The remark from Rep. Mark Kelly—"I'm a person of color; I'm white"—reminds me of the line from George Carlin: "We're not black and white; we're pink and brown."
But Rep. Kelly displayed stunning crassness in saying what he did, nonetheless.
1
14 out of 14.
The answers just wrote themselves, really.
I'll bet if I retook it and answered differently, I'd still get 14 out of 14.
Reality, what a drug!
I had 3 wrong and 10. But I'll not be giving away my wrong answers :) so as not to be a spoiler... Great way to remind us of how bonkers Trump is and showing why he should be removed asap!
1
Humorous yes, but that's what I like about Trump.
I get to wakeup every morning and see who Trump has insulted. And it's especially refreshing when he insults the NYTs, which has become nothing more than a newspaper with one long opinion piece after another.
No one except the elites expect any real news from the NYTS, unless of course the news happens to hate Trump.
Hey, life is beautiful.
It's very sad that I got a perfect score. What horrible times we are living through now.
2
Sharpie Map. An INSTANT Classic, the Trump Regime in two words.
Seriously.
2
Got them all and I don't feel good about it.
2
Gail we need a harder quiz, I got 14/14 and am not a stable genius and don't have an uncle who taught at MIT...but I do have friends who went there. My opinion of MIT dropped drastically after that. Why do people who excel in one discipline think they are experts in every subject, the osmosis effect?
I got 11 out of the 14 and guessed all but two, I wish the opposite were true. This stuff will rot your brain and heart.
1
Can we change our answers with a Sharpie ???
2
'Give yourself an “Informed Citizen” ribbon.' Well, that is flattering, but it is also a slight problem. See, I'm not a citizen, not even resident. This means that all this frightful stuff is known far and wide now.
We are still recovering here in Ireland from Mr Pence's cringe-making visit* and are somewhat preoccupied with the insanity next door of a Brexity nature. It has all become far, far too familiar.
*https://www.irishtimes.com/news/politics/miriam-lord-how-mike-pence-shat-on-the-new-carpet-in-ireland-s-spare-room-1.4006979
4
all you have to do to score 100 percent on this test is to pick the answers where trump either displays monumental stupidity or total narcissism
1
13/14--The only one I got wrong was the one about the Continental Army taking over the airports. I mistakenly believed that even Trump could not be that stupid.
2
Yup! Exact same score/mistake. AIRPORTS!!!???? HOW??
It is a sad commentary that I got a perfect score. I am way too involved in the minutiae of the demise of our republic. Rather than perseverating over each example of this explosive demise, I need to get out there and "do something" to help stop it.
1
14 out of 14. I was channeling my inner Onion.
5
Perfect, thanks to reading the NYT and watching the late night talk show hosts who highlighted the absurd statements of Kelly, Graham, etc.
1
Donald J. Trump or how a con man became president of the United States.
3
13 out of !4 here. Every question that pertained to Trump I quickly picked the most despicable, ignorant possibility; right every time.
8
Me too. Depressing to be so informed about the current occupant of the White House, isn't it?
13 of 14 shows.........it clearly is about mental health, mine.
4
The wrong answers were pretty funny. Fourteen!
3
100%! What a world we live in. Back in the days of reality my scores were never so high!
1
I'm sorry to say that I got 13 out of 14 correct. Clearly, I've been paying too much attention to this circus.
13
"Maybe it would be a good idea if we all went home and shut up for a while."
I knew it wasn't true but I had to try it.
5
Just pick the worst possible option and you'll always guess right about what Trump did.
12
That last one should read: More Un-American than Joe McCarthy and John C. Calhoun combined.
3
I'm ashamed to say I got a perfect score. Really have to start weaning myself from the insanity of political "news".
8
"Yertle the Turtel" did me in.
I can't stop laughing long enough to write anything but this.
Wonderful, Ms. Collins.
5
I'm a complete news junkie and nerd: 14/14.
"I'm a person of color. I'm white." Priceless!!!
3
White is the absence of color, which is why I have long considered myself a golden ivory.
The Trump Rule Of Relativity : There are degrees of Stupidity. When in doubt, Trump will ALWAYS choose the most Stupid solution, for ANY problem. It’s his Nature.
Seriously.
8
Either these are getting too easy or Trump is getting too predictable.
5
13/14. I wonder what Trump's score would be.
2
He'd probably get: 0/0. He'd then claim that he got: 14/14.
9
I couldn't stop laughing. Thank you Ms. Collins for reminding me of the absurdity of this presidency and all the things surrounding it. I particularly enjoyed the question about 9/11 even though the answer disappointed me. I was hoping that he had said something about his solid gold telescope. Oh well, they can't all be platinum records.
5
I got 12/14 mostly on guessing which answers seemed most absurd but had Trump's or a politician's stupid voice. Supposedly I'm an "informed citizen". I'm informed for knowing political drama or how ridiculous our leaders are? Um, okay. Guess I don't need to read the NY Times anymore...
1
Gail Collins writes a humorous column. It's supposed to be a highlight of the funny parts of the political process.
8
Fair enough. Though it's kind of depressing that knowing political drama and the absurdity of our political process is being "well-informed" and "current events". It would be nice if we could see actual journalism.
It would actually be nicer if we could see good, old-fashioned presidential behavior. Wouldn't that be a lovely surprise!?!
The cover pictures on the nytimes' website lately have been so over the top, it almost seems like parody at this point. It's so demoralizing to the point of being toxic. Some more examples, http://twitter.com/nytimesGLOOM
And this morning, #SharpieGate gave a few minutes of laughs. You can't make this stuff up. It's just too scary to realize this willfully ignorant malicious buffoon has the power to harm millions.
13
One hand on the nuclear button, the other on a Sharpie, a world map on the Resolute Desk. What could possibly go wrong......
1
Think of the stupidest response to any question. That's generally the right answer. I'm currently batting 800. Statistically, I should have been proven wrong by now.
2
You and me both Andy. I look at all the responses and if I don't know I pick the most idiotic one. It's pathetic to think that our response to a quiz like this is to select the least intelligent response rather than one that is, at the very least, a tiny bit thoughtful.
It's a conspiracy. By requiring us to remember all the stupid things Trump has said, our minds are subtly being reprogrammed downward. It doesn't matter if you love or hate him. So long as he occupies your attention, Trump wins.
3
so Gail is in ON it . . . I knew it . .
thanks, woofer.
That was too easy. You just pick the most absurd answers...
5
I set the coffee maker on Friday nights, crawl out of bed on Saturday morning, crawl back in with steaming mug, and do the Saturday quiz. Thanks, Gail, for this unexpected "treat." (12 out of 14; need to stay sharp, or maybe this guy has dulled us all.)
1
Now get out your sharpie pen and circle the answer Trump promotes.
3
13/14 - the craziest answer is the right answer!
I got them all correct. Either I know how stupid trump is or I'm paying way too much attention.
5
Big-Liar Trump. It was bad, constant lies ---but it's getting worse now.
Trump has learned (finally) how to use a Sharpie.
2
Yertle the Turtle is just as apt.
McConnell was probably bullied as a child and is getting his revenge by helping to destroy whatever is still f value in this republic.
2
It is time for me to give up. Just when I think it cannot get any worse, it does.
Thanks for the levity Gail, but it is now time for me to consider sleeping 24 hours a day, until it is time to vote in 2020.
2
I will take my bows now: I am an "Informed Citizen." That's okay with me. If I got all fourteen correct, I would worry that I am even more focused on The Donald than I already am. But as we have come to expect, Gail manages to pull us out of our slump for at least a few hours a week. It is nice to smile and giggle every once and a while, right? Although, I must admit I like Yertle the Turtle more for Moscow Mitch. He's not cute enough to be Putin's Poodle. As my final sign off: Did everyone read about Parliament making trouble for Trump's twin, Boris? (Does his first name seem ominous?) So let us wish really hard, try some prayers even, that we can flip the Senate and flip McConnell into the minority. Just think how much fun we will have via a Democratic Congress if we can rattle Trump's golden cage. But then again with someone like, say, Warren as President, these past two plus years will be but a bad dream.
6
After two and a half years of Trump, I still can't decide if I prefer a president who is a loose cannon or a president who would not open his mouth without a teleprompter.
I had 3 wrong and 10. But I'll not be giving away my wrong answers :) so as not to be a spoiler... Great way to remind us of how bonkers Trump is and showing why he should be removed asap!
> Question pointing out DNC's complicity in the enabling of special interests in politics
> Immediately followed by a weird swipe at the only candidate not taking money from special interests
This is what happens when you know things are wrong but you have no systemic critique to articulate those problems. I honestly could not come up with a more spot-on way to capture the problem with so many Democratic loyalists and affluent liberals. You see the issues at hand; you see them weakening the position of the people at least nominally aligned with your politics; but you cannot connect the dots without concluding that you benefit from the same forces that allow these problems to continue, so instead you publish a cutesy quiz to remind everyone that Trump is, in fact, a Bad Man. Obviously he is, but he's an effect of the problem, not the cause.
Actually, he's both.
1
If someone you knew fell into a coma in 2015 and when they awoke in 2019, and you told them that Trump had his own sitcom where he played the president of the United State and had members of his family on the staff and if you played that person all the video from the quotes in this quiz, that person would say, "Wow, I am so glad he's really not president".
2
Too easy! Look at 3 absurd choices ... select the most absurd.
And please do not overlook ... these are the Leaders of our nation.
1
We will remember this Presidency by the damage done to Democracy and its Blooper Reel.
4
14 of 14-Clearly, I'm overinformed.
2
Gail - Too many gimmies. Just pick the most absurd possibility and it has to be trump. But thanks anyway. Why didn't you mention the time when Air Force One took off with Lindsey Graham strapped to the roof?
1
In a frightening development, I somehow got 13/14 correct, even though I have attempted to avoid listening to, seeing or in any way acknowledging Donald Trump. Has his lunacy so infiltrated my very subconscious such that he cannot be turned off and tuned out—sort of like the mind-numbing, seemngly endless saga of Hannah Brown on The Bachelor?
1
Your quiz takes me back to the cleverness of Art Buchwald. Nothing enrages a tyrant like humor at his expense. TV news is completely devoid of humor, parroting tweets du jour and little else. Keep 'em coming, Gail.
10
Trump should take the quiz. He’d probably fail.
4
Clearly, I've misspent my summer -- 12 out of 14.
Mosquitoes, black flies, and Trump. Unfortunately, Trump won't disappear with the cooler autumn weather.
1
I have a serious question: Do people ever really "start over"?
I got them all. I so ashamed.
7
Even just quoting recent gaffes you're better on your own than with that thin- skinned "conservative." Wish you'd had a question: What did Bret Stephens do when he was called a bedbug?
1. Laughed
2. Tattled to the man's boss
3. Said nothing. He's a bigger man than that.
1
14 out of 14. I feel like I need to shower.
5
Shower, drink and cigarette.
Wait, there’s more!
Correction on question #6, Gail:
"Meeting with hospital medical staff after the El Paso mass shooting, Trump" took a photo and flashed a big grin and a clueless 'thumbs-up' sign to a new orphan whose Latino parents were just slaughtered at a Walmart by an AR-15 assault weapon made possible by Trump's Guns Over People and xenophobic public policies.
A more gruesome photo of an American President doesn't exist.
62
The most gruesome photo ? They're all gruesome.
1
Future history books will look back at this time and recoil at the stupidity, the cruelty and the incompetence on display that goes unnoticed by a willfully blind Republican Party. Any careful study of this time in American history should come with a soundtrack of slide flutes, rim shots and whoopie cushions. As I walk around, not believing what is happening around me, I know historians will note that that was how all the sane people felt.
2
13 of 14. Time to enter therapy.
1
I got one wrong and only because I can’t stand to hear anything about Bill de Blasio but gave him credit for not being an ignoramus.
This stuff only phases those of us who can still feel outrage and shame.
I faded badly at the end, blowing three of the last four to finish a so-so 10 of 14.
But at least Donald Trump wouldn't have gotten a single one right.
"Moscow Mitch" would have gotten one right: And it's not Yertle the Turtle.
14 out of 14 signals way too much of my time following
the lunacy of these swamp creatures.
1
the survey was clever, but my takeaway is "...Congress slinking back to Washington."
Nice, but you should have included a question reflecting Trump's latest acumen as a meteorologist:
a.) Dorian is a whooper, will definitely hit Alaska,
very bigly tornado here.
b.) Looks like Alabama will take a hit.
c.) Could be a category 6... might hit landfall in
Buffalo maybe lots of snow, could be... just saying,
you never really know.
2
13 out of 14. Missed the Democratic ethics reform question. If I couldn't decide between two answers, I just picked the dumbest one.
1
Oh, Gail, I wish that quiz had gone on for 100 questions!
1
I got 13 out of 14. Missed the one about Trump commending the Continental Army for "taking over the airports." I thought that was too stupid, even for Donald Trump to say. The man never ceases to surprise--and embarrass, and depress.
And it is no sure thing that he won't be reelected in 2020. Somebody once said Americans don't like to vote for anyone smarter than they are. At one time it was funny; now it really is not.
11/14. Can we go back to being boring?
Aced it. Does that mean it was easy, or I spend way too much time reading the NYTs ??? That was awesome, Gail. I’d love to see a quiz at least monthly. Think of the possibilities: Pence, Moscow Mitch and his Mules, Lindsay and the six degrees of sycophants, the Trump kids and their “Jobs”. Also, my personal favorite Cabinet Member, Rick Perry. Bless his heart, I haven’t seen or heard anything about him for months. I’m worried. Please advise.
3
As much as I love your columns Ms. Collins, none of this is the least bit funny anymore, hasn't been for some long time.
Gail, hopefully on January 20th 2021 you can give a back to reality quiz.
Unfortunately, the only person on the planet who could get every one of these answers wrong is the only person who is claimed to have said them all.
Too bad we've become numb to this type of dumb.
BTW, had there have been a 15th question before the deadline for this piece, it surely would have involved the 'Sharpie Hurricane Dorian Map.'
Vote.
11
Timing this quiz for Back to School season is perfect because politics really has become junior high.
13
Sadly, this was too easy. Even if you weren't exactly sure, it was just a matter of picking the most absurd answer. How I wish this was just an "Onion" thing.
2
14 out of 14. Yay? Not sure what that says, but I really wish we didn't have this kind of content for a quiz.
1
I enjoy the humor --- a gallows humor considering Trump's administration and its horrors---that Gail Collins brings in her writing. Focusing humor on Trump and party makes a lot of sense because his presidency is a big, big joke.
2
Got them all right. Now please tell me that none of these are true and it's all a bad dream.
3
Every single day, now that Trump is President, he is screaming at us and his cabinet--make by day, go ahead, invoke the 25th amendment. From incoherent policies, total, and I mean total ignorance, infantile sharpie pens defenses, musings about nuking hurricanes and sentences that no longer have subjects, verbs, and objects in the right order---and yet, our Congress and Cabinet acts as if Trump is just that uncle you have to invite to Thanksgiving.
2
I find that doing well on this text feels like doing bad...
1
13 out of 14. Alas, I'm sure. Missed the first one about Democrats. But the whole quiz was a day brightener, especially ofter IQ45's helpful weather forecasting map. Sigh!
1
You missed it because you were giving Democrats the benefit of the doubt. Lesson learned?
LOL Bill de Blasio:
"Was able to remember the names of only three New York boroughs."
ps I answered all correctly and am a bit concerned.
Love the quizzes! Wonder how 45 would score if he took them.
Buchanan has nothing to worry about.
Got them all right. I just had to think about the characters involved, and what was most likely for them to have said.
I got them all right. It was easy. The wrong answers weren't absurd enough.
2
Greenland. I just keep repeating it. Sums up so much.
2
"Only" 11 of 14. I guess I am not paying attention well enough. In my defense, we had company last week and I missed a couple that apparently were from then.
I got every single one. But the test was too easy, because all you had to do it picking the most absurd option, and it turned out to be correct.
10
I didn't miss any. I'm not sure what that says about me. Perhaps I have an ear for the absurd.
17
I missed two because I thought Trump to be more self centered than stupid (regarding the family members killed by ISIS) and Ryan to be more snarky than venal. I think I deserve partial credit on the Trump question.
Trump is ruining humor.
Normally, you'd think all of the answer choices were made up. but no - they are real.
And that's not funny at all.
Vote Democratic in 2020.
Every office, every seat.
68
I stopped listening to the morning news program on NPR because it was too depressing. Even though I had not heard about several of these stories, and guessed the answers, I got 100%. Sad.
25
How is it that the Administration has gone nuts and has infected the brains of the rest of us?
15
Wow! I got 11 out of 14! (I would have got 12, but I couldn’t believe the continental army shut down airports.)
17
This is the whopper that made a friend in Paris laugh merrily a few weeks ago, and which had never been heard here, while she added that 'He' cracks her up. 'Of armies and airports', & let us not forget that wars are no longer fought with horses and bayonets, a delightful 'quip' from our Last President in having an exchange with Mitt Romney.
Thanking Ms. Collins for this reminder that it is time to go back to school.
8
The bus stations were shut down too.
2
I just love Gail’s oblique, devastating multiple choice quizzes. The answers are becoming increasingly self-signaling as the “most ludicrous “ choice from the dimension formerly known as reality exceeds even her remarkable imagination.
53
Not sure if I'm paying too much attention or that it's just that Trump is so very predictable that one need not have heard him to know what he likely said...
83
Just more evidence that this is all a bad dream. I thought so.
11
Over achievement is certainly possible if you would add an extra credit choice relating to Boris Johnson.
30
Gail Collins, your columns are a breath of fresh air in this trumpian era. They help me maintain a measure of sanity.
30
Too late!
I missed the Bill de Blasio question, probably because I change the station every time he shows up on cable news.
10
Good choice, Mary.
Alright, Ms. Collins, this 'infomed citizen' might ask '"How are we doing America, with a non-functioning president?". The house alarm just went off, but fortunately it was not the panic button.
11
I missed two regarding the Democrats. Probably because I refuse to pay attention to the Dem primaries till they narrow it down to 4 challengers.
10
I got most of the Democrat-focused questions wrong. Those folks are complicated. Not so re: Trump and the Republicans -- 100% right. They are very predictable.
9
I've always stayed well informed about the news. But I can't take it anymore, with all the nonsense from the White House.
I'm going on a news fast. I'll focus on my garden. And reading some novels. And preparing for the Climate Strike on September 20. There is so much to do and following Trump's antics is a big waste of time.
19
I only got one wrong and, in retrospect, it was because I slipped up and didn't pick the most absurd, revolting choice available.
41
Gail, in the spirit of back-to-school, can't the nation recruit a cadre of retired knuckle-rapping nuns to sit with/stand beside/hold the phone of Very Stable Genius 45*, thereby instituting order, control, and self-restraint?
Pretty sure the DNC could raise $1 Billion$ by requesting donations to be sure an adequate stock of metal rulers was available to the Sisters at all times in the White House, on Air Force One, at Mar-a-Loco, etc., etc.
26
This is one of the best ideas I've seen for dealing with the juvenile delinquent in the White House. Especially given that--apparently--the Dems are prepared to allow him to engage in any level of corruption and criminality without attempting to rein him.
In fact, I wonder if he actually did shoot someone on 5th Ave., whether even that would push the Dems to impeach him.
Somehow I missed hearing question 1. I am sure it was reported in the Times but his answer using his popular expression was incredible. Clearly, this stuff is historic, which I note is a popular description used by the President.
2
I did depressingly well ....wish I didn't know some of this stuff ....
51
Question two was too easy; I highly doubt Trump knows Buchanan was a president.
37
14 for 14. Much better than I do on the NYT weekend weekly quiz.
Full disclosure: Lucky guesses on the donors and Guevara questions.
3
Another perfect score over here. I'm going to read a book and take a walk. Hope I get 10 right next time.
7
Sadly, a Perfect Score.
5
I scanned the quiz and then went straight to the state mental hospital. There I asked to be admitted via The Baker Act. They asked me if I intended to hurt myself or anyone else, and I said no!
They shrugged, so I revealed that I was about to take Gail Collins "end of summer" quiz. They did a few minutes research and said I might just qualify.
Yes, Donald and company are that weird!
Only joking, but we sometimes see life one or two issues at a time. This test is actually a good summary, and hard to believe, though true.
33
Got all but the first. Clearly I need to expand my boundaries of what's too OUT THERE, even for him.
10
"... Got all but the first …"
Same here, for the same reason. Airports in the 18th century?
This is a 'yuge' stretch, being off by more than a century than even that idiotic comment referring to the 19th century Frederick Douglass as doing a very, very good job, as if he were alive today.
13 out of 14-I have to dive deeper into Netflix -it is better than reality for sure!
25
Got every one.
Should I be gratified, or depressed?
73
I got everything, too. I’m going with depressed.
96
I got all but one (the Sanders and yelling one) and although a lot of them are jokes I'm depressed too.
11
14 out of 14; for my penance I will man the anti-gerrymandering booth at the county fair.
6