Come-Ons, Takedowns and Insults: What It’s Like to Write Comedy as a Woman

Given what we now know about Facebook, why is Sheryl Sandberg still treated as a faultless icon and inspiration? Would any Times book review still treat Mark Zuckerberg the same way?

Admire so much of this insider's look. But where are the fact-checkers? Sex and the Single Girl came out in 1964.

Ms. Ryzik's brief review of "Just the Funny Parts" by Nell Scovell manages to touch some deep cords. 1. That running a show feels like being beaten up by your own dream. This, I have found but not articulated so well, is common to the pursuit of every great dream - in business, education, social organizations, etc. - whenever said dream is accompanied by a sense of higher purpose. I saw it in a country western singer, in a Hindu evangelist, in Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. 2. That for Ms. Scovell to be employable, her husband had to substantially stay at home in a primary child-care role. That's a rubber-hits-the-road psychological change that we men need to embrace as an accepted alternative if we want women to contribute equally their urgently-needed talents to the common good. Bias is unbelievably costly! 3. That the reviewer went through 57 pages before coming to her first laugh. Ouch! Laughing is life-giving, but it sounds - probably appropriately - more like laughing through our tears. We're all in this existence together - we help each other - yet there often ends up being a special few who do the heaviest lifting for the rest of us. Sounds like Nell Scovell is one of those. I look forward to reading her book.

A few years ago, I went to a "female variety comedy writers panel" that Nell Scovell had organized. I have been to dozens of the same events that featured all or almost all men. The thing that really struck me about the one that Ms. Scovell organized was one question she asked. The question was (I am paraphrasing): if any of the women had ever been laid because of their comedy writing. I was taken aback by this question because I had never ever heard any male asked even a remotely similar thing. I found the question quite unfortunate because it was the tired viewpoint of females, and females' jobs, being valued based on how appealing they were to men; it reduced women to sex objects. Who cares if it got them laid? Were they writing comedy for this end-goal? I was really surprised that Ms. Scovell would ask such a person-reducing question. The whole event was superficial and the least interesting of any of the similar events I had attended. And, it was not because the women weren't brilliant or interesting. It was because the questions being asked were surface and unimportant. Women need to be taken seriously (and just as seriously as men) and asked questions that reinforce their intelligence, nuance and wit. We all need to evaluate (women and men) how our words/actions may be contributing to the undervaluing of women. Ask her more.

The book sounds amazing and I admire Ms. Scovell for what she’s achieved. I wonder if she’s one of those women who was taught that to succeed with men she had to be only out for herself. So many super achieving women of her generation did it by pushing other women out of the way by seeing other them only as competition because there were so few seats for women at the table. There is an unconscious encoded misogyny in many women that they refuse to acknowledge because of how hard jobs were to come by and the lack of gender parity

I'm beginning to wonder if men, through evolution, aren't hardwired to compete and go for the jugular in a way we women can't begin to understand. And I'm wondering if many times, that they themselves aren't even conscious of this constant evaluation of threat in each other and us. There are so many wonderful individual men but as a gender, they seem to me the most dangerous creatures on earth.

Nell, you are a brave, brave soul. The ur-joke: “Take my wife...please!” It’s going to take some time to fix this. I wish you much good luck.

Could we never see the word "zeitgeist-y" in the Times again? Please?

Here is my opinion on this. Women have proven they can be just as good as men in jobs (and also just as bad too) including comedy. Any type of put down of a woman like hey you are not a bad comic for a woman is not acceptable. A joke like hey did you ever notice when men meet each other they say hey Harry, you old fat perverted slob how the hell are you, good to see you. You never see women say hey Mary you old water retentive fat cow, good to see you! This joke is acceptable. Bottom line is that women should be free to pursue comedy and not be harassed but also not to grow bitter, get angry or claim harassment if 50% of all comics are not female. It is a delicate balance.

I'm female and decades ago I would disparage a particularly know-it-all male, behind his back, with the comment "Knows the type of tampon you should be using." This meant that on every single subject on earth, bar none, he's the self-appointed expert and no one else knows anything. I stopped saying this aloud, but I still think "tampon guy" at meetings when a man is especially bossy or patronizing. So men aren't the only ones to "weaponize" tampons in the work place.

Sorry, ladies. I wish I had anything to make this issue disappear. My fellow men (and me, too many times in my own life,) are--to put it simply--jerks. in our defense we are handed a toxic world-view and most of us never stop to ask ourselves if it's fair or not. But that view won't change unless all of you call it out and challenge it every day. Don't let #MeToo fade away--it's too important. Time the human race stopped ignoring half of its genius. And maybe the better half, at that. To paraphrase Frank Zappa: I'm not a woman but there's a whole lot of times I wish I could say I wasn't a man.

Hey NYTs great article, I'm going to buy the book. In the ancient Celtic tribes throughout most of Europe, men and women were equals. Their personal relations ships were equal partners. They both equally held political offices, both lived and fought on the battlefield as equals.

I'm happy to read of this book by Nell Scovell and will buy it. When you write: "With a few biographical tweaks, she could be Conan O’Brien", don't you mean born male?

I'm a big fan of Nell's work on the early seasons of The Simpsons- the best seasons. I look forward to reading her book.

I teach comedy writing at a very well-known theater here in NYC. I can promise you: there are generations of comedians who are female coming up that will blast through all these barriers.

Love this...and her. What a relief that, at last...long, long, long last...what women have endured is being taken seriously. Thank you, Nell...

You know, at times my lousy personality has made people ask if I was raised by wolves. But now, reading about how many men treat women (and other people generally) so very badly, I wonder if maybe I was raised by the -good- wolves.

I shot a series of commercials with old, white, mostly Jewish male comedians. They were generally the same person; only their version was funny, only they could set the physical comedy up for the shot - a female director couldn't possibly have a better shot or blocking than they could concoct on the spot. Jerry Lewis told me that 'Women just aren't funny" and meant every word of it. It's a shame Joan Rivers died so soon and couldn't inspire another generation of female comics; she was the funniest and most vibrant of all of them - inclusive from the first moment of engagement.

I know it takes money, and there are a few Hollywood actresses becoming producers, but until things are equal in the comedy/entertainment/publishing world we need more women willing to hire more women. I'm happy that people like Reese Witherspoon are looking for original material written by women to be made into movies, and Meryl Streep helps sponsor a contest for women screenwriters over the age of forty. Until men quit talking to us the way they talked to Scovell, we'll need all the help we can get from women who have made it to the top. Plus, we need more men like President Obama.

Maybe someday we will live in a society when Ms. Scovell can write "Just the Bitter and Angry Parts". Maybe someone will option this book? Amazon? Hulu? Netflix? Showtime? HBO?

Power, power, power, I finally came to understand that sexual harassment was almost all about power. The point when there is harassment is to control a woman, beyond any chance attraction. That understanding came to me in college, only I had only a vague sense of the extent to which the problem was being confronted by women. Now, I know the extent.