks for making me laugh.
1
Good grief. I thought it couldn't get any worse than last year. But now the American Dotard and the North Korean Missile Man are comparing the size of their nuclear buttons.
I don't EVER want to read or hear again about how "flawed" Hillary Clinton was as a candidate. What a joke. There is now a certifiable lunatic in the White House.
Hillary Clinton on her very worst day would have been 1,000 times better a President than Donald Trump on his very best day.
What a nightmare.
24
Juanita, I agree with you on HRC 100%. However, the GOP in the House and the Senate would have made her presidency a nightmare-- questioning and challenging her every word, rehashing e-mails and Benghazi over and over again. Yet those same GOP folks are USING trump to win their agenda: turn the federal courts into a right-wing kangaroo court; enact a tax theft good only for the masters; overturning the ACA (eventually); threatening our social safety net of SS and medicare; killing off the federal agencies they despise, killing our future as they do so. On the other hand, Hillary herself would have been great-- calm and certainly not dangerous. And the "stuff" the GOP is winning-- not a chance-- she woulda gone down swingin'.
1
"Breitbart Centerfold." GC is a gift to humanity.
9
Eh, Romney? It's true that the Osmond family made Mitt's group appear wholesome and even normal. But I urge anyone who is interested to take a closer look. Ex-mormon dot org is a good place to check out for specific details and experiences of those who dared to question the misogyny, racism and cult behaviors.
5
Symbolism in words and the photo.
1
Always nice to enjoy a giggle in the morning, thanks Gail! Seriously, Donald thinking he is responsible for "airline safety" is a huge joke!!! And ....his tweet about "whose nuclear button" (FYI Donald, it's not a button!) is bigger.....is simply pathetic!
I want to thank all the Americans who voted for this nutcase to be the president!! YOU, Republicans own this disaster of a president!
Deplorable man!
7
You know that they are already comparing body parts.. they weren't talking whose button is bigger but whose "button" is bigger... ahhhh, Euphemisms
Gail! How could you not use this opportunity to mention one of your favorite things to ever happen, Mitt Romney driving 12 hours with his dog strapped to the top of his car! :)
1
I assume the dog was in a crate?? Dogs in the backs of pick-up trucks make me really nervous.. having once had a dog jump out a car window to chase a squirrel -- that was before AC in cars.
Well done!
OMG, and this President is role modeling for all the young people in the world, it's just sickening. This Republican President is such an embarrassment to America, its beyond the pale. When will it end.
Save a Republic, remove a Republican!
11
Every day that this disgraceful thief remains in office...it's on WE, THE PEOPLE.
4
"...and then we can have an exciting race with Romney versus a far-right puppy-beater who lives in a cabin on a hill surrounded by machine gun turrets." You mean, Romney, who once tied his dog to the roof of a car versus a far-right etc. #RememberSeamus
2
I just read the column on Twitter as to whether they could shut down Trump's account...is it going to take N Korea (led by another ignorant chest-thumping gorilla) dropping a bomb and killing people for the company to recognize that his tweets are an inherent threat against people just to satisfy his ego? At this moment, I am ashamed to be an American.
4
I took the "puppy-beater" comment as in lieu of mentioning that Romney "drove to Canada with a dog strapped to the roof." Very clever.
1
I think we should compare their respective stomachs next.
2
You say, "and then we can have an exciting race with Romney versus a far-right puppy-beater who lives in a cabin on a hill surrounded by machine gun turrets."
Wait a minute. Isn't that far-right puppy abuser who lives in a mansion on a hill surrounded by car elevators, isn't that our Romney?
Can't tell 'em apart anymore.
2
"then we can have an exciting race with Romney versus a far-right puppy-beater who lives in a cabin on a hill surrounded by machine gun turrets."
First good laugh of the day, thanks.
Gail,
Trump will wait for Romney to be elected to the US Senate, then dangle Secretary of State after Tillerson's resignation. On Romney's first day as Secretary of State, Trump will then fire Romney.
What about Romney's dog, Seamus? I don't believe Seamus is too keen on making the long journey from Massachusetts to Utah--inside a cage that sits---atop Romney's van. The poor dog has PTSD from his last Romney's road trip, but at least Seamus can look forward to being hosed down by Romney. Right?
People of Utah, save Seamus, reject Romney!
I'm reading this column, having my usual chuckle at Ms Collins' insights into our political comedy show --- "Honestly, you'd think Kim had executed every barber in his country"... hysterical.
And then she gets to Mitt Romney, and a big grin spread across my face as I waited for it... waited for it... waited for it. But it never came. 3 paragraphs on the new candidacy of Mitt Romney. And not a single mention of him driving from Utah to Washington with his dog strapped to the roof of his car.
What a disappointment.
Donald Trump has not progressed beyond a 6 year old. His parents did an awful job of parenting. Perhaps let him have his way and when he got out of control they put him in military school. So he, Donald, gets himself a general as Chief of Staff who is similarly stuck in his childhood. Head scratch. Followed by head slap. Ouch my head is beet red from all the slapping.
2
Trump has already filed to run in 2020 and he certainly won't be at a loss for campaign slogans.
May I suggest a radium tinted hat that glows in the dark, with the slo-go on the front "my Button works" and above the band at the back "covfefe."
Those gems certainly belong in our book of political Familiar Quotations. Along with such other memorables as "I had a dream," or "Ask not what your country can do for you," or "a nation conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal." Since, also, many people don't know that Lincoln was a Republican. Or that Frederick Douglass is doing an amazing job. Or that once again, Obama is being reborn in Kenya.
2
this is the best column gail has ever written!
It's amazing Trump has time to tweet dozens of times a day, including days he's supposed to be working. He gets an early start and finishes late in the day. He has no time for briefings and meetings, no time to read anything (other than responses to his tweets), little if any quality time with Melania et al. He has to squeeze in a few days here and there at Mar-a-Lago and other Trump venues he promotes. This guy is busy, busy, busy. And his signature on executive orders and acts of Congress gets bigger and bigger. At least we know he knows how to sign his name -- even though there's no time for him to read what he's signing. Then it's Foxtime -- all day apparently -- where our president picks up all the stuff he needs to tweet about.
3
Dear NYTIMES: Please lead the way by no longer referring to Donald Trump and President in the same article. I contend that his name is and has long been a commercial product, and as such it has no place being used in conjunction with Presidential activities. Thank you
4
We've already had body part comparisons. Remember "I guarantee you there's no problem?"
2
Size does matter. Some overcompensation here for other shortcomings ?
1
my worry is that in his total lack of conscience or empathy, a "wag the dog" situation is possible. If Mueller come us with evidence, as seems possible, of illegal financial transactions, and treasonous dealing with Russia to subvert the election...and more, this puerile and belligerent man could actually "push the button". I have no doubt that the deaths of millions wouldn't give him one sleepless night.
4
"But at least he has all his buttons." And his marbles.
To be honest, if they would ever end up comparing finger lengths it'll be a tie, given that their hands are equally sized. So Kim'll win, being smaller and all...
What a guy!
Only men would get into a debate concerning who's (fill in the blank) is bigger than someone else's.
3
I was surprised to learn the FAA is still headed by an Obama appointee. I would have thought that Trump, our dear supreme leader, would have appointed a bus mechanic to be in charge of the FAA given the other unqualified appointees he has place in charge of other real important agencies.
But, we should not disparage our dear leader whose body parts and qualifications are yuuuuuge in comparison to say, Mitt or Little Marco. And the second coming of Flip Mitt. I can't wait to see the fawning and boot licking that will begin shortly in Red Utah.
5
"Also, the Federal Aviation Administration, which is in charge of air safety, is run by an Obama appointee."
In other news, the Obama appointee in charge of the Federal Aviation Administration has been fired. (Not really. (Yet.))
2
No, no, no. Gail, they won't be comparing fingers, heads or shoes. Go ask your husband, son, brother or any college man you know and they will tell you what will be compared. Clue: it starts with P.
LOL
2
Gail, you hit this one out of the park. Glad to see 2018 allows us to keep laughing with a renewed sense of awe and wonder that this really is happening.
As Bannon keeps up his assault on the republican party establishment, and good grooming and taste, we might see a party so split Mitt might have a problem. After all he was the target of an entire night of ranting by Bannon during the Alabama race.
But, I cannot forget Mitt and his lovely wife, what's her name, going to Las Vegas in 2012 to get the much needed and sought after endorsement from the orangutan who currently fouls our White House.
2
".....who currently fouls our White House".....those are the best of encouraging words. It gives us hope that he will soon be ushered out. Thanks, Bob Laughlin.
Shhh! Don't tell Trump that the person who runs the FAA is an Obama appointee or he will have him/her replaced by a rich Republican who used to raise ducks. Ducks fly, right? Definitely will make him qualified to run the Federal Aviation Administration, according to Trump's standards.
5
For the liberal/progressive democrats it's all about words.
For the conservative republicans it's all about actions.
Actions speak louder than words.
1
Love your columns Ms. Collins.
I look forward to them.
Can always get several good laughs.
However, I would like to urge all media outlets (especially in those red states) do articles on exactly what a nuclear war between trump and North Korea would mean to the people of North Korea, South Korea, Japan, China and the USA.
How many dead in each?
How many injured in each?
At what $ cost to the countries involved?
What about fallout?
And on and on and on.
All of the talk about button size is funny and I would love to see both of these fools show us their buttons.
I also think we should also get serious about what they say and tweet.
3
Sex, crudity and outrageous behaviour sell in the name of freedom of speech. Social networks amplify and excite the crowd. What do you expect?
1
I am not a fan of Trump but my immediate thought was of a scene in Crocodile Dundee where Dundee was walking in NYC with his lady friend and they were approached by a mugger with a switchblade knife. The woman said "He has a knife!" Dundee replied "That's not a knife" - then pulled out a large hunting knife and said "This is a knife". The sight of the huge hunting blade caused the mugger to flee. No one wants a war but when dealing with a threat one must ensure the enemy knows the price they will pay.
1
Anyone that takes any of these shenanigans personally instead of minding their own little piece of paradise, is allowing themselves to be drawn into a media quagmire that fancies itself as a reflection of "national conscientiousness". Continuously allowing oneself to be manipulated, drawn and quartered, and turned into a nervous Nellie should reassess their priority list because it's not getting YOU anywhere.
Romney's run for the Senate is nothing more than a springboard to the White House. Although, given the state of our constitutional system of government, there's no reason to think that the current host of the Apprentice shouldn't also be a contender. The ever-illegitimate Gorsuch and his pals on the Court will have no trouble arguing their way around that pesky little clause in Article II and then we can all enjoy a season or two of the PresTerminator.
1
Gail, don't be naive and start selling Romney's snake oil. Romney was halfway decent until he was being considered for the post of secretary of state by Trump. I believe Romney is just another slick old politician ready and willing to sell his soul to the highest bidder, nothing more and nothing less.
4
I can't think of a bigger ego boost for a pro-wrestler wannabe like Trump. He's gone far beyond fantasizing about body slamming some brute down onto the floor. He's bragging about his power to annihilate an entire nation and he wants the world to know of his awesome might. Omarosa's prediction about the world bowing down before the mighty Trump seems to be coming true, at least in his own mind. This reality TV show president needs to be fired before he gets us all killed.
1
If you had told me during past administrations that a future president would simultaneously be pathetic and horrifically dangerous, I could not have been able to conceive of how. And yet here we are.
5
Mitt Romney only looks good in comparison to DJT, but so does my cat!
7
If Mitt Romney wins the election in Utah (kiely that he will), he will spend the next three years torturing Trump, picking at the scab laid bare by Bannon and Mueller. It will be a fascinating study in human psychology to see whether this causes the complete unraveling of the presidency. Kind of like human "whack-a-mole"
1
After a year of this lunacy the press is still trying to make sense of it all. I guess we all have to earn money how and whenever. The point, however, is that there is no sense to any of it - except to the self-aggrandizement of one poorly educated, overly indulged, puny-brained man. Because that's also all that's happening. It's as if the family (Republicans) got together to make sure poor old demented grandpa never had to feel bad. How all these bragging politicians got to be cowards is still the real story here folks.
4
Oh, sure. Go ahead and make fun of the President. Go ahead. He has been busy working hard to make America great again and you are making fun of his hair. This is a very busy man and you are making fun of his thumb or hands or what have you. What are you? Six?
Everyone knows that the only way the solve the conflict between the United States and North Korea is to put Trump and Kim in boxer shorts and let them go at it World Wrestling Federation style. Winner gets burgers and beer (and a promise not to use nuclear weapons)
1
I thought that this was already a comparison of body parts...
1
Maybe there's an actual correlation between bad government-leader hair, erratic behavior and feeble intellect? Barbers may save us yet.
Thanks for the laugh today, Ms. Collins. I needed it.
Is the American left truly so dim and childish? Trump and SK are so obviously playing good cop, bad cop. Trump is the heavy and pressuring NK. That is why the genocidal dictator is suddenly seeking talks with SK. Will the left ever be able to put aside their blind hatred, used by professional grifters for simple political and personal gain and start thinking rationally like adults? Just where and when do national security, reason and patriotism enter into left wing thinking. Blind, irrational hate does not constitute a political plan or platform. Hate will not be enough for 2018 or 2020.
2
Gail - you didn't mention the dog on his car roof!!!! But its still a great piece!
Really, Ted Cruz's button is the biggest.
1
You know as soon as someone from the White House reads that an Obama appointee is still at the FAA, Trump will send him packing!
3
I would have thought something other than finger length, shoe and head sizes.
3
Always a pleasure to enjoy a bit of your humor wonderfully satirical humor early in the morning. Can’t beat starting the day off with a smile and laugh even if it is rooted in sick realities. And yes, Romney looks like a million bucks right now. But then yesterday’s high temp of fifteen degrees felt like a warm balmy day in comparison to the fifteen below of the previous day. In retrospect I guess that might mean that experiencing the worst often makes mediocrity look real good.
12
Uh-oh, you let the cat out. Trump probably did not know the FAA is headed by an Obama appointee. He’ll probably be gone by the end of the week.
17
I can't believe you missed the opportunity to question whether his return to the Senate would be with the dog on the roof of the car!
11
Trump is obviously a very self-centered, insecure man—not unlike Kim Jong Un..
Spending 4 or more hours a day keeping track of himself on TV, Trump is media obsessed to the exclusion of just about everything else he should be working on as POTUS.
Firings, staff turnover, the Russian investigation closing in on him, I am getting worried because Trump appears to be becoming more and more frenetic and desperate to say anything to: (a) be the center of media attention, and (b) discount his growing unpopularity. The more the Russian investigation uncovers, the more Trump bashes away at Hillary over her emails as supposedly "equivalent" to the Trump campaign's dealings with the Russians.
Trump's childish but totally irresponsible nuclear button war with Kim Jong un is only intended to deflect attention away from Trump's incompetence and failings as an unfit president whose poll numbers, even among his base are in decline.
December Quinnipiac poll: Trump's negative job ratings increased from 38% approve vs. 55% disapprove in Nov. to 35% approve vs. 58% disapprove by Dec. 4. 56% say Trump is unfit to be president compared to 40% (almost all Republicans who still claim he is fit.
A CNN poll showed Trump's strong approval declining among whites without college degrees from 47% to 35%, and other polls indicate his support among rural voters is dropping as well.
What happens when an egotistical, authoritarian charlatan realizes he can't pull off the lies and con anymore?
11
There's no reason to believe that Mitt Romney as senator wouldn't behave and vote exactly like John McCain, Marco Rubio or any other Republican who opposed Trump but refused to break with the party line.
15
Romney has already seen where the votes are and will follow the party line.
"Party Over Principles"-- every time.
2
I am the first to admit that President Trump is unorthodox. (I, along with so many others, also wish we were in a second term of a Romney presidency!) However, what did "orthodoxy" get us with Kim Jon Ung? The Obama administration had a big bark but did absolutely nothing. (Syria red line, anyone?) His administration's complacence allowed NK to develop their nuclear program over the past 8 years. (Un's father had no such ambitious goals. This was all on Obama's watch, friends.)
All I know is that this is the first time any president of either party has been able to get China to help with NK in any matter. Maybe "unorthodox" is what we need now.
If, or when, that "unorthodox" "president" engages into flinging his really large weapons at NK, will you still cheer him on?
Was it a failure on Mr. Obama's part to seek peaceful outcomes without resorting to comparing whose missiles and bombs are larger? I vote to attempt a peaceful resolution rather than our unorthodox "president's" attempts.
4
Getting left out of the negotiations because we have a 3yo driving the country is not a position of power.
This has to be one of your best columns in a long time. Enjoyed it immensely including your punch line at the end. Happy New Year Gail! You're on a roll out of the gate! You must have a lot of buttons...
8
Trump has ushered in CHANGE. If we were rued by adults so far we the people dont want such adults to rue us again.The people who were going round as adults ,all proved to be greedy corporate predators out to prey upon the public exploiting public's gullibility.We are now better off with so called adolescent with some guts and gumption who can call a spade a spade, shoots straight from the hips . The Politicians and the corporate looters my not like him . Trump does what he says he will do. He is one of us .We the people adore and admire him HE IS OUR POTUS . He has reduced their taxes so that they are incentivized to create more jobs in the Us of A and they know what he will do if they don't meet his and the people's expectations . Like the wilyPoliticians of yesterday he doesn't say one thing and do another,normally the opposite of what he said .Not Trump , people's darling bane of career politicians and the political pundits who are losing their jobs and credibility now. Way to go , Trump, We the people are with you.Bash on regardless . We the people want someone like you . Trump, you are doing good despite the fact that main stream media , the puppets of the corporations , try to paint you otherwise . We eagerly look forward to your second term as POTUS . Your enemies inside USA and outside out there in the world are shivering in their pants because of your unpredictability. Keep it that way . The international corporate world has been exploiting America for long .
Whew. That is all I can think of in rebuttal.
@zeitgeist: All politics aside, whatever algorithm generated your comment needs work. Automation has come a long way, but you're not quite there yet.
2
"Trump does what he says he will do." How about carried interest? The wall? Regulating foreign lobbying in elections? Where's that "beautiful, cheaper" health care plan? And how has he stood up for the little guy? The tax scam bill he signed blatantly transfers money from the poor and middle class to the rich and corporations. (Corporations, by the way, that have been sitting on record amounts of money and recording record profits for years, but haven't yet felt the need to let any of that "trickle down" to their workers.) And remember those jobs 45* "saved" at the Carrier plant in Indiana? Well, those workers are still getting laid off.
Oh, and here in America the expression isn't "shivering in our boots," it's "quaking in our boots." Not that we are quaking: patriotic Americans are committed to containing, and removing, this abomination from an office for which he is not remotely qualified.
1
Our collective electorate must continue to search for the EJECT button.
14
Not so fast about Romney's chances in Utah! Yes, Utah is a red state, and Romney is pretty popular, BUT, do you realize that the mayor of Salt Lake City is a lesbian who is also a Democrat? So there is a ray of hope that Utah might overcome it's Mormon "redness" if an outstanding Democrat ran to take over Hatch's Senate seat.
6
It would be nice, instead of speculating about Romney’s political future (seriously, willl the same people who put Mike Lee in the Senate vote for him?) the NYT would start to relentlessly pressure Dems about their choice for the Utah ballot. No matter how good Romney seems, in comparison to the present WH fool, he comes to us from the past, it’s over for guys like him.
137
I support Jenny Wilson, Democrat, for Utah Senate.
4
Agree, enough old white rich men.
4
The NYT relentlessly pressured Americans to pick Hillary Clinton for President and we all saw how that worked out. No pressure, no blackout, no Primary fraud, let the voters decide.
A Mormon who made it in Massachusets, the first Mormon to have become a serious contender for U.S. Moron in Chief, is likely a hero in the heartland of Mormonism. Still I agree the Dems have a game, especially, I´d intuitively say, with a local, Mormon candidate taking up the shining parachuted example of that swampy Washington elite.
A golden chance to say: "Our Mormon is more authentic than yours!"
Tea Leaves, Gail?
It's unlikely Trump will run again me thinks. His ego has been sated and the familia will jettison him if he does. Trump will cave in the end because he has tiny (small button) guts to lose bigly. The "Former President" moniker can sell a lot of cheap hotel rooms with corridors featuring fake Time magazine covers. A better choice for Trumpeters as they peter out like a candle.
Thus, a Romney campaign, however unlikely that is since he isn't a Senator yet, will be a repeat of the last time and the ol' 1% will take a beating. Besides, how many gullible Utahns will vote for Romney with the thought that he'd dump them a year later to start a presidential run? I just don't see it.
3
I lived in Utah for 24 years, the Mormon population will vote for Romney. What the Democrats in Utah need to do is get the Latinos out to vote! And then maybe Utah May turn a bit purple-ish.
1
I've never been a believer in Jingoism. The U.S. had many good things but also many bad things...our health insurance situation just to give an example of the latter.
People chanting about how America is the Greatest Country in the world actually has no meaning nor proof. (Tell a Trump supporter that Mexico or Argentina consider themselves Americans and watch for the befuddlement).
I can honestly say that the last 2 years has made me deeply ashamed to be a U.S. citizen. Perhaps if I was younger, I'd leave the country. Perhaps I still might.
I'm not a snob nor an elitist, just an Adult.
13
Teddy Roosevelt and Thomas Jefferson are alive and kicking. The days of ransom and blackmail are over for now.
2
Even if it's the biggest button around, if what he has is a button, someone should tell Mr. Trump it's best not to talk about it. It was bad enough when he was talking about his hand size!
8
What a great headline for one of the first columns of 2018! You nailed the name for the Trump foreign policy, Ms. Collins, as it applies to enemies and allies (including Merkel and May whose measurements clearly are bigger than Trump's)
3
Bottom line for me regarding Mitt Romney is this: While he may be an excellent candidate for Senator from Utah, I don’t think he should be a potential presidential candidate in 2020. If Mitt Romney could not see that Donald Trump was playing him like a fiddle when he dined with him on the hope of getting a post in the administration, then he is not smart enough to have the job. Most of us could tell that this “invitation” was a fool’s errand, and that the new PREZ-elect was simply demonstrating his power and was vindictively stringing him along to publicly embarrass him later by choosing Tillerson over him. Left “hanging in the wind” like a damp flag, that one episode shows his real character and lack of political savvy. After DJT, we need a diplomatic genius to undo all the harm that has already been done to America’s reputation and world standing. Not so fast on 2020 .... Let’s please focus on 2018 and change the reins of power.
8
For my new years resolution, I've taken up duck-and-cover as my daily exercise routine. It requires practicing quick reactions and crunches under the desk. While I'm down there, I can tweet nonsense to my followers. It's a refreshing start to the day. And it provides a needed break from Trump news.
6
enough with the dog on roof business. back in 2012 it was a good yuk, 2-300 times. in 2018, none of this is funny in the least.
5
I suspect that in the fullness of time Special Counsel Robert Mueller will have on his desk a very large, green colored button with the one word label of "GO".
The color of green, of course, will also symbolize the color of laundered money.
With any luck at all the Mueller launch will occur sometime in this Happy New Year for us all.
Steve Bannon will be chosen by Time magazine to be its Man of the Year.
As for Mitt Romney - a truly minor figure in every sense of the word - he will be closely vetted for any possible element of harassment issues in his background.
Such action will become the norm for all persons seeking political office in the elections of 2018.
Champagne all around to celebrate this new criteria for selection of Congressional office seekers.
Happy New Year !!!
7
Sadly for the US and fortunately for the world, I doubt Kim Jong Un will bite the hook. It is too good an opening to appear conciliatory towards other Asian countries, especially South Korea. He may find common ground with China to drive Asian supremacy further over US leadership.
3
I’ve finally settled on the right moniker for Trump. President Big Button.
10
Mitt Romney still looks and sounds like, well, Mitt Romney, exuding all the inspiration of a snow tire retread. Seamus is now chasing squirrels in the sky, so Mitt will need to find some other warm blooded mammal for his station wagon roof rack.
That said, the only reason that our president's tweeted parry in the international struggle over button size is not utterly gobsmacking is that his juvenility is so dismayingly incessant. From this unbearably vain pre-adolescent comb-over, no taunt no matter how childish, surprises anymore.
14
It’s -15 here in MN this morning- so I needed the chuckles generated by your column!
6
Gail, your column made me chuckle, just when I needed it. The visuals you paint never fail to break the mood.
Thanks
7
Holy Hannah! When can I become comfortably numb?
6
Maybe Romney could drive to Canada with a Trump kennel strapped to his roof.
14
We have to assume you mean that Trump is atop the car with the wind blowing through his golden retriever-like hair. (Apologies to all Golden Retrievers.)
2
This is nothing more than two "Cartmans" on the school yard. We are waiting to see which one cries first.
It would be funny if the security of the world from Nuclear Destruction wasn't so held in the balance.
10
A column mentioning Mitt Romney and no mention of that poor dog!
Gail are you losing it?
10
Gail is leaving it up to us to bring up dogs and trumps strapped to the top of the car.
1
The historians will remember this era as a time when a major political party was completely conquered by people who cared for nothing else but protecting very rich people from having to pay taxes.
34
Trump is like all small time gangsters. They ultimately wish for acceptance in the real world. Mobsters, drug dealers, pimps and even condo developers all wish for one day want to be taken seriously for how great they are.
Except they aren't.
26
The current joke is that Trump's button only looks big because his finger is on it.
20
Thanks first for the headline and photo! Really enjoyed the laugh. Buttons and thumb size are what it's about. And, we now know that Kim Jun Ill was seriously constipated and that Mitt is a medal-less vacuum....cleaner. Scooping up the next opportunity, which, as I understand it, is how Bain handles it's operations. Humiliation doesn't seem to deter these people. Exposure at least gives a good laugh. And exposes these people.
6
Is it possible that one unhinged dictator has mastered the art of baiting the unhinged leader of the free world?
8
Does the White House have a rubber room ?
12
Trump has made commercial air travel safer for us, so what's not to like. Of course the friendly skies won't be so friendly if he starts a nuclear war but heck, he's accomplished so much in his first year as president there's little left to accomplish except the destruction of the entire planet. I hope Michael Wolff's book makes the GOP sit back and think just how big a mistake they've made by putting this abomination in the White House.
13
What do YOU need to see? What must be shown? What actions do you need to see, to decide; “This person is unstable. Incapable of rational thought or decision.” How do you measure their inabilities? What happens when intervention doesn’t work; when they simply do not respond to logical arguments or question; when they remain in defensive denial? How do you decide at what point do you take control of this person before they inflict harm on themselves or others? We have a Vice President explicitly for this. It’s not as though it would be a permanent removal from office. The country would continue.
The alternative is to wait until he does actual damage? We’ve had other presidents’ that started wars on a whim. One knew the Golf of Tonkin was a setup, but found it politically advantages to start a war. Another President unnecessarily rushed to war and bombed 100,000 men, women and children to death in Iraq.
What do you actually need to see before you’re convinced; and what if you’re too late?
11
Maybe all the Trumpsters are worried about the size of their buttons.
9
At the heart of Trump's squabbles with Kim is his jealousy of the North Korean leader. Kim has the power that Trump yearns for. To control the media, to be called "Dear Leader" and credited with everything good, including the weather, to be praised just for existing, to have the most outlandish stories accepted without question (planes don't fall from the sky because of me!). We can see how much Trump longs for the adoration and loyalty of the people Kim enjoys when we see Trump's cabinet praise him and declare their unwavering devotion. Trump preens and puffs out his chest, while Mike Pence credits God for giving the nation Trump as our Great Leader. Trump very much longs to be idealized and admired by a grateful nation, which Kim has and Trump doesn't. This jealousy is the root of Trump's fight with Kim. Trump cannot best Kim when it comes to the love of his people, so he can only try to prove he is stronger than Kim.
14
“Look at those hands. Are they small hands? I can guarantee there is no problem.” These fateful words spoken by our great leader at a debate must have caused the nuclear button caretaker into overdrive. They must have thought “Is the button large enough for Trump’s massive hands? Will he be able to operate the button as it was built for smaller, more normally-sized hands, for mere mortal hands?” I am guessing that the day after election day the workshop was busy building a giant button just for Trump gigantic ego...oops
, I meant hands. God please save us from Trump and Kim....
5
All the folks mentioned in your page are stinking awful, especially the vulgar bully with the 'thinning orange' who believes to be our head honcho... in idiocy. Too many clowns to contend with, hopefully not all at the same time, as there is just one barber...to cut their ego.
3
Gail, you disappoint. Not one mention of Romney's dog riding on the roof of the family car.
3
So Romney may get the last laugh. Could Mormon revenge ever be this sweet. So if Mueller fails, perhaps the geuine religious candidate and actual deal maker par excellence will ride in with his white horse and slay the fire breathing Trump.
2
Gail dear, love your columns, but please don't publicly identify any more Obama appointees. We've had too many competent people fired already. Kindly distract the ogre-in-chief with some other shiny bauble - like maybe a gold button in his bathroom.
17
Boy, it really looks like he has a small thumb in the photo that accompanies the article.
2
Aww - you forgot to mention Mitt’s dog on the roof!
2
I’m guessing that Trump’s Button requires a bit of Viagra for that added boost into orbit.
But back here on earth, my two airline pilot brothers-in-law are sputtering their engines with Trump’s claim of aviation safety. He has had absolutely nothing to do with aviation, except sitting on the gold cans of his airplanes.
11
Nothing funny about two schoolyard bullies with their pudgy little fingers on any button, no matter what size, that can destroy millions of lives and perhaps even more if it spirals out of control. At least one of the two has decided to talk to his neighbor and see if they have some common ground that may lead to peace in Korea. We can only hope that our "big button" head keeps his tweety, twitching fingers to himself for once. Maybe he can distract himself by persuading Mitt Romney to be Secretary of State or even ambassador to South Korea.
6
Extra special credit for 'another Breitbart centerfold,' Gail Collins!
Funny with multiple layers of insight. :)
5
OMG. The dog is coming back.
2
Thank you, Gail Collins!!!
The oppressed people of North Korea have no choice but to deal with the madman who lords over them.
America voluntarily installed a madman into power. How embarrassing. How pathetic.
11
Looking at pictures of Kim Jong-il, particularly in his later years, I am completely willing to believe he never used a toilet.
4
This is dumbing down on steroids.
MR does look "good" compared to Kim and Donald. So does.........as we leap down the rabbit hole.
Mitt ran with Paul Ryan who lusts for the destruction of Social Security and Medicare......
Headache going away yet?
3
So which one’s Frog and which one’s Toad?
“That’s not my button! My button’s red, round, and bigger than yours! Harrumph!”
1
However many buttons Trump has and however big they are, Kim Jong Un sure knows how to push all of them.
9
The outcome of the current Korean Nuclear crisis, where the fate of millions lies in the balance, will be determined by two buffoons, whose hideous coiffures are the perfect metaphor for their narcissistic ignorance. Kim Jong un enslaves people. Donald Trump enslaves the truth and forever destroys the disingenuous myth of American Exceptionalism. The fact that the avoidance of a Korean Peninsula Nuclear holocaust depends on the machinations of these "hollow men", is the ultimate theater of the absurd moment and an existential indictment of the political systems that produced them.
1
Can we stick these two clowns in Seamus' old cage, tape it to the roof of Mitt's station wagon, and have him drive to, oh, Yellowknife?
5
You are not allowed to take vacations, Gail, until our long nightmare is over.
9
Maybe someone should tell them both that the button is a normal sized button. It just looks really big next to their tiny hands.
9
Donald Trump and Kim Jon Il are amusing on their own. It seems a bit lazy for Ms Collins to pass off verbatim quotes as satire. We can recognize the absurdity on our own. What else do you have?
Gail, if Mitt runs, will we get to hear more about the dog on the roof? Or has that one been replaced by a more buttoned-down metaphor?
I read your columns faithfully. Your light-touch, absurdist take on all things political makes our current -- what would you call it, daytime nightmare? -- more endurable.
3
Ms. Collins and her friend Mr. Blow have fairly wrecked my workday by leaving me with images I'm not going to love.
First, there's the wrinkled old button that Mr. Blow's phrasing stuck me with. And now there's Ms. Collins's note about Kim's father's not needing to use a toilet. Here, I see a group of guys with big push brooms walking behind Kim, Sr. wherever he trotted.
Just seeing Trump's puss all over the place is bad enough. Don't add to the misery, please, guys.
7
Trump never had the sand to serve this country. He can't lead a penguin off an ice flow; so instead, we get his .. STUFF .. I'll give it no words.
3
Yes Romney who made his money killing jobs and taking people's pensions oh yes I can see the Trump supporters getting fully behind ole Mittens.
5
The verb for Romney is "reanimate" which is uniquely impossible when ascribed to his robotic presence. His artificial intelligence of the Bain flavor reeks of a spread sheet subject to missing columns or sketchy addition formulae.
Good to see the words Romney and "right wing puppy beater" in the same sentence. As far as the Twittler on the roof is concerned, he keeps channelling Macbeth even though he wouldn't know Macbeth from Mayor McCheese. The manhood thing, the ambition and not knowing what to do with it and the three witches of Bannon, Giuliani and Pence convincing him that what this government needed was a good reality show- and now we endure our "tomorrow and tomorrow with this tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury" let us hope this poor player leaves the stage before it collapses of its own weight.
9
What is beyond my ken is that no one has directed a word or thought to the evil troll whom Mitt my aspire to replace.
1
Let’s hope there is a better candidate than Mitt and the people of Utah are smart enough to elect her.
3
Gail, I am deeply disappointed that you managed to get through an moderately lengthy discussion of Mitt Romney without bringing up that sordid episode about strapping the family dog to the roof of the car on a vacation trip.
2
What is wrong with you people? Kim and Trump are just throwing around a little locker room banter. If I weren't sure that they were each individuals who snuffled and howled each time they stubbed a toe or found a hangnail, I could imagine that they are indulging in MMA trash talk in order to market a new pay-per-view cage fight between two guys who idolize Randle P. McMurphy, not understanding their affinity until it's [almost, one hopes] too late.
Through our passive acceptance of Gerrymandering and exclusive laws based on false claims of voter fraud, we are governed by corporate weasels led by the understudy for Dennis the Menace backed by Savonarola. Mr. Wilson (Mitt Romney) will be as influential now as he was in the comic strips 60 years ago.
Random thoughts:
I suppose a great thing about our form of government is that every voter can claim deniability.
The Trump Presidency is the latest and most egregious stress test ever for the Federal government. Combine his daily outrages, including his somewhat erotic feud with Kim, with the GOP plan to drain the Treasury and drown Florida in a bathtub, and you have a can-t miss sit-com, am I right? Call Larry David.
Or Rodney Dangerfield.
6
More distracted articles and comment while Paul Ryan slithers just beneath the surface...
1
When counting the buttons possessed by someone who believes in "magic underwear," I'd be more cautious.
4
What does Seamus have to say about this?
1
I have a suggestion for the NYT: Whenever Trump says/tweets "My (blank) is bigger than your (blank)", print a small story that Trump says his thing is bigger than (blank's) thing, tell us what "thing" is this time and move on. Regardless of the subject, Trump seems to believe that his "thing" is always bigger, better, bolder than anyone else's. BTW: Look at the size of his thumb in the accompanying photo. TINY!
3
I'd rather trust a man who loved his dog, bad judgement one time-eh!, than a man who never owned one.
1
Trump has more in common with the Korean leader then he thinks..they are both insane.
5
Gail Collins and those like her are still pining for the progressive days of Obama's placating and giving ground to the likes of Kim Jong Ping Pong. KJPP doesn't see diplomatic efforts as a preventative to his maniacal ways. He understands brute force only. Thank God we have a president today willing to let KJPP know in plain terms, "we will not be intimidated by the likes of you."
Let's see - buttons and Mitt Romney. Maybe the button boys could pull down their pants and compare size and the loser could then ride on the top of Romney's car? And have his button taken away.
1
What happened? This was your big chance to "wave the Irish Setter"!
1
Sexual repression at 1600 Pennsylvania?
2
no joke about mitt's roof-riding dog? c'mon, gail!
1
Gail! No mention of Seamus?!?
1
just read a New Yorker article by Louis Menand he refered to trump as a "toxic nitwit" best description i've heard yet
but i digress every republican president in my lifetime has made the previous republican president look better i thought Nixon was the antichrist then came Regan getting his behavioral advise from his wife's astrology readings then came Bush II ( i'll give pop a pass) the puppet of the war mongers in his administration and now we have the toxic nitwit the mind quakes in terror to think of how the repubs will top him.....
2
My button's bigger than yours? What's next: Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah?
2
Credit where credit is due: Trump's idiotic acts are bigger and more frequent than anyone else's.
The liar in chief thinks such stunts deflect us from the real issues. Not true. Simply not true.
2
“Whose dictator-father, according to an official biography, never needed to use a toilet.”
Trump and Kim Jong-un, like his father, can be predictably explosive since they may be literally constipated? Oh, never mind, just vote next November for US sanity.
2
Two dummies in charge of things that go boom. What could go wrong???
2
A 'Breitbart centerfold' - what a thought! And imagining what the Breitbart readers do with such centerfolds!! That will keep me amused for awhile. Thanks Gail!
2
Mitt has all his buttons? Fake news!
1
Trump is not going to start a nuclear war. But he will, and has, destroyed the world's view of the character, reputation and integrity of American Presidents. Kim Jug-un's actions and comments have convinced leaders of every nation that the man is an insane idiot. Trump is unable to understand that his identical actions and comments cause other nations to place him in the same category. It will take decades, if not longer, to restore America's reputation as the leader of the free world.
1
Fab. column, Gail.........I'm so glad you're back, you always make me laugh!
2
Mickey Mouse has TWO big buttons! Top that, trump!
3
Could we get through just one day, that is all I am asking, one day, without a stark reminder, that our country is now being run by a middle schooler---just one day that is all I am asking.
2
Maybe Romney will go for LDS President, now?
2
America - you've got an infant at the helm!
2
Thank you for not mentioning Romney’s dog. For once b
No wonder people voted for Trump. The fact that Romney is looking good now must mean there is a stupidity gene in most Americans. C’mon. Romney will happily turn over for a belly rub from Trump once (if) he’s elected, mark my words. Don’t be fooled by your desperation for escape and comeuppance. Americans are like a flock of birds, to- and fro-ing in the sky towards the next shiny object. Jones! Romney! Bannon! Those whom we don’t know much about (Doug Jones) or those who are known to be evil (Romney, Bannon) take on halos when perceived to have the slightest whiff of being against Trump. Let’s use our brains, folks, not our emotions.
Oh, Gail, but SEAMUS!
1
The presence of this man in the White House will always remain a mystery to be explained time and again. We know that this is a consequence of the arcane electoral system, but enough people voted for him to give him this victory. And on what basis? Certainly not on the evidence that he can present rational policies and capacity to deal with important issues. He has failed in aviation, he has failed in education, he has failed in casino gambling. He is making his money by convincing people to use his name as a come on. Why people think that an often failed braggart wins recognition to their businesses is a mystery, the same mystery that is found in why voters think that he can do something for them.
3
Maybe the USA is in need of a name change?
Chelm comes readily to mind.
2
What about "the 47%"? The insistence that no one goes without needed medical treatment because of emergency rooms? The complete lack of empathy and feeling in the Seamus incident?
What about his racing to make nice with Trump when he thought he might be made Secretary of State?
For me, that means that he will be "principled" only until his ambitions are tweaked. And his poor judgment, lack of empathy, and poor understanding of his fellow Americans will put him squarely in the camp of those who want to cut Social Security.
No, I'm not hopeful about Mitt, and I don't care to watch him fold so fast again. Let him influence people against Trump in some other way than putting him in power.
2
He Likes Big BUTTONS and He Cannot Lie...
It's amazing ( or is it ) how many things that person in the White House has taken credit for and some he doesn't even understand. This nonsense about buttons that don't even exist is pathetic. An overgrown child acting like a bully, something he does very well. I expect one day he'll take credit for the parting of the Red Sea. He's an egotistical maniac and very delusional. Maybe this has all been a nightmare and we will wake up and find we have a sane, intelligent President in the Oval Office instead of this nut job, who has accomplished absolutely nothing except the horrific tax bill and antagonizing our allies. It can't get any worse, or can it.
1
Don’t you mean marbles?
Thanks Gail for not mentioning Sheamus the dog. There's the mad dog in the White House.
None of this is funny anymore. Watching a democratic republic vanish into the shadows of history isn't funny. Nor is accepting the possibility that it might vanish into a nuclear holocaust. There's just nothing left here to laugh about.
6
The era of men with threatening buttons on their desks.
1
Don’t any optimism about Romney in the senate is premature if not misplaced altogether. How many ‘anti-Trump’ GOP senators and leaders, after being humiliated, have to surrender ignominiously to the ‘Big-Button-Bearer’ in the insane asylum, for us to wake up and realize that the GOP has no decency left in it, at long last, no decency left in it.
On the other hand, a puppy-beater does sound worse than someone who would merely strap one to the roof of his car on a cross country drive! Such restraint, Ms. Collins, on your part!
1
Be careful what you wish for us, ,Gail. Mitt Romney is NOT the sweet, slightly thoughtless (poor Seamus) guy that you are now enabling and pushing for. We must do better than Romney-for-Utah's-Senate-Seat. He is an ideologue and can do great harm in that seat......and greater harm should he achieve his dream of the 'really big seat'.
Your conservative bona fides showed in all of the witty articles you produced that softened Trumps image (and enabled him) as he steadily and stealthfully progressed from 'Birther Trump' to 'President Trump'. A politically astute Molly Ivins you are not!
3
Has everybody missed what we really have here? We have is a case of two terribly insecure adolescents trying to top each other by bragging about their manliness: "My (fill in the blank) is bigger than yours!"
It's really scary to think that Trump can make the re-emergence of Mitt Romney sound like a good idea. What's next? The revival of Dan Quayle?
2
Yes, Donald, I am sure you have a big "button" that works just fine (quiet impressive given your age - good for you!), just as you have assured us before that there is "no problem" with the size of your "hands".
"However, it’s perfectly possible his minions put a big, red, make-believe button on his desk to make him feel manly." - can not help but think that this would be a wonderful idea for the Donald as well. They should install it right on his desk and assure him it is even bigger than Obama's button. Isn't it a wonderful image to think of Kim and Donald both mashing red buttons on their respective desks that do absolutely nothing while the grown ups talk?
2
Thank you for the belly laughs! I needed them on a FREEZING COLD day here in Tennessee. I love your column and your humor.
1
Great column, Ms. Collins. The Freudian implications of the button buzz are a wonderful reminder of a tool (Freudian analysis ) that has almost disappeared from our culture. Now this: I learned last night that Trump eats Mc Donal burgers because he fears being poisoned. By whom? Isn't that the way the Russians and North Koreans wipe out defectors? It's a mafia-esque story. You pay them back or you get wiped out. Please, Ms. Collins, do something with those hamburgers. I am considering applying for a job at Mac D in Washington. Which one does the president order from?
3
I really doubt that Trump knows what nuclear weapons are or can do. Since he doesn't read, there is a fairly accurate depiction of a nuclear attack in "Terminator 2." Someone should screen it for him and should add "this will happen to rich people, too. Also look what's happening to all that real estate."
1
What?! No mention of Mitt driving to Canada with his dog on top of the car?! I'm aghast! Appalled. Sooooo disappointed in you Gail. Oh, I'm having an existential crisis of massive proportions.
1
It wasn't very long ago that I thought Mitt was the worst guy in U.S. politics.
2
Just when you thought Donald Trump couldn't come out with more cringe-worthy taunts against Kim Jong-un, he comes out with this.
At this point, it'll be a miracle if any of us get out of this alive.
Of course there's the distinct possiblity that all this is a ruse to keep us from focusing on the outome of the Robert Muelller investigation.
Distraction through smoke and mirrors happens to be something Trump excels at.
But more than likely it's nothing more than just another example of what he does best -- acting stupid.
1
I just keep wondering which part of Trump's anatomy looks like a button. I know I shouldn't, but I do.
3
We all dance around it but Mr. Trump and Mr. Kim are engaged in the taunts of youth arguing about whose nuclear genitalia are bigger. There is little doubt sexuality and genitalia are loaded subjects in part because they carry both pleasure and procreation of the species and our puritanical roots cannot handle this duality.
While nuclear weapons share a visual similarity to a phallus, they are the exact opposite, delivering only pain and destruction of humankind. Strip away the schoolyard bullying and ask the more fundamental question: why do some continue to support a man in the oval office who wants to proclaim how much pain he can cause and how many millions he can kill with the weapons he has at his disposal?
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Gail, profound, but no mention of the dog on top of the car. Are you giving Mitt a pass? Or, did you just forget in all this talk of buttons and, oh, nuclear war?
No column about Mitt is complete without mentioning Seamus. Dogs are people too, my friend...
Mitt Romney thinks that people who have paid into social security their entire lives are takers when they expect the return of their money. Trump is extremely stupid, lazy, delusional, narcissistic, corrupt and numerous other things. Nearly everyone looks good in comparison.
There was that guy in Utah who ran an independent presidential campaign and did surprisingly well opposing Trump. He could beat Romney. This other guy is much younger and seems far more capable. But then, Utah thought Orrin Hatch was a good guy.
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Gail, today's column touches on the return of Mitt Romney. No mention of Seamus?
We have Kim to thank for resurrecting "dotard."
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It might be stressful for Kim to pay for an expensive suite of nuclear,conventional,biological,chemical weapons he can't use without ending his physical existence.By taunts provocations and sanctions continued and increasing,He might make a miscalculation for our exploitation.
Churchill was urging a confrontational approach to Hitler but it fell on deaf ears and a futile attempt to trade security for peace with an absolute dictator yielded neither as Churchill predicted.
Return of Mitt = return of Seamus. Woohoo! Can’t wait.
A crazy old man and a crazy young man, both with bizarre haircuts and intellectual and emotional deficiencies, playing chicken with nuclear weapons. What could possibly go wrong ?
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Love it!
Perhaps your referencing "puppy-beater" hits a little too close to home for Mittens. Remember his caged dog on the roof of his station wagon? The image of the Mittster washing fecal matter from the windshield of his car is awfully prophetic, don't you think?
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What..... no jokes about Mitt's dog? How disappointing,
The SCP and the Mitt, two sides of a coin? Dumb and Dumber? Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee?
It reminds me of Keegan-Michael Key"s Angry Obama, saying things out loud that Obama couldn't say.
The SCP is Mitt's Angry Mitt.
Why are we coronating Mitt Romney? How much of the Presidential vote in Utah did he win in 2016? That's right, 0%. While Evan McMullin won 21%. Does he still live in Utah? Is he still a Mormon? Why is no one talking about him? Has he taken himself out of the race?
This is what you get when you settle for mediocrity. A babbling rich old white guy. America loves it's mediocrity. It is easily seen if you even take a peek...like American cars, American beer, the police state, the military-industrial complex. All mediocre for mediocre people.
Hmmm, puppy-beater vs. the guy who left poor old Seamus on top of the family car? Not a good situation for dog-lovers and folks who believe in animals' rights.
Thank goodness for your columns, Ms. Collins. I thought we'd have to be content with the tête-à-tête, hairdo-a-hairdo between Trump and Kim, but the Bannon-Trump bout has just entered the next round...
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Gail, you neglected to mention that maybe-future-Senator Mitt Romney is the same Mitt Romney "who drove to Canada with a dog strapped to the roof." :)
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Roof! Roof! Roof!
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And initiated expanded access to health care when he was the Governor of Massachusetts!
Oh, fer crying out loud! Let sleeping dogs lie.
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Let me just say that only in the land of cable news and newspaper punditry does anyone care about what Romney, the living embodiment of the 1%, is up to.
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We can only hope that the fingers of both of them are too tiny to depress their respective buttons.
"Suddenly Romney seems like the second coming of — oh, I don’t know, Dwight Eisenhower without the medals?"
No, Romney is the second coming of Romney, a man so venal that he dined with Trump, hoping to be given some crumb of assignment, only to have Trump laugh in his face and throw sand at the 95 pound weakling.
And, then of course, there's that binder full of women....
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What, no mention of the dog on the roof?
I think Trump meant to say, "My bottom's bigger than yours."
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It's no longer funny, pointing out that Kim's and Trump's hair-dos are the worst government leader coifs in history. No longer funny that we Americans have the most demented and narcissistically-compromised president in American history.
The atrocious schoolyard taunts by Trump that "HIS - 'nuclear'(sic) - "button is bigger & more powerful" than the D.P.R.K dear leader's are insane, but written in the Twitterworld along with Instagrams and snapchats in our tragic social-media age. Mitt Romney is not the Lone Ranger, riding to save Americans from their mentally ill President by becoming Utah's senator, replacing Orrin Hatch who is toast today. Hatch is 83. Trump will be 72 this year, Mitt is 71 in 8 weeks. These are elderly white Kemosabes ("quien no sabe"), no Tontos in sight.
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If the political parties were normal, the fact that Mitt Romney and even W look good by comparison to the current GOP standard bearer would give the Republicans pause. And the Democrats should take note, too, especially for 2018 and 2020 - after all, it took the wimpy centrist ineptitude of Jimmy Carter to make Ronald Reagan look good, and Barack Obama is a Reagan admirer. What a nutty country - by all rights, we SHOULD have nutty politicians. But the rest of the world deserves better.
Love the "Breitbart centerfold!" Ha!
I wish you hadn't mentioned that an Obama appointee runs the FAA. This will likely prompt President Bone Spurs to replace him or her with a Republican who's aviation experience is limited to making paper airplanes.
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So, DJT is giving KJU the "Little Marco" treatment. It worked before. I bet it works again.
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How many people trust Kim right now more than Trump?
who would ever have thought George Romney would look so good!?
how about who would ever have thought George w bush would look so good?!
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I am willing to be strapped to the roof of Romney’s car if it will get rid of Trump.
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Considering the state of US politics, we have humor to help keep us sane.
I am reminded of Gemli's comment about Carson "He could get stuck on an escalator". Trump appears to have that ability as well. There is little that he does that makes any sense. So, how do we account for polls that show Trump's popularity holding at roughly 35%, sometimes as low as 34%.
Does that mean that 34% of Americans are liars, thieves, and racists? Yep, I think so - and his enablers in congress are just as demented. The fact that Trump's world view is shaped by Murdoch and Fox News is also disturbing. If you waste a few minutes watching Fox you will come away with a horrible taste in your mouth.
I turn to Gail for some relief.
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In the words of Jimmy Buffett, "We have a lot to drink about."
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No mention of Seamus!
Please tell we that the "BIG" button is impossible to push with tiny hands!
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There here is an unhappy dog in this op-ed; but it’s the other guy’s dog. We therefore must ask whether, where Romney is concerned, Gail has switched sides.
I, too, was pleased to hear that Mitt may be back. While he may be smug, arrogant and clueless, he is not stupid or crazy. Nor is he an American gothic Dracula, a/k/a Paul “Ayn Rand” Ryan. Anyone with a working brain who does not drink human blood looks pretty good right now.
The bar in the Trump GOP era is low, people -very, very low.
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I know why Trump has his thumb up in front of him like that. He need something to focus on ahead of him so that he can walk a straight line. Plus, he can cover all sorts of large objects with his thumb at that distance. Makes his hands seem really big!
Unbelievable -no mention of Seamus!!
You know you’ve hit the bottom when we have a cartoon President-figure whose Chief of Staff is someone he says he barely remembers and whose idea of leadership is “tweeting” about his biggie red button.
This story and the one about the Chinese disrupting village life in Africa by stealing and killing donkeys for the gelatin in their hides resulting in people’s inability to get water is telling us that our species is lethally crazy. “Pathetic”is too kind a word.
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Gail, We all know which body part they are comparing, and it must be very tiny to be causing such bluster.
Button, button, whose got the button...
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Oh I hope Mitt runs and wins in Utah. Then we'll have a US senator --a Re[publican--who has denounced Trump as a con man and a fraud. I predict smooth passage of a lot of legislation put forward by El Magnifico.
If Trump learns that the current FAA chief is an Obama appointee, that chief is toast. And why does no one seem to realize (except, ahem, me) that Andrew Cuomo is going to run in 2020?
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I can picture the Romney -Trump debate during the primaries now. Trump will brag he's had 3 wives. And Romney, as have other members of the Mormon faith, will go out and marry three other women so he can tell Trump:"Yeah, but did you have them all at the same time?" Game, set, match to Mr. Romney.
I've missed your columns! Welcome back!
I was not struck by an errant meteor in 2017. An historic accomplishment. Never been done before. Hail Trump!
But seriously, folks. Most people who indulge in similar magical thinking are being medicated against their will and living in secure psychiatric wards. After reading the dueling 'statements of Messrs. Bannon and Trump over the past few days, perhaps that's what the White House has become.
If so, someone should remind Nurse KellyAnne that it's way past time for 'President Trump' to take his next dose of thorazine.
What about Seamus?
"Suddenly Romney seems like the second coming of — oh, I don’t know, Dwight Eisenhower without the medals?"
Are you kidding? Compared to the man/child he's more like Pericles!
ps -You forgot to mention Seamus. Is he still alive?
We used to laugh at Joe Isuzu. Now he is our President.
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After all, it's true that our button IS bigger then theirs.
Rocket man only understands that simple talk so Trump plays back at him. MUCH more effective than Obama.
They're willing to negotiate all of a sudden........can't deny those results!
Trump 1/ Obama 0
They’re willing to negotiate all of a sudden? With whom? South Korea? About what? The Olympics? Please. Trump is still 0.
Aparently the private schools Trump attended didn’t have to do duck & cover or drills where we went out in the hall and sat against the wall. All the silly nonsense designed to make us less afraid of nuclear war. An opinionated spoiled rich mans brat then & the same now. Ain’t Trump a card :(
Bill Clinton's policy of giving NK what it wanted in exchange for lies about what it was going to (not) do did not work.
George Bush's policy of hunting down one tyrant who claimed to have WMD and seeing him hanged, while letting another tyrant genuinely give up his WMD program, repent, and live the good life was starting to have an effect, but not completely.
Barack Obama's policy of getting that repentant tyrant without WMD killed and dragged through the streets did worse than nothing. It rapidly accelerated NK's nuke program.
Maybe Trump's policy of trading bully insults might work. It can't be any worse than what Obama did. (I kind of believe Trump's button really is bigger than little rocket man's).
Hey, I watch American Idol all the time on Youtube, not so the dog torturer.
I thought he said, "belly". Now, "belly" might be a real debate, but button? I don't know. Hard to know how big Kim's button is from the cut of his jackets.
I was disappointed there no mention of the dog on top of the car. I expected better from Gail.
It's really a children's game. "My brother is stronger than yours." "My button is bigger than yours." At least, they're equals as far as mouth size is concerned.
Remember "ping pong diplomacy"? I believe the leaders of the US and North Korea should bring in the new year with a haircut exchange. You can't understand someone until you've walked a mile in their coiff.
"Romney versus a far-right puppy-beater"?? That could be a disturbing senate race: Mittens, the roof-top dog slayer vs Bannon's puppy-bashing bozo. But, why digress about Mittens on the menu?
Our plate of self-served troubles is currently overflowing. In fact, spilling onto the table and floor. We have a dish of horror piled so high that the table's legs shake, causing its thick orange coating of lunacy to undulate like jello. We don't need to add a serving of Romney to the mess.
As absurd as our situation is, we must not forget that it is of our own making. We allowed rodents to infest our democracy kitchen. Our social media "geniuses" all but gave an invitation to Putin to play with the controls on our election oven. The Republican chefs were openly spicing our traditional social, political and cultural dishes with a medley of deadly poisons. Tens of millions of Americans were gobbling down the conspiracy appetizers cooked up by hate-filled conservative c(r)ooks who filled our kitchen with foul odors and rancid ingredients. Tens of millions of other Americans took it for granite that the kitchen was properly inspected and safe, so they sat out elections and enabled the Rodent Party to control and turn Congress into a sewer of greed and special interests.
Trump is merely the deadly concoction of our own neglect. What should we expect when we, as a people, are not willing to act responsibly, don't respect, don't deserve the gift our Founding Fathers bequeathed?
"Dotard One to Rocketman...my button is bigger and better than yours...Do you copy?" would have been a incomprehensible concept in days past when there were real presidents.
Equally confounding is exhuming failed candidate Mitt, wearing a "Make America Romney Again" hat. For those forgetting his campaigns, try to recall his effective repudiation of his heartfelt Never Trump, and best speech. He should skip the frogs' legs in the future.
I knew the media meltdown would be glorious. It’s like watching children. Don’t you understand, young ones? Don’t you see what Trump is doing? He’s negotiating. He weakening his opponent (KJU) by belittling him and getting into his head. But go on..keep thinking he’s mentally ill. He’ll keep winning.
Where's the mention of the dog?
I woke up early this morning to the rattle of a +4.0 earthquake.
The geological fault buttons arise and are felt by many which may cause destruction. That is an an unprovoked act of nature.
Let’s hope the nuclear football does not travel with Trump. That it should have a Schlesinger-Kissinger safety interlock.
Trump punting that football is the provoked act of a player whose cranial contusions have addled his noggin.
Trump is America’s Corvair with his lacquered swept back burnt Cheerios fins. Unsafe at any speed!
Remember the scene in Chaplin’s The Great Dictator, where he and Mussolini were chatting in barber chairs and trying to gain height advantage by cranking them up? First one, then the other, back and forth. Such is the public face of our strategic foreign policy regarding NK. “Oh yeah, well my button is THIS big, and if you don’t shut up I’m going to push it!” “Oh yeah, well I’ll push mine TWICE and UNFRIEND YOU!! First, NK could reach Guam with an ICBM, then the west coast, then the east coast. Since I live on the west coast, soon moving to a likely metropolitan target, I would appreciate it if Twitter would voluntarily reduce the characters to 8. Then we could all tweet “Shut up!” and see what happens. In a nuclear and terrorist world, using blunt, off-the-cuff language is risky, especially if you’re a geo-political novice. You might be “right”, but you might be opening Pandora’s box of dangerous reaction. Recently, German Foreign Minister Sigmar Gabriel said that relations between the US and Germany “will never be the same” even after Trump’s time in office. If the US citizenry could make such a disastrous choice once, could it happen again? With difficulty, I am learning to live with PTSD (President Trump Stress Disorder). Gail, your columns are part of my therapy.
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I have a big red button on my desk, too. It says ‘EASY’.
But Donald Trump has already told us his job isn’t, as in, "Nobody knew health care could be so complicated." The man agonizes over so many complicated problems, like how to squeeze in an extra 18 holes when a bunch of annoying government people are trying to get him to sign something he can’t read. It’s a tough life, what with worrying about finger size and who’s tattling on you and how many made-in-China hats you’ve sold and whether you hair will blow off. I really pity the guy.
But I pity our country more. Donald Trump has worked tirelessly to create every one of his own problems, except maybe the stumpy thumbs. He’s a cheating, lying, back-stabber with no real talent except self-promotion. The USA is full of fine people, and deserves much, much better.
And you’re right, Gail. Mitt Romney is looking pretty good these days. But face it. You don’t have to try very hard to look better than Donald Trump, the egomaniacal fool with an entire country strapped on his roof.
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I wish you hadn't mentioned that the head of the FAA is an Obama appointee. Now he/she will probably be replaced by a buxom high school graduate who works in housekeeping in one of his hotels...but really likes to fly.
The simple male mind makes much about an organ that is situated in the opposite side of the torso. As a male of my species, I am well aware of the attraction of attention, and have to say this is the stupidest attraction of attention to such a piece of flesh I have seen. We generally consider it impolite or stupid to make such a fuss, and also generally consider that those who make such a fuss to be probably deficient in that endowment, though, out of politeness, refrain from making such a claim. Based on the reporting I have recently read, this guy, man, realizes he is not up to the job Mr. Putin put him in, and is going crazy, while Mr. Putin is laughing very loudly.
There is no doubt that Mitt knows better dog tricks than the president, and that fact alone makes him a more qualified candidate than Trump for any office.
So, welcome back Mitt, and lets hope that the current president never, ever, gets a dog.
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The dog's named is Pence and he has not yet been transported on a car roof.
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No welcome to Mitt, but I'm totally with you on protecting all dogs from the Orange One.
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Or leaves it on the roof of his car while traveling.
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"My button is bigger than yours". This presidency has become a challenge for comedians and satirists. There is no way to take a comment as crazy as that and go anywhere that is funny.
Trump and Kim have now entered cage match territory, unfortunately without a cage to protect the rest of us. It might even be entertaining to watch this at times, caring not if they destroy each other. But in this particular game of real-politik, there is no cage to contain their rage, and the arena in which they play is our own neighborhood. Let that sink in.
We cannot afford to be entertained. Whether one's button is bigger than the other's is not the point. Emotional maturity is what matters most. By that measure, they both fail, and we should be scared. Very, very scared. Bigly. Unlike Donald Trump's hands.
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It is too easy to make fun of these two guys. What they really need is someone willing to bolster their fragile egos. That would truly make us all safer.
Obama painted a patina of grace, elegance, decency, and basic humanity onto the White House and the presidency. So the difference between his efforts and those of the current occupant which can find no low, makes one weep for what was. There are no novel descriptions left to use to drive the point home that Mr. Trump is a walking demented, disaster. The new book by Mr. Wolf validates what has been circulating by the cognoscenti for months. It is time to examine those who continue to defend Mr. Trump and remember who they are so that when the time comes they will have to pay the piper and face their own greed and lack of integrity. We will remember and won't let them slide long after Trump has imploded. And we will need you, Gail, to use your humor to keep those people out front.
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There is a local paper in Boston that has been keeping a Mitt Watch for a few years. You never know what Romney will support, or not--as when he attacked Romneycare in MA. He's well known for his opportunism. He may very well end up being more Trumpist than Hatch, if that proves convenient. He tried to ingratiate during the transition when there was a chance at State Department.
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Trump’s claim about having a bigger nuclear button than Kim is particularly ironic since the DoD was forced to spend millions on a crash program to downsize our nuclear button to accommodate the President’s small hands.
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I think President Trump has shown great growth in office this past year. After all, comments about missile size are usually the purview of teenage males, whereas his usual retorts during the campaign (I know you are, but what am I?) were more likely used by 7 year olds. So much growth since "I'm not a puppet, you're the puppet."
That Romney is being touted asa senatorial "second coming" is a measure of how low our political scene has fallen. Perhaps he does have better hair and can talk with degree of clarity, but many of his ideas are not that different from those being shove down our throats.
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Romney is so bland he makes an ecru wall an acid trip psychedelic mural by comparison. If Mitt ran against Trump and won, at least we could take a deep breath and get some much needed sleep.
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Things not bad enough, now Mitt to the rescue. "Where have you gone Joe DiMaggio?"
I have a very "modest proposal" to resolving this button size dispute.
These two obese bloviating inherited wealth and power bullying buffoons should settle this matter like old-fashioned honorable gentleman by a duel to the death binding both nations. Neither "boy" has ever been in real playground or street fight nor worn their national military uniform in harms way.
Mr.Trump can be trained by his buddy Mr. Putin. Mr. Kim can turn to his friend Mr. Xi. The duel should televised worldwide on pay TV.
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"Trump responded that he had a nuclear button, too, and “it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his . . ." Those of us who read 'Dilbert' are familiar with this behavior from the ever-boastful Topper. I didn't realize Topper lived at 1600 PA AVE.
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Maybe Romney believes that the "47%" will forget his disparaging remarks about them and vote for him when he runs for President in 2020.
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But the two have so much in common: narcissism, inherited wealth, draft dodging and a sense of entitlement.
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Oh, I almost forgot: Mitt Romney. Yeah, the Senate seat is his if he wants it. Most of Utah isn't so much excited for Romney though as relieved Orrin Hatch is finally leaving. A Romney announcement would certainly meet with celebration in some corners. However, you could run a spaghetti squash against Hatch right now and Utahans would throw a party. That's how low his popularity has sunk. Romney would actually be doing Republicans a favor by clearing out a messy nomination process.
As for for Utah as a super red state, that statement is only partially true. We're actually split three ways. You have the deep red libertarian streak occupying one third. Mormons occupy another. Everyone else is generally left leaning or extreme left. You won't notice that in election results though because the state is extremely gerrymandered. One thing is for sure though: two-thirds of Utah doesn't like Trump. I leave you to guess which two. That's the main reason Mitt is a shoe-in if he runs.
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The button on trump's desk comes from Staples (remember those ads for how easy it is to shop there). When he pushes it, North Korea will be obliterated and then he will hear the tag line "That was easy."
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It is important that our relative power is made clear. North Korea is more of a cult than a country. With only 25 million people it has no hope of ever becoming a serious world power. Yet they build a bomb, and build a missile to deliver it. John F. Kennedy drew a red line around Cuba. Who wished that he had not done so even though it was frightening at the time. One thing that is not debatable is that U.S. policy toward North Korea prior to Trump failed to prevent this warped tiny country from developing nuclear weapons. So maybe Trumps critics should show some humility.
Gail Collins is the best thing since the unfortunate loss of Molly Ivins. She has the wit and the highly developed sense of absurdity, but not the bite. Two out of three ain't bad.
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When Trump compares his button to Kim’s, he is talking about the size of buttons relative to hands. Trump’s button only looks large to him because his hands are so small.
(SNL - this HAS to lead to a skit!).
So this is what US leadership has sunken to. Sad.
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An NYT reader yesterday mentioned that Trump's button just looks big because his hands are so small.
It's very comforting to see that so many of my fellow Americans have such a great sense of humor, especially since I may end up huddled in a basement with some of you.
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The real question is:
IF Mitt Romney wins a senate seat and IF Mitt runs against against Trump in a primary and IF he wins and becomes president...will he drive his family from Utah to DC in one of his cars from his underground garage with his dog tied to the top?
The only reason Rex Tillerson hangs on as Secretary of State is that Trump couldn't get his top choice for a replacement. Don Rickles passed away last April.
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Now why did you have to go and write that the FAA is run by an Obama appointee? If Trump finds out a good person is out of a job. And will be replaced by someone who thinks that if God intended man to fly, He would have given us wings.
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Reboot Romney, good one! But will his operating system updates be doggie friendly, and have they removed his "Corporations are people too" glitch?
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Kim's father never using the bathroom is no surprise, neither do our politicians, hence the reason why they are so full of themselves.
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I see trump has slapped a cease and desist lawsuit on bannon on his global best seller. Like he really cares. I doubt that violating his confidentiality agreement is going to cut it. He can print the book in any country even Mexico. Unless trump puts a FATWA on him like Salmaan Rushdie.
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I am deeply disappointed in this editorial. Gail wrote about Mitt with no mention of our favorite dog, Seamus!
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"Who would ever have thought that Mitt Romney could look that good?"
Frightening comment Gail. Mitt Romney is the guy who in 2012 lost the presidential election, but won Yale Law school quote of the year;
Mitt Romney, “47 percent,” May 17 2012
“There are 47 percent of the people who will vote for the president no matter what … who are dependent upon government, who believe that they are victims. … These are people who pay no income tax. … and so my job is not to worry about those people. I’ll never convince them that they should take personal responsibility and care for their lives.”
I guess 'the devil you know is better than the one you don't know'
2018 elections can not come soon enough.
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And Romney paradoxically brought Massachusetts the forerunner to Obamacare which worked quite well and helped many in that 47%. And interestingly, a good chunk of that “47%” are the very same “deplorables” that Hillary Clinton talked about.
Yet another danger of having a Bomb Cyclone "leading" the country is that a dog abusing, vacant eyed smiling, empty suit starts to look good to you. We should all be out in the streets.
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Careful what you ask for... look at the break down on who voted for Moore, include the write-ins. If this is a turning tide, it is a neap tide.