Off topic: What are my odds of beating this drug test?

My guys, I’m in a dilemma. I have been offered a position in the highest paying hospital in Pennsylvania, but I think the last time I smoked a blunt was last Thursday or Friday. I have little to no body fat, and walk a lot and drink a lot of water. I never detox with chemicals or drugs. What are my chances of beating this drug test? I have been in a dilemma similar to this, but not well rounded on how long THC metabolizes in the body. Thanks in advance, niggas!

If you gonna use someone else piss tape it to your inner thigh so it’s body temp
😭😭 this the same advice you gave me
Go to walmart and get a drug test and find out?
Saving comment for future reference. They give same day results?
fr this yo best bet😂
Synthetic urine is 100% youre best bet. Strap it to your upper thigh to keep it warm and sneak it in. You can also get this gelatin thing called Certo thats supposed to coat your kidneys temporarily for your drug test. But Certo makes your piss real clear so they might think you were trying to drink a ton of water to cover up and they may ask you to take another one, so if you go that route make sure you take a B12 supplement before too to make it more yellow.
Fruit pectin. Buy it in the store where the jelly is. Its used to make jam and shit
Mix it in a large Gatorade bottle, drink it, the drink 2 of those Gatorade bottles worth of water.
Not to geek out, but it really works on a cellular level to clean it out of your body.
I have not had a drug test I have yet to beat (Blood, urine, saliva). Works in as little as 12 hours prior to the test. Many of my coworkers can confirm
Pro tip: the amount of time THC is stored in your body is more relative to your body fat amount than the amount consumed.
Edit: Some buddies of mine in the lab tell me that they can now detect synthetic, animal, and urine by gender. Don't know how accurate that is, but I keep it in mind.
Saving your future reference. Thank you.
“Thanks in advance, niggas!”
You not black 😭😭😭🤦🏽‍♂️
Bro, what? Because of my dialect, I’m not black? 😂
Right, that was so weird and unnecessary 😂
That fake piss called 'U Pass' down south would do the trick, but they only sell them down south like Georgia and Alabama. Maybe u can order one off of Amazon or online. Hope u pass and get that position/promotion. 💯 good luck! 🤞🏽
My guy you wanna work at a hospital with this coronavirus going on ?
This is the same hospital I worked at before, where they’ve treated someone with Ebola, lol. Highest paid hospital in the state of PA.
If you don't get this one cuz of the weed. Quit the shit so next time you'll be ready. All these things they listed are not a 100% pass. Only thing Is actually being sober for months and it sucks weed stays in your system so long.
Shit they need to take weed off the "drug" test for drugs lol. I'll smoke that shit everyday again.
I’m not a smoker for real, though. I don’t know how to roll up, so that should tell you something, lmao. I only smoke when my girl rolls up. I agree that every thing listed here isn’t a 100% hit, and I agree even stronger with the fact that they need to take weed off drug tests. Shit does not give the same effect as hardcore drugs that mentally incapacitate you.
If you dont smoke regularly bro then don’t stress it theres a 85% you good. If you wanna be cautious, drink hella water the day before the test, and i mean where ur pissing every 30 min, then around 12 (if youre going to be sleeping during this time)hours before the test literally do not drink anything at all. Right before the test chug as much water as u possibly can, it’s dangerous as fuck to do often and is bad for you but this is a one time thing. You’ll literally piss straight water and the thc would be so diluted(if it even is in your urine anymore) that it wouldn’t show.
Hey listen 2 me if you use someone elses piss throw it in the microwave 4 10 seconds then put the bottle under your arm pit 4 about 15 minutes. You can either keep it under your arm pit or wear tighty whiteys and crotch it when your walking into your piss test appointment. You will not pass your test if you don't use fake piss or someones clean piss weed stays in your system 4 about 28 days.
Buy the detox blocker drink. Works for test not screens. It takes a hour to work after you drink it. Last 5 hours, pee as much as possible after you drink it. Submit your piss in the 2-3 hr window
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Drink water till your piss clear
Bro I do it all the time piss in a condom , wear pants with a zipper ... but the condom in a thermos with hot water on the way there or if you got a car put it in the front window with the defrost on , then zip up the end of the condom in your pants or wear compression drawls or pants and put it in there ... you should be good . I do it all the time bro it never failed me
Look up the Certo method. I just did it 3 weeks ago for a job and passed. It went to a lab too. Super easy and super cheap.
Just drink a shit load of water
If I fail, you think I can request another drug test on the basis that I’m trying to clean my system?
Get one of those $60 detox drinks from your local 420 shop and follow the instructions, I’ve seen numerous people complete felony probation with those.
If they’re not gonna watch you pee then just use someone else’s; rinse out a travel size shampoo bottle extremely well and wear some tighty whities or briefs that will cup it intimately to your balls. Throw it in a microwave for no more than 10 seconds, about 30-60 minutes before you drop and you’ll be good, just make sure it’s not TOO hot when you hand it off so blow on it if you have to until you see solid green on the strip. Your body temp will maintain the 90-100 degrees for a surprisingly long time down there.
Good luck!
What hospital, so I can get that job😂😂😂😂😂
Depends on your frequency lately, potency body fat, etc. Youre looking low end 10-14 days and up to a month.
Let us know so it can help others, good luck bruh
I made the mistake of asking this question today on the day of my drug test, but the situation is the same. I smoked last Friday, drug test came up today, I took it and asked this question right before taking it. As mentioned before, though, I was in this same predicament twice and got both jobs, but you never know sometimes. Am I good?
Oh yeah, and the hospital is Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania (HUP).
Honestly if youre in the market for a job you gotta be smart and just stop smoking. Most places, once you get in theyre not going to do periodic testing. Be smart. You losing out on good money/benefits over some weed?
If you haven't taken the test already............
Don't buy it from a headshop cause it might be fake, order it from the website and buy the thing that you can strap it to your leg. Have it shipped overnight or whatever you need in time for your DT.
Might cost you around 100 bucks plus shipping but it works. I have used this shit like 4-5 times already, I make 6 figures so can't afford to have my test fail.
I really hope you see this shit.
Saving comment for future reference.
Best bet is to get somebody to do it for u... don’t get a girl tho
False, that is fine. Only clean person I knew was my friend who just had a baby and was still breast feeding so she was drug free so I used her piss and passed a test/got the job.
Certo works
Pretty sure its more of the flush and creatine really that works with that method.
Yeah just take somebody piss store it in ya nuts(wear briefs) or tape it to ya leg as suggested I personally store it in my nuts cuz it’s easy and ain’t nobody pllooking at ya nuts ain’t tryna catch no case lmao the leg I would b too scared it would fall down
Get the fake piss comes with a hand warmer too. I tried it for this union gig I got now. Besides that, I used other people piss. Failed once because I forgot to warm it up. 😂
CERTO JELL. I’m telling you. It’s the best method
Bro I would advice you go for a drug test first and know the result, you can get the actual result same day.
if you smoked a full blunt last week u aint gonna pass. Synthetic urine
No, it wasn’t a full blunt. It was a blunt in rotation, I went in rotation twice, so maybe like 4-8 puffs altogether.
Yooooo, I'm late but I literally just passed a drug test a week ago using fake piss.
I used quick fix plus, bought it at a smoke shop.
Just gotta follow the directions. My test was just a regular piss test.
Ask A Homeless Woman For Her Pee And You Gucci🏅
Why, so he can test positive for dope and coke? Something like 80 percent of homeless people are struggling with substance abuse.
That whole cup gone fucking melt.
How to catch HIV 101
I'd bring some clean piss if I were you
i was in a similar situation and i just drank A LOT of water and i passed it. But your best bet is synthetic piss like some others already said
Use quickfix. The synthetic urine. It passes a lab test, trust me. You can even shake it to make it foamy to look like piss even more.
synthetic urine is undefeated
Nigga go to a AskDrugs , don't turn this sub into those "oFF TOpiC
Bro, you the only cornball to post something negative. Move on.