It's almost perfect except for: "I didn’t like hanging with most members of the House when I could tell ’em what to do. You think I’m going to come up here and beg those goofballs for stuff?” The thought inverts causation. It should have read "Although I didn’t like hanging with most members of the House when I could tell ’em what to do, now I wield the checkbook as a lobbyist and those goofballs are finally going to have to heel, to mix a metaphor or two."
16
Finding your rants less and less interesting
15
He's got to be the happiest man in America -- he's released himself.
22
Best piece of contemporary political history I've read in a long time.
27
Oh, God. Another one of Maureen's forays into fiction. Spare us. She's about as funny as a comedy show on NPR.
17
Funny stuff today, Maureen. And, I suspect, not far from the truth.
34
Sorry Maureen, your lame attempt at coming across as Hunter S. Thompson or Dave Barry bombed.
26
So glad to hear he smokes.
10
Another dead on arrival dud from Dowd.
24
Let's go easy on the Kevin McCarthy Bengazi misstatement. Well, actually, it wasn't a misstatement, but... If we keep bringing up the fact that he made a serious tactical blunder there, plus replaying clips of him fracturing the English language badly enough to make George Bush sound like Demosthenes, he'll never get elected Speaker of the House. Let's not lose sight of the goal.
38
As 3rd in line to the presidency, Speaker Boehner was always a disaster. Such a high position in our government should not be completely partisan like he was. The fact that he was not a "rabid" conservative but just a partisan conservative is not okay and should not be okay. He was part of the problem of our paralyzed government. He should be held to account. By the way, please leave the comedic writing to Gail Collins!
58
I know. After he cleans out the barn, let's put on a show.
26
very nice. except Boehner is one of the rats who stunk up the place back in the good old days. isn't he the chump who handed out lobbyist bribery checks to members--on the House floor?
20
Maureen, it would be helpful if Boehner could clean out the barn before his trip to the pasture. But it's up to the voters to muck out the stalls of Congress.
The difference between mucking out a real barn and mucking out the Capitol is the product of one is beneficial to the land, the other is toxic waste.
The difference between mucking out a real barn and mucking out the Capitol is the product of one is beneficial to the land, the other is toxic waste.
27
Boehner was driving the garbage truck and was just a complicit as the rest of the party establishment in courting the tea party in order to gain a majority. In the end it was the rats in the truck that got him, he had already put up wit the stench for yeas.
30
Thanks to Maureen, I finally figured out what's wrong with the entire Republican Party. It's filled with Slytherin Death-Eaters loyal only to Lord Voldemort.
18
Mo you are getting corny. Go find your usual wit.
5
Ms. Dowd,
is your column wistful commentary from Mr. Boehner or what you thought he might say?
I would prefer the former.
is your column wistful commentary from Mr. Boehner or what you thought he might say?
I would prefer the former.
2
From Romney standing on the backs of 4 Americans dead in Benghazi to try to bolster his dismal, disingenuous campaign, to his junior Mormon partner Chaffetz opening the Benghazi show trials, to second stringer Harold Watson Gowdy extending the Republican show trials, to hapless McCarthy telling the truth --- that the Benghazi show trials are just more McCarthy-type poltical witch hunts, the Republican party has shown itself is does desperately need complete outsiders to run it.
31
EVERYTHING is not satisfactual. To begin with, Boehner was badly off-key in his butchering of a cute Walt Disney song. Whoever thought that a Disney hit could become the song of the South? Uh, I meant song of the House! During your tenure as Speaker, John, you did neither good nor well. Getting the GOP extremists to realize that they've been elected to do adult jobs instead of indulging themselves in a creative and unending series of infantile tactics. Primary among them--tantrums and threats. Didn't work for the last group that tried it. How's it working for you guys?
Enjoy your retirement, John. I hear that Disney's going to stage a musical on Broadway based on--that's right, you got it--Zippa dee doo dah. They're going to start casting calls. I think you've got a leg up. I bet, in the shower at home, you think of the brats in the GOP and sing out loud, Zip a dee doo doo! Or not.
Enjoy your retirement, John. I hear that Disney's going to stage a musical on Broadway based on--that's right, you got it--Zippa dee doo dah. They're going to start casting calls. I think you've got a leg up. I bet, in the shower at home, you think of the brats in the GOP and sing out loud, Zip a dee doo doo! Or not.
4
"Bakersfield chic." I love that! I've never seen someone so happy to be leaving such a high-profile, theoretically powerful job. His announcement presser was a hoot. As for getting stuff done, I don't recall him being able to get much done, either. All those "Tea Party crazies" I guess. I DO hope he can get the debt limit increased before he goes, as you said, because otherwise those crazies are going to blow us all up economically. They might do that anyway.
God help us.
God help us.
21
Now that I know John Boehner is such a good guy (not!!) I am sad (not!!) that he will be leaving us. If his record as Speaker was so wonderful with Government shutdowns, do-nothing, no governance and the institution left to the winds, I shudder to think if had been a bad Speaker. The Pope did not exorcise him ( he was beyond that ). The fact is he wanted to enjoy his Merlot, chomp on his cigar, keep his orange tan and sing his favorite song," Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah, Zip-A-Dee-A ". Your snark is so befitting and hilarious!
24
That's firing on all cylinders. I hope you didn't bite your tongue while it was buried in your cheek.
6
Be careful what you wish for, look at the current candidates for Speaker! I would prefer Boehner anytime over those guys.
18
How helpful of Ms. Dowd to let readers know about the delightful human side the soon-to-be former speaker! Now that I know about his expertise with neckties, his cigarette brand, his apartment on G street, the SUV in which he's driven to work, his love of golf, his condo and his Brooks Brothers suits, I see there's no reason to care about the fact that, once again, the entire political spectrum moves to the right. Because that's not the story is it? The story isn't that Boehner's "to-the-right-of Goldwater" ideology came to be considered centrist and now an ideology far to the right of that is mainstream. No, it's ties and cigarettes and golf clubs.
1
Dowd: "The false prophets going for profits...the guys egging on my right-wing members to spread chaos...We’ve at least got to increase the federal debt limit to keep these clowns from tanking the economy."
Do these Republican clowns on the public dole (good pay and benefits and no work, all at taxpayer expense) know anytying other than "spread(ing) chaos"? With respect to "tanking the economy," they do not care about the "common good" that Pope Francis reminded them was their primary goal, i.e., to advance the "common good."
Chaos is there forte not the advancing of the guiding principles set forth in the Preamble to our Constitution:"...to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity..."
Do these Republican clowns on the public dole (good pay and benefits and no work, all at taxpayer expense) know anytying other than "spread(ing) chaos"? With respect to "tanking the economy," they do not care about the "common good" that Pope Francis reminded them was their primary goal, i.e., to advance the "common good."
Chaos is there forte not the advancing of the guiding principles set forth in the Preamble to our Constitution:"...to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity..."
6
Maureen nailed it. Aside from her eloquent and highly entertaining verbal assist, it took Boehner's resignation to make Boehner look good, and that's being kind.
10
I have no trouble believing that this might be what Boehner would say to any number of adolescents who line up to take his old job. The saddest part of it is that he was probably the most sane participant in the long Republican path to destruction, OURS, not necessarily theirs.
5
Like most of the GOP, Boehner subscribed to the policy of party above country. To help his party assent, he welcomed the Tea Partiers only to find out that while they were willing to help the GOP, they were not only are they bad for the country, but worse than he could have imagined. Now the Tea Party is firmly entrenched and if republicans manage to take charge of Congress and the White House, the TP wing will force government to take a path we'll all regret.
7
The problem is that we will as a nation need to put up with these goof balls when you are gone. You created them, Mr. Boehner, and now like Frankenstein's monster they have run amuck.
19
If we have egotistical idiots for representatives and legislators, we have snarky silly journalists to report on this.
Boehner's record is less than average, and he is mediocre beyond belief. Lot of stuff that we complain about and cringe at in Congress today were either created or sustained by men like Boehner.
His last six years has been that of a single-issue-attack man (for the Republicans, of the Republicans and by the Republicans) against Obamacare. That's it. And before that "just keeping the one percenters satisfied, entertained and well oiled".
You make his departure appear as if it is a loss of an important "negotiator". He was the biggest "negator" around.
NYT has lost its intelligent insights into issues of importance...
But zippy deedoo day indeed.
Boehner's record is less than average, and he is mediocre beyond belief. Lot of stuff that we complain about and cringe at in Congress today were either created or sustained by men like Boehner.
His last six years has been that of a single-issue-attack man (for the Republicans, of the Republicans and by the Republicans) against Obamacare. That's it. And before that "just keeping the one percenters satisfied, entertained and well oiled".
You make his departure appear as if it is a loss of an important "negotiator". He was the biggest "negator" around.
NYT has lost its intelligent insights into issues of importance...
But zippy deedoo day indeed.
2
Maureen Dowd, you're back! Thank you!
2
Boehner enjoyed some "highballs", Scotch Whiskey like many Americans enjoy as well. Boehner enjoyed mowing his lawn and wearing nice suits and ties like many Americans.
John Boehner is pro-life and supports life from conception to natural death like many Americans and that is a good thing as well. Speaker Boehner is a truly good man and a great Christian leader who sacrificed many years of his life to defend the American principles of defending life and liberty for all Americans from conception to natural death.
We all thank Congressman and Speaker of the House John Boehner for his many years of dedicated service to the United States of America and to the millions of In Utero American babies.
John Boehner is pro-life and supports life from conception to natural death like many Americans and that is a good thing as well. Speaker Boehner is a truly good man and a great Christian leader who sacrificed many years of his life to defend the American principles of defending life and liberty for all Americans from conception to natural death.
We all thank Congressman and Speaker of the House John Boehner for his many years of dedicated service to the United States of America and to the millions of In Utero American babies.
Might have made a difference if this column was written 7 years ago.
3
Herding cats is child's play compared to any attempt at controlling House Republicans. Maybe there's a new useful metaphor being generated.
4
Now you're back on track doing what you do best.
6
This (the last 7 years) is the first iteration of this degree (the nth degree) of congressional craziness, and people were unprepared to a.) Belive it, b.) Take it seriously enough, leading to c.) develop the considerable spinal structure to withstand it. This may be what the next 50 years is all about.
Sometimes I wonder if we don't need a meteorite, or a plague, or something to wake us up as a species...we can't know how much time we have, but wasting it like this just seems so wrong...
Sometimes I wonder if we don't need a meteorite, or a plague, or something to wake us up as a species...we can't know how much time we have, but wasting it like this just seems so wrong...
3
"False prophets going for profits" Absolutely Brilliant. Thank you. I really enjoy these occasional monologues you write on behalf of our public figures. Maybe call Sorkin and create a web series?
3
When Kevin McCarthy was spouting off his innermost thoughts to Sean Hannity I was reminded of the dangers of living in a bubble. You really believe that everybody out there agrees with you. I guess Mr McCarthy doesn't get out enough. There was a similar outburst in Wisconsin from one of Walker's hangers on, Fitzgerald, when he told the Fox reporter that Act 10 would ensure that Obama would lose Wisconsin in 2012. Obama won Wisconsin, but unfortunately the employees got victimized during the fun and games.
8
I worry, he may have stood by, while the entire country was hollowed out, like a Mitt Romney factory town. And, now, we are suppose to the help the poor?
2
Who wants to bet that this "exorcism" ends with a $1M job for Boehner at a lobbying firm of his choice? The whole story hasn't been written on Boehner's resignation but Ms. Dowd's version is a beginning.
4
This article reads about the same when you replace the name Boehner with President Obama or almost any politician heading for the door soon for that matter.
Boehner or no Boehner, the Republicans will continue to use scurrilous scams like the Benghazi affair to try to discredit Democrats like Hillary Clinton. Why? Because they work. They work because the Republicans are appealing to their base which consists in large part of old rich white guys and low information boneheads whose best interests actually lie with the Democrats. The problem is not the politicians. The problem is the voters.
27
K Street beckons. What will the lucky cause be? The PGA? Tanning beds? Tobacco?
9
Mo, you've written some sharp-edged, sarcastic satire over the years.
This isn't one of them.
This isn't one of them.
3
This is exactly how I pictured it-the Pope stirring up what was left of Boehner's conscience, a tearful confession by the Speaker and the Pope exhorting him to abandon his old ways and the Philistines he hung with.
Don't expect John to be working at a homeless shelter or a think tank for that matter. All that thinking from all those tanks is what caused all his misery and all those poor people didn't help things either- all they had to do was just get off their rear ends and get a job.
There's one thing we should thank Boehner for-he wasn't Newt Gingrich. Goodbye, John. Hit 'em straight.
Don't expect John to be working at a homeless shelter or a think tank for that matter. All that thinking from all those tanks is what caused all his misery and all those poor people didn't help things either- all they had to do was just get off their rear ends and get a job.
There's one thing we should thank Boehner for-he wasn't Newt Gingrich. Goodbye, John. Hit 'em straight.
4
It is sobering that Boehner's resignation demonstrates that he is smarter than the screaming ratpack that swings Congress by the tail.
13
Now he can trade his spray on tan for the real McCoy! Florida sunshine and an orange a day and there's no telling what color he'll turn.
3
Now on to the process of drowning that small government (except for the military) in a bathtub. Onward Christian Soldier!
5
"We’ve at least got to increase the federal debt limit to keep these clowns from tanking the economy." Well, Shakespeare's Hamlet could put it this way: to wreck the economy or not to wreck it, that is the question.
It is a month away in human time, but just days away in Congress time: when the United States once again is at the mercy of a stupid and unnecessary law which prevents the federal government from borrowing money.
One of the ironies is that the party of market worship, the G.O.P., does not want the bond market to exercise its restraint against government borrowing, which it does by raising the interest (dividends) it demands of profligate borrowers. Instead, Republicans want to control borrowing by edict. What is even more amazing is that they demand that the government spend $X even though it has less than $X available, which itself is a consequence of these fools refusing to increase government revenues.
Where is the money for the two Trillion-Dollar Republican wars supposed to come from? Thin air? Trees?
It is a month away in human time, but just days away in Congress time: when the United States once again is at the mercy of a stupid and unnecessary law which prevents the federal government from borrowing money.
One of the ironies is that the party of market worship, the G.O.P., does not want the bond market to exercise its restraint against government borrowing, which it does by raising the interest (dividends) it demands of profligate borrowers. Instead, Republicans want to control borrowing by edict. What is even more amazing is that they demand that the government spend $X even though it has less than $X available, which itself is a consequence of these fools refusing to increase government revenues.
Where is the money for the two Trillion-Dollar Republican wars supposed to come from? Thin air? Trees?
4
Goodness. Haters gonna hate.
1
I never know when to take Dowd seriously and when to laugh it off! Always a good read....
Reading this fantasy yarn about the imminent departure of Sir Orange Boehner gives me the feeling that the Congress is run by a bunch of black suited Mafia style goons who hemmed & hawed until the Liberty Bell cracked again. Boehner and his basement tapes include supporting the Pope although defecating on the real Jesus' biblical message to honor the poor & downtrodden. Boehner's biggest achievement was supporting the American flag while denying equal rights for all groups other than his big moneyed donors including bar & used car dealers, accountants & financial consultants, developers & mortgage brokers, agribusiness, student loan company CEOs & for profit University presidents as well as waste management CEOs, hedge fund managers, Commercial TV station owners, lobbyists, pharmaceutical manufacturers, restaurant owners, stock equity firms, etc. Good ol' boy Boehner was firmly against TARP but voted for it anyway. Like the lovelorn protagonist in Goethe's sturm und drang novel, The Sorrows of Young Werther, he mastered the face of maudlin fiction, even crying when someone mentioned fetal tissue while merely getting teary-eyed at the thought of school prayer in all schools. He was downright awe stricken at he idea of voting down any environmental legislation while thrilled to sign away American jobs through free trade. Being a big supporter of Homeland Security as well as fanatical defender of gun rights at home makes him a life long member of the GOP mafia.
9
''The institution is filled with people who should be in an institution.''
I am confused Ms D, did he mean mental, correctional or both?
And would three strikes apply to these repeat offenders?
Good column.
I am confused Ms D, did he mean mental, correctional or both?
And would three strikes apply to these repeat offenders?
Good column.
9
Gail Collins she isn't...
3
Ms. Dowd, you are way, way too kind and blind to Boehner and his crimes against the American people's business and needs...yet, a very funny expose of the Republicans running amok and turning the House of Representatives into a modern day version of the 15th Century Spanish Inquisition.
Now it's time to expose the Republicans in the Senate for their sworn devotion to ending governance in America.
Now it's time to expose the Republicans in the Senate for their sworn devotion to ending governance in America.
14
And this guy was third in line for the presidency. At least he proves the axiom, that any America could become president of the United States.
2
Maureen, great column. Funny, which you haven't been in years!!!
5
The truth is the GOP have no leadership, the republicans now follows the conservative radio talkshows the heritage foundation the Tea Party operatives and the like of Joe six pack, Bundy, Kim Davis and governing turned into continuos process of election cycles. In a two party democracy system that is dangerous unless the other party grew a backbone and cleaned all that mess.
15
Thanks for the laughs! The line about Trey Gowdy is worth a year's subscription.
And remember, that "if you have no critics, you'll likely have no success". Wishing you continued success.
And remember, that "if you have no critics, you'll likely have no success". Wishing you continued success.
2
Dead ringer OP-ED today, Ms. Dowd. Being conservative, true-heart GOP Republucan comes with their overwrought baggage and philosophy. The GOP is laced with people so completely (interdependent) irrespective of varying agendas, --and that intellegent types are painted with the crazies brush. How is it possible for educated, normal people to be a card carrying Republican these days. The GOP is spinning completely out-of-control and the party is doomed outright. The GOP Congress failed themselves due to nutcase religion and incompatibility of factions.
7
Only a shallow supplicant to shallow power could lap so eagerly at the heels of our buffoonish ruling classes. Dowd stoops to serve.
Boehner has long reminded me of a lackadaisical teacher, who is most concerned with personal looks, being liked by the kids, minimizing actual work, and can't control a classroom.
Observe the classroom, and the kids are clearly in charge, not the teacher. Class clowns are acting out and showing off; bullying kids are taunting the students who try to get their work done despite the chaos; and some little boys spend most of their time teasing and tormenting the girls just to make their lives more miserable than they already are.
When a showoff in the class comes up with a really stupid idea to deflect class attention from doing the assigned work, the teacher sighs and goes along with it—it's easier that way. The result is nothing constructive gets done, and the class scores are the lowest in the history of K-12 education in America.
Tired of the unruly classroom and for being blamed by just about everyone for being a really bad teacher, the teacher resigns in a huff. The teacher blames the students for the classroom that the teacher couldn't/wouldn't control.
Observe the classroom, and the kids are clearly in charge, not the teacher. Class clowns are acting out and showing off; bullying kids are taunting the students who try to get their work done despite the chaos; and some little boys spend most of their time teasing and tormenting the girls just to make their lives more miserable than they already are.
When a showoff in the class comes up with a really stupid idea to deflect class attention from doing the assigned work, the teacher sighs and goes along with it—it's easier that way. The result is nothing constructive gets done, and the class scores are the lowest in the history of K-12 education in America.
Tired of the unruly classroom and for being blamed by just about everyone for being a really bad teacher, the teacher resigns in a huff. The teacher blames the students for the classroom that the teacher couldn't/wouldn't control.
11
Oh..-.vanity, vanity, vanity....and this too....scratch the surface with the
"jello-head" Boehner...and you get another...vane ...speaker to be..
again...vanity, vanity, vanity...and a big ole foot in the mouth ....jello-head
even worse than jello head Boehner...
AAhhhh....me oh my....good lookin ...but dumber than dumb...McCarthy.
and ...so it goes...what other dummer than dumb dummy can the lobby
picked Tea Party pick..whose the next good lookin dummy the Tea Party
can put up for auction.....HO HUM !!!...next ?????
"jello-head" Boehner...and you get another...vane ...speaker to be..
again...vanity, vanity, vanity...and a big ole foot in the mouth ....jello-head
even worse than jello head Boehner...
AAhhhh....me oh my....good lookin ...but dumber than dumb...McCarthy.
and ...so it goes...what other dummer than dumb dummy can the lobby
picked Tea Party pick..whose the next good lookin dummy the Tea Party
can put up for auction.....HO HUM !!!...next ?????
1
Delightfully tight musing, Maureen.
The world is rid of Boehner but still stuck with a dangerous, wacky
House where ignorance reigns.
The world is rid of Boehner but still stuck with a dangerous, wacky
House where ignorance reigns.
8
Boehner is nowhere near this clever.
2
Kevin McCarthy revealing the reason for his special committee's investigation into the deaths of four Americans in Banghazi recalls Disraeli's, "Something unpleasant is coming when men are anxious to speak the truth." In this case the unpleasantness is McCarthy, a toxic mix of Charlie and Joseph McCarthy, becoming Speaker of the House.
10
Hey, Maureen, I see winding through this a boost for Hillary....will wonders never cease....
3
"Well, listen. I'm not qualified to debate the science over climate change. But I am astute enough to understand that every proposal that has come out of this administration to deal with climate change involves hurting our economy and killing American jobs," said Boehner. "That can't be the prescription for dealing with changes in our climate."
And we are supposed to think we are losing a voice of sanity? Boehner may be just a nice guy with no principles which well describes many so-called main stream Republicans. Whenever a politician places his re-election before the best interests of the country, we experience things like the Tea-Party loonies.
I, for one, would like to see term limits. One term for those who serve in the House of Representatives, and one term for Senators. That way we may actually get folks elected who will have to go back home and live in the world they helped create. We would then have the voice of the "people." Lunatics will obviously get elected, just as they are now, but they'll be gone after one term. Yes, one term and no pensions and health insurance for life. I've listened to the arguments about getting things done, but they are without merit. Just look at our infrastructure now. We resemble what used to be called a Third World Country. Our only excellence is the military because we are willing to spend insane amounts of money on it while other countries are manufacturing things and taking care of their people' education and health care.
And we are supposed to think we are losing a voice of sanity? Boehner may be just a nice guy with no principles which well describes many so-called main stream Republicans. Whenever a politician places his re-election before the best interests of the country, we experience things like the Tea-Party loonies.
I, for one, would like to see term limits. One term for those who serve in the House of Representatives, and one term for Senators. That way we may actually get folks elected who will have to go back home and live in the world they helped create. We would then have the voice of the "people." Lunatics will obviously get elected, just as they are now, but they'll be gone after one term. Yes, one term and no pensions and health insurance for life. I've listened to the arguments about getting things done, but they are without merit. Just look at our infrastructure now. We resemble what used to be called a Third World Country. Our only excellence is the military because we are willing to spend insane amounts of money on it while other countries are manufacturing things and taking care of their people' education and health care.
7
Iosif Vissarionovich Dzhugashvili - "Stalin"
Jason E. (Evil?) Chaffetz
Harold Watson Gowdy - "Trey"
SHOW TRIAL - "A public trial in which there is a strong connotation that the judicial authorities have already determined the guilt of the defendant."
Jason E. (Evil?) Chaffetz
Harold Watson Gowdy - "Trey"
SHOW TRIAL - "A public trial in which there is a strong connotation that the judicial authorities have already determined the guilt of the defendant."
3
Boehner had to retire before his vacation retreat on "Marco Island" disappears into the Gulf of Mexico. Although the highest point on the Island is 50' feet that's an artificial hill created by native americans piling up shells for eons.
3
Clever and enjoyable but so pathetic and disheartening at the same time. Our country, far, far, far from ever being perfect, has entered a new historical, hysterical period. We are completely reliant on knaves and liars, stupid men and women, to care for us and those we love. Most disheartening is the realization that every one of those knaves and liars was actually ELECTED by people just like them. If only all of us could afford Marco Island condos and Brooks Brothers suits without choking in Koch dollars. Enjoy, Mr. Speaker. Or as we say in Wisconsin, Molotov to you.
10
the voice, strong chin and watery blues make boehner a cinch for the movies, the james bond thing is still open and duke wayne is yet to be replaced on horseback or in uniform...go get 'em pilgrim.
1
congrats! this was a really fun read, at last your barbs have slanted right
where there is so much material for you. Loved it!
where there is so much material for you. Loved it!
8
It was great seeing him sitting in his office fidgeting in front of the pope and then crying in back of him in congress. That was because he spent the last five years as speaker of the house fighting tooth and nail to stop everything the Pope is for. Must of made him feel rather like a jerk.
12
Ol' Br'er Bayner zippidee doo da'ing all he wants has to admit to himself that he will forever be tarred as the man who couldn't or wouldn't lead the Republican party out of the briar patch it has become.
6
Shame on John Boehner .... He spent 20 years trying to get a pope speak to Congress ... And when his spiritual leader came and spoke he gave Boehner several actions ... Reform immigration, clean the environment, abolish the death penalty ... And to live by the golden rule ... No wonder he was crying ... Presumably he knew he doesn't have the integrity to pull any of this off ...
Prove me wrong John Boehner ... Follow your religious leader and bring the Senate's immigration bill to a vote ...
Or forever be the poster child 'par excellence' of religious hypocrisy ...
Prove me wrong John Boehner ... Follow your religious leader and bring the Senate's immigration bill to a vote ...
Or forever be the poster child 'par excellence' of religious hypocrisy ...
13
Well Dumbo and crew are making a clear path for Hillary on her way to White House but Ms. Dowd will try her best to discredit Hillary Clinton as the time rolls along.
We shall see to that !
We shall see to that !
3
Very funny and probably accurate.
5
A home run, Maureen. Thanks.
4
>
Funny! However, the joke is on the American people, since these GOP nuts will hold the House and the country hostage for the next 15-25 years.
While the liberals were busy cracking jokes like this clever one, the GOP gerrymandered the House districts and took over the Senate.
Funny! However, the joke is on the American people, since these GOP nuts will hold the House and the country hostage for the next 15-25 years.
While the liberals were busy cracking jokes like this clever one, the GOP gerrymandered the House districts and took over the Senate.
13
Dumb column - I don't care for Boehner and his ex-house members, but don't care much for fictional narratives either.
1
"Remember: A leader who doesn’t have anybody following him is just a guy taking a walk.”
Best line of the week. Glad to see you back in form Maureen..
Best line of the week. Glad to see you back in form Maureen..
8
"I have four weeks to clean out the barn" he muses.
More like the Augean Stables, and no Hercules in sight.
More like the Augean Stables, and no Hercules in sight.
11
So, you and Obama have nothing to lose, both heading for the exit now. Why not make some history and work together on helping the country ? Show Congress that you both are better than the reputations the media have labeled
you. You were a class act, I'll give you that, but God help us now with these Republican Yahoo's. Why not save the day and announce you are staying ?
Shake some things up. What have you got to lose ? If not, enjoy retirement.
you. You were a class act, I'll give you that, but God help us now with these Republican Yahoo's. Why not save the day and announce you are staying ?
Shake some things up. What have you got to lose ? If not, enjoy retirement.
3
Is this supposed to be funny? Cleaver? Witty? You need a new agent. Do you suppose that the only people who read the NYT are 60 and older?Learn how to write something relevant or get out of town. People under 35 can't stand your ilk!
2
Writing so beneath your talent, Maureen. High school prose.
I'm going to take a wild guess that the majority of people who hated your column sit to the right of Dick Cheney. Loosen up people. I would probably respect Boehner a little more if I heard that upon reading your column he broke down .....and laughed.
7
"Your colleagues and my soon-to-be-ex colleagues are ripped about you undermining their Benghazi scam."
The truth of the matter, Ms. Dowd, is that since day one of Benghazi the average thinking American has been aware that everything the Republicans have done was, and continues to be, nothing but a scam to try to hurt Hillary.
The truth of the matter, Ms. Dowd, is that since day one of Benghazi the average thinking American has been aware that everything the Republicans have done was, and continues to be, nothing but a scam to try to hurt Hillary.
17
"...this place stinks to high heaven."
Indeed!
Now that Ms. Dowd has opened a door to the House we can all get a wiff of the corrosive stench stirred up from a Republican cesspool by the Tea Party causus.
Indeed!
Now that Ms. Dowd has opened a door to the House we can all get a wiff of the corrosive stench stirred up from a Republican cesspool by the Tea Party causus.
8
Very funny Maureen. More than a bit of the Irish wit. Did that brownie in Colorado open up some new doors maybe? :>))
1
Most Maureen Dowd columns nowadays are annoying. This one was amusing (even though she got her crush Trump's name in it and a minor dig at Obama). Vintage Maureen Dowd.
1
Hoist on his own petard ought, more properly, to be Boehner's epitaph. The bit about Obama becoming a "lamer duck" had a tediously familiar whiff of bitterness, otherwise, Ms Dowd, this one was fun to read for a change.
2
This is why, even with the interminable twisted Obama and Clinton obsessions, I keep coming back. You never know when Maureen's gonna hit the next one out of the park. But this... another grand-slam homer.
And but as one of the good sisters at the Catholic high school I attended warned us stupid sarcastic kids back when we had no chance of actually listening: sarcasm is a dual-edged sword--it cuts in both directions. Anyone who wields Maureen as a voice of truth one one day has to know full-well s/he'll be cut down the next week, or, the week after that--tops.
Every cow we hold sacred will eventually be Gored by this (what's the word for someone with a great vocabulary) redhead and once again we'll be wondering, but why?
But I don't care. I'm just hoping she devotes a column or two (prior to his presidency) to Bernie. I just hope she reports the the truth I know she's capable of with all the irony and snark the pages of the Times can muster.
By the way, he's gonna be in Tucson Reid Park next Friday. I'll be there. Hope to see you there too!
And but as one of the good sisters at the Catholic high school I attended warned us stupid sarcastic kids back when we had no chance of actually listening: sarcasm is a dual-edged sword--it cuts in both directions. Anyone who wields Maureen as a voice of truth one one day has to know full-well s/he'll be cut down the next week, or, the week after that--tops.
Every cow we hold sacred will eventually be Gored by this (what's the word for someone with a great vocabulary) redhead and once again we'll be wondering, but why?
But I don't care. I'm just hoping she devotes a column or two (prior to his presidency) to Bernie. I just hope she reports the the truth I know she's capable of with all the irony and snark the pages of the Times can muster.
By the way, he's gonna be in Tucson Reid Park next Friday. I'll be there. Hope to see you there too!
1
Sorry, I just can't yuck it up about Boehner. A chicken hawk who smiles as our bombs fall on innocent people, a Millionaire who works hard to keep medical care from poor people because they are poor.
Perhaps it's because I'm poor and live with people who have really been hurt by this man.
Perhaps it's because I'm poor and live with people who have really been hurt by this man.
15
Farewell to John Boehner. No "demands of the job" could ever justify the malice he acted on when dealing with President Obama. His crocodile tears will never wash away the stain of it.
7
Last time I looked Hillary's Vast Right Wing Conspiracy was headed up by Obama's FBI.
Ah yes, John Boehner. He will forever be remembered, at least by me, for handing checks from lobbyists on the House floor. And it was from tobacco companies.
9
Do you really believe Boehner won't be installed on K Street sooner rather than later?
Or do you think he is... errrrm... presidential, at least compared to the mad dog 15? He, too, demonstrates the madnes of the extreme right. Color him orange.
Or do you think he is... errrrm... presidential, at least compared to the mad dog 15? He, too, demonstrates the madnes of the extreme right. Color him orange.
3
John Boehner has only three weeks to escape the briar patch of the House with something other than the reputation of being one of the most inept Speakers in history. Whether or not that reputation is too harsh, Boehner has probably run out of time to do anything about it.
Even the prankster, Br’er Rabbit, would not be able to zip-a-dee-doo-dah his way out of this patch. If the embattled, and apparently not-too-bright, Kevin McCarthy actually made a 9-1-1 call for help to Boehner after letting the Benghazi cat out of the bag, then the outgoing – in more ways than one – Speaker might want to consider a similar call for help to President Obama.
Any port in a storm.
Even the prankster, Br’er Rabbit, would not be able to zip-a-dee-doo-dah his way out of this patch. If the embattled, and apparently not-too-bright, Kevin McCarthy actually made a 9-1-1 call for help to Boehner after letting the Benghazi cat out of the bag, then the outgoing – in more ways than one – Speaker might want to consider a similar call for help to President Obama.
Any port in a storm.
5
Do I note an almost apology to Clinton after dozens of screeds lambasting her from every imaginable angle? That was almost big of you, Ms. Dowd.
10
What a worthless column and a bunch of predictable worthless comments.
1
Very few find time to read the NYTimes anymore, and when they do it's almost always to either excoriate it as a Communist propaganda organ, or to apologize for its liberal way.
In any event, I do miss the NYTimes I grew up with -- the one my mother fought to have Sunday's issue delivered in our liberal Chicago suburb of Oak Park.
And the one that made or broke plays, novels, restaurants and even mayors.
Those days are over, and I'm well into my 50's. Mom will be 85 later this month.
So all evidence (the favored term of the day) seems to be pointing toward a demise of this once great paper.
As we all become pressured into, and inured from, the silly, anonymous and embarrassing sources of information that substitute gossip and innuendo for truth in 2015.
In any event, I do miss the NYTimes I grew up with -- the one my mother fought to have Sunday's issue delivered in our liberal Chicago suburb of Oak Park.
And the one that made or broke plays, novels, restaurants and even mayors.
Those days are over, and I'm well into my 50's. Mom will be 85 later this month.
So all evidence (the favored term of the day) seems to be pointing toward a demise of this once great paper.
As we all become pressured into, and inured from, the silly, anonymous and embarrassing sources of information that substitute gossip and innuendo for truth in 2015.
1
I just love it when you get into people's heads, Ms. Dowd.
1
When, in 12 years, they start the canonization process of Pope Francis, one of the required proofs of miraculous intervention that will be offered will be the resignation of Speaker Boehner. By that time, Boehner himself will have admitted to the mysterious conversion that caused him to break into tears next to the pontiff.
4
In this column I can see the old sparkle in Ms. Dowd, which I had admired for so long, but that I had thought was long extinguished now. Maybe the pope's visit caused a certain former catholic school girl to engage in some self-examination as well?
Fantastic column, Maureen, please keep up the good work! I still think you give Boehner to much credit for a non-existing ability to self-examine, but it's a great start.
Fantastic column, Maureen, please keep up the good work! I still think you give Boehner to much credit for a non-existing ability to self-examine, but it's a great start.
2
THIS is the Maureen who seemed to have gone into hibernation since Dubya left office in 2009.
Welcome back! We missed you.
Welcome back! We missed you.
5
If Hillary Clinton is "untrustable," then soon-to-be speaker Kevin McCarthy is a prevaricationer.
4
There are too many demons in the Republican party. Lower taxes on the wealthy - the old has never worked trickle down - don't raise the debt ceiling just close down the government - a terrific answer - take away any health care whether it's the ACA or Planned Parenthood, let the big corporations bring their money back at no cost, frack, drill and the hell with the air or warming earth, and let's spend money harassing Hillary for the next year - with tax payer money. I think it is time for those of us earning under six figures to put our tax money in escrow accounts and wait to support our government when the demons leave.
14
I wonder who appreciates this? There are 10s of millions of people who have no idea what you are talking about. They vote. They pay taxes. It's not them. It's you.
3
I see you are still making up all of you stories Mo at least this time you are trying to be tongue in cheek, instead of pretending the story is real.
4
Maureen, I've read you for years, this is one of your best. Thanks for the humor, it's needed.
8
It is often forgotten, and clearly Ms. Dowd did in her attempt to moderate who Boehner is, that he was one of Newt Gingrich's top lieutenants in the 1994 Republican revolution.
Boehner was Tea Party before Tea Party was cool.
Boehner was Tea Party before Tea Party was cool.
23
I can't believe you used Uncle Remus and SONG OF THE SOUTH in public. Talk about difficult characters. Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah may be an iconic Disney song, but there are a whole lotta people out there who consider Joel Chandler Harris to be the purveyor of racist literature...even though he really was the exact opposite of that. Or were you attempting to make a rather subtle point about the man-who-will-be-the-former-Speaker-of-the-House?
Your column, while witty, does not provide any new information, only a rework of what we already know: that the GOP well is dry and there is no one in the wings who is capable enough to cobble together some kind of coalition. Boehner and most of his cadre is racist from the get-go, and using the folklorist Harris is really a misappropriation of a guy trying to preserve a specific period of Black culture, not destroy it.
The Benghazi committee, like the ridiculous attempts to repeal the ACA, is a colossal waste of tax-payer money. Those acts specifically target the middle and lower classes....but you knew that. They have no care whatsoever for the welfare of We, the People, let alone how our hard earned taxes are spent. Oh, Mr. Boehner may have lots of witty sound bites, but they are nothing but obfuscating nonsense. And that moment of truth on Fox, is nothing more than an anomaly.
http://wifelyperson.blogspot.com/
Your column, while witty, does not provide any new information, only a rework of what we already know: that the GOP well is dry and there is no one in the wings who is capable enough to cobble together some kind of coalition. Boehner and most of his cadre is racist from the get-go, and using the folklorist Harris is really a misappropriation of a guy trying to preserve a specific period of Black culture, not destroy it.
The Benghazi committee, like the ridiculous attempts to repeal the ACA, is a colossal waste of tax-payer money. Those acts specifically target the middle and lower classes....but you knew that. They have no care whatsoever for the welfare of We, the People, let alone how our hard earned taxes are spent. Oh, Mr. Boehner may have lots of witty sound bites, but they are nothing but obfuscating nonsense. And that moment of truth on Fox, is nothing more than an anomaly.
http://wifelyperson.blogspot.com/
16
This op-ed is a big waste of print space. If you have anything serious or informative to write about, then don't write.
2
Fabulous!
2
Ms Dowd you forgot one thing,that McCarthy and J Bush just joint into the bunch that try to copy Trump's STRAIGHT TALK EXPRESS without going to a paid seminar....
Hey Mo, I see weaving through this a boost for Hillary! Will wonders never cease.....
8
when Dowd writes these stream of consciousness pieces, she shows her true genius
totally hilarious
next week, do Hillary, OK?
totally hilarious
next week, do Hillary, OK?
Actually, I think Ms. Dowd has 'done' Hillary many, many times in stream of consciousness and other styles, probably not with the wit of this piece.
7
If the conversation was truly as is recorded here, Boehner had no more business serving as Speaker than Ms. Pelosi. The Washington, D.C. disease is even worse that William Proxmire and Rand Paul thought.
We could move all administrative offices from D.C. back to where real people live. The gov't could afford it, but could Starbucks? Would all the taxi driver have to finally learn English if the government moved to wherever the center of population for the lower 48 is plotted?
The most fun part is Boehner's version of, ''Apres moi, le deluge.'' Is the ego thing and arrogance really part of what happens to all the Mr. Smiths who go to Washington?
We could move all administrative offices from D.C. back to where real people live. The gov't could afford it, but could Starbucks? Would all the taxi driver have to finally learn English if the government moved to wherever the center of population for the lower 48 is plotted?
The most fun part is Boehner's version of, ''Apres moi, le deluge.'' Is the ego thing and arrogance really part of what happens to all the Mr. Smiths who go to Washington?
1
No one should ever feel the least bit sorry for Boehner. A nonentity and a political hack, he was out of his depth from day one. He has a weak and craven personality, can be bullied by loud yelling (How many votes to defund Obamacare ? Fifty-something?), and never had a sense of either purpose or respect for the office of Speaker that is supposed to put the interests of the American people and not the Republican Party first. Historians will rate him as one of the worst Speakers of all time and absolutely no one will miss him.
28
Brilliant piece, Ms. Dowd. Rather than truth being stranger than fiction, I think your fiction is strangely the truth.
12
"Remember: A leader who doesn’t have anybody following him is just a guy taking a walk.”
John Boehner doesn't have a clue about leadership. A leader wouldn't have quit and *then* called out the extremists in his caucus as "false prophets." A leader wouldn't have announced how ridiculous it was to shut down the government over Obamacare after the fact. He would have faced down the crazies in his party and let the chips fall, even if it meant losing the speakership. Instead, he caved, again and again.
Enjoy your retirement, Mr. Boehner. Now you can watch from the sidelines as *your* 401(k) takes a hit as hard-line Republicans push us to the brink of default once again. See how you like it.
John Boehner doesn't have a clue about leadership. A leader wouldn't have quit and *then* called out the extremists in his caucus as "false prophets." A leader wouldn't have announced how ridiculous it was to shut down the government over Obamacare after the fact. He would have faced down the crazies in his party and let the chips fall, even if it meant losing the speakership. Instead, he caved, again and again.
Enjoy your retirement, Mr. Boehner. Now you can watch from the sidelines as *your* 401(k) takes a hit as hard-line Republicans push us to the brink of default once again. See how you like it.
163
I don't think he will have the 401k and health insurance problems the rest of us have when we retire.
1
When leaving a position, a look back at the road traveled and its milestones is a part of the celebratory review: Boehner first won election on the heels of an Ohio scandal when the former seat holder admitted to sex with an underage girl (16; the contact may have begun when she was 13); he refused to resign, lost in the primary; later he was convicted of taking a bribe. That was Boehner's path to office, an instructive foreshadowing of the mindsets, limited desires and immoral impulses he would face as Speaker.
He bucked corruption as a member of "the gang of seven," a group of freshman members who helped expose the House banking scandal--but meanwhile, Boehner was diving for dollars and became part of the financial sleaze when he handed out lobbyists checks from the tobacco industry on the House floor while the House was in session--leaving America with the stark image (worst than Benghazi!) of the influence peddling of "pay to play."
He considered resigning when he lost his first leadership position, as chair of the Republican Conference (the number four position) to J. C, Watts in 1998, when Republicans swept out their leadership after the foibles of Gingrich as Speaker.
He climbed back only to reach new lows. He feared no evil; in fact, he found comfort in it, abetted it (his 60 votes to repeal the ACA, his refusal to bring the Senate bill on immigration up for a vote).
In addition to golf, here's hoping he goes to daily mass. He has much to confess.
He bucked corruption as a member of "the gang of seven," a group of freshman members who helped expose the House banking scandal--but meanwhile, Boehner was diving for dollars and became part of the financial sleaze when he handed out lobbyists checks from the tobacco industry on the House floor while the House was in session--leaving America with the stark image (worst than Benghazi!) of the influence peddling of "pay to play."
He considered resigning when he lost his first leadership position, as chair of the Republican Conference (the number four position) to J. C, Watts in 1998, when Republicans swept out their leadership after the foibles of Gingrich as Speaker.
He climbed back only to reach new lows. He feared no evil; in fact, he found comfort in it, abetted it (his 60 votes to repeal the ACA, his refusal to bring the Senate bill on immigration up for a vote).
In addition to golf, here's hoping he goes to daily mass. He has much to confess.
138
As speaker, Boehner was an enabler who has made the next speaker's job more difficult and inert; he is cleaning out the wrong barn, and its smell lingers over his legacy.
52
If only the Pope could have come earlier and maybe given Boehner the strength to stand up to the yahoos. As for Benghazi, Hillary has so many other targets of her own making on her back, whether true or not, to make Tea Party goers rejoice. These people don't need or want facts when the lies serve them better.
But while on the subject of Democrats, let's not forget all the compromises Obama handed the Right Wing on a silver platter. So there's a lot of spineless blame to go around here. The best thing for Boehner to do is to let the truth rip and tell this idiots off because come Nov. 1, he will never need his hanky again. Enjoy your retirement!!
But while on the subject of Democrats, let's not forget all the compromises Obama handed the Right Wing on a silver platter. So there's a lot of spineless blame to go around here. The best thing for Boehner to do is to let the truth rip and tell this idiots off because come Nov. 1, he will never need his hanky again. Enjoy your retirement!!
34
Ooh.. 300 bills, is that a record or something?
4
A true patriot -- a statesman -- would have stayed till the end of his term and worked with the President and the Democrats to make things happen. He would have stood up to the Cruzers. Instead, like Pontius Pilate, Boehner is washing his hands, leaving the Crazies in charge of the asylum. He's doing a Palin! Thanks, Mr. Speaker -- for abandoning your post.
232
Well, hallelujah, you finally took some jabs at the repugnicans, even though you were just fantasizing what bonehead was thinking. You should do more of this, there's plenty to write about on the clown train.
99
Boehner could get some things accomplished if he acts fast. Pass a budget, raise the debt limit permanently, pass immigration reform, pass a highway bill. He could do this with the Democrats. But that will not happen. Like the Wizard of Oz, the Pope gave Boehner a heart. He needed courage! Besides, Democrats may not be willing to hand him such a victory either. Oh well.....it would make a great Hollywood ending to a sad career in decline.
70
Ms. Dowd has re-discovered her stride in this article, as an insightful and incisive dissector of some of our horrible politicians; when she settles on her target, and relies on her deep knowledge of insider Washington workings, Ms. Dowd can work linguistic magic. One can hope she continues on this almost legendary path...there is so much working of the scalpel to be done in the coming months.
84
If Pope Francis preformed a silent exorcism in the republican house,many do not believe it worked !
18
I agree. The GOP is mostly moderate, aka liberal, going along with liberals on everything. That's evil. It's leading to disaster.
At least Boehner was genuine and true to character whether you liked him or not. His problem was that he is a throwback to mid twentieth century- and was no match for big data driven President Obama.
12
Nonsense - Boehner is more of a throwback to the gilded age, when plutocrats bought their politicians one at a time instead of getting the whole GOP party at wholesale.
1
House Speaker Boehner had a remarkable record of legislative success as Lord of The MisRepresentative Flies in getting his kindergarten class to vote to repeal 'Obamacare' on sixty separate occasions.
If at first you don't succeed, continue repeating the failure until you get sick of yourself and your kindergarten friends.
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/boehner-to-continue-repea...
(The Borowitz Report)—House Speaker John Boehner announced that he would resign as Speaker and leave Congress in October, but said that he would continue repealing Obamacare from his home in Ohio.
Explaining his decision, Boehner told reporters, “A lot of the Speaker’s job is administrative, which is time-consuming and tiring. In retirement, I’ll have more time for what I really love: repealing Obamacare.”
Boehner said that he plans to begin every day with a good breakfast, some exercise, and a vote to repeal Obamacare before lunch.
“No one knows how much time one is allotted on this planet,” Boehner, striking a somber tone, said. “But if the Lord above grants me good health, I will repeal Obamacare thousands of times before my journey ends.”'
-------------------
Thank you, John Boehner and the Republican Congress, for doing your best to keep the American people out of harm's way and away from the dangers of affordable universal healthcare coverage.
You were the best 'Repeal Obamacare' Speaker in United States history.
If at first you don't succeed, continue repeating the failure until you get sick of yourself and your kindergarten friends.
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/boehner-to-continue-repea...
(The Borowitz Report)—House Speaker John Boehner announced that he would resign as Speaker and leave Congress in October, but said that he would continue repealing Obamacare from his home in Ohio.
Explaining his decision, Boehner told reporters, “A lot of the Speaker’s job is administrative, which is time-consuming and tiring. In retirement, I’ll have more time for what I really love: repealing Obamacare.”
Boehner said that he plans to begin every day with a good breakfast, some exercise, and a vote to repeal Obamacare before lunch.
“No one knows how much time one is allotted on this planet,” Boehner, striking a somber tone, said. “But if the Lord above grants me good health, I will repeal Obamacare thousands of times before my journey ends.”'
-------------------
Thank you, John Boehner and the Republican Congress, for doing your best to keep the American people out of harm's way and away from the dangers of affordable universal healthcare coverage.
You were the best 'Repeal Obamacare' Speaker in United States history.
272
Boehner went along with Obama on every point. Boehner didn't stop evil Obama on anything.
You do realize Borowitz is satire, right?
“But last night I began thinking about this, and this morning I woke up, and I said my prayers as I always do, and I decided, you know, today’s the day I’m going to do this—as simple as that,” Boehner said. … yes, makes me wander what all he prays for: that he can deprive millions from getting affordable healthcare? Women getting health services they can't otherwise afford? More guns to serve justice? more global warming and richer rich at the little peoples expense... more hedge fund managers to buy their way into heaven? His god must be republican as he sure ain't anything like Jesus or of the Pope's cloak.
6
What a hoot! Of course, Trey Gowdy is a dead ringer for Draco Malfoy! What I want to know is who in the world has used the Cruciatus Curse on the whole Republican Party? The curse is well known to make people lose their minds.
29
Maureen Dowd - phoning it in again. Is she incapable of writing about this week's news? I'm so tired of this drivel.
21
Joe you don't know a good thing when you've read it!
The real drivel has been the eight years of Republican legislative constipation.
Way to lead Mr. Boehner. Zip A Dee Doo Doo and you're almost gone, don't let the door hit you on the backside on your way to the golf course !
The real drivel has been the eight years of Republican legislative constipation.
Way to lead Mr. Boehner. Zip A Dee Doo Doo and you're almost gone, don't let the door hit you on the backside on your way to the golf course !
If Boehner were as insightful, witty, and rational as Dowd's version of him, we and our congress would have been much better served. But Boehner is just a small-minded pol whose peccadilloes included resisting every sensible action proposed by President Obama, and lying to the American public about the Republicans' Benghazi scam and other manufactured lies and distortions. Poorly played, Mr. Boehner, poorly played.
451
Bravo and Amen!
4
"Knuckleheads"? "Lamebrains"? "Shut your big trap"? Did you watch The Three Stooges this morning?
8
Boehner’s next life should be as a cheer-leader with pom-poms, a twirling baton and marching music to cheer on Republican candidates to continue their “hyperventilating” idiotic comments in debates and to the media.
As a cheer-leader, Boehner’s proven record of serving Republican causes would serve them well to secure their appeals to cut taxes to the wealthy, to promote the NRA to market more guns to anyone with a pulse, to stop negotiations with any and all foreign powers to end world conflicts and to support the military-industrial complex.
Boehner’s “Mission Accomplished” moment would come when America is “exorcized” of all Democrats, the economy is destroyed and the wealthy sponsors and patrons of the Republican causes, the one-percenters, are living in tax-free splendor and opulence on the island of Fantasyland in the sunny Pacific.
No worry when oceans rise due to global warming and climate change. They all have ultra-large yachts and can easily sail to a new land of opportunity… err suckers !!! Did I say potential victims ???
As a cheer-leader, Boehner’s proven record of serving Republican causes would serve them well to secure their appeals to cut taxes to the wealthy, to promote the NRA to market more guns to anyone with a pulse, to stop negotiations with any and all foreign powers to end world conflicts and to support the military-industrial complex.
Boehner’s “Mission Accomplished” moment would come when America is “exorcized” of all Democrats, the economy is destroyed and the wealthy sponsors and patrons of the Republican causes, the one-percenters, are living in tax-free splendor and opulence on the island of Fantasyland in the sunny Pacific.
No worry when oceans rise due to global warming and climate change. They all have ultra-large yachts and can easily sail to a new land of opportunity… err suckers !!! Did I say potential victims ???
27
Speaker Boehner is a symbol of everything wrong with our country. We have unprecedented advantages in our modern age. No one needs to go without health care. No one need starve. No one needs to die of a gunshot wound. No one needs to be stuck in a country where their lives are in peril. No one needs to be denied rights based on being part of a minority. Supply side economics has been rejected based on empirical evidence. Global warming has been proven based on empirical evidence. We can solve the economy and the ecology.
Small government solutions to it all? Sure, show us how it will work. But stop paralyzing progress based on the selfish wishes of millionaires to save their tax dollars. It's all been a con and a money grab. The culprits are bolder and bolder (and stupider and stupider judging from false publicity hounds like K Davis). Boehner was the ring leader but lost control of the team. He quit to keep from being exposed as a fraud. Now he can be Mr. tax pledge and then not have to vote to shut the government down.
Small government solutions to it all? Sure, show us how it will work. But stop paralyzing progress based on the selfish wishes of millionaires to save their tax dollars. It's all been a con and a money grab. The culprits are bolder and bolder (and stupider and stupider judging from false publicity hounds like K Davis). Boehner was the ring leader but lost control of the team. He quit to keep from being exposed as a fraud. Now he can be Mr. tax pledge and then not have to vote to shut the government down.
52
Maureen, you ARE trustable in my book!
3
That the verbatim content of this piece may actually be going through Boehner's mind is really frightening. Funny, but frightening.
12
Boehner can play golf, become a lobbyist, write a book or whatever he wants,,,or, he could start a foundation, under the guise of humanitarianism ala the clintons. THE question is whether he would run it as a double for
money laundering...why not...it works for bill and hillary.
money laundering...why not...it works for bill and hillary.
6
Make her stop...bad comedy
4
Ms. Dowd,
I am ecstatic that you have returned with your satirical wit.
I am ecstatic that you have returned with your satirical wit.
15
Maureen as only Maureen can be. Irish Wit with a Capital W. Thank you, Maureen for one clever column.
15
This column was classic Maureen Dowd. Thank you Maureen, it brought the first real smile to my face in days! Please continue to be your old self, I have missed the old Maureen.
Kevin probably thought he had the Speakership all wrapped up, and could "speak freely" amongst the faux news folks, and give them some inside information that he thought only he was privy to in his exalted "almost" position. The Benghazi cat is roaming freely now that it is out of the bag, and Hillary is purring now.
Kevin probably thought he had the Speakership all wrapped up, and could "speak freely" amongst the faux news folks, and give them some inside information that he thought only he was privy to in his exalted "almost" position. The Benghazi cat is roaming freely now that it is out of the bag, and Hillary is purring now.
26
Hillary can purr until the cats come home but she cannot escape all the lies she has told and the Fact that majority of voters consider her Untrustworthy !!!
Some really good humor and probably a lot of truth. Seriously, where to they get people like McCarthy, Chaffetz, Cruz and Gohmert? 40% of my high school class left school prior to graduation, yet that 40% probably would have been better as a Congressman or Senator than that bunch. Oh well, can't ask for everything, I would just like to get some of it.
8
The Tea Party Crazies have taken over the once Grand Old Party of Lincoln and Eisenhower. Boehner had an epiphany, saw the light, and is getting the H outta Dodge. Even the most merciful Holy Father himself, Pope Francis, can not cast an exorcism to rid the Tea Party GOP of its intrinsically evil partisan psychosis.
Tea Party terrorists have won, Trump shall over-comb, but a Democrat in the White House is assured for 2016.
Tea Party terrorists have won, Trump shall over-comb, but a Democrat in the White House is assured for 2016.
22
John Boehner's downfall was spiraling out of control long before the Pope's visit. However, Boehner felt he was entitled one last hurrah with an important world leader before making his resignation official. In the end Boehner knew he was going to get thrown under the bus by his disgruntled colleagues and it was better to go while the going was good. By the way. Maureen Dowd, Song of the South is now considered racist in today's politically correct world. That Zip Ah Dee Doo Dah spoof was unnerving.
5
ah, Maureen, the sphinx pose will do nothing for your backswing....
H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S !! Maureen in her element! Boy! I sure don't envy the Man anymore! The Papal Light washed away his sins and he became a free man who found his way back. " Marco Island, eating oranges, getting as orange as Trump's hair?" A line for the ages! You bludgeoned the Republican Party through John Boehner. You get an A+++ for these musings of the soon to be ex-Speaker. And your signature swipe at President Obama. Please keep this coming, Maureen.
3
Maureen, over the years you've driven me crazy with your serious attempts to psychoanalyze you enemies but this spoof is beautiful. It was delightful because it didn't attempt to rip anyone to shreds, it just let the light of humor play on their exterior without trying to get into their mind. Thank you.
5
Ms Dowd..very funny because it rings true..
The Untrustable Freedom Caucus and Kevin McCarthy, a man who can joyously articulate to the Fox minions the power of the Hillary Clinton witch hunt, have created even more vindictive government then we have previously suffered. John Boehner and company have embraced this strategy of political blood sport as we witnessed the Planned Parenthood theatre....this is what you mean when you said something else GOP rhetoric. They play photoshop videos, charts of cherry-picked fiction, absurd claims that if you apologize you must be guilty of whatever I can make-up, and by the why you make too much money.
Boehner has cried his way through government shut-downs, dropping our credit ratings, while proclaiming the need for Hebert Hoover austerity as we labor our way-out of the Bush-made Recession. This government vendetta has made pretending to be Middle Class a whole lot harder.
The Untrustable Freedom Caucus and Kevin McCarthy, a man who can joyously articulate to the Fox minions the power of the Hillary Clinton witch hunt, have created even more vindictive government then we have previously suffered. John Boehner and company have embraced this strategy of political blood sport as we witnessed the Planned Parenthood theatre....this is what you mean when you said something else GOP rhetoric. They play photoshop videos, charts of cherry-picked fiction, absurd claims that if you apologize you must be guilty of whatever I can make-up, and by the why you make too much money.
Boehner has cried his way through government shut-downs, dropping our credit ratings, while proclaiming the need for Hebert Hoover austerity as we labor our way-out of the Bush-made Recession. This government vendetta has made pretending to be Middle Class a whole lot harder.
140
Maureen Dowd is in great form today! She has lost her edge somewhat lately. Not today!
1
Yes, Maureen, the Papal "exorcism" seems to have failed and now all we need to end this sorry "song of the south" is to put a stake through the heart of all these vampires' endlessly seeking the "true blood" of President Obama, immigrants, women, Planned Parenthood providers, climate change believers, gun regulation advocates and any other person that seeks to improve human life. Boehner may be banished, but the dark forces death and doom are nesting in Congress. It may be a "wonderful day," but I wouldn't wander the halls at night.
128
It's a pleasure to read Maureen when she's not devoting herself to bashing Hillary and 'Barry'.
16
"House Select Committee to Drive Down Hillary’s Poll Numbers"
That's funny. This is a funny column, unlike your snarky ones.
That's funny. This is a funny column, unlike your snarky ones.
13
The kid from the hood, makes twenty five years. Ohio's 8th congressional district doesn't change much. Despite his tearing up and taking breaks to go out and light up, its congressman, doesn't do much.
He did nothing during 'W's eight years of war and near bankruptcy for the bigger hood, the USA. The result 0% interest rates. We need it to survive!
He helped bash Obama, he helped the country stagnate. Now the republicans want to make things worse. At least he's grown beyond that.
Unfortunately the crocodile tears we see shed for his departure may turn real as the quality of our congressional representatives continues to exacerbate!
He did nothing during 'W's eight years of war and near bankruptcy for the bigger hood, the USA. The result 0% interest rates. We need it to survive!
He helped bash Obama, he helped the country stagnate. Now the republicans want to make things worse. At least he's grown beyond that.
Unfortunately the crocodile tears we see shed for his departure may turn real as the quality of our congressional representatives continues to exacerbate!
13
I swear, Maureen, at times it seems as though you're fabricating some of these quotes out of whole cloth. Overall, however, your piece resounds with a ring of authenticity and undeniable plausibility.
3
I can't read Maureen Dowd anymore without regretting yet another wasted five minutes. If the Times wants to trivialize the news with formulaic snark, hire Dave Barry. He's good at it.
3
This is a great take on an absurd situation. Well, done, Mo!
11
While I feel a little sorry for Kevin, I am sure it will be covered up by some other big deal soon; maybe Trump will give a speech or something. Speaking the truth is a good thing though, something they rarely do. I have a feeling that he will be challenged for the speaker position due to the truthful statement he made. Hopefully the republicans dont shut down the government their next chance just because of Planned Parenthood and the phony video. I have a feeling that there are some republican women who use PP for their health care and would really hate to see it close. Also, what is wrong with using the tissues for medical research that might help find cures for ALS, Alzheimers, Parkinsons, and oh so many diseases.
good column Maureen.
good column Maureen.
6
Wow! Excellent! This is exactly why I subscribe to the NYT. There is nothing like wit and satire to put these pompous personalities into their places. A lot like Mark Twain. Thank you.
9
Pretty funny....you are kidding right? Or....ono......????!!!!
3
Thank you for the interesting, humorous column. It is a good read.
2
I thought this was a delightful piece of writing: imaginative, spot on about issues of political dynamics of House GOP and fun to read. Thank you.
4
NYT, this is just tiresome.
4
Giggle...I loved it.Thanks.
1
That was hilarious! This was one of your best ever. Thanks for the laughs Mo!
7
John Boehner cemented his lousy legacy by inviting Bibi to Capitol Hill to lobby Congress to sabotage President Obama's foreign policy initiative. Speaker Boehner sat on his hands and buried a no-brainer immigration deal on his desk. He called the roll for three-score votes to repeal the ACA. He demonstrates zero leadership and allowed the Tea Party fringe to subvert his agenda, whatever that was. So now we have Kevin McCarthy on deck. Thanks John. For nothing.
35
As good-bye go, Ms. Dowd's to Mr. Boehner is relatively mild, She compares him to Dean Martin, It was difficult to dislike Dino, and it is difficult to dislike Mr. Boehner either. He WILL allow both Planned Parenthood to be funded, along with the rest of the Federal government, at least until the end of December. Then we can all go back to gnashing our teeth because whoever replaces him will not only have no more luck, or skill, corralling the House to do his bidding, he will have even less. Is gridlock about to get a whole lot worse in Washington, DC? It looks that way.
We are now in the thrall of a dedicated group of far-right fiscal fanatics, loosely known as the Tea Party, although their roots go back much further than that amorphous group. These people are so rabidly against Big Government when it means Taxes and Deficit Funding that they are willing to repeatedly shut down the Federal government rather than compromise with more moderate politicians. Their destructive obstructionism has caused a political paralysis of America which is destroying us. I don't see how we get past it except by convincing those now voting for these fanatics in their home districts to stop saying yes to extremism, in the name of saving our country. Politics is the art of the possible. This happens only when politicians are willing to compromise with each other. Absent this, our great nation dies.
156
I'm afraid there is no way anybody can convince these fanatics to stop supporting extremism--it's not going to happen. We need to get rid of the gerrymandered districts and we need publicly financed elections. Desperately.
2
Boehner's just a bit like the old Soviet Union. Gonna miss him when he's gone.
6
Cry me a river. You reap what you sow, GOP & Oh, Orange One. And what you've reaped are more Tea Party nutjobs than anyone can shake a stick at, along with xenophobes/liars/CEO trust fund twins Donald & Carly. The revolving door back to lobbyist awaits, Mr. Boehner. Even a flock of bluebirds pooping on your shoulder won't deter you. Run away, run away. Coward.
13
Why do I get the feeling that John Boehner is going to be enjoying that Camel Ultra Light more than ever when McCarthy takes over?
John Boehner will probably never have looked so good. Puff, puff. How scary is that? And the cigarette butt gets cheerfully stomped out by Boehner. He grins, walks away, and does not look back.
John Boehner will probably never have looked so good. Puff, puff. How scary is that? And the cigarette butt gets cheerfully stomped out by Boehner. He grins, walks away, and does not look back.
3
The worst writer in the history of this newspaper.
3
It ain't funny any more. The congress critters, including Boehner, are doing what their rich paymasters want. They do not care about the common good.
Membership in congress should be a sacred trust, not an opportunity to get rich. Any member who accepts anything from anyone should go to jail. That should be a lifelong prohibition so let's double their pensions. We can provide public funding for TV and other opportunities for candidates to explain their ideas, just as all other advanced countries do.
But the bribery casino that is Washington is un-American and should be derailed.
To see this and other good ideas, go to YouTube and watch Comedy Party Platform (2 min 9 sec). Then send a buck to Bernie Sanders and invite me to speak to your group. Thanks.
Membership in congress should be a sacred trust, not an opportunity to get rich. Any member who accepts anything from anyone should go to jail. That should be a lifelong prohibition so let's double their pensions. We can provide public funding for TV and other opportunities for candidates to explain their ideas, just as all other advanced countries do.
But the bribery casino that is Washington is un-American and should be derailed.
To see this and other good ideas, go to YouTube and watch Comedy Party Platform (2 min 9 sec). Then send a buck to Bernie Sanders and invite me to speak to your group. Thanks.
2
Maureen, you've been hacking their brains, babe! Keep up the good work!
3
Omg omg this is truly epic, hilarious. Thanks for a good laugh Maureen! Trickle inducing laugh!
7
Well, contrary to what the media tries to make it out to be, Kevin did not say that the Benghazi committee was set up to bring down Hillary in her poll numbers and favorability ratings. What he meant to say but did not say elegantly was that Hillary is not a done deal and that any of the candidates on the right could win against her if she were the nominee.
Right now, like it or not, Bernie Sanders (sorry Rima Rigas and Karen Garcia) is unelectable what with his grumpy old-man-ness and his firebrand socialist background, and Hillary is done like dinner what with her servergate and our Clinton-fatigue.
So, Hello, Republican president in 2017!
Right now, like it or not, Bernie Sanders (sorry Rima Rigas and Karen Garcia) is unelectable what with his grumpy old-man-ness and his firebrand socialist background, and Hillary is done like dinner what with her servergate and our Clinton-fatigue.
So, Hello, Republican president in 2017!
1
Funny and very insightful.
Turning a cartoon character into an even more memorable one takes panache and imagination, not to mention a scathing wit. Finally, Maureen has deployed her weaponry against one truly worthy.
6
My, Gawd, Maureen, you actually mentioned Hillary Clinton and were not critical. Hallelujah.
16
Thank, Kevin McCarthy, you IDIOT! You may have just gotten the empty pant-suit elected. Lamebrain indeed! To quote Homer J. Simpson, "Did I think that or just say it?" Here is a guy that is dumber than Homer.
1
Do we thank him for leaving the house to someone who will become a big star if he just "Acts Naturally?"
The next speaker from the intellectual and clean air capitol of California.
The Boehner saga would make a good opera, the tenor baritone (him) tries to prevent the soprano (Potty Tea) from going to bed with the tenor (the Senate.) They all die from taking poison, (right wing prevarications) and leave the bass looking for a new kingdom.
The next speaker from the intellectual and clean air capitol of California.
The Boehner saga would make a good opera, the tenor baritone (him) tries to prevent the soprano (Potty Tea) from going to bed with the tenor (the Senate.) They all die from taking poison, (right wing prevarications) and leave the bass looking for a new kingdom.
1
Ah! the power of satire, deftly written, Maureen. I am thoroughly depressed now ... as I should be. The stakes are high, and we had better all be paying good attention.
I clicked on the Hannity link and watched a guy with a haircut that screamed "Money!" and a suit that screamed "Money!" harangue the wannabe next Speaker of the House to defund Planned Parenthood; defund Obamacare; defund executive amnesty and immigration; and undo the Iran deal. Now, where would that leave women and the poor?
At this point in my life, mean spiritedness to the point of evil should not still shock me, but it does. I say we should work even harder to defend Planned Parenthood; defend Obamacare; defend executive amnesty and immigration; and support the Iran treaty.
Fake John Boehner is right about one thing. There was a day when senators and legislators understood the art of compromise and the necessity of working together to get things done. Those were the great ones, who moved the democracy towards greater equality. And that is pretty much the goal of democracy.
I clicked on the Hannity link and watched a guy with a haircut that screamed "Money!" and a suit that screamed "Money!" harangue the wannabe next Speaker of the House to defund Planned Parenthood; defund Obamacare; defund executive amnesty and immigration; and undo the Iran deal. Now, where would that leave women and the poor?
At this point in my life, mean spiritedness to the point of evil should not still shock me, but it does. I say we should work even harder to defend Planned Parenthood; defend Obamacare; defend executive amnesty and immigration; and support the Iran treaty.
Fake John Boehner is right about one thing. There was a day when senators and legislators understood the art of compromise and the necessity of working together to get things done. Those were the great ones, who moved the democracy towards greater equality. And that is pretty much the goal of democracy.
19
I presume we all know that on the night of Obama's first inaugural the Republicans met to plan their perpetual attack on him. Later they turned 180 degrees and blamed Obama for everything they did or tried to do.
4
The real prize coming out of Boehner's resignation announcement was Rep McCarthy's admission on Hannity that the entire Benghazi hearings, lasting longer than Watergate, is 100% politically driven to discredit Hilary Clinton.
The Clinton campaign finally got a break even as Boehner is free of his burdens in dealing with the crazy wing of the GOP.
The Clinton campaign finally got a break even as Boehner is free of his burdens in dealing with the crazy wing of the GOP.
21
Watch for Hillary Clinton to be, oh, so tempted to quote you, Maureen, when she next faces that sham of a House select committee!
2
I had no idea that John Boehner monopolized a conversation so completely, even one with Kevin McCarthy, not the sharpest pencil in the desk.
And not for the first time, I find highly suspicious and a bit disquieting Maureen’s close familiarity with a fantasy magician epic aimed at children.
But I see no exorcism, and would normally sue for false advertising. The House will go on, whether or not Boehner’s life proceeds distinct from it, so he’s exorcised nothing. He’s merely resolved to take himself out of the game which is a different (and far more boring) thing altogether.
Heaven help us all: Kevin McCarthy of all people.
And not for the first time, I find highly suspicious and a bit disquieting Maureen’s close familiarity with a fantasy magician epic aimed at children.
But I see no exorcism, and would normally sue for false advertising. The House will go on, whether or not Boehner’s life proceeds distinct from it, so he’s exorcised nothing. He’s merely resolved to take himself out of the game which is a different (and far more boring) thing altogether.
Heaven help us all: Kevin McCarthy of all people.
6
Awesome column this week Ms. Dowd.
This is much better than a shrill attack upon Obama or Clinton. Keep up the good work.
This is much better than a shrill attack upon Obama or Clinton. Keep up the good work.
3
"A leader who doesn't have anybody following him is just a guy taking a walk."
However, with the Republican infested gerrymandered enclaves of conspiratorial nutcases clamoring for an impeachment of the president, you need not be fluent in policy, you just need to know the latest hatched grand scheme conjured up by the far right.
The Fast and Furious debacle was the first, claiming that Obama was running guns on the boarder with the purpose of increasing more violence thus making the public more susceptible to gun control measures. Darrell Issa was just placating his constituencies.
Next up was Donald Trump with his elaborate conspiracy of Obama's place of origin. He and Sheriff Joe Appio sent investigators to Kenya to sound the death knell of Obama and there was much rejoicing on social media from the "We want our country back" conspirators.
This was followed up with the "let me see Obama's college records" enthusiasts bent on denying Obama a second term.
And now we have the Benghazi tragedy and the deaths of four Americans, with the gleeful pursuit of another Obama conspiracy of secretly running guns to the Muslim Brotherhood, because don't you know, but Obama is a Secret Muslim himself.
Give the people what they want is the modus operandi for today's Republican party. Too bad the Lebanon marine barracks bombing or the Iran-Contra scandal didn't happen under Obama's watch, but on Saint Reagan's.
If it had, they'd be lighting bonfires of celebration.
However, with the Republican infested gerrymandered enclaves of conspiratorial nutcases clamoring for an impeachment of the president, you need not be fluent in policy, you just need to know the latest hatched grand scheme conjured up by the far right.
The Fast and Furious debacle was the first, claiming that Obama was running guns on the boarder with the purpose of increasing more violence thus making the public more susceptible to gun control measures. Darrell Issa was just placating his constituencies.
Next up was Donald Trump with his elaborate conspiracy of Obama's place of origin. He and Sheriff Joe Appio sent investigators to Kenya to sound the death knell of Obama and there was much rejoicing on social media from the "We want our country back" conspirators.
This was followed up with the "let me see Obama's college records" enthusiasts bent on denying Obama a second term.
And now we have the Benghazi tragedy and the deaths of four Americans, with the gleeful pursuit of another Obama conspiracy of secretly running guns to the Muslim Brotherhood, because don't you know, but Obama is a Secret Muslim himself.
Give the people what they want is the modus operandi for today's Republican party. Too bad the Lebanon marine barracks bombing or the Iran-Contra scandal didn't happen under Obama's watch, but on Saint Reagan's.
If it had, they'd be lighting bonfires of celebration.
25
Good laughs, Maureen. Nice column.
14
It seems like Speaker Boehner is a nice enough man, but what a lousy Speaker. He recruited the very extreme rightwing crazies, who then turned against him. But, he also stuck to the Hastert Rule, made up by the discredited former Speaker, who has been indicted for paying off a former student who accused him of sexual abuse. The rule is that Republicans can't pass a bill if they don't have a majority of Republicans backing the bill.
Speaker Boehner helped create this monstrous, obstructionist Republican mess.
Thanks for nothing, Speaker Boehner.
Speaker Boehner helped create this monstrous, obstructionist Republican mess.
Thanks for nothing, Speaker Boehner.
46
In hindsight, though, he does look like the last adult in the GOP romper room.
1
It's puzzling to see a man like John Boehner portrayed as some kind of moderate, who grew weary of fighting crazed right wingers in the House. He did, after all, earn enough of their votes as Speaker to stay in office for years.
It's not really necessary for survival as a Republican to be "pro life", or talk like a big box preacher. All you have to do is support bombings, invasions, tax cutss for the rich, and continued coddling of the oil, coal, and natural gas companies that are funneling money to everybody in the Republican Party.
The fact that 90% of Republicans in Congress and on the debate podia deny global warming tells us all we need to know. It's not that they have less knowledge than a high school chemistry student. They are the employees of the fossil fuel companies, and even Trump fears them.
Remember, David Koch basically invented the Tea Party, and funneled money to everyone who supported it. Koch himself knows its members are idiots, just as Exxon knew all about global warming by the early 1980's. They are crazed with greed, twisting all of their actions.
The best historical precursors are the Bourbons in the court of Louis XVI. The guillotine surprised them, but they were still determined to kneel down in their powdered wigs and silk clothes. Too bad they're taking us with them this time around.
It's not really necessary for survival as a Republican to be "pro life", or talk like a big box preacher. All you have to do is support bombings, invasions, tax cutss for the rich, and continued coddling of the oil, coal, and natural gas companies that are funneling money to everybody in the Republican Party.
The fact that 90% of Republicans in Congress and on the debate podia deny global warming tells us all we need to know. It's not that they have less knowledge than a high school chemistry student. They are the employees of the fossil fuel companies, and even Trump fears them.
Remember, David Koch basically invented the Tea Party, and funneled money to everyone who supported it. Koch himself knows its members are idiots, just as Exxon knew all about global warming by the early 1980's. They are crazed with greed, twisting all of their actions.
The best historical precursors are the Bourbons in the court of Louis XVI. The guillotine surprised them, but they were still determined to kneel down in their powdered wigs and silk clothes. Too bad they're taking us with them this time around.
166
BRAVO Mike Roddy!
You hit the nail on the head.
It's all about the money.
Busy Mr. Green, running around up on that Hill is making the GOP crazies even crazier.
Thank you for a very refreshing read.
Terminally sad, but refreshing.
You hit the nail on the head.
It's all about the money.
Busy Mr. Green, running around up on that Hill is making the GOP crazies even crazier.
Thank you for a very refreshing read.
Terminally sad, but refreshing.
2
"We hope President Obama will now respect the will of the people, change course, and commit to making the changes they are demanding.
To the extent he is willing to do this, we are ready to work with him"
John Boehner, it is going to take more than the exorcism of demons, more than the tears. It is going to take a prayerful confession to the priest for the number of promises and commandments broken in the name of the American people.
But even before that confession and penance you might just try to bring legislation concerning the issue of guns to the floor for a vote.
Not possible, you say with the Haster Rule etc....well then guess the exorcism did not work after all.
To the extent he is willing to do this, we are ready to work with him"
John Boehner, it is going to take more than the exorcism of demons, more than the tears. It is going to take a prayerful confession to the priest for the number of promises and commandments broken in the name of the American people.
But even before that confession and penance you might just try to bring legislation concerning the issue of guns to the floor for a vote.
Not possible, you say with the Haster Rule etc....well then guess the exorcism did not work after all.
151
It's Hastert, and not a good time to call upon his name.
By going from 25,000 laws to 25,001 all the problems will be solved? First thing Fahey should figure out is why all the big liberal cities with all their laws against everyday people being armed cannot even hope to ever enforce the gun laws they have.
Solve that one and we'll be comparing you to Elon Musk. It's all the corrup old Dem machines - Chicago, Washington, D.C., NYC, St. Louis, Baltimore, L.A., Atlanta, etc. Not enough cops or prosecutors or jail space?
Oh, and what is it with the 200 years of Democrats swearing never to let black heads of household have guns? That is another entire question. Except for the South, you just never see black parents legally armed. Are the Dems all racist?
Solve that one and we'll be comparing you to Elon Musk. It's all the corrup old Dem machines - Chicago, Washington, D.C., NYC, St. Louis, Baltimore, L.A., Atlanta, etc. Not enough cops or prosecutors or jail space?
Oh, and what is it with the 200 years of Democrats swearing never to let black heads of household have guns? That is another entire question. Except for the South, you just never see black parents legally armed. Are the Dems all racist?
"Paul Ryan, who can’t pull the trigger"
He pulled the trigger. He ran for Vice President, and was crushed.
It seems he learned a lesson.
Better to keep cashing in on those donors, than to end your run by going down to defeat in flames. See also Eric Cantor as object lesson.
He pulled the trigger. He ran for Vice President, and was crushed.
It seems he learned a lesson.
Better to keep cashing in on those donors, than to end your run by going down to defeat in flames. See also Eric Cantor as object lesson.
143
Hey Mark do you realize how close we came to having our first Jewish House Speaker if only Eric Cantor had won his primary in Virginia and retained his House Seat?
Sharon5101 -- Many of our very best Supreme Court Justices were Jewish, and the current ones are great, but that is not because they are Jewish.
Bernie Sanders is Jewish, and would make a wonderful President. He'll get my vote, but not just because he's Jewish. He's great.
For years Levin was my Senator, and he always got my vote.
Not Cantor. And not because he's Jewish or not.
For many of us, that really isn't the issue.
Bernie Sanders is Jewish, and would make a wonderful President. He'll get my vote, but not just because he's Jewish. He's great.
For years Levin was my Senator, and he always got my vote.
Not Cantor. And not because he's Jewish or not.
For many of us, that really isn't the issue.
12
Why should we care about having a Jewish speaker any more than any other religion?
The Constitution expressly forbids any form a religious test to hold federal office.
The Constitution expressly forbids any form a religious test to hold federal office.
9
LOL! A delightful column.
But I feel sorry for Kevin. Burnishing his credentials at the Faux News to some brain dead even before he got the gig means he's running scared. Why, crazies don't have loyalty. So is this an act of masochism?
Like him or not, at least the Speaker is sane and seasoned. Indeed the Pope can perform miracle to light th way. Why dealing with a bunch of newbie crazies when you can sit on a few boards and give speeches. Heck, if a half-wit half-term ex-governor of Alaska could command a nice engagement fees, surely he doesn't have to do Dancing with the stars.
Don't count on President Obama out yet though, Ms Dowd. People have called him a lame duck for a couple of years now but Obamacare and same sex marriage are secure, the economy is holding on in spite of global weakness and TPA is in the work. Something for everyone. This is how America should work, no one got everything and many got something. Sure, probably Mr Obama regrets he hasn't made any progress in gun control and other stuff. But he has sown the seeds, someone has to follow through. That makes the next election so much more important.
But I feel sorry for Kevin. Burnishing his credentials at the Faux News to some brain dead even before he got the gig means he's running scared. Why, crazies don't have loyalty. So is this an act of masochism?
Like him or not, at least the Speaker is sane and seasoned. Indeed the Pope can perform miracle to light th way. Why dealing with a bunch of newbie crazies when you can sit on a few boards and give speeches. Heck, if a half-wit half-term ex-governor of Alaska could command a nice engagement fees, surely he doesn't have to do Dancing with the stars.
Don't count on President Obama out yet though, Ms Dowd. People have called him a lame duck for a couple of years now but Obamacare and same sex marriage are secure, the economy is holding on in spite of global weakness and TPA is in the work. Something for everyone. This is how America should work, no one got everything and many got something. Sure, probably Mr Obama regrets he hasn't made any progress in gun control and other stuff. But he has sown the seeds, someone has to follow through. That makes the next election so much more important.
288
Yes....go Obama and demos....
2
Remember in May and June when Ms Dowd was writing about the lame duck President . Didn't turn out that way , did it ?
12
TPP is bad for everyone but the oligarchs and corporations.
6
Unfortunately, Boehner's demons persist even after the exorcism, since Boehner says McCarthy " would make an excellent speaker ".
94
Maureen, Doll Face, this column was truly worth reading you for all these years. I'm an R and I was LOL all the way through because what you wrote is true. Thanks again Kid!
106
Masterful, hilarious writing, Ms. Dowd, pitch perfect to the last puff of smoke.
Yet, there is also the Boehner who killed the 2013 immigration bill. It is instructive to contrast this column with the post that Toobin published this week for the New Yorker. It would have been one thing if Boehner had disagreed with the goals of the "Gang of Eight," or if he did not sincerely believe immigration reform was very likely "good for both his party and his country." He'd have been wrong on the merits, but principled in his stand, as there was no small pressure on him from GOP elites to show the party had learned something (anything???) from its 2012 defeat.
Yet, the pro-business Boehner found this was one bill he wouldn't tee up, when everyone knows it would have easily passed the House, perhaps with support from several dozen Republicans, if he had simply allowed it to come to a vote. Certainly, some of the hard-right back-benchers would have bellowed their displeasure and perhaps tried to remove him from his position, but he could have done a real constructive thing for the country.
It was Boehner's misfortune to directly follow one of the nation's greatest speakers, but that doesn't excuse his utter lack of nerve on the 2013 bill. He put the extremists ahead of his country, which only enabled them to continue to undermine his attempt at rule/governing until he had finally had enough. Toobin is right: his legacy is one of failure, mostly due to an absence of political courage.
Yet, there is also the Boehner who killed the 2013 immigration bill. It is instructive to contrast this column with the post that Toobin published this week for the New Yorker. It would have been one thing if Boehner had disagreed with the goals of the "Gang of Eight," or if he did not sincerely believe immigration reform was very likely "good for both his party and his country." He'd have been wrong on the merits, but principled in his stand, as there was no small pressure on him from GOP elites to show the party had learned something (anything???) from its 2012 defeat.
Yet, the pro-business Boehner found this was one bill he wouldn't tee up, when everyone knows it would have easily passed the House, perhaps with support from several dozen Republicans, if he had simply allowed it to come to a vote. Certainly, some of the hard-right back-benchers would have bellowed their displeasure and perhaps tried to remove him from his position, but he could have done a real constructive thing for the country.
It was Boehner's misfortune to directly follow one of the nation's greatest speakers, but that doesn't excuse his utter lack of nerve on the 2013 bill. He put the extremists ahead of his country, which only enabled them to continue to undermine his attempt at rule/governing until he had finally had enough. Toobin is right: his legacy is one of failure, mostly due to an absence of political courage.
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I would posit Boehner had to clean up the mess left by "one of the nation's greatest speakers."
Thank gosh for Boehner stopping immigration "reform." As we can see now, it will be up to the next Republican President to clean up the overall mess left with the health care debacle, the foreign policy failure, our overwhelming problem of illegal aliens and concentrate on taking care of the current citizen who need the help first.
Thank gosh for Boehner stopping immigration "reform." As we can see now, it will be up to the next Republican President to clean up the overall mess left with the health care debacle, the foreign policy failure, our overwhelming problem of illegal aliens and concentrate on taking care of the current citizen who need the help first.
Boehner's legacy is indeed one of failure.
Not because of an absence of political courage but because of an absence of ability.
His efforts to pass something good, or stop one atrocity after another from the Obama administration, failed over and over. He squandered the power of the purse playing slugfest with bludgeons instead of doing any kind of competent fencing. Every time he let the situation get to the point where the anti-Americans in the cheap seats are whining about a "government shutdown!" he had long since messed up.
The Republicans stopped Hillarycare with Democrats in control in both houses of Congress AND the White House. With two houses of Congress, a better speaker could have saved the country from any number of crimes Boehner has been unable to stop.
Not because of an absence of political courage but because of an absence of ability.
His efforts to pass something good, or stop one atrocity after another from the Obama administration, failed over and over. He squandered the power of the purse playing slugfest with bludgeons instead of doing any kind of competent fencing. Every time he let the situation get to the point where the anti-Americans in the cheap seats are whining about a "government shutdown!" he had long since messed up.
The Republicans stopped Hillarycare with Democrats in control in both houses of Congress AND the White House. With two houses of Congress, a better speaker could have saved the country from any number of crimes Boehner has been unable to stop.
20
Boehner's legacy is cowardice, thanks.
5
If Pope Francis' exorcism is complete, can we now officially call McConnell a spook?
45
Then Boehner throws his Camel lite on the carpet in his office, slams the door, and cranks up The Talking Heads' Burning Down the House as high as it will go, as he heads to the golf course.
Thanks for Nothing, John!
Thanks for Nothing, John!
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See this here? This here is funnier and more insightful than Maureen Dowd's whole column.
5
You neglected to include his crushing out that last cigarette, grinding it into the carpet with the toe of his no doubt quite expensive shoe.
1
"...you made him look like a chump as the head of the House Select Committee to Drive Down Hillary’s Poll Numbers."
"I need to try one last time to strike some kind of bargain with Obama before I leave and he becomes an even lamer duck. We’ve at least got to increase the federal debt limit to keep these clowns from tanking the economy. After all, I’m gonna need dough too."
Probably two of the most honest fictional statements Mr. Boehner has ever made. Maybe the only ones, fictional or not, come to think of it.
"I need to try one last time to strike some kind of bargain with Obama before I leave and he becomes an even lamer duck. We’ve at least got to increase the federal debt limit to keep these clowns from tanking the economy. After all, I’m gonna need dough too."
Probably two of the most honest fictional statements Mr. Boehner has ever made. Maybe the only ones, fictional or not, come to think of it.
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Oh... O am sure Mr Boehner has plenty of dough re: meee stashed away...plenty
1
More debt would save the economy? Either I need to convert all my twenties into silver coins tomorrow or Boehner's brain is back in Ohio with his heart. I do not understand this man.
Ms. Dowd carefully ignores that a weak and terrible Speaker Boehner
was. He couldn't deliver a pizza let along his House caucus.
He managed to prevent one third of our government from doing
anything except vote to repeal the ACA a zillion times and spent
millions investigating Benghazi for the sole purpose of taxpayer
funded character assassination against Hillary Clinton.
HIs departure is a case of addition by subtraction.
OF course, it will probably get worse under his successor.
Just where is the replacement for the ACA? Oh yeah, it's with
the videos that don't exist except in the head of Carly FIorina.
Dean Martin had talent. MS. Dowd owes him an apology.
was. He couldn't deliver a pizza let along his House caucus.
He managed to prevent one third of our government from doing
anything except vote to repeal the ACA a zillion times and spent
millions investigating Benghazi for the sole purpose of taxpayer
funded character assassination against Hillary Clinton.
HIs departure is a case of addition by subtraction.
OF course, it will probably get worse under his successor.
Just where is the replacement for the ACA? Oh yeah, it's with
the videos that don't exist except in the head of Carly FIorina.
Dean Martin had talent. MS. Dowd owes him an apology.
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The country didn't do any favors with what they sent to Washington as representation.
2
Oh, please, spare us the Democrats' dishonest talking points.
The administration-wide trail of lies sleaze and deception that surrounded the murders of four Americans in Benghazi is one that only dogged pursuit by patriots in Congress has only begun to uncover. "Character assassination?" Oh Hillary has done plenty of that to herself already.
As for a "replacement" for the ACA...
That would be "NOT ACA."
...Starting with a system in which ACA doesn't exist to destroy the health care system. Any fine tuning can wait until Boehner's more competent successor or a successor's successor achieves at least that much.
And to deny the Planned Parenthood videos exist is simple cognitive dissonance. Of course they exist. If you have trouble finding them, here they are https://www.youtube.com/user/centerformedprogress
Yes, they exist. Yes they're real.
Any other nonsense you want to spew?
The administration-wide trail of lies sleaze and deception that surrounded the murders of four Americans in Benghazi is one that only dogged pursuit by patriots in Congress has only begun to uncover. "Character assassination?" Oh Hillary has done plenty of that to herself already.
As for a "replacement" for the ACA...
That would be "NOT ACA."
...Starting with a system in which ACA doesn't exist to destroy the health care system. Any fine tuning can wait until Boehner's more competent successor or a successor's successor achieves at least that much.
And to deny the Planned Parenthood videos exist is simple cognitive dissonance. Of course they exist. If you have trouble finding them, here they are https://www.youtube.com/user/centerformedprogress
Yes, they exist. Yes they're real.
Any other nonsense you want to spew?
3
Chris, Atlanta,
Where was your outrage over the 13 attacks on US Embassies and 60 deaths that occurred during the eight years of the George W. Bush administration?
Where was your outrage over the 13 attacks on US Embassies and 60 deaths that occurred during the eight years of the George W. Bush administration?
20
I think you've given far too much credit to the soon-to-be-former speaker.
Other than that, right on...
Other than that, right on...
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Your best column ever and no comments? Is everyone too stunned by the truth of what we may be facing? I guess it is like watching and hoping that severe alcoholic relative is going to get sober, and sadly realizing that they haven't hit bottom yet. Those Americans who keep voting against their own interests may not wake up until more people are working for starvation wages, the ordinary among us are paying fees for services that used to come with our taxes like school and fire and police protection, only the wealthy can afford to go to National Parks (although some of them will have been sold off to oligarchs as private playgrounds) and we have to hope that Doctors without Borders will come here for some minimal medical care.
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Susan, I finally figured out that Saturday night comments don't get posted until the moderator has gone through them after a good night's sleep. Early morning comments sometimes wait until the moderator's second cup of coffee. It's not that no one has commented.
Stop it, Maureen.
You are going to make me cry...
You are going to make me cry...
35
John Boehner had the unfortunate experience of dealing with Liar-in-Chief Obama and liars for Obama in the House. While he's a skilled fund raiser, political insider and consensus builder, Boehner just doesn't have the personality needed to deal with a sociopath like Obama.
Neither does Kevin McCarthy. At first glance, he appeared to be a good potential spokesman for the party. But it turns out he was reading scripts and repeating talking points created by others.
On his own, McCarthy sounds like a nice Joe Biden, otherwise known as the gaff man who gets nasty when he's in a debate and doesn't know what else to say. (See Biden-Ryan debates in 2012).
So who should be speaker? Will it matter?
Neither does Kevin McCarthy. At first glance, he appeared to be a good potential spokesman for the party. But it turns out he was reading scripts and repeating talking points created by others.
On his own, McCarthy sounds like a nice Joe Biden, otherwise known as the gaff man who gets nasty when he's in a debate and doesn't know what else to say. (See Biden-Ryan debates in 2012).
So who should be speaker? Will it matter?
8
Liar in chief, great one.
Sorry you have grievously misplaced your anger at Washington, the real problems aren't too difficult to see.
Sorry you have grievously misplaced your anger at Washington, the real problems aren't too difficult to see.
15
@Donald Johnson: Is there any Republican failure you people don't blame on Obama?
49
You think the President is a sociopath? Don't you think that is over-the-top? No, over the mountain? Mr. Obama is an honest and decent man. You can disagree with him, but disagreements do not a mentally ill opponent make.
This kind of rhetoric only hurts our democracy.
This kind of rhetoric only hurts our democracy.
43
With Boehner gone we will all see
His successor as an enemy
Fair skinned and dry eyed
With Koch money supplied,
We'll rue John as a retiree.
His successor as an enemy
Fair skinned and dry eyed
With Koch money supplied,
We'll rue John as a retiree.
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Larry, your continual wit, whimsy, and couplets continue to amuse, but there wasn't any of your very potent sarcasm. And, yes, this devil that we knew will most likely be succeeded by one we'll rue even more. But, to paraphrase a previous comment in a different column, maybe America hasn't to really "hit bottom" (not a Shakespearian reference) yet.
Johnny B. hated Social Security and most of the other innovations FDR put in place, even though Johnny B. may have been on the breadlines if FDR's innovations hadn't saved his Dad's Tavern and made Johnny B's future success a whole lot easier. (Yikes, dd I just say that Boehner didn't "make" his own success?, what a liberal dupe I am).
So what I'm really saying is this, amusing as ypur rhyme was, I missed your usual acerbic indignation.
Johnny B. hated Social Security and most of the other innovations FDR put in place, even though Johnny B. may have been on the breadlines if FDR's innovations hadn't saved his Dad's Tavern and made Johnny B's future success a whole lot easier. (Yikes, dd I just say that Boehner didn't "make" his own success?, what a liberal dupe I am).
So what I'm really saying is this, amusing as ypur rhyme was, I missed your usual acerbic indignation.
5
Dude, love your stuff, but read something on scansion. Or maybe Auden. Or "Hudibrastics."
Try:
With Boehner departed, we will soon see
His successor as foul enemy
Full fair of skin, and quite dry-eyed
And in Koch lucre full supplied
Tear'd John's Departure soon we'll rue
And in deaths of students find our view.
Try:
With Boehner departed, we will soon see
His successor as foul enemy
Full fair of skin, and quite dry-eyed
And in Koch lucre full supplied
Tear'd John's Departure soon we'll rue
And in deaths of students find our view.
8
I wouldn’t be so sure that the flea-infested Boehner is above the dogs he went to bed with. If he had any concerns about honor and integrity and working with idiots, he’d have changed parties long ago. These Republicans are his ethical, ideological and intellectual equals. Only in Ms. Dowd’s amusing fantasy piece does he have qualms and second thoughts and regrets.
In an alternate reality he could have been a contender, instead of a bum. He could have led the honorable opposition and gotten things done. He was instead complicit in letting Tea Party bullies into the china shop, thinking they would energize a moribund G.O.P. while bringing low-information voters, racists, conspiracy theorists, fundamentalists and zealots in tow. I hope the tears Boehner so often sheds have been in recognition of the shambles he’s helped to make of democratic governance.
The only good to come from Boehner’s resignation may be the installation of a new Speaker who doesn’t know how to hide the malevolent motives of the rabid right quite so well. We knew that the Benghazi investigation was a sham from the get-go, and it’s a little insulting if he thinks that Kevin McCarthy let the cat out of the bag. That cat has been bagless since day one.
Still, he can’t blame McCarthy for not realizing that the speaker’s job isn’t to dissemble and to twist the truth until it breaks. It’s been pretty obvious to everyone for a very long time.
In an alternate reality he could have been a contender, instead of a bum. He could have led the honorable opposition and gotten things done. He was instead complicit in letting Tea Party bullies into the china shop, thinking they would energize a moribund G.O.P. while bringing low-information voters, racists, conspiracy theorists, fundamentalists and zealots in tow. I hope the tears Boehner so often sheds have been in recognition of the shambles he’s helped to make of democratic governance.
The only good to come from Boehner’s resignation may be the installation of a new Speaker who doesn’t know how to hide the malevolent motives of the rabid right quite so well. We knew that the Benghazi investigation was a sham from the get-go, and it’s a little insulting if he thinks that Kevin McCarthy let the cat out of the bag. That cat has been bagless since day one.
Still, he can’t blame McCarthy for not realizing that the speaker’s job isn’t to dissemble and to twist the truth until it breaks. It’s been pretty obvious to everyone for a very long time.
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With more than half the congress spinning their heads 360 degrees and vomiting pea soup on meaningful legislation, I don't think it matters who's the speaker.
7