America has a slim chance of pulling out of the nosedive the Republicans put us in when the $upreme Court elected Bush-Cheney in the 2000 election. But only if McConnell & Boehner & their band of idiots implode the Republican Party over the next two years. The chances are very good that will happen.
A light study of American history shows that when Republicans get all the power they go nuts & while ruining the country they also manage to shoot themselves in the foot....both feet, heart & brain too!
Mr. Husky Orange & Turtle Mitch are preparing to replay Bill Clinton's 2nd term for us. Remember how fun that was? Remember how many millions Republicans spent trying to torpedo Bill Clinton? Remember how it didn't work?
Since the impossible aim of the GOP is to kill government for the benefit of their Oligarch owners who are always served best by the status quo, they'll settle for stopping any meaningful legislation by obstructing, stonewalling & tying up both houses of government introducing ridiculous, redundant bills & votes, launching multiple witch hunts in the form of special investigations & starting impeachment proceedings. Think about it....you've seen this movie before.
The Republicans will waste the next 2 years & then start all over again when Hillary wins in 2016. It's all they got. Fun for them, murder for the working class.
The lone black Superman in the White House is the only thing preventing Koch-America. Je Suis Obama
A light study of American history shows that when Republicans get all the power they go nuts & while ruining the country they also manage to shoot themselves in the foot....both feet, heart & brain too!
Mr. Husky Orange & Turtle Mitch are preparing to replay Bill Clinton's 2nd term for us. Remember how fun that was? Remember how many millions Republicans spent trying to torpedo Bill Clinton? Remember how it didn't work?
Since the impossible aim of the GOP is to kill government for the benefit of their Oligarch owners who are always served best by the status quo, they'll settle for stopping any meaningful legislation by obstructing, stonewalling & tying up both houses of government introducing ridiculous, redundant bills & votes, launching multiple witch hunts in the form of special investigations & starting impeachment proceedings. Think about it....you've seen this movie before.
The Republicans will waste the next 2 years & then start all over again when Hillary wins in 2016. It's all they got. Fun for them, murder for the working class.
The lone black Superman in the White House is the only thing preventing Koch-America. Je Suis Obama
18
Mr Boehner is the classical "suave "of the forties.
2
Maureen, welcome back....good to see the vitriol spray on Boehner.
13
Even at the beginning of what must surely be Boehner's final hurrah as speaker of the House, it's not too early to think about legacies for him and for the President. There is no better embodiment of an Obama's opponent on any issue: Obamacare, Keystone, government shutdown, deficit spending, jobs, Benghazi, school lunches...
Their legacies are intertwined. Obama will be remembered as the President who restored stability and strength to a shattered economy, and the President who steered the U.S. on a steady foreign policy course during an extremely dangerous time. Boehner will be remembered as the most visible leader of the Congress that did nothing except attempt to deny the first African-American President any success in achieving his goals, even to the detriment of the country.
Their legacies are intertwined. Obama will be remembered as the President who restored stability and strength to a shattered economy, and the President who steered the U.S. on a steady foreign policy course during an extremely dangerous time. Boehner will be remembered as the most visible leader of the Congress that did nothing except attempt to deny the first African-American President any success in achieving his goals, even to the detriment of the country.
35
Ms. Dowd, if you don't have either a mole on Boehner's staff or a bug in his smartphone, you're psychic enough to bankrupt any casino or racetrack.
4
Like Ronald Reagan, John Boehner definitely comes off as a likable guy. But also like Reagan, I don't like his ideas on government. And, though I'm sick of Maureen's constant anti-Obama rants, she is absolutely right that Obama should have done more to try and work with his adversaries. The last election much proved that. He also should have reminded people of his very positive accomplishments, which are many and widespread.
8
I've often seen Boehner as a reminder of Dean Martin, in appearance.
People forget that the original Dean was, while evincing one of the most laid back public demeanors, possible, a guy no one messed with. That Dean regularly faced down some of the wise-guys in Sinatra’s entourage and he did it with not much more than a look. For the most part, he kept things nice and quiet around Ol' Blue Eyes. The crooner and comedian out of Steubenville Ohio was a man who could more than take care of himself and rarely had to flex his muscle and the stories are, he only barely had to break a threat, when he did so. In short, nobody messed with him.
Boehner’s not that guy….
People forget that the original Dean was, while evincing one of the most laid back public demeanors, possible, a guy no one messed with. That Dean regularly faced down some of the wise-guys in Sinatra’s entourage and he did it with not much more than a look. For the most part, he kept things nice and quiet around Ol' Blue Eyes. The crooner and comedian out of Steubenville Ohio was a man who could more than take care of himself and rarely had to flex his muscle and the stories are, he only barely had to break a threat, when he did so. In short, nobody messed with him.
Boehner’s not that guy….
17
One of the first two acts of national terror legislation from Speaker Boehner's House of Misrepresentatives will be to pass an XL Pipeline bill that will ship filthy dilbit (diluted bitumen) from the Alberta tar sands over the precious Ogallala water aquifier that waters America's massive heartland.
In an independent report by the University of Nebraska, Professor John Stansbury said Trans Canada had underestimated the time it would take to detect an XL spill and also underestimated worst-case scenarios. Stansbury said it took Enbridge Energy technicians in Edmonton Alberta 17 hours to stop the massive 2010 Kalamazoo River leak. He said just one spill from the Keystone XL could pollute 4.9 billion gallons of Ogallala groundwater -- with the added bonus of just 35 fulltime pipeline jobs added to the economy.
The 2010 Kalamazoo River pipeline burst spilled nearly a million gallons in the Kalamazoo River, closing it for 35 miles. The tear in the pipe was only five inches at its widest point. Within days, the bitumen sank to the river bottom.
At $1 billion, it is already the costliest on-shore cleanup in U.S. history.
John Boehner's Congress' second act of legislative terrorism will entail deporting as many Mexicans as possible, reversing the Dream Act, breaking up as many Mexican-American families as possible and collapsing the available work force of painters, dishwashers, landscapers and agricultural workers.
Mr. Boehner remains the worst House Speaker in modern history.
In an independent report by the University of Nebraska, Professor John Stansbury said Trans Canada had underestimated the time it would take to detect an XL spill and also underestimated worst-case scenarios. Stansbury said it took Enbridge Energy technicians in Edmonton Alberta 17 hours to stop the massive 2010 Kalamazoo River leak. He said just one spill from the Keystone XL could pollute 4.9 billion gallons of Ogallala groundwater -- with the added bonus of just 35 fulltime pipeline jobs added to the economy.
The 2010 Kalamazoo River pipeline burst spilled nearly a million gallons in the Kalamazoo River, closing it for 35 miles. The tear in the pipe was only five inches at its widest point. Within days, the bitumen sank to the river bottom.
At $1 billion, it is already the costliest on-shore cleanup in U.S. history.
John Boehner's Congress' second act of legislative terrorism will entail deporting as many Mexicans as possible, reversing the Dream Act, breaking up as many Mexican-American families as possible and collapsing the available work force of painters, dishwashers, landscapers and agricultural workers.
Mr. Boehner remains the worst House Speaker in modern history.
69
I so get your use of tanning, hammocks, living on upper crust islands in Florida and his habit of smoking, an addiction. Mr. Boehmer is addicted to pleasure, looking good, not actually being good, and self-enhancing at the cost of others. Just so he has what he is addicted to, all is fine in his life. He is also addicted to allowing his self to feeling exceptional good about himself and having malevolent thoughts of those that get in the way of his needs, both personal and political.
26
Maureen should lighten up. Life is not easy when you have Jerry Lewis for a side kick.
7
“It’s still just me, guys,” he sobs, “doing it my way.
Like handing out bribes from the tobacco lobby on the floor of the House.
http://crooksandliars.com/john-amato/john-boehner-admits-giving-bribes-b...
Like handing out bribes from the tobacco lobby on the floor of the House.
http://crooksandliars.com/john-amato/john-boehner-admits-giving-bribes-b...
8
Orange.
The Dutch wear it so much better than Boehner and Christie.
The Dutch wear it so much better than Boehner and Christie.
15
"Ultra Light Camel", an oxymoron if there ever was one. I wonder how many more ultra lights does one have to smoke to get the same nicotine fix as the regular Camels provide. The poor guy!
10
Mo,
If you think John Boehner is as cool as Dino Martini, you need to go back on vacation or book leave!
Still, this was funny. Welcome back.
If you think John Boehner is as cool as Dino Martini, you need to go back on vacation or book leave!
Still, this was funny. Welcome back.
7
Ummm....for the sake of journalistic accuracy...
Dean Martin was Dino, not Deano.
“doing it my way.” is a reference to a Sinatra song, not a Dean Martin one.
Dean Martin was Dino, not Deano.
“doing it my way.” is a reference to a Sinatra song, not a Dean Martin one.
15
I'm wondering about Boehner's orange skin color, could that be linked to some sort of medical condition? I know it always gets played for laughs, but could it be something he can't help, and might actually be a sign of illness?
10
That photo of the Speaker smacking Nancy Pelosi was all the proof we need that Congress is more collegial than they want us to believe. So let the adults rein.
1
Well the "Deano" moniker is at least superficially accurate. Seeing him with a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other, getting his dark orange on is very easy to visualize. His blue collar roots, while not difficult to imagine, his eyes rolling and tears at the end don't match up to his real life performance. He does however preside over a republican house majority with some real savy which, makes me wonder why he bothers: when after all while the lower chamber has always had mavericks and snake oil charmers, the whole party is on its last legs. Nothing constructive is likely to come out of either legislative body in the next two years. It will always be oppose President Obama regardless of the content of his ideas. Poor mouthing his college years as a janitor was the least sympathetic; we've all done the menial jobs at one time or another. He needs to get over it and perhaps decide that some free community college years are a good thing, despite his feeling sorry for himself.
7
Ms. Dowd,
As a native Chicagoan, I must take offense at the suggestion that we dump the bodies of murder victims in Lake Michigan - where our drinking water comes from. Almost without exception, we use the Chicago Park District lagoons for the disposal of inconvenient corpses, although the use of Indiana corn fields DID look promising at one time....
As a native Chicagoan, I must take offense at the suggestion that we dump the bodies of murder victims in Lake Michigan - where our drinking water comes from. Almost without exception, we use the Chicago Park District lagoons for the disposal of inconvenient corpses, although the use of Indiana corn fields DID look promising at one time....
14
Alright! Mo is back! I missed your columns a lot. Everyday of the week, I searched for you in the NYTimes and everyday that you were not there, I threw a hissy fit. But thank God you are back...you are a great satirist.
2
{“So now President Harvard wants to give everybody free community-college educations? Should we do their homework for them, too? I had to work my way through school as a janitor.”}
Typical masculine remark of a Replicant. He did it "all by himself".
He is oblivious to the fact it is far easier to subsidize Tertiary Education, than pay - later on - Unemployment Insurance. There's no hope for this troglodytes, and the next two years will prove how helpless they are.
Still, we've nothing to crow about - barely a third of the electorate bothered to show up at the polls. Such indifference is a callous disrespect of democracy. Even a blank-vote is better than no vote at all.
Typical masculine remark of a Replicant. He did it "all by himself".
He is oblivious to the fact it is far easier to subsidize Tertiary Education, than pay - later on - Unemployment Insurance. There's no hope for this troglodytes, and the next two years will prove how helpless they are.
Still, we've nothing to crow about - barely a third of the electorate bothered to show up at the polls. Such indifference is a callous disrespect of democracy. Even a blank-vote is better than no vote at all.
10
You do Dean Martin a great disservice.
15
I hope that your absence is explained by your finishing the libretto for "Boehner, The Opera."
3
Boehner seems happy with his tight collar and the short leash of his welcomed Tea Party. He may deserve it, but do we?
10
Boehner is a coporatist puppet who only cares for the worst of the wealthy, those who would drive the middle class into poverty while they gorge at the corporate welfare trough. His legacy will be that of a disgrace to the office of Speaker and to the nation. He has the gall to whine about his false misfortune at the hands of the far right kooks in the House and the howlers on FAUX News. The sooner he retires and is gone the better for the nation. Shame on those who elected him to the House, they have also helped harm the nation.
13
Welcome back, Maureen. I, for one, have missed you enormously and have looked, tirelessly on Wednesdays and Sundays, for your column. Today it paid off. Thanks!
Leo Coughlin
Leo Coughlin
9
So glad you're back. Your very precise analysis about Boehner and the situation in this Congress really nailed it! Thanks so much.
5
Boehner and McConnell want to take credit for the economy? Obama should just veto all their fake-tan, elitist bills and watch in two years as the economy continues to roar and Republicans have absolutely nothing to say -- because they will have contributed exactly nothing to the country's development.
86
Maureen, you're totally glib and I love every bit of it!
2
For John Boehner to be lumped into the same company with Dean Martin, all I can say is, "Ain't that a kick in the head?"
5
Welcome back Ms. Dowd. Missed you!
1
At least Mr Squeaker need not worry walking a mile for his Camel to avoid gaining weight whilst absorbing Florida rays and imbibing some Deep Red whine: "lightweight" is in his DNA (Don't kNow Anything).
3
Justice will prevail. We are not paralyzed. The age of Aquarius is opon
us Don't let the public discourse refrain you. Truth shall win.
us Don't let the public discourse refrain you. Truth shall win.
It's good to have Maureen back!
2
"My Way," assuming that's what your last line alludes to, is Frank. Deano sang:
Everybody loves somebody sometime
Everybody falls in love somehow
Something in your kiss just told me
That sometime is now
Everybody finds somebody someplace
There's no telling where love may appear
Something in my heart keeps saying
My someplace is here
If I had it in my power
I'd arrange for every girl to have your charms
Then every minute, every hour
Everybody would find what I found in your arms
Everybody loves somebody sometime
And though my dreams were overdue
Your love made it all worth waiting
For someone like you
If I had it in my power
I'd arrange for every girl to have your charms
Then every minute, every hour
Everybody would find what I found in your arms
Everybody loves somebody sometime
And though my dreams were overdue
Your love made it all worth waiting
For someone like you
But somehow I doubt this is what Boehner sang to you, not matter how much Merlot.
Everybody loves somebody sometime
Everybody falls in love somehow
Something in your kiss just told me
That sometime is now
Everybody finds somebody someplace
There's no telling where love may appear
Something in my heart keeps saying
My someplace is here
If I had it in my power
I'd arrange for every girl to have your charms
Then every minute, every hour
Everybody would find what I found in your arms
Everybody loves somebody sometime
And though my dreams were overdue
Your love made it all worth waiting
For someone like you
If I had it in my power
I'd arrange for every girl to have your charms
Then every minute, every hour
Everybody would find what I found in your arms
Everybody loves somebody sometime
And though my dreams were overdue
Your love made it all worth waiting
For someone like you
But somehow I doubt this is what Boehner sang to you, not matter how much Merlot.
4
Boehner may look like an idiot to some of us, but he's a genius at fundraising for the Republicans. Read this from the NY Post: "Boehner (R-Ohio) plans to announce Wednesday that he raised nearly $7 million in the third quarter of the year ending Sept. 30, according to data shared first with The Washington Post. That brings Boehner's total campaign fundraising to more than $98 million over the course of the current two-year campaign cycle, exceeding the $97 million he raised during the entire 2012 cycle and nearly doubling what he raised ahead of the 2010 midterm elections.
1
I washed dishes and delivered pizzas to help pay for college. But that was 40 years ago when my college cost $4,000 a year. Now my alma mater costs $50,000 a year -- but pizza delivery boys and dishwashers don't make much more than they did in the 1970s. THAT is what Boehner and his cohorts fail to understand. Costs have gone up but wages haven't. Boehner could not put himself through college today working as a janitor.
21
Welcome back, Maureen, you and your magic touch. Pristine prose puctuated by snapshot images and crackling snorts pounded out by a scintilating, long-lost heroine wordsmithing a scathing column about a self-pitying, lost leader crying over his lost cause, oblivious to the long-suffering people of this lost nation.
Stay on the job. We need you, your vision, and your worlds.
Stay on the job. We need you, your vision, and your worlds.
2
Welcome back Maureen
Instead of lambasting the OTM, you should direct your sharp elbows toward Nancy Pelosi. In England,Canada or even India,when the head of a political party get trashed in national elections, he/she immediately step down voluntarily from the leadership post. And either become a backbencher or just retired. Pelosi led Dems to not once, but three consecutive resounding defeats. Yet,she is holding firm on her leader role. She aint gracious or savoy to realize her time is up. Actually, it's past due.
This lifelong lib/dem voter just can't believe not a single Dem has the nerve to challenge or led a coup to oust her.
Maybe you could Maureen!
PS: OTM stand for: Orange Tan Man
Instead of lambasting the OTM, you should direct your sharp elbows toward Nancy Pelosi. In England,Canada or even India,when the head of a political party get trashed in national elections, he/she immediately step down voluntarily from the leadership post. And either become a backbencher or just retired. Pelosi led Dems to not once, but three consecutive resounding defeats. Yet,she is holding firm on her leader role. She aint gracious or savoy to realize her time is up. Actually, it's past due.
This lifelong lib/dem voter just can't believe not a single Dem has the nerve to challenge or led a coup to oust her.
Maybe you could Maureen!
PS: OTM stand for: Orange Tan Man
1
MD is not the Queen of Snark, as she's often misidentified, she 's the reigning Queen of Satire.
1
Republicans like to think Obama has checked out then he beats them at their own game. Obama is governing. Boehner and the republicans are just posturing. You should have at least done your readers the service of pointing that out.
79
Ms. Dowd. Welcome back. I missed you! Excellent column.
1
While I frequently disagree with your views, Ms.Dowd, I'm glad you're back. And today's piece is pitch perfect. The only quibble I have is that the real Deano had great comic timing and was a class act.
2
Another musing that is to be imagined, and probably soon to be real; President Obama’s saying to Valerie bring me those new ‘veto’ pens. I think GOP’s triumph has made likely passage of bills will have more Dem’s flavor because of that set of pens. This new GOP Senate is really a win-win over previous necessity of Sen McConnell determining which Bills were voted on. The irony now he is in position to do just that, however; he is trumped by dem filibuster and the man holding those darn pens. And because turnabout is fair play, with only two years left in Obama’s term; I am sure he is going to help McConnell get back his old Senate number two spot and Speaker Boehner will be back to talking to himself.
1
Glad you're back Maureen. Welcome to the 2015 Sewer.
And how about that cringe-inducing kiss he gave to Nancy Pelosi? Eeew! One of those images we'll never be able to unsee.
There's just something about the color orange that has come to embody Republican dysfunction and boorishness. Which seems to explain why Chris Christie's loud sweater turned him into such a repulsive huggy bear.
In Speaker Boehner's case, given the extent of his political cowardice and obstructionism as the epitome of congressional ineptitude, it's safe to say that orange is the new yellow.
"I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin," he said, showing once again that nothing suits John Boehner so well as shamelessness. Dean Martin, no doubt, would consider Ms. Dowd's comparison an insult.
There's just something about the color orange that has come to embody Republican dysfunction and boorishness. Which seems to explain why Chris Christie's loud sweater turned him into such a repulsive huggy bear.
In Speaker Boehner's case, given the extent of his political cowardice and obstructionism as the epitome of congressional ineptitude, it's safe to say that orange is the new yellow.
"I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin," he said, showing once again that nothing suits John Boehner so well as shamelessness. Dean Martin, no doubt, would consider Ms. Dowd's comparison an insult.
5
Give or take a couple hundred years ago our Founding Fodders began a great experiment in democratic government. From this Dowd sniffling Speaker of the House chronicle we can conclude the Founders experiment in democracy has failed.
Boehner, 3rd in line for our presidency is not by any stretch a leader. We are leaderless; the world is leaderless and evil blooms its poison on every continent.
What distinguishes our country, the youngest country with the oldest standing government—though most of us cannot stand the government—is Freedom of Speech.
When was the last time you heard any candidate for federal office deliver an unmitigated unmoderated stand-alone extemporaneous live televised speech on behalf of their candidacy?
Speech without a moderator asking the questions and allowing 120 seconds for an answer?
You the candidate in charge of what you are going to say and how long it will take you to say it?
When was the first time? Not in your lifetime, grasshopper. Because our Freedom of political speech has been zeroed out, so Free Speech is not in the mix. Instead we are followers of a second rater — Boehner, etc.
The U.S. of A. under Brack and Speak-cur Boehner a 2nd rate Boehner nation.
http://newworldhorsdoeuvres.com
Boehner, 3rd in line for our presidency is not by any stretch a leader. We are leaderless; the world is leaderless and evil blooms its poison on every continent.
What distinguishes our country, the youngest country with the oldest standing government—though most of us cannot stand the government—is Freedom of Speech.
When was the last time you heard any candidate for federal office deliver an unmitigated unmoderated stand-alone extemporaneous live televised speech on behalf of their candidacy?
Speech without a moderator asking the questions and allowing 120 seconds for an answer?
You the candidate in charge of what you are going to say and how long it will take you to say it?
When was the first time? Not in your lifetime, grasshopper. Because our Freedom of political speech has been zeroed out, so Free Speech is not in the mix. Instead we are followers of a second rater — Boehner, etc.
The U.S. of A. under Brack and Speak-cur Boehner a 2nd rate Boehner nation.
http://newworldhorsdoeuvres.com
I think Maureen has been away too long. Or maybe I'm just not getting her humor after a grueling armchair quarterbacking session with my NE Patriots.
But this column actually rang a little too true. I mean, I could actually picture every single line Boehner says, and then some.
At the end of the 113th Congress, we read that J. Boehner would go down in history as the worst speaker ever. Maybe not: now that he has his majority, he might just go down as the very worst speaker ever in this 114th Congress. At least, for the past few years he earned his title through inaction. Now, he's about to win it for actions--many of which have been announced, making this 114th group 100% more effective than the entire 113th.
Some would call that progress. I don't.
But this column actually rang a little too true. I mean, I could actually picture every single line Boehner says, and then some.
At the end of the 113th Congress, we read that J. Boehner would go down in history as the worst speaker ever. Maybe not: now that he has his majority, he might just go down as the very worst speaker ever in this 114th Congress. At least, for the past few years he earned his title through inaction. Now, he's about to win it for actions--many of which have been announced, making this 114th group 100% more effective than the entire 113th.
Some would call that progress. I don't.
58
Wow... He called Sean Hannity a knuckle-dragger! I think I'm beginning to have some respect for Boehner after all.
14
All of the column came from MS Dowd's satirical, creative mind. I wouldn't be trumpeting to the world in your comment that John Boehner literally called Hannity a "knuckledragger" on the record to a member of the Press. He may have said it to someone else and that might or might not be common knowledge.
2
No, it's Dowd who deserves your respect. She (putting words in the mouth of John Boehner), called Hannity a knuckle-dragger. This is satire, Brent. It pokes fun, but it ain't necessarily so.
3
Welcome back. For awhile there, I was afraid you were ill, or writing a book. I went to two supposed Ivy League universities, but the thing I like about the Speaker ... he is a blue collar kid from Cincinnati who grew up to be even- tempered and non-radical. He should drop the Camels and move on from Merlot, right?
OH GREAT HONK!! AND THIS is the LEADER of our HOUSE of Reps? GREAT HONK!!! What a disaster!
14
What does "great honk" mean? Is it the new hipster catch phrase?
1
Boehner is the worst do nothing speaker without back bone in the history of America.
41
welcome back maureen, you were sorely missed. Great piece on Boehener.
Pls do Mitch next, he of the opinion that 3rd qtr GDP growth was due to public expectation he wd be senate leader. Grand plan for the USA, XL pipe to move Canadian all through US to world markets.
Pls do Mitch next, he of the opinion that 3rd qtr GDP growth was due to public expectation he wd be senate leader. Grand plan for the USA, XL pipe to move Canadian all through US to world markets.
32
Come on everybody! Wake up! This is a real interview! Nobody can make this stuff up!
8
I knew Dean Martin, Ms. Dowd, and Boehner ain't no Dean Martin. Actually I think Boehner has more in common with Mr. Haney of Green Acres fame.
41
While Mr. Boehner may have swilled merlot on Marco Island, a far more fabulous lifestyle was being enjoyed in Hawaii, by a golf-obsessed President - who offers a much larger target for wit and irony than Mr. Boehner.
In the interests of fairness, is that coming in next week's column?
In the interests of fairness, is that coming in next week's column?
9
At least Obama works the rest of the year!
7
Your request is probably being answered soon. Hopefully with a score card comparing the number of days taken off by the bush-clearing previous occupant of the White House. That would be a fair comparison.
3
Maureen Dowd and Gail Collins in the same weekend. Life is good again
50
Scary that this man Boehner is third in line for succession to the presidency. Scary that he leads the House of Representatives filled with people who cannot be led. Scary that Boehner and his band of brothers consider opposing President Obama and obstructing their strategies for governing. Scary that pessimism is the watchword of today's Republican Party. Scary that Republicans attacks on Social Security and Medicare have gotten so sneaky. Scary that orange is the new black.
71
Thank God Maureen is back. George, Santa Fe.
According to Peter's Principle (are you old enough to recall that?) "in a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his/her level of incompetence".
John Boehner has risen to the top of his game and held on to his job in the face of stiff competition. He too has risen to his level of incompetence.
John Boehner has risen to the top of his game and held on to his job in the face of stiff competition. He too has risen to his level of incompetence.
29
He did that a long time ago, right after 2010.
2
Stiff competition?? Surely you jest.
2
I hope 2015 is a year when Ms. Dowd goes after the real political cretins like Boehner and McConnell and their dangerous tribe. But this would mean weaning herself away from her predilection for attacking President Obama for personality disorders and other imagined offenses.
106
So how many people of color live on Marco Island? If I am correct Boehner has been anti Obama since Obama was elected. Now he thinks he can do what he wants, similar to any common dictator anywhere in the world. And I wonder what he would have done if he had been offered a helping hand when he was in college. He had to work as a janitor, ain't that tough, you'd think he would have had his consciousness raised and be a champion of those in low paying jobs but he seems to disrespect these folks. Shame on him and his phony attitude of being for the common man. And what is the median price of a house on Marco Island? Forget free education he says, I guess educating people is a threat to him. And smoking, a real example to set for the young ones.
62
Nice to have you back, Maureen. We missed your rapier wit.
3
What's the point? That Boehner shares Dowd's contempt for Obama?
Tell us something we don't know.
Tell us something we don't know.
11
Looks like its 2016 now with Maureen on the prowl.
Pettiness is the clarion call of The People's House. Will never understand the downward spiral of those who hold the position of Speaker. haven't seen a true Speaker since Tip!
30
QED: It has become impossible to satirise our government. The Dowd spin on the Speaker seems no more improbable than recent ravings of the Senate majority leader.
28
I fear you are very correct. Satire is the last refuge of the oppressed.
1
Welcome back, Ms. Dowd. Very good to see you back again and looking forward to your fine columns.
2
Finally, something to smile about in the cold days of January. Welcome back Mo!
5
Maureen is wonderful with her political incorrectness as wit and irony take charge, but I'm afraid her targets, Boehner and McConnell, won't understand the spirit in which it is intended nor the foresight to realize this is just a warm- up of things to come. Too bad the U.S. won't tolerate french-like caricatures of our puffed-up politicians, so they deign come down to earth, and make up lost time. Too bad that swilling merlot won't sweeten the bitter pill republicans must swallow, now that reality is 'in their face'.
12
"Rat-finks"? Did Ms Dowd take a breather only to return in 1973? Good work, though.
Come to think of it, I haven't seen Mr. Boehner cry in public. With such an array of legislators who cannot be depended upon to appreciate their committee assignments it would seem there are reasons to cry. Alas, if he won't cry perhaps we should.
All we get in legislation from the "new" House is a vote to approve a pipeline to move oil so thick it requires heating or additives to flow through a pipe. Nothing to raise the minimum wage or encourage - heaven forbid - renewable energy or infrastructure development or reduction in education interest charges or funding for food stamps or .... We need to cry for the fialure of Congress to actively support the many needs of our country. We need to cry for the lack of vision and leadership Congress provides.
All we get in legislation from the "new" House is a vote to approve a pipeline to move oil so thick it requires heating or additives to flow through a pipe. Nothing to raise the minimum wage or encourage - heaven forbid - renewable energy or infrastructure development or reduction in education interest charges or funding for food stamps or .... We need to cry for the fialure of Congress to actively support the many needs of our country. We need to cry for the lack of vision and leadership Congress provides.
96
I take it that publication of this column was not preceded by a promise to make its subject look good.
3
I teared up this week too when Mr Boehner 's team passed House rules that put the Disabled in harm's way. The GOP took the funds transfer flexibility out of the Social Security Trust fund just when the Disabled fund is reaching a funding shortfall increasing the potential for a severe cut in disabled benefits. There was no warning that Boehner's team was about to change the rules for the wheelchair folks. More than dirty pool..evil.
58
Thanks for making another Sunday morning for me, Maureen. You are vicious and hilarious. The truth is in there somewhere, too.
4
I think he needs a "Ratpack", Mo, just like Deano did....
The big problem is no one in Washngton knows how to sing like Frank did, let alone harmonize with someone else. Nobody can get on the dance floor and move like Sammy Davis, Jr. did, because they can't let anyone else lead.
But, in Nancy Pelosi, they do have the Shirley Maclaine Housemother to help them pick up the empty bottles of hope and occasionally sober up.
All the while, the non-philandering kid with the big ears, playing JFK ,is off sharpening up his dulled golf game in Hawaii, at a cost to the American Taxpayer of....oh well, whats the use?
They are all doing it "their way." I liked Frank's version better.
The big problem is no one in Washngton knows how to sing like Frank did, let alone harmonize with someone else. Nobody can get on the dance floor and move like Sammy Davis, Jr. did, because they can't let anyone else lead.
But, in Nancy Pelosi, they do have the Shirley Maclaine Housemother to help them pick up the empty bottles of hope and occasionally sober up.
All the while, the non-philandering kid with the big ears, playing JFK ,is off sharpening up his dulled golf game in Hawaii, at a cost to the American Taxpayer of....oh well, whats the use?
They are all doing it "their way." I liked Frank's version better.
3
Ms. Dowd, just as your loyal readership was thinking of giving you your walking papers for taking off on a well-deserved holiday, you showed up in time for us to wish you a Happy New Year.
Let's see what you have chosen to bring to the table here. The strange man who was sitting behind President Obama for months looking as if he was about to burst into tears? I used to wonder about him and he reminded me of a loose cannon. This is when you don't want to be right. Most likely he will go down in history as the man who clung to the President for dear Life, while wishing him to Hades, and we pay attention to such political characters, much to our detriment at times.
In summary, others will have a far better contribution to add to your fine column here, and I shall just conclude by saying there is nothing that one can do with a man like that. He should be dismissed and ignored, while we carry on with our daily business, and just keep us in the loop from time to time, as to his latest pranks, which tend to backfire, unless we are blind as bats and want to behave like dolts.
Thank you for a fine portrait of a politician that one might wish to place in one's attic.
Let's see what you have chosen to bring to the table here. The strange man who was sitting behind President Obama for months looking as if he was about to burst into tears? I used to wonder about him and he reminded me of a loose cannon. This is when you don't want to be right. Most likely he will go down in history as the man who clung to the President for dear Life, while wishing him to Hades, and we pay attention to such political characters, much to our detriment at times.
In summary, others will have a far better contribution to add to your fine column here, and I shall just conclude by saying there is nothing that one can do with a man like that. He should be dismissed and ignored, while we carry on with our daily business, and just keep us in the loop from time to time, as to his latest pranks, which tend to backfire, unless we are blind as bats and want to behave like dolts.
Thank you for a fine portrait of a politician that one might wish to place in one's attic.
12
Thanks for the pot shots, Ms. D. But maybe any op-ed should be framed with the notice that we are coping with a low point in our congressional history.
Although it may be fun to make fun, our troubled republic sorely needs a more mature, less moneyed, congress and we need it now.
Although it may be fun to make fun, our troubled republic sorely needs a more mature, less moneyed, congress and we need it now.
67
You are Establishment if all you accomplish is keeping yourself established.
1
Welcome back! I've missed you, too. Too bad about Boehner (and Mitch McConnell). One day they'll both be just sad history. Well, actually they already are -- maybe one day we won't have to hear so much about them.
10
Welcome back, Maureen! You have been sorely missed by your readers and those who need/want the publicity, even when it's biting.
1
So he likes the tanning booth or whatever. He is human and he is out front, the type you will miss when he's gone. I can't say the same for Barack Obama.
2
There is no need for you to say anything about the President then.
4
As a professor of English at Miami University (Ohio), I lived in the Eighth Congressional District--Rep Boehner's district. In 1999-2000, I was a candidate for Congress against him. Of course I did not win--the numbers, like the stars, are not aligned properly there. But I gave it my best shot: I attended all the candidate events, attended the summer fairs and parades, put up signs, bought a few billboards, even had a radio and t.v. spot (shown at hours when no one would see/hear them!). The Speaker never attended and did not "speak." I mean, really, what could he say about his votes? How could he really defend his policies? I used to ask: "Name three things that are better because of Mr. Boehner." There were and are no answers. But he always knew where the money is. Another mistake in the democracy of these United States that instills fear for our future.
103
What district does Boehner represent? Is it in Florida?
8
What Boehner can't understand is that no one today could afford college on a "janitor" salary since the cost of higher education has risen exorbitantly since he graduated. The amount of debt that students and parents accumulate is unsustainable leaving many in the middle class to forfeit their hope of a degree. In the long run, this will hurt us as a society and nation.
29
How I have missed your column. This one didn't disappoint. I keep a mental rating score of my favorites. This one is an 8. My favorite being the one on Judy Miller/Scooter Libby. That was a 10. So glad you're back.
4
Nice try but there is nothing amusing about Boehner running the House or McConnell running the Senate. I find them both visually depressing and they will dominate the media for at least the next couple of years. I suppose I will have to cut down on the news and hope for the best. It's time for the Democrats to show a little fight.
113
You may be surprised at how your daily outlook will improve once you cut down on the news. Especially the "stuff" on TV.
2
Dear Ms. Dowd,
C'mon, lay off the Speaker of the House! At the minimum, he's one GOP/TPer that ISN'T kinda/maybe/for sure/don't know running for president!
So he slugs back Merlot, changes skin color more often than a chameleon and doesn't like Mr. Obama; give the guy a break-he just does what the people pulling his strings tell him to do (This is how I envision his phone calls, unlike yours: Mr. Boehner speaking into mouth piece, "Yes Sir, Mr. Koch! Right away, sir!").
All in all, I'm proud that you didn't call the rest of the Republicans the "Rat Pack", the moniker given Dean, Frank and the rest of the booze guzzling, skirt chasing, Vegas crowd (Mitch McConnell really looks more like an owl).
At any rate, keep an eye on the multi-color "Speaker of the House" for us; I look forward to the "antics" of this bunch as they try to fight all the bad news;
a. The economy is growing
b. The debt is shrinking
c. Inflation, what's that?
d. ACA might actually be working
e. Jobs, though not high paying, are becoming more available.
All of this even with fiscal cliffs, government shutdowns and sequesters as a means of running the country.
I'm sure the GOP/TP will do it's level best to cure all of these problems especially with the "36% Mandate" they were given in this last election.
C'mon, lay off the Speaker of the House! At the minimum, he's one GOP/TPer that ISN'T kinda/maybe/for sure/don't know running for president!
So he slugs back Merlot, changes skin color more often than a chameleon and doesn't like Mr. Obama; give the guy a break-he just does what the people pulling his strings tell him to do (This is how I envision his phone calls, unlike yours: Mr. Boehner speaking into mouth piece, "Yes Sir, Mr. Koch! Right away, sir!").
All in all, I'm proud that you didn't call the rest of the Republicans the "Rat Pack", the moniker given Dean, Frank and the rest of the booze guzzling, skirt chasing, Vegas crowd (Mitch McConnell really looks more like an owl).
At any rate, keep an eye on the multi-color "Speaker of the House" for us; I look forward to the "antics" of this bunch as they try to fight all the bad news;
a. The economy is growing
b. The debt is shrinking
c. Inflation, what's that?
d. ACA might actually be working
e. Jobs, though not high paying, are becoming more available.
All of this even with fiscal cliffs, government shutdowns and sequesters as a means of running the country.
I'm sure the GOP/TP will do it's level best to cure all of these problems especially with the "36% Mandate" they were given in this last election.
24
b.? I don't think so. Maybe deficit not debt,
Pretty funny. But hard to figure who and what the 'Speaker' really is.
2
Boehner looks like Sam Rayburn compared to chuckleheads like Gohmert and Yoho.
2
Cute snark but the Boehner-McConnell economic recovery is already underway. It's Morning in America again.
1
Snark? Surely you jest. Your comment has to be the epitome of snark when you suggest --- even in jest --- that the economic recovery (such as it is, too little, too late) has anything to do with anyone in the Republican party whatsoever.
17
The only part Boehner and McConnell can take credit for in a recovery is being the brakes of the vehicle.
15
Give Boehner credit! He has steadied the ship as it sails toward 2016 and another Bush scion. Sadly he must have a death wish embedded deep inside: smoking Camels and laying in the tanning cooker. Tea Party is but a gnat swirling around a lightbulb, not a chance. Rubio, Paul and Cruz will fall away like the lightweights they are and Jeb will stand firm. Poor Romney is considering another whuppin' what part of not electable does he not get?
Hey, and welcome back Ms. Dowd!
Hey, and welcome back Ms. Dowd!
3
I'm glad you're at least pointing your poison pen at those who deserve it.
16
There is going to be little to nothing substantive until the Representatives Absurdities-Inanities (R-USA) openly applaud Senator Elizabeth Warren's objection about that bizarrely named compromise's provision that Wall Street luvs to the nation's potential for financial ruin.
The GOP's populist faction surely doesn't like that "The Establishment" is crying (if not laughing) all the way to their too big to fail banks/casino parlors.
Doesn't the very angry GOP faction realize their potential in making coalition on at least that outrage with enough angry Democrats?
Wouldn't Speaker Boehner be befuddled if/when his party's extremists soon publically announce they agree on that issue with Senator Warren and enough Democrats.
And somehow the Congress sends a pertinent bill to President Obama, whom had realized he must play ball with the GOP even to get a compromise budget passed, and now has to think about discarding the highly symbolic issue.
If they want to embarrass Obama such would be the ironic & legitimate way instead of their poundings/dogma about tiresome Benghazi & Solyndra,
The GOP's populist faction surely doesn't like that "The Establishment" is crying (if not laughing) all the way to their too big to fail banks/casino parlors.
Doesn't the very angry GOP faction realize their potential in making coalition on at least that outrage with enough angry Democrats?
Wouldn't Speaker Boehner be befuddled if/when his party's extremists soon publically announce they agree on that issue with Senator Warren and enough Democrats.
And somehow the Congress sends a pertinent bill to President Obama, whom had realized he must play ball with the GOP even to get a compromise budget passed, and now has to think about discarding the highly symbolic issue.
If they want to embarrass Obama such would be the ironic & legitimate way instead of their poundings/dogma about tiresome Benghazi & Solyndra,
Welcome back, Ms. Dowd, we've missed you. Well, except for that nicely written piece you wrote about the passing of lovely Lauren Bacall, which was appropriate and tasteful.
But in your column today, it sounded like The Orange One wrote most of the clever dialogue without any help from you. Still, we enjoyed the read and hope for more of the same as this new year unfolds. If you choose to write about McConnell, give him both barrels. No one deserves being panned more!
But in your column today, it sounded like The Orange One wrote most of the clever dialogue without any help from you. Still, we enjoyed the read and hope for more of the same as this new year unfolds. If you choose to write about McConnell, give him both barrels. No one deserves being panned more!
6
So Boehner has digs on Marco Island. Pretty snooty neighborhood for a lowly-paid gov't employee. How do you suppose he financed that deal?
23
bravo Maureen. many countries where kids & adults speak more than 1 or 2 languages have some free education. it's what makes for civilization.
Well welcome back! It was pretty grim here without you. How can grown people be serious about this stuff?
3
I've wondered what's happened to Maureen Dowd and now she's back, just in time for the 2016 Presidential campaign to begin.
Will this mean that Hillary will make her announcement this week?
Will this mean that Hillary will make her announcement this week?
Welcome back Ms Dowd, a classic column!
One thing though. In spite of all the palace intrigues, one has to wonder where Speaker Boehner would be without President Obama.
p.s. Ultra Light Camel may be better than some Ultra Tar Canid brand, used by some of Mr Boehner's unwilling followers. It has the tendency to flatten the skull and thus constraining brain function. Its condition is worse than any condition caused by excessive indulgence in the sun, regular cigarette or booze
One thing though. In spite of all the palace intrigues, one has to wonder where Speaker Boehner would be without President Obama.
p.s. Ultra Light Camel may be better than some Ultra Tar Canid brand, used by some of Mr Boehner's unwilling followers. It has the tendency to flatten the skull and thus constraining brain function. Its condition is worse than any condition caused by excessive indulgence in the sun, regular cigarette or booze
3
Welcome back, Maureen! I've missed you! And this piece is terrific. I don't much care for John Boehner…took me forever to figure out how to say his name…never mind some of the pronunciations I came up with…use your imagination. We have a muddled group in the house and senate, with mostly status quo guys there to take care of their 1% by both parties. Then we have the progressives, particularly Sanders who wants to know what is in the TTP and why is it secret from the senate. And then there is Warren who is cutting a rug over the banking rules. There is the congressional black caucus who actually stand for something in my book. But otherwise, who is there to actually buck Boehner and his cohorts? This country has been overcome with thieves and demagogues.
80
If Boehner is the anti-establishment person of color (albeit orange) of the Republican party, I can only prophelate on the rest of the l'éléphant majority. In the glossy photo shop culture of the millenia, image is everything. The son of a barkeeper, emoter extraordinaire, Floridian golf culture specialist, populist of good ol' boy culture, what's not to like about this leader of the party?
His personality reminds me of the profile of an adult child of alcoholics (ACA.) The enabler of others bad habits, schmoozer in order to cover for the inadequacies of the GOP party, reactor rather than actor, codependent mediator between the responsible parent (President Obama) and unruly children (Tea Party crazies,) and a master of passive-aggressive manipulation. He makes a perfect character for an Oliver Stone, Federico Fellini, David Lynch, Spike Lee or David O. Russell's American Hustle movie. The anti-establishment protagonist who rails against the impervious mutiny of the stuffy black suit crowd. Expect an academy award for best actor of the year.
His personality reminds me of the profile of an adult child of alcoholics (ACA.) The enabler of others bad habits, schmoozer in order to cover for the inadequacies of the GOP party, reactor rather than actor, codependent mediator between the responsible parent (President Obama) and unruly children (Tea Party crazies,) and a master of passive-aggressive manipulation. He makes a perfect character for an Oliver Stone, Federico Fellini, David Lynch, Spike Lee or David O. Russell's American Hustle movie. The anti-establishment protagonist who rails against the impervious mutiny of the stuffy black suit crowd. Expect an academy award for best actor of the year.
91
Am I the only person who noticed that Speaker Bohener's radioactive looking skin color and the color of the sweater that Governor Christie wore last week while kissing Jerry Jones' tuchis in the owner's box at whatever the stadium that the Dallas Cowboys in play are eerily similar? Maybe the GOP is going to restore the House of Orange on these shores...
3
Thomas Jefferson compared the House and Senate to tipping your tea into your saucer before drinking it, as not to scorch your tongue. The behavior of sipping your tea from a saucer is out of fashion, the meaning is not lost. In other words this part of the legislative branch of our government is purposefully designed to be slow and act as a cooling system.
As for John Boehner, he is the son of a large family. They owned a bar. He grew up around all that mid western acceptable alcoholism. Child labor exploited by small businessman during that time. The high standing for such hard working children in the community and family. These guys really do measure themselves on their golf tans.
Although, you might be able to drive a school bus through the hole that leaves emotionally. Yet, our political leaders don't have to pass mental health exams to hold their jobs. Half of being employable is holding your crazy down to a dull roar so you can do the job. He does come across as pretty heartless. The Tea Party wants more than just heartless these days.
Boehner has personally refused to pass extended unemployment benefits since December of 2013. The economy is growing. There is some evidence that the long term unemployed are "not" re-entering the workforce. They retired early, have taken under the table jobs, live with relatives, depend on spouses incomes etc.. They want someone meaner than Boehner?
As for John Boehner, he is the son of a large family. They owned a bar. He grew up around all that mid western acceptable alcoholism. Child labor exploited by small businessman during that time. The high standing for such hard working children in the community and family. These guys really do measure themselves on their golf tans.
Although, you might be able to drive a school bus through the hole that leaves emotionally. Yet, our political leaders don't have to pass mental health exams to hold their jobs. Half of being employable is holding your crazy down to a dull roar so you can do the job. He does come across as pretty heartless. The Tea Party wants more than just heartless these days.
Boehner has personally refused to pass extended unemployment benefits since December of 2013. The economy is growing. There is some evidence that the long term unemployed are "not" re-entering the workforce. They retired early, have taken under the table jobs, live with relatives, depend on spouses incomes etc.. They want someone meaner than Boehner?
54
I believe the tea analogy was Washington to Jefferson, regarding the Senate. Milk in tea cools it, as the Senate would cool the legislation coming out of the House.
1
This is not about milk. The underlying point is that the "Congress" both the House and the Senate are designed to be slow moving. Thank god indeed. The fashion was pouring the tea into the saucer to cool it and drinking after. Perhaps there is more than one reference which would be logical.
Ms. Dowd: you were sorely missed these past two months.
61
Boehner is so 2010! I expected Maureen to wax poetic about multimillionaire Barbara Boxer's deciding that sitting in a minority just wouldn't be fun, since she loves so to talk up the celebrities!
Besides, Barbara will always make better photos than Red John.
Besides, Barbara will always make better photos than Red John.
5
Another home run by Dowd. Mr. Boehner loves his title but not the job. History won't treat him well, but before we get there, he and his Tea Party rulers will have damaged the Great Republic immeasurably.
151
Wow! Your flinty words go straight for the jugular. No stops or relief to the one who is in your line of fire. Welcome back! Missed you a lot while you were away. Were you taking one of those hard-earned vacation like President Obama? Please, stay posted.
11
"...even as his skin made the press uncomfortable..."
LOFL! So glad somebody still cares about congress, rat-finks & rat packs & all.
And so glad it's Maureen Dowd, who still has teeth (especially when they're chewing out miscreant hypocrites with her biting sense of humor).
LOFL! So glad somebody still cares about congress, rat-finks & rat packs & all.
And so glad it's Maureen Dowd, who still has teeth (especially when they're chewing out miscreant hypocrites with her biting sense of humor).
24
He refills his glass of red wine as his blue eyes fill with tears.
“It’s still just me, guys,” he sobs, “doing it my way.”
Oh Mo,..
But, darling, what can I do?
For you don't love me
And I'll always be crying over you
Crying over you...
Tears...Boehner...what a cry baby.
Read more: Roy Orbison - Crying Lyrics | MetroLyrics
“It’s still just me, guys,” he sobs, “doing it my way.”
Oh Mo,..
But, darling, what can I do?
For you don't love me
And I'll always be crying over you
Crying over you...
Tears...Boehner...what a cry baby.
Read more: Roy Orbison - Crying Lyrics | MetroLyrics
6
A cry baby who throws tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants and places the Country at risk, if we don't give him enough treats. A dangerous man, susceptible to compliments, who appears to be spoiled beyond repair, and we should expect to be in for a bumpy ride until he decides that it is time to join his country club, sitting in a comfortable armchair, surrounded by his best admiring pals.
5
Meanwhile in the Senate, Mitch McConnell is singing Glenn Miller economics policy songs. And apparently, so he says, it worked!
Wishing will make it so
Just keep on wishing and care will go
Dreamers tell us dreams come true
It's no mistake
And wishes are the dreams we dream
When we're awake
The curtain of night will part
If you are certain within your heart
So if you wish long enough, wish strong enough
You will come to know
Wishing will make it so
Wishing will make it so
Just keep on wishing and care will go
Dreamers tell us dreams come true
It's no mistake
And wishes are the dreams we dream
When we're awake
The curtain of night will part
If you are certain within your heart
So if you wish long enough, wish strong enough
You will come to know
Wishing will make it so
7
Nice to see you back Maureen..
11
This is not on topicßßI cannot respond to anything that includes the names of Goober Gohmert and Ted Yahoo. But I do want to welcome Maureen back! You were missed.
12
Maureen gets her Christmas wish, a whole new crop of clone daddies to parody. a break for Obama and a return to comic form. about one of the only good things to come out of the congressional reshuffling. the sad part, when you have a party already claiming victory for an economic recovery they had absolutely nothing to do with, and a playbook that targets women's right to choose, putting a corrosive pipeline through giant aquifer lands, cutting precious dollars from social security recipients, and dismantling a health care system finally serving more americans, the next two years could be pretty bleak. it'll take gallows humor to get through.
68
Welcome back, Maureen.
13
She's baaaack. But, I don't hear the scandalous gay-bashing jokes from Boehner that one heard from Deano until his dying day, quite despite the comparative swarthiness. What's more, he was hardly toppled from his speakership by a "nobody named Ted Yoho" -- his re-election as speaker was never in question. Indeed, that's quite a bit more than Barack Obama can say about HIS re-election.
Any man who spells his name Boehner and pronounces it to rhyme with (Gloria) Gaynor is a pretty easy target. Anyone who smokes those floor-sweepings and calls them "Camels" is doubly an easy hit. And anyone who wipes out a Duane Reade of its entire inventory of Coppertone is trebly an easy hit.
Mo wastes herself. Barry now has about two years left to find a legacy, and for all his desperation can't seem to find one with both hands and (almost) the entire Times commenting community as in love with him as Chris Christie seems to be with the Cowboys ... and red sweaters. She needs to start publishing those love-needles again, so replete with biting contempt, so insistent that he get off his duff and DO something effective.
Another round at Augusta doesn't cut it.
Any man who spells his name Boehner and pronounces it to rhyme with (Gloria) Gaynor is a pretty easy target. Anyone who smokes those floor-sweepings and calls them "Camels" is doubly an easy hit. And anyone who wipes out a Duane Reade of its entire inventory of Coppertone is trebly an easy hit.
Mo wastes herself. Barry now has about two years left to find a legacy, and for all his desperation can't seem to find one with both hands and (almost) the entire Times commenting community as in love with him as Chris Christie seems to be with the Cowboys ... and red sweaters. She needs to start publishing those love-needles again, so replete with biting contempt, so insistent that he get off his duff and DO something effective.
Another round at Augusta doesn't cut it.
6
"Another round at Augusta doesn't cut it."
Oh, that darn golf playing president, whose love for golf is so uppety, daring to follow in the foot steps of Eisenhower and Clinton, both passionate golfers during their presidencies. A hole at Army Navy Club in Arlington, VA is even named after Eisenhower.
And, by the way, how can he play 'another' round at Augusta National, when he has not even played a first one there?
Oh, that darn golf playing president, whose love for golf is so uppety, daring to follow in the foot steps of Eisenhower and Clinton, both passionate golfers during their presidencies. A hole at Army Navy Club in Arlington, VA is even named after Eisenhower.
And, by the way, how can he play 'another' round at Augusta National, when he has not even played a first one there?
15
No legacy? Where have you been the last six years? The speaker is a master obstacle maximiser up to his same old games of do nothing and blame everyone else for it.
10
Republicans complain every time the president DOES something. And then, in the next breath, moan that that he needs to DO something.
Of course, the problem isn't that he's not doing anything. It's that he's doing things the GOP happens not to like--taking action on climate change, health-care reform, immigration reform, education, etc. He's using the power of his office to effect meaningful change. John Boehner, on the other hand, is incapable of changing the way his caucus operates. Witness how he knuckled under once again to its most conservative faction on immigration recently.
But he did manage to hang onto his job, that's true. So, from his perspective, it's all good.
Of course, the problem isn't that he's not doing anything. It's that he's doing things the GOP happens not to like--taking action on climate change, health-care reform, immigration reform, education, etc. He's using the power of his office to effect meaningful change. John Boehner, on the other hand, is incapable of changing the way his caucus operates. Witness how he knuckled under once again to its most conservative faction on immigration recently.
But he did manage to hang onto his job, that's true. So, from his perspective, it's all good.
5
Mo you're so funny. Boehner, not so funny. From what I've heard from him, he isn't capable of that kind of wit. Seeing Mitch McConnell try to be funny would be almost as bad as seeing him naked. But I digress. The President has tolerated way too much from these two. He should use every tool at his disposal to frustrate, hand-cuff, stymie and outsmart the two demogogues. If Barry uses the bully pulpit and the media for all they're worth, he can use his last two years getting his goals met for America's improvement and teaching these malcontents what they deserve. If only.
123
Oh God, I can't unsee the image you put in my head. Make it go away!!
2
He'd have to get the media out of the republican pocket first!
1
I'd like to add my thanks for Ms. Dowd's return . But I'm surprised that she didn't make some sort of acerbic comment on the picture that recently appeared on the front page of many newspapers. It showed His Orangeness giving outgoing Speaker Nancy Pelosi a kiss on the cheek that clearly repulsed her. I'm sure that he had consumed a Bad Ice Cube. AlI know is that if I'd tried such a stunt, I'b be summoned to the Human Resources department...Forthwith
3
Welcome back, Maureen. You have been missed.
5
What are YOU complaining about? I live in his district...almost (my knuckleheaded rep is Chabot!) GLAD you're back...missed you madly.
5
Welcome back, Mo.
5
I don't know where Ms. Dowd has been for the past two months, but I'm glad she is back.
6
What a loser Boehner is. You would think that he were speaking from a history of superlative legislative accomplishments. Instead third-rate stand-up! From the lowest producing Speaker in the history of the universe. So sad.
gemli's comments provide you with a more erudite assement.
gemli's comments provide you with a more erudite assement.
47
Maureen, you're back ... safe and sound, of course this column could have been written months before ... nevertheless I campaigned to find Maureen Dowd ... and it appears to have worked. Only almost kidding, of course, but you never know.
John Boehner is a glass half empty or half filled, or emptied and then refilled again and again.
John Boehner is a glass half empty or half filled, or emptied and then refilled again and again.
7
A Republican party that has Boehner as Speaker with challenges by the likes of Louie Gohmert, surely the most ignorant member of Congress--although not by much--and Mr. Yoho, has a better chance guesting on the Simpsons than governing the country.
31
I take it Speaker Boehner can't bring himself to visit any primary schools, lest the sight of those children, for whom the American Dream is out of reach, reduce him to tears. For a different tact, he could visit the adult students at community colleges, for whom the American Dream us out of reach, then see how his composure holds up. Let's see if through weeping, he recites Republican platitudes about how anyone can be successful if they just had the drive and reduced taxes.
62
Welcome back, Maureen.
You have outdone Obama; no way he could have disappeared for two months without a google or a trace...
You have outdone Obama; no way he could have disappeared for two months without a google or a trace...
7
Dowd's comparison of John Boehner to Dean Martin is an insult to Dean Martin. Dean was the coolest member of the Rat Pack. Boehner is the opposite of cool. Even the most rabidly conservative of the Tea Partiers think so.
37
I think that Dean Martin was much smarter and more savvy than John Boehner. A much better actor, too.
3
John Boehner, R-Planet Orange, was such a rebel that he voted for:
Both of Bush's unfunded, disastrous wars.
Both of Bush's unfunded tax gifts to the plutocracy.
Bush's unfunded trillion dollar gift to Big Pharma, Medicare Part D.
All 7 of Boy George's debt ceiling increases.
Had Boehner completed his military service during the Viet Nam War he would have had the GI Bill for college.
Alas, he lasted all of 8 weeks before being discharged for a weak back.
Both of Bush's unfunded, disastrous wars.
Both of Bush's unfunded tax gifts to the plutocracy.
Bush's unfunded trillion dollar gift to Big Pharma, Medicare Part D.
All 7 of Boy George's debt ceiling increases.
Had Boehner completed his military service during the Viet Nam War he would have had the GI Bill for college.
Alas, he lasted all of 8 weeks before being discharged for a weak back.
92
Are you sure he wasn't discharged for a weak mind?
10
@craig geary
"Alas, he lasted all of 8 weeks before being discharged for a weak back."
That is an unfair attack of John Boehner. When he graduated in 1968 from Moeller he ENLISTED in the US Navy. He wasn't drafted, didn't become a CO, did NOT get five deferments as Dick Cheney did or end up in a "champagne" division" of a Texas National Air Guard!
He had scoliosis, a specific anatomical problem, and was honorably discharged after 8 weeks. It wasn't a character flaw. At least he tried!
"Alas, he lasted all of 8 weeks before being discharged for a weak back."
That is an unfair attack of John Boehner. When he graduated in 1968 from Moeller he ENLISTED in the US Navy. He wasn't drafted, didn't become a CO, did NOT get five deferments as Dick Cheney did or end up in a "champagne" division" of a Texas National Air Guard!
He had scoliosis, a specific anatomical problem, and was honorably discharged after 8 weeks. It wasn't a character flaw. At least he tried!
1
That is interesting, the weak back part, news to me. So, assuming that is true, don't doubt you, but haven't seen substantiated records which are probably hard to dig up, add the barkeep's son to the many other evaders of actual military service during wars. Let's recap: Dick Cheney, Mitt Romney, Bill Krystal, Bush's envoy to the Unied Nations with the bushy mustache, Rush Limbaugh, and many senior senators still in the Senate. Others like George W. Bush were sheltered in place in the National Guard or released from the military under questionable circumstances such as Mitch McConnell. I suspect many, if not all, had friends in high places to turn to for help. Exceptions like John McCain are rare in the neo con ranks however, and still they push for wars and oppose negotiations at every opportunity. It is quite unfortunate that we do not have an informed and actively voting population. Not only is Social Security, women's health, Medicare, Affordable Care Act, Wall Street reform in danger of attacks and reversals, so too does a reasonable approach to foreign policy hang in the balance. There is not one GOP candidate wanting to be president who is a rational actor in that arena.
3
Here's a challenge, Maureen. Run for office.
Better yet, do something with your life other than mock those who did it their way, working hard and achieving something with their lives.
At least Boehner has made a difference in the big picture.
Boehner will be remembered as Speaker of The House of Representatives of the United States of America, for good or for bad.
A poor man coming up who made good the hard way: he worked bloody hard and is living the fruits of his efforts.
You well be remembered for ? For what you say?
For what?
What have you done other than mock?
I must admit, you're pretty good at mocking.
Better yet, do something with your life other than mock those who did it their way, working hard and achieving something with their lives.
At least Boehner has made a difference in the big picture.
Boehner will be remembered as Speaker of The House of Representatives of the United States of America, for good or for bad.
A poor man coming up who made good the hard way: he worked bloody hard and is living the fruits of his efforts.
You well be remembered for ? For what you say?
For what?
What have you done other than mock?
I must admit, you're pretty good at mocking.
5
You forgot one small detail: John Boehner is a public servant. It doesn't matter where he came from, how hard he worked, or what he achieved with *his* life. His job is to make help other people make their lives better. Over the past 5 years, he's made "a difference in the big picture," alright. For the worse. By that measure, he's failed, even if his is a rags-to-riches story.
139
"Lying in a hammock at his new condo in Marco Island, Fla., the speaker of the House is even closing in on his goal of getting darker than the oxblood leather wingback chair in his Capitol office."
John Boehner always wanted to be Cuban ... like his best-bros' Fidel and Raoul!
John Boehner always wanted to be Cuban ... like his best-bros' Fidel and Raoul!
3
It occurs to me that Ms. Dowd may be the only person in America who's actually hoping for a Clinton/Bush rematch.
33
How about an Obama/Bush rematch instead? In a Michelle versus Jeb match, we would see some real history made. Besides, why keep trading the presidency between the same two dysfunctional families when we've got a functional family to pass it off to?
10
Seems like satire but I wish it were real.
Welcome back, Maureen!
Welcome back, Maureen!
9
Thank God ... you're "finally" back!
11
Orange is the new speaker, lol.
I read Mitt may challenge Jeb. How about a column giving us a preview of this battle? Supposedly there is a history there.
I read Mitt may challenge Jeb. How about a column giving us a preview of this battle? Supposedly there is a history there.
7
The news Saturday reported the most fanatical of Boehner's Tea Party brigade praising him. He hadn't restored them to committees. (Guess tossing them off was to use the press to mislead the low-engagement crowd.)
They were praising Boehner for incorporating their ideas in the House bills just passed. It was their ideas that made the anti-immigration bill far more harsh.
Looks like we'll be in for two years of the John and Mitch "Bad cop - Good cop," act.
John's wild bunch will pass harsh bills and send them up to Mitch.
Mitch's buttoned-down bunch will soften the edges and send them back to John's bunch, who'll probably go along, send it back to the Senate, pass it, and send it to the President - who'll veto their perfidious bills that pound the poor, milk the middle class, and destroy our environment.
After the veto, the John and Mitch roadshow will go before cameras and whine, "We compromised, how come the President can't?" (I don't know. Probably because the voters who elected Obama don't want to be abused by the tiny number of angry voters who prevailed in the last election?)
Now is when we need a flood of political cartoons in our news media. Voters no longer read. That's why political cartoons were heavily used until the 1970s. That's our situation again. We're in dire need of a medium that, with a single glance, can potently convey an entire commentary. Mitch and John are betting the media can't reveal their treachery to the voters.
Glad you're back, Maureen!
They were praising Boehner for incorporating their ideas in the House bills just passed. It was their ideas that made the anti-immigration bill far more harsh.
Looks like we'll be in for two years of the John and Mitch "Bad cop - Good cop," act.
John's wild bunch will pass harsh bills and send them up to Mitch.
Mitch's buttoned-down bunch will soften the edges and send them back to John's bunch, who'll probably go along, send it back to the Senate, pass it, and send it to the President - who'll veto their perfidious bills that pound the poor, milk the middle class, and destroy our environment.
After the veto, the John and Mitch roadshow will go before cameras and whine, "We compromised, how come the President can't?" (I don't know. Probably because the voters who elected Obama don't want to be abused by the tiny number of angry voters who prevailed in the last election?)
Now is when we need a flood of political cartoons in our news media. Voters no longer read. That's why political cartoons were heavily used until the 1970s. That's our situation again. We're in dire need of a medium that, with a single glance, can potently convey an entire commentary. Mitch and John are betting the media can't reveal their treachery to the voters.
Glad you're back, Maureen!
185
Liam Jumper: your comment is wittier and sharper than the columns you're commenting on (though Ms. Dowd's is pretty good today). Keep 'em coming.
5
In England they have the house of Lords.
Here we have the house of Prevaricators.
Here we have the house of Prevaricators.
138
Please let us not forget "Obstructionists"
5
Might I say...."nefarious prevaricators"...
2
I do not like Boehner one bit
Am sorry he survived that hit,
By Webster, Yoho,
That's how these things go,
And yet he's still here unlike Mitt.
And yet in a dollop of dolor
That goes with Husky Orange color,
From a tanning machine,
Lucky that he's not green,
The energy source should be Solar.
Am sorry he survived that hit,
By Webster, Yoho,
That's how these things go,
And yet he's still here unlike Mitt.
And yet in a dollop of dolor
That goes with Husky Orange color,
From a tanning machine,
Lucky that he's not green,
The energy source should be Solar.
170
Mo, it's hard to imagine a bleaker scenario than being John Boehner, alone with our thoughts.
Maybe in Marco Island, at least he'll look around and wonder what the place will look like when global warming turns golfing there into a water sport ?
Maybe in Marco Island, at least he'll look around and wonder what the place will look like when global warming turns golfing there into a water sport ?
268
Poor Boehner. He could have been a contender, instead of a bum. He just needed to fight the good fight and help run the country rather than help the ignorant and the evil tear it down. Boehner invited in the Tea Party with open arms, thinking that they would energize a moribund and defeated G.O.P. They were throwbacks to the '50s, spewing veiled racist barbs, hurling insults, calling the president a liar, and preaching a kind of political fundamentalism that hadn't been seen for a long time. What's not to love? Besides, he'd keep them on a short leash.
Not. He discovered too late that that the leash was in their hands, and he was feeling the pinch.
So Boehner's place in history will be associated with the least effective, most recalcitrant and dysfunctional House in living memory. The country lost years of effective leadership at a time when leadership was needed most. The government was shut down, our credit rating was threatened, and endless time was wasted in a war on the poor, and in trying to kill affordable health care. Bereft of ideas, Boehner's brigade could only hobble, cripple and plunder.
I think he knows it, and I think it shows. They say that envy is green and sadness is blue. Maybe shame is orange.
Not. He discovered too late that that the leash was in their hands, and he was feeling the pinch.
So Boehner's place in history will be associated with the least effective, most recalcitrant and dysfunctional House in living memory. The country lost years of effective leadership at a time when leadership was needed most. The government was shut down, our credit rating was threatened, and endless time was wasted in a war on the poor, and in trying to kill affordable health care. Bereft of ideas, Boehner's brigade could only hobble, cripple and plunder.
I think he knows it, and I think it shows. They say that envy is green and sadness is blue. Maybe shame is orange.
691
Any chance gemli will score an NYT op-ed op-ed column?
113
I sure enjoy your posts "gemli." They are well-written, insightful and spot on. Thanks. Keep up the good work. Glad Maureen is back too. Boehner is looking more like Obama with that hearty tan he sports. Is this an unconscious wanna-be or something like pe*is envy?
23
Correction: U.S. debt was not just threatened. It WAS downgraded.
7
Boehner reminds me of one of those mediocre teachers who manages to get himself promoted to school principal and is so thrilled with himself that he decides he will enhance his popularity by befriending the teenage rat packs, gangs, and scorch-earth rebels occupying time and space in the school, just waiting for a chance to showcase themselves and throw the school into chaos.
With Principal Boehner expending so much energy trying to protect his position in order to contain and control the Yahoos and Gomerts, the saner and more moderate teachers and students in the school feel neglected and disgusted. Some of the better ones leave, while the word goes out that Boehner's school House is a haven for crazies, screw-ups, and bomb throwers.
So instead of walking away with a solid legacy of constructive legislation helping his working-class people when they needed it most during an economic crisis, Boehner made a conscious decision to squander his leadership by showing off and being rude and irresponsible to the school Superintendent, nor can he exercise much influence over the tea party enfants terrible.
Too bad Boehner did not know how to control the classroom. We and our nation pay the price.