When I was a 14-year-old student in Chicago's Leo High School in 1950 I got a graphic lesson in how to control adolescents. One of the other freshman that first day in class was making a nuisance of himself by laughing and joking with other students while the Irish Christian Brother was taking roll. So the Brother faced the young lad and asked him his name. The student smiled and asked the class: "Should I tell him boys?" Before "boys" completely left his lips the Brother had belted him with a right cross and the kid hit the floor. The Brother, an amateur boxer in his native Ireland, then looked down at the startled student and asked: "Now what did you say your name was lad?" From that point on in the Brother's class you could hear a feather fall when the Brother wasn't teaching. How times have changed. If the Brother did that today, he would be arrested and be facing a million-dollar lawsuit from the angry parents. Pity.
2
Sheer brutal ignorance. That, and molestation, are some of the notable highlights of Catholic schools
14
A fine organization:
http://m.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/thousands-raped-in-irelands-christi...
http://m.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/thousands-raped-in-irelands-christi...
5
I remember very well when brutal behavior toward children was the norm. The "Brother" could have killed the student. He certainly should not have been in charge of adolescents, and the school should have been sued. Do you really imagine that was how teenagers should be taught good behavior and manners?
8
I shudder at the word 'adolescent': it means 'to suffer from' as if growing up were a disease.
Read Mandela's autobiography to get a sense of what growing up was like before adolescence had taken over growing up. At puberty, boys & girls were separated and received instruction. Girls became child-bearing women (now it would be women 'allowed' to love). Boys underwent circumcision in the presence of the males. A lot of noise was used to camouflage the pain. But when the sharp rock descended on the individual's flesh every eye was fixed on him. Would he flinch? These, after all, were warriors and one day might have to face not just a spear, but a lion.
And that was it. Six months of instruction culminating in a dramatic ceremony of manhood demonstrating the capacity to face and endure pain unflinchingly. And you join the men.
Not ten years of being psycho-biologically a man but defined socially as a boy; or a woman defined as a girl, being dependant, sometimes feeling you have to negotiate the very air you breathe. And going haywire.
And then the specialists kick in and we have a science of adolescence, a science of how to consider growing up a disease.
We do not know how people would behave if they were allowed to mature naturally. Maybe the risk-taking impulse comes from being mis-defined as a child.
FInally, if we want the educational system to ever function without coercion (as is the present case) then we need to coordinate education with growing up; and some work,
Read Mandela's autobiography to get a sense of what growing up was like before adolescence had taken over growing up. At puberty, boys & girls were separated and received instruction. Girls became child-bearing women (now it would be women 'allowed' to love). Boys underwent circumcision in the presence of the males. A lot of noise was used to camouflage the pain. But when the sharp rock descended on the individual's flesh every eye was fixed on him. Would he flinch? These, after all, were warriors and one day might have to face not just a spear, but a lion.
And that was it. Six months of instruction culminating in a dramatic ceremony of manhood demonstrating the capacity to face and endure pain unflinchingly. And you join the men.
Not ten years of being psycho-biologically a man but defined socially as a boy; or a woman defined as a girl, being dependant, sometimes feeling you have to negotiate the very air you breathe. And going haywire.
And then the specialists kick in and we have a science of adolescence, a science of how to consider growing up a disease.
We do not know how people would behave if they were allowed to mature naturally. Maybe the risk-taking impulse comes from being mis-defined as a child.
FInally, if we want the educational system to ever function without coercion (as is the present case) then we need to coordinate education with growing up; and some work,
1
I am surprised at the number of people who did not get the point of this article. Teenagers kissing in the car is not reckless; having unprotected sex (opportunity and temptation)*is*reckless
5
Studies have shown that teens are more apt to engage in risk-taking activities (no using a bicycle helmet, not using a seatbelt, riding with a drunk driver, drinking and driving, texting while driving) when they are sleep deprived. Studies also show that most teens are chronically sleep deprived due to the fact that there is circadian rhythm shift when they hit adolescence making them biologically designed to go to bed later and sleep later. Too early school start times interfere with teen sleep biology. One way to help teens not engage in harmful risk-taking would be to make sure they get the sleep they need. #startschoollater
10
Our society tends to babysit kids until they are in middle school, and they get no practice at independence in their early, non-hormone-driven years. Then they go off the rails in their teens with the newly found freedom.
Early independence (with a good degree of parental involvement) is exceedingly important for making sound decisions in the teen years.
Early independence (with a good degree of parental involvement) is exceedingly important for making sound decisions in the teen years.
15
Prudish examples, maybe. A sleepover with a joint in a safe place isn't the same as getting in the car with a drunk driver. Seems like keeping it real is probably helpful.
3
It's prudish if you think it's OK to have a 15-year-old pothead.
5
The Mid- and Northern European question is - why does one teenager turn into a pothead, whereas the other tries it just once, and loses interest.. there must be something similar at play, ie some of them already learnt self-control.
1
DJ, I think 15yr old experimenting a joint is NOT a 'pothead'!
1
This is an interesting and useful article, but the accompanying photo seems disconnected from the title. Two young people kissing in a car (which appears to be parked) is not dumb or reckless; it's fun and natural. I hope everyone reading this article experiences the rush of not being able to wait one more minute before leaping into a make-out session!! I've done this a couple of times in the past few months and I am in my 40s!
9
Bless you, "Golf Widow." Too true!
3
I assume you have safe sex.
This article is talking about opportunity and temptation, which is provided when two teenagers are making out in a car
This article is talking about opportunity and temptation, which is provided when two teenagers are making out in a car
2
Clearly you haven't met my kids. Hearing me say the same thing a hundred times doesn't change a thing. All of the hard lessons they have learned they have had to learn themselves. And I have the grey hairs and wrinkles as proof!
8
In a society where child rearing is disrespected and where women - or men - who take time off to provide loving supervision, are passed up for career advancements, it is no wonder that American teenagers engage in dangerous risk taking. How can we create a culture of reason when the almighty dollar is more important than child care, health care, or education?
9
This is sound advice for parents. No one said that being a parent is easy...sometimes we have to say no or limit their freedom to keep teenagers safe.
My 17 year old daughter is smart academically but doesn't always have good judgment and is very impulsive. She gets a kick out of risk-taking. For this reason, she will not learn to drive until 18 and probably will not have a car until she is 20 or 21.
All of her friends took Drivers Ed and got driver's licenses at 16. But I know she's not ready. There's not only the real chance she could injure herself, but what about others on the road?
The bottom line is we have to be their parent before their 'friend'.
My 17 year old daughter is smart academically but doesn't always have good judgment and is very impulsive. She gets a kick out of risk-taking. For this reason, she will not learn to drive until 18 and probably will not have a car until she is 20 or 21.
All of her friends took Drivers Ed and got driver's licenses at 16. But I know she's not ready. There's not only the real chance she could injure herself, but what about others on the road?
The bottom line is we have to be their parent before their 'friend'.
23
The picture of two teenagers kissing or suggestion in the story about the horrors of teens smoking pot during a sleepover highlights that this is an effort to promulgate the regressive values of the morality police under the popular guise of pseudoscience.
7
Michael's comments are a gross distortion of what these researchers are saying. They are not trying to be morality police, only to isolate what strategies are helpful to teenagers (and parents) to navigate risky situations as they arise. It is perfectly legit to suggest that teenagers and parents will face situations they don't anticipate. And also legit to suggest that kids have a plan when facing the unknown or situations they didn't anticipate. Finally, I used to work in a prison. Almost universally inmates had an extreme amount of freedom from a young age. It didn't go well for them or for us
9
The authors don't generally supply the graphics for a story like this. The paper uses a stock photo to attract readers.
1
You should do some research on marijuana use and what it does to a developing brain. The earlier kids start the more impact it has on their brains. Also look at the science on psychosis risk and early marijuana use. Marijuana use in teens is much riskier than adults.
1
The crazy things I did when I was 19 are the best memories of my life. Let the kids be kids, not mindless robots following your version of normal or "moral behaviour.
7
In the summer of 1967 I came home on leave only to learn that my prom date from 1964 was killed in automobile accident. She and a group of kids were joy riding and just fooling around, not paying attention, and suddenly they were gone. Judi was the prettiest red-headed girl in the band. She was my friend and classmate since junior high. I miss her terribly. I wish I had been there to tell her to be careful and not to go.
I'm 69 now and the prom is a long time ago. Sadly and tragically there is no telling teenagers about reckless behavior. They just can't hear us. I often think of Judi and our time together in the band. I wish...I wish...I wish...maybe I'll see her in heaven.
I'm 69 now and the prom is a long time ago. Sadly and tragically there is no telling teenagers about reckless behavior. They just can't hear us. I often think of Judi and our time together in the band. I wish...I wish...I wish...maybe I'll see her in heaven.
27
the point here of adults helping set limits is an important one. As the authors point out the graduated licensing for young drivers is a good example. I know from experience with my teenagers that there were very strict limits in the early teen years that I tapered with time towards the time they headed to college. The group dates became individual dates, the you can't be at someones house without a parent around by senior year became let me know where you are. The hard part for me was discovering that the weakest link in the chain during the really dangerous 14-16 year range was the least engaged parent
17
Super informative and helpful. Thank you.
6
This is a great article.
6
My first reaction: 2 teenagers kissing in a car, at least one of them seemingly old enough to drive, does not constitute 'recklessness'. This is what they do. I did it. I assume my kids, at some point in their lives, did it. We all survived long enough to tell the tale.
12
I don't quibbler with anything in the article. However, I would like to point out the America is not the United States as suggested in the article by its reference to your in "America" as opposed to Argentine youth. And, of course, Argentina is not America. However, what the United States and Argentina have in common is that both countries are in America. Let us not be ethnocentric and suggest that only people in the United States are Americans. This has irked me since i lived in Argentina when i was young and, when i was asked where I came from and I said America and was told by an Argentine of about my own age of 10, that he too was from America. This idea of self-righteousness is part of our entire lexicon and i think that it is up to writes to be more specific about what and who they arej writing about and maybe we can change this. And, i am willing and able to debate anyone on this matter!
2
Sorry, "Henry Silvert," but "America" has for quite some time been the correct shorthand way to refer to the United States when using English, Whether British, American, or another variety of the language. No offense is included in nor meant by this, and of course using "America" to mean the U.S. by no means diminishes the meaning of other place names, such as South America, Central America, and so on. But Americans simply call the country "America." If Argentina were such a mouthful, maybe folks there would use something shorter, too. So please have pity, and be less picky. And just pray the US doesn't change it name to Trumpistan!!
7
Only tell a teen something six times? Thank goodness, pre-teens need at least a hundred.
8
say the same thing six times before it works? How about 600 times?
14
I got a real kick out of this!
"For teenagers to find trouble, temptation must meet opportunity"
Duh!
Kids, especially teenagers, take risks, explore, test boundaries, test their parents and teachers and push right up to the edge of the line of acceptable behavior. Sometimes they cross over. And we're surprised to learn this?
I'm 69 now. My teenage years are long behind me. But, I clearly remember being a very, very rambunctious teenager. Growing up in the 60s was no different than today. We didn't have the Internet and cell phones but we had a new freedom that our parents, who were children of the Great Depression and veterans of WWII and Korea, never had. We had automobiles! We had phones in our room! We had television! Some of us had ham radio. And we experienced with our parents, a booming economy. We also were becoming aware of a wider and more dangerous world as TV brought us the war in Vietnam every night on the news. The civil rights movement was in full bloom too. There was also a sexual revolution that really increased high risk behavior. We must remember too that alcohol was readily available and drugs were coming on line too. We didn't have the gun violence but guns, and hunting especially in distant suburbs and rural areas was the norm not the exception. Drag racing and cruising up and the down "the strip" was another risky behavior.
There's nothing new in this little report. We should not be surprised or dismayed. Teenagers will be teenagers. Always.
"For teenagers to find trouble, temptation must meet opportunity"
Duh!
Kids, especially teenagers, take risks, explore, test boundaries, test their parents and teachers and push right up to the edge of the line of acceptable behavior. Sometimes they cross over. And we're surprised to learn this?
I'm 69 now. My teenage years are long behind me. But, I clearly remember being a very, very rambunctious teenager. Growing up in the 60s was no different than today. We didn't have the Internet and cell phones but we had a new freedom that our parents, who were children of the Great Depression and veterans of WWII and Korea, never had. We had automobiles! We had phones in our room! We had television! Some of us had ham radio. And we experienced with our parents, a booming economy. We also were becoming aware of a wider and more dangerous world as TV brought us the war in Vietnam every night on the news. The civil rights movement was in full bloom too. There was also a sexual revolution that really increased high risk behavior. We must remember too that alcohol was readily available and drugs were coming on line too. We didn't have the gun violence but guns, and hunting especially in distant suburbs and rural areas was the norm not the exception. Drag racing and cruising up and the down "the strip" was another risky behavior.
There's nothing new in this little report. We should not be surprised or dismayed. Teenagers will be teenagers. Always.
4
Reckless? Dumb? Foolish? Two teenager kissing in a car? This is a sadly remote time for me, but it is still one of my best memories! Please morality police, live it alone!
12
Oh come on. What exactly did you want them to show instead? The deed that this photo is an euphemism for? Full frontal of the kids having unprotected sex, with a close-up so you can see they aren't using a condom? Or maybe you'd prefer the mangled bodies of the kids after they crashed their car? Or somebody passed out in a pool of their own vomit after a binge drinking party? This is still a newspaper, and one that maintains a certain level of class. Their pictures need to reflect that. It's not facebook (and even facebook has a decency filter).
5
When I was in high school (a very long time ago) my buddy who I double dated with once or twice was with his girlfriend early in the morning turning left to climb a hill near his home. Four other teens were "having fun" crested the hill at extreme speed colliding into my friends little Beetle Bug killing him and placing his girlfriend in intensive care for 6 weeks. A group of other friends and I attended the services and stayed momentarily after the service but I had the distinct feeling his parents in their agony did not distinguish us from the 4 in the car so we quickly left. My friends picture (at 17) is still on our high school website as he never had a chance to get grey and cranky like me. So yes, it's frustrating, but it may well be worth it to tell your teen 6 times.
24
yep - in my country town a popular boy went joyriding, overtook on a gravel verge, spun, rolled and was killed - at 16.
so that was my lesson in life can be short - until I similarly rolled a car on a dirt road and ended up handing upside down from my seatbelt - unhurt - at 19.
we tend to need to learn from our own experience, etc.
so that was my lesson in life can be short - until I similarly rolled a car on a dirt road and ended up handing upside down from my seatbelt - unhurt - at 19.
we tend to need to learn from our own experience, etc.
2