I've never commented on a story before but after reading this I figured I needed to.
I actually suffered a similar heart attack a little over 2 years ago in November 2016. I was younger than the author though. It happened less than 2 months after my 30th birthday. My father had a quadruple bypass when he was 38 so I figured I would have to face heart disease at one point or another.
I didn't have the symptoms that were normally associated with a heart attack. It just felt like I was having a bad case of heartburn for about a week but then I collapsed in my living room floor. Thankfully, my best friend was there and called 911 quickly. He then had to learn chest compressions on the fly. When I was taken to the hospital, they cooled my body temperature down to preserve brain function. After I was warmed up, they took me to the cath lab. They found a 100 percent blockage in my LAD and 80 percent in my RCA. I was in the hospital for almost 2 weeks and had to go to an inpatient rehab for another week. I don't have any memory of the days leading up to my heart attack of the week after.
This happened on the Friday after the 2016 election. When I finally came to in the hospital, I thought Hillary was president. You can probably imagine my shock when I was told that I just had a heart attack and Trump also won.
466
@Evan I am glad you made it! I had a heart attack at age 37, but my blockages are just the opposite of yours: 80% in the LAD and 100% blockage of the RCA. Neither of them have been stented; they said they can't reach the LAD lesion, and since the RCA isn't a major artery, they said there wouldn't be much benefit to stenting it now.
14
I am sorry that we as a country put this monster in place(not me!). Glad your heart survived that shock!!!
14
@Evan
There is nothing more stressful than being born and bred and still living while black African American in Donald Trump's 58 % of white 2016 majority voters United States of America.
Mr. Lee alludes to the disproportionately negative outcomes for black heart health conditions and medical problems. That same reality attaches to every black medical problem. And the emotional and mental toll is as hidden and ignored as are the physical problems.
Medical care professionals are not free of bigotry.
" I am an invisible man" from " Invisible Man" Ralph Ellison
12
Thank you for this article. I had a heart attack in October 2018, 2 stents places in an artery 100% blocked. Two weeks ago another stent was placed in a new artery, 80% blocked. I have been struggling with the emotion and struggling with putting it into words. You did for me. It is with you everyday.
13
Like you I had a sudden heart attack at age 63 despite being a marathon runner and having normal cholesterol. Unfortunately I was in Thailand 6 hours from medical care. After a 2 hour speed boat ride and 2 hour ambulance ride I was treated in a hospital near Malaysia with a cardiac stent. I infaracted but lost very little cardiac function. The experience left me like you thinking constantly about another heart attack. I also had a great fear of travel. This has improved but I still hesitate to travel remotely .
18
Thank you for sharing your experience. It helps me to understand what my father must have been feeling after his first heart attack at age 40, until his fatal attack at age 50. In 1962, a Bypass or stent option was barely on the menu. My sister and I knew he had been “ sick”, but no one talked to us about the seriousness of his illness. . I’m sure my parents thought they were shielding us from their own fear. I have no idea if it would’ve helped two elementary school kids to know their father was due to die any day, so I’m glad now for medical advances and support groups.
6
Thank you for sharing your story and expressing your feelings so eloquently. I too suffered a heart attack of the same nature five years ago at the end of this month. Since that time my personality has changed (I suspect that I have PTSD it’s just that no one else will say it) in many of the ways which you expressed. I am certainly more sensitive to the little things in life (sounds, sights, music, thoughts), and find myself crying for no particular reason. I have changed my priorities in life, not so much consciously, and find it difficult to concentrate or focus on work. Instead, I live each day focused on the people in my life and the beauty which surrounds me. This has been very difficult for others to process around me (and for myself) and they don’t understand why I do not want to throw myself back into work like before my heart attack. I accept the idea that someday I will die, but I now enjoy more fully every day of life. I just wish that others around me could understand then I’m a different person, more frail but with a broader perspective. Thank you for sharing your story with us it is of help to me in my healing each day.
4
I’ve not had a heart attack, but after a family history of heart disease (my parents both died in their fifties) and having smoked for 25 years, I was not sutprised when the health club I had joined advised that I should see a cardiologist before they would allow me to begin exercising with them. What a smart move on their part and I am forever indebted to my friend who encoraged me to start a fitness program with him. Long storyshort, I had my first open heart surgery at age 43 and a second some 18 years later. Having now retired at nearly 77, I take the words of my current specialist very seriously when he reminds me that “ his job is to keep me alive so that I die from something else.” Eating right, exercising regularly, taking good drugs all have helped me avoid fearing “I’m going to die.” And what a ride its been.
5
Love and peace and healing to you, Mr Lee.
7
At the age of 36, I was suffering from angina which was misdiagnosed and treated as acid reflux. Even after I suffered a heart attack, my internist dismissed my concerns even though both of my parents had died young of heart attacks. I was a young, non-smoking, physically active vegetarian woman. So I was not really looked at as an individual but rather as a statistic.
I persisted until attention was paid, and I was finally diagnosed with blockage of the LAD. My open heart surgery was many years ago, and I am doing really well. But I had to work hard to get help.
I just want to remind people that there still may be a bias against taking younger heart attack victims, especially women, seriously. Please keep trying. It may save your life.
25
Heart disease and heart attacks are the LEADING cause of death for women.
Not breast cancer or any other cancer....HEART ATTACKS.
Even after accounting for age, within a year of a first heart attack, survival rates are lower in women than in men. Within five years, 47% of the women will die, develop heart failure, or suffer from a stroke, compared with 36% of the men.
[PDF] from: https://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/the-heart-attack-gender-gap
Symptoms in women can be different from men. Often their pain is in the back, extreme fatigue, shortness of breath.....from:
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/women-dont-ignore-3-subtle-heart-attack-symptoms/
20
Powerful.
7
Love ❤️ these feel good stories, from the New, New York Times!
5
Except, of course, today, in repsonse to this NYT article, which really knocked me out of the park, just like all of you.
So, I've said enough for now, and thank you for listening, with your hearts, and hopefully now TO your hearts.
If you feel the tightness, run (slowly), don't walk to the hospital.
But on your way there, have a dream.
That one day, little black boys and girls, little white boys and girls, all little boys and girls, (and everyone else) might enjoy every next moment in life, for this is truly a fleeting, temporary stay, and the most valuable 'thing' that any of us have is time. MLK day is now a benchmark in my life, a reminder, forever.
So today, don't judge me be the color of my spin, but by the content of my catheter.
Sincerely, and with love,
-G.D. Hawaya, Somewhere on Kape Kawd
3
is there a doctor in the history of the human
race who has not told a patient "if you had
not arrived when you did, you would be dead? I wish the writer well,but the next
time a doctor says that,tell him or her that
you too have watched TV medical shows.
please save my life,spare me the melodrama.
11
Get a dog and go for long walks in the woods and fields.
It will change you.
12
I haven't been able to afford food for a week, so really...
Who cares?
3
As a colon cancer survivor I identify with your emotional story.
I have changed my diet and maintain a healthy active lifestyle but as time passes Carpe Diem has become my mantra. Also, I tell all to get a colonoscopy, don't wait till you're 50.
8
It's nice that you had health care, otherwise your wife would be a widow.
5
I had a heart attack at 39. My son was born 3 years later. He is 22 and graduating this Spring from Rice University. I am alive and smiling.
Get over it. This happens to people all the time and they deal with it and they don't whine.
2
Risk factors are important. What about sickle trait (leading to intravascular sludging)?
It’s a known risk factor for pulmonary embolism.
He survived his unlike a friend of mine who had his grandfather, father, and finally sucumbed himself to a heart attack all at the same age... 29. Nothing could predict what day or how to prevent it. He was gone in an instant. Heriditary? Another had lost almost sixty pounds, and quit drinking beer and smoking and fell over outside on the doctor's sidewalk after being given a perfect bill of health. That heart specialist said it humbled him for thew rest of his career. You just never know.
12
On subsequent walks through our neighborhood, the tightness would return, but I didn't associate it with exertion or incline, and then it would subside again. I figured it was heartburn from the quarts of coffee that I guzzled daily. Until...
...the night I set out for the hilly golf course near our house. The star gazing, the moonrises over Bawstin Hahba, the sparkling city lights, the coyotes, and the occasional Horned Owl sighting made this place great for a walk. I always went to the top of the highest fairway, a stiff peak at a pretty drastic angle. I'd been up-and-back a million thymes.
The tightness began as it had all those other thymes in the previous month. But yours-truly-knucklehead finally put two and two together. About half way up, the tightness seemed to increase with each next step. I pushed on, and by three-quarters of the way up, my chest felt like a it was being pulled apart. Then, finally at the top, like I was going to explode. I actually turned my eyes to the skies and called out (to no Being in particluar) "Oh my Gawd! I'm gonna vfahkin' die right now!"
I went to the hospital friday morning, and the cariodlogist told me I'd need more tests. Within hours though, he cancelled them because he was already sure I'd be headed to the city, Beth Israel, ASAP. I was that far along. He admonished me to do nothing the whole weekend. Monday was MLK, so I sat tight another day...
1
By the time you hit 69, you wonder if you'll make it to your 70's, even if you've never had a heart attack. You wonder how it's going to happen. You know it will but you don't know how. This article describes one way. I still wonder.
2
I can assure you all that depression is real, tangible, and perhaps even more affective than the physical injuries themselves.
I do rise each day to love and smile and celebrate sunsets, oysters...the good things, because someday I won't rise.
My twins are almost sixteen (an essay for a different day, ha ha), they don't vape, no mascara, no boyfriends, good grades, etc. My son is almost thirteen, one of the most joyful, funny, intersting, motivated little guys you'll ever meet. They have been the energy, the life-force that keeps me going. I love them so much.
I routinely cross the Bourne Bridge and the Cape Cod Canal, which has become symbolic of my strength and will to continue; I haven't jumped yet!
Another close friend, sober thirty years, was orphaned along with six siblings when his mother disrobed and walked into the Canal in mid-December and froze to death, despairing over the loss of her own husband. My friend was nine or ten at the time. This friend also now has children, and is also now divorced. I thank him with all my [remaining] heart for his counseling over the years, but especially these last two. (I wish he'd stop vaping, so he doesn't end up being scowled at and sawed-in-half by Dr. Chen Li-Zheng, but...)
I've stopped going shirtless at the beach, now a member of the "zipper club"; I don't have enough chest hair to camouflage the giant scar, and the less I have to remember or discuss it, the better.
1
I didn't have a heart attack. At age 56 I had to have my Aortic valve replaced with a tissue valve. I didn't stare down the barrel of a gun, I was facing a slow certain death as my heart struggled to pump blood though my body. I could actually hear it as I lay in bed at night. The sound was like what you hear during an echo cardiogram or when an obstetrician uses ultrasound to hear a baby's heart beat. Swish, Swish. I was hard to sleep, at times.
I had to move up the surgery as my conditioned worsened. I wanted to have my hair cut before I went into the hospital the following week. I began to pass out in the barber chair. I was on the hospital that night.
During the eight week recovery, I sent a note to my fellow coworkers. The message was simple.
Always listen to your heart... Especially when it is trying to kill you.
I knew years ahead of time what was in store for me. Too may people have signals that they ignore. Tightness in the chest. Shortness of breath. Chest pains or pain down the left arm. They are all to often ignored. I would rather look foolish in an emergency room, than be a corpse in the morgue.
You were lucky. Not all stories like yours have a happy ending like yours.
6
Mr. Trymaine Lee: Did your physicians identify any risk factors that made you susceptible to a heart attack, especially at a young age? Based upon your experience, could you please give the readers advice on how to prevent and to recognizing a heart attack? Thanks.
5
Heartfelt story! Glad you are still with us, and thriving! I propose a toast! Death, to the widow maker!!!
3
I had a similar experience at 37 with the same LAD artery. I'm 70 now, and I've survived heart attack, 18 stents, and a triple bypass. You can live a normal life span, just exercise regularly, and pay attention to what you feel, especially in your chest.
6
It's crucial to recognize that a heart attack is less often the end result of a 99 percent clogged artery reaching 100 percent and causing an infarct. In fact, the plaque in such arteries is often older, more stable, and thus less prone to rupture. Far more dangerous are the younger, unstable plaques which can rupture with little warning, often in arteries less than 50 percent occluded, often in younger individuals, with catastrophic results. Vulnerable plaques can be stabilized with a lower fat, plant-based diet. Such a regimen promotes the production of the vasodilator nitric oxide, and helps restructure existing plaque to make them more stable. Statins help in this regard, too. I am happy that the author survived this physical trauma, is processing the psychological trauma, and has lived to see another day. Many days, hopefully.
6
Mine was eerily similar to yours, though mine happened at age 65. I was an in-shape masters swimmer and rower, who ate a healthy diet. I felt some chest pains in the pool, but attributed it to a pulled pectoral muscle. Later that same morning, when I felt them again, I walked to a nearby teaching hospital. They kept me overnight, tested me, and said I was fine. I still did not feel right. Trying to cut the lawn a few days later, I had to stop. That night, I asked my son to drive me to the nearby suburban hospital. I too had 100% blockage of the LADCA. I too was lucky to be alive.
Here is the good news. That was more than 9 years ago. During a difficult first year of recovery, I got back to all my old activities. It was slow at first, but gradually, I rebuilt my strength and my self-confidence. Two years after the heart attack I was back to competing in swimming and rowing.
My doctor tells me I am doing fine, but I remind him that is what everyone told me before the heart attack. I know that there is always a risk, but I refuse to let it control my life. Call it stubbornness; call it denial.
Start back slowly. Rebuild your confidence along with your strength. You will have a lot of good years ahead of you.
Good luck!
13
In so many ways our normal American lifestyle, rushed, focused, always on, always going--is also killing us. Humans were not meant to be this frenzied without paying a price. Diet and sedentary living play a very significant role. People who live in "Blue Zones" live very differently and live long lives with robust health to the end. In some ways our "progress" is actually eating away at our very lives.
7
That's good to know. I will ask for that test. Thank you.
One thing I want people to know about my situation is that weight has never been an issue for me. I am a thin petite woman. So don't let an appearance of fitness fool you or the doctor. I am somewhat active and am conscientious about what I eat. Thus, some of this is genetics, too (the good and the bad).
Be well.
4
I had a heart attack "out of the blue" at age 62. In the preceding months I had chest pains during runs at about the 25-minute mark. I was referred to a cardiologist who gave me a treadmill stress test which I aced because it did not take me near the exertion level where the pains began. The moral of the story is that you cannot depend on current medical orthodoxy to correctly diagnose your individual situation. You can be "fine" one day and dead the next.
One more point. I do not live in constant fear of the next "big one" After watching my mother-in-law die an agonizing cancer death, I am heartened that hers will likely not be my fate. In the meantime, I enjoy every day of health and do not spoil it with dark fears of what lies ahead.
10
For those wondering whether you have a coronary artery blockage, you can go to many centers and have a calcium scan. Insurance won't pay but mine was only $99 and often there are Groupons. I went to get this under the advice of my cardiologist who didn't suspect anything wrong but just as a part of my workup. It showed a tiny plaque in my LAD and my risk of heart disease is less than 10% and at minimal risk of an MI. I will go for a repeat in a few years. I like the peace of mind from having this information.
4
Lazing around one evening I felt the strangest sensation in my chest. Like a monster was trying to get out. It didn’t hurt, but was so odd, and lasted for so long that I told my partner that I had to go to the emergency room.
At the emergency room they took me in right away because they suspected what I never imagined. EKG, blood tests, etc - all fine. It is my good luck that the emergency room Dr. convinced me to stay overnight. I did argue as I felt fine, but now I know that he suspected a heart attack.
When they woke me in the morning the doctor told me I had had a heart attack - that my Troponin level was high. WOW! 54 year old female, healthy, good eater, exerciser. So they then took me to have an angiogram. Good news, bad news! No blockages. None. Bad news - we do not know what caused your heart attack.
They sent me to a cardiologist - and he felt it was a rare cardiac spasm that caused the blockage to the heart. And I had damage to my heart.
After weeks of cardiac rehab, and finding the right medication (severe allergic reaction to one of the drugs landed me back in the emergency room!) to “keep my arteries open” as my cardiologist says, I am fine and have been for 10 years.
I still think about it as such a very strange bump in the road, but want the world to know that heart attacks come in all shapes and sizes. And they can be BIG heart attacks that don’t hurt.
19
We need a way to test people for clogged arteries. I only discovered that my arteries are clogged by happenstance.
I was on a medical search for why I suddenly developed ringing in my left ear. One unexplainable test result led to another referral and test until I was referred to a neurologist.
The neurologist could not explain the ringing in my ear but did tell me that me that I had plaque build-up in my arteries. I asked how bad, he said it was average for my age (early 50s) and that he had seen worse build-up in people in their 20s.
He gave me the whole spiel about adhering to a low fat/low cholesterol diet and routine exercise and to come back in two years to recheck my arteries.
Two years past, I went back to have my arteries checked again, the good news was that there was no change in the amount of blockage. The bad news was that there was no change in the amount of blockage despite my efforts to eat better and exercise more.
But the doctor left me with hope and it's all in my control. I can reduce the plaque build-up by working harder and being more committed and disciplined to eliminating fat and cholesterol in my diet. Just love yourself more... and you can do it!
"But the tipping point can occur quickly: “When underlying cholesterol and plaque in your vessels comes into contact with the bloodstream, the vigorous reaction creates blood clots,” Chetcuti says. “You could go from 20 percent blockage to 100 percent instantaneously.”
@Chris They do have a noninvasive test called a calcium scan. $99 at most hospitals/medical centers. Out of pocket cost only. I had mine and happy to know I am at almost not risk of MI.
2
That's good to know. I will ask for that test. Thank you. One thing I want people to know about my situation is that weight has never been an issue for me. I am a thin petite woman. So don't let an appearance of fitness fool you or the doctor. I am somewhat active and am conscientious about what I eat. Thus, some of this is genetics, too (the good and the bad). Be well.
3
In my training 30 years ago, I distinctly remember an elderly Southern gentlemen who came into the ER. This ER was one of the busiest in the country--a county hospital. He turned to me, placed his clenched fist on top of his heart, and said "Doctor--I had this feelin' in my chest and thought Jesus had come for me." This was "Levine's sign," a classic signal in medicine. We immediately put him in the cardiac resuscitation room, but he died 5 hours later from a massive heart attack despite all of our efforts.
I am very grateful for your success and can see how much gratitude you have purely for the ability to be alive and appreciate the time with your family. Your shock will eventually fade, with gratitude and appreciation being the best road to a cure. Enjoy your game of Uno.
2
@David, please be aware that while men may fairly commonly have this experience, women most often do not, and a fair number of men don't either--so folks, don't wait for it to come before you seek help.
2
I had a widow maker in 2011 only a few months after completing an Ironman. I was 41 and in the best shape of my life....so I thought. I'd smoked for 20 years until my late 30's and had a love affair with fast food in my 20's and part of my 30's. Couple with a stressful commute, a relationship that was at best mediocre and a stress filled job, family history of heart disease........this was of no surprise! Don't smoke and eat well! Watch your cholesterol and do a coronary calcium scan!
4
On the other hand, some perspective. Every pain is not a heart attack. Sometimes chest pain is the chili you had for dinner, or the V-8 juice you had at breakfast. Go through life afraid that everything is a heart attack will ruin your life and give you just as much trauma as a real heart attack would, and you might miss that ulcer you can have treated. If it's nasty and unusual, check it out, but don't assume anything about pain. It won't help to be petrified on top of your pain, and if you don't have pain, don't assume it's coming someday for sure. It's not coming for sure. A lot of people never have it.
Yes, I speak from experience.
3
It's remarkable that heart-attacks are so prevalent in the United States, given that it's preventable by change in life style based on everything I've read on the issue.
1
@ad
Five people I know who have had heart attacks exercised regularly, ate low fat diets and were not an ounce overweight, never smoked and drank only socially and minimally. So, life style is not necessarily preventive thought it likely plays a role in the survival of a cardiac event.
10
Way back when, there were public service announcements on TV that said the two warning signs for a heart attack were: a numbness in the left arm and, get this, a "tightness in the chest." In May 2015 at 65 I was swimming laps (as I always do, at least 28 days every month) when I felt a shooting pain in my oesophagus and it went into my throat and gums. Left arm fine. So I stopped swimming, stood there and asked myself "I wonder just what a tightness in the chest is." 13 hours later a friend insisted on taking me into a hospital (otherwise I would not have gone and might very well be writing these comments from heaven). The following morning I got a stent. Home the following day. Clearly I did not have a widow-maker, although the cardiologist insisted I needed a psychiatrist to deal with my denial. And I still don't know what "a tightness in the chest" is.
6
Having cared for many such patients as a cardiologist and having seen several doctors who ignored risk factors and atypical symptoms in such patients as an attorney, it is worth saying that the managed care and "less is more" mentalities of many medical journal editors and HMO medical directors have produced a saving dollars vs. saving lives reality in evaluation of patients like this. It is becoming quite common for such patients to be ignored by urgent care or ER care doctors and nurses -- or even in pre-operative evaluations. When they survive but suffer debilitating heart damage and go on disability roles, not only is it a personal tragedy, but taxpayers pick up the tab. We have the diagnostic tools to easily find "widow maker" coronary lesions before damage is done. What we don't have is the courage by most doctors to buck managed care/HMO directives to save money.
5
This piece was so familiar. My father had his first heart attack at the age of 31, a few months after his and my mother’s first wedding anniversary. He was told that the longest survival of similar patients at that time was five years. 5 years later I was born. 3 years later he survived a cancer scare. 25 years later he began a twelve year battle with heart failure. While I wish he’d won that battle, a 5 year prognosis for a young man turned into a 37 year life with a happy marriage and seeing his daughter grow up and get married herself. As Lee says, “every small moment” was not “overflowing with emotion” but we were (and still are) always present, despite the anxiety and trauma, because we want to live.
9
I was also 38 when I had a MI. 6 months later I had triple bypass surgery. That was 15 years ago. The only risk factor I had was family history - dad died at 52 from a heart attack.
I went through a period of not interested in anything. As I recovered slowly my mental focus got better.
Today I eat well and exercise regularly. Most important of all I make time to do things that put me in my happy place. I have hiked up 15,000 ft mountains and been on a fishing boat for 10 days straight out in the Pacific. Is the possibility of another heart attack in my thoughts? Absoutely yes. If it does happen I will be doing something I love in my happy place.
8
Thanks for sharing. Though considerably older than you at 68, I suffered a heart attack this past October. It came out of nowhere as well. I don't smoke, my weight is reasonably good, I go to the gym five days a week, three on the treadmill and two on weights. How could this have happened to me. Like Dr. Stolbach said though, you can go one of two ways on how you react. I'm proceeding as if nothing happened, at least mentally. Physically of course I'm taking it slow and steady at the gym now. But I'm a survivor. I had a mini-stroke in 2013 and now a major heart attack in 2018. I just keep on going until whatever comes along to knock me down keeps me down. Until then, I choose to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep moving.
8
My uncle died of MI when he was 38. That was more than 45 years ago. The prognosis is so much better today. Hope your worries continue to abate as you enjoy each new day.
5
Just as a supplement to this good piece by a reporter I have enjoyed on NBC. There is another heart issue that is often undiagnosed or misdiagnosed, and leads to syncope which can also be misdiagnosed. HCM, hypertrophic cardiomyopathy is the leading cause of sudden death in young athletes and overly prevalent in young black men. https://www.your-heart-health.com/content/close-the-gap/en-US/heart-disease-facts/young-athletes.html
It is a genetic heart defect which gave me my first symptoms as a teenager, but wasn't identified until my Welcome to Medicare physical. It can be dealt with medically, but without full assurance. Please be aware of it.
4
Thank you for your testimony - it made me rethink and better understand what happened to my father 32 years ago when he had his heart attack at age 50. I was 17 at the time and didn't really understand much of what was going on. What puzzled all of us after my dad came back from rehab was his complete change of personality: he had been such a quiet man and now he was erupting in fits of anger that proved to be very damaging on the whole family. He never believed in psychology and never sought help, and my mom and my siblings kept trying to figure things out as we went. And now I can understand what he must have gone through after his brush with death. My father is 82 today and doing well, but a part of him died 32 years ago and unfortunately, because he never said anything and never sought help, so did our whole family in some way.
It is fantastic that you had the courage to write so openly about your history. I hope that you talk to your daughter when she's a bit older to comprehend. Because my father was a doctor, we the kids got to sneak in into the ICU one at a time and see him. His eyes were wet and he made this strange noise when I came in. It took me years to realize in retrospect that he had been crying. He never talked about it, nor about anything. How helpless did this whole experience leave us, my siblings and me, for a very, very long time. So yes, talk, talk, talk, let it all out, always, which is what I do with my kids now.
21
Felt on my knees with chest pain... 2 days before I got a physical with a perfect bill of health: "you are remarquably healthy for a man your age. Heart looks excellent, we took acres steps since your father had a heart attach". So I thought it could only be gas... I got up sweating, got to the nearest Mart that was still open and got gasx a bottle water AND aspirin (since I'm here) and gobbled up every thing before reaching the cashier. A cashier who looked at me weird especially since I was sweating profusely and paying for open packages. 10 mn later felt better. Told myself: "see, it was gas"
Back home put on my jammies and I was debating on the side of the bed that horrible pain started again so painful that my eyes were tearing up. My wife got me in the car and we rushed to the hospital 10mn away. Once there they gave me a pill of nitroglycerin even before being checked in.
No trace in the EKG, no trace of Troponin (enzyme indicator of heart attack) in the blood.
Kept me overnight anyway and few hours later the blood test came back positive. Three stents and 16 years later filled with medications and reasonable amount of exercise I can tell the story.
A couple weeks later a 37 years old baseball player died in his sleep of a heart attack with the almost exact same blockage numbers I had. My luck was that it happened before I fell asleep.
20
This is an important message. Mr. Lee like millions of people ignored the early signs of heart failure because to give it attention would have been "inconvenient."
He was lucky to have survived the actual attack. Many are not so lucky.
Hindsight is always 20/20, but seeing a health practitioner for increasing chest pain is like putting a band-aid on a sucking chest wound: yes you're doing something about the problem but it is not nearly enough.
3
I observe wildlife. They live in the moment because there is so little time to linger and wonder why.
2
My wife's uncles and grandfather died before the age of 60, one at 44, from heart attacks related to smoking tobacco. If you are a smoker, quit. Please just quit.
1
Thank you for writing about your experience. I followed a healthy lifestyle and had been exercising regularly for more than 30 years. Nevertheless, about 2 years ago, I went into cardiac arrest at the gym in my wife's presence. (Who knew those warning signs on the machines there were for me!) Revived at the gym by gym staff using a defibrillator and overseen by nurses who were exercising at the same time; taken by EMS to Lenox Hill; one stent immediately emplaced; two more three days later. After cardiac rehab, I went back to the gym and have followed a strict diet. But each meal is a reminder. . . Thank you again and best wishes and a long life to you and to all who have had similar experiences. You are not alone.
11
I was 20 for my first heart-based trip to Emergency.
And the fear won’t ever go, but you press on regardless.
4
Thank you for this article, it was so thought provoking and sentimental at the same time. I am grateful you are still here as I am so grateful for the doctors who treated me 5 years ago.
It was a week after my 45th birthday and I was driving home from work when I had sudden crushing chest pain, pain down my left arm and up my neck to my jaw. I began sweating, shivering and throwing up. I had pulled over but went directly to the ER, where they found 100% blockage in my LAD. I had not had any prior symptoms besides fatigue; no high blood pressure, no high cholesterol although I was overweight. I became my immediate family's family history of heart disease.
Now almost 5 years later, I have lost 50lbs and have kept it off for a year plus. I feel like a completely different person. It will get better and the fear of recurrence will leave you, it has for me. I want to live too.
6
I was 66 when I experienced my Widow Maker. I was at the gym wrapping up my Sunday workout. All of a sudden nausea set in. I was light headed. I waited 15 minutes and then asked the staff to call me an ambulance. During the ambulance ride to Evanston Hospital I thought of my wife, Betsy Erkkila and my daughter Suli. I did not want to leave them but was grateful I had had them in my life. Waiting the 20 minutes for my doctor to arrive at the hospital seemed like forever. It turned out my physician was racing in his black Mustang from another hospital where he had just saved another persons life by inserting a stent. From my reporter days I had witnessed several surgical procedures. We talked as I watched on the x-ray machine that he was using to place my stent. Betsy arrived in my recovery room as Dr. David Koenigsberg said, "Congratulations. You just survived the Widow Maker. Your LAD was 90% blocked." I spent three days in the hospital. I was back teaching at Northwestern University in two weeks. I wrote thank you notes to Dr. Koenigsberg and the ambulance team who saved my life. Every health care professional I have spoken with said I am alive because I acted on my instincts and called for help almost immediately. One nurse asked me, "why did you wait 15 minutes?" I have had bouts of depression but I live more in the moment and cherish them. I appreciate every day. Betsy and I have been ballroom dancing for eight years. Right now we are working on a Bolero.
15
@Lawrence Stuelpnagel Cool story! Especially, the part where the physician “was racing in his black Mustang from another hospital”.
3
I am a cardiologist. Trying to specialize on prevention.
I see mental rehab is as important as physical rehab.
The biggest lesson here is the history of chest pain that was dismissed by the initial Dr.
That Dr must be feeling pretty bad right now.
My advice: plant-based diet, abdominal circumference measured 2 inches above highest point in hipbone needs to be less than 1/2 of your height (remember Tim Russert and what his personal DR stated here in NYT), and avoid artificial sweeteners and foods with high glycemic index. Also, LDL less than 70 mg/dL. I am assuming no smoking or excess alcohol.
The abdominal circumference advice should be for everybody...
7
My husband had a similar experience of being told he was not having a heart attack. My husband in his early eighties woke up on the morning we were leaving on vacation and said he wanted to go to the hospital because he was not feeling well.
We waited in the emergency room for what seemed like hours before the on-call weekend cardiologist told my husband he was not having a heart attack but would keep him overnight for observation. His blood work for the heart enzyme’s kept elevating but they did nothing.
I called a dear friend in NY and she told me to get him to a NY Hospital. I said I thought he was too sick to try. She told me the most important advice I have ever heard which is to “Be His Advocate”. I followed her advice and called the doctor at night and told him his heart enzyme was elevated. I arrived first light in the morning and called a heart surgeon friend, Dr. John Brown at Morristown Hospital. He got him out and within a short period of time after arriving at the hospital had 3 stents and one was to the major artery to his heart.
My husband has also lost 20 pounds, exercises, had a pacemaker/defib put in and follows his cardiologist’s regimen We moved back to New York City and he now goes to Mount Sinai Hospital for his check-ups.
Also think more should be discussed of the tests that can look inside the arteries and forewarn the doctor and patient of potential trouble.
Thank you so much for your article, it was a must reading for our family.
6
@Carole Bellidora Westfall Great story! But, I’m verklempt! You were not in New York! What god forsaken place we’re you?!
The pain of a heart attack is unique, overwhelming and unmistakable. Don't be bashful- call 911 immediately.
Definitely don't do what I did when I had my first one and drive yourself to the hospital.
5
This article is important and timely as the nation nears the start of "Heart Month", that occurs every February; a time to raise awareness of heart disease (HD).
So as an NP in cardiology, I'd like to reiterate important points:
-HD remains the leading cause of death in the US, although the trends are decreasing, soon it will match deaths from cancer.
-HD is largely preventable through a healthy diet, exercise and maintaining normal body weight. These are THE modifiable risk factors that need our daily attention.
-Identifying and controlling other conditions that put us at risk for HD are crucial: high blood pressure, diabetes, and elevated cholesterol. Seek screening and appropriate treatment.
-Drink alcohol in moderation (if at all), don't smoke or use street drugs.
-Understand your family history for HD- who, when, what and their outcome. Understanding the genetic/familial disposition is a growing field. Ask your family members so you can discuss this with your healthcare team.
-Reduce stress, get a good night's sleep.
-Discuss your risk of heart disease with your physician/NP/PA.
As this author had none of the risks, what we are left with is the message to recognize symptoms of a potential heart attack, even when we are young, or don't have risk factors: chest pain OR pressure/fullness with pain to the neck, back, jaw; lightheadedness, shortness of breath, nausea, cold sweats. These are known warning signs for seeking medical attention.
2
I recommend giving Dr. Esselstyn's book "Prevent & Reverse Heart Disease" a read (or watching some of his talks about the topic on youtube). Regardless of what you choose to do with the information in the end, I wish you and others who face this problem the best on a journey to recovery and fulfilling times with family.
6
Living with chronic reminders of death makes suicide a leading cause of death for physicians. And yes to Mr. Lee's link to children traumatized, surrounding by violence in inner cities.
From a 2018 NYTimes article (link below) - " 30 people were shot in a three-hour span between midnight and 3 a.m., an average of one every five minutes or so. Eight of the shootings during that period had three or more victims. Over the weekend, 14 children were shot and two, both 17, died. The youngest victim was 11 and the oldest was 62 "
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/08/06/us/chicago-weekend-shootings.html
1
I'm 70 and had a heart attack two months ago. Same story as many here: no obvious risk factors, good cholesterol, good blood pressure, eat meat in moderation, drink but moderately, have never smoked and I exercised two hours a day most days. In fact I experience my first symptoms half an hour after returning from an intense bike ride. My symptoms were were relatively mild, a slight chest pain more like heart burn and a more intense pain in the upper part of my right arm. I thought I'd pulled a muscle putting my bike on the rack but popped a couple aspirin on the off chance that it was something more serious. Then I proceeded to barbecue a salmon. When I became nauseous I told my wife about the symptoms and she fortunately insisted on driving me to the emergency room. My ECG looked normal but my blood test contained bio markers for heart muscle damage indicating an ongoing heart attack. They put me on blood thinners overnight and in the morning inserted a stent. Yes the blockage was building in the widow maker artery. Another of my arteries was and is still 50% blocked.
My first feeling after the stent was gratitude followed by guilt. Guilt that had cycled so intensely. When I arrived home I saw that my pulse had spike to 175, way to high given my age. I'm in cardiac rehab now and I recommend it highly. Mostly I feel grateful to know the exact to know the situation of my heart and to work with that going forward. Perhaps that's foolish optimism.
2
" The practitioner there did an electrocardiogram and said the left side of my heart was slightly enlarged, but my discomfort was probably just gas." 50% of errors related to missed diagnoses of acute coronary syndrome (threatened or actual heart attack) are attributed to gastrointestinal problems. Meanwhile, quality metrics continue to focus on clicking boxes, the electronic health record and seeing more patients. Can we imagine a health care delivery system where "Quality is Job One " and all leadership, resources, research and support will get us there?
3
Just like Mr Lee, I was a healthy 45 year old. Lost consciousness one night last year and ended up in the ER. The doc said you are having a heart attack and the next thing I knew I woke up after a double bypass. Due to complications I ended up staying on a heart/lung machine for over a week and in the ICU for a month. Miraculously, I made it out and have been in recovery. My takeaways from this experience are similar and the theme of PTSD is real. One additional thought is this, we believe we are invincible until we are NOT. For those who are lucky, the NOT happens over time and you can prepare. But for many of us the NOT happens instantly -- whether an acute health event, major car accident, etc. If you survive it's more than a new chapter, it's an entirely new book. And for me that's meant two things that I wasn't very good at pre-HA and I continue to work on post-HA: 1) live in the present and exhaust each moment 2) live mindfully with kindness, graciousness, and generosity.
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Trymaine Lee, you are lucky person to survive after a heart attack at 38 and thanks for sharing your story. Many don't make it. Last month a former Ph.D. student, Dr. Jha who I mentored during his doctoral studies years ago and was a research associate at Harvard Medical school, in his mid 40s when he passed away in Boston, MA alone in his apartment. He was alone in the wrong place at wrong time. After a massive heart attack if one does not get emergency medical attention when time is of the essence, the chance of surviving diminish with every passing moment.
With advances in modern medicine, heart attacks at younger age are preventable in multiple ways. Most importantly, get an annual physical exam at any age and have blood pressure (BP) checked, report any chest pains promptly, lipid profile and blood glucose checked. If there are abnormalities in values of any of these key diagnostic indicators then plan appropriate actions such as unblocking arteries and prevent heart attacks. Some are born with genetic predisposition and have family history of deaths at a young age due to heart failure and such person should have their DNA checked for polymorphisms that could contribute to those genetic predisposition and take advantage of the advances in modern day medicine.
What could have possibly done in the case of Dr. Jha that would have resulted in a different outcome than abrupt death? 1000s who prevent heart attacks with modern medical attention and managing killer high BP.
3
As a psychotherapist who works with survivors of cardiac events, one of the most challenging aspects is helping people overcome their fear and anxiety about having another event. Difficulty falling asleep, difficulty staying asleep, hypervigilance over any small physical discomfort, racing heart stoked by anxiety increasing fears, fears about taking an airplane flight and being unable to receive emergency care while in the air, etc. I would be interested in hearing from people who have figured out ways to manage such anxiety. I can be reached at hgreylcsw[at]gmail.com.
5
You can appreciate the trauma, stress and the emotions of the author if you have gone through the experience. But what amazes and more importantly worries me is that young people, the ages of our sons and daughters (yes daughter’s included as they are equally vulnerable in this high stress society), think they are invincible. When told to get regular medical checkups and regular blood work, they feel that we, the parents are nagging them and that nothing is going to happen to them. They go their merry way nonchalantly treating life like a game of poker hoping that nothing will happen and that they will win over life’s uncertainties. When annual medical checkups and blood work is free, protected by the Affordable Care Act, millennials leave money on the table, risking their lives and one day, god forbid, may end up on the surgical table.
3
Mr Lee thank you for sharing your story.Want to share mine to create more awareness among women.
I am a female Asian origin, 50 yrs, healthy active lifestyle, no known family history of heart disease at a younger age, normal bp & cholesterol, no diabetes, healthy weight, healthy diet etc. first visit to urgent care all tests normal, so diagnosed as indigestion. Second visit in 2 days, same but pulse rate 45 so sent to ER where angio was ordered, small blockage right ventricle. Lessons-
- Diagnostic numbers don't tell the whole story
- Symptoms for women very different from men often indigestion.
- Stress can cause a lot of damage to our health even if we think we are managing it ok, health stats ok.
- try something totally different after such an experience (in my case Transcendental meditation got me mentally over it faster, insist on cardiology rehab even if doc does not see need as it helped me build back confidence physically & mentally with support, let small things go, enjoy little moments, don't worry & think too far ahead, live in the moment)
- relook at diet even if healthy
- check breakout of cholesterol numbers even if total normal
- donate to medical R&D as tech is amazing
-call 911 when things feel off, do not wait, urgent care don't have specialists.
7
Another cause of heart disease is chemotherapy (sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0049384816301098), as I learned while trying to decide to start taking Social Security benefits sooner (a lower monthly amount) or later (a lower total amount if I live beyond 83).
I will start taking Social Security sooner.
I should have died from stage IV cancer, but I would not have left a spouse or young child--my kids are adults.
This is the significant difference between myself and Trymaine Lee.
I worry about living too long.
4
Mr Lee you are very lucky. At such a young age with good health you shouldn't have had such an experience. Misdiagnosis is common when you don't present with the classic symptoms of heartache and doctors still use "profiles" to assess patients . Even the ECG did not show anything. But it wouldn't because the event was waiting to happen. I had a heart attack at age 44. I did not have chest pain, pain in my left arm, etc. I felt unwell and was sweating. The paramedics took their time getting me to the hospital. I was given baby aspirin by the ER doctor who couldn't find anything wrong with me. After he left I had a moment when I suddenly felt really unwell, it passed through me. Internists came and they ran an ECG. It showed a heart attack had occurred. I believe I had it right when I felt so unwell a few minutes before. It changed my life. Had to make many lifestyle changes. Had to move from an old house we were living in (mould, dust). Other health issues developed a few years later.
All the best and take care.
3
This article highlights one of the things I argue with patient's about every day on the phone. The author is lucky to have made it to a place where he had a chance to be saved. He ran a real risk of dying right there in the car with his horrified wife and daughter watching. I'm so glad he ended up living to write this article but, for God's sake people, PLEASE call 911 for help. Yes, it can be expensive. In some states there is no charge for the evaluation, but there is if they transport you. Give you and your family a real chance that you will be around for that next birthday, anniversary, holiday. Your life is definitely worth it.
2
A clump of plaque stopped an artery from freely flowing blood to my leg. Angioplasty failed. Then, two “minor” clots appeared in my lungs. Doctors implied my arteriosclerosis was serious and real. Death soon became a friend. I read Philip Roth’s “Everyman,” Tolstoy’s “The Death of Ivan Illyich.” I watched Haneke’s “Amour.” I wanted to know what it was like to die. Now: I’ve clogged arteries but I will be alive when at long last I meet meet my long lost friend, Death, and die. It’s wonderful to see that I am alive, and will be alive, at the moment of my death. The clogged artery was a small success.
2
I too am a member of the club I did not want to be part of. Nearly six years ago, like you, with no other risk factors, while in the gym,...... experience the MI with a 100% blockage of the RAC. Thankfully, I was in on the table of a major hospital cath lab in about 50 minutes. Here is what I learned:
No amount of plaque in an artery is "safe." ( I had 20% in RAC)
Stress can kill anyone in the best of "health."
Give up eating animal meat. ( Some subset of people have a hormone response more dangerous than others,... in every risk profile group).
Drive down the bad cholesterol number as low as possible,... (Mine is now at 57)
Do your homework.
3
survivors of life threatening MI's come to grips with mortality because they have no choice. Mine was at age 50, I had a CABG the next day, and it failed, so I had another 7 months later. Double zipper. My lifestyle was not unhealthy, and it got healthier, but once a heart is damaged, there are consequences. Scar tissue causes arrythmias. Whatever process caused plaque formation continues, at least for the statin intolerant. When old age limits aerobic exercise, the heart suffers the most. I comfort myself by remembering that death by cardiac arrest is one of the quickest and least foreseeable ways to go. Since we all gotta go some time.
Do not allow the medical industrial complex to turn you into the gift that keeps on giving.
This NYT article from 2012 reported one example of widespread unscrupulous profiteering. Consider using your investigative journalism skills to find more instances of doctors using patients as cash cows.
https://www.nytimes.com/2012/08/07/business/hospital-chain-internal-reports-found-dubious-cardiac-work.html
" Hospital Chain Inquiry Cited Unnecessary Cardiac Work"
1
Wow. Thank you for eloquently sharing this experience. It helps me understand what my husband is going through as he recovers from a serious heart valve problem that would have killed him.
My brother and business partner passed at 54 years of age. Same thing , I was told... the widow maker!!!
His and his wife’s deadly error was ignoring the symptoms for days
Run to the emergency room if you think you’re having a heart attack.
Better alive and feeling foolish than the alternative!
3
You mentioned that you had none of the usual risk factors for heart attack. What about sleep deprivation? Memento mori.
I'm glad that you didn't die; wishing you a long, healthy, and happy life.
2
For Mr Lee and everyone else reporting "normal blood pressure" and "normal (or 'low') cholesterol", living in the NYC area: there is a 100% pant based cardiac rehab program at Montefiore Medical Center. For those living elsewhere: there are health care providers, clinics, books and on-line programs from which you can learn about prevention and treatment of coronary artery disease with a low fat, whole foods, plant-based diet. (The best single book: Caldwell Esselstyn, Jr's Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease.) The Framingham Heart Study showed that to be heart attack proof, we must have a blood cholesterol under 150. Our American "normal range" for cholesterol is very broken: most Americans who have a heart attack have a "normal" cholesterol, ie under 200. But virtually none of them and maybe in fact none have a cholesterol level under 150. Many cardiac patients with "genetic high cholesterol" who adopted healthy vegan diets have achieved this, without medication. Similarly, the ideal blood pressure is about 110/65, and unless that's about your level (off BP drugs), your system is showing stresses that can be remedied with diet changes. These cholesterol and BP values are key barometers for cardiac health. Even those who feel "doomed" by family history: almost none of you are doomed, except by old habits.
3
@Votna Lets drill down on this a little ... there is accumulating evidence that one's LDL (read "bad cholesterol") can't be too low. The previous recommendation of LDL < 100, has been lowered to LDL < 80, but it looks like plaque regression happens at LDL < 60. Trymaine was told his cholesterol was normal ... that depends on how you define "normal". How do you make use of this? Drive your LDL below 60 using statins and diet. Of course monitor BP, and all the rest. We all seem to need a number - now we've got one.
1
Another piece that, apart from satisfying one's curiosity about being struck down suddenly by the fickle finger of fate, does not advance anything of interest for the general reader. A heart attack at a young age is an unpleasant surprise, living through it is better. Duh.
2
We need to ask ourselves this critical question, why are so many Americans getting heart attacks? For decades, the medical community misattributed heart attacks to high cholesterol and dietary habits of consuming cholesterol and saturated fat. Hence, we got diets rich in carbs to replace that. They have been and are still now too slow in recognizing this error and attributing it correctly to the overconsumption of refined carbohydrates particularly sugar. This may not be the cause in everyone, but it's likely the prime driver. It's also behind diabetes and obesity.
What can be done immediately to stop a future heart attack? Get your CRP tested. High levels should be followed up on. See https://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/c-reactive-protein-test-to-screen-for-heart-disease.
1
what?! you had constant chest pressure for days and when you decided to do something about it you went to a "clinic"? This is emblematic of everything that is wrong with our for-profit healthcare system. You were foolish to wait (apologize to your family for acting like a fool) and if you did not sue the for-profit "clinic" for malpractice - then you are irresponsible (and apologize to society for not holding the for-profit, sham healthcare facility accountable.
2
20 years into my heart journey which started at the age of 30. My heart attack was not nearly as dramatic as Trymaine’s and only because I already had heart issues did I got to the ER.
Mine began 3pm at work..a skip of a beat the first few minutes followed by a hot cold sensation in my chest. The best feeling you get when you are doing cardio and it peaks...almost painful but not. 45 mins later I got a ride to the ER.
Mistakes I made: Call 911, this is the fastest way to be seen in an ER and can literally save your life.
Don’t think just because you don’t have excruciating pain or sensation down your arm that you aren’t having a heart attack. Mine was quiet & subtle.
Trust your instincts and insist on getting the correct diagnosis. You know your body better than anyone else...if something doesn’t feel right, it’s not. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.
Just because your young doesn’t mean you are invincible. I went to the doctor multiple times the year before my initial diagnosis. I was 30 but looked much younger and that prolonged my diagnosis. Even thought the doctor had my family history (Dad’s first heart attack was at 42 and dead by 50) he never suggested I have any testing and I didn’t think to have it. Why would I? I was young and female not the face of heart disease. His mistake and my compliance almost cost me my life. Be assertive. Again, if you don’t think something’s right, it’s not. Take control of your body.
7
it is unclear to me why more Docs don't order coronary CT calcium scans. They are among the cheapest of clinical tests and would have revealed this heart attack-in-waiting, right? Why not? only a few hundred bucks (less than a colonoscopy)? start at 35 yo, and work out a predictive schedule using data.
1
@A J. Because it doesn't change what you do, at the cost of $, unnecessary work up of false positives and radiation exposure. If the decision tree doesn't fork you don't need more data . ETT and risk reduction change outcome, CT no.
3
I had my heart attack at age 62 four years ago. I initially disregarded the chest pain and only acted when my little Shi Zhu started to get upset. I drove myself to a nearby hospital and walked into the emergency room. I was having a major heart attack that required a helicopter ride to another hospital for a stent procedure. But for my little dog I would be dead. I remember reflecting in the ICU on President Truman’s observation “If you want a friend in Washington get a dog.”
5
Why is it taking so long for people to realize that switching to a plant-based diet will not only prevent heart disease but also reverse it, along with preventing many types of cancers? Meat and dairy are killers. All the science is there. Start by going to nutritionfacts.org to learn more. It’s a non-profit whose only goal is getting people healthy.
5
I don’t want to sound preachy but changing to a whole food plant based diet has been proven to reduce heart disease as well as other health problems. Anything is better than suffering from these often reversible health problems.
Watch “Forks over Knives” and “What the Health” which help to explain the benefits. The Forks over Knives website shows how to eat a healthy and delicious plant based diet. It does take awhile to learn a new way of eating.
It has improved my health tremendously and I feel so much better and I know you will too.
8
Welcome to the club. I have four stents and had numerous trips to the cath lab-entry via leg not wrist. Had heart attack the day before Thanksgiving-
Heart disease is a silent killer. I was 59 when they put in two stents the day after Thanksgiving. I was back in ER left to die with a prognosis of probable death on Easter Sunday - one of the two stents put in on Thanksgiving was blocked. they opened it- In May of the same year, they had to put in two more stents. That was nine years ago. I have been fine since. I too was not obese, exercised regularly, was a non-smoker for years and as all my doctors told me- I did not even look sick. It is very common for doctors and ER staff to tell a patient who walks into the ER that they are ok and having a bout of indigestion. Then they leave and have a heart attack in the parking lot ten minutes later or go home and end up calling 911 and heading back to the ER again before they head for the cath lab. Sad to say, old news but good luck as a survivor!
2
Please get tested for your Lipoprotein(a) level. This seems to be responsible for most heart attacks in young (less than 60 or so) people. It is genetically determined. Pharmaceutical companies are searching for ways to lower the level and may be very near finding one.
On my 73rd birthday, July 21, 2018 I was in a car going to JFK for a vacation flight to New Mexico to see family. As we proceeded from Rockland County down the Palisades Parkway and across the GW I was feeling great pain in both arms and my chest--as if a giant was squeezing me; being arrogant I was sure it was indigestion but my wife Joan, after 20 minutes of urging, convinced me that we should exit the Triborough/ RFK Bridge, cross over Randalls Island and go to the Mt. Sinai Hospital ER which I walked into. Who would think?--LAD 100% blockage heart attack. Stent. Now doing fine. But how do I thank the hospital team of no less than 12 individuals--from surgeons to stretcher pushers( better said, "rushers") who were there for on that wonderfully sunny Saturday afternoon helping me and so many others. Now is my chance--thank you .
195
@James Riley You are a lucky man James. You were at the right place at the right time getting expert medical attention at one of the world class hospital. You story should be a lesson to many to seek medical help after great chest pain and pain in arms.
21
Note that he saw a practitioner before the heart attack. Practitioners absolutely have a place in medical care but when it comes to stuff like this you need appropriate medical background.
Colds and flu yes. Chest pain no.
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@C Rizzo
Rizzo, note, first, that he says "practitioner" which could refer to any number of professionals, including physicians. Second, you can find many, many anecdotes with the same theme, but featuring the individual's personal physician or an ER doc. I think you have an axe to grind and are doing so based on a faulty premise.
10
@WPRPhD
I trained as a PA before med school. I believe and support midlevels, like no other, but they are often misused and put in places they don't belong by a meretricious ill advised system that sees economy as short term savings not best outcome.
20
@C Rizzo My mother saw her physician 2 days before she died of a heart attack. They don’t have x-ray vision unfortunately.
10
My husband's father died of a heart attack at 43. His son, my husband-to-be in another 15 years, was 14 years old. He calls it the watershed event of his life. My own dad passed away at 47. While we didn't lose our dads to outside violence, we lost them to their bodies breaking down. Every time I see a young person smoking with a small child by their side, I want to stop and tell them to quit, now. Your kids need you. You need to stay alive for them.
I wish you a long, long life, and plenty of time to tell your kids you love them.
137
@JanTG I feel even angrier that smokers with children are forcing their kids to breathe second-hand smoke. The adults make a choice to commit suicide one drag at a time; the children don't. Sometimes I wish those parents could be charged with a crime.
6
I'm on the other side. The parent who lost a son. He was 36. He had been laid off from his job. He had a severe headache. Didn't go to the emergency room because he had no health insurance. Hoped the pain would just go away. Died as a result of a brain hemorrhage. People die in this country as a result of having no health insurance. They put off going to seek help until it is too late. It is all well and good to tell people about the signs of a heart attack or stroke, but little good that does when people are afraid to go to get medical help because they are afraid of the overwhelming cost.
37
@underwater44, this should be a pick.
7
Thanks for writing this. Like so many I have atrial fib but no symptoms. I try to keep in excellent shape at 63, and exercise hard every day..400-500 calories. Even play 55+ basketball 3x a week as I just was forced into retirement at 63. At church on Sunday I think of all my peers who have died (only a couple of friends mothers left..no fathers) and am almost at 100, 7 grammar school, 20 high school, 10 college, 30 co workers, 12 basketball, 6 tennis, 12 fellow parents and on and on. I am here and they are not but I KNOW I will be there soon. I have a bad habit (most people hate it, some like it) of playing events backward (like Bird-Magic college game, Helicopter crash in Iran with President Carter) that seem recent and say "that was 40 years ago..we don't have anywhere near that much time left". Carpe diem and don't waste your life. Call your friends, love your family, skip the donut or pizza but eventually it will come.
1
Mr. Lee writes "I eat better, exercise regularly and am down more than 20 pounds."
Was high BMI a major factor in Mr. Lee's heart attack? What other risk factors did he have?
@Paul, a big one: he was a soft-bodied mammal with complex parts in a rough-edged world, where we can go down from genetic causes, accidents, violence, or in other ways. Yes, be healthy, but no list of risk factors, or vegan diet, or queries about sick people's habits or 700 Club donations can give you guarantees.
2
first, I'm glad you survived. I too have an LAD problem. but there is one absolutely foolproof, easy, cheap ($100) tho not covered by insurance thing to have done.
go find out your coronary calcium score. period. no ifs and or buts. and if your Dr or the quack you saw the day before says ANYTHING but go, go now, find yourself another Dr.
EVERYONE and ANYONE with a family history, who's obese (esp pre-diabetic -that's literally 50% now in US) or who has inflammatory conditions from MS to IBD etc should absolutely have one. like next week.
while it couldnt have prevented what you have, and thats excessive arterial plaque in the LAD *in conjunction with* a poor diet, lack of exercise, family history etc, at least you would have known its there and known the risk.
but there's fat money in cardiac rehab clinics, dedicated hospital wings etc. as someone said (paraphrasing), making someone understand something that affects their paycheck is very difficult. a shame how greed trumps morals in medicine. just take this drug for rest of YOUR life while my kid goes to college.
so do this;
1. have a coronary calcium scan NOW.
2. lose weight by any means possible. even a 5% reduction makes a huge difference.
3. reduce inflammation. its the required 2nd half to LAD that caused his issue. that means ZERO sugar poison esp HFCS, NO processed foods and getting your insulin score low as possible. this is all about controlling inflammation!
4. walk a liitle and enjoy it.
5. sleep more. easy.
2
I’m glad you’ve been given a second chance. I’m concerned about the statement “I eat better...”. Read Esselstyn’s book, Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease. This eating better isn’t about eating more chicken and broccoli. A plant based diet is in order. Please read as much as you can about diet changes that will prevent plaque from forming in your arteries.
4
Every day is a gift, so treat it as one. Try to make the most of it and enjoy it to the fullest.
It sounds so obvious, I know; even inane. Yet how many of us fall into the trap of consciously elevating all the little insults that others give us to such importance, all those absurd mundane little nothing-burgers that spoil each and every day?
So enjoy the moment. You might not get another.
1
Excellent article, thank you for your insights, this was very well written.
3
You need to see a psychologist. I did after my heart attack. It helps a lot. You need to talk it out. Best thing that I have ever done.
1
Glad you are well now.
Here how to live a long time:
-Eat oatmeal every day
-Take aspirin, fish oil, red reishi, saw palmetto and rhodiola every day
-spray shower with eucalyptus oil
-HIIT, one min per day
-don't smoke, maybe a little alcohol
-don't retire
-have frequent sex
Good luck( from an MD)
1
Thank you very much for sharing, it really made me appreciate a lot more what God has giving me!!
It's all about diet. We have so much more control over this than doctors would have us believe. Stay away from fast foods and junks foods, eat plenty of dark colored veggies, plenty of fruits and whole grains and stay as much away from meat as you can -- and you will outlive your doctors!
2
@Lisa M
It's all about a rich, diverse, whole plant foods diet without added oil/fat. Aim for a BP of 110/65 and total cholesterol, under 150, both achieved with diet alone, and that means you are on the heart healthy track. You can be in a car accident or be gunned down but it won't be a heart attack that kills you.
"Widow Maker" -- but also widower (and orphan) maker. Women with heart attacks often have atypical symptoms. See:
https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/heart-attack/warning-signs-of-a-heart-attack/heart-attack-symptoms-in-women
4
In 2014 I returned briefly from my new home, a "bicoque,(shack)" on the Middle River with "mah honeys" to Manhattan, and checked in with a Dr. Goms, cardiologist at Mount Sinai. He took one look at my chart, saw that my heartbeat was alarmingly slow compared to previous years, scheduled me for a pacemaker the following Monday--this was on a Friday-- and after an overnight in the recovery ward was released the next day and have been and felt fine, "que le Bon Dieu soit loue,"ever since. So, I owe my life to that doctor's quick thinking and willingness to act almost "sur le champ!"Goms, by the way, I was informed, perfected the pacemaker. So, as Otis Poindexter, fellow staff officer on the old SS Atlantic of American Isbrantsen Lines, long since dissolved through bankruptcy, would always say, the next moment is never promised you. Good luck to the author.
On 3/1/92, while jogging the most difficult 2 miles of my life at a local Y, I suffered a MI (myocardial infarction). I was 44 and because of family history, had seen a cardiologist a year before and got a clean bill of health. No pain, but my heart was pounding like a drum and I was sweating like a pig. I showered, and drove myself to my FP’s office who immediately diagnosed the problem. Next thing , I’m in an ambulance with a police escort. Like you, I exercised, was a non-smoker, but was 20 lbs overweight. After having stents installed twice with poor results, I was a shadow of myself, never feeling good, and not expecting to be here today. Angina upon exertion, no energy. Living/working just to create an estate for wife and kids. After 12 years of “purgatory”, on 1/27/04, Dr. Mehmet Oz (before he was a TV star)cracked me open and gave me a new lease on life. I dropped 25 lbs, improved my diet and, after retiring in ‘11, became a personal trainer. Today, I jog, take spin classes, and lift weights six days a week. Not a day goes by that I don’t remember every minute of that day almost 27 years ago when I almost died. As I get ready to go to the Y for a spin class, I see the faint scar on my chest and remember the words of Dr. Oz, “I can fix your heart, but the rest is up to you.”
2
Trymaine, this is truly written from the heart; revealing, brave and inspiring. But scary.I'm sure this awful experience makes you an even better journalist and writer. I feel for your wife and daughter too. And good luck in the half-marathon!
2
Please stop saying that to your daughter. She already is special and deserves to live an average life in which she feels her father love(s/d) her unconditionally whether or not she lives up to his narcissistic grandiose last words about doing something “special.” I’m glad you’re feeling better and achieving impressive goals.
4
My husband suffered a heart attack 2 1/2 years ago, a healthy 50 year old man. I came home to find him shivering on the living room couch and acting erratically. He refused to allow me to call an ambulance, insisting that he had some kind of “flu or something.” He waited two days before seeing his PCP who informed him he’d had a heart attack - thank God, not a widow-maker. They performed angioplasty, and he now has two stents and is healthy - for all intents and purposes.
I tell this story because even two years plus on, I beat myself us that I didn’t use better judgment and call an ambulance when I knew something was clearly wrong. I love my husband and didn’t want to anger him, but in future, I’ll take an angry husband over a dead one. He’ll just have to be upset with me and get over it.
219
@Sherry
Why men hesitate or refuse to call emergency medical help when they are in serious distress is beyond me. In my late teens I had three attacks of appendicitis over the space of a year, the last one waking me from a sound sleep. I was taken to the hospital for an emergency appendectomy. I tried to tough it out. A thirty minute surgical procedure probably saved me from peritonitis or death.
Four years ago at age 71 I experienced a coronary artery blockage but took an aspirin and called 911, complaining about the elephant's foot pressing on my chest. In just a few minutes a crew was at my house helping me and transporting me to the hospital where a coronary blockage was shown on a scan. Bypass surgery saved the day and my life. The surgeon said taking the aspirin was the right thing to do.
18
@Sherry "I'll take an angry husband over a dead one...and get over it." What a great line!
25
My understanding is that the UK National Health Service has a large number of publicly available defibrillators, in a vast network of stores, restaurants, gas stations and office buildings etc. Because of this the UK has a much lower rate of death from heart attack, whereas in the US it takes an ambulance or a visit to a hospital to revive someone from cardiac arrest and a near death experience.
Entrepreneurs have placed scooters in public locations in recent years in profitable businesses. Maybe someone should consider doing something similar with defibrillators.
It would seem that insurance companies would be in favor of this and pay for its usage, as it would not only reduce cardiac arrest deaths enormously, as has happened in the UK. Additionally, it would also dramatically reduce the lifelong debilitating complications that occur in many of those that survive that may include severe brain injury and other vital organ damage.
1
After suffering the same "widow-maker" attack over two years ago at age 69. My symptoms and treatment were identical to Mr. Lee's. my description of the pain, "like a corkscrew to my heart" apologies to Dylan.
My advice would be the same as Warren Zevon's "Enjoy every sandwich" but hold the mayo.
96
@Rick Spanier Is Miracle Whip OK?
2
Mr. Lee, thank you for sharing your personal story so poignantly and I am deeply sorry for what you and your family have endured. I think the message about post-MI PTSD is a very important one. Tending to your recovering spiritual self after a near-death experience is as important as cardiac rehab, and your conveyed this beautifully.
It occurred to me also, in your astute descriptions of your wife's reaction to your comment, e.g. about where you want to be buried, that she has PTSD, too, having witnessed your near-death on more than one occasion. Just as with those in Chicago who you chronicled have PTSD after witnessing violent crime, one's family members are dealing with the same emotions. Best wishes to you and thank you for your gifted writings.
4
My first coronary arrest was at 44. No smoking, obesity, or any of the usual factors.
I have Brugada Syndrome, a fatal arrhythmia of the ventricles.
That first arrest happened while I was driving to the doctor; I hadn’t been feeling well.
I crashed into an underpass, and the jolt restarted my heart! I don’t know if it was a death experience, but I was keenly aware of being in my grave, being warm and totally at peace. That gives me comfort 18 years later.
Over the years, I’ve had three ICDs implanted.
It hasn’t made me a better person. Or any worse, for that matter. I try not to obsess about it, and I don’t worry if my next breath is my last.
My mother will be 90 soon. I always tell her to enjoy it because I certainly won’t be blowing out 90 candles!
5
First, Mr. Lee, thank you for sharing your experience - you've probably saved a life or two today, and I'm very glad you're still with us.
I do not have a similar story but I wish to draw attention to the fact that so many of us, presenting with physical symptoms indicating something seriously wrong, would hesitate to call for help. Why? Because they have no health insurance. They know that treatment such as that you received would or could cost them and/or their family everything. Many, would likely rather sacrifice themselves than the well being of their loved ones.
Just this month, I became eligible for Medicare. I have not seen a doctor in 12 yrs. - so far I've been lucky. But I've lived with the fear of an event such as yours, a car accident or some other calamity necessitating others to make that decision for me.
Save my life only to be financially devastated or let me go and at least leave my family whole? That's a choice many will face. In a country touted to be the wealthiest in the world, our citizens should not have to choose between death or destitution.
29
My sister died of a massive heart attack at 64. The week before she went to an urgent care center because of chest pressure the night before. She only had an EKG done which they said was normal and discharged her. Had she gone to an ER she would most likely been given a test called troponin which would probably have been positive and would have immediately resulted in a further cardiac work up. Perhaps the fatal heart attack could have been avoided. My message: go to an ER for chest pain/pressure.
14
Nothing here about prevention or treatment. I'd like to know that you're now moving towards a full out plant based diet. I'd like readers to know that diet and exercise, also called Lifestyle Change, is almost always preventative against coronary artery disease. All you have to do is eat more veggies, fruit, whole grains and legumes. Stop eating dairy (including cheese), meat, poultry, and most fish.
Try it for one month and you'll be hooked. One month is a short time to learn how to live longer and live better.
8
As a registered nurse who has cared for patients with recent heart attacks, and PTSD, amongst many other diagnoses in the past thirty years I admire anyone who is brave enough to share their experience with others, especially in a well written form. It was the first sentence of the second paragraph on page four though that really grabbed me: “I was a mostly healthy former high school and college athlete.” That is code, I thought, for overweight.
It was only at the end of the article that Mr. Lee states that he was down twenty pounds. This is admirable, but still euphemism for not having lost all the weight. All of us struggle with overindulgence in some way. This essay, though, approaches the heart attack as if it was completely random. If he had been hurt by the flying glass of a meteor and no one was recognizing the fear involved of suffering another meteor event I would be more sympathetic. As it is, I think I am not alone as a health care provider in feeling as if another patient treated life as not quite as precious as they should have until the effects of their behavior shocked them into change.
Do not become numb. And do not forget that fear when you have a choice between a walk in the woods and a day at a street fair filled with fatty foods and sugar.
9
@Cary Zigrossi
My thoughts exactly. The article led me to believe he was diagnosed with some rare heart disorder that strikes even healthy people who are not overweight. It was only in the end that I realized that it's not some random occurrence of a cruel medical misfortune but the usual consequence of stress, dietary choices and lack of regular cardiovascular activity. I'm glad the writer has taken up meditation and running.
3
The illustration is amazing. Kudos to the artist, Eiko Ojala.
19
your story mimics my life. My husband ran marathons, no smoking, normal cholesterol, thin, athletic and at 42 had a clot on his left anterior descending artery. our kids were, 3-7-10. That was in 1987 when angioplasty was just beginning. He coded in the emergency room. He survived, we got back to a normal life, he stopped running though. Now he's 72, still lean and fit, playing golf and had triple bypass at 70. I know if we lived in a different era, I would be a widow. I think he appreciates the little stuff in life now. He doesn't do yoga, now he's retired and does UBER and loves going out to meet lots of different people and have great conversations while he drives. Simple pleasures. Thanks for your thoughts.
Women should know , however, that the first time Coronary artery is recognized , is when they land in the ER with an MI. Unlike men, we present very differently, so I hope women out there reading your wonderful essay will take heed. I am a Nurse Practitioner in Primary care and caution all my patients about this sneaky issue with women. take care my friend.
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@Geraldine Marrocco
This sounds like important information for women. Can you please translate into English for a non medical person? What do you mean by "Coronary artery" and by MI?
@Geraldine Marrocco Hi, Geraldine..... please give more specific advice for women. I didn’t understand what you were referring to, in your statement.....”the first time Coronary artery is recognized..... in the ER with an MI...... Please tell us more! Thank you. I know you have great experience as a nurse practitioner that will benefit us all.
1
I am a woman who had her first stenting at age 61. For six months earlier I had been seeing my PCP regarding shortness of breath, exhaustion, lower back pain and more. I had a stress tests, echocardiogram, and more, however it wasn’t until I went to a doc specializing in women’s heart disease that I was sent for a catheterization and a 60% blockage was found and stented. She told me later that the test results calibrated earlier were based on research conducted on men and that women’s results can significantly differ.
I was lucky and hope this info can benefit other women whose test results keep coming back “normal”.
5
To the writer, thank you for writing about the anxiety you are left with. Since you are a journalist, I hope you continue explore how to manage this and share what you learn as you learn it. My daughter is one of many kids diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes by something that sent her to the hospital. Three years later, she struggles with anxiety about her health, as do her parents. Our reactions are quite common in the T1D community. I would love to learn more about how to help my daughter cope, and how to better cope myself. Best of luck to you, and I will continue to follow your story and your work.
4
I had exactly the same experience at 43. But that was in 1992, and emergency angioplasty was not available. The damage to my heart was permanent. I had several more angioplasties (without stents), a second mild heart attack, and eventually had bypass surgery in 2013. Since then, I've ridden 6,000 miles on my bicycle. I competed in a 50 mile gravel bike race in 2017, despite a damaged heart. I remember thinking my life was over at 43, but I accomplished more in my career and lived a fuller life after the event than I had before. At age 70, I recently retired and feel strong and healthy and ready to find out what is next in my life!
17
It’s a good story to tell and to be heard. But a teaching moment may be being missed - most patients who are younger than 40 who have a myocardial infarction have significantly elevated cholesterol with a heritable, genetic component. Readers with family members who have had heart attacks at young ages should be screened for so called familial hypercholesterolemia. Surviving a heart attack is a wonderful example of our advances in medical science but avoiding one is even better.
6
The author stated his cholesterol was normal
1
Me, too. Six months ago.
Almost to the letter, except for the chest pains right before it happened.
That, and I was substantially older—68.
Meditating does help. As does psychotherapy.
One factor contributing to its being such a traumatic event is our death-phobic society; here, in North America especially, see death and dying as the enemy, and believe that our purpose, our job, is to fight it. It wins, which means, because of the way we hold it, we lose.
There are other, less frightening, more useful ways to go through life. It’s important to start early. For more about this, I recommend the book, Die Wise, by Stephen Jenkinson, a long-time palliative care specialist.
Stephen offers the point that, contrary to conventional wisdom, everybody does NOT know that he or she is going to die; all most of us really know, until cancer or a heart attack or some other executioner comes knocking, is that everybody ELSE is going to die.
7
Six years ago, at the age of 50, I was an elliptical when I felt a severe blow to by chest. I had to get down and sit down. I had a subsequent stress test which I failed.
They told me I did not have a heart attack but should get an angiography. I was five minutes away from getting wheeled into the cath lab when my wife happened to be talking to the nurse. The nurse said that it is the time for a stent. Even before the angiography!
I declined the procedure and proceeded to research the topic online. I came across Dr Esselstyn and Dr Dean Ornish and Dr McDougall. I also read 1000s of reviews of these doctors' books on Amazon. I realized I had stable angina and needed to change my life style instead of getting procedures.
I adopted a whole food plants only diet with no added oil. I started walking every day. I lost 30 lbs and have kept about 15 lbs off long term.
Six years on, I don't have angina. Recently climbed big mountains in the Zion/Banff national park and my labs are excellent. I do take a small dose of a statin.
I would encourage you, as some others have here, to adopt a whole plants only diet. You survived the heart attack but going forward, you need to be extra careful.
Thanks for sharing the great story.
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@reverseheartDisease
I'm glad it worked for you, but it was incredibly difficult for me to follow Ornish's diet, and I have tried many times. I had a TIA almost a year ago and since then I've tried to cut out some of the major problem foods and ingredients (I have high blood pressure): salts, fried foods, fast food, caffeine, sugar, etc.
Cutting out sugar except for natural fruit was key and I lost 10 pounds. However, one needs to be ever-vigilant to not lose will power in this food saturated society. Restaurant food is not your friend, which makes extended travel problematic for me.
I am glad not to have any lasting effects from the TIA; it was certainly a wake-up call and was a great motivator to make some changes in my life.
2
@reverseheartDisease
You are 100% correct! I took my Mom to the McDougall clinic in Santa Rosa about 25 years ago. We changed to a whole food plant based diet and helped her rheumatoid arthritis tremendously. She also lost about 40 pounds over about 8 months. She felt so well that she enjoyed cooking once again. I would get home from work she would have delicious plant based meals made - such as lasagna, stews, etc.
For people who are learning about changing to a plant based diet I recommend drmcdougall.com and forksoverknives.com.
I also just listened to “The China Study” on Audible.com which shows scientifically that this way of eating is essential - for us, for the animals, and for the environment.
Best wishes to everyone in good health
3
"I was a mostly healthy former high school and college athlete."
The key word is "former".
Nearly 11 years ago my high school friend, Brad, died of a heart attack, leaving behind a wife and young child. He was 48 years old.
Brad ran cross-country in the fall, whereas I played football. We both ran track and field in the spring.
After graduation, Brad gradually settled into a three decades long lifestyle of "former" athlete. His weight ballooned over the years. He had stopped running.
Jim Fixx, author of The Complete Book of Running, popularized the sport of running for its health benefits. Regrettably, he died of a heart attack while jogging at the age of 52.
Unlike Brad, I continued to run throughout my life, completing my 30th marathon last fall.
Some people still mention to me what Fixx was doing when he died. But Fixx was obese and a heavy smoker when he started running at 36. Through running, he lost weight and quit smoking. By doing so, he outlived his own father, who died of a heart attack at 43.
Vigorous exertion can increase the incidence of acute cardiac events in individuals who do not exercise regularly, but habitual physical activity reduces the overall risk of heart attacks and sudden cardiac death by preventing development of heart disease or its progression.
You can spend your life living as healthy as you can until the day you die. Or you can spend your days worrying about dying. Never too late to start making healthy lifestyle changes.
3
As long as insurance companies are in the driver’s seat, a heart attack will remain the single largest symptom of CAD. There are effective predictors which, if used to err on the side of caution, will get a cardiologist in deep trouble. Yes there may be more money spent that way, but the current system spends human lives. Which do we value more?
5
To the writer: Congratulations on your survival and may you lead a long and prosperous life. I haven't read through all the comments here but feel the need to mention two adjuncts to psychotherapy which have lately garnered high praise foruse in the healing of Post Traumatic Stress: EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and psychedelic therapy (in particular, psilocybin and MDMA). Suffering of trauma from near-death experiences, experiences in war, from sexual molestation, need not last a lifetime.
7
A beautifully written piece full of wisdom and insights into the frailty of life. Those of us who have survived a life-threatening heart condition know that our precious life hangs by a thread. If we are lucky and had the good fortune of being saved by a gifted cardiologist, we continue life as changed people - more human, more humble, more understanding and forgiving. Funny how having a close shave with death may turn us into a real mensch.
2
Consider the situation in which the same trauma is felt 24/7, regardless of the fact that nothing is really wrong health-wise. In lieu of symptoms, the mind generates its own; those symptoms become as real as the effects of an actual disease.
"But you're not really dying. It's all in your mind." We get those kinds of responses constantly. It's our fault for being unable to rationalize the trauma as being generated by the mind - even when we recite "it's psychosomatic" to ourselves, over and over.
And it is trauma, as real as the symptoms created by the mind.
It's important for us to say, endlessly, that "I might not be dying."
I haven't died yet. I have tomorrow, I hope. I want to live.
1
I was diagnosed with PTSD many years ago, and not long after I was diagnosed I noticed that I was meeting a lot of people with PTSD - too many people. I wanted my pain to be special, to have a story. I do have a story, but I have met many other people with similar feelings since my diagnosis, and I have come to believe that Life is a traumatic "happening". Life doesn't leave many people unscathed, and because a very large percentage of people are traumatized, the drama and the power of traumatic events becomes common and loses power. I have arrived at this perception and have come to believe that part of the Job-of-Living is carrying a burden. Too many people market themselves as doing really well in all facets of Life. This is boring and contains no real Art. Glimpses of genuine peace occur only after an individual's consciousness recognizes that traumatic pain does not leave and there is no cure for it. Good luck to you All:)
7
Thank you, Mr. Lee, for sharing your experiences. I cried reading it. Although I'm a bit older than you, now 60, it felt all too premature when death came knocking at my door on June 5, 2018, when I suffered a heart attack via a 98 % blockage of the widow(er) maker cardiac artery. I too thought of myself as healthy, a regular exerciser, and someone who went to the doctor regularly. Why did this happen to me, I asked, and not to any of my much less healthy and more overweight friends? I was fortunate to live near a major emergency room in Manhattan and being a doctor, to tell my husband to call 911 when I started experiencing extreme chest pain early one morning. I, too, felt giddy during the cardiac stent (must have been the meds), but cried for days afterwards. I have also experienced both the denial that it all happened to me, while embracing a much healthier diet and an intense exercise regimen. I now get lots of compliments regarding how I look. Do I tell those admirers what prompted my transformation? I still find myself touching, tapping, and massaging my chest to make sure everything is OK there. I worry when I have a syncopal episode (from my medications). I, too, am part of an ever enlarging group of heart attack survivors, and count my blessings. I also want to spread the word to all my friends that this could happen to anyone, and to tell people to take care of their health and not to ignore the warning signs. Be well, everyone.
10
It's sad to see so many people resigned to dying from a heart attack, when it is within their power to reduce their risk to zero. There is a mountain of research indicating that heart attacks are caused by high cholesterol levels, and that high cholesterol levels are caused by dietary intake of cholesterol. If you reduce your total cholesterol level to below 150 mg/dL, your risk of heart disease becomes virtually nil. You can reduce your cholesterol to this safe level by adopting a whole-foods, plant-based diet.
In fact, by reducing your total cholesterol to below 150 mg/dL, you will be drastically reducing your risk of not only heart disease but also Alzheimer's disease and breast cancer. Don't fall prey to the propaganda perpetuated by the meat, dairy, and egg industries. Look at the research. You can save yourself and your loved ones enormous pain and suffering.
6
@H.G. Dietary cholesterol plays a role but is not at all the sole determinator of your cardiovascular risk.
Perhaps some more research without making statements like that?
3
@H.G. no its not about cholesterol. stop. stop now. your body makes 8x-10x more cholesterol DAILY as you can eat. cholesterol is absolutely 100% required for you to live. reducing it if over say 200-250 total is helpful but it prevents nothing. zero.
in the writers case its inflammation of the lining in his heart artery (LAD) allowing plaque to deposit on the surface (worst) or under the top layer (little better) in a place where a blockage results in quick death of heart muscle when it breaks off and creates essentially a logjam. the plaque is your body trying to repair (bandaid) the damage to the lining caused by a inflammation from small number of things. and while the repair cells are carried there by cholesterol (as well as removed, thats HDL) reducing cholesterol is just reducing the number of boats. its still gonna get there. what you really need to do is;
1 have a coronary calcium score
2 quit eating too much sugar
3 lose 5% - 10% body weight, let nature cure itself
4 if you have inflammatory issues consider testing for hsCRP, C-K, liver enzymes and do carotoid artery ultrasound where blockage is used as a proxy for blockage elsewhere in the body.
2.
is all about calcium in your coronary arteries
1
I am always amazed that people are so quick to attack someone who tries to tell them that preventing heart attacks and other diseases is within their power. Making statements like, "reducing [cholesterol] prevents nothing. zero", and "Dietary cholesterol plays a role but is not at all the sole determinator of your cardiovascular risk" may sound authoritative or scientific, but they are lies that ultimately hurt people. You may not be willing to go vegan yourself, but don't spread misinformation.
I urge every single person out there who is concerned about heart disease and Alzheimer's to go to nutritionfacts.org and watch the videos Dr. Michael Greger and his staff have prepared, in which they synthesize the latest research in nutritional science. They don't make arbitrary statements; they show you the numbers and graphs, which you can check for yourself by looking at the papers they quote. There are other doctors out there who say the same thing, but Greger shows you the research. You owe it to yourself and to your loved ones.
It is only Sunday, but I would bet that this is the most important and, in its way, uplifting piece many of us read all week.
4
Your writing makes me remember when I heard the words, "You've survived. Not everyone does." The gratitude and pleasure of a beloved face, a frosty morning, a waffle, a dog's waggy demands for a walk--thank you for reminding me of the beauty of living today.
9
This article spoke to me and my wife on so many levels. I had a similar heart attack( the widowmaker), out of the blue about 4 years ago and was very lucky that I survived. I also had a syncope episode a couple of months after the heart attack.
The mental trauma, to me, my wife and my kids is an aspect that I see rarely articulated this well. Each unanswered phone call brings on wave of stress to the family. We are still getting over it on some level.
Thank you for bringing it out and sharing your experience. I am going to send the link for this article to my doctors as well.
14
I have a family history of coronary artery disease. My father died of a heart attack at age 64. At the age of 38, I had the first of two angioplasties to open my left anterior descending coronary artery. The Widow Maker. Seven years later, I had it done again.
Although I did not have a heart attack as did Mr. Lee, I came about as close as one could. Indeed, while on the table during the first procedure at Westchester Medical Center, the two young cardiologists unintentionally induced an infarction with the balloon catheter.
I am now 72 and have had no angina symptoms since. Why? I changed my way of living. I bought Dr. Dean Ornish's book and followed two of the three protocols --- Mediterranean diet (no red meat, no dairy except for nonfat yogurt, mostly fish, vegetables, and complex carbohydrates and exercise (daily brisk 30-minute walks, weather permitting.) Meditation, the third leg of the Ornish stool, was not for me. Needless to say, I quit smoking, too.
Do I think about dying? Of course. I thought about it at 38. I thought about it at 45. I thought about it yesterday. I will think about it tonight in bed. I will think about it tomorrow.
But these thoughts of passing are passing thoughts.
Right now I'm thinking about lunch.
24
I'm glad Mr. Lee was able to still be here to write this piece.
Once you hit 40, do not, skip annual cardiac workups.
Trends are important.
Blood pressure management is important.
Symptoms are important.
Understand that radiometric stress tests typically don't start detecting anomalies until an artery is already blocked enough to impede normal blood flow, often 70%-80% blocked.
In my case, the stress test anomaly was minor, but the angiogram showed a 95% blockage.
The only symptom ? Shortness of breath under exertion.
No neck pain. No chest pain. No sense of pressure.
Result: bypass surgery, before, I had a heart attack.
Lucky.
3
I am a heart attack survivor- 20 years from the event and 10 years from having a bypass. Every week I volunteer to work with heart patients at a local hospital. As the author notes, if you have never had a cardiac event it’s frightening. Patients seem reassured when I talk to them because my bypass was 10 years ago at the same hospital (“Your mileage may vary,” I add jokingly). They can see there is hope. Watch the movie, Forks over Knives on Netflix. Heart disease can be halted and even reversed. Dr. Dean Ornish wrote books about this 20 years ago. Go on a plant based diet (not that hard). Exercise. Mediate. Enjoy your family and friends. Don’t sweat the small stuff and remember that every day is a gift.
5
So we all do not take for granted the state of our medical profession today---many of us who experience the same heart condition described in this article would have died thirty years ago. What runs through my mind over and over again, is my heart attack occurred at about the same age my grandfather had his...He never made it out of the hospital. I on the other hand was playing tennis a month after I had my stint put in.
6
It was late December 2017, that during a regularly scheduled appointment with my general practitioner that I mentioned to her that I was having to stop on my walks with my two Springer Spaniels, Rory and Bentley because of chest pain and being out of breath. I was 63 years old at the time, a black man who has completed 4 marathons including one right after my 50th birthday. I knew Jim Fixx's story, so I knew long distance running was no prophylactic against heart disease. However, I discounted the pain thinking I could will it away. My doctor saved my life.
I too had a 99 percent blockage that was diagnosed that same day by the cardiologist down the hall from my primary care physician. The next day, I too was in a cath lab getting two stints put in to relieve the blockage in my "widow-maker".
I think about my near death experience every now and then, but I have a gallows humor about it, because as a black man from Pine Bluff , Arkansas and growing up in segregated Washington, DC, I never imagined I'd live to 40. So the last 20 plus years are gravy.
To the author, I wish you at least another 30 healthy years, so that like me, you can see your children reach adulthood and all of the joy that brings.
28
Mr. Lee, I'm sorry you experienced this but thank you for sharing this experience so as to help others.
I was struck by the deeply psychological aspect of your recovery and how well you painted the picture of living in it. The constant fear and anxiety of a near death experience is overwhelming and where you said that meditation has helped ease the way you carry this experience forward was something I connected with immediately.
Two years ago, at 41, I was driving down the highway when my car burst into flames in a freak electric fire. The months to follow had exactly the tenor of the constant, swirling dark thoughts and fears that you describe. We can all understand how detrimental to one's health that kind of extreme stress and anxiety can be, but I had the same experience with meditation - allowing me to live with my thoughts and fears, letting them pass, and no longer being subject to their harmful effects on my being. I still think about fire, but it doesn't make me anxious anymore.
I hate the thought of good people struggling with a physical health issue being consumed by the mental health issues that coincide with it. I encourage anyone struggling with that kind of anxiety to try meditation or to find the type of help or practice that makes the most sense to them.
8
Denial: I had a heart attack at 47 and spent several weeks prior denying that the pain in my chest was heart related until it was so bad that I had to go to the emergency room. Terror: Waiting for my angioplasty for several days in the hospital, I was terrified. I faced death down - but it was terrifying. Gratitude: Now 22 years and 10 stents later, I am grateful to modern medicine and to my doctors. It's been tricky dealing with the ups and downs - but the ups have been magnificent and the downs not as terrifying. Trymaine, you will get used to it. The terror fades and life becomes more precious every day.
2
Good health and long life to you, Mr. Lee. I really mean this, Take good care of yourself so that you can take good care of that wonderful family you treasure so much.
9
I am an anesthesiologist and I had a heart attack in 2016 at the age of 38. Luckily, it was a minor one that was treated with one stent.
Being a physician in this situation is a double edged sword. I have the medical knowledge to know that my care is optimized but I have also seen my share of disasters in the cardiac operating room and the cath lab.
Just like Mr. Lee, my physical rehab is complete but I will never be the same person I was prior to my heart attack. The silver lining is that I am better equipped to emphasize with a frightened patient before he or she is about to go under anesthesia and I will occasionally share my story.
Thank you Mr. Lee for giving us an intimate view of your experience.
15
I profoundly appreciate Mr. Lee's eloquent and insightful article, particularly the discussion of PTSD. In 2013, at the age of 69, I suffered a bowel obstruction whose surgery led to a mid-operation heart attack (I'd already had open-heart surgery years earlier). I was told later that I almost died twice, and the trauma surgeon told my wife "Call the kids." Mr. Lee doesn't mention what for me was the longest lasting cause of PTSD. "ICU syndrome." The frightening, more vivid than life, delusions experienced during the early stages of recovery exist in my mind as though they are still happening in the present.
5
Very well written, I felt that very strongly. I definitely can understand staying in the moment and understanding being present. I try to take that in to my everyday life as much as possible even without something this drastic having happened to me.
3
Mr. Lee,
I have watched your reporting on MSNBC with deep respect and admiration. You make yourself present to the people whose stories you are bringing to our awareness in a way that elicits their trust. You are earnest, interested, and, most of all, compassionate. The people you are talking with know it. We, the viewers, know it. We can feel it.
When you interviewed that mother in Chicago whose daughter had been hit and killed by a stray bullet, the tears began to roll down my cheeks. The flow intensified as we watched the girl's little brother playing on his bed while his mother spoke of the impact her death had had on him.
I believe God plucked you back from the jaws of death because of your capacity for love. In other words, because of your Big Heart. May you live long. May you continue to do such amazing work. May God bless your family.
We need you.
45
My father passed away in 1986 from a massive heart attack at the age of 42. I never thought it would happen to me, but my wife insisted that I go through a series of tests at the age of 38 just to make sure everything was okay. Knowing what happened to my father, I worked out incessantly and monitored my eating. Nonetheless, the doctors at Johns Hopkins said that family history had more influence on the condition of my heart than any preventative measure I may have adopted. I thank my wife every day, for one test led to another—-each showing signs of something being off. After running a camera through an artery in my wrist, I was told I have two complete blockages in my heart. However, because I ran so much, my heart naturally developed tiny bypasses called “collaterals.” These tiny passages allow blood to flow from one side of the heart to the other. While the road ahead is still unclear, this piece beautifully expressed everything I went through. Thank you for sharing.
16
We hear stories from the survivors, useful to gain pointers about survival methods and techniques.
Where I work, so far 4 of 5 events were fatal. At least two of four were cases of "indigestion", one of four was medical medical problems after intervention.
So I read the tales of the survivors, the only ones who can speak here. And see the balance of luck, avoidance of denial, and personal actions that contributes to survival.
2
Thank you for sharing your story. My husband woke up early one morning & his right arm hurt. He couldn't get comfortable so he went online, searching until he found something that said it could be heart related (usually it's the left arm that indicates heart trouble.) It took 24 hours before his blood enzymes finally showed a very mild heart attack; they said he probably only lost a few cells. They told us he was very lucky; young men usually die from heart attacks.
The cardiologist thought he may need a stent but the angiogram showed several severe blockages & he underwent quadruple bypass. He was 48 yrs old. When the Dr told me, I almost passed out, had to put my head between my knees. That was 15 years ago this month. It's been a very difficult journey. He takes buckets of pills and walks & hikes.
For me, it is a constant fear that is never far away. When he's out hiking, I pray he'll come home to me. When he falls asleep in front of the TV, I wake up & have to force myself to go check to make sure he truly is asleep and not dead in the chair. He goes to the cardiologist and endocrinologist 3 times a year. We were told the bypass was good for 20 years so now I'm starting to worry he may need another in the not so distant future.
The worry is always there, a constant refrain that plays out in the back of my mind in an endless loop. Worst of all, I can't share these fears with anyone, not my husband or children. Whatever fears he has, he keeps to himself as well.
15
@Stacy Alesi, I hope you will talk with each other when you can, and whether before that or after, with a helper--a psychologist or other person who works with people post-trauma. As this article shows, you are not alone, and neither is your husband; your children may well need help, too. They have even fewer emotional resources than adults do, and need you to be able to respond to them. Ending the isolation and silence, recognizing the company you have and the ways you might help yourselves and each other will make a great difference to the good for you. The life you still have and share can be a good one--don't let it be less!
5
@Stacy Alesi I am so sorry you are living with this constant fear. May I suggest you talk about it to someone-it will help, really. Your minister? A counselor? a friend? This is not healthy for YOU either. I know! My grandfather was killed in a car accident (drunk hit him)-for years I feared the unexpected phone calls, the times my parents drove someplace, the waiting for a phone call-so while it wasn't heart related, I understand. Only when I was able to talk about it to someone did I start healing. Is it 100% better? No-at 65 it's still there, but not in the front of my mind every time the phone rings.
4
I am a 7 month survivor of a heart attack at age 53. What I find most INFURIATING about the comments here is that the point of this article is that you can be a healthy person living a healthy lifestyle AND STILL HAVE A HEART ATTACK!
I had low cholesterol, low blood pressure, normal body weight (BMI of 23), very healthy diet of lots of fruits and veggies. Quit smoking 25 years ago. Quit drinking 15 years ago. No sugar or fried foods for 15 years. No family history of heart disease. Had a physical two months prior with a glowing report and "no concerns at this time" as bottom line.
You cannot prevent heart disease by diet and exercise or any other lifestyle change. You can only lower your risk which isn't the second thing at all.
Everyone dies! Everyone's body gives out eventually. This is the only fact we can count on with 100% certainty.
13
@Martha You are almost right. 1-each person is born with a weak link in some location or propensity to failure: prostate, heart, breast, brain, etc. . 2-the aging process consists of a decrease in both performance, resilience and vulnerability to disease. Put those two together and it becomes imperative to stretch the boundaries of traditional diagnostic tools. Exemplary life style choices you seem to have made are not enough. In addition one must trace true causes of any symptoms subtracting from optimal life quality. Easy to say, hard to find medical practitioners working globally, with an integrative model of health.
3
@Martha yes-and I try and tell my very healthy/marathon daughter that she needs to be fully aware of our famiy genetic issues-me, my brother, my mother-all with issues. She MUST tell her Dr about the family history. So far, I'm afraid it has not sunk in.
1
@Martha maybe it is just that people want the comfort of thinking that they can control their life, especially when it comes to avoiding its termination. And so they suggest an array of interventions, from the good to the ridiculous. Some are irrelevant, and most, at the current state of the art, can only reduce your risk a bit over the long run. The risk is still there, and you can indeed have a perfectly healthy life style and still go off with a little bang.
6
Just like the author, I too had a blockage of the LAD, 90%, a year and a half ago at age 48. Trymaine’s experiences are eerily similar to my own; thank you for naming the lingering ghost that is trauma. At worst, it’s hyper-vigilance and anxiety about every minor chest pain. In better moments, it gives rise to a counterintuitive feeling of gratitude, as in “dude, this changes everything.” Mortality and death are no longer abstract concepts but instead daily and (weirdly) generous companions. Grappling with this dueling mix of emotions is a challenge. It sounds hokey, but the (new to me) practice of writing poetry seems to help me make sense if it all.
wounded
fall wind starts to blow
sudden storm and slow
a raw swath from one
side river to the other
busted limbs, broken trunk
a spell of cold chaos
splinter bleach bone
pierces pale skin
see the small invisible space
between root and earth
and know that nothing
will ever feel the same again
15
Thank you for sharing your family’s story.
Brought tears and a wave of emotions .
My son almost lost his life last year in a mudslide and this reminded me that moment will always be with him!
4
I’m glad to hear you’re on the mend, Mr. Lee.
I, too, had a similar heart attack just over three months ago (luckily while I was in hospital surrounded by cardiac experts), and they also fixed me with two stents. I’m 59, by the way and a great fan of the benefits of cardiac rehabilitation.
Why shouldn’t we, and others in our position, make full and long recoveries? We’re in better condition than we (unknowingly) were at the time of our attacks, and we’ve changed our lifestyles for the better.
I’ve never lingered on the dark side of this event and will always be grateful to all who helped me.
There’s lots to look forward to: I hope your family is well, as mine is, and I’m eagerly awaiting better weather and the start of the cricket season, although the team I support aren’t very good!
8
Eighteen years ago I came across a situation where I almost died. I was in great pain, completely aware of the circumstances, and surprised it was all happening on a quiet day with lovely weather. To truncate the whole thing, I pulled through. Since that day I have never taken anything for granted. Once I got out if the hospital, out of my wheelchair, and on with my time, I decided to live life without fear. I didn't make a bucket list in as much as raise my expectations for my own health, attitude toward life, and to jump into situations rather than shy away from the possibility of failing at something. After all, failure is highly overrated. I'm looking at turning 70 in a few months. I exercise, eat well, and to keep my mind active, I take violin lessons. Too late for violin lessons? Nonsense. I feel like playing a violin, so I'm going to do so. Grab it all while you can. Putting things off for some future date is an illusion. Death is always a moment away, we simply live under the cloud that it is an abstract event to be shoved to a distant time. I don't fear death. I fear not really living.
29
I had a pulmonary embolism that went undetected for two weeks. That was in 2012. To this day every doctor or nurse that hears my story doesn’t understand why I didn’t die. What I learned was that you have to listen to your body and insist with the doctors. I felt a sharp pain and was short of breath. Because I was in Budapest and about to take a river cruise the next day, I called my doctor in Miami who said to call a doctor because he thought I had a PE. So I did, a doctor came to the hotel, checked me out and said I was fine, that I had been eating too many fatty foods. So we went on the cruise and then a week in Prague. All along with a side pain and shortness of breath. In Prague I called my cousin who is a doctor in Paris, (we were going there next) and director of three ER’s . He said to come straightfrom the airport to the ER. We did and as soon así arrived they did all kinds of tests and confirmed I had had a PE, admitted me and wouldn’t let me move from the bed. Bombarded me with blood thinners so I could come back to the US. Back in the US I was put on Coumadin for 6 months and have been fine ever since. But there is not one day that I don’t think about this. It is always in the back of my mind. So when you have a near death experience, yes, you are much more aware that you can die any minute. You just have to decide if you will worry about or you will enjoy every day as much as you can. I chose the latter.
9
@Charlie
I had a TIA in London, and we went to the emergency room, but because my symptoms were over by the time I got to there, they wouldn't do an MRI. They only recommended I take baby aspirin. I had to fly home two days later, with the fear of having another TIA at 30,000 feet. Fortunately, I made it and am now taking three medicines to keep everything under control, but now I am somewhat fearful of traveling out of the country, especially alone.
Thank you, Mr. Lee, for verbalizing what I have been feeling. I don't feel so alone.
2
Thank you for sharing your story. We often don't think about the trauma after a trauma.
7
Great article. I am older than Mr. Lee but similar in that I was in good shape, active & non-smoker. But I have a bad family history and I jus hadn't felt right for almost 18 months. So I switched physicians and found one who was more aggressive with testing. My calcium score showed a severe blockage (>70%) in the widow-maker. 48 hours later a 91% occlusion was double stented. And not a day goes by when I don't think of the alternative outcome. But being Catholic/Christian, I have dealt with the sadness by realizing that life is not my own. My purpose is not yet over. So I thank God for the extended time and I live life now a whole lot more gratefully.
4
As a nurse practitioner, I could not help but be struck by the poor care the author received at the clinic. You feel dizzy and have chest pressure? Brother, we are going to call 9-1-1 for you. Not even going to do an EKG in the office. You need to be in the ER NOW! I'm sure lab work would have shown an evolving myocardial infarction at that time, even if the EKG wasn't too specific. I take no chances with chest pain, especially when it's combined with other telling symptoms. I shudder to think that the author could have gone home and died, after being reassured he was OK.
50
@JenD
I'm an RN and your comments are on point. The focus of saving money in health care has driven medical care providers to not look for the zebra in a field of horses, and subsequently many patients slip through the cracks without a comprehensive work-up and appropriate interventions, often resulting in catastrophic or deadly outcomes. But, a few million dollar malpractice lawsuits mean nothing compared to the millions of dollars saved by health insurance companies and their greedy, unconscionable CEOs.
20
Thank you Mr. Lee:
I’m glad you survived to tell your story. It got my attention even though I cause my condition before I had a heart attack or stroke. I had open heart surgery with five bypasses about two months ago and have recovered nicely although I have a way to go. I have a good diet, plenty of exercise and thought I was the epitome of good health at 68. I was to find out that my heart condition was a result of family DNA and my body’s tendency to produce too much LDL.
So much has been said in the comments section of your article; I like to underline one important action that can help everyone gauge their own risks of heart problems:
Get a stress test.
I had plenty of tests, EKGs, blood tests, statin prescriptions, no family history etc. none of them warranted further treatment; I had this under control.
Wrong! About three months ago I developed burning sensations in my chest after walking. I saw my doctor and was prescribed a stress test which I took three days later. It led to an angiogram which led quickly to a five bypass open heart surgery.
I wouldn’t be here now if I had not been able to get this critical test. I’m not a health professional but I believe we should all elevate the importance of getting a regular, scheduled . . .
Stress test every one to two years!
Congratulations! Thank you.
5
I was struck by you telling your daughter that she will do great things one day. Obviously you love your daughter deeply and are, I assume, trying to boost her self-esteem. I wonder if telling her she will do something great one day has a potentially damaging effect on her self-esteem. I believe that people need to learn that they are good enough just being themselves, they don't need to do anything to prove their worth. For some it can be incredibly hard seeing that they are fully worthy of love and esteem just as they are, with all their weaknesses and flaws. I think there is a risk your daughter could go through adulthood feeling she has to do something "great" to live up to your expectations, wondering if what she is doing counts as "great", feeling the pressure always for the future time when she will have accomplished whatever this "great" thing is, rather than learning to accept fully who she is right now, and being able to make the most of each present moment.
15
I just reread your sentence and you actually say "special" rather than "great". That makes the case even stronger—"special" suggests something out of the ordinary, different from other people, beyond. Doesn't that tell her that, to live up to what you believe of her, she has to do something beyond all the others around her? That's a heavy burden to bear into adulthood.
1
Thank you, Jane; I had the same thoughts. Perhaps Mr. Lee may want to, if he hasn’t already, have some conversations with his daughter, at her level, about her own trauma and fears at nearly losing her daddy, and about what he meant by great things - which, I think, was probably reaching for her stars and her dreams, but which may not have been interpreted that way by her, as you so thoughtfully observed.
1
the pressure is real and the fear of failure great
2
Like Mr. Lee I had a heart attack out of the blue. I was 36, was fit, never smoked and was within normal weight. Despite diet, drugs and treatment, the heart disease continued requiring quadruple bypass at age 48. I'm now turning 52, still on the same drugs doing the same treatment. I don't know how effective it is. Time will tell.
Mr. Lee says it all "I have tomorrow, or at least this moment. I want to live"
6
I had a scare just 3 weeks ago. A severe pain in my chest woke me up in the early morning. I felt nauseous during the day and dizzy and off kilter. The next morning I decided to go to the ER. Thankfully all tests came back normal. No heart attack. Heart disease is in my family. My dad had a heart attack in his 40s and my mom ultimately died of one in her 70s so I figured better safe than sorry.
I still feel delicate even though I’m in the clear and plan on paying out of pocket for a heart scan for piece of mind.
1
That brought tears in me and remind how important to take care of our health specially heart.
6
I am very sorry to see no mention in this powerful article about the direct connection between heart disease and the fat-drenched, meat and dairy rich American diet.
For anyone who wants the latest scientific research on that connection, I highly recommend How Not to Die: Discover the Foods Scientifically Proven to Prevent and Reverse Disease
by Michael Greger MD.
It may change your life - and prolong it too
14
@Samsara
Thank you for posting this.
Dr. Greger says that, because what is considered "normal" is really very unhealthy, the first symptom people get is a fatal heart attack.
All of my middle aged friends who have high cholesterol have told me that it is genetic.
I seriously doubt that. I see what they eat.
1
@RW
I want to add that I am in no way disrespecting Mr. Lee's plight. I really feel for him, but I want doctors to give their patients better information about staying healthy.
@Samsara
Nonsense.
The one and only human race species evolved fit for biological genetic DNA survival in Africa 300, 000+ years ago. We are programmed by nature and nurture to crave fat, salt and sugar while hunting and gathering and dying before 40 years old.
Fat, sugar and salt used to be hard to find and rare. You can't change that heritage nor select better parents. We shop in person or online instead of hunting and gathering. We have science and technology to fight disease and injury.
1
About six months ago, I suffered a cardiac arrest. Fortunately, I had just landed and was at the gate of a major airport on a major airline. There was a physician on board that provided CPR until EMS came on board, about 10 mins. My deepest thanks to the physician who allowed me to live. EMS were able to jolt my heart back into normal sinus rhythm. About two months later a echo cardiogram confirmed no cardiac damage.
But what I am left with is indeed PTSD, like the rug was pulled from beneath my feet. This has left me with some sad and fretful days, there are very few maps on how to navigate this new terrain.
Thanks for this article, reassuring me that this is my new normal.
19
Carol I survived a heart attack and 2 cardiac arrests 25 years ago back in 1994 when I was 36. There is an online support group that I have found helpful. Here is the link http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/viewforum.php?f=24
2
I had a scare during a time of enormous personal stress that resulted in acute chest pains; all tests said I was fine, likely reflux caused by the stress. But the fear stuck and I definitely worry about “the end.” Not seeing the kids grow, missing out on sunsets, etc. What gets me the most: knowing our time is limited, and so much of it we waste because we’ve got to earn money to feel comfortable. Tempted to delete this little monologue, but whatever, I’ll submit it. Deep breath, hug the kids, do some exercise (endorphins!), and try to stay in the moment when possible.
12
Thank you for a wonderful article Mr. Lee! I am a physician whose heart attack almost five years ago at the at age of 51 presented with sudden death when I collapsed in front of my two youngest children after my heart went into an unsustainable rhythm. I came back a few minutes later and asked my wife to drive me to the hospital. Treating a heart attack and making lifestyle changes are relatively straightforward challenges. Mr. Lee captures the tougher challenge of what to do with the emotional aftermath. What has helped me is to realize that every breath I take I do so by the grace of God and make a point to live in an attitude of gratitude for the continued life I've been given. To me that seems to be a much healthier approach than living in fear or feeling victimized.
8
Regarding the illustration, it is not anatomically correct. There is no vessel descending from the apex of the heart, near the ventricles. The descending thoracic aorta branches off the aorta and supplies blood to the lower body. The descending aorta does sit behind the heart, but it does not make a turn to the left (the patient's left, the viewer's right) to appear to emerge from the apex. A comment from a recent nursing school graduate.
6
After my father's first heart attack at 50, he never recovered emotionally. He already suffered from anxiety and depression, but he was so involved with church and AA and helping others that he seemed happy and well-adjusted. He was a phenomenal story-teller and cut-up, hugely warm and welcoming.
After the heart attack he quarreled with all of his friends and withdrew from his church, AA meetings, and volunteer work in prisons. He was more depressed than ever, and constantly worried about another heart attack, He wasn't as afraid of dying as of the pain and the trauma (both emotional and physical) that he experienced in the hospital.
There needs to be more recognition of, and help for the emotional consequences of heart attacks.
It doesn't necessarily heal over time.
The causes are not solely "emotional". There is evidence that being hooked up to machines to pump blood affects brain function ("pump head").
My father's personality was never quite the same after he was resuscitated, and he suffered. It was frustrating and heartbreaking not knowing how to help him. How much extra pain is caused because we don't understand and might think the person should snap out of it?
My father also had trauma from childhood abuse, which may have set him up for early health problems and depression.
So much more research and education is needed on PTSD after life-threatening medical conditions. Thank you to this author for addressing this.
30
@Hdb
Thank you for this. I was diagnosed with Atrial Myxoma (a rare tumor of the heart, which can cause stroke and/or sudden death) six months ago, at the age of 46. I was diagnosed on a Friday and in surgery the following Wednesday. I just finished my course of cardiac rehab recently. Since my surgery, when I get depressed, my husband tells me that I should be grateful for every day. Of course I am, but I still struggle with the day-to-day sometimes and then I feel guilty about that. And when I see these comments that people changed their lives and now live with gratitude and grace... I wonder why that didn't happen to me. Rehab and staying active has helped me, though.
3
Found your story inspiring. I am sure all of us will go through painful experiences during our lifetime. Good luck and I am sure your daughter will have great future.
7
You must be so grateful to the medical professionals who helped save your life. I certainly hope they advised you to consider a whole-foods, plant based diet going forward and didn't just prescribe pharmaceuticals!
9
No tunnel, no lights, only a vivid description of an event that still occurs much, much too often.
A heads-up to all of us who are only fooling ourselves by hoping to get around to, getting in shape and changing our diets to one containing no sugar or little of it, some day soon.
Mr Lee, thank you for the wake-up call.
Also a truly fantastic pulsating and eye-catching illustration headlining your article by Eiko Ojala.
8
@Saul RP, I had a tunnel and rings of light. But I know that all kinds of things transpire to human beings... And yes, it's good to be healthy in habits--but I have no illusions that it's a panacea for the many illnesses and eventual deaths we do face. Carpe diem, that's the message I take most to heart here.
1
All best wishes for a long , happy, and healthy life.
8
Amen. Well. May you have "life even more abundantly".
There is nothing more life affirming, frightening and threatening than to deal with an incurable chronic condition that focuses your mind on your mortality. Among my multiple maladies are diabetes, cancer, heart disease plus high blood pressure and cholesterol.
About a month ago on a bright sunny clear unseasonanly warm Chicago weekend afternoon I heard a loud crash over my left shoulder as I was walking along on the sidewalk as a pedestrian. I instinctively dove to the right onto the ground as a car was coming towards me and crashed against the garage wall where I had been walking. I was in a state of shock. As the cops and fire and ambulance came. I told them that I was ok except for a " minor" cut.
Later that afternoon I stopped to get medical care for my 7 stitch gash and a few cuts and bruises and a DPT shot. But the emotional and mental turmoil of what might have been much worse brought home again how precious fleeting and fragile life can be.
14
Thank you so much for your story Trymaine, I had a heart attack in 2015, I was only 15 years old when it happened.
When it happened at the time, and since, I feared what was going to happen, where I going to survive.
I have many moments since where I fear if I am ever going to see the next beautiful sunset, see my family and friends one more time.
I was very lucky that I had some parents, who would do everything in their power to be there for me, in the years after the heart attack, where I was sick with various heart diseases.
I was also very fortunate to have friends who would help to try and make me forget my sickness and treat me as if there was nothing wrong.
Some of the things you have been through Trymaine, and many others, I have tried myself retraining, psychologist and meditation/mindfulness.
I have also learned something valuable from you story, something which I myself have never thought about before to try and think:
"I could have died.
I didn’t. I have tomorrow, or at least this moment. I want to
live."
And again thank you for this great but also sad story.
37
My father recently died of heart disease. When this happened I thought let me see if there are preventive tests to determine arteries being clogged. I found there was. 2 simple tests that were preventive care. So you had to pay for them, but they were cheap. In doing this we found my husband had issues. He now goes to a cardiologist. There is preventive testing..hint hint
17
Hmmm, for me, it was a cerebral aneurysm. Interesting story. Just one question, why do you want to be buried at all? Cremation makes a lot more sense.
3
@Ken Sayers - That’s what you took away from this article about a 38-year-old man’s heart attack? Whether he wants to eventually be buried or cremated is none of your business. Some religions prohibit cremation and some people simply aren’t comfortable with it. Everyone needs to do what is best for them and their families, including recovering from a massive heart attack, without some sanctimonious stranger questioning the validity of their choices.
3
It's so important not to ignore symptoms. I'm in my 70's with no history of heart disease, but several months ago, for no reason I suddenly felt very dizzy, as if I were about to faint. I lay down, thinking it would pass, but it did not. After several minutes, I decided to take my blood pressure. My pulse was an alarming 32, so low that I thought the monitor must be malfunctioning, but when repeated readings remained in the low 30's I knew I needed to get to the ER. I was diagnosed with heart block, and a few hours later, I had been transferred to a hospital specializing in heart problems, and by that evening, I had a pacemaker. My doctors tell me that it was extremely fortuitous that I knew to take my blood pressure and get to the ER. I could have died. That fact is always in my mind. It's made me determined to make the most of the rest of my life.
9
@Edie Clark
He went to a clinic the day before the attack and they noted a heart issue on the EKG but sent him home with a diagnoses of gas. I'd be lawyering up right about now, at least to cover the medical expenses from the following day.
6
You make a major point. When I first experienced the crazy rapid heartbeats of atrial fibrillation - which ultimately landed me in the emergency and operating rooms - one doctor said it could be my stomach (because, she said, "it's close to the heart") and prescribed probiotic yogurt; another said just gas. Be persistent, find a new doctor if out-of-the-ordinary symptoms continue!
5
@Edie Clark How about a PCP who tells your 23-year-old that his weird de ja vu feelings were the result of graduate school stress when in fact he had a lethal glioblastoma? It's been ten years now (an outlier of survival stats), and he still suffers extreme anxiety from time to time, fearful of recurrence.
6
Wonderfully written. I'm so glad you made it to the hospital in time.
There is nothing more important for us humans to do than to be present in the moment. No one should have to go through a heart attack to get there.
10
@Morgan, some people do and some never ever live in the moment.
Very powerful story. Thanks for sharing.
5
Congratulations on surviving ! I had a heart attack when I was 52 years old and fortunately was rushed to the hospital by my wife (an RN). The next day I had quadruple by-pass surgery and I am now 76 years old and consider myself the luckiest person in the world.
I visit my cardiologist once a year , and have a stress test every other year. I try to walk two miles a day and watch my diet.One of the most important thing I think in preventing a heart attack is to quit smoking. Nicotine kills your body on a cellular level that leads to the death of organ function slowly.
Be brave and live each day, eventually the fear of death will subside, and the joy of life will win.
8
Thank you for this excellent article. I have always admired your MSNBC reporting and look forward to seeing it for many more years.
8
Thank you for this beautiful essay, Mr. Lee. It's given me so much to think about this morning. You have such a lovely family and they're so lucky to have you.
10
Not a heart attack, but a diagnosis of Stage 4 incurable cancer. Treatable but statistically likely to recur.
Unlike the author my diagnosis took over 5 weeks, during which I was offered no solid information on treatability or survivability. A period of indescribable stress, the worst part was having to tell my children. I was going through treatment just as Congress was attempting to deny health benefits for pre-existing conditions. I was now one of those people.
Like survivors of other traumas, disease related or not, you're not the same person afterwards that you were before. Your renewed appreciation of life is tempered by the flashbacks to the initial moments and a present, if sublimated, knowledge of the potential for recurrence.
I've written about my experience, though not as concisely as the author. That effort has occasionally left me sweat drenched as I revisited memories of what occurred. I was warned by an oncological therapist that the writing process could recreate anxieties, but I scoffed. Wrongly, as it turned out. I never before associated PTSD with disease but have been assured that it is, in fact, a real and common result. I don't want to use it as any kind of excuse but it's challenging, if not impossible, to blank out the experience.
Thanks for giving voice to the ever present, if unspoken, uncertainties many of us have, and continue to have, even as the original event recedes with time.
40
Interesting. After my MI my only thoughts were of how awesomely beautiful it is on the other side. I never once, until reading this piece, considered what I might not get to do or see. My focus remains on the wonders of life that death brings. Seriously.
11
@H Cooke Read, Same. I had septic shock and my experience was that I was melting into the universe — no longer a drop but part of the ocean. I had a deep and expansive joy. I was able to “return” or cohere for my family as a decision but I experienced a sense of loss for not being able to let go. It too a full year of difficult recovery physically and some time to rejoin the living. I was interested at the authors experience as well.
2
Thanks, I had my heart attack at 64, and except for the cholesterol, was also generally fit and healthy. I placed in the top ten (in my age group) in a Road Runners 5K race just ten months before. Our experience was very similar both in symptoms, reaction and failure to act promptly. Likewise I too think of the 'next one' happening almost constantly; your comments on the similarities to PTSD is apt and helpful. I've since changed my diet, and practice weigh control but I've failed to deal with the mental aspects, so I guess it's back to counseling. Thank you, and hopefully you'll se you daughter graduate from college. Good luck
10
Thank you Mr. Lee for sharing this important moment in your life's journey. There is no telling how many lives you will save today with your detailed account and the letters already contributed by others. For myself, I will send this to my sons (2) today as a reminder that their own father must have felt many of these same feelings during his post-heart attack recovery (age 42) however unexpressed they may have remained. It is a timely reminder as we come toward February, 'heart healthy month' where many in healthcare will again wear red to promote heart health, care and awareness of symptoms. You are ahead of the curve today. Thank you!
10
I had a major heart attack at 39; I am now 72. I don't worry about it any more. I made the life style changes and feel good. I also console myself that my heart is checked by a great cardiologist twice a year, which doesn't apply to most people. I feel ahead of the pack.
12
Mr. Lee captures the unwieldy power of trauma on one's life extremely well.. When I was 21 I was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer, the same year my parents were in the middle of a nasty divorce. Neither of them could be in the same room at the time and often didn't have the mental acuity to be there for me, though they tried. As an only child I spent a lot of time alone. I found meditation, which I attribute in many ways for saving my psyche during these times. Miraculously, I am successful and healthy now, but Ms. Fuller's comment of "It never leaves you", and the thought of making sure you don't become numb from your experience, can not be more accurate. It's sharing experiences such as Mr. Lee's and Ms. Fullers that we need more of. The more we can empathize with each other's shared trauma (we all have it at some point in our lives) the less numb we become as humanity. Empathize, share, heal, and repeat. This is life's real success.
63
As a retired physician I'd like to give a little advice:
1. Find out all your family history and write it down. Be persistent in asking all your family for every detail, including the age of onset of any family health problems. Look up all those conditions on Wikipedia and check to see if you have any of the risk factors or any of the SYMPTOMS! Type out and print out all of this to give to your primary care doc.
2. Insist on taking the time and energy to get rid of any nicotine use. Do whatever it takes. Ditto cocaine (big risk for heart attack). Keep alcohol use to less than 8 oz of wine or 16 oz of beer, or 2 oz hard liquor per day!! Get rid of other substance abuse issues including overeating. Go to counseling, get hypnosis, whatever it takes. It's worth doing this for yourself but also for the ones you love!!! Take the time now or time may be short.
3. Get yourself to an ideal weight. Exercise an hour three times a week. No money for a gym? Use your stairs or a step stool.
4. You are the most important person in your life and a very very important person in your family's life. Take care of yourself. Meditation, counseling, whatever it takes. It's all available on the internet if you are short on money.
5. If you have experienced trauma of any kind: fast or slow, physical or mental, your body remembers even if you self-medicate to forget. Read Van de Kolk's book: " The body keeps the score." Get help!
And Good Luck!
174
@memosyneThank you. Advice we all know, or should, but that we may not always heed. Thus the importance of #4: "You are the most important person in your life....Take care of yourself." We can't care for others if we don't care for ourselves (he wrote, four months to the day after quintuple bypass surgery).
6
What about sleep habits?
1
So what are you going to do about it? What are you going to change so you don’t have another heart attack?
Suggestion: Change your diet. Just eat plants.
A whole food plant based diet has been repeatly demonstrated to halt and REVERSE heart disease.
Animal products, including meat, dairy and eggs, increase rates of heat disease. Plant foods lower them.
If you want to live, eat plants.
22
Many of us resonate to what you describe, especially regarding the symptons before the attack and then its onset. We should do more to tell people not to belittle the signs that something serious is happening.
When I had my heart attack, I thought it was simply a sign of stress (I had to teach that day). I only went to the hospital six hours later and was then rushed to the local university hospital to have a stenting procedure, like the author of the piece.
The good news is that for many of us who made it through, life can often be much better afterwards as we start taking time off to enjoy the many wonders of life and, especially, the love of our dear ones.
I am grateful, fifteen years later, to have been given a second chance. Life is so much better now.
14
Survived one when I was 40 in 1990. I, too, am a journalist. Been symptom free since, but on meds. What it has left me with is an acute sense of my mortality. Most of us never think we will ever die. But in my case, it has been an awareness that it is a "when" not "if."
A friend told me in the hospital that doctors will tell you not to do many things. Listen to about "70 per cent of their advice," and don't go into a funk. Followed that advice.
14
You are both very unlucky and lucky to have survived. I hope you will learn from your experience. While some people are more at risk than others for heart disease, most of it is avoidable through a good diet and exercise. I hope you will look into eating a heart-healthy diet, because dietary factors are likely to have been part of what caused your heart attack, as they figure in most heart disease today in our country. There is conflicting advice about what is the best heart-healthy diet, so read broadly, and get professional consultations, but ultimately use your own native intelligence to figure out the truth about diet. Nutrition is still an evolving discipline, but there is a lot that we do know that can help to prevent heart disease, or recurrent heart attacks. Good luck with your journey, and I wish you long life and health!
4
@Samantha
"I was a mostly healthy former high school and college athlete. I don’t smoke or have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes or a family history of heart disease or early death. Yearly checkups with my doctor never included any mention of heart disease. So I never considered worrying."
What, exactly, is Mr. Lee supposed to "learn?" Can people please stop with the lecturing of those who survive health calamities?
33
@Samantha
Not only does a sensible diet positively affect heart (and other organ) health, it has the added benefit over drugs of having rare if any negative side effects.
Big Pharma has gotten bigger and bigger over the decades. Whatever increase in longevity that has resulted, such as it is, is replaced with an increase in Alzeimer's Disease and other dementia.
Ask your doctor for clinical studies that have pitted your prescribed drugs against diet and exercise change. Good luck.
4
@eheck------------------No, silly. Lecturing someone is entirely different from offering help, such a suggesting to become a vegan who have extremely low heart disease events.
Heart attacks (especially repeated ones) can cause a disease called chronic heart failure (when you don't have enough viable muscle) which I feel is largely ignored by the public. CHF mortality is worse than most cancers (50% at 5 years) but gets far less attention than it should.
8
I was diagnosed with a rare and very dangerous cancer 3 years ago when my son was two. While not sudden like a heart attack, the PTSD and anxiety aspects around recurrence or metastasis sound similar. My brother, a physician, told me to just start taking an anti anxiety medication (duloxetine, in my case). It has helped me more than I can express. My wife is also grateful that I eventually took that step, as I was driving her crazy (these constant fears are much harder on the spouse than one ever realizes).
Thank you for this piece, particularly the parts about dread, and the difficulties of mental recovery. I hope you’re doing well.
29
I had a heart attack at age 61 while playing golf. I an now 72 and a vegan. I would urge everyone to read Caldwell Esselstyn’s book “Reverse and Prevent Heart Disease.” I now follow a vegan diet with no oils. I do take statins which together with the Esselstyn’s diet has reduced my overall blood cholesterol to 150.
30
This is a powerful piece. I have a question though: why is it a good idea to run a half-marathon, 21 kilometers? Does that not overstress a damaged heart?
7
@ S North If you train right, the heart gets in shape for it, so not only are you training your heart for the marathon, you are training it to handle stress better. Exercise is critical in training the body to handle stress.
9
Welcome back!
You will notice that life continues to require needing to be earned, isn’t it?
Perhaps there is a greater purpose to life?
Which is more than appreciating higher the pizza, the daughter’s school, and Beyoncé’s first steps. It could be WHY the pizza, the daughter and Beyoncé’s first steps.
Etc.
5
Dear Mr. Lee,
Thank you for writing candidly about your heart attack. I am three weeks out from mine, and the experience is still a bit raw, but it tracks quite closely with yours.
The most alarming fact you note is that 30 percent of heart attack patients are between the ages of 35 and 54, though I shouldn't be surprised since I fall within that range, as did my father. He didn't survive his, and I attribute my survival in part to concerted lifestyle, diet, and exercise choices I made after he had died. Thankfully, too, advancements in medical technology over the past 30 years have helped level the playing field for those of us hamstrung by family histories of heart disease.
Three weeks out, I approach most food with more skepticism than trepidation, and although I only have to tweak as opposed to overhaul my diet, I have accepted the fact that I must remain vigilant. I take comfort in hearing from you that the further I get from my heart attack, the more the fear will subside.
Sincerely yours
Martin
23
@Martin
These stories of survivors are genuinely edifying. I'm into the early 20s and starting to recognize the importance of a healthy and sustainable lifestyle. As per the listed salubrious activities, I began metidations, joggings, and consuming more veggies.
I wish your wellbeing, Martin. Thank you for sharing your story!!
11
@Martin
Please see comment above from Michael Talbert re Caldwell Esselstyn’s book “Reverse and Prevent Heart Disease.”
1
The worst part is this type of incident leaves you prone to panic attacks which play tricks with your heart. Those attacks can change the intensity of your heartbeat, they make you sweat, leave your being foggy, and you think “My God, is this another one?”
As time passes the realization of the vulnerability does fade, but it takes time for some of us. And we almost are expected to shut up about it too, because after all, everybody else is still normal.
I had an acute cardiac event requiring a pacemaker 11 years ago. It took a long time to “forget” about it. The one thing that maybe would help is knowing that it is normal to feel abnormal about the whole thing.
I think about people who endure any illness or injury. It just leaves some of us with that sort of unwanted monster - perhaps we could call it our own type of PTSD.
The longer out we are, the more follow-ups we have that are fine, the better things get. But that takes time and patience.
Don’t be hard on yourself. You are just thankful for getting over a close call in your own way...and you did, Mr. Lee. It’s ok to move on. Sometimes we just need our own permission and that’s different for everyone, just like grieving.
21
A great story Mr. Lee that needs to be told and widely read, so thanks for sharing. I had a similar experience at age 74. I am retired and was running my dogs in preparation for a field trial in the woods of northern NH. I developed arm and chest pain, and as a physician, I knew what was happening. I walked out of the woods and drove myself to a friends house. I took an aspirin and had a friend drive me 11 miles to a hospital, where I walked into the ER. They confirmed I was having an MI, received some morphine and TPA ,and was air lifted to a heart center in Manchester, NH. I went from the helicopter pad into the cath lab and had a stent put into my 100% blocked LAD. The significant lesson of this tale is that in the weeks before the event, I had some temporary arm pain after hiking on the farm. Like many of the commentators, I had no risk factors for coronary disease, so I shrugged the arm pains off. I know now that the aching in my arms was angina. I should have gone in for a stress test asap, and saved myself from having a life threatening MI. With the aid of good physicians, cardiac rehab, meds, and another stent within a year, I have been fine for years. I am a little concerned that the my dangerous heart attack didn't cause much anxiety. Not sure what to make of that.
9
Mr. Lee, I feel your pain and fear. Not because I've had a heart attack, but because I have panic disorder. Panic disorder mimics many diseases, but it mostly mimics heart attacks. Recently, I spoke with an ambulance paramedic and he told me the difference is pain coming down your arm. I told him it was not true. Not all heart attack symptoms include pain down the arm. And I've had pain down my arm and it was a panic attack. Many times I've been to the emergency room or called an ambulance and it was always a panic attack. My fear is that one day I will be having a real heart attack and because of my history I will be dismissed as having a panic attack. And no, panic attacks are not the same as anxiety attacks as many claim. Panic attacks come unexpectedly and for no reason even when feeling happy. Eating well and exercise helps. Avoiding stress helps, too. And when having a panic attack, don't tell someone to breathe. It doesn't help. Just stay calm and just talk to the person normally while waiting for it to be over.
11
@ART
Possibly I misunderstood your post, so allow me to re-state: you know you're afflicted with an imaginary ailment and yet you write: "Many times I've been to the emergency room or called an ambulance and it was always a panic attack."
Does it not occur to you that in so doing. you are blocking medical resources which could have saved other people's lives or prevented them from suffering debilitating injuries? If you were trying to ridicule all those advocating for "parity" for psychological ailments, you have certainly succeeded.
To be fair, panic attacks are real not imaginary. I think considering the medical history, going to the hospital is smart.
13
@Ecoute Sauvage
I believe you have misunderstood ART's post.
The symptoms of a panic attack can be very similar to the symptoms of a heart attack.
It is possible to have both an anxiety disorder and a heart condition --in fact, anxiety disorders are a significant risk factor for cardiovascular disease -- and it is not unreasonable for an individual with a history of panic attacks to fear that the sudden onset of cardiac symptoms is a heart attack.
It is not unreasonable to go to an ER if you are experiencing unusually severe chest pain, dizziness, and shortness of breath. If it turns out that it was a panic attack, and not a heart attack -- that's good news, and not cause for shame.
What ART needs is effective treatment for panic attacks, which he's more likely to get if there is parity for psychological conditions.
15
Mr. Lee,
I shared a similar experience 31 years ago, when I was 41 years old. I went to nearby hospital complaining of chest pains only to be sent home with a diagnosis of muscle spasms - despite the fact that I advised the emergency room physician that my father died of a heart attack at 37. The damage to my heart was much more severe than yours; however, I have lead a full and productive life and still practice law at the age 72. I attribute my well being to the miraculous advances in medicine, an excellent cardiologist, as well as my vigorous and consistent exercise regimen, which consists mainly of walking on a treadmill and outdoors at a brisk pace. Long ago I stopped worrying about death, and I have been grateful for all that I have lived to see. When I had my heart attack in 1988 I never thought I would make it anywhere near 70. I would be happy to talk with you to share our experiences and provide you with encouragement.
45
Mr Lee: I'm 29 years past my heart attack and still going strong. So may you live to see your daughter walk down the aisle, have several grandchildren and enjoy the rest of your life. Good health and Good luck to you.
Sylvia Rackow
47
Mr. LEE, Thank you for having the courage to share your experience. I am delighted you are doing well. I wish you good health and a long, happy life.
6
Circumstances change everything. For a relatively young person, sudden death is the stripping away of everything at life’s apex, as with the author; but for someone whose life has been reduced to rubble by time and loss it is not a thing to fear.
So is it still called a widow-maker when the wife has abandoned you? Is it still considered tragic when the victim lives without love, and sees nothing but the loneliness of an empty apartment and financial insecurity for life’s final years?
I don’t think so. So I smoke, I drink, I eschew exercise and wait for the sweet release of death’s painful embrace from the vast loneliness of this existence.
Ah, there it is, the low chest pain. Soon.
9
@Fiona’s Ex I can understand feeling this way. Warm human connection is ultimately the one thing that makes life worth living. My father found it in AA and church, after 40 years of drinking and depression. He was a changed man after, changed 1000% for the better. Still rebellious and full of ribald humor, but now free of a heavy weight.
His heart attack and the fear it caused drove him away from people again, and back into what you described. Near the end, he reconnected with church and it comforted him. I offer this not advice finger-wagging advice, but as one point of data showing that's there are other options.
I say this as I skip church, again, partly because I haven't felt connected there yet (and bc of a broken ankle, but it's more the social anxiety, truthfully). Maybe I will call some friends today.
5
@Fiona’s Ex
It is possible to rise from the rubble. Just knowing that it is possible brings hope and from hope comes motivation. Support groups, in person or online, can be a life line. Volunteering to help another or a group will make a world of difference in how you see yourself and the world. Connection to others is critical. Look for weekly meetings in your area via Meetup or the newspaper. Going to mixed age group events is probably more beneficial. Quotes that let me keep going in the darkest stretch were:
Barn´s burnt down, now I can see the moon. Masahide
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being,the more joy you can contain. Kahil Gibran
Sometimes the loss of the illusion is greater than the loss itself. Sarah Ban Breathnach
He who saves one soul saves the world. Jewish wisdom
You are still here for a reason.
@Fiona’s Ex I don't know how old you are, but I wold like to think you might've benefited from counseling and meds too, if needed. Many of us have been "betrayed" by lovers, husbands, friends and not succumbed to a lonely, depressed life.
2
The more time that passes the less you think about it, for better or worse. And the less you alter your behavior - so better if you learn new habits in the immediate aftermath, and let that become the new normal. I had mine at age 45. I grew up with a father who had a heart attack, so I had advance notice of what to expect.
2
This is stunning, particularly the fact that you sought medical care before the heart attack, but were sent home.
I thought that doctor fear of malpractice suits made them hypervigilant about patient care.
Oh!: cost-effectiveness in a competitive market can't afford too much testing, too much time with actual hands-on care. Medicine is a business—need those rates of billings: lots of patients, little time with each.
So many lives lost by accident anyway. What's a little negligence?
8
65 when I had my surgery two years ago yesterday. Unbelievably lucky I did not have a heart attack considering I had 4 blocked arteries in my heart, the least blocked over 60% and one blocked 100%. Non smoker, not overweight, good cholesterol, no high blood pressure, non-drinker, doesn't matter, it can happen to anyone.
What saved me was a slowly developing condition called aortic valve stenosis, which takes years to become a problem but manifests as a worsening heart murmur. So I'd been going annually for an echocardiagram and a cardiac consult at the local hospital which had no regular cardiologist, just a rotating train of "travelers", medical staff that did temp work for hire at hospitals for short periods. But two years ago I got lucky, a retired cardiologist moved back to the community and was filling in and he was, I learned later, an excellent diagnostician.
During our consult he asked something I'd never been asked before "do you want to do a stress test?". Not thinking there was anything wrong I said yes and within 3 minutes on the treadmill he was on the phone to his previous hospital arranging my surgery. He thought I needed stents but a closer exam with an angiogram showed the extensive damage. So I wound up with a quad bypass and a valve replacement (since they were in there already). No heart muscle damage and I came through with flying colors.
And thanks to Medicare we didn't go bankrupt in the process. My recommendation? Get a stress test.
55
My husband had his first heart bypass operation at age 39. At the time it was experimental surgery and he had a fight with the insurance company to cover it. There were no cholesterol lowering drugs until many years later so he took blood thinners until the drugs were developed. At 60 he had the bypass redone. He went on to survive until age 84 and was active almost until the end. My point is: you can get quite a bit out of life after these cardiac events. During his forties he produced 6 movies and three Broadway plays. He enjoyed a very satisfying life. As he would tell his friends who came to him for advice about their heart disease: find the very best doctors and then do what they say.
11
At age 45, i was diagnosed with CHF (due to idiopathic dilated cardiomyopathy) and told by my doctor that i had < 5 years to live. That was in 1993, 25+ years ago. NEVER trust the medical opinion of a single doctor or the result (interpretation) of a test given only one time. Many physicians consider themselves to be God-like but they are not omniscient; in fact, many of them are not even competent. I trust and rely on my auto-mechanic more than i do many of my doctors.
12
I could not agree with this more.
A second opinion from another doctor when you feel something is wrong is often times the difference of life and death. I lost my twin sons to a doctors misdiagnoses March of last year. I often think of I had gotten a second opinion they might very well still be alive.
9
@Michelle-----------------Michelle, I am so very, very sorry. May the Great Spirit comfort you as time goes by.
I, too, have had devastating losses this year. All I can help myself, and possibly you, is to consider that we humans actually have only little, sparse 3-dimensional brains in a universe that has at least 15 dimensions. Time, itself, is a dubious concept, as is, I believe, almost all of our concepts. Our concepts reflect our brains, not the universe, I believe.
All we know is that we seem to have lost our beloveds. But "seem" is just a place-keeper word, required by our tiny brains' limitations.
Perhaps we shall be free, later.
My best,
Mary
2
@Michelle
I am so very sorry for your loss.
2
Had a cough for a year and half that 3 doctors (specialists) diagnosed as Whooping cough. Had my heart attack after running a mile on the treadmill. Stent placed. 100% blockage RCA: 70% blockage LAD. 1st day of cardiac rehab I was informed that if you have a cough that wont go away get your heart checked. My GP and 3 specialists did not know this. I was 48 and lead a healthy lifestyle (no risk factors, eg., no hbp: not obese: not diabetic: non smoker). 3 years later and the Mediterranean diet (along with continued exercise) my scans reveal no blockages and no scar tissue. The cardiologist in the ED said: "I'm lucky to be here." In the past 3 yrs 3 friends have died from heart attacks. All under the age of 50. Although less frequent, the pain and fear still occupies my mind. I've had panic attacks (which I've never had before) wondering will I have another one? I've developed a fear of speaking in public and being in large, close crowds. Physically the Dr's tell me I'm in great shape now. However, mentally, I'm not there yet.
30
@Greg
Group therapy can be useful! Good luck!
Thanks for the info! about the continued coughing.
(Sometimes people have very narrow blood vessels that can get blocked very easily -- not mentioned in the comments I have read.)
2
Same thing as you at 58 in 2012. Quit smoking, eat much better, meditate, run/walk 6 miles a day. Six plus years have softened the trauma. For some reason I actually have much less fear of dying than I used to have before the event.
10
Fabulous illustration of the heart pumping!
14
Psychoanalytically, that marathon may be emblematic of your quest in life, and living and breathing it as a correspondent. How can you manage that going forward? Hopefully you won't open chapters in your life where you are trying to prove things to yourself and your heart.
Sounds like you have good feet, without swelling and vein trouble. Luck is good to you, in that you don't have brain damage. I can only say, it is difficult playing the odds after a heart attack as a type of gambler, and maintaining the odds in one's favor on a daily basis, is a toss of the dice, hoping it is a winning day. CPAP and Exercycle are not bad ideas. Trump would have everyone as un insurable after their first heart attack. Eliminating stress from your life is a good goal.
4
Perhaps I have missed it in the article or comments but:
Mr Lee is an African American man and it is important for those of us from certain ethnic groups to be aware of our increased risk of death from cardiovascular disease.
Other ethnic groups include South Asians (India, Nepal, Sri Lanka etc) who die approximately 10 years earlier than Caucasians from CV disease.
There is a study currently called the MASALA study which you can find online.
By the way, I am a physician who works with Aboriginal Australians who also commonly have heart attacks in their 30s and sometimes 20s.
23
I too had a heart attack, mine at age 50, then another at age 62. The first one was a blockage of the LAD artery you mentioned, the "widow maker" heart attack. I think that when a person experiences a heart attack in middle age, or for the first time they can be in denial. I was sawing a tree down, laid down to rest, then had an enormous back spasm. It went away a few minutes later so I shrugged it off, told my son to call off the paramedics he had called. But that turned out to be a mistake, as I developed other serious symptoms later. Thanks for telling your story. A heart attack can happen anytime to anyone. It is good for people to understand and pay attention to the signs. And keep some baby aspirin around!
6
Thank you for an excellent article. I’ve learnt so much from reading it and also from the comments. In 2016, I checked myself into the ED as my BP monitor kept giving me an error reading and I did not feel well. At the ED, they could not get a reading on the ECG and kept me there. After a few days, the cardiologist advised inserting a pacemaker. I still fear every little twinge or dizzyness and developed anxiety. I am thankful that I reached the hospital in time and religiously take my statin and aspirin. Not sure what else to do but trust God that He will take care of me. Thanks again.
9
I had a heart attack (HA) at 57 and, as in your case, it changed my life. I still remember when, after about a week, I went to buy some food in a big Supermarket. It felt as if I was looking at everything through a mirror. And I thought: "look, I could be dead and this is how things would be: unchanged, moving along, utterly unaware of my absence". It was a huge shock. Mortality was not any longer an item to philosophize about, but a very close reality. And that, compounded with recovery, the drugs, the side effects of those, and the all too real fear of having another HA brought along a depressed state that stayed with me for a long time, and it still luring somewhere in the background.
I have a very sunny personality, but somehow that was not enough to put the event quickly behind me. I sometimes envy people who are capable to do so, some have posted a comment here. But here I am: once in a while questioning death and unsure about what to do with the new awareness of it.
23
@Davide
I had heart failure at 52. I experienced
the same thing as you--like looking at things and thinking--it'll all just go on without me. In my case, I was watching my family on one side of the room. They'd go on without me. It was an epiphany. And I empathize with you.
4
What a story. We humans love to hear stories, as we can relate to them in more ways than one. Years ago (early 70's), during my residency, I had a 38 yo male patient admitted with a heart attack. Somehow, being incapacitated at least for a certain time, and concerned of not being able to feed his family, committed suicide (a gunshot in his mouth), a most tragic occurrence we failed to grasp, the awful price of depression...when left untreated.
8
"I was a mostly healthy former high school and college athlete. I don’t smoke or have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes or a family history of heart disease or early death. Yearly checkups with my doctor never included any mention of heart disease. So I never considered worrying."
What's missing in all this is one other factor to be taken into account: luck. You were unlucky enough, Mr. Lee, to have the heart attack to begin with. You were lucky enough to have survived, reached the hospital and receive treatment.
I wish you and your wife many long happy years together in good health with luck.
14
A superb graphic by Eiko Ojala. And a beautifully written and touching essay by Trymaine Lee.
11
Ten years ago. I was 59. I wake up 2 am, with a slight tension in my chest. I thought I slept in the wrong position, but it didn't go away. At 7 am, I walked my Bloodhound, but this "tension" remained. I went to a gym regularly, I wasn't overweight and didn't smoke.
Fortunately, my father's side of the family was ridden with heart disease; every one of his eight siblings had some form of it, even his sisters. So I knew that you don't fool around with chest pain. I better have it looked at. Now. Even though it was a very mild pain, hardly pain at all.
I went to a local clinic in Chelsea. They did the standard tests, and couldn't find anything wrong. They said, "We can't do any more tests here with immediate results, so you can either go home and see what happens, or we could call 911 and take you to an ER where they can perform more tests." I chose the latter.
An hour later, I was lying in the ER at Bellevue Hospital, waiting for the blood work. A doctor came to me and said, "Your cardiac enzymes are elevated. You've had a heart attack."
Next morning I underwent cardiac catheterization, one stent was inserted, and I was home in two days.
I didn't know I wouldn't be returning when I went to the clinic, I had no arrangements for my dog. Before I had the angiogram, I phoned a friend who had two bulldogs, and asked him to walk and feed Nash.
Now I'm on Lipitor and aspirin. No symptoms since then. I work out and run. I feel lucky to be alive.
NEVER IGNORE CHEST PAIN.
91
Thank you for sharing your story and your struggles. Thank you.
9
This really resonated with me. I had a heart attack about six months ago at the age of 37. It doesn't help that I wasn't treated properly until my third hospital visit. On visit one, the ER doc said I had a heart attack, the cardiology nurse practitioner came to my room and told me they'd be doing a cardiac cath later that morning to look for blockages...and then the attending cardiologist canceled the cath because my cardiac echo was normal and if I'd "really had a heart attack, we'd see dead tissue on the echo." I was sent home; two weeks later, I went to a different hospital. No heart attack this time, but my stress test showed heart damage, so they admitted me. Once again, I was prepped for a cath...and then the attending cardiologist canceled it. Finally, about 10 days after that, I ended up in the hospital with chest pain a third time. This time, they did the cath, and they found two blockages: my LAD has an 80% lesion that can't be stented due to its location, and another artery is 100% blocked. I told them time and time again that my father had his first heart attack at 38, has had a total of three attacks, and has never had an abnormal EKG or echo despite the fact that he's had five stented blockages. I don't have high cholesterol, don't eat red meat or cured meats, don't smoke, eat pretty well, etc. But if you can't convince the doctors to do something for you, all the knowledge in the world doesn't help.
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@BJPMChew
This is malpractice. But not just by physicians. The Private Health Insurance Industry puts intense stress on hospitals and physicians. All providers have to fight to get paid. The cost of dealing with multiple insurance companies, each dedicated to profit instead of health is very very costly: lots of office personnel fight the insurance companies every day. Doctors and Hospitals have to work faster and faster and longer and longer to pay the back office personnel.
Every diagnosis and every treatment is challenged by private health insurance. We need universal health care with the nation as a risk pool, not just for Americans who can't afford insurance, but for all Americans who are dealing with a stressed and broken system. Twenty years ago, every little chest pain would have been taken seriously and admitted to hospital for a clear diagnosis.
But profit motives always crowd out safety and function in every industry (including nuclear power, unfortunately).
Now, you should cultivate a retired physician friend to help you navigate the system. I've done this for friends and I have doctor friends who have done this for their friends.
Insist on good care: Demonstrate to any doc that you have done your homework. I promise you, that if you show up with knowledge they will listen.
25
@memosyneOn the recommendation of a physician I scheduled catheterization two years ago. Based on results from other testing, the cardiologist said catheterization wasn't justified, "lose a little weight and get some more exercise." (I had run five marathons after age 50, curtailed by hip replacement.) In September I was back again, with difficulty breathing. Catheterization showed five arteries blocked from 90-100%. My bypass surgery was performed in the same hospital where my father had bypass surgery 30 years ago. Several lessons there. Thanks again, memosyne.
13
Family history is enormously useful and if any cardiac issues have ever arisen, find a competent diagnostic cardiologist at any age. And, if, as I am, you are a large though athletic guy turning 70, head to the same kind of doc. In cities of any size, you can have coronary artery scans, sometimes for as little as $100; you can have nuclear treadmill stress tests, complete ultrasound checks of carotid arteries, abdominal aorta and ankle/wrist BP analysis; as well as ECGs and very smart, focused interviews by a skilled cardiologist. Mine was a workout buddy from our gym who turned out to be one of the top guys in our community that includes a fine medical school. Just don't avoid the testing, do it. Use any prescribed medications faithfully and buy a BP/heart rate monitor for less than a $100 at any chain pharmacy. Self-knowledge is enormously useful in saving a life (review that construct).
13
I had my heart attack a few months or so before my 66th birthday in 2016 on Cinco de Mayo. I was doing some errands and came home for lunch. I felt tired and decided to lie down for a nap. I broke out into a cold sweat and felt extremely off. I was in no pain, however. I called 911 and the ambulance came quickly.
As soon as I got there, a cardiologist came it and told me that it was a massive heart attack. I could barely believe him but he explained that my artery was 100% blocked. (I later found it was nicknamed "the widowmaker". He also told me that that hospital was not equipped to do the procedure and they would have to send me to Westchester Medical Center. I asked if there was time and he said yes.
They took me right into their cath lab and they put in a stent and the doctor who di the procedure is now them my trusted cardiologist.
The irony of this was that I had a physical with EKG only a month before which showed nothing. Even this year I had two friends who ignored the symptoms went on with their lives and died doing so. I think there has to be more education on the various forms that heart disease takes. I could easily have been one of those people who ignored it. I was extremely lucky.
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@Jim Garber I know everybody is a bit different but there are certain things that contribute to a higher probability of cardiac events: blood pressure; family history; weight (especially around the middle); smoking; stress; inactivity; age; gender. And what's good or bad for the heart also can affect the brain.
3
@R. Anderson, is there any indication Mr Garber doesn't know that or is looking for over the counter advice?
4
You have a strong heart, meta- and physically. Good on ya, mate. Mindfullness and gratitude serves you well.
17
Sixteen years ago I had my cardiac arrest at 47 with two boys under 3 years old and just started a new job (in a contract position). After the stent was installed and a week of rest, I went back to work. My main thoughts were, “Thank God I dodged that bullet.” and moved on. Whining wasn’t an option.
6
@Bobby Nevola: Well, that wasn’t helpful.
2
The illustrations on this article are incredible. Thank you NYTimes for sponsoring such great art.
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Thank your for the article. Try EMDR or Brainspotting to process the trauma. It really works. There are psychotherapists in your area trained in both techniques
4
A marvelous account, harrowing and gripping and in the end quite moving. Wonderfully told, thank you.
Kudos too to the artist who made the animated graphic at the top.
15
17 years ago I had a heart attack just after turning 37 and had a stent placed. I too was thin, and exercised and ran 3 miles regularly. I have heart disease in my family, so I was told that it was genetic. Perhaps so, but I wanted to guarantee that I would not have another, and I refused to believe genetics was destiny. Environment and action also matter. I took up yoga and meditation to reduce stress, ate healthier, continued exercising, and took my meds – a statin, beta blocker, and aspirin.
I also started taking high doses of vitamin C and lysine, as recommended by Linus Pauling and Matthias Rath in their “Unified Theory of Human Cardiovascular Disease.” This theory is controversial, but it has kept me heart attack and chest pain free for 17 years. Briefly stated, cholesterol is not a villain, but the body uses cholesterol to repair microscopic leakages in arteries caused by “subclinical scurvy” caused by weak arterial walls caused by improperly formed collagen caused by insufficient Vitamin C. Over many years, repair after repair builds plaques which lead to heart attacks. With sufficient Vitamin C (8000 mg/day for me), arterial walls stay in good shape and do not form plaques regardless of your cholesterol level. Lysine (4000 mg/day) strips off existing plaques. This theory has never been adequately tested and is often viciously attacked, but a stress echo test last year shows my heart in fine shape, as if I never had a heart attack. Test the theory!
9
@Ben H.
Vitamin C taken orally, not through food, in large amounts, can cause kidney stones in those with a genetic tendency to calcium stones. The C binds to calcium. I have a genetic history of calcium stones (grandmother, father, brother) and I got my so far only calcium stone in 1987, when I was taking large amounts of C. I eat foods rich in C but have since stayed away from any supplement that has more than the RDA...not because I believe the RDA....but because I know what large amounts of supplemental C can do to me. I'm stone free since then. I'm glad C works for you, but it doesn't for everyone. I did test it. Anyone who has ever experienced a kidney stone doesn't want to do it again.
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@Madrid
Agreed. Vitamin C is not a panacea, but it can be very effective for those who can tolerate it. Anyone with medical conditions contraindicating large doses of Vitamin C should consult their doctor before trying this. Most doctors, including mine, will say Vitamin C supplementation results in expensive urine, but is generally harmless.
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@Ben H.
This is very very interesting. I've taken Vitamin C for 50 years and so far no cardiac disease. I'll look up arterial disease in scurvy. Thank you.
1
Thx for telling your story. It's a great reminder that tomorrow isn't promised to any of us, young or old.
15
I've never had a heart attack but I did have a GI bleed over 20 years ago. Luckily, I was with friends who took me to the hospital else I would have died from internal bleeding. Although I recall the episode very clearly, my "near death" experience gave me a new appreciation of life and the realization that life is, indeed, a gift that can be taken away very quickly from any of us. So, I try to live as fully as I can each and every day, and have gratitude for my one very precious life.
17
I am glad to see that this article at least mentions the importance of exercise and a healthy diet. However, this mention comes rather late in the article, and does not come with any helpful details about how to exercise or eat right. Nor does it explicitly state that exercise and diet can usually prevent a heart attack.
Yes, having a heart attack is traumatic, both for the victim, if they survive, and for their loved ones. This is all the more reason that an article like this one should delve a little deeper into the amount of exercise and the kind of diet that is needed to prevent a heart attack.
I highly recommend a plant-based diet heavy in fruits and vegetables. See Dr. Michael Greger's excellent book, "How Not to Die," for more details.
32
This just isn't true. Fifteen years ago, I lost 60 lbs and have kept it off by eating a clean clean diet. I have had normal cholesterol and low blood pressure for over a decade. Healthy BMI of 23. And I had a heart attack six months ago. 99% blockage in my circumflex artery. At age 53.
I don't even have a family history. My doctor said "It's just really bad luck".
8
I must say I’ve never experienced such psychological or mental trauma (not sure what he right word is) despite having two near death experiences, first pulmonary embolisms and then 90% blockage in widow maker leading to stent, both before age 50. However I do thank my truly lucky stars and am much more cognizant of literally being alive. I think I simply am unable to comprehend the reality of having avoided death for no apparent reason. Like others though I am much more present than ever before, and yet, as an avid cyclist have every intention of living to 100. That being said, as the old saying goes, “you can’t take it with you” so enjoy today and leave work at work.
12
Getting a heart attack at 38 is not normal. In some cultures the rate of heart attack incidence is close to zero, even for people in their 50's and 60's. I wish the author had spent some time doing a 'failure analysis' of what went wrong. My model for what happens is that microcracks in the arteries act as nucleation sites for plaque formation. These microcracks are caused by inflammatory factors such as smoke, highly refined carbohydrates, and fried foods. Eating lots of fruits and vegetables counters this inflammation.
14
@wilson hago,
Sadly, almost no cultures now have heart attack incidences of close to zero. Coronary artery disease is among the leading causes of death in China, Malaysia, Papua New Guinea and many parts of Africa, among other places.
Eating fruits and vegetables provides many health benefits, but even a diet heavily weighted towards plant-based foods cannot always overcome all predisposing heart disease factors, including genetic ones.
Your comment's tone seems to suggest that the author is to blame for the development of early CADz. There is no evidence to support this.
53
Thanks for your thoughtful response. Many of the comments about this wonderful story lead toward blaming this man for his own heart attack without really knowing the facts of his case. His story is about survival and it is complete without warnings about diet and exercise. There are a million other articles that provide warnings.
I (at 47 years old, non smoker, non drinker, vegan, runner) had a “widow maker” heart attack one morning while I was out running. Life is short people, don’t waste yours blaming people who are ill. It won’t make you immortal.
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@wilson hago
I have to agree with Michael, the other comment to your post. Yes some heart attacks are caused by people not eating fruits and vegetable. However.... and this pertains to the author, the cause of heart attacks can be a myriad of things. In his case it was genetic. Many people are quick to point the finger at the person saying, well it was your fault this your problem. You did not eat healthy and take care of yourself. Well what about the people who do take care of themselves and have a heart attack? Bob Harper, the. fitness coach, had a massive heart attack age 50. I find it interesting how some people are quick to blame, until it happens to them... It's the 'not me' mentality. 'I took care of myself so I am safe'. 'I am not one of them'. And I see a lot of, "Why should I pay for YOUR healthcare? I worked hard for my money and I took care of myself, so I shouldn't pay for your laziness". Again... until it happens to them. This is very conservative thinking about healthcare in general. Let me tell you, heart attacks and kidney failure can happen to ANYONE at any time! How about we make it standard practice to screen for these things during everyones annual physical. Yes annual. We as Americans need to have higher standards in prevention and treatment. Healthcare, not emergency care. I am not trying to bash on your comment, I am pointing out the mentality we need to avoid and stop pointing the finger, victim blaming, and not solving the problem.
2
What I find re a most teachable lesson here re the most recommended posts is that when you deal with a traumatic event like this, there is no rationalization, intellectualization, finger pointing, ax grinding, bait and switching, cherry picking, horn blowing, partisanship etc.
There is just a pure, stark recap of what happened and a true desire to teach/help others in an objective way.
46
One of the saddest patients I ever knew lived for 40 years with heart disease, or so he would have you believe. In fact, when he ultimately came to the cardiac cath lab, he was found to have completely NORMAL coronary blood flow and normal cardiac muscle function. He problem was ultimately psychological, somatization disorder, which is also disabling in its own way.
Another patient I met on a home visit did have a real problem, called cystic medial necrosis, where the elastic tissue in the major blood vessels break down and result in aneurysms and the potential for immediate death. One year earlier, he had undergone major surgery replacing his aorta and its major branches all the way down to his groin. He had the distinction of having the longest surgical incision in the history of my major medical school hospital. He spent the year after surgery virtually lying still and enlisting his family and caregivers to help him with absolutely everything. Upon examining him that day in his home, my stethoscope revealed the telltale murmur showing the extension of his primary disease into his carotid arteries. Basically, he was now ACTUALLY at risk of immediate death and he had wasted the bulk of the good year his surgeons had given him.
Diseases are real and have major consequences but their mental health effects are often overlooked and more intractable.
Thank you, Mr. Lee, for reminding us of the importance of this issue.
25
@Douglas McNeill
As a doctor, can you tell us how medical school and its ethics handle the mental aspects of chronic disease? Especially when it comes to such debilitating health problems such as heart attacks at a young age, kidney dialysis, transplants, gun shot wounds..? I myself can write a similar article based on kidney failure age 28 due to Fibromuscular Dysplasia (autoimmune). The effects; dialysis, a failed transplant, on a waiting list for 11 years in crowded California. The bureaucracy of for profit dialysis centers is enough to drive a person insane. PTSD, I am sure I have it from all of this, is another problem. I have lost over a DECADE of my 20's and 30's. Time lost in my career, job market, life. Unable to save for a retirement, house, emergency, car,... as SSDI pays $6.45hr full time. My PTSD is debilitating. Yet no doctor addresses the issue. It's like they are scared to address the real issue. Politics. Support groups by other patients do help. Patients actually know far more than any doctor or nurse. (Sorry!) But there is not enough support groups or time. We need specialized councillors in transplant/dialysis/heart attacks/and gunshot wounds, Personally I am not getting the help I need in dialysis, the social worker paid by Fresenius is worthless. As a doctor, what can be done to change this? How can we patients help you, to help us? What does the government need to change in its healthcare law to help treat people's mental health??
1
Thank you for this piece, and completely understand the PTSD. At 48 I suffered a massive brain hemorrhage. The “event” as I came to call it, was never far from my mind. Happy to report it does get better with time - 8 yrs on I no longer dwell on it daily, and now feel it gave me more of an appreciation for life. Best of health to you.
43
I did not have a heart attack, but my ailment crept up on me. An avid cyclist, I had trouble breathing. The trouble was a tumor. Thanks to a deviated septum, I noticed sooner. Was examined on Tuedsay, surgery Thursday. Tumor type and location so rare that Google did not find anything. Still clean after second surgery and high dose radiation. You never get over having been that close to the edge. I am now kinder to most people and I am far less hesitant to run away from rude, nasty, and or generally anoying people.
72
As another person with recent detection of a coronary blockage and subsequent stent placement, I share much in this piece: coming to terms with your mortality, frustration about experiencing so much fatigue, trying to clearly express your love to family and friends.
As a physician, I feel obliged to point out that the "widow maker" lesion refers to a blockage in the left main coronary artery, not the LAD.
It is a remarkable thing to come close to death and to know that another cardiac event, perhaps a lethal one, might be just around the corner. In some ways, it's been a positive experience, helping me to focus on what is really important.
Carpe diem.
12
@Michael, you should Google widowmaker. Almost every site refers to the widowmaker as occurring in the LAD, though WebMD says it also can be the left main artery. I had a heart attack at 48, with same type of blockage this writer had, in my LAD, and was told by physicians it was widowmaker.
1
@Diane,
Noted. Thanks for the correction. In my cardiovascular disease work, widow maker was used to describe blockages in the left main.
The left main coronary artery gives rise to both the LAD and the circumflex. It is the origin of the LAD and usually supplies almost all the blood to the left ventricle.
Actually the widow maker usually refers to proximal LAD. Of course, a left main lesion can obviously be a widow maker too...
What a powerful account and fearsome reminder of how much in life we can neither predict nor control.
You may never be able to let go of the trauma from your brush with death, but I hope that you will also never be able to let go of appreciating your ultimate good fortune that you can tell the story.
9
I had a similar experience at 43, a married father of 7-year old twins. Like you, mine also came out of the blue. After arriving at Cedars-Sinai ER via the LAFD, my wife handed me the phone. I told my kids, who had been hurriedly foisted on friends, I loved them. I said it with intensity, trying to burn it into them, as if that is possible with a 7-year-old. I called my parents back East to say the same and to say goodbye, possibly.
I was fortunate to enroll in the Ornish program. Its group therapy with other survivors and its stress-management (yoga and meditation) was like triage on my emotions. Like you, not a day had gone by that I didn't wonder if I would die - horrible bird's-eye pictures in my mind of lying dead in various places, only to be discovered by my wife, or worse, my kids. I still feel like Damocle's sword hangs over my head. But four years later, it's less visceral.
The ICU nurses and attending physicians all told me how lucky I as was. I didn't feel that way. I was angry. I felt singled out by the universe for unjust punishment. I was mad at my body for failing me.
Then, one evening while meditating, my hands were folded across my chest and I felt my heartbeat. It felt like a baby bird fluttering inside my chest, fragile, but determined. I said "thank you" to it. Thanks for withstanding my abuse and neglect. Thanks for fighting - for not dying that day. I promised it the love and care it had always shown me. That's when I began to heal.
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Thank you for your comment. It was really beautiful to me. And of the way meditation made you see your life’s condition differently. It’s a hopeful message!
19
@Ed Fontleroy Ed, I am glad you exist in this world. Thank you for writing and sharing your story. It is moving and beautiful!
13
@Ed Fontleroy What a beautiful and valuable insight you share here with us! Thank you. It has been my experience also that what at first seemed like my body's betrayal of me through a debilitating illness, showed itself in time to be a teaching--a hard lesson to be sure, but one that centered me, brought me home to my heart, showed me how to live with greater compassion and awareness... Often when we are unable to admit stress to consciousness, our body is compelled to be the messenger. And what an articulate messenger she is! Love your body by metabolizing your suffering. Meditation is the key. Prayer and meditation. If we don't suffer who we are, others must suffer it for us.
18
The PTSD from health events is real and awful and casts shadows over everything. It’s very hard to shake. Consider looking for a TIMBO yoga class— trauma-informed mind-body work. I found it incredibly helpful.
16
My father survived a severe heart attack in 2005. He died less than two months later when a driver went through a stop sign broadsiding his car.
None of us know when death will call. You are doing all the right things you can but most important, concentrating on enjoying the moments you have right now.
174
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) may be a therapy worth trying for those still suffering with mortal fear following a heart attack. I know it helped my 19 year old who developed PTSD from a very different, non-medical trauma.
18
Been there done that. Mine, at 58 was a gift from thirty years of NSAIDs- in spite of low cholesterol, it resulted in a quintuple bypass after three heart attacks, all experienced without health insurance. Ten years, before during a treadmill test, the attending cardiologist said and I quote : “you can worry about anything you want, but don’t bother to worry about your heart, you have the heart of a racehorse “.
That’s why they call it practicing medicine...
Every day is a gift.
10
The truth is that we are all mortal beings - and any of us could die at any time for a myriad of causes (of course there being a statistical element to the likelihood). To me, it appears that US mass culture - which employs the word "pass" often in place of the word "die" - is focused on persuading us in large part to ignore our own mortality and the brevity of life, and expend our time and energy on ephemera - consumerism and the entertainment and image industry, and attendant superficial self-promotion.
As many novelist, poets and philosophers have noted over the centuries, life itself is uncertain, and the key question is what each of us does with our unknown span of time on this Earth. ...
44
@William M. Palmer, Esq. A couple thoughts on reading your fine response to Mr. Lee's life-changing medical event.
Why do so many fear the word "die" and replace it with "pass"? It is as natural a process as the word "live" and every living organism will experience it. When I hear a report of a friend or relative "passing", I want to gently tell the reporter that "passing" is what you do on the freeway. "Dying" is what you do at the end of your time on this earth and there need be no fear or reluctance in saying the word. One of our beloved poets you referred to said it best - Mary Oliver who herself died this past week.
"Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
With your one wild and precious life?"
3
I hope Mr. Lee has been evaluated to be sure he doesn't have potentially dangerous arrhythmias due to the mix of heart muscle and scar that develops after a heart attack. That episode of syncope could have been a transient episode of an arrhythmia, not what's called orthostatic hypotension.
24
At the young age of 41 I returned from lunch, walked to the second floor to my office and was out of breath. I sat in my office and had a cold sweat that went away. That night, the symptoms repeated and I went to the hospital where they did an EKG and immediately inserted 3 IVs before admitting me! The next day I had a heart cath and the next day a successful ballooning of the LAD. It was extremely depressing to think how close I came to death and it was even more depressing to go to the Cardiologist and sit in the waiting room with a lot of old people who had bags of medications with them! Was this now my lot in life? Fortunately, I changed my diet, started exercising, and it has been 30+ years since the cardiac incident. I am thankful for the job the doctors did and for the added time I have had with my family including 3 wonderful grandchildren.
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@EDH As a victim at 43, now 48, few things make me happier than reading statements like "30+ years [later]." Thanks for posting.
6
Aww, this made me cry. I can relate to the fleetingness of life and the pain & vulnerability we all feel at times. Alas you were meant to be here and carry on & thanks for writing this.
35
A beautifully written piece about a frightening life-changing event, and a cautionary tale for those who take its lessons. For the author, this meritorious sharing of the event and its aftermath, cathartic in itself, will earn him the unspoken empathy and gratitude of a wide readership.
36
Thank-you for this beautiful essay. Good luck to you, sounds like you are doing great.
13
I've learned to appreciate each day & moments at a time since my event 16 years. Stress is a major factor, we tend to ignore. Don't feel sorry &
"Live like you are dying"
There are many of us with similar experience & here to help.
12
@Mahesh
Stress IS a major factor, and it is so often overlooked / discounted.
9
"The practitioner there did an electrocardiogram and said the left side of my heart was slightly enlarged, but my discomfort was probably just gas." Practitioner or physician? The former most likely. This is a medical malpractice case.
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@JCX
Same thing happened to my father - given a clean bill of health though he felt lousy and looked grey, had a massive heart attack shortly thereafter.
If someone tells me my heart is enlarged, I'm not going anywhere.
25
@JCX
I agree. An important lesson from his article: an electrocardiogram can confirm a myocardial infarction but IT CANNOT RULE OUT A MYOCARDIAL INFARCTION. This is why cardiac enzymes are needed to confirm the diagnosis.
17
@JC
Left-side heart erratic, enlarged heart -- classic signs of a potential "widow-maker."
Get a good M.D., watch stress levels, diet, exercise, take meds accurately, and "don't worry/be happy." As in, why possibly let your last thought, be an unhappy one?
2
Living with multiple ongoing medical conditions, my entire life. I have both been highly fortunate, and victim of sudden medical issues, that have altered the course of my once, happy young adult life.
I have always been grateful for the life that good medical care afforded me.
Yet, growing older, and experiencing near catastrophic medical problems, along the way to middle age, I can totally relate to the subject of your article. Fortunately, our hero had the support of a significant other, which is not only important for obvious reasons, it is statistically crucial for better health outcomes. I most certainly wish him well.
But, for many middle age folks, like me, who are highly educated, but must endure chronic medical problems, which can lead to far more greater issues, as we age (strokes, heart attacks ect.), fending off a war against your own faculties, and doing it alone, is extremely scary.
I’m glad you published this piece. Things like this happen a lot in our society. As humans, it’s understandable that we, at some level, must sublimate this realty, to function in the present. We couldn’t survive if we didn’t.
On the other hand, it’s a great public service, to be able to talk about the unthinkable before it’s too late. On behalf of an aging, ailing population, I thank you for your service.
I also thank you for the reminder, that disaster can, and often does strike, without warning, to not just the aging and sick, but to people of all ages.
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I wish you had included in this story, the advice to take one/ two aspirin if one suspects a heart attack., as one calls the ambulance. (BTW heart attacks can also go nearly unnoticed as happened to my MD father. The pain was in the "wrong" arm... and he ignored it. He died about 14 months later (age 76).)
Heart attacks, strokes can occur at "early" ages. (I've known this since I was ten, and a neighbor's mom had a paralyzing stroke.)
Apparently, there can be "obsessions" pre-death -- is that when you were talking about where you didn't want to be buried?? (A friend (86) who recently died, spoke a lot about having finished this course/campaign?.... and that it was time to move on. She suddenly died, probably of a stroke, within 24 hours of leaving the nursing home!!)
Be kind.
12
@Make America Sane It
It's true that symptoms can be misleading. I was out on a club bike ride, my most distressing 'symptom' was not being able to keep up with people I'd rode with for years so I packed in early and went home. The next day I had a mild ache in my chest; the day after that I went to the ER just in case. I'd had a heart attack and was completely unaware of it and that night was having a stent installed. My brother died of a heart attack at the age of 56.
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@Make America Sane - You must chew the aspirin, not swallow it whole. Should be non-coated adult aspirin (not baby aspirin -- 81 mg -- that people take daily for preventative heart health).
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@Make America Sane
325 milligram aspirin tablets -- advice to chew or crunch will speed up its absorption into the system.
If it's the 81 mg. tablets definitely chew the tablets and take four to eight!
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I only have one suggestion to those who have similar symptoms. Never, ever drive yourself to the hospital particularly with your family in the car.
Call 911 and wait for the ambulance. The EMTs are trained and have the equipment on hand to try to start your heart if it stops.
If you pass out in the car your family and other people on the road are at risk and there is no one around that has a chance of saving you.
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He wasn’t driving himself to the hospital with his family in the car. The scene in the car happened later after the event.
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@Edward Blau
Hey, there's a lot of debate about this. Some advocate any taxi-cab to the hospital, as it is unknown if EMTs are already on a call.
Just go. Now. STAT.
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@Urko
Whatever you do for transportation, call 911 *immediately* the first instant you or someone around you has symptoms. The dispatcher will activate the cardiac team at the local hospital at once. If you go to the ER without that call, that process won't begin until you see the triage nurse. The hospital staff you need are not necessarily all just sitting around in the hospital waiting for you--they may be out golfing, having dinner or sleeping soundly. That can be a lot of lost precious time.
I know this from my own experience with the same kind of heart attack, also out of the blue and unexpected, with seemingly no risk factors. I had no idea how the system worked, and I was very lucky to have been home alone when it happened, or I would have had someone drive me to the hospital, and would likely not be here to make this comment.
And whatever else you do, please oh please do NOT delay that call for help out of embarrassment!
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I am twice as old as you and, yes, being older makes suffering a heart attack much easier. I have had a good and full life; loving parents, good education, 53 year marriage, 2 wonderful kids and now grandkids and a lot of travel. I had never had heart symptoms but at 77 I thought if there was anything I had wanted to do in my life, I had better do it. So in September I took a 34 day cruise to the South Pacific, a place I had never been, and I loved it. But, ironically, on the last day of the cruise I had the heart event, in Tahiti. Fortunately, I made it home and was treated with 4 by-passes.
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Thank you, Mr. Lee, for sharing your story. Let me be the first to say that I am glad you are still with us and sharing your stories. In addition, you have done a service to many people today. Godspeed, sir.
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My LAD let me down too, 10 years ago now, and I have been fine. So much of this is statistical randomness. You are not destined for an early demise. I have learned a few things that are true:
1. I am sure you are getting good advice to Exercise Every Day foreswear tobacco for ever, and take all your meds Every Day. Every day. The data on these things is profoundly strong.
2. Dietary advice is uncertain, but anecdotal and limited clinical trials suggest benefits to a vegan diet or the Mediterranean diet. A vegan diet is better for your overall health than a typical diet, and better for the world too---worth a go IMO.
3. This can be an opportunity to deepen the connections to your friends and loved ones---it seems like you are taking this by writing. There is a tendency to hide your trauma away because as men in this competitive world, we do not want others to see us as damaged goods. I do not wear my experience on my sleeve, but neither do I hide it away---I discovered that my friends and colleagues cared for me more than I had suspected. Your experience will touch them, and in a good way.
4. Yeah, it shook me up, but the fear will diminished and left me loving my wife, my family, my work, my students and life itself even more.
Good Luck and Best Wishes from a Fellow Traveller.
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@Scott Couldn't agree more. It's now exactly 30 years since my heart attack at age 42. First months of rehab very tough, but wife, infant daughter, great friends, colleagues and medicos helped carry me along until back up and going again. Entire family went on Mediterranean diet (delicious - what's not to like?), have taken meds religiously every day, exercise and everything else.
My father died of a heart attack at the same age, so I know how fortunate I am: the thought of what might have happened, or of my end *whenever* it comes, is never very far away. I am grateful for every day and know all too well that life is a gift.
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Very very good advice.
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My only experience with near death is being ejected from a rollover and nearly mashed by a vehicle passing over me. I experienced none of these writers' traumatic feelings because I "function as if it never happened". The comparable feelings to what these authors describe occur while writing my last will and testament. It's not fear but melancholic nostalgia imagining missing the many shared experiences with my surviving loved ones by being dead. Isn't that just the human condition?
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Even though I'm almost twice your age, your message resonates - acknowledge your fears and hopes and mortality and live your life wholly and fully. I hope you live long and prosper, with your caring wife and child alongside you.
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At 38 I had a major stroke, one that left my right leg and arm motionless, and slurred my speech.
The day before I had run around Prospect Lake twice, about 7 miles.
I hadn't smoked in 10 years, was a moderate drinker, ate properly and wasn't overweight.
A few months later I had brain surgery to remove another area that might bleed. (Don't ask me for details, Im an engineer not a brain surgeon).
That was in 1985.
In the last 10 years or so right side deficits have led to joint problems, but I'm reasonably active at 71.
I do participate in a Stroke Club, sponsored by a local rehab Hospital; Helen Hays.
There is life after these events.
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Glad for Mr. Lee. This reminded me of the late Tim Russert, who was the moderator of NBC's "Meet The Press." I believe his case was a "widow-maker," lower-left part of heart that unexpectedly fails suddenly and rapidly. He was in his office, and was gone within 10 minutes. Good insurance, good location -- not enough.
Every day is important. Managing workload, diet, exercise, and life is important. Seriously.
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@ntsc
Thank you. I'm 46, just diagnosed with breast cancer. It's good to know that there are things to look forward to.
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@ntsc
My late aunt lived to be 96 years old before succumbing to two types of cancer.
When asked to explain the secret of her longevity she said " She picked the right parents" Her father lived to be 84 and her mother was 93.
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If had heart failure at 52. They had to resuscitate me. It's been three years. This piece was very helpful for me. Thank you.
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My husband had the exact same storyline as you at 49 years old. He is 55 now and is forever traumatized. Always thinking about dying. I wish he knew a group for support. Any tips of where to look is appreciated.
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@Rebecca
You might check local hospitals for support groups. I belong to a stroke club at Helen Hays in New York, and there is no requirement of being or having been their patient.
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The Ornish Program, named after cardiologist Dean Ornish is available at many hospitals and many insurers cover it. Ask your hospital if they or another hospital offers it. Even if your husband doesn’t stick with the very severe diet regiment, the monitored exercise (to regain confidence), group therapy and stress management components are invaluable. I am so thankful I discovered it after my event at 43.
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@Rebecca
Perhaps your Father would consider therapy with an appropriate therapist. It's not clear, if your Father is wrought with fear of death? There are many books that explore and reflect on our mortality and the truth of death and embracing this true as a means to deepen, enrich and broaden our lives into fullness of living. In short, allowing death in, as truth of living. Much as this Mr. Lee's story of living with such traumatic illness unfolding into love of living.
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