I feel like i dont give enough credit to myself because i pay attention more in what i have not succeed in. When soomeone else gives me compliments, that is when i begin to noticing the good things i had acomplishd.
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I personally believe that only the jerks brag about their success. Don’t get me wrong; it’s okay to pat yourself on the back every now and then, but to continuously brag about about everything you do right is egotistical, arrogant, and selfish. Ones bragging can offend others, and it’ll be easy to downplay your peers. For example; if a student goes bragging about their straight A’s, it’ll be hard for another student looking in to stay motivated.
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Some's success could be considered failure to others, I believe that's the exact reason why we don't give ourselves enough credit. In the world today it's a lot easier to compare yourself to others current selves than to your past self.
Other times your past self has done so good at a certain thing it makes perfection almost necessary, with no celebratory means. Melody Wilding sums it up perfectly saying “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value.” Everyone has that one thing that they do so well they don't ever stop to acknowledge their skill of the certain task, the only time they would ever acknowledge something would be if it was negative.
Knowing that you can do better is never bad, there is no such thing as perfection, but that doesn't mean you have to undermine anything but perfection. Its always good to give yourself credit where deserved.
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"Despite that awkwardness, getting credit for your own work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more." I really admire this quote because it shows that even though getting credit for your work can make you feel like your the center of attention sometimes you need that attention to strive successfully. In my case, I like to know when people like my work and if they do I would own it.
I usually never like to boast about my work or take a whole bunch of credit for it unless I feel really proud of myself. It will boost my confidence if I am proud of what I am doing. However, I will not take anything for granted. Moments to praise my own work are valuable and they shouldn't just be something you can do on the daily.
Overall taking credit for you work and being proud of it is a great thing and everyone should apply it to their lives, but only at the right times. Only when you know you should be earning your credit for it.
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“Research shows that meaningful praise can... boost motivation and performance” This is something that my parents live by. They have always been afraid of me not having enough faith in myself; so much so that they lead me right to it. They never stop telling me how great I did during a lacrosse game or how beautifully I danced at a dance competition, but in reality I sat on the bench during the game and I made a bunch of mistakes in my routine. It has gotten to the point where I don’t know whether they are giving me a genuine compliment or if they’re just trying to make me feel better about myself. I eventually told them to stop giving me compliments because I don’t deserve them and it’s true, I don’t. I never do anything worth mentioning because I don’t work hard enough.
When I got picked for “The New York Times” weekly picks, I was really proud of myself for writing a reply that was noticeable. However, when my friend who also submitted an article found out, she told me that “it’s not that hard to make it” and that anyone could do it if they tried. And then the next week she got picked. This made me realize that I still hadn’t done any recognizable action and was just as good, if not worse, than everyone else.
I don’t have any talent that I’m taking for granted, and everything that does come naturally to me isn’t even halfway decent. So, I will continue to stay without compliments purely for the knowledge that I am not trying to be someone other, or better than myself.
Success is expected. When we meet what is expected, there is no huge celebration. And if the expectations are so high, straight A’s for example, how can you exceed them? Many students focus more on their failures than for their successes. In my family, the expectation is to do your best, which is a healthy expectation, but it also leaves room for failure. When you fail, it feels like you are disappointing not only yourself, but other people close to you. Generally, students are their own worst critic. We always want to be better, we always CAN be better. Striving for excellence is a good thing, yet when we do not recognize achieving excellence with the same attention as the failure it loses its significance.
Personally, I give myself less credit for school successes than for extracurricular successes. I take dance classes and successes there are celebrated. You feel proud of yourself. These tiny victories mean a lot more than getting an A in school. “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value,” said Melody Wilding. Successes in dance mean more because I have more emotional connection with dance; I choose to spend hours at the studio because it provides the right amount of challenge, enjoyment, and mental and physical stimulation. Successes there feel more special. Stepping back and telling yourself that what seems like an insignificant success should be celebrated just as much as other successes, would be beneficial for everyone.
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In life, we don’t give ourselves enough credit for what we do accomplish. We naturally think about our mistakes, because we keep going back and thinking about what we could’ve done instead. But if you really take a moment and think, there are much more things that we do succeed in than fail. I think we think less about our accomplishments partially because we don’t want to celebrate too much and act arrogant. It’s okay to give yourself a pat on the back and tell yourself you did good. I do think that it feels good when somebody compliments you or tells you, “Nice work!” or, “Way to go!” It gives you a little more reassurance and probably improves your mood. In the article, “How to Accept a Compliment — Even If it’s From Yourself,” by Micaela Marini Higgs, it tells us about accepting compliments and what they do for us. For example, “Despite that awkwardness, getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more. Companies use praise to try to boost productivity and even revenue, and experts say that the psychological impact of keeping a positive view of your accomplishments can decrease stress and encourage better habits.”(Higgs, par. 2) Compliments motivate people to try harder, work harder and they make you feel good. If we talked about successes, our brains might not think about failure so much. Even writing down a few small acccomplishments can make a difference. You’re more successful than you think.
When I do something good like get all A’s or get a good grade on a test I usually don’t give myself credit. I’m used to getting good grades it’s kinda just natural for me. I don’t give myself credit because most of the time I know I am going to do good wether I study or not. If I for example win the triple A baseball playoffs I will give myself credit because I was good at something different. Also with getting my black belt or when I was little learning to swim. So when I do a lot of good schoolwork I don’t give myslef enough praise. But for example if I get a grade lower than a B- I will freak out. I feel like I am a failure and beat myself up about it. A month ago I got a D+ on a test and i was not myself. When I came home I felt like a failure and went into my room. Now that I am writing this article I feel that maybe I should appreciate my good grades and celebrate them. Maybe now I should feel more accomplished because right now I have all A’s. I usually say when I get an A or B “ yes I did good.”. That’s really the only praise i give myself. So now if you are reading this article right now listen to me.We need to appreciate ourselves more and I think that now I need to appreciate myself more.
Sincerely, William Sousa 8th Grader at Beverly Middle School
When I’m asked if I give myself enough credit for my achievements, I have to stop and think. There are a lot of people who put in work, so that I can achieve my goals. Props to them. They get loads of credit, but when I do make an achievement, I probably don’t give myself a lot of credit. I feel as though I’ve done a ton of work to get where I am. I do feel accomplished when I do something that I’ve worked towards. On the other hand, when I fail at something, I blame myself completely for the loss of a big game, or a bad grade on a test. I give myself the wrong type of credit, a put down sort of credit. This type of credit is the type that makes people quit jobs, or flunk a class in school. So instead of quitting, this failure pushes me to do better in everything that I do. So when I don’t give myself credit, i guess that means I want to do better.
@Ryan Lovasco props to them
The article ask “Do you quietly move on?” and I have never really thought about how I celebrate my own success until I saw this question. I have a lot of self accomplishments like making a good grade on a test and making a good play in lacrosse. But when I do make a good play in lacrosse I am humble about, I think it’s because I like to keep to myself on the lacrosse field. Other people can see that I have made a good play and acknowledge it but I ignore it when they do. I know that I have made a good play and I am happy that I did but I just move on from the play and worry about the next one. “But even if you’re bad at taking a compliment, or you’re not getting external recognition, you can still enjoy major psychological benefits from celebrating your achievements on your own,” Dr. Teresa said in the article. I can relate to this because I do feel good when I celebrate my success to myself.
When I’m not successful in a class or on the field it is a completely different story. If I make a bad play on the field I think about it all day and figure out what I should have done and it is impossible for me to move on from it.
I definitely do not give myself enough, or even any, credit for my own successes. The failures and negative aspects flood my mind and overpower any positive accomplishments. Personally I think that through my poor mental health my brain has essentially trained itself to think everything into something negative. From time to time I do think about the small accomplishments I’ve made through my day, and I notice that when I track my small successes it “can decrease stress and encourage better habits” (Engle,2018,para. 4). Those small successes show that it is possible to have even the slightest bit of positivity in my day. I do believe that keeping a daily list or journal would help immensely. The journaling can “improve your intrinsic motivation, productivity, creativity and mood” (Engle,2018,para. 19). Then, in turn, I would be able to look back on it and recognize that there is a light somewhere. You just have to get past the negatives. I do try to journal when I am feeling down. Writing down the negatives helps me as well because you can get those thoughts out of your head and down onto paper. I agree with Engle’s article that writing down your achievements can help you.
I do not think that I give myself much credit for my successes. Some accomplishments invoke a feeling of pride in myself if it is a large or difficult task. However, I rarely take pride in the small things I achieve, like a good score on a test or piece of writing. I might feel slightly proud for a few minutes, or maybe hours, but it is a fleeting sense of success. I am much more likely to dwell on my shortcomings. I believe that success is considered standard. As a result, being successful is average and not special. It is considered given that one will succeed. On the contrary, failing is akin to a sin. There is a very negative stigma around failing, and as a result, it invokes much more thought. If I feel like I might have failed something, I think about it for days, if not weeks or months. For a similar reason, I do not receive compliments well. When someone compliments me, I feel like I do not deserve their praise. It makes me feel very awkward and I try to brush it off and move on to a different topic.
In short, I believe the negativity associated with failure and the idea that success is the standard has created, for me, a mindset where I focus way too much on my failure and not on my accomplishments.
I think that most of the time I do give myself enough credit for the things I do, but sometimes, not so much. I don't like to draw attention to myself, and showing people that I get the credit for something draws attention. I will announce my credit if its not a very big deal, like if I did an assignment or not. But if I do some art or write something, then I don't really like people acknowledging me for it.
I think that if it is a big accomplishment I give myself credit but if it is an A on a test probably not because there is probably something I could work on. I do thing I dwell on my failures more than my accomplishment because It you fail at something it could haunt you your whole life. I thing when others give me compliments I tell them thank you and normally take them. It that situation it is refreshing to here sometimes especially when your down. Giving someone else a compliment makes you just as happy I feel like because you know you just made someones day.
Personally I feel like I don’t give myself enough credit for my own successes because I tend to focus more on themyself do not give enough credit for my own successes because I feel like the best a most modest way to handle success is to be humble but confident. negative aspects to the situation that the positive. When I’m working on something, I tend to put myself through a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety because I overthink a lot. I think everyone focuses more on the little mistakes they make rather than the good ones.
No one really gives themselves enough credit for anything they do, I know I don’t. As I grew up I got the idea that being proud of yourself can also be bragging and make others feel bad. Now I don’t necessarily think that is true. You can tell someone what you did and why you’re proud of it and still be humble. The article says “Research shows that meaningful praise can measurably boost motivation and performance and can improve your brain’s ability to remember and repeat new skills.” Every once in a while when I get a good test grade or just do something overall I will talk to one of my parents about it and tell them how I feel. I think everyone focuses more on the little mistakes they make rather than the good ones.
Depending on the type of compliment I get I can either be very awkward or proud but humble. If someone tells me I’m pretty or my outfit is cute, that is when I get awkward. Of course I say thank you, I just think the fact that people notice how I look makes me feel awkward. Don’t take me wrong compliments are the sweetest thing, I’m just an awkward receiver.
I often forget to give myself credit for little successes: I expect to do good, so I overlook them. For example, I got a quiz back today in chemistry: I looked it, saw that I had gotten a 100, and simply put it away in my binder after only glancing at it. On the other hand, if I do really good on a big test or get all A’s for the nine weeks, I’m super proud of it and I tell my parents about it.
I was surprised by the reason for why we focus more on setbacks than achievements: our ancestors who worried a lot were more likely to survive and so "our brains are designed to look for problems." I agree that “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value” because we expect to do good, and when we don’t, we view it as failure.
Lastly, the article says to keep a daily list of your accomplishments. I think that I might try this sometime, and it’s funny because I learned the other day in psychology that keeping a daily list of the positive things that happened that day can help make your views more positive, which is basically the same thing as keeping a list of your accomplishments. After reading the article, I will try to give myself a pat on the back for even the small successes: “They don’t have to be big breakthroughs or huge successes. Even small wins can lead people to feel terrific.”
I feel that I definity don’t give myself enough credit for my successes because even if I do something good like get a good grade on a test or score a goal in a game I always find something that I could of done to make it better than it actually was. I feel that we as a society feel that perfection is something that should be done all the time and anything less than wasn't done well or doesn’t matter. It’s the same thing as you could get twenty compliments on your outfit but that one dislike from someone sticks with you the rest of the day and it’s like you have only received that mean comment and all of the good compliments you’ve gotten don’t matter anymore. This is why many people including me don’t take enough credit for there work or point out the things they did wrong right away before anyone else can.
I also don’t take much credit for things that I do because I feel that I don’t need to unlike keeping track of things I did wrong because I can grow from the things I did wrong and learn and change from them unlike my successes which I feel that once I've done them I don’t need to focus on what I did right but focus on what I did wrong so I can grow from that.
Personally, I never really gave myself credit for much. As said in the article, “Pumping yourself up after a big win can feel a little awkward. You want to acknowledge good work, but you don’t want to feel arrogant.” Even from a young age, I always felt like others would judge me and seem like I would be “showing off.” More than likely, you can see me thinking and being stuck on mistakes more than any accomplishments. When given accomplishments, I normally would brush them off. But with mistakes, I could be pondering them for days.
Depending on the when and where I receive compliments, predicts how I act act. During soccer, if I ever receive a compliment from my coach in front of the team, I stay very humble and try not to even smile. If the coach ever pulls me aside from the rest of the team, I of course smile and say thank you.
I am the kind of person to regularly compliment others, not for the compliment in return, but because I try my hardest to bring and help build others up. I don't compliment people just to say something, but when I do complement others, I truly mean what I say.
I feel like that sometimes I dont give myself enough credit for the things I do. I definitely dwell on my failures. Half the time I accept compliments depending on what they are given to. I know I don’t over receive praise I get it when needed. A recent achievement was passing my portfolio presentation, which is something required to pass in order to graduate my school. I have never been so worked up about something in my life and I ended up passing with flying colors. I feel like I should have celebrated more for that than what I did. I acknowledged my achievement by telling my parents and friends and sister that I passed.
I rarely ever give myself praise when I am successful. I just feel like sometimes, you can't always get credit for what you do. Even if it seems like you should. I don't know why you have to accept a compliment, that doesn't really make any sense. you shouldn't have to get praise from someone else but yourself. my recent achievement is opening my eyes more to some of the things that have been hiding in the back of my brain.
I tend to not listen to people when they try to compliment me because I don't believe that people tell the truth most of the time. I probably do not give myself enough credit, but I try too it is just hard when you don't believe other peoples words. It all starts with self love and that is what I tend to lack. I appreciate people's compliments but also I don’t always believe them. I focus on my failures rather than my accomplishments and that's where I go wrong.
Yes I give myself enough credit for my accomplishments because I am proud of everything i do. I can't really accept compliments because I don't really know how to. I just say thank you for everyone. I dont keep track of my accomplishments because I don't see a reason to. I am happy when I complete a task but after it I just move on to the next one. A recent achievement I am proud of is completing my portfolio presentation. I passed it and now I'm done with it I'll move onto the next thing now.
When it comes to my own achievements i give myself no praise. I already know I'm great I don't need to hear it from myself. personally I search for praise from other people, like my friends, parents and grandparents.
I sometimes give myself credit with my good grades or my sports accomplishments. On the other hand, I do look at my failures a lot so that I can gain knowledge to learn from them and become a better person. I really like hearing compliments from other people because it helps me realize that there must be some good things about me and I really take that in and feel good about it. Usually I try to compliment others so they they can feel better too and so that they can feel better about me as a friend.
I can admit that I definitely do not give myself enough credit for my own successes. I like to focus on my failures more than my accomplishments because that’s the way I think it should be. Instead of focusing on my accomplishments, i would see what failures I made to get to that accomplishment. Yes I do accept compliments from other people even though, lots of the time I don't believe what they are saying. A recent achievement would be scoring 25 points in my basketball game, I did not really think that it was that big of a deal, but everybody was so proud of me and amazed. So there is a time where I did accept lots of compliments.
Personally I feel like I don’t give myself enough credit for my own successes because I tend to focus more on the negative aspects to the situation that the positive. When I’m working on something, I tend to put myself through a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety because I overthink a lot. Sometimes when I get positive feedback on the assignment/work that I was working on, I tend to focus more on all the unnecessary stress and pressure that I put myself through because I overthought it to a level where I can’t really be happy for myself. I’m also not saying that whenever I do good on something I don’t feel good about it because it's a really good feeling when you put a lot of effort into something and your hard work pays off. When it comes to people giving me compliments, I’m in between. Sometimes I feel really awkward because I tend doubt myself a lot so when someone says the opposite of what I think about myself. I get really awkward and don’t know how to respond. I think the reason why I’m so awkward when it comes to people giving me compliments is because I always give them to other people so when I receive the love back, It’s weird for me and I tend to not know how to react.
I do not give myself enough credit for my success. I focus more on my failures because they help me move on and become better. I love compliments from others. It is motivating and it helps drive me. I am never embarrassed when people compliment me. I always compliment others so they can feel good as well. I think keeping a list can help see people's accomplishments so they can see their progress. Just yesterday I had a bowling tournament. I did good and my teammates gave me compliments.
After successfully completing a goal, I often receive momentary euphoria, then I move on to another task. It is very rare for me to consistently use my successes at motivation. This is because I find my previous failures to be a much stronger driving force.
It is not our accomplishments that teach us, but the times that we struggled and failed. It is much easier to keep coasting along than picking yourself up. The satisfaction of coming back from defeat is what you remember, not all the times that you worked with ease.
Alternatively, it is important to have the motivation to continue with your success. Giving yourself a pat on the back after finishing a daunting task is crucial in keeping morale high. All I'm saying is that recalling your successes is far less beneficial than what you learn from your failures.
The first thing you will notice if you go into a public high school today is the oddly large amount of students with low self esteem; it won't just be the kids with low grades and less friends, but also the kids with exceptional grades and members of great organizations within the school. This is because all of our lives, American students have been unintentionally raised to focus on our failures, like Jeremy Engle points out. Parents will lecture their children if they have one B on their report card, even though all of the other grades are A's. This is teaching the American student to dwell on small disappointments even though there is still so much good to be recognized. Today, we need to educate American children to be proud of their accomplishments and accept little failures while instilling a drive to improve themselves throughout their life. This will then grow a generation that is comfortable accepting compliments and one that is able to recognize their own successes without feeling ashamed and embarrassed.
I am now a junior in high school and I am still learning how to accept a compliment; it is very difficult for me to understand that when my friend says I did a god job, it is okay to agree with them. If I continue to ignore my successes and only focus on my failures, I will never enjoy my life. Giving yourself a compliment and learning to accept it is a process that can take years to grasp, but in the end, it is worth the time it takes to gain that skill.
I can admit that I definitely do not give myself enough credit for my own successes. I like to focus on my failures more than my accomplishments because that’s the way I’ve been taught since early childhood. Instead of focusing on my accomplishments as a kid my parents would focus on my failures. For example, when I was first grade I brought home my report card to my parents and I was excited because I made AB honor roll. When I gave them the report card they weren’t impressed and lectured me on the B I got in Language Arts. They ignored the fact that I got straight A’s in everything else and how my teacher made a comment on how great a student I am. Moments like this caused me to have very little self-esteem growing up and then when I was bullied from 2nd-6th grade it made my self-esteem even worse. Then as my situation got better in 7th grade I didn’t know how to react whenever I received compliments from somebody. I always assumed that they didn’t mean it or that they were being sarcastic. To this day I still am learning how to take a compliment from someone and as I’m currently on the journey of rebuilding my self-esteem I will definitely try out keeping track of my accomplishments as it seems like something that could potentially motivate me and improve my performance.
It is true that receiving compliments or praise for the work you did can boost your moral, but there is that awkward feeling when receiving it. I personally do feel uncomfortable when people tell me I did a good job. I don't know how to respond properly because I want them to know that I'm grateful, but at the same time, I don't want to seem full of myself.
Everyone at some point has felt uncomfortable when receiving praise it's just in our nature. I enjoy complimenting others because I hope I can make their day just a little bit better. Whenever we receive we always try to downplay our accomplishments and I believe people should be proud of what they've done. There is honestly no right way to receive a compliment. People can tell when you're grateful.
The reasons the article addressed for why people don’t accept compliments really stuck with me. A part of me now realizes that I deflect compliments almost instinctively. Just a few hours ago, I had an orchestra performance. My mom was beaming with pride and complimented me, saying I was the best one there. I started babbling about how everyone else had to overcome issues just to play as well as they did. The reaction was almost automatic. My line of logic was that if she’s complimenting me, then she insulting everyone else. But now that I know the importance of accepting a compliment, I hope to maybe combat this tendency.
The idea of being aware of your own strengths really got to me as well. I know some of mine like my writing, or being good at insightful conversation, but I have something of a blind spot when it comes to some of my talents. One time, I was helping one of classmates with a problem in math class. When I was finished going through the steps of the problem, she said, “You know, you’re really good at this teaching thing.” I was almost a little confused when she said it. I didn’t consider myself a teacher at all. I felt like I didn’t have the patience for ot or the skill for it. But, I’m glad she said it, because it realizing I had it in me felt pretty good.
This article really connected with me. I hope that by following just a bit of this article’s advice, I can really work on my self-image and self-confidence.
If I were to succeed at something, I'll feel really good about it right after but as more time goes by, I start to think of what I could have done to make it better. I feel like I do not give myself enough credit on my accomplishments. I tend to anxiously overthink about things that in reality do not even matter that much. For instance, I could get one point taken off of a group project and even though the point was not deducted from my part, I still think to myself, ‘I could've done better, all I had to do was check their work’. Higgs shares, “getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more” (Engle, 2018, para. 4). I agree with this statement but then again, those good feelings only last so long for people who feel as if they could've done better. The idea of perfection can do more harm than good. People may feel the need to overwork themselves to be the perfect student, employee, or even friend or family member. If we got rid of the idea of being perfect at everything, then maybe more people would enjoy their accomplishments rather than thinking of the little things that could've been fixed.
I think I give myself enough credit. When I do something well, I usually tell someone so they can share the experience with me, and hold me accountable for next accomplishments. Sometimes I like to keep it to myself to remember all the hard work I did when nobody was looking. I like that more most of the time because then I have a secret accomplishment that nobody knows but pushes me to do more. I do except compliments and I give them. I think the glowing feeling you get after a compliment is important, so everyone should receive that.
The amount of credit I give myself for my success depends on whether I truly wanted to succeed or if I had to succeed to meet my expectations. There are many pressures on our generation today to do succeed in everything from our parents and peers. On the other hand we set goals and once we achieved them, we feel satisfaction from the hard work done in order to accomplish it.
In school I feel stressed about big tests and assignments that can determine the outcome of my overall grade. The article states that “the ancestors of ours that were negative worrywarts were more likely to survive, so our brains are designed to look for problems. I can definitely see why people succeed nowadays because they focus on the problems.
Other times I am thrilled about my success in a certain area or activity. In cross country, I beat my personal record at one of the biggest meets and everyone including myself was so excited. I wanted to beat it so badly. The article says, “research shows that meaningful praise can measuring boost motivation and performance and can improve your brain’s ability to remember and repeat new skills.” I can relate to that fact because after that race, I wanted to run more and more meets.
While I agree with what the article says, our brains are trained to look for problems, I think in this day and age we are less likely to celebrate our success because for many of us it just feels as if we are doing what's expected us- meeting standards instead of surpassing them. An A on a test is expected for most of us, and parents are more likely to nod and say 'don't let that slip' instead of 'good job, keep it up!' However I think a little self celebration is very important for all of us, and pushing through the awkwardness of it leads to a healthier mindset and a better outlook overall. If you won't hype yourself up, who will?
In today’s society we often criticize others for being proud of their work, claiming that they come off as too arrogant, egotistical, or self-centered. But by doing so, individuals aren’t fully appreciating all that they are capable, and have achieved. In my case, usually when getting recognition or a compliment, I tend to acknowledge it, but i don't typically do anything about it. But when I receive a negative feedback, I do all that I can to fix it. As Dr. Neff stated, “our brains are designed to look for problems”, so even though we have achieved a great amount of success, we still look for critical aspects we can change to become better. Instead if we realized our success, we would have a push to do more and create more. Giving credit will allow individuals to become more confident of their successes, resulting in a boost of confidence and achieving even more.
People, including myself, will get to a point in their lives where they accomplish something, and it's not to big of a deal. Being able to successfully compliment you're achievement, no matter the size, can be very beneficial. I would use my streaming career that I've been working on for about 2 years as an example as thinking of the positives in every success. I personally don't have a lot of followers, like at all, but I take every single person that follows, or does anything worth value as a super huge success in my book. No matter if I have good days or bad day, I try to make even the smallest of things that happen to me a stepping stone into a more successful future. If you don't give yourself enough success/credit for the things you do that help yourself, or others, then how will you ever enjoy them. Lindsay Holmes, a writer for LIFE magazine, would agree that the small things like when "you brought your friend some post-breakup ice cream" or big things, when "you shared your honest opinion" all deserve some kind of credit/praise as she uses in "6 Times You Definitely Didn't Give Yourself Enough Credit". Altogether, you could say that giving yourself credit for your successes, no matter the size, is a very important thing to do.
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In a world where giving yourself praise for accomplishing the goals you set for yourself is often looked upon with a sense of arrogance. I myself do not give enough credit for my own successes because I feel like the best a most modest way to handle success is to be humble but confident. However, this doesn't infer that my successes don't go unnoticed as I enjoy the satisfaction of being able to accomplish anything I put effort in making me more likely to motivate me into becoming someone better. I often appreciate the compliments I receive from others at times where I feel like I really earned it. I'm never embarrassed when someone praises me because getting recognition for your accomplishments gives a really big confidence boost making me strive to become even better. Thus, I often compliment people when I know they've strived in order to reach their accomplishments. As well as I know, everyone enjoys getting recognized for the hard work they put in. Everyone needs a bit of a confidence boost every once and a while.
When reading Micaela Marini Higgs article “How to accept a compliment -- Even if It’s From Yourself,” I personally recognize the problem society faces of dwelling of failures more than compliments. As a person that struggles with confidence and is over-critical of my work, I understand the battle that comes with achieving and failing and how to react to such. Higgs claims that meaningful praise can measurable boost motivation and performance, and I agree with her. Speaking from experience, praise and compliments, even on unfinished or otherwise poor work, leads to more motivation to make that work even better. Higgs also describes how celebrating achievements personally can lead to major psychological benefits. I personally don’t often compliment myself, yet I concede to admitting that, when I do, the world brightens up and my later works turn out better than the previous ones. Overall, I agree with Higgs’ general claim that compliments and good recognition lead to more success and a decrease in stress and firmly believe that society should loosen up and take a look at the brighter side of its fallbacks.
I definitely don't give myself enough credit for my accomplishments. I don't want to come off as egotistical or cocky towards the people around me. I run cross country as a sport. Most of the time, when I get a good time for me, I tend to think that "it could've been better". My parents will compliment me on my time but I still think about the bad side of it.
If you live your whole life denying your accomplishments, thinking "I could've done better" though, you won't lead a happy life. Although I think that when I run cross country sometimes, I also congratulate myself a lot, because it feels good to know you did something good.
I think people shouldn't think about their failures as much as they should think about their victories. Feeling happy is one of the best feelings a person can have, so we should think about that more.
I agree with Dr. Amabile. I think that, as she says, we “tend to dwell on failures more than compliments.” I happen to do this a lot. I often times look at the grade I got, and then if it’s bad, I look at the comments, and I keep thinking about how I can’t tell my parents because of how bad it is. When I get an “A” I still don’t think I can tell my parents because they are expecting “A”s so it is no big deal.
When Dr. Amabile says “it is the internalized message that it’s not good to seem like we’re bragging,” I could relate to it because I’m always trying to please people and that means that sometimes I tend to hold off on what I am proud of because I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings if they didn’t do as well as I did. For example, if I got an “A” on a math test, I would be really happy, because I am terrible at math. I would be really happy and want to tell people. But, I wouldn’t be able to because if someone else failed the test, I don’t want them to feel bad about it.
I tend to brush off compliments I receive from other people. I don’t like having attention on me and it makes me feel weird if someone compliments me. I feel like I need to complement them back or else it’ll be rude. Usually, I just say “Thank you” and move on, and don’t really think about what they said.
It is easy for people to get in a mindset where they become overly confident. However, a cocky personality is usually followed by a humbling experience to re-balance the social status of culture. In society people that give themselves too much credit take compliments well because positive words feed their hungering desire to be praised. People that don't give themselves enough praise don't take compliments well because they are trying to maintain a humble disposition. Situational experiences have a massive impact on people's confidence level. When something positive happens to someone such as a promotion, people's confidences usually raise. Thus, when something negative happens to someone like a difficult break-up, people can become introverted and lowly. People do not need to get recognition from others. Rather, people who are insecure should give themselves more credit. Everyone has good qualities that need to be complimented.
I feel like people like to point out the negatives in everything instead of the positives so I started to think bad about everything I've done instead of looking at all the good things I do so I don’t feel the best about the work I've done.
I know I don’t give myself enough credit for my successes and tend to focus more on the negatives. It’s hard to be happy about something you feel you can do better even if you can’t. Being judged for every small move you makes you think something is wrong with you and everything you do. When I receive compliments I just say “thank you” but just think they are saying it to be nice. When i do good on something it doesn’t feel right. I don’t like being recognized because that means next time i’ll have to do even better and stress even more than I already am. I rather be the girl nobody knows and never gets recognized because I will never accept me doing good.
Do i give myself credit for my accomplishments? If you think being happy about it for a second counts. Its hard to be happy about success because you dont want to be that person. The person that acts like they do well in everything just because they got one good grade. The person that doesnt think about the feelings of the people who may have failed that quiz or lost that competition. Its hard because its those bad grades or lost competitions that make you think this was just an easy test. Its not a big deal, its just a fluke. I know those people that do well on everything dont have the bad grades to bring them down and honestly they annoy me. They annoy me because im jealous of theyre success. And i know thats not a great thing to think. But its the truth. Everyone feels that way one way or another. I wish i was the smartest kid in class. And i bet i could be, but its hard to compete with the kids who have been top of the class since fourth grade.its hard to accept that you can do it when you get that bad grade. And when you get that good grade you think that you can do this.
As Dr. Neff said, human brains are designed to focus more on problems rather than successes. For myself this remains very true, but I don’t see it as a flaw or mistake; in fact, my more negative nature encourages me to perfect my arts. For example, when I get a paper returned to me with corrections on it, I enjoy correcting my own mistakes more than writing the original paper. I like knowing that my extra effort improves my work and fixes my mistakes. Being young also encourages a negative mindset, regardless of how positive children’s books are. Especially in high school, teens are encouraged to put their best effort in and achieve as many things as possible, but here lies the problem: High school students aren’t encouraged to achieve things for their own benefit, but the benefit of a college or resume. Many teens do record their achievements just as the article suggests, but for an instrumental value of an impressive resume rather than their own self-confidence and mental health. When I achieve something, my mind quickly turns to the next project rather than resting on my success. And, while this makes many students overall less happy, it encourages improvement of work all the time. I certainly wouldn’t be where I am academically if I had become complacent with my own previous success. Ultimately, a negative mindset is very helpful for improving yourself, but continuing to be negative all the time can create its own devastating effects.
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Personally I feel like I don’t give myself enough credit for my own successes because I tend to focus more on the negative aspects to the situation that the positive. When I’m working on something, I tend to put myself through a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety because I overthink a lot. Sometimes when I get positive feedback on the assignment/work that I was working on, I tend to focus more on all the unnecessary stress and pressure that I put myself through because I overthought it to a level where I can’t really be happy for myself. I’m also not saying that whenever I do good on something I don’t feel good about it because it's a really good feeling when you put a lot of effort into something and your hard work pays off. When it comes to people giving me compliments, I’m in between. Sometimes I feel really awkward because I tend doubt myself a lot so when someone says the opposite of what I think about myself. I get really awkward and don’t know how to respond. I think the reason why I’m so awkward when it comes to people giving me compliments is because I always give them to other people so when I receive the love back, It’s weird for me and I tend to not know how to react.
Success is a reason to be proud of yourself, getting good grades, making that sport, getting into the advanced choir, and acing tests. However, some people in today's society don't realize how successful they are until it's over. In today's school we are stressed, and concerned with the assignments loaded onto us to the point we can't see how good we are in those classes, we can't tell how good of grades we have. Being able to see yourself as "successful" means you are constantly on top of everything in your life, which means your relationships, your classes, a job if you have one, and many other things. Working on yourself will make you successful to you, but does that make you successful to society's standards? Well, it depends on what you choose to do with your life and how you live it or how you choose to go about the work and stress. We need to learn how to see what is more important in life before we can parade ourselves for being successful.
I am more of a person who recognizes their accomplishments but dwell more on my failures. I like looking at my failures since it pushes me to do better next time or just improve as a person. Yet, the article would argue me by stating that, “getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more. Companies use praise to try to boost productivity and even revenue, and experts say that the psychological impact of keeping a positive view of your accomplishments can decrease stress and encourage better habits”(Engle, 2018, para. 4). I mean I can understand that but just to look at my failures makes me say “I could do better”. I do stress a lot so maybe I should look more at my accomplishments. I always accept compliments because it would be rude not to but I always return one. I do sometimes get red in the face with embarrassment but that happens. At times though I do feel like there is a line that you need to stop giving compliments. Even though the author said, “compliments can be rich sources of information”(Engle, 2018, para.12). I can see that if you are negative but I am definitely not a person that is negative. Complimenting someone that has a low self esteem can make their day better through a few words.
In today’s society most people don’t like to recognize what they have done well, because we are always being pressured to keep on doing more. This mindset and environment can be a blessing and a curse. We as students want to grow and be better, but if everyone is always on our case, and forcing us to be something we don’t want to be, then the drive and motivation slips away. This means when people try to recognize us for doing good, we just sort of push it to the side and move on. We need to learn to see the good we’ve done and then be better.
Sometimes I fail to give myself the credit that I deserve for my successes because even though I may have succeeded, there’s always room for improvement. Dwelling on improvements is more difficult for sure. Dwelling on failures typically motivates people to do better and really pushes for something they want to accomplish. Keeping track of my accomplishments on a daily list is a goal of mine. Growing as a person is very important and every day is a new chance to become the person you’ve always strived to be. In the article, “ Do You Give Yourself Enough Credit For Your Own Successes?”, it claims that, “... Getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more” (Engle, 2018, para. 4). The praise and compliments that people receive after an accomplishment feels amazing. Telling people they did a good job makes them want to be successful in other areas because it makes them feel confident within themselves and their work. What are you going to do to be successful today?
It’s hard for someone to give their self credit, we feel as if we’re too self centered and don’t want to seem as if we are waiting for someone else to praise us. I personally do not give myself enough credit for my accomplishments because of the thought of people judging me for being egocentric. “Pumping yourself up after a big win can feel a little awkward. You want to acknowledge good work, but you don't want to feel arrogant” (Higgs,2018, para. 1). Instead of being proud that I went out of my way and got this task done I will think of every way I could have done it better even when I am told that there was nothing wrong with the way I did it. “And yet: As we all know - and the research shows - humans tend to dwell on failures more than compliments” (Higgs, 2018, para. 5). This shows that many people have a hard time giving their self credit and rather find all the negative things instead of feeling conceited because they admitted that they actually had a success.
Like many other students my age I don’t take enough credit for my own successes. Whenever I do something others would consider successful I right it off as something that was easy and doesn't deserve to be recognized. I’m used to meeting a high standard that I set for myself, so when I got straight A’s or got into the NHS program at my school I didn't make a big deal about them because that's what I expect myself to do. According to Melody Wilding “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value,” (Higgs, 2018, para. 11). When I get credit for something that I’m good at I accept the compliment and move on with what I’m doing, but I never take it to heart. When I get a compliment and actually think about it and tell myself it’s true I feel self centered. I know that telling myself that what I’ve done is not that big of a deal hurts my self confidence, but I’ve gotten myself into a cycle where I don’t have enough self confidence to feel good about something, but never give myself enough credit to have self confidence. I feel is something that many other students my age struggle with.
Compliments are a beautiful thing, people talk about strengths with pride. But not everyone believes this type of affection. For many having confidence is like trying to reach a ever-changing pedestal. Another issue that people do not always believe the compliment, even though the effort they put into it was their personal best.
Researches found people tend to see what they missed rather than what they accomplished and this article helped that point out. It was mentioned to, “embrace the power of those small wins and get comfortable taking credit”. Meaning not victory we celebrate is going to be a college acceptance letter or a cure for a disease, it can be smaller works that allows yourself to personally grow.
It's easy to overlook our small victories and strengths because “many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value”. Some have difficult times seeing what they are naturally gifted because they are focusing on comparing themselves to another to highlight ‘flaws’. So it's always good to take a step back and reflect on the accomplishments and even make a “brag sheet”, as the article called it, to let ourselves take credit for what we do.
Do we take enough credit for ourselves? No, I think so because we don't take into account the amount of effort and personal growth we put into a task. I think this article is a great way to pick up positive habits for learning to appreciate and love ourselves more.
“Worrywart.”
That doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel.
Giving myself praise has always been a challenge of mine. I don’t want to “brag”, but why should I feel ashamed to talk so highly of myself.
I worry what people will think of me when I tell them about my 100 on a test, or how amazing it felt to score the winning point in a volleyball game.
“Wow she really loves herself.”
“Way to rub it in our face.”
These are the scenarios playing in my head, trying to decide if I should say something or not, so I choose to just keep my mouth shut. I feel guilty. I don’t want to seem too self absorbed.
But, after reading this article I have come to the consensus that self pride is actually a vital part in your own happiness.
The part in the article that really spoke to me as a reader was the section titled “The power of self given kudos”. To give a quick summary, it basically said how people aren’t always going to recognize your hard work, so you have to give yourself credit before anyone else can. This is true. I spend a lot of time working hard to impress people of society, usually expecting praise, but not always receiving it. I have learned to give myself a quick pat on the back, or even a little happy dance, shuffle to left and right, some clumsy hand motions giving it a nice touch.
I enjoyed reading this article, it helped me realize that I shouldn’t be ashamed in feeling proud. We all need the extra motivation, and it might just come from yourself.
Compliments are a beautiful thing, people talk about strengths with pride. But not everyone believes this type of affection. For many, having confidence is like trying to reach a ever-changing pedestal. Another issue is that people do not always believe the compliment, even though the effort they put into it was their personal best.
Researches found people tend to see what they missed rather than what they accomplished and this article helped that point out. It was mentioned, “embrace the power of those small wins and get comfortable taking credit”. Meaning not victory we celebrate is going to be a college acceptance letter or a cure for a disease, it can be smaller works that allows yourself to personally grow.
It's easy to overlook our small victories and strengths because “many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value”. Some have difficult times seeing what they are naturally gifted because they are focusing on comparing themselves to another to highlight ‘flaws’. So it's always good to take a step back and reflect on the accomplishments and even make a “brag sheet”, as the article called it, to let ourselves take credit for what we do.
Do we take enough credit for ourselves? No, I believe not because we don't take into account the amount of effort and personal growth we put into a task. I think this article is a great way to pick up positive habits for learning to appreciate and love ourselves more.
The question is do I give myself enough credit for my success? I would love to say yes but I know that the answer is no. You might ask am I not proud of my success, but that's not the case. I have done a lot of things in life,I have rose to the top for example coming in first place at a sporting event, receiving academic achievement, and also even finishing everything that was on my to do list of the day. The truth is I don't believe I need to be praised at just working hard and wanting success for myself. I kinda just brush it off as if it was no big deal, like I should have wanted to do my best anyway.
In the article it states “ studies show that in the workplace, women, and especially women of color, are often given less credit and assigned important but undervalued projects, meaning less recognition come promotion time”. I believe that means people put themselves on a pedestal and don't give the people that actually give their all no value. Like they don't belong because you believe you are more important than the other, even though they are doing your work. In the world today we don't lift each other up as we should.We just accept the norm and wanting people to do well but not better them yourself. So we may underestimate others and give them a harder time just because of who they are and not actually looking at what they have done to deserve their accomplishment, but expecting their best effort.
In so many areas of my life, my performance is carefully measured. I often become overwhelmed by the constant urging to do better, to do more. There is always something else to improve. This concept of betterment should be motivating, not overwhelming.
I have witnessed myself and others feeling this sense of overload. We operate under constant pressures in many parts of our lives such as school, sports, and community involvement. Pressures that come in these areas may be seen as motivating, but it takes reflection and appreciation to continue to develop. Burnouts can develop from a passion turning into a task.
In her article, “How to Accept a Compliment — Even if It’s From Yourself,” Micaela Marini Higgs writes, “Unlike the aspirational and often ambitious to-do list, the focus here is looking at what you’ve already accomplished, not things still on your plate.”
In a world that encourages people to skip onto the next item on a full schedule, it is more important than ever to remember to find intrinsic motivation through self-appreciation. Appreciation leads to reflection, from which comes true growth.
I think it is very unnatural for someone to credit themselves for their success. Usually after doing something worthy of praise you just sweep it under the carpet and forget about it, whereas if it is a failure it sticks with you forever. "As we all know — and the research shows — humans tend to dwell on failures more than compliments."
As stated in the article “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value, she said, which is why compliments can be rich sources of information." Going off of the last quote I do feel as if compliments are the perfect middle ground, because naturally it is very hard to compliment yourself, whereas you compliment others and they compliment you, now everyone has a reason to acknowledge what they have done.
I do believe when I receive a compliment I still lightly brush it off, as almost to prove to myself I don't have an ego, but I do believe it still sticks more than trying to compliment yourself. In the end I think compliments are a great source of acknowledgement, and can bring the praise someone deserves for their handwork, and make them more likely to continue it.
What really Intrigued me was when I saw the article “ Do you give yourself enough credit for your own success?” And it made me think and even question if I do. I don’t ever think I do, in my mind I am constantly thinking there is always room for more improvement and better success. I do praise myself if I get a lot of work done or if I work super hard on something but I don’t actually praise my grades. In my opinion, I totally agree with Jeremy Engle “It’s that tricky balance of quietly revealing in a job well done without coming off as… well a jerk” (Engle, 2018, paragraph 3). For me, I always feel weird talking about myself in a higher position if that makes sense. I always joke around and make myself seem like I have a big ego and I’m obsessed with myself and I make self love jokes but in reality if you ask me to describe myself I will use every simple word such as tall, blonde ect.. before I use words like funny, kind, caring ect… “ Despite that awkwardness, getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more. Companies use praise to try to boost productivity and even revenue, and experts say that the psychological impact of keeping a positive view of your accomplishments can decrease stress and encourage better habits” (Engle, 2018, paragraph 4).
The environment that I am living in, and that many of my peers live in, at school and at home, is s stressful one. We are given small words of praise by our parents and teachers when we accomplish something, usually something big for most do not praise for little things, and, in the case of me and many of my friends, verbal beatings for our bad grades and subjects we are struggling with. I think that older people see success is something of a default, something that is expected, and have imposed that onto us, when is actuality success are something to recognize, like the article reads. People, especially young people want reassurance that they are doing something good. Even as I am writing this I am hoping someone will see this and agree with me, maybe even further a discussion with me, because I, like everybody else, want people to recognize me. I don't give myself enough credit in the things I accomplish.
I’m the type of student that is always reaching for straight A’s and always attempting to make turn in-times, and 99% of the time, I achieve these goals. I have maintained a great GPA throughout high school so far, however I tend to dwell on the negatives I experience more. I could have good grades in all classes, but if I get a B or lower on a test or assignment, that sticks in my head a lot. I recently received a letter for my grades in school last year, to which I received a couple “good jobs” from my parents, but no more than that. Having good grades has always been something my parents and I have both expected, making this and other achievements not seem so special. I often times tend to be hard on myself when it comes to school and not getting the highest grade possible, because I recognize that I have the ability to do better than that. The article gets into how other individuals feel about success and failure, and states “As all we know -- and the research shows --humans tend to dwell more on failures more than compliments” (Higgs, 2018, para. 9), so I guess I’m not alone when it comes to this. There’s just something about not reaching something you want, or not performing as well as you want, that sticks out more than a positive. You’re stuck thinking about ways you could improve, what you didn’t do, what you failed to mention, etc., whereas if you already complete something to the fullest, there isn’t as much to improve on, making you think less about it.
I have tried to be very kind and uplifting for others. I always try to complement someone genuinely without making an empty compliment. It always feels really good when someone compliments you but I am not sure if it seems like I am fishing for compliments. I am not, but not everyone knows that. I love making people feel better and giving them confidence but I don't think that I give myself enough compliments. As happy as I may seem, sometimes I just need to compliment myself to gain more confidence. Recently, I went to my parent teacher conferences, and all f my teachers really like me. My parents praised me and I was very proud of myself. I think I celebrated my accomplishment enough and I was really happy with the way my parents acknowledged it.
I most likely don't give myself enough credit because when I do people assume that I'm annoying and entitled. When I do something good I just think about how I can improve and how to be a better me. Which isn't a bad thing but it also isn't good either. I can think of one way I'm talented because theres always someone better than me but thats always going to be true no matter who you are and how good you are. Picasso was and still is amazing and he was bullied for the way he expressed himself through art. He though he was nothing but he kept going and now he's one of the most well known artists. Queen was and still is amazing and everyone knows their music. They were put down by many people and told they wouldn't be anything but they kept going also and now they're one of the most well known group people creating many songs in their lives. They knew they were good no matter what people said but they kept going and so should you.
Often, I look at the negatives of a situation. I do not give myself enough credit for what I have accomplished. When I do give myself credit, it is not enough. After reading this article, I realized how much doing it can actually improve your mental health.
I usually don't give myself enough credit for my successes. At soccer, I'll do a certain drill better than I previously did, but I usually don't acknowledge it. I just keep playing as if nothing happened, although if I acknowledged it would I be a lot more positive about practice than I was before.
The same thing goes for school, I never give myself enough credit for doing well. For example, I passed my excel certification test first try, and I was one out of three kids that did, but I just shrugged it off and didn't really think anything more about it. Our teachers don't ever really give us credit either, they just hand us back our papers, and the only thing that's on it is a grade.
I remember once last year when my math teacher told me that I did really well on a test since I got a 97. At first I shrugged it off like I usually do to compliments, but after I thought about it for a while, I felt really proud of myself because I'm not usually very good at math, so I was really proud of that grade. The article states: "Meaningful praise can measurably boost motivation and performance and improve your brain's ability to remember and repeat new skills." I definitely think this is true because after my teacher said that to me I felt much more motivated and positive about the next math test I would have, and it helped me remember how to do that particular type of math. Overall, I think we should all acknowledge our successes more often than we usually do.
You’re on that soccer field. You’re running and the ball is right at your feet. Just a couple more strides and you pull your leg back and kick the ball. The ball flies through the air into the goal. Everyone starts to cheer for you. The loud noises, the whistling, you teammates coming up to congratulate you. That feeling of success.
That feeling is felt when something big and great happens in our lives and the people around us like friends and family celebrate it with us, but what about the small moments? What about when you complete a project that was difficult? Or when reach your goal of drinking 1.5 liters of water a day? We don’t get a lot of external recognition for it. Giving yourself a mini-celebration or a pat on the back can cause you to be more motivated in what you did.
As humans we tend to focus more on the negative things in life because of our ancestry. The ones who were “negative worrywarts,” said by Kristin Neff tented to survive longer. But, as much as our brains want to focus on the negative thoughts we need to give ourselves more credit. By thinking more positively you can become more productive in what you do. Either in a workplace, school or in your home life.
All in all we need to give ourselves more recognition for the small things we do because life is only filled with few big moments, but many little moments that are worth celebrating.
I never knew that self recognition had mental benefits. This is very interesting and important, thank you for opening my eyes.
Now a days if you get overly excited about having a success people will begin to feel anger towards you. This seemingly happens quite often. There are times I get a good grade and I feel very proud of myself and then people will ask me what I got. I will tell them my grade and they will make remarks saying, “well of course you got that,” or “ no surprise there.” This almost diminishes my success in my mind when people begin to feel envious or make these remarks. I still feel accomplished having received that grade, but it doesn’t always make me feel satisfied.
When the article says, “ You want to acknowledge good work, but you don’t want to feel arrogant. It’s that tricky balance of quietly reveling in a job well done without coming off as … well, a jerk.” I relate to this because I want to acknowledge it and I want to feel satisfied but I don’t want to do it in front of someone who may have received a lower grade.
Success can be defined in many different ways. The definition of success will be defined differently by certain types of people. Someone who doesn’t achieve success as often as others will be more proud of a small success than someone who has many large accomplishments. To me success can come in many different “sizes”. I give myself a lot more credit for large accomplishments than I give myself for the small accomplishments. To me, the bigger the success the more credit I give myself. The research shows that “humans tend to dwell on failures more than compliments”(Amabile.2018.para. 9). If I get a 100% on one of my tests, but I get a 50% on a different test the same day I am more likely to dwell on my failure than my success. Recently, I lettered in academics at my high school. When I told my friends and family they were all so proud. Some told me in person, and some called or texted. I never actually did anything to celebrate my achievement, but I still feel really happy with myself! I think that we all, including me, should learn to be a lot more happy with our successes than our failures.
I feel like I definitely do not give myself enough credit for my own success. I feel when I do something thats reward-able I just brush it off not giving myself enough credit. I feel like I do tend to dwell on my own failures more often. When I do receive compliments I accept them but I think to myself is that even true. Most of the time when I receive a compliment I tend to feel embarrassed because I don't like to be called out. According to the New York Times article, “And yet: As we all know — and the research shows — humans tend to dwell on failures more than compliments”(Engle, 2018, para. 9). This quote I feel relates to me in the biggest ways possible. It definitely shows how More people tend to dwell on failures just like me compared to how many people actually give themselves credit. I feel that accomplishments should be kept to ourselves because I would feel guilty. Because if someone that was working on the same thing and they put in a lot more time and effort but you were the one the get praised for the accomplishment, and I feel like that is not right.
I don’t think that people today realize how talented they actually are and dwell more on the bad things that happened to them and the mistakes they made more so than the positive accomplishments they made. Even though it feels better to be acknowledged for the bad things we do than it does to be criticized for the things we missed, we always seem to remember and care more about the bad more than the good. Being more positive about yourself will lead to more accomplishments, “Because small setbacks can have a negative impact three to four times stronger than the triumph of a small win, keeping a list of achievements isn’t just helpful in giving you a motivational boost that day” (Engle 21). I think that people are too afraid to look like they are bragging so they stay quiet about their accomplishments and begin to think that they are insignificant. This may make them think they are insignificant and then they won’t do the best they can and it will be a cycle. Another reason this may happen is because you feel good when you do something good but when something bad happens then it gets stressed over and the stress will last until the situation goes away. This may make the person remember the stress more than the accomplishment as well. This is why keeping a list of accomplishment, as the author suggested, would be a good idea to help you realize that good things do happen everyday but you may not appreciate them or yourself enough.
Success can be a great feeling and helps motivate us to do great work in the future. I feel like for me, when I do something well or successfully, I don’t always give myself enough credit and will dwell more on some of my failures. The reason for this is because I know I haven’t done something right which could potentially affect other outcomes. For example, if I do bad on a test then I have to worry about my grade dropping. If someone gives me a compliment I will accept the compliment even when it is sometimes embarrassing or they make a big deal out of it making me feel like I’ve received too much praise. I try to compliment others and let them know when they’re doing a great job and should keep up the good work. I think short kind compliments like this are a great confidence booster and “can decrease stress and encourage better habits” (Engle, 2018, para. 4). Compliments don’t need to be super long and over the top, they can be as simple as, “great job” or “good work.” Next time someone gives you a compliment thank them, and enjoy that little moment of triumph. Also, if someone you know does well on something, compliment them. A compliment can make someone feel really good about themselves and give them the confidence they might need.
My story is none like others. My parents had broken the news to me, of having to move. At first I thought it was no big deal because they had generally implied that we would be moving. I assumed of it being to another house in our little village of Northern Italy. Although I was completely mistaken.
We were intended to move to the United States of America. As a nine year old digesting this information, at first I didn’t know how to react because I was overwhelmed. However, as time passed by, I began to pack all of my memories into cardboard boxes and I was ready to face this new chapter of life.
Picking up and leaving all of my confort behind to face a new reality was the best experience I could of ever asked for. It has shaped me into the individual I am today, because of all the experience and knowledge I have gained, once I had to completely rebuilt my life.
The article states “Pumping yourself up ... can feel ... awkward. You want to acknowledge good work, but you don’t want to feel arrogant.”
I was talking to my wonderful English teacher and we discussed the fact in how I was part of these two different worlds and it has made me install security in myself to be able to accomplish anything. I think back to my childhood, and I can still picture a little girl having no fear in the world.
I don’t express by acknowledgement of all the self growth this experience has brought me. It was truly a gift and I should not view it as a demand of attention.
In all honesty, I can say that without a doubt I don't give myself enough credit for any of my accomplishments. There have been multiple occasions where I've put my heart and soul into projects that I'm incredibly proud of, and have never mentioned it to my friends or family. Subconsciously, it's because I have such a strong fear of failure and judgment; and in sharing my successes, maybe my loved ones won't appreciate it. Other times when I am secretive about my success, it's because I don't want to seem arrogant or because I never truly see my accomplishment as anything more than average. As Micaela Marini Higgs wrote in her article, “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value.” Accepting compliments on anything has always been difficult for me. Once I learn to accept my own success as something worth sharing and celebrating then maybe I could learn to share them with others.
I love achieving things. Don’t you? Especially when it’s recognized by yourself or others. That good feeling you get afterwards always makes it worth it. I focus more on my accomplishments than failures because Dr. Teresa Amabile said, “Even small wins can lead people to feel terrific” (Engle, 2018, para. 7). The good weighs out the bad. I don’t keep track of my accomplishments and honestly haven't thought about it until now. According to Micaela Marini, “Despite that awkwardness, getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more” (Engle, 2018, para. 4). Therefore, I most definitely think that keeping a daily list will improve your motivation and performance. Anything to keep you in that good mood, right? People are worried about being arrogant, but I say don’t worry about what anyone thinks. Accomplishments are something to be proud of !
In a world where we are taught not to talk about our successes to avoid bragging, I find it hard to give myself credit for success, out loud or to myself. Given this mindset, it’s easier to focus on my not-so-great moments. Forgetting to do something, getting a bad test grade, or messing something up on the first try will change the course of my whole day. I’ll be in a bad mood, only focusing on what I did wrong instead of how I could improve myself next time. This generally makes it hard for me to accept compliments. My cheeks turn red and my hands clam up as I mindlessly deny all praise. At the end of the first quarter of the school year, I had all A’s in my classes. My family congratulated me, and I quickly said thank you and dismissed it. Everyone was recognizing my accomplishment but me. I could only focus on how I should’ve brought my French grade up from an A- to an A, and my pre-calculus grade from an A to an A+. Although I’m taking all honors or AP classes, which are slightly difficult, I still am working on being able to allow myself to acknowledge accomplishments. I’m trying to feel proud of my A- in French and that A in pre-calc. Even if it wasn’t what I had my hopes set on, I know I worked hard and put my best effort forth, and that’s all that really matters.
My story is none like others. My parents had broken the news to me, of having to move. At first I thought it was no big deal because they had generally implied that we would be moving. I assumed of it being to another house in our little village of Northern Italy. Although I was completely mistaken.
We were intended to move all away across the sea, to the United States of America. As a nine year old digesting this information, at first I didn’t know how to react because I was overwhelmed. However, as time passed by, I began to pack all of my memories into cardboard boxes and I was ready to face this new chapter of life.
Picking up and leaving all of my comfort behind to face a new reality was the best experience I could of ever asked for. It has shaped me into the individual I am today, because of all the experience and knowledge I have gained, once I completely rebuilt my life.
The article states “Pumping yourself up ... can feel ... awkward. You want to acknowledge good work, but you don’t want to feel arrogant.”
I was talking to my wonderful English teacher and we discussed the fact in how I was part of these two different worlds and it has made me install security in myself to be able to accomplish anything. I think back to my childhood, and I can still picture a little girl having no fear in the world.
I don’t express by acknowledgement of all the self growth this experience has brought me. It was truly a gift and I should not view it as a demand of attention.
This generation has many pressures put on them, stemming from school, our parents, friends, and social media. We're expected to succeed, so we're never praised for doing our best. Instead, the things that stick out, our bad grades or mistakes, are focused on and criticized. Never being praised for doing something right can make you discouraged and lead to lower performance. This is something we do naturally, and Dr. Kristen Neff states, "That’s because the ancestors of ours 'who were negative worrywarts were more likely to survive, so our brains are designed to look for problems..'"
Nowadays, we compare ourselves to so many other people, it can become overwhelming and cause us to developed insecurities and anxiety. We should instead do our best and not worry about what others are completing or accomplishing. Living in your own lane promotes self-love and the understanding that not everyone's perfect, which is something we all need to learn.
As students, I think a lot of us tend to forget that we had to start from somewhere to get to where we are today. We might complain about the pressure from a higher level class, but if you think about it, it's a personal success to even reach such a high level.
Personally, I tend to push off my successes as "expectations." I usually think that what would be considered a success isn't because it's what I should be doing, or should have in the first place. This is definitely relevant to me for grades. I often focus on the lower grades I have in my classes, but I do forget that all of my classes are difficult to even get to, and the rest of my scores are high. I should start recognizing the fact that already being in these courses and having a pretty decent grade is a success, even if it's not the highest I could get.
From the text, I think the quote "Even small wins can lead people to feel terrific," is relevant for everyone, but especially those with mental illnesses. It's very important for those with mental illnesses to acknowledge and appreciate even their smallest successes, like eating or showering, because it leads to an overall sense of accomplishment; this can help with the process of overcoming or learning to cope with said illness.
I don’t not give myself enough credit for my successes. I do tend to dwell all my failures more than my success, I don’t know how to give myself any credit. Even though all I want in the world is to be recognized and praised for my work I am not a person to be arrogant or try to make sure people know of my successes. Recently, I have achieved a GPA of above a 4.0. I got congratulations and such from friends and family, but I did not know how to react. I should have celebrated more, for example I was offered a gift but I politely denied it. I should be more accepting towards people being happy about my success. According to Jeremy Engle, when you succeed in something, “It’s that tricky balance of quietly reveling in a job well done without coming off as … well, a jerk”(Higgs, 2018, para. 1). This is a main factor to why I do not give myself credit for my success. I do not want other to think I am bragging. I believe I receive too much praise with small matters but not enough with more significant accomplishments.
I can honestly say, that I don’t not give myself enough credit for my successes. Even though all I want in the world is to be recognized and praised for my work, I don’t know how to give myself any credit. I am not a person to be arrogant or try to make sure people know of my successes. Whenever someone compliments me on a good grade or completing a tedious project, I never know how to take their compliment. There’s nothing more that I want in the world then to be recognized, but anytime someone does, I switch into “freeze dance mode”. Being the awkward person I am, all I say is “Thanks.”, because it’s the only response that comes to my mind.
Like it says in the article, “Many times our strengths come so naturally to us that we don’t realize their value,”. I can relate to this quote, because I don’t think of myself as an extraordinary person who accomplishes noteworthy tasks. I don’t keep track of my successes and when I get recognized for them, I am so pleasantly shocked that I don’t know what to do.
The article I chose was “Do You Give Yourself Enough Credit For Your own Success.” I do not belive I give myself enough credit for my success. I mainly dwell on my failures: “As we all know — and the research shows — humans tend to dwell on failures more than compliments.” Even if it is not a failure per se, it still may not meet my standards. The only reason I can recall for doing this is, I know I can always do better somehow. Even if I get straight A’s and the highest grade point average possible with the level of classes I am in, I still beat myself up because I tend to believe that if I am able to get straight A’s, I should be able to go into higher classes. I will accept compliments from strangers, but not my friends or relatives. I am sure I have received an empty compliment at some point in my life time but do we really know if we have or not? I also believe I receive too much praise with small matters but not enough with more significant accomplishments. I do regularly compliment others. Most of the time is is a simple compliment: “you look nice today,” or “I love your hair.” They are small things that do not take much effort on my part but can be very impactful and important to another.
In today’s generation, unimaginable pressures are put on teenagers to get perfect grades, perfect test scores, and to have a perfect resume to apply to the most elite schools possible. We experience so much stress about acing every test and exam, that we frequently forget about the things we succeed in. As a sophomore in high school, I am taking a selection of honors and AP courses, and I often ignore my good grades in one class if I am struggling in a different subject.
I tend to perform strongly in my math classes, but need to study and work much harder in my English and history courses. I frequently will spend all my time worrying about these more challenging courses, and rarely acknowledge my higher scores in math classes. In the future, I will be working on having pride in my stronger grades, and not dwelling on the scores that are not as high as I would hope.
As the article states, “Because small setbacks can have a negative impact three to four times stronger than the triumph of a small win, keeping a list of achievements isn’t just helpful in giving you a motivational boost that day. It can also be an affirming reminder of your strengths the next time you go through a rough patch.” I believe that if I reward myself for the small successes in school, I will have an easier time accepting the lower scores in tougher courses. We put so much pressure on ourselves to have straight A’s, that we often forget the many successes we should be proud of.