Why is it so hard to find you like-minded people in the real world?? Feeling so alone with my(32f) existential/antinatalist thoughts.

hey at least we have the internet :) can't imagine being of this mindset in a place or time where there was no way to reach out to like minded people.
I would go completely insane if I didn't know i wasn't the only one... Ty for reaponding
it's honestly a double edged sword. I've subbed real life interaction with the internet.
I can't find like-minded people on one of my strongest opinions :(
Thanks for the Internet and Reddit I have found this community with the like-minded people.
Well, they say cancer spreads easily. We're going against thousands of years of social conditioning, religion, biological urges, ignorance, lack of sexual education and contraceptives. Sterilization not being at option for many, rape, forced marriages, etc. are also part of the problem.
I'm tired of trying to find like-minded people. I have this community. As I have no faith in humanity I really don't need anything more than to be as alone and calm as I can. Social interaction is kind of like a legal procedure than I need to engage in from time to time not to go totally crazy. Let me not suffer as much as I can.
Wholeheartedly agree. Would be really cool to have some of you as actual friends, not just virtual ones.
I've personally found that secular humanists, liberal religious people and serious Buddhists are fairly tolerant of my philosophical pessimism. Not they agree but it's not automatically evil or incomprehensible to them. For example a progressive priest I know was telling me about how we should build the Kingdom of Christ on Earth and I said that it sounded nice (his version of it) but even if possible, I'd consider a Red Button scenario a quicker way to end suffering. Then I said I thought Job had the right idea about cursing the day of his birth. He said he could see my point as he's suffered from a painful intestinal disease for over 30 years.
Because I can’t see myself sharing my opinions with my coworkers. Four were pregnant last year, three this year, some are on their third kid and quite frankly my entire family is in a religious cult that says “be fruitful and multiply”. I have a few childfree friends but they’d think I’m insane if I shared about my opinions about AN even though it’s similar. Funnily enough one of the pregnant ones mentioned about veganism/pollution and current state of affairs, tiptoed around overpopulation so it’s hopeless. I lose interest in people once they become parents because all they do is talk about their kids and how they didn’t sleep bla bla bla etc. I just kind of reach out to other ANs on this sub.
Yeah, all my friends/family/acquaintances are either currently pregnant, have had, or are planning to have kids. Can’t exactly go up to them and be like WTF YOU MORON CURSE YOUR SELFISHNESS. I have few enough friends already. I can bring it up with my male friends who haven’t had kids though. They seem to get it. Or at least they don’t care enough to be bothered by it lol
All of my coworkers are single moms...definitely doesn't help things
I tried to talk to people about this, The reaction I got is unreal. I stopped. Still, I try every now and then, maybe...
I understand that feeling. I’ve also told strangers, friends, and family about my antinatalist beliefs, and have mainly received unfavorable reactions. It’s quite fascinating.
What was the reaction?
Yeah! I never realized how we're all trained to think the same things until I tried to open up my thought with someone else. The response i got is is no response. They didn't even bother spending bai-npower on that thought. The idea wasn't even remotely on their radar.
I feel the same. I recently met someone who seemed so thoughtful and grounded, who I thought could be antinatalist based on other discussions we'd had. I have never met anyone in real life who thinks this way. But once we started talking about it, he made a comment about how he would have kids because they could experience happiness (even though we agreed suffering is inherent to life). I was crushed, it was so disappointing to hear something like that from an otherwise intelligent and thoughtful person.
You can point out to him that he is mistaking 'creating people for happiness' with 'creating happiness for people'. The non-existent are not deprived of any pleasure. Ask him how many times has he felt sorry for the non-existent Martians who could've populated Mars and enjoyed their existence.
Also that happiness does not compensate or erase suffering. No amount of happiness can compensate suffering beyond a certain threshold. Negative strikes twice as harder as positive.
Hugging you back :-)
we are rare but we exist ..
Sending a hug back :,)
This sub is everything
Because people suck.
I recently shared my antinatalist views with a real life friend because she wouldn't stop showing me pictures of her two kids (one new born) and yeah, I'm not sure if that's a friendship that'll ever be the same.
Big mistake.
I'm the same, (32m) and anyone I meet just wants to talk about babies.
I want to be in a position where I can work part-time before I'm 40.
Society is structured in a way to shame women that don’t want to shit out a parasite.
Life is a scam and people are cultishly believing that life is great because if it isn't then they have made a huge mistake giving birth. Can't have that. Life is great and I gave them a gift... Fucking breeders
Antinatalists need their own dating app
send virtual hug back
Well we're not very numerous, sadly. I share your distress, I didn't find any like minded people outside of internet. All the people I spoke about were either utterly disgusted, mean, or sad that I will not experience the joy of becoming a "daddy", (also a few nihilists said i was right but not for the same reason so I don't agree)
People feel personally attacked and can get surprisingly aggressive. Dropping impersonal hints is a good way to identify others in a crowd.
Me too. Im 20 and have no friends because of this. But im not going to change just so people will like me.
I find most socialization awkward and uncomfortable but any social interaction is preferable to being alone with my thoughts.
Natalism is ingrained in our instincts. People breed mindlessly. We may be the first generation to actually acknowledge the issue of natalism.
Hugs. I understand :(
Hugs 🤗
I just turned 18 and i feel so selfish that I'm glad my older sister will marry and have children so my parents can have their "fair share" of grandchildren I live in turkey and my sister lives in US so it makes me feel a bit relieved knowing my future nephew/niece won't have to live in the shit hole that is the middle east. I'm glad she is making someone suffer, and by doing so unknowingly helping me a lot with my parents because they won't make it miserable for the rest of my life. I might sound selfish and i fucking hate myself but I can't stop this comforting feel and I'm deeply sorry for the little ones who will be brought upon here without their consent. Now back to me I know I'll have bunch of girlfriends in the future but turkey is a fairly conservative place and no matter how progressive the woman I may fall in love their parents wouldn't let us be unmarried or without any children. I hope I find the right person in the right circumstances because I may be young but if these 18 years of suffering have taught me anything, it's that similar people with similar pains can help eachother soothe the suffering they'll endure for the rest of their lives. And finally, sorry for my bed england.
Got one here!
I think it is so hard to find like-minded people because we are biologically programmed to love/have kids. It's beautiful, practical outliers like us that know the truth.
yeah....i hear ya...32 male....its hard out there
"Hell is other people" hug Are you feom europe?
What this (32f) in the title for?
Hey be nice. Maybe she wants to find a bf or a gf. Whats wrong with that.
Context only